1 00:00:29,946 --> 00:00:31,948 [intro music] 2 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:43,418 [woman] Everyone's heard of the city that never sleeps. 3 00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:46,046 -[cars honking] -What about the mothers who never sleep 4 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:50,175 because their boys move to the city and never call? 5 00:00:50,675 --> 00:00:55,096 This is a story about three such mothers and their three sons. 6 00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:57,474 -Oh! Stop the cab! Stop the cab! -[girls scream] 7 00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,476 -[all laugh] -[guy 1] Look where we are. 8 00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,436 You guys are such profound assholes. 9 00:01:01,519 --> 00:01:04,564 -[guy 1] It's time, Daniel. -I know. I'm still deciding. 10 00:01:04,647 --> 00:01:06,983 -You decided. You got a ring. -[guy 2] Yes. 11 00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,568 -You're getting engaged! -Yes. 12 00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:10,153 Right now? Isn't that fantastic? 13 00:01:10,236 --> 00:01:12,989 I'm not asking Erin to marry me tonight, drunk with girls in the car. 14 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,407 -No offense. -Come on! Go! 15 00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:16,868 -[girl] We're going to Matt's. -D, I love you, but get out. 16 00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:18,078 [girl squeals and laughs] 17 00:01:18,203 --> 00:01:20,080 -[guy 2] Come on. Come on. -[girl 2] Bye. 18 00:01:20,955 --> 00:01:21,831 Look... 19 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:24,125 you are happy with Erin. 20 00:01:24,626 --> 00:01:27,253 Like, happier than I've seen you since... 21 00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:29,005 sixth grade. 22 00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:31,716 Dude! Remember when you said you'd have your first novel finished 23 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:33,927 by the end of the year, three ends-of-the-years ago? 24 00:01:34,010 --> 00:01:35,929 -Horrible pep talk. -These are the facts. 25 00:01:36,012 --> 00:01:37,639 She's hot. I'm gonna do it if you don't. [laughs] 26 00:01:37,722 --> 00:01:39,390 -That's actually a better pep talk. -[guy 1 shouts] Erin! 27 00:01:39,474 --> 00:01:40,642 -[guy 1] All right. -[Daniel shushes] 28 00:01:40,725 --> 00:01:42,393 Baby! Erin! 29 00:01:43,311 --> 00:01:46,564 -This is why we don't hang out anymore. -[guy 1] Listen to me, okay? 30 00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:48,608 This would be romantic. 31 00:01:48,691 --> 00:01:51,653 This is the story that she's gonna tell your kids. 32 00:01:51,736 --> 00:01:55,573 She's gonna say, "That's the night that he stormed up the stairs 33 00:01:56,032 --> 00:01:57,450 and got down on one knee..." 34 00:01:58,326 --> 00:02:00,662 And you asked if she would marry you. 35 00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:05,166 -That is novel material. -[guy 2] Novel material. 36 00:02:07,335 --> 00:02:10,213 -It would be a pretty great story. -Ahhh! 37 00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:15,009 [woman] We were there for every big life event 38 00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:18,304 and now we're lucky if we hear about anything at all. 39 00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:27,230 [rummaging noises] 40 00:02:29,274 --> 00:02:30,108 Erin? 41 00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:33,403 Daniel? 42 00:02:36,197 --> 00:02:37,073 What the fuck? 43 00:02:38,908 --> 00:02:41,202 [woman] There's a lot you don't know as mothers. 44 00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:43,329 In fact, that's what bonded us 45 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,999 when the boys' friendship launched our friendship 46 00:02:46,124 --> 00:02:49,210 on a playground in Poughkeepsie. 47 00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:50,503 ["Lean on Me" playing] 48 00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:53,214 ♪ Sometimes in our lives ♪ 49 00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:55,842 ♪ We all have pain ♪ 50 00:02:56,259 --> 00:03:00,430 ♪ We all have sorrow ♪ 51 00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:01,723 ♪ But... ♪ 52 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:04,350 [woman] We've been through so much together. 53 00:03:04,684 --> 00:03:06,978 Graduations, proms, skinned knees, 54 00:03:07,061 --> 00:03:12,400 emergency room visits, family vacations, bad days, bad jobs. 55 00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:15,695 And at every scary and unfamiliar stage, 56 00:03:16,070 --> 00:03:19,782 the answer was always "friends." 57 00:03:20,074 --> 00:03:22,076 [piano playing "Lean on Me"] 58 00:03:23,828 --> 00:03:27,290 That's Gillian. She still has kids in the house, 59 00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:28,833 they're just not hers. 60 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:30,835 Why are you teaching today? 61 00:03:32,253 --> 00:03:35,882 It's just one lesson. He wants to play this later for his mother. 62 00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:38,968 -He still likes her. -[man] Daniel texted you already. 63 00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:42,764 Nothing says "I don't wanna talk to you" like a text. 64 00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:45,308 -He said he misses us. -That's nice. 65 00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:47,268 Hmm. It's a lie. 66 00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:50,230 -But it's a nice lie. -[chuckles] 67 00:03:54,192 --> 00:03:56,277 -[woman] And that's Helen. -[scoffs] 68 00:03:56,361 --> 00:04:00,198 She never ages. At least, not publicly. 69 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:05,578 [Helen] Frank, I have to run a few errands before I go to Carol's. 70 00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:07,914 Would you tell her that I could sell her house tomorrow 71 00:04:07,997 --> 00:04:09,332 if she just gave me the listing? 72 00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:12,126 [sighs] Are you spray-painting the top of your head again? 73 00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:14,212 I'm tall enough, so no one even sees it. 74 00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,214 Unless you're sitting. 75 00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:18,633 Carol talks a good game, Frank, 76 00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:20,969 but she will never sell that house. 77 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:23,054 You'd have to sell it with her in it. 78 00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:27,725 [Carol] The three of us don't see each other as often as we used to. 79 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,394 The boys are gone. 80 00:04:29,477 --> 00:04:31,479 Husbands have come and gone. 81 00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:34,732 But one tradition remains. 82 00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:36,025 [doorbell rings] 83 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:39,404 -I'm so glad we're still doing this! -[Helen] Happy Mother's Day! 84 00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:42,407 Without husbands and kids, it might actually be fun. 85 00:04:42,490 --> 00:04:45,243 -[Gillian] I brought donuts. -Oh! [laughs] 86 00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:46,869 [Helen] I brought bourbon. 87 00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:49,747 Like, I'm really going to drink a mimosa? It's Mother's Day. 88 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:51,207 I knew I should have Ubered. 89 00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:55,503 [Helen] Guys, I think the guy at the liquor store was flirting with me. 90 00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:58,756 [Carol] Oh, I can't remember the last time someone flirted with me. 91 00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:01,217 [Helen] I bet it happens all the time. You're just not flirting back. 92 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,511 -[chuckles] -Why do you flirt back? You're married. 93 00:05:03,594 --> 00:05:05,596 [Helen] Well, my marriage isn't as perfect as yours, Gillian. 94 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,015 Besides, flirting isn't cheating, 95 00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:08,891 it's just a little pick-me-up for your ego. 96 00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,560 It keeps your in shape, sexually speaking. 97 00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:12,478 -[Carol chuckles] -Ah, so it's sexercise. 98 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,314 Yes, women should sexercise daily. 99 00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:17,400 Ooh! Terrific, another thing that I'm not doing. 100 00:05:17,483 --> 00:05:18,985 -[all laugh] -Come on! 101 00:05:19,068 --> 00:05:22,613 There's nothing you're not doing. Look at this spread. 102 00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:24,782 And you're always volunteering... 103 00:05:24,866 --> 00:05:28,661 Oh, please. I teach art in a retirement home two days a week. 104 00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:30,121 I'm hardly Mother Teresa. 105 00:05:30,204 --> 00:05:32,206 And look at your house, it's spotless. 106 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:35,585 The key to a clean house? Dead husband. [gasps] 107 00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:39,672 Oh, God. [chuckles] That came out much darker than I intended. 108 00:05:39,756 --> 00:05:42,759 -No, that's a great household tip. -[all laugh] 109 00:05:44,302 --> 00:05:46,512 What is with these flowers? 110 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:49,474 Come on, they get bigger every year. Did Matt send these? 111 00:05:49,557 --> 00:05:51,684 Yes. Delivered this morning. 112 00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:54,520 Matty is the perfect son. He never forgets. 113 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:57,315 -Is he dating anyone? -He doesn't have time. 114 00:05:57,398 --> 00:06:00,318 And he's helping to launch some new sports magazine. 115 00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:03,363 So, he just works, works out and sleeps, so he says. 116 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:06,074 No, Paul is the same way, he never mentions dating anyone. 117 00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:09,410 God, I wish Daniel would date someone other than that Erin. 118 00:06:10,244 --> 00:06:12,080 She's not good enough for him. I told him that. 119 00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:14,207 Oh! And how did that go? 120 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:19,253 -He unfriended me. -See? Now, that's why I'm not on Facebook. 121 00:06:19,337 --> 00:06:20,630 -[Gillian] Aww. -[Helen] Oh! 122 00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:23,716 -Remember how cute they were? -[Gillian] Remember how cute we were? 123 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,343 When did I turn 50? 124 00:06:25,426 --> 00:06:29,305 Oh, several years after I did, so shut up and enjoy your youth. 125 00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:31,682 I love that with us, we don't have to lie about our age. 126 00:06:31,766 --> 00:06:34,435 I love with us, we don't have to lie about anything. 127 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:35,353 Hmm. 128 00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:38,356 [Gillian] Look, I've just polished off a whole donut in front of you two. 129 00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:42,443 I didn't even pretend to only want half. Come on, that's friendship. 130 00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:44,487 [Helen] Aww, you are so right. 131 00:06:49,158 --> 00:06:50,910 I sent myself the flowers. 132 00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:58,626 I've been doing it for a while now. 133 00:06:59,544 --> 00:07:02,004 And each year it gets more and more depressing 134 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,881 so I get bigger and bigger flowers. [chuckles] 135 00:07:03,965 --> 00:07:05,383 [chuckles] 136 00:07:05,883 --> 00:07:06,717 Well... 137 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,720 but you don't include a note, do you? [chuckles] 138 00:07:09,804 --> 00:07:13,266 [laughing] No! I would not write my own... 139 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,309 Yes. 140 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,436 [gasps] 141 00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:18,354 What did the note say this year? 142 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:22,483 -You are the best mother ever. -Yes. 143 00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:25,736 -Well, you are. -What son forgets Mother's Day? 144 00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:28,448 What kind of son sends a Mother's Day text? 145 00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:29,907 [irritated] Pass the bourbon. 146 00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:31,617 [Gillian] Come on, lazy! 147 00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:33,619 Buy me some bath salts. Is that so difficult? 148 00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:36,205 Hmm. A candle. A frame, something. 149 00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,374 I should have sent myself flowers. It's brilliant. 150 00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,585 Daniel can't call me from Long Island City? 151 00:07:40,668 --> 00:07:42,879 God, I have a girl for him to meet. 152 00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:45,173 -The little jerk won't even call me back. -[coughs] 153 00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:47,341 Paul stopped caring about me when I married Frank. 154 00:07:47,425 --> 00:07:49,886 Matt hasn't been home since Finn's funeral. 155 00:07:49,969 --> 00:07:54,015 And he barely came home for that, stayed 16 hours, and he wore sneakers. 156 00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:56,184 They were nice ones. They were Gucci. 157 00:07:56,267 --> 00:07:57,435 [exhales deeply] 158 00:07:58,436 --> 00:07:59,520 What did we do wrong? 159 00:08:00,104 --> 00:08:02,773 We did everything right. That's what we did wrong. 160 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:07,028 And we raised our children to be free-thinking, independent beings 161 00:08:07,111 --> 00:08:09,447 and now, they just don't need us anymore. 162 00:08:09,530 --> 00:08:12,074 Well, they're gonna need us again when they have kids. 163 00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,785 -When we're grandmothers. -I don't want to be a grandmother, but... 164 00:08:15,536 --> 00:08:17,455 I would like one Mother's Day card. 165 00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:19,248 [chuckles] 166 00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:20,208 [Gillian] Motherhood. 167 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:24,337 That sinking feeling that as your child's growing up 168 00:08:24,420 --> 00:08:28,257 that you're being broken up with, on a gradual but daily basis. 169 00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:31,093 It's inhumane emotional waterboarding. 170 00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:35,348 That is the best description of motherhood I've ever heard. 171 00:08:35,431 --> 00:08:36,474 Mm-hmm. 172 00:08:36,557 --> 00:08:40,269 Well, at this stage, it doesn't feel like motherhood. It feels like "otherhood." 173 00:08:40,728 --> 00:08:42,480 Oh, my God, you're so right. 174 00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:44,315 I don't want to be an other. 175 00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:46,817 Me neither. But what are we going to do? 176 00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:49,654 Drive to Manhattan, storm their apartments? 177 00:08:49,820 --> 00:08:52,073 No, we've got to respect their space, 178 00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:56,577 let them individuate, blah, blah, blah. 179 00:08:57,662 --> 00:08:58,496 Except... 180 00:08:59,622 --> 00:09:01,207 it's fucking Mother's Day. 181 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:07,213 ["These Boots Are Made For Walkin'" playing] 182 00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:12,301 [screams excitedly] Come on, Carol! We're doing this! 183 00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:17,223 [Helen screaming] I'm so excited! 184 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,766 [Carol] Okay. All set. 185 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,810 [Gillian] Oh, my God. See ya! 186 00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:24,730 -I need some grown-up luggage. -This is my good-luck bag from Guatemala. 187 00:09:24,814 --> 00:09:26,941 [Helen excitedly] Here we go! Yay! 188 00:09:27,024 --> 00:09:29,068 [all laughing and screaming] 189 00:09:32,029 --> 00:09:34,949 [all three singing] ♪ And now someone else Is getting all your best ♪ 190 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:39,078 ♪ These boots are made for walking ♪ 191 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:41,789 ♪ And that's just what they'll do ♪ 192 00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:47,295 ♪ And one of these days These boots are gonna walk all over you ♪ 193 00:09:47,378 --> 00:09:48,713 [all cheering and screaming] 194 00:09:48,796 --> 00:09:50,965 -[Carol] Go, go boots! -[Gillian] Hear us, boys?! 195 00:09:51,048 --> 00:09:53,175 [Helen] We should go on America's Got Talent. 196 00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,677 [all three laughing] 197 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:57,346 ♪ You keep lying When you ought to be truthing ♪ 198 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,307 What was wrong with the old bridge? 199 00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:02,643 ♪ You keep losing When you ought to not bet ♪ 200 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:04,353 She was sagging... 201 00:10:05,062 --> 00:10:06,105 a little. 202 00:10:06,188 --> 00:10:08,190 ["These Boots Are Made For Walkin'" still playing] 203 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:10,484 [sighs] 204 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:14,822 ♪ What's right is right But you ain't been right yet ♪ 205 00:10:15,823 --> 00:10:18,659 ♪ These boots are made for walking ♪ 206 00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:21,370 ♪ And that's just what they'll do ♪ 207 00:10:21,704 --> 00:10:26,459 ♪ One of these days these boots Are gonna walk all over you ♪ 208 00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:31,797 I think the bourbon just wore off. Have we really thought this through? 209 00:10:31,881 --> 00:10:33,633 What if the boys don't want to see us? 210 00:10:33,716 --> 00:10:38,220 Mother isn't just a noun, it's a verb. It requires action. 211 00:10:38,387 --> 00:10:40,097 I read that some place. 212 00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:42,475 -Well, I teach on Tuesdays. -Just call in sick. 213 00:10:42,558 --> 00:10:45,186 That's what I did for the first time in... ever. 214 00:10:45,269 --> 00:10:47,146 I brought five clean pairs of underwear. 215 00:10:47,229 --> 00:10:49,649 -Hey, I might be sick all week. -[gasps] 216 00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:53,110 All week? Well, how long are we staying? 217 00:10:53,194 --> 00:10:54,779 Until we feel like mothers again. 218 00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:57,490 [scoffs] Why can't we feel like mothers from a hotel room? 219 00:10:57,573 --> 00:10:59,283 Now, that is a valid question. 220 00:10:59,408 --> 00:11:02,620 Because we're not on vacation, we are on a mission. 221 00:11:02,703 --> 00:11:05,164 And they can deal with having us in their homes for a few days. 222 00:11:05,247 --> 00:11:07,708 -They were in ours for 18 years. -[Gillian] Hmm. 223 00:11:07,833 --> 00:11:08,959 [ice clinks in cup] 224 00:11:10,002 --> 00:11:13,214 [Gillian] You got this, champ! Go in and call us when you're in! 225 00:11:13,297 --> 00:11:14,799 -[screams] -[Carol] Gillian, I can't do this! 226 00:11:14,882 --> 00:11:17,093 [Helen] Oh, you can! You're gonna do really great. 227 00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:18,427 [Carol] No, no. Let's stop this. 228 00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,221 -Yeah, you are! -[Gillian screaming] 229 00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:22,890 [raised voice] Don't take no for an answer. Make him love you! 230 00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:25,810 [shouting] Helen, Gillian! Wait! 231 00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:28,062 [car honks] 232 00:11:31,273 --> 00:11:33,025 [buzzes intercom] 233 00:11:34,151 --> 00:11:36,570 -[Matt over intercom] Yeah. -Hi, I just happen to be in the neighbor-- 234 00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:41,492 -I'm downstairs, it's your mo-- -[door buzzes open] 235 00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:47,581 [elevator bell] 236 00:11:52,336 --> 00:11:53,629 [knock at door] 237 00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:01,095 Mom? 238 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:05,141 -Uh, what are you-- -I was just missing you today. 239 00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:06,142 [Carol breathes heavily] 240 00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:08,811 -Shit, it's Mother's Day. -[Carol gasps] Is it? 241 00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:11,272 -I was gonna call. -Can I come in? 242 00:12:11,355 --> 00:12:13,774 Yeah. Of course. Please. 243 00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:17,111 Please. [chuckles] Um... 244 00:12:17,319 --> 00:12:19,697 -[breathes heavily] -I sent the elevator. 245 00:12:19,780 --> 00:12:21,741 Oh, It's just five floors. 246 00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:22,867 [chuckles] 247 00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:25,369 Well, can I get you something? 248 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:27,621 Well, you didn't even hug me. 249 00:12:28,330 --> 00:12:30,291 -I... -[Carol chuckles] 250 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,877 You caught me off guard. [chuckles] 251 00:12:36,505 --> 00:12:37,715 Happy Mother's Day, Mom. 252 00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:41,177 -Ah, let's just sit. -Yeah. 253 00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:43,262 Uh, let's just put this away. 254 00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:47,391 That's gone. And stack that up. 255 00:12:50,978 --> 00:12:52,146 [exhales] 256 00:12:52,855 --> 00:12:54,607 [laughs] That's not even... 257 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,693 [clears throat] 258 00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,449 -[sighs] -[Carol laughs] 259 00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:10,039 I've been thinking about our relationship and, um, I... 260 00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:15,002 I don't think we have one. 261 00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:16,921 What? Mom. 262 00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:20,758 Mom, you are my mom. How could we not have one? 263 00:13:20,841 --> 00:13:22,092 What's my favorite flower? 264 00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:26,764 -We have a relationship. -Then tell me something about me. 265 00:13:27,097 --> 00:13:29,558 Okay, there are a thousand things that I know about you. 266 00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:31,352 [Carol sighs] Irises. 267 00:13:32,853 --> 00:13:33,854 I... I knew that. 268 00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:38,943 Um, I want to stay for a few days. 269 00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:41,487 What? No. Mom. I mean, why? 270 00:13:41,570 --> 00:13:44,573 Because you still live like a 15-year old, sweetheart, 271 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:45,741 I mean, look! 272 00:13:46,033 --> 00:13:47,451 Look at this mess. 273 00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:52,081 I'll clean while you think of ten things that you honestly know about me. 274 00:13:52,164 --> 00:13:53,332 Okay, Mom. Ten? 275 00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:56,168 -It's going to take me days to clean-- -Mom! Mom! 276 00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:58,295 I have a woman for that. 277 00:13:58,379 --> 00:14:01,340 Well, how often does she come? Biannually? 278 00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:03,425 [door opens] 279 00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:11,058 [soft instrumental jazzy music] 280 00:14:39,587 --> 00:14:41,589 [sighs] Mm-mmm. 281 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,927 [phone ringing] 282 00:14:50,472 --> 00:14:53,767 [on phone] Hey, it's Daniel Lieberman. I'm guessing you know what to do. 283 00:14:55,352 --> 00:14:56,604 [exhales heavily] 284 00:14:58,022 --> 00:14:59,773 -[phone ringing] -[exhales] 285 00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:06,572 -Oh, God. -[pills rattle] 286 00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:09,491 Did you get in? 287 00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:11,660 Yeah. [chuckles] I got in. 288 00:15:12,494 --> 00:15:13,454 Tell me something. 289 00:15:13,537 --> 00:15:15,414 Does Paul have drapes? 290 00:15:15,497 --> 00:15:17,958 Matt has 75 pairs of 291 00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:20,127 brand new sneakers, but no drapes. 292 00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:22,755 Yes, Paul has drapes. 293 00:15:23,505 --> 00:15:24,340 Listen... 294 00:15:26,133 --> 00:15:28,093 would you mind if I called you back tomorrow? 295 00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:29,762 Oh, yeah, sure, sorry. 296 00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:31,221 Enjoy! 297 00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:33,599 Okay. Yeah, I will. Goodnight, honey. 298 00:15:33,807 --> 00:15:35,351 [sighs deeply] 299 00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,273 [phone ringing] 300 00:15:41,899 --> 00:15:42,775 Just stop. 301 00:15:43,859 --> 00:15:45,945 [groans] 302 00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:49,448 I'm a coward, okay? Hey. 303 00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:51,408 Hey. Thank you. 304 00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,202 How's it going with Paul? 305 00:15:53,327 --> 00:15:57,581 [Helen] Good. Paul has been very gracious. 306 00:15:58,332 --> 00:15:59,792 He just poured me a drink. 307 00:16:00,167 --> 00:16:02,086 How's it going with Daniel? 308 00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:05,714 I'm going to go by in the morning. Daniel's not answering the phone. 309 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,758 I think he's got that caller ID thing. 310 00:16:08,175 --> 00:16:10,052 But I'll tell you this, Long Island City 311 00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:12,346 is the place to go if you want to be stabbed. 312 00:16:12,429 --> 00:16:13,263 [Helen chuckles] 313 00:16:13,347 --> 00:16:15,683 [Gillian] 'Cause I was terrified to get out of my car. 314 00:16:16,183 --> 00:16:20,020 Hey, have you heard of this place, the Hudson Hotel? 315 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:21,897 It's where Joel got the best rate. 316 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,816 [Helen] Oh, yeah. It's supposed to be cool. 317 00:16:23,899 --> 00:16:27,820 [Gillian] It's really cool. I mean, it's more like a club than a hotel. 318 00:16:29,029 --> 00:16:32,491 [whispering] And the bellboys are gorgeous. 319 00:16:32,574 --> 00:16:35,077 [Helen] Gillian, you scamp. 320 00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:37,746 [laughs] Uh, I'm gonna ambush 321 00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:39,415 Daniel when it's light. 322 00:16:39,623 --> 00:16:40,958 Oh, listen. 323 00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:44,003 It is okay that you decided to wait. 324 00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:46,505 It's a difficult thing to do. 325 00:16:47,339 --> 00:16:48,757 I don't blame you. 326 00:16:49,216 --> 00:16:52,803 [stammers] Actually... I've... [breathes heavily] 327 00:16:54,638 --> 00:16:55,472 I've... 328 00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:57,808 [Gillian] Oh, hey, can you tell Paul that I said hi? 329 00:16:57,975 --> 00:16:59,018 Hmm. 330 00:16:59,893 --> 00:17:01,562 Gillian says hello. 331 00:17:02,563 --> 00:17:04,023 Paul says hello back. 332 00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:06,275 -[Gillian] All right, sweet dreams. -Okay. 333 00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:08,527 -[Gillian] Night, hun. -Good night. 334 00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:12,448 [scoffs] 335 00:17:16,326 --> 00:17:19,121 -[cars honking] -[siren wailing] 336 00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:39,641 [Carol] I found some sausages in your freezer. 337 00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:43,187 Took the skillet I gave you for college graduation out of the box. 338 00:17:43,479 --> 00:17:46,023 Well, I don't eat breakfast. 339 00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:50,110 You used to eat breakfast. "Most important meal of the day." 340 00:17:50,194 --> 00:17:54,198 [chuckles] Yeah, according to Dad, and whoever said it originally. 341 00:17:54,281 --> 00:17:56,533 Probably someone involved in the cereal business. 342 00:17:56,617 --> 00:17:57,451 [laughs] 343 00:17:59,536 --> 00:18:02,873 I need to get dressed and get to work. 344 00:18:02,956 --> 00:18:04,374 Oh, well, don't let me stop you. 345 00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:08,462 -Are those banana pancakes? -Mmm. 346 00:18:10,964 --> 00:18:13,342 Well, I guess one... 347 00:18:13,884 --> 00:18:14,927 wouldn't kill me. 348 00:18:17,387 --> 00:18:18,597 [doorbell rings] 349 00:18:26,063 --> 00:18:27,356 -It's after 8:00, you're late. -[Helen] Hi. I-- 350 00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:29,983 And if you touch anything on my desk, you're fired. Understand? 351 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:32,903 -I'm here to see Paul. -He'll pay you. [shouts] Andre! 352 00:18:32,986 --> 00:18:34,363 -Don't mess up. -Okay. 353 00:18:41,036 --> 00:18:42,204 -[door slams shut] -Oh! 354 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,624 -Hi. -Hi. 355 00:18:46,041 --> 00:18:47,918 -You're the new housekeeper. -[Helen laughs] 356 00:18:48,502 --> 00:18:50,504 I'm Paul's mother. 357 00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:54,883 I'm Helen. 358 00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:57,344 -Right, yes, sorry. Hi, I'm Andre. -Hi. 359 00:18:57,427 --> 00:18:59,346 -Nice to meet you. -Are you... 360 00:18:59,429 --> 00:19:01,306 are you Paul's boyfriend? 361 00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:04,768 [stutters] I'll see if he's dressed. 362 00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:07,146 Um... I just made some coffee. 363 00:19:07,229 --> 00:19:09,356 -I'd love some coffee. -Please, join me. 364 00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:13,443 [Helen] Uh... 365 00:19:14,611 --> 00:19:17,239 Paul never officially came out to me, you know. 366 00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,616 -So... -[Andre] Did you ever ask? 367 00:19:21,076 --> 00:19:23,495 It wasn't my place to ask. It was his place to tell. 368 00:19:24,204 --> 00:19:27,457 I'm sure at some point he knew I knew, but we never, you know... 369 00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:28,792 talked about it. 370 00:19:28,876 --> 00:19:31,545 Ah, well, my parents are visually deaf, I mean... 371 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,547 -Hello? -[both laugh] 372 00:19:34,339 --> 00:19:35,799 What do you do, Andre? 373 00:19:35,883 --> 00:19:38,218 Uh, as little as I can get away with. 374 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:39,553 Oh! 375 00:19:40,470 --> 00:19:41,597 He never alters his pattern. 376 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,433 I can tell by the creaks in the floor when he's about to come downstairs. 377 00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:45,350 Oh! 378 00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:48,645 Oh, my God. I owe you a blow job. 379 00:19:48,729 --> 00:19:50,189 -Your mother. -Your mother. 380 00:19:50,272 --> 00:19:52,024 [elevated voice] Surprise! 381 00:19:52,107 --> 00:19:53,275 [laughs] 382 00:19:53,358 --> 00:19:54,610 Hey, Mom! 383 00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,029 -[laughing] Boo! -[laughs] 384 00:19:57,112 --> 00:20:00,490 I know it doesn't make any sense for me to try to maintain that house. 385 00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:02,451 It's in constant need of repairs. 386 00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:05,287 And no one's even been in the pool since your father died. 387 00:20:05,746 --> 00:20:08,123 -So, just sell it. -But we've been there for 20 years. 388 00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:09,833 -I haven't. -He didn't want me to be alone, 389 00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,251 and I don't want to be, but... 390 00:20:12,002 --> 00:20:13,045 the mattress... 391 00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:16,465 it sags where your father slept. 392 00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:20,260 And I keep thinking, "Maybe I should just buy a new one." 393 00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:21,887 But if I did that, then... 394 00:20:23,096 --> 00:20:25,933 the mattress wouldn't sag where your father slept. 395 00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:39,780 Well, that's a nice greeting for your mother. 396 00:20:40,989 --> 00:20:43,116 What's a nice greeting? I didn't say anything. 397 00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:45,285 -That's what I'm talking about. -[door closes] 398 00:20:46,536 --> 00:20:48,247 Are you and Dad fighting or something? 399 00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:49,998 I came to see if you were okay. 400 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,084 I'm fantastic. 401 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:54,544 You... want a screwdriver or something? 402 00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:56,171 Are you trying to make me cry? 403 00:20:56,380 --> 00:20:59,258 Can you not threaten me with feelings, Ma? Just don't worry about me. 404 00:20:59,841 --> 00:21:01,969 Your life is your life. Mine is mine. 405 00:21:02,052 --> 00:21:04,763 Oh, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. 406 00:21:04,846 --> 00:21:07,599 If everyone was just here for themselves, life would be pointless. 407 00:21:08,016 --> 00:21:09,184 Life is pointless. 408 00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:11,436 Children give your life meaning. 409 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:13,814 You are the point of my life, Daniel. 410 00:21:13,897 --> 00:21:16,066 Please, don't make me question my existence. 411 00:21:16,149 --> 00:21:18,694 -Oh, my God, Ma. What are you doing here? -Really? 412 00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:22,823 That's where we are? I drive for hours and hours and the first thing 413 00:21:22,906 --> 00:21:25,867 -you say is, "What are you doing here?" -It wasn't the first thing I said, 414 00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:27,786 -it was the last thing I said. -[sighs] Okay. 415 00:21:28,912 --> 00:21:31,331 I'll go. If you don't want me, I'll go. I'll just get my bag-- 416 00:21:31,415 --> 00:21:32,916 Ma, I'm not saying I don't want you. 417 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,127 I'm just wondering why you didn't call me first to tell me you were coming. 418 00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:37,504 You didn't call me on Mother's Day. 419 00:21:37,587 --> 00:21:39,715 I'm not holding that against you. 420 00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:40,924 I texted you. 421 00:21:41,091 --> 00:21:42,175 I birthed you. 422 00:21:42,884 --> 00:21:44,594 Anyway, that's not why I'm here. 423 00:21:44,678 --> 00:21:46,972 I found you a nice Jewish girl. 424 00:21:47,055 --> 00:21:48,515 You weren't even Jewish. 425 00:21:48,765 --> 00:21:50,475 I converted, for you. 426 00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:52,019 Okay, you converted for Dad. 427 00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:54,896 Yes, so we could raise our kids as Jews. 428 00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:56,815 So, stop dating the shiksas. 429 00:21:56,898 --> 00:21:58,150 [bottles clinking] 430 00:21:58,608 --> 00:21:59,943 Are you talking about Erin? 431 00:22:00,027 --> 00:22:02,237 Erin. What kind of name is that? 432 00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:04,281 It's like the leftovers of a Scrabble hand. 433 00:22:04,364 --> 00:22:06,783 Mm-hmm. That's a character flaw now? Her name? 434 00:22:06,867 --> 00:22:08,994 You met her once, you barely even spoke to her. 435 00:22:09,077 --> 00:22:12,039 -You never even gave her a chance. -I saw her social media. 436 00:22:12,122 --> 00:22:14,541 A lot of Margarita nights. She's a drinker. 437 00:22:15,125 --> 00:22:17,002 -I'm a drinker. -You're a thinker. 438 00:22:17,085 --> 00:22:19,046 You use alcohol as a coping mechanism. 439 00:22:19,546 --> 00:22:21,673 That's the definition of alcoholism. 440 00:22:21,757 --> 00:22:23,759 You're an intellectual, she's a hairdresser. 441 00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:25,719 Hairstylist. And so what? 442 00:22:25,802 --> 00:22:29,181 So, let her style your hair, but don't procreate with her. 443 00:22:29,264 --> 00:22:31,767 That is so classist and offensive. 444 00:22:31,850 --> 00:22:34,269 And it's over. So, why don't you just move on, okay? 445 00:22:34,603 --> 00:22:35,687 I have. 446 00:22:36,605 --> 00:22:38,607 Remember the Brimers? 447 00:22:39,524 --> 00:22:41,401 -Ivan and Joan. -No. 448 00:22:41,485 --> 00:22:44,863 On the corner, with that horrible shih tzu that bit you when you were six. 449 00:22:44,946 --> 00:22:46,198 Yeah, I remember the dog. 450 00:22:46,281 --> 00:22:49,951 Well, Joan's sister has a nephew by marriage in Yonkers, 451 00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:53,580 and he gave me this number of this brilliant woman from his temple. 452 00:22:53,663 --> 00:22:58,085 She's just been through a painful divorce, which apparently was not her fault at all. 453 00:22:58,168 --> 00:22:59,419 Okay, good to know. 454 00:22:59,503 --> 00:23:02,964 And she is a beautiful person. She's friends with his wife. 455 00:23:03,048 --> 00:23:05,550 Oh, my God. Ma, you've never even met her, have you? 456 00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:07,594 I saw her social media. 457 00:23:07,677 --> 00:23:09,554 She is smart. 458 00:23:09,638 --> 00:23:10,972 She did a beach clean-up. 459 00:23:11,473 --> 00:23:13,558 Daniel, she's starting to think about dating again. 460 00:23:14,017 --> 00:23:15,560 We got to get in there fast. 461 00:23:15,644 --> 00:23:17,896 When I reached out to her, I told her that you were nearby 462 00:23:17,979 --> 00:23:20,732 and in a similar boat. She said she would love to hear from you. 463 00:23:20,816 --> 00:23:21,858 Why have you done this? 464 00:23:22,275 --> 00:23:24,111 Her name is Alison. 465 00:23:24,528 --> 00:23:27,531 She graduated from Brown. She has a political science degree. 466 00:23:27,614 --> 00:23:29,074 She does something in television. 467 00:23:29,157 --> 00:23:30,367 Okay, let me get this straight. 468 00:23:30,450 --> 00:23:32,327 You want me to go on a date with this woman 469 00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:36,331 based on the fact that she attends temple with some guy in Yonkers, 470 00:23:36,540 --> 00:23:39,751 who's somehow related to the woman whose dog bit me when I was a kid. 471 00:23:39,835 --> 00:23:42,129 You can't hold that horrible dog against her. 472 00:23:42,212 --> 00:23:44,089 I'm not talking about the dog, Ma. 473 00:23:44,881 --> 00:23:46,508 I'm talking about your insanity. 474 00:23:47,008 --> 00:23:48,844 Ooh! Good shot. 475 00:23:48,927 --> 00:23:51,263 [scoffs] Have you had a date since you've lived here? 476 00:23:51,346 --> 00:23:53,348 I don't think this apartment is helping at all. 477 00:23:53,432 --> 00:23:55,434 It's like you're living in Gollum's cave. 478 00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:59,438 Okay, Ma, thanks for the dating advice. Please, just leave it. Please. 479 00:23:59,813 --> 00:24:02,190 I'm not leaving New York until you call her. 480 00:24:02,566 --> 00:24:05,360 You can't force me to go on a date with someone. 481 00:24:05,485 --> 00:24:08,113 I call it prodding, a gentle little nudge. 482 00:24:08,196 --> 00:24:10,866 Okay, I'll be back at supper time. 483 00:24:10,991 --> 00:24:12,993 I need my Mace and my keys. 484 00:24:13,618 --> 00:24:16,663 I'll be back. Alive. [chuckles] Hopefully. 485 00:24:16,746 --> 00:24:17,956 [door closes] 486 00:24:25,005 --> 00:24:26,173 Hi, is this Alison? 487 00:24:26,548 --> 00:24:29,801 It's... It's... Daniel Lieberman. 488 00:24:30,510 --> 00:24:32,679 My mom said I should call you. 489 00:24:33,430 --> 00:24:37,267 So, Paul lives with his... Andre? 490 00:24:37,350 --> 00:24:38,768 Yes, and some other people. 491 00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:41,146 It's kinda great. It's sort of a group home for gays. 492 00:24:41,229 --> 00:24:43,482 There's an older Wall Street guy that owns the place 493 00:24:43,565 --> 00:24:46,026 and a tiny man who is very abrupt. [chuckles] 494 00:24:46,109 --> 00:24:48,862 And I told Andre I was gonna cook for the whole gang tonight. 495 00:24:48,945 --> 00:24:52,699 You? Cooking? That's more shocking than your son coming out. 496 00:24:52,991 --> 00:24:56,119 Well, apparently he's been completely out to everybody but me. 497 00:24:56,203 --> 00:24:58,997 -Honey, he just assumed you knew. -I did know. 498 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:00,749 -Well, we all knew. -No, I didn't 499 00:25:00,832 --> 00:25:02,709 Why am I the last to get the memo? 500 00:25:02,792 --> 00:25:04,461 [Helen] You're not. Larry is. 501 00:25:04,544 --> 00:25:07,088 He had one foot out the door by the time Paul was in high school. 502 00:25:07,172 --> 00:25:09,925 So, I thought, "I'm gonna let him find out by himself." 503 00:25:10,008 --> 00:25:14,387 You know, his only son, it's gonna drive that closed-minded, lying dickhead crazy. 504 00:25:14,471 --> 00:25:17,307 [irritable] Oh, Larry! Can we talk about something else? 505 00:25:17,390 --> 00:25:19,935 [Helen] Absolutely. How is Daniel? 506 00:25:20,101 --> 00:25:21,144 [Gillian] Ugh. 507 00:25:21,228 --> 00:25:23,939 It's worse than I imagined, and that's never happened to me before. 508 00:25:24,022 --> 00:25:25,607 -I under worry. -Hmm! 509 00:25:26,316 --> 00:25:28,735 Well, all the more reason for you to leave your hotel 510 00:25:28,818 --> 00:25:31,363 and move in like Helen and I did. 511 00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:33,698 Yeah, I'm in a hotel, too. 512 00:25:33,990 --> 00:25:34,866 What? 513 00:25:35,116 --> 00:25:38,995 Yes, I know what I said. But, you know, Paul's got his plate full 514 00:25:39,079 --> 00:25:41,289 and he doesn't need a house guest on top of it, you know? 515 00:25:41,373 --> 00:25:43,875 So, he forgot Mother's Day. Big deal. 516 00:25:43,959 --> 00:25:44,876 -Big deal? -Yeah. 517 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,170 What? You got me drunk and made me come here. 518 00:25:47,337 --> 00:25:48,588 But, seriously? 519 00:25:48,838 --> 00:25:51,508 How do you live in this town and forget Mother's Day? 520 00:25:51,591 --> 00:25:54,344 Look! Mother, mom, mama, mütter, madre, maman. 521 00:25:54,427 --> 00:25:55,554 [all laugh] 522 00:25:55,971 --> 00:25:57,222 [Helen] This is Joseph. 523 00:25:58,056 --> 00:25:59,724 Look at these cute bags. Let's go in. 524 00:25:59,808 --> 00:26:02,936 No. Paul does Joseph. He did these windows. 525 00:26:05,605 --> 00:26:08,400 I am so moving in with that fucker. 526 00:26:14,072 --> 00:26:17,158 Hi. Are you the famous writer? 527 00:26:17,242 --> 00:26:19,953 Either my mom exaggerated, or you're meeting someone else. 528 00:26:20,036 --> 00:26:21,121 I'm Alison. 529 00:26:21,580 --> 00:26:23,415 -Daniel. Hi. -Hello. 530 00:26:23,498 --> 00:26:26,167 You write for The New Yorker. That's, um, pretty famous. 531 00:26:26,251 --> 00:26:27,711 I don't write for The New Yorker. 532 00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:30,422 Oh, I thought your mom said that you did write for The New Yorker. 533 00:26:30,505 --> 00:26:33,466 The New Yorker published one short story of mine four years ago... 534 00:26:33,550 --> 00:26:34,384 -Yay! -...which... 535 00:26:35,260 --> 00:26:38,221 resulted in a very small book deal, but as of yet, no book. 536 00:26:38,305 --> 00:26:40,348 -Oh. -The rest of my work 537 00:26:40,432 --> 00:26:42,726 if you can call it that is in literary journals no one's ever heard of. 538 00:26:42,809 --> 00:26:44,853 -No, I might have heard of them. -No, you haven't. 539 00:26:44,936 --> 00:26:46,062 Come on, tell me. 540 00:26:46,938 --> 00:26:49,316 -The Willacoochee River Journal. -No. [laughs] 541 00:26:49,399 --> 00:26:51,192 -It's funny, right? -You're making that up. 542 00:26:51,276 --> 00:26:54,821 I wish I could make that up. Sadly, that is nonfiction. 543 00:26:54,946 --> 00:26:55,905 That is my life. 544 00:26:56,698 --> 00:26:57,907 My mom should talk less. 545 00:26:58,116 --> 00:27:00,619 Yeah, but if your mom talked less, we wouldn't be here right now. 546 00:27:00,702 --> 00:27:03,622 So, you know, thank God for your mother, right? [chuckles] 547 00:27:03,705 --> 00:27:04,748 [exhales deeply] 548 00:27:05,624 --> 00:27:06,458 [Alison chuckles] 549 00:27:06,541 --> 00:27:07,459 [Gillian] Daniel! 550 00:27:07,542 --> 00:27:10,503 [knocking at door] If you're there and you're pretending you're not, 551 00:27:10,587 --> 00:27:12,213 I'm never talking to you again. 552 00:27:12,505 --> 00:27:14,132 Or maybe that's what you want. 553 00:27:14,382 --> 00:27:15,675 -Daniel! -[banging at door] 554 00:27:17,886 --> 00:27:18,720 -[opens gate] -What? 555 00:27:19,387 --> 00:27:22,098 My God! This is totally unsafe. 556 00:27:24,392 --> 00:27:26,811 Oh, come on. It's open? 557 00:27:34,861 --> 00:27:37,989 Come on, old girl. You still got it. 558 00:27:38,782 --> 00:27:39,866 Okay. 559 00:27:41,242 --> 00:27:42,786 -[slams gate shut] -[breathes heavily] 560 00:27:43,912 --> 00:27:46,331 -[mice squeaking] -[squeals] Ah! Mice! 561 00:27:47,832 --> 00:27:49,000 [Andre] So, you lived in New York? 562 00:27:49,334 --> 00:27:52,420 Did I ever. I worked in fashion at the time. 563 00:27:52,504 --> 00:27:54,381 I met Paul's father at Studio 54. 564 00:27:54,839 --> 00:27:55,799 -No. -Yeah. 565 00:27:55,882 --> 00:27:57,008 Fabulous. 566 00:27:57,258 --> 00:27:58,718 Oh, yes, and ridiculous. 567 00:27:58,802 --> 00:28:00,887 You're supposed to have sex with people you meet there. 568 00:28:00,970 --> 00:28:03,473 -Do drugs with them, not marry them. -[laughs] 569 00:28:03,556 --> 00:28:05,934 I think Larry fell in love with me for my looks 570 00:28:06,017 --> 00:28:08,520 and just tolerated me for everything else. 571 00:28:09,104 --> 00:28:11,648 Does that sound terribly vain? 572 00:28:11,940 --> 00:28:15,193 Uh, look who you're talking to. I'm window dressing for a window dresser. 573 00:28:15,276 --> 00:28:16,236 [chuckles] 574 00:28:16,903 --> 00:28:18,279 But you two are happy? 575 00:28:19,823 --> 00:28:20,657 Yeah. 576 00:28:21,616 --> 00:28:23,952 [laughs] He says he'd like me 577 00:28:24,035 --> 00:28:26,496 to be older or flabbier so that when he leaves for work, 578 00:28:26,579 --> 00:28:28,790 he won't have to wonder if I'll be here when he gets home. 579 00:28:32,961 --> 00:28:35,422 Since when is Paul so insecure? 580 00:28:35,505 --> 00:28:36,548 [Andre] Mmm. 581 00:28:37,966 --> 00:28:39,759 -He gets that from you. -[Helen chuckles] 582 00:28:43,513 --> 00:28:44,681 You were... 583 00:28:45,348 --> 00:28:47,183 [stutters] You were preoccupied 584 00:28:47,559 --> 00:28:50,729 between husbands, dating, hosting charity events. 585 00:28:51,563 --> 00:28:52,647 I mean, look... 586 00:28:53,273 --> 00:28:55,066 you were hurt after the divorce. 587 00:28:55,942 --> 00:28:58,403 Right? Lost? I get that. 588 00:28:59,612 --> 00:29:01,364 But he felt a little abandoned. 589 00:29:05,535 --> 00:29:06,953 -Well, he never told me that. -[door opens, closes] 590 00:29:08,204 --> 00:29:09,080 [Paul] Hey. 591 00:29:11,124 --> 00:29:12,542 -Hey! -[Andre] There he is. 592 00:29:12,625 --> 00:29:13,752 -Hi. -Hey. 593 00:29:15,628 --> 00:29:16,838 Are you cooking? 594 00:29:16,921 --> 00:29:18,298 Well, yeah. Mm-hmm. 595 00:29:20,550 --> 00:29:22,635 [Alison] I was falling out of love with him, 596 00:29:22,719 --> 00:29:25,555 but really I thought I was falling out of love with myself, you know? 597 00:29:25,638 --> 00:29:28,057 -No, not really. -Oh, okay. 598 00:29:28,141 --> 00:29:29,976 Think of yourself as an egg. 599 00:29:30,185 --> 00:29:31,102 Okay, why? 600 00:29:31,186 --> 00:29:34,314 Because the egg is you, okay? It's your self-love, your self-worth. 601 00:29:34,439 --> 00:29:38,818 You're the egg, right? So, good love presses on the ends of you, 602 00:29:38,902 --> 00:29:40,945 but what happens when you press on the ends of an egg? 603 00:29:41,946 --> 00:29:42,781 I don't know. 604 00:29:43,239 --> 00:29:44,908 Nothing. Good love challenges the egg, 605 00:29:44,991 --> 00:29:47,744 it puts pressure on the egg, but it allows the egg to stay whole. 606 00:29:48,203 --> 00:29:51,372 But what does it take to turn a good love into bad love? 607 00:29:52,415 --> 00:29:53,708 An expiration date. 608 00:29:53,792 --> 00:29:56,503 No. No, no, no. The egg twists, okay? 609 00:29:56,586 --> 00:29:59,714 That's it. Now, suddenly, the pressure is on the sides of the egg. 610 00:29:59,839 --> 00:30:03,468 -Okay? And then, what happens? -We break the egg analogy? 611 00:30:03,551 --> 00:30:06,805 Oh, yeah, yeah. [chuckles] Yes, Daniel. It breaks all right. 612 00:30:07,430 --> 00:30:09,516 So, who broke your egg, Daniel? 613 00:30:12,811 --> 00:30:14,312 [Erin] I waited five weeks. 614 00:30:14,813 --> 00:30:17,106 -To bang your trainer? -Five weeks... 615 00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:18,942 without a word. 616 00:30:19,943 --> 00:30:22,278 I felt like you were happy for the chance to walk away. 617 00:30:23,613 --> 00:30:24,447 I came... 618 00:30:25,114 --> 00:30:26,574 to tell you that I decided. 619 00:30:27,534 --> 00:30:31,788 I always thought I had to finish my novel first, or make something of my life. 620 00:30:31,913 --> 00:30:33,331 Then I finally realized... 621 00:30:34,415 --> 00:30:35,834 all I ever wanted was you, 622 00:30:36,292 --> 00:30:38,169 and for us to be together, and... 623 00:30:39,546 --> 00:30:40,380 maybe we'll... 624 00:30:41,589 --> 00:30:42,924 one day have children. 625 00:30:44,425 --> 00:30:46,511 And that would be the purpose of our lives. 626 00:30:46,594 --> 00:30:48,221 The best thing we'd ever do. 627 00:30:52,725 --> 00:30:54,018 But I was wrong. 628 00:30:55,228 --> 00:30:56,396 -No. -[Alison] Daniel. 629 00:30:57,939 --> 00:30:59,065 Who broke your egg? 630 00:31:01,109 --> 00:31:04,112 -Okay, look... Alison. -Yep. 631 00:31:04,195 --> 00:31:05,697 I’m here to get rid of my mother, 632 00:31:05,780 --> 00:31:08,032 and you’re here to talk about your ex-husband. 633 00:31:08,199 --> 00:31:12,078 So, why don't we just call it over easy and be done with it? 634 00:31:12,161 --> 00:31:14,247 Okay, I'm going to give you an answer to that question, 635 00:31:14,330 --> 00:31:16,040 even though I don’t think 636 00:31:16,124 --> 00:31:18,585 you’ll understand it, and I definitely don't think you deserve it. 637 00:31:18,668 --> 00:31:20,336 -You're right, I don’t deserve it. -Okay. 638 00:31:20,712 --> 00:31:23,214 -You don't have to tell me. -Uh, you don't fix the egg. 639 00:31:23,298 --> 00:31:26,885 It doesn’t matter who twisted it. It’s broken. And you gotta let it go. 640 00:31:26,968 --> 00:31:30,430 And once you’ve truly bid that egg farewell, you’ll... 641 00:31:30,597 --> 00:31:31,848 you'll find a new egg. 642 00:31:33,933 --> 00:31:38,646 Thank you. That was, uh... I really just need the check right now. 643 00:31:38,730 --> 00:31:41,149 I don't think I can hear about the egg anymore, I'm sorry. 644 00:31:41,357 --> 00:31:43,568 All right, I was going to split the bill with you, 645 00:31:43,651 --> 00:31:46,487 but now I’m not so... thank you. 646 00:31:46,571 --> 00:31:49,490 -Fair. Good luck with your egg hunt. -Thank you. 647 00:31:54,203 --> 00:31:55,079 Well, [chuckles] 648 00:31:55,163 --> 00:31:58,583 I’m so glad we just finally get to sit down and have a meal together. 649 00:31:58,666 --> 00:32:01,252 -[Paul] Mm. -And... [laughs] 650 00:32:01,336 --> 00:32:04,380 did I mention that Paul has never officially come out to me? 651 00:32:05,465 --> 00:32:06,966 -[chuckles] -[Helen chuckles] 652 00:32:07,425 --> 00:32:08,509 Shame on you, Paul. 653 00:32:08,927 --> 00:32:11,846 You know, what is this bullshit about having to come out? 654 00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:14,724 It's not like straight people have to gather their families around the table 655 00:32:14,807 --> 00:32:17,936 when they’re 18 and find a way to break it to them they’re heterosexual, 656 00:32:18,019 --> 00:32:20,939 thank you, so... why is it any different for us? 657 00:32:21,439 --> 00:32:26,486 Why can’t parents just see what they see and figure it out for themselves? 658 00:32:26,569 --> 00:32:28,655 -[inhales deeply] No. -[Paul] It is not a sin. 659 00:32:28,738 --> 00:32:31,491 And it is not something I need to confess. 660 00:32:32,575 --> 00:32:35,161 Shut up and tell her. She deserves the truth. 661 00:32:35,286 --> 00:32:37,497 Do it now! This is really good, Helen. 662 00:32:37,580 --> 00:32:38,957 -[Helen] Aww. -[Paul scoffs] 663 00:32:40,625 --> 00:32:42,251 -Mom. -Yeah? 664 00:32:43,044 --> 00:32:44,003 I'm gay. 665 00:32:44,087 --> 00:32:47,882 [gasps] You’re what? I support you and I love you! 666 00:32:47,966 --> 00:32:50,510 [all cheering and clapping] 667 00:32:51,344 --> 00:32:52,804 All right, kiss her already. 668 00:32:52,887 --> 00:32:53,930 [gasps] 669 00:32:54,013 --> 00:32:55,682 -I'm not gonna go kiss her. -[Calvin] Get up. 670 00:32:55,765 --> 00:32:59,352 Walk over to your mother and kiss her the way you're supposed to. 671 00:32:59,894 --> 00:33:01,270 -Kiss. -[Paul] Here I come. 672 00:33:01,354 --> 00:33:02,355 Oh! 673 00:33:02,981 --> 00:33:04,107 [Calvin] Beautiful. 674 00:33:04,732 --> 00:33:07,193 [sighs deeply] You just made my night. 675 00:33:08,027 --> 00:33:10,321 Now, all you have to do is tell your father. 676 00:33:10,905 --> 00:33:12,907 Oh, I told him a long time ago. 677 00:33:13,783 --> 00:33:14,617 What? 678 00:33:16,035 --> 00:33:18,287 -Uh, I mean a while ago. -How long ago? 679 00:33:19,163 --> 00:33:21,416 [laughs] I don’t know. A few years. 680 00:33:25,253 --> 00:33:27,338 Why did you tell him and not me? 681 00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:30,174 [laughs nervously] I figured you knew. 682 00:33:31,926 --> 00:33:36,514 So... So, I’m punished for being perceptive? 683 00:33:36,597 --> 00:33:40,018 I would like to know why he got to have the conversation and I didn't? 684 00:33:40,101 --> 00:33:43,229 Mom, you just forced me to come out to three men who know I'm gay. 685 00:33:43,354 --> 00:33:45,815 There's no way that this moment wasn't going to be about you. 686 00:33:45,898 --> 00:33:49,527 So, maybe this is the exact reason why. 687 00:33:49,986 --> 00:33:53,072 [Helen] This has nothing to do with you coming out to me. 688 00:33:53,156 --> 00:33:56,034 It's just... [chuckles] It has nothing to do with that. 689 00:33:56,117 --> 00:33:59,328 This is about how you treat me and your father. 690 00:33:59,412 --> 00:34:02,081 I mean, is he always the one that's-- 691 00:34:02,165 --> 00:34:05,668 Mom, there is no you and my father. You're divorced! 692 00:34:07,170 --> 00:34:10,506 There’s me and him. And there is me and you. 693 00:34:10,923 --> 00:34:12,675 But there’s no you and him. 694 00:34:12,759 --> 00:34:15,053 And I'm not willing to be the you and the him, 695 00:34:15,136 --> 00:34:18,723 which is what you have always wanted, which is why you’re blowing up now. 696 00:34:18,806 --> 00:34:21,517 There is a me and him because there’s a you. 697 00:34:21,601 --> 00:34:24,228 And you... [angrily] You are just... 698 00:34:24,312 --> 00:34:26,481 -You are just like him! -[Miles] Helen-- 699 00:34:26,564 --> 00:34:29,442 You know what? Please don’t compare me to someone you despise, Mom. 700 00:34:29,525 --> 00:34:31,694 -How about that? -I gotta go make a phone call. 701 00:34:32,445 --> 00:34:33,488 Oh. 702 00:34:37,575 --> 00:34:40,578 [whispering] I'm gonna go ahead and take this with me. 703 00:34:41,454 --> 00:34:42,705 Am I interrupting? 704 00:34:42,997 --> 00:34:44,999 [Gillian] No, Daniel isn't home yet. 705 00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:46,959 Oh, neither is Matt. 706 00:34:47,627 --> 00:34:51,839 I feel like I’m being stood up, and all of Tribeca knows it. 707 00:34:51,964 --> 00:34:54,425 Ooh! These windows! 708 00:34:54,509 --> 00:34:57,261 Oh, stop complaining. I’m in a basement apartment. 709 00:34:57,345 --> 00:34:59,597 All I see are cockroaches and feet. 710 00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:01,682 [laughs] 711 00:35:01,766 --> 00:35:04,977 I'll call you later if there are any new developments. 712 00:35:05,061 --> 00:35:06,938 [Carol] All right. Good night. 713 00:35:07,021 --> 00:35:07,939 Bye. 714 00:35:08,564 --> 00:35:09,941 -[crying] I'm sorry. -Don't be sorry, 715 00:35:10,024 --> 00:35:11,651 -There's nothing to be sorry about. -I get emotional. 716 00:35:11,734 --> 00:35:14,195 I know, I know. Just give it a sec, okay? 717 00:35:15,822 --> 00:35:19,575 Andre said that I ruined your life [crying] 718 00:35:19,659 --> 00:35:21,494 -and you hate me for it! -That's... 719 00:35:21,577 --> 00:35:23,913 Helen! No, no, no! That's... No! 720 00:35:23,996 --> 00:35:26,874 -[Helen sobbing] Yeah. -No. I said... 721 00:35:26,999 --> 00:35:28,793 -When I was chopping cucumbers. -That's... 722 00:35:28,876 --> 00:35:32,338 I kind of said you have some abandonment issues because of her. That's all. 723 00:35:32,463 --> 00:35:34,507 That's... You told me... [sighs] 724 00:35:35,758 --> 00:35:37,218 -Okay. -[Helen exhales deeply] 725 00:35:38,094 --> 00:35:39,512 [Helen continues crying] 726 00:35:48,521 --> 00:35:49,355 Mom. 727 00:35:49,730 --> 00:35:50,940 [Helen tearfully] Yeah? 728 00:35:52,150 --> 00:35:53,025 Hey. 729 00:35:55,153 --> 00:35:55,987 Yeah? 730 00:35:56,362 --> 00:35:57,321 I love you. 731 00:35:59,657 --> 00:36:03,077 Mom... I would do anything for you. 732 00:36:03,161 --> 00:36:05,163 -Ah... -And you know that. 733 00:36:06,247 --> 00:36:09,333 I would like to stay here for a few nights if that's all right. 734 00:36:10,251 --> 00:36:12,670 -Oh, it's, um... -Oh! 735 00:36:12,837 --> 00:36:15,756 -Well, there's not really a guest room. -[crying] It's okay. 736 00:36:31,022 --> 00:36:32,440 [sighs] 737 00:36:37,028 --> 00:36:37,904 Plague? 738 00:36:39,447 --> 00:36:40,573 Ugh. 739 00:36:40,656 --> 00:36:42,617 ["Further" by Correatown playing] 740 00:36:42,700 --> 00:36:44,493 ♪ If I can't let this go ♪ 741 00:36:47,747 --> 00:36:49,874 ♪ I'm telling you ♪ 742 00:36:49,999 --> 00:36:54,170 ♪ I won't make it another year ♪ 743 00:36:55,046 --> 00:36:58,090 ♪ If I go all the way ♪ 744 00:37:01,844 --> 00:37:04,013 ♪ I'm telling you ♪ 745 00:37:04,138 --> 00:37:08,601 ♪ I can see all these things Coming clear ♪ 746 00:37:09,143 --> 00:37:12,313 ♪ If we go on like this ♪ 747 00:37:16,067 --> 00:37:18,110 ♪ I'm telling you ♪ 748 00:37:18,194 --> 00:37:22,406 ♪ We won't make it another year ♪ 749 00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:26,118 ♪ But if we go all the way... ♪ 750 00:37:29,664 --> 00:37:32,541 Matthew Walker... Dartmouth graduate. 751 00:37:32,625 --> 00:37:37,004 ♪ We'll finally see all these roads Coming clear ♪ 752 00:37:37,296 --> 00:37:39,006 ♪ 'Cause we have ♪ 753 00:37:39,924 --> 00:37:42,426 ♪ So much love ♪ 754 00:37:42,593 --> 00:37:46,097 ♪ But we need so much more 'Cause we have ♪ 755 00:37:47,098 --> 00:37:49,475 ♪ So much love ♪ 756 00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:52,520 ♪ But we need so much more ♪ 757 00:38:11,163 --> 00:38:13,332 [music fades out] 758 00:38:13,916 --> 00:38:15,918 -[elevator bell] -[door opens] 759 00:38:18,629 --> 00:38:20,631 [kissing and moaning] 760 00:38:25,761 --> 00:38:27,263 [girl] Something smells good. 761 00:38:27,388 --> 00:38:29,140 It smelled better at 6:00. 762 00:38:29,223 --> 00:38:32,268 Mom! You were supposed to be gone! 763 00:38:32,768 --> 00:38:33,894 [Carol] Who said that? 764 00:38:34,603 --> 00:38:36,397 I said, "Lock up when you leave." 765 00:38:36,939 --> 00:38:38,232 I didn't leave yet. 766 00:38:39,108 --> 00:38:41,777 Is this your, uh, girlfriend? 767 00:38:41,944 --> 00:38:43,821 This is Angel. 768 00:38:43,904 --> 00:38:46,157 Angel, this is Mom. 769 00:38:46,240 --> 00:38:48,909 -Hi. -How long have you two been together? 770 00:38:48,993 --> 00:38:49,869 A while. 771 00:38:49,952 --> 00:38:52,121 -Been together about four months now. -[gasps] 772 00:38:52,830 --> 00:38:56,667 [Carol] Oh, wow! Well, um, I'll make another plate. 773 00:38:56,751 --> 00:38:58,919 -No. You don't need to! -Thank you, Mrs. Walker. 774 00:38:59,003 --> 00:39:00,713 You don’t have to call her Mrs. Walker. 775 00:39:01,589 --> 00:39:03,841 Thank you... Mom? 776 00:39:04,342 --> 00:39:05,551 [chuckles] 777 00:39:05,843 --> 00:39:06,886 [Angel] Wow! 778 00:39:15,144 --> 00:39:16,437 [Daniel] How the hell... 779 00:39:17,438 --> 00:39:18,397 Did she... 780 00:39:25,363 --> 00:39:29,325 Unbelievable. She just... comes in and makes her... 781 00:39:35,331 --> 00:39:36,707 No boundaries. 782 00:39:39,418 --> 00:39:41,379 So, what do you do, Angel? 783 00:39:41,754 --> 00:39:43,631 Hmm. I’m still in school. 784 00:39:43,714 --> 00:39:46,842 Oh! Did Matt tell you that he went to Dartmouth? 785 00:39:46,926 --> 00:39:49,678 [Angel] No. [chuckles] That's amazing. 786 00:39:49,804 --> 00:39:50,721 Um... 787 00:39:51,263 --> 00:39:53,474 I might take a year off to travel before college. 788 00:39:53,557 --> 00:39:55,017 -Maybe go to Europe. -[Matt coughs] 789 00:39:58,229 --> 00:39:59,563 So, you're, um... 790 00:39:59,939 --> 00:40:01,190 still in high school. 791 00:40:01,482 --> 00:40:02,483 You were in a bar. 792 00:40:02,566 --> 00:40:04,235 -I’m 18. -You don't look it. 793 00:40:04,819 --> 00:40:06,904 -Next month. [giggles] -[Carol] Seventeen. 794 00:40:06,987 --> 00:40:08,447 You never said that you were 17. 795 00:40:08,531 --> 00:40:11,117 You've been dating for four months. You don't know how old she is? 796 00:40:11,409 --> 00:40:12,284 You forced me to lie. 797 00:40:12,368 --> 00:40:14,412 You make it sound like I can’t be in a long-term relation -- 798 00:40:14,495 --> 00:40:16,288 -I didn't force you-- -I just met her tonight, okay, Mom? 799 00:40:16,372 --> 00:40:18,249 She was with friends drinking, and I paid the bill. 800 00:40:18,332 --> 00:40:20,167 I didn’t go with you because you paid the bill. 801 00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:22,670 He asked me to model for his magazine. 802 00:40:22,753 --> 00:40:24,672 Yeah, because you said you were a model. 803 00:40:24,755 --> 00:40:27,258 I am. I used to model children’s clothing. 804 00:40:27,341 --> 00:40:30,136 Oh! When was that? Last year? 805 00:40:30,219 --> 00:40:32,471 I think that you should go. 806 00:40:33,514 --> 00:40:35,808 Would you make sure she gets into a cab, at least? 807 00:40:35,891 --> 00:40:38,060 You know what? I’d love to put you both in a cab. 808 00:40:38,644 --> 00:40:39,603 It was nice to meet you. 809 00:40:39,687 --> 00:40:41,021 Good night, Angel. 810 00:40:42,815 --> 00:40:45,192 Happy Birthday! Next month! 811 00:40:46,986 --> 00:40:47,862 No! 812 00:40:48,529 --> 00:40:50,531 [music] 813 00:41:06,005 --> 00:41:07,089 -Hey. -[Andre] Hi. 814 00:41:08,674 --> 00:41:09,592 Thank you. 815 00:41:11,677 --> 00:41:13,596 I wouldn't have yelled at her if she were my mom. 816 00:41:14,513 --> 00:41:16,724 -You hate your mom. -Because she yells at me. 817 00:41:17,224 --> 00:41:18,392 Okay. 818 00:41:20,644 --> 00:41:22,062 [exhales heavily] 819 00:41:22,730 --> 00:41:25,357 -I will write her a note of apology. -[Andre] Thank you. 820 00:41:25,441 --> 00:41:27,902 And I'll invite her to lunch where I’ll apologize again. 821 00:41:28,486 --> 00:41:31,530 She doesn’t really hear apologies the first time through, so... 822 00:41:32,406 --> 00:41:33,282 Thank you. 823 00:41:34,950 --> 00:41:37,453 Oh! Do we have a cross I can nail the note to? 824 00:41:37,536 --> 00:41:39,747 Please, just write the note. Please, just write it. 825 00:41:41,457 --> 00:41:43,459 [dishes clinking] 826 00:41:45,252 --> 00:41:46,587 Mom. Mom? 827 00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:51,800 -Mom, I said I have somebody for that. -No, you said you’d do it. 828 00:41:54,094 --> 00:41:57,306 -I’m sorry about last night. -Why are you sorry? 829 00:41:58,140 --> 00:42:00,809 -Because it was embarrassing. -No, it wasn’t embarrassing. 830 00:42:00,935 --> 00:42:03,604 Statutory rape, but let’s not argue semantics. 831 00:42:03,687 --> 00:42:06,357 It's never happened to me before. I mean, 17. 832 00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:08,317 -I’m not interested, Matt. -What? 833 00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:10,236 If you’re going to lie, I’m not interested. 834 00:42:10,319 --> 00:42:12,446 -I’m not lying. -I saw your magazine. 835 00:42:12,530 --> 00:42:15,699 -It is not about sports. -I never said that it was. 836 00:42:15,783 --> 00:42:19,245 You said it was a men’s magazine called All Balls. 837 00:42:19,328 --> 00:42:21,121 I was supposed to think scrotum? 838 00:42:21,205 --> 00:42:23,666 A) That is not a word I need to hear out of my mother's mouth. 839 00:42:23,749 --> 00:42:26,085 And B) You are not the demographic. 840 00:42:26,168 --> 00:42:29,255 Well, that much is clear. So, now I know the truth about you. 841 00:42:29,338 --> 00:42:32,383 My job has nothing to do with that girl being underage. Young... 842 00:42:32,466 --> 00:42:34,760 Younger than she has a right to be. 843 00:42:34,843 --> 00:42:37,638 -So, how old is she, do you think? -I don’t know, Mom. 844 00:42:37,721 --> 00:42:39,682 -Well, you're the editor. -I'm the art director. 845 00:42:39,974 --> 00:42:42,226 I design the look and the feel of All Balls. 846 00:42:43,435 --> 00:42:44,562 The magazine. 847 00:42:44,853 --> 00:42:46,480 So, it reflects your taste? 848 00:42:46,605 --> 00:42:48,274 It’s my job, Mom. 849 00:42:48,649 --> 00:42:50,192 A job that I’m very good at. 850 00:42:50,609 --> 00:42:52,611 To tailor the content to our audience. 851 00:42:52,695 --> 00:42:55,990 And our audience happens to be young men, and young men like young women. 852 00:42:56,740 --> 00:42:58,617 This is not a magazine for under the mattress. 853 00:42:58,701 --> 00:43:01,620 We are Vanity Fair with half the brain and twice the body. 854 00:43:01,704 --> 00:43:03,163 We are totally mainstream. 855 00:43:03,289 --> 00:43:06,000 Well, your father and I didn’t raise you to be mainstream. 856 00:43:06,250 --> 00:43:08,252 We raised you to be exceptional. 857 00:43:08,627 --> 00:43:11,213 -If your father were alive... -What, he'd be disappointed? 858 00:43:11,797 --> 00:43:14,383 Because, God forbid, I have to live up to his standards, right? 859 00:43:15,259 --> 00:43:16,427 But he’s not here, Mom. 860 00:43:17,219 --> 00:43:19,263 So, why are you still taking his side? 861 00:43:22,182 --> 00:43:23,726 What are you talking about? 862 00:43:25,728 --> 00:43:29,273 How come you never came to any of my basketball games? 863 00:43:31,275 --> 00:43:32,484 [sighs heavily] 864 00:43:32,693 --> 00:43:35,529 That was your time with your father. He was the coach. You were the star. 865 00:43:35,946 --> 00:43:39,116 I still have every trophy, and you have to know how proud I was 866 00:43:39,199 --> 00:43:41,744 -of every single win. -What about when we lost? 867 00:43:41,869 --> 00:43:44,538 -Well, you didn’t lose very often. -No, I didn't lose very often 868 00:43:44,622 --> 00:43:46,915 because according to Dad failure was not an option. 869 00:43:47,541 --> 00:43:48,917 But apparently, now, it is. 870 00:43:49,001 --> 00:43:52,379 -You are not a failure. -No, I know that I'm not a failure. 871 00:43:52,588 --> 00:43:53,922 So, why are you still lecturing me? 872 00:43:54,006 --> 00:43:56,425 I just want you to expect more from your life. 873 00:43:56,508 --> 00:43:59,094 Make the most of your time on this planet. 874 00:44:00,137 --> 00:44:02,431 I’m not the one who's still living in the same house. 875 00:44:03,098 --> 00:44:04,433 [exhales heavily] 876 00:44:09,021 --> 00:44:10,272 [knock at door] 877 00:44:11,273 --> 00:44:14,652 [Daniel] Ma, did you break in to my apartment and steal my vodka? 878 00:44:15,110 --> 00:44:16,654 [faster knocks at door] 879 00:44:17,029 --> 00:44:17,988 Vodka? 880 00:44:18,906 --> 00:44:19,907 That's crazy talk. 881 00:44:21,533 --> 00:44:24,411 Hey, we were supposed to have dinner. I baked you a pie. 882 00:44:24,495 --> 00:44:26,789 -I was on your date last night. -[door closes] 883 00:44:26,872 --> 00:44:28,749 What? How was it? 884 00:44:28,832 --> 00:44:31,043 I’d rather be bitten by the dog again. 885 00:44:31,543 --> 00:44:35,714 [scoffs] I had such hopes for that girl from Yonkers. 886 00:44:36,340 --> 00:44:39,510 You know, sometimes it's the second date when the magic happens. 887 00:44:48,644 --> 00:44:50,771 You want to meet me at the Met after work? 888 00:44:51,021 --> 00:44:52,106 [Matt] Uh, I can't. 889 00:44:52,606 --> 00:44:54,566 I have a party at One Oak tonight. 890 00:44:55,275 --> 00:44:57,945 A product launch for a shampoo/body wash. 891 00:44:58,237 --> 00:44:59,905 -Are mothers invited? -No. 892 00:45:00,447 --> 00:45:02,157 I mean, no, it's, uh... 893 00:45:03,117 --> 00:45:05,244 guest list only, and you've got to RSVP. 894 00:45:05,994 --> 00:45:06,912 [chuckles] 895 00:45:07,830 --> 00:45:08,997 It's not even a party. 896 00:45:09,832 --> 00:45:12,584 It’s work. And I shouldn’t have even said it was a party. 897 00:45:24,346 --> 00:45:26,765 It's good to see you, Mom. Love you! 898 00:45:27,725 --> 00:45:30,310 And if you decide to leave, just lock up. 899 00:45:30,394 --> 00:45:32,020 -[elevator bell] -Like I said. 900 00:45:32,855 --> 00:45:34,189 I'm not leaving. 901 00:45:35,399 --> 00:45:36,275 Okay. 902 00:45:39,987 --> 00:45:42,406 Look. Oh, it has little bees. 903 00:45:42,489 --> 00:45:46,118 [Helen] Oh, cute. My gosh, can you imagine? 904 00:45:48,120 --> 00:45:50,622 It's sort of just... What do we know about this party? 905 00:45:50,706 --> 00:45:53,709 -[Carol] There’s a list, apparently. -For a shampoo? 906 00:45:53,792 --> 00:45:56,628 Ugh! I feel naked. 907 00:45:56,712 --> 00:45:57,880 [gasps] 908 00:45:57,963 --> 00:45:59,673 [Helen] Where have you been hiding those? 909 00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:01,550 I try to de-emphasize. 910 00:46:01,633 --> 00:46:04,011 [Helen] Why? They’re spectacular. 911 00:46:04,094 --> 00:46:06,013 Oh, is this appropriate, you think? 912 00:46:06,096 --> 00:46:08,974 That dress, or crashing your son’s work party? 913 00:46:09,057 --> 00:46:12,186 [scoffs] Matt brought home a girl almost half his age. 914 00:46:12,269 --> 00:46:15,939 Well, Larry married a girl almost half his age. It's just what men do. 915 00:46:16,023 --> 00:46:17,733 -[all laugh] -[Carol] Oh... 916 00:46:17,858 --> 00:46:19,485 -[Gillian] How about these? -Mmm. 917 00:46:19,610 --> 00:46:21,779 Matt, he doesn't listen to me anymore. 918 00:46:22,362 --> 00:46:24,782 So, I’m trying to listen to him. 919 00:46:25,157 --> 00:46:29,286 I’m trying to understand his life here, support what he wants. 920 00:46:29,495 --> 00:46:31,038 Is that going too far? 921 00:46:31,121 --> 00:46:32,080 No. 922 00:46:32,664 --> 00:46:34,875 -That is admirable. -[Helen] Yes. 923 00:46:35,417 --> 00:46:39,546 You should go to that party, and you should wear this fabulous dress. 924 00:46:39,630 --> 00:46:42,049 -[chuckles] -And we should get your hair done. 925 00:46:42,132 --> 00:46:43,926 -[Carol] Oh! -[Helen laughs] 926 00:46:45,469 --> 00:46:46,637 That's her. 927 00:46:46,845 --> 00:46:49,348 -Okay, well, is she any good? -[Gillian] I don’t know. 928 00:46:49,431 --> 00:46:51,308 -[Helen] Carol it’s time. -Time for what? 929 00:46:51,391 --> 00:46:52,643 -A new look. -Yeah. 930 00:46:52,726 --> 00:46:55,229 Now, come on. I got to meet Paul for lunch at 1:00. 931 00:46:57,231 --> 00:46:58,732 -Hi, I'm Erin. -[Gillian] Oh! 932 00:46:59,024 --> 00:47:00,609 And I see you brought your girl-- Oh, my gosh. 933 00:47:01,151 --> 00:47:03,529 -Oh! [laughs nervously] -Mrs. Lieberman. 934 00:47:04,238 --> 00:47:05,989 [stutters] How crazy. 935 00:47:06,198 --> 00:47:10,410 Erin! Yes, it’s Gillian. And this is Carol and Helen. 936 00:47:10,494 --> 00:47:12,204 -Hi. [chuckles] -[Carol] Hello. 937 00:47:12,287 --> 00:47:14,581 -I... I know this is weird. -Yep. 938 00:47:14,665 --> 00:47:16,959 And I'm sorry. But it was Carol. 939 00:47:17,334 --> 00:47:18,961 -Carol wants a makeover. -No. 940 00:47:19,044 --> 00:47:22,548 No, I did not say "makeover," okay? [chuckles] 941 00:47:22,631 --> 00:47:25,008 Look, um, I'm going to a party tonight. 942 00:47:25,509 --> 00:47:26,802 But first things first, 943 00:47:26,885 --> 00:47:30,055 I need to know what is your experience with my texture of hair? 944 00:47:30,138 --> 00:47:33,141 -Oh, yeah. I do all types of hair. -See? 945 00:47:33,934 --> 00:47:36,520 [chuckles] You're the perfect stylist. 946 00:47:36,603 --> 00:47:37,437 Perfect. 947 00:47:37,980 --> 00:47:38,856 Okay. 948 00:47:39,189 --> 00:47:40,065 Okay. 949 00:47:40,816 --> 00:47:43,277 Right? [laughs] 950 00:47:43,986 --> 00:47:45,821 [Erin] Does Daniel know you’re here? 951 00:47:46,905 --> 00:47:48,991 Uh, no. This is all me. 952 00:47:49,074 --> 00:47:51,493 But I remember that you'd mentioned this salon 953 00:47:51,660 --> 00:47:53,620 when we had brunch that one time. 954 00:47:53,871 --> 00:47:57,749 Right, and then you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. 955 00:47:58,458 --> 00:47:59,334 Jesus. 956 00:48:00,002 --> 00:48:01,044 Did I? 957 00:48:01,628 --> 00:48:02,713 Eek! 958 00:48:02,838 --> 00:48:05,132 Oh! I'm so sorry. 959 00:48:05,215 --> 00:48:07,217 Anyhoo, I just... [clears throat] 960 00:48:08,010 --> 00:48:11,346 -Get Carol started. -Oh, no, no. No rush. 961 00:48:11,513 --> 00:48:12,973 Let's not cut angry. 962 00:48:13,056 --> 00:48:15,225 I'm sorry. Did I say that I'm sorry? 963 00:48:15,309 --> 00:48:18,437 Yeah, no, three times now. So, I think we're good. 964 00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:19,521 [chuckles] 965 00:48:20,147 --> 00:48:21,023 Okay. 966 00:48:21,565 --> 00:48:22,566 [Erin] So, Carol. 967 00:48:23,442 --> 00:48:24,860 -[Carol] Yes? -Are you open to a new shape? 968 00:48:25,611 --> 00:48:26,445 [Helen] She is. 969 00:48:26,612 --> 00:48:28,780 Well, nothing severe. 970 00:48:28,864 --> 00:48:32,618 You know, Finn always loved my hair just the way that it is, so... 971 00:48:32,701 --> 00:48:35,954 Well, you have a beautiful face. We should frame your face 972 00:48:37,122 --> 00:48:39,333 And I think we gotta rock these curls. 973 00:48:39,750 --> 00:48:41,752 [upbeat music] 974 00:48:42,377 --> 00:48:43,795 Hello! 975 00:48:49,051 --> 00:48:51,261 -[Helen] That's good. -You're my first cut. 976 00:48:51,345 --> 00:48:52,471 [all laugh] 977 00:48:53,597 --> 00:48:54,848 Okay, put your head back. 978 00:48:58,185 --> 00:48:59,186 What do you think? 979 00:48:59,269 --> 00:49:00,687 [both gasp] 980 00:49:01,063 --> 00:49:06,193 Oh, my gosh! If you looked any younger, Matt would date you. 981 00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:07,986 -[laughs] -[Gillian] You’re a miracle worker. 982 00:49:08,612 --> 00:49:10,113 -No. -Really? Was it that tired? 983 00:49:10,197 --> 00:49:11,657 [all laugh] 984 00:49:12,240 --> 00:49:13,951 Erin, thank you. I love it. 985 00:49:14,034 --> 00:49:15,452 I just helped you be you. 986 00:49:15,535 --> 00:49:16,787 [chuckles] 987 00:49:18,372 --> 00:49:21,750 Look, Erin, I really have to apologize. 988 00:49:21,833 --> 00:49:22,668 Again? 989 00:49:22,751 --> 00:49:25,879 Yes, again. I should have tried harder before. 990 00:49:25,963 --> 00:49:28,799 Listen, maybe I could take you and Daniel out to lunch, 991 00:49:28,882 --> 00:49:30,759 or maybe you could do my hair? 992 00:49:30,842 --> 00:49:33,762 Now, you volunteer. Thank you. 993 00:49:34,554 --> 00:49:36,473 No, I'm actually moving next week. 994 00:49:36,556 --> 00:49:38,183 What? Why? Where? 995 00:49:38,266 --> 00:49:42,145 My friend has a salon in Los Angeles, so, I’m gonna try the other coast. 996 00:49:42,229 --> 00:49:46,066 But it was so good to see you again. And enjoy your party, Carol. 997 00:49:46,149 --> 00:49:48,652 [laughs] Well, how can I not now? 998 00:49:48,735 --> 00:49:50,654 -Thank you. -Nice to meet you, Erin. 999 00:49:50,737 --> 00:49:51,989 How is he? 1000 00:49:53,115 --> 00:49:54,157 He's, uh... 1001 00:49:54,574 --> 00:49:57,744 Yeah, well, you know, been better. 1002 00:49:58,662 --> 00:49:59,538 With you... 1003 00:50:00,205 --> 00:50:01,164 he was better. 1004 00:50:02,332 --> 00:50:03,542 Till I broke his heart. 1005 00:50:06,336 --> 00:50:07,587 But he broke mine first. 1006 00:50:08,964 --> 00:50:10,090 So, we’re even. 1007 00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:12,676 He did. 1008 00:50:18,557 --> 00:50:20,017 One thing I do know, 1009 00:50:20,475 --> 00:50:23,979 the problem is not that I meddled, it's that I should've meddled sooner. 1010 00:50:24,062 --> 00:50:26,273 Mm-mmm. I wouldn’t tell him that. 1011 00:50:26,606 --> 00:50:28,817 -[chuckles] -There’s Paul. There's Paul. 1012 00:50:30,736 --> 00:50:32,404 Look at him. He's so handsome. 1013 00:50:32,946 --> 00:50:35,240 We're not even here. Go enjoy your apology. 1014 00:50:36,950 --> 00:50:38,827 -[Helen] Hi. -[Carol] I don't want him to see us. 1015 00:50:38,910 --> 00:50:41,246 [Gillian] We're middle-aged women in Manhattan. We're practically invisible. 1016 00:50:41,329 --> 00:50:43,331 [Helen chuckles] Oh. 1017 00:50:43,957 --> 00:50:44,833 Thank you. 1018 00:50:46,376 --> 00:50:47,294 Thank you. 1019 00:50:48,420 --> 00:50:51,757 -You were so thoughtful with the note. -Oh. 1020 00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:53,341 Was that Andre's idea? 1021 00:50:53,425 --> 00:50:54,843 [sighs] 1022 00:50:55,469 --> 00:50:56,386 -Excuse me. -Yes? 1023 00:50:56,553 --> 00:50:59,556 I'm gonna have what she's having. Without the taunting. [laughs] 1024 00:51:01,224 --> 00:51:02,350 Listen, I'm... 1025 00:51:02,434 --> 00:51:05,854 really sorry I attacked you last night about Dad. 1026 00:51:08,356 --> 00:51:09,816 Yeah. Okay. 1027 00:51:10,067 --> 00:51:11,610 -Yes. -Sorry. 1028 00:51:12,694 --> 00:51:13,695 Um... 1029 00:51:14,529 --> 00:51:17,908 it's just not my problem if you can't let go. 1030 00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:22,120 Oh, I usually get the fish. 1031 00:51:22,746 --> 00:51:24,039 [Carol] Aww. 1032 00:51:24,873 --> 00:51:27,167 -So... -What do you mean I can't let go? 1033 00:51:28,919 --> 00:51:30,504 I'm just saying that's the issue. 1034 00:51:30,587 --> 00:51:33,173 [chuckles] Well, you’re absolutely wrong. 1035 00:51:33,340 --> 00:51:36,176 I am happily married to someone I am in love with. 1036 00:51:36,259 --> 00:51:38,470 I will believe anything you tell me. 1037 00:51:38,553 --> 00:51:41,515 Please stop patronizing me. Thank you. 1038 00:51:41,598 --> 00:51:43,016 -[waitress] Enjoy. -Thanks. 1039 00:51:44,559 --> 00:51:47,104 I’m not patronizing. I’m apologizing. 1040 00:51:47,187 --> 00:51:50,315 So, accusing me of having a sham marriage is what you call an apology? 1041 00:51:50,398 --> 00:51:52,567 I’m not accusing you of anything. 1042 00:51:52,651 --> 00:51:54,861 -I’m just trying to apologize. -[chuckles] 1043 00:51:54,945 --> 00:51:57,197 You know, it's what you always do. 1044 00:51:57,280 --> 00:51:59,658 You always make some outrageous accusation 1045 00:51:59,741 --> 00:52:02,035 and then you act as if I’m being hypersensitive 1046 00:52:02,119 --> 00:52:03,495 to notice that you’ve said it. 1047 00:52:03,578 --> 00:52:06,957 - Ahh. -[Paul] It's a tiny observation. 1048 00:52:07,124 --> 00:52:08,792 It's something that was obvious to me. 1049 00:52:09,209 --> 00:52:10,794 Mom, if I was wrong, you wouldn't be so upset. 1050 00:52:10,877 --> 00:52:13,088 Mom! Oh, my... 1051 00:52:13,213 --> 00:52:14,756 -We should go. -[Paul] Don't-- 1052 00:52:15,340 --> 00:52:16,967 -[exhales heavily] -[Gillian] We should go! 1053 00:52:17,926 --> 00:52:19,928 You should be ashamed of yourself. 1054 00:52:20,762 --> 00:52:22,055 Carol Walker? 1055 00:52:26,101 --> 00:52:28,145 Oh. [chuckles] Oh. 1056 00:52:28,770 --> 00:52:29,813 Gillian Lieberman. 1057 00:52:30,981 --> 00:52:33,483 I don’t know why she didn’t tell you that we're in town, 1058 00:52:33,567 --> 00:52:36,361 but I certainly wouldn't use the word "conspiracy." 1059 00:52:36,444 --> 00:52:39,865 [Helen] My feelings, or lack of them, toward my husband and my ex-husband, 1060 00:52:39,948 --> 00:52:42,951 -are really none of your business. -I didn't say they were. 1061 00:52:43,118 --> 00:52:44,786 -That was meant for me. -Oh. 1062 00:52:45,036 --> 00:52:46,997 And you have no place speculating 1063 00:52:47,080 --> 00:52:50,458 on what I may or may not be thinking or feeling, 1064 00:52:50,542 --> 00:52:54,379 Especially when your speculations are inaccurate and deeply hurtful. 1065 00:52:54,462 --> 00:52:55,964 You are absolutely right. 1066 00:52:56,047 --> 00:52:57,174 Subject closed. 1067 00:52:57,257 --> 00:52:58,508 -[Paul] Thank God. -Yeah. 1068 00:52:58,592 --> 00:53:01,052 I think Carol and I should get going now. 1069 00:53:01,136 --> 00:53:03,722 Well, there's one more thing I wanted to tell you. 1070 00:53:03,805 --> 00:53:06,558 Just... get everything out on the table. 1071 00:53:06,641 --> 00:53:09,561 Didn't want you to hear it from somebody else or somebody else's son. 1072 00:53:09,644 --> 00:53:12,397 Or if I even needed to tell you 'cause it doesn't really involve you. 1073 00:53:12,647 --> 00:53:14,149 Just, come on, spit it out. [chuckles] 1074 00:53:14,649 --> 00:53:16,860 I... might not... 1075 00:53:18,612 --> 00:53:19,905 have children of my own. 1076 00:53:20,697 --> 00:53:21,781 That much I figured. 1077 00:53:21,865 --> 00:53:23,575 Gay people have children all the time, Mom. 1078 00:53:23,658 --> 00:53:25,952 -Do you want children? -No, I do not. 1079 00:53:26,036 --> 00:53:28,246 The point is that gay men have... 1080 00:53:28,788 --> 00:53:31,750 sperm, and lesbians have wombs and we don’t need straight people 1081 00:53:31,833 --> 00:53:34,878 -to tell us what we can or can’t do. -What? 1082 00:53:36,254 --> 00:53:37,505 This is why I didn’t tell you. 1083 00:53:37,964 --> 00:53:41,343 You are too young to make a decision like this. 1084 00:53:41,426 --> 00:53:44,095 -A decision like what? -Two mommies and a sperm-daddy. 1085 00:53:44,179 --> 00:53:47,098 -Right? -Mom, what I’m saying is... 1086 00:53:47,557 --> 00:53:52,229 if I lent my sperm to two women that I knew and trusted, 1087 00:53:52,437 --> 00:53:55,941 then I would know that the child would be loved and cared for-- 1088 00:53:56,024 --> 00:53:59,194 Are you saying you weren't loved? Are you trying to make me feel guilty? 1089 00:53:59,277 --> 00:54:01,029 This has nothing to do with you. 1090 00:54:01,112 --> 00:54:03,823 -This is about me! -And the gift you're giving your friends? 1091 00:54:03,907 --> 00:54:06,493 Yes. The gift I am giving my friends, which I feel good about 1092 00:54:06,576 --> 00:54:08,453 because I love them, and they love the baby. 1093 00:54:08,536 --> 00:54:09,537 -[gasps] -[gasps] 1094 00:54:09,621 --> 00:54:10,538 [gasps] Oh. 1095 00:54:13,750 --> 00:54:15,252 -[Helen] Did he say "baby"? -You have a baby? 1096 00:54:15,335 --> 00:54:16,920 There's a baby? 1097 00:54:17,212 --> 00:54:18,838 What did you think we were talking about? 1098 00:54:19,297 --> 00:54:22,759 [raised voice] Sperm! I thought we were talking about sperm! 1099 00:54:22,842 --> 00:54:26,221 A baby takes nine months. You've kept this from me for nine months? 1100 00:54:26,304 --> 00:54:29,891 -Mom, the more of a scene-- -This has been a lovely lunch, 1101 00:54:29,975 --> 00:54:32,143 even though we didn’t have lunch. So don't get up. 1102 00:54:32,227 --> 00:54:34,813 Please, just sit there and have more... not your children, 1103 00:54:34,896 --> 00:54:36,731 so I can have more not my grandchildren 1104 00:54:36,815 --> 00:54:38,441 And we can get together for the holidays 1105 00:54:38,525 --> 00:54:40,485 and have one big, not-happy, not-a-family, 1106 00:54:40,568 --> 00:54:43,196 because I’m not a mother anymore, I’m an other. 1107 00:54:43,321 --> 00:54:44,990 -And now I am not a grandmother... -What is... 1108 00:54:45,073 --> 00:54:46,866 ...I’m a grand-other! 1109 00:54:47,784 --> 00:54:50,161 -[Gillian] Helen, sweetie. -Your hair looks very nice, Carol. 1110 00:54:50,245 --> 00:54:51,454 Well, thank you, Paul. 1111 00:54:51,705 --> 00:54:54,291 But that was not an apology. 1112 00:54:57,335 --> 00:54:58,169 [Carol] Helen! 1113 00:54:59,838 --> 00:55:00,672 [Helen crying] 1114 00:55:00,755 --> 00:55:03,258 I thought you didn’t want to be a grandmother. 1115 00:55:03,341 --> 00:55:07,345 [crying] Well, I just don't want things to be taken away from me. 1116 00:55:07,846 --> 00:55:08,680 I mean, 1117 00:55:09,222 --> 00:55:11,933 now someone else gets my grandchild. 1118 00:55:12,225 --> 00:55:14,978 Just like someone else got my husband. 1119 00:55:15,895 --> 00:55:17,689 How did this become about Larry? 1120 00:55:18,064 --> 00:55:20,692 Because divorce is not fair. 1121 00:55:21,526 --> 00:55:25,363 Divorce is great for men. They get someone younger, 1122 00:55:25,739 --> 00:55:27,073 thinner, better, 1123 00:55:27,324 --> 00:55:31,870 [stutters] and women get someone older and fatter with thinner hair! 1124 00:55:31,953 --> 00:55:33,955 -[phone beeps] -Sure. 1125 00:55:34,956 --> 00:55:36,708 [Gillian] I got a text from Daniel. 1126 00:55:38,001 --> 00:55:40,545 "Stop calling me." Ugh. 1127 00:55:41,713 --> 00:55:42,881 What should I reply? 1128 00:55:42,964 --> 00:55:44,799 Please, don’t reply. 1129 00:55:45,091 --> 00:55:46,134 Let's just... 1130 00:55:46,634 --> 00:55:49,471 Let's just go home before we do any more damage. 1131 00:55:49,679 --> 00:55:51,765 [Gillian] No. Carol. 1132 00:55:51,848 --> 00:55:54,851 You and your boobs are going out. And I don’t mean me and Helen. 1133 00:55:54,934 --> 00:55:57,812 Yeah. Carol, you go out and have fun. 1134 00:55:59,147 --> 00:56:02,650 [tearfully] I wish Larry had died on me, too. 1135 00:56:06,905 --> 00:56:09,574 You should think more about what you say 1136 00:56:10,116 --> 00:56:11,618 and less about what you feel. 1137 00:56:12,243 --> 00:56:13,661 So sorry. 1138 00:56:16,039 --> 00:56:17,791 [tearfully] What did I say? 1139 00:56:19,084 --> 00:56:20,835 -What? -Really? 1140 00:56:21,169 --> 00:56:23,922 -[muffled techno music] -[indistinct chatter] 1141 00:56:27,675 --> 00:56:29,469 Oh, hi. Excuse me. 1142 00:56:30,053 --> 00:56:31,012 Um... 1143 00:56:31,638 --> 00:56:33,723 I'm a guest of Matt Walker. 1144 00:56:34,140 --> 00:56:35,558 Do you have him on the list? 1145 00:56:36,643 --> 00:56:37,894 He's All Balls. 1146 00:56:38,353 --> 00:56:39,437 Uh, the magazine. 1147 00:56:40,522 --> 00:56:43,191 -It's a magazine. -Yeah. I know Matt. 1148 00:56:43,650 --> 00:56:46,152 Uh, he's already checked in. He doesn't have a plus one. 1149 00:56:46,236 --> 00:56:49,656 Oh! I'm his mother. Carol Walker. 1150 00:56:49,739 --> 00:56:52,325 I have a driver's license. [chuckles] [squeals] 1151 00:56:53,118 --> 00:56:55,078 -Um, there. -[hostess] Oh. 1152 00:56:55,161 --> 00:56:58,415 Oh! And a picture of Matt in the tub when he was three. 1153 00:56:58,581 --> 00:57:00,750 Ah! Does he have a woody? 1154 00:57:01,709 --> 00:57:05,171 [gasps] Oh, no! That's a toy boat. 1155 00:57:05,255 --> 00:57:07,006 Oh, my God. 1156 00:57:09,259 --> 00:57:10,468 [camera clicks] 1157 00:57:10,552 --> 00:57:12,220 -[Carol chuckles] -It's for Instagram. 1158 00:57:12,720 --> 00:57:13,596 Oh! 1159 00:57:14,681 --> 00:57:15,682 She's good. 1160 00:57:15,765 --> 00:57:17,475 ["Like An Animal" by Rüfüs Du Sol] 1161 00:57:17,559 --> 00:57:22,439 ♪ How long Have I been on a hunt for you? ♪ 1162 00:57:25,066 --> 00:57:27,152 ♪ No sound ♪ 1163 00:57:27,402 --> 00:57:30,363 ♪ Of anything that I can do ♪ 1164 00:57:31,281 --> 00:57:33,616 ♪ But I don't mind ♪ 1165 00:57:33,908 --> 00:57:38,163 ♪ I don't mind 'Cause there's nothing left to lose ♪ 1166 00:57:39,122 --> 00:57:41,833 ♪ For the first time ♪ 1167 00:57:41,916 --> 00:57:45,962 ♪ The first time I'm calling out for you ♪ 1168 00:57:46,254 --> 00:57:47,088 Okay. 1169 00:57:47,172 --> 00:57:49,174 ♪ Like an animal ♪ 1170 00:57:50,925 --> 00:57:53,011 Excuse me. Excuse me. 1171 00:57:54,804 --> 00:57:57,807 ♪ And I'm coming home ♪ 1172 00:57:58,850 --> 00:58:00,852 ♪ I'm coming home for you... ♪ 1173 00:58:01,352 --> 00:58:02,187 [shouts] 1174 00:58:03,813 --> 00:58:07,275 [nervously] Ohh! I ruined your dress. I'm so sorry. 1175 00:58:07,484 --> 00:58:09,861 -I never liked this dress. -Oh, it's all my fault. 1176 00:58:10,361 --> 00:58:11,488 I was running from my son. 1177 00:58:12,739 --> 00:58:14,824 -I'm Julia. -[Carol groaning] 1178 00:58:15,408 --> 00:58:17,160 Carol. Walker. 1179 00:58:17,243 --> 00:58:19,329 Why are you running from your son? 1180 00:58:20,038 --> 00:58:21,706 He told me I couldn't come. 1181 00:58:22,207 --> 00:58:24,709 -That's not nice. -Oh, maybe it was. 1182 00:58:24,792 --> 00:58:27,337 Maybe he knew everyone here would be 30 years younger, 1183 00:58:27,420 --> 00:58:30,381 and I would feel like the last dinosaur. [chuckles] 1184 00:58:31,508 --> 00:58:34,594 -Well, thank you, Damon. Thank you. -[Damon] You're very welcome. 1185 00:58:36,054 --> 00:58:39,224 [sighs] Damon, Damon, Damon. [giggles] 1186 00:58:39,432 --> 00:58:42,769 Hey! Hey, hey, hey. Would a grandma wear these? 1187 00:58:42,894 --> 00:58:45,647 No. Especially not to bed. 1188 00:58:45,730 --> 00:58:49,067 We are not going to bed, we are going clubbing. 1189 00:58:49,651 --> 00:58:52,403 I didn’t go clubbing when I was supposed to go clubbing. 1190 00:58:52,487 --> 00:58:54,072 Would we even get into a club? 1191 00:58:54,155 --> 00:58:57,283 Well, I didn’t think I’d get into these jeans and look at me now. 1192 00:58:57,367 --> 00:58:59,494 -[Gillian] Can you breathe? -[Helen] Sporadically. 1193 00:58:59,577 --> 00:59:02,080 [Helen laughing] Come on. Let's go downstairs. 1194 00:59:02,163 --> 00:59:04,624 This hotel is supposed to be a huge party scene. 1195 00:59:04,707 --> 00:59:06,209 Just call for a bellboy. 1196 00:59:06,334 --> 00:59:09,462 One's more gorgeous than the next, and they come to you. 1197 00:59:09,546 --> 00:59:12,131 I know. You’ve called for ice twice. 1198 00:59:12,215 --> 00:59:13,800 Just fuck one of them already. 1199 00:59:13,883 --> 00:59:15,677 What? I'm thirsty. 1200 00:59:15,843 --> 00:59:20,181 Come on, we are in New York City. Let's go. 1201 00:59:20,890 --> 00:59:22,809 [Gillian] Okay. Let me take a shower. 1202 00:59:23,142 --> 00:59:24,352 Yes! 1203 00:59:24,477 --> 00:59:25,687 I think this might be him. 1204 00:59:25,770 --> 00:59:27,981 Is he the most handsome guy in the room? 1205 00:59:29,023 --> 00:59:30,024 He's got swagger. 1206 00:59:30,108 --> 00:59:32,110 ["Rockabye" by Clean Bandit playing in background] 1207 00:59:33,778 --> 00:59:35,363 That's him. [chuckles] 1208 00:59:35,655 --> 00:59:37,282 I can’t talk to him right now. 1209 00:59:37,699 --> 00:59:41,202 Matt... has never seen me drunk. 1210 00:59:41,286 --> 00:59:42,495 [chuckles] 1211 00:59:42,745 --> 00:59:46,708 So, tell me more about this non-profit that you're working with. 1212 00:59:46,791 --> 00:59:48,126 It's called micro lending. 1213 00:59:48,334 --> 00:59:51,546 We provide small loans for the world's poorest of the poor. 1214 00:59:51,713 --> 00:59:54,924 Mostly women. So they can work their own way out of poverty. 1215 00:59:55,425 --> 00:59:58,845 I want you to give my son a child. [laughs] 1216 01:00:00,430 --> 01:00:01,347 Oh! 1217 01:00:02,140 --> 01:00:05,685 Matt, he may seem vain and superficial, 1218 01:00:05,768 --> 01:00:10,648 and so afraid of any real emotion that it makes you cry. 1219 01:00:11,441 --> 01:00:14,110 But he's basically good. 1220 01:00:14,902 --> 01:00:19,073 He has it in him to be a really good man. 1221 01:00:20,116 --> 01:00:24,787 I need you to show him how to be that man. 1222 01:00:27,248 --> 01:00:29,167 I think we should get you home. 1223 01:00:29,292 --> 01:00:31,252 [gasps] Let's dance. 1224 01:00:31,336 --> 01:00:34,172 I used to love to dance. 1225 01:00:34,255 --> 01:00:36,924 [hip hop music] 1226 01:00:40,720 --> 01:00:43,222 Matt's dad used to take me dancing. 1227 01:00:44,140 --> 01:00:47,185 He's dead now. That's why he stopped. 1228 01:00:52,023 --> 01:00:53,232 -[Matt] Mom! -[gasps] 1229 01:00:53,900 --> 01:00:54,817 What are you-- 1230 01:00:55,485 --> 01:00:58,279 What is all this? What happened to your hair? 1231 01:00:58,363 --> 01:01:00,615 And mom, you did not have those this morning. 1232 01:01:01,658 --> 01:01:02,659 Oh, Matt... 1233 01:01:03,701 --> 01:01:05,953 I’m in love with Julia! [laughs] 1234 01:01:07,330 --> 01:01:10,166 I love her. I think you might, too. 1235 01:01:13,044 --> 01:01:16,339 Okay, let go of her hand. She is my mother. 1236 01:01:16,422 --> 01:01:18,966 Dancing does not make you a lesbian. 1237 01:01:19,175 --> 01:01:21,844 Your dad liked lesbians, by the way. 1238 01:01:22,136 --> 01:01:24,305 I found his videos after he died. 1239 01:01:24,389 --> 01:01:27,433 Please, please, stop talking. And dancing. 1240 01:01:27,517 --> 01:01:30,770 Let's... You know what? Let's just get you into a cab. 1241 01:01:30,853 --> 01:01:33,773 You get into a cab! I’m having dessert. 1242 01:01:35,316 --> 01:01:37,985 Ohh! I might stay out all night. 1243 01:01:38,444 --> 01:01:40,238 I may drink from a shoe. 1244 01:01:41,280 --> 01:01:43,741 I was a girl before I was your mother. 1245 01:01:45,702 --> 01:01:49,455 All right, does this outfit work? I mean outside of Poughkeepsie. 1246 01:01:49,997 --> 01:01:51,124 [Helen snoring] 1247 01:01:51,958 --> 01:01:53,793 -[Gillian sighs] -[phone rings] 1248 01:01:58,965 --> 01:02:00,425 -Hey. -[Carol] Gillian, oh! 1249 01:02:00,967 --> 01:02:02,427 I need my friends. 1250 01:02:03,428 --> 01:02:06,389 -He barely recognized me. -[Gillian] Because of your new look? 1251 01:02:06,472 --> 01:02:08,933 No! Because I was having fun! 1252 01:02:09,016 --> 01:02:11,602 -That’s what we were supposed to do. -You passed out. 1253 01:02:11,686 --> 01:02:14,105 By the way, you have incredible new beauty products. 1254 01:02:14,188 --> 01:02:15,940 Yeah. It’s all anti-aging. 1255 01:02:16,023 --> 01:02:18,192 Why is everyone anti-aging? 1256 01:02:18,276 --> 01:02:21,070 You know what’s anti-aging? Death. 1257 01:02:21,154 --> 01:02:22,864 Let's be happy we're aging. 1258 01:02:22,947 --> 01:02:23,781 -Yeah. -Yeah. 1259 01:02:23,865 --> 01:02:25,032 [Carol] By the way, 1260 01:02:25,116 --> 01:02:29,245 do you know how long it’s been since I have had-- 1261 01:02:29,328 --> 01:02:30,163 Sex? 1262 01:02:30,496 --> 01:02:32,498 I was gonna say pizza. 1263 01:02:32,582 --> 01:02:33,583 Oh. [chuckles] 1264 01:02:33,666 --> 01:02:34,876 Oh. 1265 01:02:35,585 --> 01:02:36,961 [moaning] 1266 01:02:37,044 --> 01:02:38,379 -Wow. -[all laugh] 1267 01:02:39,046 --> 01:02:40,590 I’m not going home tonight. 1268 01:02:41,090 --> 01:02:42,508 I mean, Matt's home. 1269 01:02:43,009 --> 01:02:44,135 I'm on vacation. 1270 01:02:44,218 --> 01:02:46,971 -So, we’re done with the mission? -[Carol] Mm, we have a new mission. 1271 01:02:48,097 --> 01:02:49,599 Dance till dawn. 1272 01:02:49,682 --> 01:02:51,058 [laughs] 1273 01:02:51,934 --> 01:02:53,478 Did we fail the first mission? 1274 01:02:53,936 --> 01:02:56,814 -Fuck the first mission! -[Gillian] What about the boys? 1275 01:02:57,148 --> 01:02:58,691 Fuck the boys! 1276 01:02:58,775 --> 01:02:59,901 -[laughs] -Wow! 1277 01:02:59,984 --> 01:03:03,488 -[Helen] Man, I love the new Carol! Yes! -[Gillian laughing] 1278 01:03:03,571 --> 01:03:05,531 [all three screaming and cheering] 1279 01:03:05,615 --> 01:03:07,283 ["Just Our Style" playing] 1280 01:03:07,366 --> 01:03:09,702 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1281 01:03:10,369 --> 01:03:12,455 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1282 01:03:12,538 --> 01:03:16,083 ♪ Heartbeat, rewind Turned up, amplified ♪ 1283 01:03:16,167 --> 01:03:19,712 ♪ We can do it how we like Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1284 01:03:19,796 --> 01:03:23,216 ♪ Bang bang, young drunk Cheap thrills, big love ♪ 1285 01:03:23,299 --> 01:03:25,426 ♪ Do what makes us feel alive ♪ 1286 01:03:25,927 --> 01:03:27,261 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1287 01:03:27,345 --> 01:03:29,931 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh ♪ 1288 01:03:30,431 --> 01:03:32,725 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh ♪ 1289 01:03:32,809 --> 01:03:36,145 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1290 01:03:36,270 --> 01:03:39,982 ♪ Like a super sonic boom Love the way we're coming through... ♪ 1291 01:03:40,399 --> 01:03:41,275 One more. 1292 01:03:41,901 --> 01:03:43,402 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1293 01:03:43,486 --> 01:03:46,864 ♪ And we're shooting for the sky Living young and running wild ♪ 1294 01:03:46,948 --> 01:03:49,283 ♪ That's just our style ♪ 1295 01:03:50,576 --> 01:03:51,869 [Helen] Get it, girl. Get it! 1296 01:03:53,246 --> 01:03:55,206 -One, two, three. -[laughing loudly] 1297 01:03:55,289 --> 01:03:58,668 ♪ Black west, sparks fly Light the fuse, electrify ♪ 1298 01:03:58,751 --> 01:04:02,672 ♪ We can do it how we like Whoa, oh, oh... ♪ 1299 01:04:03,214 --> 01:04:06,050 -[screams] -[whoops] 1300 01:04:06,342 --> 01:04:08,511 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh ♪ 1301 01:04:08,594 --> 01:04:11,514 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1302 01:04:11,597 --> 01:04:13,599 ♪ Like a super sonic boom Love the way... ♪ 1303 01:04:13,891 --> 01:04:15,476 [all laughing and screaming] 1304 01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:18,896 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1305 01:04:18,980 --> 01:04:22,358 ♪ And we're shooting for the sky Living young and running wild ♪ 1306 01:04:22,441 --> 01:04:24,861 ♪ That's just our style Oh, oh ♪ 1307 01:04:24,944 --> 01:04:27,864 [indistinct chattering and laughter] 1308 01:04:29,949 --> 01:04:32,952 ♪ That's just our style Hey ♪ 1309 01:04:33,035 --> 01:04:35,037 [knock at door] 1310 01:04:38,499 --> 01:04:40,543 -[knocking continues] -Yeah. 1311 01:04:47,633 --> 01:04:49,135 Oh, it's you. 1312 01:04:50,303 --> 01:04:51,470 [sighs] 1313 01:04:53,931 --> 01:04:55,308 Your mother left this in the cab. 1314 01:04:57,435 --> 01:04:58,269 Thank you. 1315 01:04:59,186 --> 01:05:00,438 Do you know where she is? 1316 01:05:00,563 --> 01:05:02,565 Sleeping. It's early. 1317 01:05:03,024 --> 01:05:04,483 -Is she? -Isn't she? 1318 01:05:05,067 --> 01:05:06,485 This isn't where I dropped her. 1319 01:05:07,445 --> 01:05:09,280 I got your address from her phone. 1320 01:05:15,912 --> 01:05:16,746 Mom? 1321 01:05:18,789 --> 01:05:20,416 Okay, where did you drop her? 1322 01:05:21,042 --> 01:05:23,377 At a pizza place in the Village. She was meeting friends. 1323 01:05:23,461 --> 01:05:25,129 She doesn't eat pizza. 1324 01:05:25,713 --> 01:05:27,840 And she doesn't have any friends in the Village. 1325 01:05:28,090 --> 01:05:29,634 And the hair, and the dress. Like she... 1326 01:05:30,176 --> 01:05:32,178 wanted people to look at her. That's not my mother. 1327 01:05:32,261 --> 01:05:33,763 Okay, she doesn't even like dancing. 1328 01:05:33,846 --> 01:05:35,431 She loves to dance. 1329 01:05:35,723 --> 01:05:37,308 [phone ringing] 1330 01:05:39,769 --> 01:05:40,728 Right. 1331 01:05:41,479 --> 01:05:44,899 Uh, my name and number are on a napkin in the phone case. 1332 01:05:46,734 --> 01:05:48,152 -I'd like to know she's okay. -[elevator bell] 1333 01:05:48,235 --> 01:05:50,071 [elevator door opens] 1334 01:05:52,949 --> 01:05:55,117 [Matt] Wait. Hey. Hi, Mrs. B. 1335 01:05:55,576 --> 01:05:56,410 Julia. 1336 01:05:57,119 --> 01:05:59,038 Look, thanks. That was... 1337 01:06:00,665 --> 01:06:01,624 That was nice. 1338 01:06:02,625 --> 01:06:04,377 Great photo on Instagram, by the way. 1339 01:06:04,710 --> 01:06:05,628 What? 1340 01:06:07,838 --> 01:06:09,256 [knock at door] 1341 01:06:09,840 --> 01:06:11,008 [groans] 1342 01:06:12,093 --> 01:06:13,719 Is that someone knocking? 1343 01:06:14,220 --> 01:06:16,097 -Or is it just my head pounding? -[knocking continues] 1344 01:06:16,180 --> 01:06:19,058 -[Helen] You go, Gill. Go. -Why me? 1345 01:06:20,267 --> 01:06:21,102 Okay. 1346 01:06:26,565 --> 01:06:27,400 What is it? 1347 01:06:27,483 --> 01:06:28,567 -Hey, Mom. -Daniel. 1348 01:06:28,901 --> 01:06:30,027 -Excuse me. -What? 1349 01:06:30,486 --> 01:06:31,320 Matt? 1350 01:06:32,279 --> 01:06:33,197 -They're here. [sighs] -Yeah. 1351 01:06:33,990 --> 01:06:35,032 -Mom! -[Carol] Hmm. 1352 01:06:35,116 --> 01:06:36,617 -Mom! -[gasps] 1353 01:06:36,701 --> 01:06:39,787 Is this why you couldn't make a call, hmm? Your new friend dropped this off. 1354 01:06:40,329 --> 01:06:42,873 -[groans] -We were worried sick. 1355 01:06:43,165 --> 01:06:46,669 -Did I invite any of you in? -Did we invite any of you to New York? 1356 01:06:46,752 --> 01:06:50,339 Could everyone just please stop shouting? I have a hangover. 1357 01:06:50,423 --> 01:06:54,260 Aww. Yeah, Mom, that's what happens when you get drunk at my work party. 1358 01:06:54,719 --> 01:06:57,263 And now there is a naked picture of me on Instagram. 1359 01:06:57,346 --> 01:07:00,307 -I had nothing to do with a naked picture. -In the tub. 1360 01:07:00,850 --> 01:07:03,519 Oh, yeah, well, I just showed one person. 1361 01:07:03,602 --> 01:07:05,104 [Helen] We’re allowed to be in New York. 1362 01:07:05,187 --> 01:07:07,398 I had no idea where you were last night. 1363 01:07:07,481 --> 01:07:10,109 I had no idea I had a grandchild, so we’re even. 1364 01:07:11,819 --> 01:07:12,820 I told her. 1365 01:07:12,903 --> 01:07:16,615 See, Paul talks to his mom. Why did you break up with Erin? 1366 01:07:17,324 --> 01:07:19,160 Ma, yesterday you told me you were checking out. 1367 01:07:19,243 --> 01:07:20,494 Why are you still here again? 1368 01:07:20,578 --> 01:07:23,664 -Wait, hang on. You’ve been in a hotel? -Why? Is that a crime? 1369 01:07:23,748 --> 01:07:25,082 Why didn’t you stay in a hotel? 1370 01:07:25,166 --> 01:07:27,418 Well, Helen and Gillian wouldn't let me. 1371 01:07:27,501 --> 01:07:29,003 Why? What’s wrong with a hotel? 1372 01:07:29,420 --> 01:07:32,590 I’ll tell you what’s wrong with this one. The security stinks. 1373 01:07:32,673 --> 01:07:35,301 Would you put on a robe at least? 1374 01:07:35,384 --> 01:07:36,886 What do you care? You’re gay. Here. 1375 01:07:36,969 --> 01:07:39,430 You know what? I'm gay, not blind. 1376 01:07:39,513 --> 01:07:41,640 Okay, Matt. I’ll see you at home. 1377 01:07:41,724 --> 01:07:43,059 Your home is in Poughkeepsie! 1378 01:07:43,142 --> 01:07:45,061 -That's not nice. -[Matt] I'm sorry. 1379 01:07:47,855 --> 01:07:49,607 -Ugh. -Bye, Ma. 1380 01:07:52,234 --> 01:07:55,696 -I wanted to see those since I was ten. -Those are some nice titties. 1381 01:07:55,780 --> 01:07:58,908 -Can we not talk about my mom's breasts? .[Daniel] She's a lovely lady. 1382 01:07:58,991 --> 01:08:01,827 -[Matt] Let's talk about going to lunch. -How about we... 1383 01:08:01,911 --> 01:08:03,245 talk about Woody Walker? 1384 01:08:03,329 --> 01:08:04,789 -[Paul] Oh, my God. -[Daniel]You should be proud. 1385 01:08:05,247 --> 01:08:08,209 -It was a toy boat! -A penis-shaped toy boat? 1386 01:08:08,292 --> 01:08:10,753 -Seventy-thousand likes? -Oh, let me see that. 1387 01:08:13,881 --> 01:08:15,382 I am so mad at her. 1388 01:08:15,466 --> 01:08:17,384 Just breathe. Stop. 1389 01:08:21,555 --> 01:08:22,640 I forgive you. 1390 01:08:24,266 --> 01:08:25,476 Okay, good. 1391 01:08:27,144 --> 01:08:29,271 Did you tell Larry he has a grandchild? 1392 01:08:29,855 --> 01:08:31,774 I’m gonna go to the store. [clears throat] 1393 01:08:31,899 --> 01:08:34,777 Yes. And he respected my decision. 1394 01:08:35,236 --> 01:08:36,237 I'm sure he did. 1395 01:08:38,364 --> 01:08:39,907 It does not matter anyway, Mom. 1396 01:08:40,908 --> 01:08:42,451 Dad does not have a grandchild. 1397 01:08:42,785 --> 01:08:44,787 -You do not have a grandchild. -I know. 1398 01:08:44,870 --> 01:08:47,832 I do not have a daughter. This was sperm only. 1399 01:08:47,915 --> 01:08:50,209 Oh, Paul, it's a girl? 1400 01:08:51,794 --> 01:08:53,087 [elevator bell] 1401 01:08:54,046 --> 01:08:55,256 [Carol] I'm going home. 1402 01:08:56,257 --> 01:08:57,424 I shouldn't have come. 1403 01:08:58,050 --> 01:09:01,262 Well, what did you think was going to happen, Ma? 1404 01:09:02,930 --> 01:09:04,723 I thought you wouldn't let me in. 1405 01:09:05,391 --> 01:09:06,350 That was an option? 1406 01:09:08,102 --> 01:09:09,061 You’re popular. 1407 01:09:10,146 --> 01:09:11,147 You're successful. 1408 01:09:11,981 --> 01:09:14,108 Mom, you're making it sound so depressing. 1409 01:09:14,191 --> 01:09:17,486 No. This is what’s supposed to happen to children. 1410 01:09:18,571 --> 01:09:20,406 You’re fully independent. 1411 01:09:20,823 --> 01:09:23,409 Mom, why does it feel like we’re breaking up? 1412 01:09:23,659 --> 01:09:26,328 Matthew, I need to tell you something. 1413 01:09:27,037 --> 01:09:30,624 Your dad didn’t want me at your games. That’s why I didn’t go. 1414 01:09:32,168 --> 01:09:36,088 I thought he drove you too hard. And we would argue about it, 1415 01:09:36,172 --> 01:09:39,216 and finally he said, "Well, stop coming if it bothers you." 1416 01:09:40,426 --> 01:09:41,385 And so I did. 1417 01:09:43,137 --> 01:09:45,556 And then all the trophies started rolling in 1418 01:09:45,639 --> 01:09:48,475 and I thought he was right and I was wrong. 1419 01:09:50,019 --> 01:09:52,438 And now it turns out that I was right. 1420 01:09:54,231 --> 01:09:57,193 And what's so ironic is that... 1421 01:09:58,694 --> 01:10:01,655 you did need me then, and you don’t need me now. 1422 01:10:02,573 --> 01:10:03,949 [stammers] I'm fine. 1423 01:10:05,117 --> 01:10:07,036 Right? I turned out fine, right? 1424 01:10:07,119 --> 01:10:07,995 Matthew... 1425 01:10:08,537 --> 01:10:10,789 you know who you are without me. 1426 01:10:13,417 --> 01:10:16,045 I need to figure out who I am without you. 1427 01:10:28,015 --> 01:10:29,016 [sighs] 1428 01:10:29,308 --> 01:10:32,728 So, apparently, the one who didn't carry the baby 1429 01:10:32,811 --> 01:10:35,564 is saying that her mother is the daddy granny. 1430 01:10:35,648 --> 01:10:38,275 So... [grunts] I'm not anything. 1431 01:10:38,484 --> 01:10:41,362 And they even had the gall to tell Paul 1432 01:10:41,445 --> 01:10:43,989 they didn’t want me to even see Ella. 1433 01:10:44,073 --> 01:10:46,283 -Well, what changed their mind? -[Helen] Nothing. 1434 01:10:46,367 --> 01:10:49,578 And you know what is most unfair? I always wanted a girl. 1435 01:10:49,662 --> 01:10:52,790 Larry was one and done, but I would’ve had three if we-- 1436 01:10:52,873 --> 01:10:55,668 Wait, why are we here if you can’t see the kid? 1437 01:10:55,751 --> 01:10:58,712 I could be hijacking Erin’s moving van right now. 1438 01:10:58,796 --> 01:11:02,091 -It’s not a perfect plan, but it’s a plan. -I thought we were going home. 1439 01:11:02,174 --> 01:11:04,593 Yeah, we are. We’re just stopping in Cobble Hill first. 1440 01:11:04,677 --> 01:11:08,180 I convinced Paul to give me the address, and I don’t want to show up empty-handed. 1441 01:11:08,264 --> 01:11:11,850 Well, we weren’t wanted by our sons. That didn’t stop us. 1442 01:11:11,934 --> 01:11:14,937 Yeah, I am so tired of being stopped. 1443 01:11:15,229 --> 01:11:19,400 Larry said if it meant so much to me to have a girl, I should’ve had twins. 1444 01:11:19,483 --> 01:11:21,485 Larry, Larry, Larry! Enough with Larry! 1445 01:11:21,568 --> 01:11:24,363 We never want to hear his name again. We never even liked him. 1446 01:11:26,448 --> 01:11:29,660 Look, you’ve been divorced from that idiot for 11 years. 1447 01:11:29,910 --> 01:11:32,371 You still talk about him in the present tense. 1448 01:11:32,454 --> 01:11:34,957 You're wasting a good marriage, 1449 01:11:35,040 --> 01:11:37,293 because you refuse to let go of a bad one. 1450 01:11:37,459 --> 01:11:38,585 What about baby yoga mats? 1451 01:11:38,669 --> 01:11:40,629 Are you jealous? Is that what this is about? 1452 01:11:40,713 --> 01:11:41,839 -What? -You’re jealous 1453 01:11:41,922 --> 01:11:44,466 that I’m the one that has a grandchild. 1454 01:11:44,633 --> 01:11:48,012 Helen, we are thrilled that you get to meet Ella today. 1455 01:11:48,095 --> 01:11:50,973 I think what Gillian is trying to say 1456 01:11:51,056 --> 01:11:53,267 is that you have something special in Frank. 1457 01:11:53,392 --> 01:11:57,146 The way he looks at you, the way he talks about you. 1458 01:11:57,229 --> 01:12:01,525 You have no idea how fortunate you are to have Frank instead of Larry. 1459 01:12:01,608 --> 01:12:04,570 We're not jealous of you. Paul went in a room and jerked off. 1460 01:12:04,653 --> 01:12:07,031 If that makes you a grandmother, then we're all grandmothers. 1461 01:12:07,114 --> 01:12:09,992 Let's stop, all right? We have already pissed off our sons. 1462 01:12:10,075 --> 01:12:12,119 We are all that we have left. 1463 01:12:13,203 --> 01:12:16,081 Jealous? Oh, my God. 1464 01:12:16,707 --> 01:12:18,542 What is wrong with you, Helen? 1465 01:12:22,087 --> 01:12:23,464 Okay. Okay. 1466 01:12:23,714 --> 01:12:25,299 I'm gonna tell you what’s wrong. 1467 01:12:25,424 --> 01:12:27,384 And it has been brewing for 11 years. 1468 01:12:27,468 --> 01:12:29,720 You know why I divorced Larry, right? 1469 01:12:29,887 --> 01:12:31,096 [Carol] Yeah. He cheated on you. 1470 01:12:31,180 --> 01:12:35,309 Yeah. It was that year our husbands went on that fishing trip to the Berkshires. 1471 01:12:35,392 --> 01:12:36,518 Okay, Helen. You win. 1472 01:12:36,602 --> 01:12:40,064 And Larry had a fuck buddy up there and I found out about it. 1473 01:12:40,147 --> 01:12:43,359 And I had the courage and the self-dignity to leave. 1474 01:12:43,442 --> 01:12:45,319 He was paying her rent from Paul's college fund. 1475 01:12:45,819 --> 01:12:47,571 She was an anorexic blonde vegan. 1476 01:12:47,654 --> 01:12:50,949 And she had a friend for Gillian’s husband. 1477 01:12:51,992 --> 01:12:54,870 Joel cheated on Gillian just like Larry cheated on me, 1478 01:12:54,995 --> 01:12:56,330 but she forgave him! 1479 01:12:56,413 --> 01:13:00,918 I don’t expect you to understand why I forgave Joel. 1480 01:13:01,001 --> 01:13:03,921 Because the only person you’ve ever truly loved is yourself. 1481 01:13:04,380 --> 01:13:05,255 Not Larry, 1482 01:13:05,422 --> 01:13:08,717 and not Frank, and not Carol, or me, or... 1483 01:13:08,967 --> 01:13:12,846 your new sperm-daughter. [raised voice] Not even your own son! 1484 01:13:13,722 --> 01:13:17,017 The only person you ever loved was you. 1485 01:13:18,018 --> 01:13:21,355 Okay. Well, if you are so much better at loving, 1486 01:13:21,438 --> 01:13:25,150 then why is your son the one who’s broke, depressed, and jobless? 1487 01:13:25,776 --> 01:13:27,444 Hmm? I’ll tell you why. 1488 01:13:27,945 --> 01:13:30,739 Because you sabotaged his chance at happiness. 1489 01:13:31,240 --> 01:13:32,825 That is bullshit, and you know it. 1490 01:13:32,908 --> 01:13:34,576 Is it? He had a ring. 1491 01:13:34,827 --> 01:13:38,956 But you, you planted so many doubts. 1492 01:13:39,039 --> 01:13:41,083 Not just about Erin, but about himself. 1493 01:13:41,333 --> 01:13:43,627 So that when he finally had the balls to propose, 1494 01:13:43,710 --> 01:13:45,796 he caught Erin schtupping her trainer. 1495 01:13:45,921 --> 01:13:47,589 I think Daniel would have mentioned-- 1496 01:13:47,673 --> 01:13:49,633 He didn’t want to give you the satisfaction. 1497 01:13:49,716 --> 01:13:53,262 You hated Erin until ten minutes ago. Paul told me. 1498 01:13:53,846 --> 01:13:55,055 Did you know about this? 1499 01:14:00,144 --> 01:14:03,063 I think Matt mentioned something once about a ring. 1500 01:14:03,147 --> 01:14:05,774 Helen, about that fishing trip... 1501 01:14:05,983 --> 01:14:09,278 -Carol, let's just go now. -And Paul jerked off to create a person. 1502 01:14:09,611 --> 01:14:11,613 Helen, in the Berkshires... 1503 01:14:14,408 --> 01:14:17,161 did the vegan have someone for Finn? 1504 01:14:19,246 --> 01:14:21,748 I’m sorry. She was full of friends. 1505 01:14:24,460 --> 01:14:25,752 [exhales heavily] 1506 01:14:30,340 --> 01:14:31,341 All this time... 1507 01:14:32,426 --> 01:14:34,803 and neither of you said anything to me. 1508 01:14:38,682 --> 01:14:40,893 And I thought we were friends. 1509 01:14:43,437 --> 01:14:44,396 Oh, fuck. 1510 01:14:44,813 --> 01:14:46,190 You’re taking a train home. 1511 01:14:48,066 --> 01:14:50,194 Oh... Please, don't leave. 1512 01:14:50,694 --> 01:14:55,699 You guys, I'm sorry. Carol, I'm sorry! Gillian, wait! Don't leave! 1513 01:14:56,116 --> 01:14:59,578 [whimpering] Oh, that was bad!! 1514 01:15:36,448 --> 01:15:37,282 [sighs] 1515 01:15:50,337 --> 01:15:51,463 [chuckles] 1516 01:15:57,803 --> 01:15:59,054 [knock at door] 1517 01:15:59,137 --> 01:16:01,390 [Gillian] Open the door or I'm gonna start singing. 1518 01:16:02,224 --> 01:16:05,519 Do you need directions home? I can show you how to Waze. 1519 01:16:06,645 --> 01:16:08,522 I don't want the government tracking me. 1520 01:16:08,981 --> 01:16:11,483 -Would it kill you to answer your phone? -I've been working. 1521 01:16:12,067 --> 01:16:13,652 -On what? -My novel. 1522 01:16:13,819 --> 01:16:15,654 -[sighs] -I finally got inspired. 1523 01:16:15,737 --> 01:16:18,282 It’s about an overbearing mother. It’s called Baking and Entering. 1524 01:16:19,366 --> 01:16:21,201 Daniel, this is important. 1525 01:16:21,285 --> 01:16:23,203 Do you still have the ring? 1526 01:16:26,206 --> 01:16:27,040 What ring? 1527 01:16:27,749 --> 01:16:29,835 The one you were planning on giving Erin. 1528 01:16:31,128 --> 01:16:33,255 Honey, why didn't you say anything? 1529 01:16:33,714 --> 01:16:36,592 Well, you never liked her anyway, Ma. So, what's the difference? 1530 01:16:37,342 --> 01:16:41,221 Wha-- Well, what do I know? I’m just some weird internet stalker. 1531 01:16:42,347 --> 01:16:43,557 And I was wrong. 1532 01:16:43,640 --> 01:16:46,101 I always wondered what it'd be like to hear you say those words. 1533 01:16:46,184 --> 01:16:48,478 And is it turns out, you were actually right. So... 1534 01:16:48,562 --> 01:16:49,396 No. 1535 01:16:50,105 --> 01:16:53,025 She's a lovely woman, and you're a lovely man. 1536 01:16:54,318 --> 01:16:56,278 So, if you have that ring, 1537 01:16:57,112 --> 01:16:59,364 and if she is the love of your life, 1538 01:16:59,948 --> 01:17:02,909 then do something before it is too late. 1539 01:17:02,993 --> 01:17:07,623 Because for all you know, she might be packing her bags and leaving town... 1540 01:17:08,081 --> 01:17:09,082 or something. 1541 01:17:12,002 --> 01:17:14,421 I love you. You're a grown man. 1542 01:17:15,547 --> 01:17:18,759 I just hope you do what is best for your life and your future. 1543 01:17:18,842 --> 01:17:20,927 Did you see her somewhere or something? 1544 01:17:21,470 --> 01:17:23,430 -Ma, wait. -[door opens] 1545 01:17:23,847 --> 01:17:26,224 Mom, did you break in to her place, too? 1546 01:18:24,825 --> 01:18:26,785 Is there a reason you're following me? 1547 01:18:28,704 --> 01:18:30,664 -Paul said you wouldn’t listen to us. -[baby starts crying] 1548 01:18:32,040 --> 01:18:34,334 It's okay, honey. It's okay. 1549 01:18:36,128 --> 01:18:37,587 What is it that you want? 1550 01:18:39,756 --> 01:18:40,590 I... 1551 01:18:41,425 --> 01:18:43,635 I don't want... anything. 1552 01:18:43,719 --> 01:18:45,887 I'm not asking for anything. 1553 01:18:45,971 --> 01:18:48,473 I'm just saying what I am. 1554 01:18:50,225 --> 01:18:51,184 A grandmother. 1555 01:18:52,436 --> 01:18:54,062 She has grandmothers. 1556 01:18:59,234 --> 01:19:01,069 [stammers] I brought... 1557 01:19:01,153 --> 01:19:02,028 a few... 1558 01:19:04,573 --> 01:19:05,699 hundred gifts. 1559 01:19:08,410 --> 01:19:10,537 Look, we talked about this before the birth. 1560 01:19:10,662 --> 01:19:15,167 We adore Paul. We do, and we want Ella to know Paul. 1561 01:19:15,417 --> 01:19:18,503 We hope she gets some of his great qualities. That’s why we chose him. 1562 01:19:19,921 --> 01:19:21,047 But he's not the dad. 1563 01:19:21,256 --> 01:19:22,424 He's a sperm donor. 1564 01:19:22,507 --> 01:19:24,926 Okay, we all agreed. We signed papers. 1565 01:19:28,930 --> 01:19:29,890 But... 1566 01:19:30,807 --> 01:19:32,267 now that I have her... 1567 01:19:33,643 --> 01:19:35,562 and now that I know what it feels like... 1568 01:19:37,022 --> 01:19:39,191 when she has a baby, if... 1569 01:19:40,317 --> 01:19:41,568 she has a baby... 1570 01:19:42,527 --> 01:19:44,279 if I couldn’t see that baby... 1571 01:19:46,823 --> 01:19:49,576 I’d probably chase that baby all over the city, too. 1572 01:19:51,995 --> 01:19:53,121 [baby fusses] 1573 01:19:53,497 --> 01:19:55,665 Aww, it's okay, honey. 1574 01:20:02,172 --> 01:20:03,423 [Helen gasps] 1575 01:20:04,800 --> 01:20:06,676 She looks just like Paul did. 1576 01:20:10,764 --> 01:20:12,182 Would you like to hold her? 1577 01:20:16,770 --> 01:20:17,979 -Say hi. -Hi. 1578 01:20:19,439 --> 01:20:20,816 [Helen] Aww. 1579 01:20:22,400 --> 01:20:23,401 Hi. 1580 01:20:25,070 --> 01:20:27,322 -Hi. -That's a good girl. 1581 01:20:27,948 --> 01:20:29,950 I want to be a good grandmother. 1582 01:20:30,992 --> 01:20:32,160 Not a bad one. 1583 01:20:33,578 --> 01:20:34,913 [sighs] 1584 01:20:36,623 --> 01:20:39,501 Honey, five weeks is not late. 1585 01:20:39,584 --> 01:20:41,837 Five weeks is abandonment. 1586 01:20:42,212 --> 01:20:44,714 Sounds like she waited a long time for you. 1587 01:20:44,798 --> 01:20:46,508 All right, Ma. You know what? 1588 01:20:46,591 --> 01:20:49,719 You and Dad have, like, your perfect story, so, you wouldn't... 1589 01:20:49,845 --> 01:20:51,930 No. There is no perfect story. 1590 01:20:52,973 --> 01:20:54,099 In fact... 1591 01:20:56,393 --> 01:21:00,146 years ago, your father had an infidelity. 1592 01:21:09,447 --> 01:21:11,157 Before I was born or after? 1593 01:21:13,326 --> 01:21:15,453 You were 16. 1594 01:21:19,040 --> 01:21:20,375 How did you forgive him? 1595 01:21:23,253 --> 01:21:24,462 It wasn't easy. 1596 01:21:25,380 --> 01:21:28,466 I went crazy for a little while. I went on this... 1597 01:21:28,842 --> 01:21:31,887 facacta five-week egg diet. You remember? [laughs] 1598 01:21:31,970 --> 01:21:35,098 Yes, I do. You were, like, you wanted chickens or something. 1599 01:21:35,181 --> 01:21:36,558 -Yeah. -A chicken coop? 1600 01:21:37,142 --> 01:21:38,059 [Gillian] Ah! 1601 01:21:38,435 --> 01:21:40,604 But, I realized... 1602 01:21:41,313 --> 01:21:43,273 I still wanted your dad. 1603 01:21:45,233 --> 01:21:48,278 And I decided to do the harder thing instead. 1604 01:21:51,448 --> 01:21:53,074 But I think what really... 1605 01:21:54,034 --> 01:21:56,536 made it possible for me to forgive him 1606 01:21:57,287 --> 01:21:58,121 was... 1607 01:21:58,622 --> 01:22:00,874 he never fully forgave himself. 1608 01:22:04,127 --> 01:22:05,629 Mom, I really admire you. 1609 01:22:07,047 --> 01:22:09,466 And I get why you're sharing this story with me. 1610 01:22:12,469 --> 01:22:14,429 I just don't think I'm built like that. 1611 01:22:15,388 --> 01:22:16,348 Hmm. 1612 01:22:17,515 --> 01:22:20,101 [sighs heavily] This is your life. 1613 01:22:20,644 --> 01:22:24,689 This big, bruised, bloody, beautiful thing. 1614 01:22:24,773 --> 01:22:27,734 This is your life. I'm not going to tell you what to do. 1615 01:22:27,859 --> 01:22:28,735 Since when? 1616 01:22:29,736 --> 01:22:30,737 Since today. 1617 01:22:31,321 --> 01:22:32,781 -Okay. -Daniel, hey. 1618 01:22:33,615 --> 01:22:37,202 You have been under the water for a long time. 1619 01:22:39,162 --> 01:22:40,455 But when you come up, 1620 01:22:41,831 --> 01:22:44,250 you need to decide what life you want. 1621 01:22:48,546 --> 01:22:49,464 You got this. 1622 01:22:50,966 --> 01:22:51,800 I love you. 1623 01:22:54,219 --> 01:22:55,053 Ma? 1624 01:22:56,554 --> 01:22:58,515 I think I'm locked out of my apartment. 1625 01:22:58,640 --> 01:23:00,308 [Gillian] Use the window. That's what I do. 1626 01:23:01,017 --> 01:23:01,851 I'm out! 1627 01:23:21,204 --> 01:23:22,622 [sighs] 1628 01:23:27,085 --> 01:23:28,920 -[exhales deeply] -[glasses bang on table] 1629 01:23:39,764 --> 01:23:40,765 [exhales] 1630 01:24:00,577 --> 01:24:01,453 [grunts] 1631 01:24:21,931 --> 01:24:22,766 Hi. 1632 01:24:22,849 --> 01:24:24,392 You're back. 1633 01:24:26,895 --> 01:24:28,146 [bags bang on floor] 1634 01:24:28,229 --> 01:24:30,023 [Frank] Oh, what's the matter, sweetheart? 1635 01:24:30,440 --> 01:24:32,150 You and Paul have a fight? 1636 01:24:32,734 --> 01:24:34,069 Oh, several. 1637 01:24:34,778 --> 01:24:36,946 And Gillian. And Carol. 1638 01:24:37,572 --> 01:24:39,491 We didn't even drive back together. 1639 01:24:40,492 --> 01:24:42,077 Everyone is... [sighs] 1640 01:24:42,619 --> 01:24:45,663 sick of me. And so am I. 1641 01:24:48,792 --> 01:24:50,835 Frank, why did you marry me? 1642 01:24:51,127 --> 01:24:52,128 [Frank chuckles] 1643 01:24:52,212 --> 01:24:55,673 Well, I think what everybody wonders is why you married me. 1644 01:24:56,132 --> 01:24:57,383 No, really. 1645 01:24:58,426 --> 01:24:59,385 Why? 1646 01:25:00,720 --> 01:25:01,763 You're kind. 1647 01:25:02,722 --> 01:25:04,933 And you're smart, you're funny as hell. 1648 01:25:05,683 --> 01:25:07,268 You have a lot of love to give. 1649 01:25:07,602 --> 01:25:10,146 -[softly] I do, right? -Yes. 1650 01:25:10,647 --> 01:25:13,858 And you’re opinionated and passionate. 1651 01:25:14,692 --> 01:25:18,363 And sometimes you have sharp edges and I like that. 1652 01:25:19,072 --> 01:25:20,365 You tell it like it is. 1653 01:25:22,033 --> 01:25:22,867 My... 1654 01:25:23,535 --> 01:25:24,452 looks? 1655 01:25:24,869 --> 01:25:27,413 Oh, you think I married you for your personality? 1656 01:25:27,497 --> 01:25:28,790 [Helen laughs] 1657 01:25:29,207 --> 01:25:31,417 -[chuckles] -You come in a very... 1658 01:25:31,918 --> 01:25:33,545 beautiful package. 1659 01:25:34,963 --> 01:25:37,757 But that’s not all there is to Helen Halston. 1660 01:25:39,843 --> 01:25:42,971 -I am so lucky. -Oh. 1661 01:25:43,471 --> 01:25:45,390 I'm so... 1662 01:25:47,225 --> 01:25:49,227 -[Helen moans] -[Frank chuckles] 1663 01:25:49,310 --> 01:25:50,603 Oh... Oh, really? 1664 01:25:50,687 --> 01:25:52,480 -Yes. We're doing it. -[Helen giggles] 1665 01:25:52,564 --> 01:25:54,566 [indistinct chatter] 1666 01:26:02,824 --> 01:26:03,825 Thanks for coming. 1667 01:26:04,325 --> 01:26:05,952 Your texts wore me down. 1668 01:26:07,871 --> 01:26:09,205 Did you bring a pen? 1669 01:26:16,254 --> 01:26:17,255 [doorbell rings] 1670 01:26:19,090 --> 01:26:20,133 -[gasps] -[delivery guy] Hey, Mrs. Walker. 1671 01:26:20,216 --> 01:26:21,176 More flowers. 1672 01:26:21,259 --> 01:26:24,387 Oh, it must be some mistake. I didn't order any flowers. 1673 01:26:24,596 --> 01:26:26,514 Oh, uh, there's a note with them. 1674 01:26:28,016 --> 01:26:31,477 -[Matt] Her favorite flower is an iris. -[chuckles, grunts] 1675 01:26:31,769 --> 01:26:33,021 Well, thank you, Shawn. 1676 01:26:33,229 --> 01:26:35,106 And I know that because she told me. 1677 01:26:35,481 --> 01:26:37,525 When she asked me for the ten things I know about her. 1678 01:26:38,026 --> 01:26:39,235 Then, you can't use it. 1679 01:26:39,861 --> 01:26:41,237 What? Yes, I can. It's a freebie. 1680 01:26:41,446 --> 01:26:43,781 If you can't think of ten things you know about your mother 1681 01:26:43,907 --> 01:26:46,618 without one of them being something that she flat-out told you, 1682 01:26:46,701 --> 01:26:49,245 -then you're a shitty son. -[chuckles] I'm not a shitty son. 1683 01:26:49,621 --> 01:26:52,165 Then think about why you love her and write it down. 1684 01:26:52,248 --> 01:26:53,374 [Matt sighs] 1685 01:26:54,792 --> 01:26:57,795 [Matt] I know she loved my father. And he wasn't that lovable. 1686 01:26:58,463 --> 01:27:00,006 He was always working. 1687 01:27:00,632 --> 01:27:03,176 Even when we played, it was work. 1688 01:27:04,719 --> 01:27:06,721 And my mom was the one who taught me how to have fun. 1689 01:27:07,722 --> 01:27:10,141 [chuckles] When I was a kid, she used to... [inhales] 1690 01:27:10,266 --> 01:27:12,685 read me these bedtime stories and... 1691 01:27:13,228 --> 01:27:15,521 she'd pretend there was one more page. 1692 01:27:18,107 --> 01:27:20,985 [chuckles] And we'd make up a new ending. 1693 01:27:26,032 --> 01:27:27,867 -Write that down. -Oh? Yeah. 1694 01:27:29,244 --> 01:27:31,162 Well, she did a lot of art when I was a kid. 1695 01:27:31,788 --> 01:27:33,414 Pen and ink note cards, 1696 01:27:33,498 --> 01:27:35,541 oil paintings from photographs. 1697 01:27:36,626 --> 01:27:38,461 This one time she did this... 1698 01:27:40,296 --> 01:27:41,673 great mural on my wall. 1699 01:27:45,802 --> 01:27:48,221 One: You loved my father. 1700 01:27:48,638 --> 01:27:49,973 [exhales] 1701 01:27:51,140 --> 01:27:53,977 Two: You taught me how to have fun. 1702 01:27:54,602 --> 01:27:55,770 [chuckles] 1703 01:27:56,479 --> 01:27:59,232 Three: You could have been an artist. 1704 01:28:00,191 --> 01:28:03,069 Number four, she thinks you're a good person. 1705 01:28:03,152 --> 01:28:04,195 [chuckles] 1706 01:28:04,529 --> 01:28:06,447 -No, she doesn't. -She told me. 1707 01:28:07,282 --> 01:28:09,617 She told you that she thinks that I'm good? 1708 01:28:10,910 --> 01:28:13,705 You can write she's the only person in the world who thinks you're good. 1709 01:28:15,999 --> 01:28:17,625 I never knew that she thought that. 1710 01:28:18,584 --> 01:28:22,672 Four: You're the only person in the world who thinks I'm good. 1711 01:28:24,007 --> 01:28:27,969 Five: You made me feel loved and safe. 1712 01:28:28,845 --> 01:28:33,558 Six: You cut up fruit for my snacks even when I begged for junk food. 1713 01:28:33,641 --> 01:28:34,809 [laughs] 1714 01:28:35,310 --> 01:28:39,063 [Matt] Seven: You still call me, even when I ignore you. 1715 01:28:40,148 --> 01:28:41,274 Thank you. 1716 01:28:42,483 --> 01:28:43,484 Eight: 1717 01:28:44,319 --> 01:28:46,279 The only times I've ever seen you angry 1718 01:28:46,404 --> 01:28:49,324 are times you deserved to be angrier. 1719 01:28:50,908 --> 01:28:51,826 Nine: 1720 01:28:52,744 --> 01:28:54,037 You love to dance. 1721 01:28:54,495 --> 01:28:56,456 -[chuckles] -[Matt] Ten: 1722 01:28:57,457 --> 01:28:58,541 You're my mother. 1723 01:29:00,001 --> 01:29:00,877 Eleven: 1724 01:29:01,878 --> 01:29:04,922 You taught me there is room in every story... 1725 01:29:05,590 --> 01:29:06,883 for a better ending. 1726 01:29:23,941 --> 01:29:24,817 Erin! 1727 01:29:27,028 --> 01:29:28,696 -[van engine starts] -Erin! 1728 01:29:30,156 --> 01:29:31,115 [shouts] Erin! 1729 01:29:33,326 --> 01:29:34,160 Erin! 1730 01:29:36,204 --> 01:29:37,038 Erin! 1731 01:29:39,874 --> 01:29:40,792 Erin! 1732 01:29:45,421 --> 01:29:46,756 [shouts] Erin! Wait up! 1733 01:29:50,885 --> 01:29:52,387 I really... [panting] I need to... 1734 01:29:52,970 --> 01:29:55,765 -get to the gym more often. -What are you doing? [chuckles] 1735 01:29:55,848 --> 01:29:58,434 -What are you doing? -I’m moving to LA. 1736 01:29:58,518 --> 01:30:00,353 Well... [breathing heavily] 1737 01:30:01,312 --> 01:30:03,564 -can I talk to you first? -About what? 1738 01:30:03,731 --> 01:30:04,607 About us. 1739 01:30:04,732 --> 01:30:08,361 Oh, my... [chuckles] It's too late, Daniel. My whole life is in this truck. 1740 01:30:09,529 --> 01:30:11,739 That’s funny. I was just thinking the same thing. 1741 01:30:13,741 --> 01:30:15,159 You’re not going to stop me. 1742 01:30:16,744 --> 01:30:17,578 Okay. 1743 01:30:18,246 --> 01:30:19,288 Okay. 1744 01:30:21,499 --> 01:30:23,084 Can we talk on the way? 1745 01:30:23,584 --> 01:30:25,420 -You don't have anything to do? -Please. 1746 01:30:25,503 --> 01:30:28,256 -You're gonna drive me to LA? -I'm coming to LA. 1747 01:30:28,339 --> 01:30:30,383 -I'm coming with you. -[cars honking] 1748 01:30:30,466 --> 01:30:32,135 Coming to LA... 1749 01:30:32,218 --> 01:30:34,095 -[Daniel shouts] I'm sorry. -Sorry! 1750 01:30:34,220 --> 01:30:36,222 -I'm sorry. -[cars continue honking] 1751 01:30:37,598 --> 01:30:38,641 I'm sorry, too. 1752 01:30:39,642 --> 01:30:40,935 [car honking] 1753 01:30:41,018 --> 01:30:42,770 [Erin] Do you know how to drive one of these? 1754 01:30:42,854 --> 01:30:44,355 [Daniel] I don't know what I'm doing. 1755 01:30:45,273 --> 01:30:47,400 [inspirational orchestral music] 1756 01:31:01,539 --> 01:31:03,458 -Hey, where you going? -[girl laughing] 1757 01:31:04,959 --> 01:31:06,878 I swear she looks like both of you. 1758 01:31:06,961 --> 01:31:08,796 To be honest, we think she looks like your mother. 1759 01:31:08,880 --> 01:31:11,466 -Uh, acts like it. -[ladies laugh] 1760 01:31:11,549 --> 01:31:13,926 -Oh, my goodness! -[Andre] Speak of the devil. 1761 01:31:14,010 --> 01:31:16,012 -Or angel, depending who you ask. -Who's that? 1762 01:31:16,095 --> 01:31:18,931 Oh, grandma loves Ella! 1763 01:31:19,015 --> 01:31:21,267 -[Paul] Look who it is! -[Ella] Grandma! 1764 01:31:21,851 --> 01:31:23,060 [Helen] And you. 1765 01:31:23,144 --> 01:31:25,104 -And you. And you, -Hi. 1766 01:31:25,521 --> 01:31:27,148 [kiss] And you! 1767 01:31:27,231 --> 01:31:28,274 [Gillian and Erin chuckle] 1768 01:31:28,357 --> 01:31:31,694 [Gillian] Well, this is kind of a complicated garment, isn't it? 1769 01:31:31,777 --> 01:31:33,738 [Daniel] My mother's at her son's semi Jewish wedding 1770 01:31:33,821 --> 01:31:35,740 -and she's still complaining. -[Erin] Okay. 1771 01:31:35,823 --> 01:31:37,783 You're not supposed to see the bride before the wedding. 1772 01:31:37,867 --> 01:31:41,162 I know, but we broke a few rules already. I think we can break one more. 1773 01:31:41,704 --> 01:31:43,873 -Well, he's got a point. We can. -[Gillian laughs] 1774 01:31:47,793 --> 01:31:49,086 Ahh! 1775 01:31:53,090 --> 01:31:54,091 Thanks, Ma. 1776 01:31:55,301 --> 01:31:56,135 For everything. 1777 01:32:04,101 --> 01:32:05,311 No one's going to notice. 1778 01:32:05,561 --> 01:32:06,729 [both chuckle] 1779 01:32:07,313 --> 01:32:09,273 There's just one little thing, though. 1780 01:32:09,607 --> 01:32:11,901 Uh... it's too late for a thing. 1781 01:32:12,109 --> 01:32:15,196 I know. I know, but this is a really important thing. 1782 01:32:16,072 --> 01:32:17,865 I think we should rehearse the kiss again. 1783 01:32:17,949 --> 01:32:19,951 -[Erin laughs] -[Daniel chuckles] 1784 01:32:20,409 --> 01:32:22,411 [indistinct party chatter] 1785 01:32:33,047 --> 01:32:35,883 I'm still so angry I can barely stand to look at you. 1786 01:32:36,467 --> 01:32:38,344 I know. Thank you for the invitation. 1787 01:32:38,427 --> 01:32:40,638 I invited Frank. You’re his plus one. 1788 01:32:41,138 --> 01:32:43,057 -Did you get my messages? -Yeah, about 20 of them. 1789 01:32:43,140 --> 01:32:46,602 -Did you get my texts? -Uh-huh. "Stop calling me." 1790 01:32:47,520 --> 01:32:48,396 You know... 1791 01:32:49,146 --> 01:32:52,483 I am kind of responsible for this whole wedding, 1792 01:32:52,567 --> 01:32:54,735 I mean, if we hadn’t gone to New York-- 1793 01:32:54,819 --> 01:32:55,695 [Gillian chuckles] 1794 01:32:55,778 --> 01:32:58,030 So, now, we’re considering that trip a success? 1795 01:32:58,114 --> 01:33:00,199 Well, look at where we are. 1796 01:33:00,283 --> 01:33:02,368 And Carol's in Italy. 1797 01:33:02,577 --> 01:33:04,579 She didn’t even RSVP. 1798 01:33:04,704 --> 01:33:07,665 She’s probably too busy painting, eating pizza, 1799 01:33:07,748 --> 01:33:10,251 -taking Italian lovers. -[laughs] Oh! 1800 01:33:10,334 --> 01:33:13,296 I’m sure she’s miserable since she sold that house. 1801 01:33:13,379 --> 01:33:14,380 [Gillian] Hmm. 1802 01:33:16,132 --> 01:33:17,592 [car honks] 1803 01:33:18,426 --> 01:33:20,177 Don’t start the wedding without us! 1804 01:33:20,261 --> 01:33:21,637 -[both gasp] -[Gillian squeals] 1805 01:33:21,721 --> 01:33:25,683 I knew she would come! I missed her so much more than I missed you. 1806 01:33:25,766 --> 01:33:27,101 Same here. Only double. 1807 01:33:27,602 --> 01:33:29,312 Oh, it’s just his date. 1808 01:33:30,062 --> 01:33:32,940 She’s too old to be his date. She’s, like, his age. 1809 01:33:35,651 --> 01:33:37,778 -[Helen gasps] -[Gillian screams] 1810 01:33:37,862 --> 01:33:39,196 [Helen screams] Oh, my God! 1811 01:33:39,655 --> 01:33:42,366 -Oh, my God! -[both screaming] 1812 01:33:43,034 --> 01:33:43,909 [Gillian] Yes! 1813 01:33:45,745 --> 01:33:46,912 [Helen] Oh! 1814 01:33:48,664 --> 01:33:50,416 I heard there was cake. 1815 01:33:50,499 --> 01:33:52,209 You don’t call, you don’t write. 1816 01:33:52,376 --> 01:33:54,962 -Oh, we missed you so much! -Oh... 1817 01:33:55,254 --> 01:33:57,423 You look so glamorous. 1818 01:33:57,506 --> 01:33:58,966 [laughs] 1819 01:33:59,675 --> 01:34:02,345 By the way, I brought Bourbon. 1820 01:34:02,428 --> 01:34:04,388 -[Carol] Oh. -[Gillian] Oh, no! 1821 01:34:04,472 --> 01:34:07,183 - Not again. -[Carol] Of course she did. 1822 01:34:07,683 --> 01:34:09,685 ["Just Our Style" playing] 1823 01:34:09,769 --> 01:34:11,854 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1824 01:34:12,897 --> 01:34:15,316 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1825 01:34:16,442 --> 01:34:18,861 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1826 01:34:20,029 --> 01:34:21,989 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1827 01:34:22,073 --> 01:34:25,618 ♪ Heartbeat, rewind Turned up, amplified ♪ 1828 01:34:25,701 --> 01:34:27,953 ♪ We can do it how we like ♪ 1829 01:34:28,412 --> 01:34:31,082 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Bang bang, young drunk ♪ 1830 01:34:31,165 --> 01:34:35,002 ♪ Cheap thrills, big love Do what makes us feel alive ♪ 1831 01:34:35,461 --> 01:34:36,420 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1832 01:34:36,504 --> 01:34:39,840 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh, hey ♪ 1833 01:34:39,924 --> 01:34:42,677 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh ♪ 1834 01:34:42,802 --> 01:34:45,721 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1835 01:34:45,805 --> 01:34:49,600 ♪ Like a super sonic boom Love the way we're coming through ♪ 1836 01:34:49,684 --> 01:34:52,853 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1837 01:34:52,937 --> 01:34:56,482 ♪ And we're shooting for the sky Living young and running wild ♪ 1838 01:34:56,565 --> 01:34:59,318 ♪ That's just our style Whoa, oh ♪ 1839 01:35:00,111 --> 01:35:01,445 ♪ Whoa, oh Hey ♪ 1840 01:35:01,529 --> 01:35:04,990 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh That's just our style ♪ 1841 01:35:05,074 --> 01:35:06,492 ♪ Whoa, oh ♪ 1842 01:35:07,118 --> 01:35:08,619 ♪ Whoa, oh Hey ♪ 1843 01:35:08,703 --> 01:35:13,082 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh That's just our style ♪ 1844 01:35:13,165 --> 01:35:15,584 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1845 01:35:16,836 --> 01:35:19,088 ♪ Hey, ah huh, ah huh ♪ 1846 01:35:19,171 --> 01:35:22,591 ♪ Black west, sparks fly Light the fuse, electrify ♪ 1847 01:35:22,675 --> 01:35:26,137 ♪ We can do it how we like Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1848 01:35:26,220 --> 01:35:29,765 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh, hey ♪ 1849 01:35:29,849 --> 01:35:32,435 ♪ Everybody now here we go Oh, oh ♪ 1850 01:35:32,518 --> 01:35:35,521 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1851 01:35:35,604 --> 01:35:39,358 ♪ Like a super sonic boom Love the way we're coming through ♪ 1852 01:35:39,442 --> 01:35:42,778 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1853 01:35:42,862 --> 01:35:46,157 ♪ And we're shooting for the sky We'll be young and running wild ♪ 1854 01:35:46,240 --> 01:35:49,076 ♪ That's just our style Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1855 01:35:49,785 --> 01:35:53,164 ♪ Whoa, oh, hey Whoa, oh, oh ♪ 1856 01:35:53,372 --> 01:35:56,208 ♪ That's just our style Whoa, oh ♪ 1857 01:35:56,667 --> 01:35:58,127 ♪ Whoa, oh, hey ♪ 1858 01:35:58,711 --> 01:36:02,214 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh That's just our style ♪ 1859 01:36:02,298 --> 01:36:05,342 ♪ Whoa, oh Whoa, oh, hey ♪ 1860 01:36:05,760 --> 01:36:10,014 ♪ Whoa, oh, oh That's just our style ♪ 1861 01:36:11,474 --> 01:36:14,101 ["These Boots Are Made For Walkin'" starts playing] 1862 01:36:14,226 --> 01:36:15,853 [cheering and laughing] 1863 01:36:21,484 --> 01:36:23,152 [women start singing] 1864 01:36:23,235 --> 01:36:26,655 ♪ You keep saying You got something for me ♪ 1865 01:36:28,616 --> 01:36:32,286 ♪ Something you call love But confess ♪ 1866 01:36:33,496 --> 01:36:37,416 ♪ Well, you've been a'messin' where you shouldn't've been a'messin' ♪ 1867 01:36:37,917 --> 01:36:39,084 [Carol] You're driving. 1868 01:36:39,168 --> 01:36:43,088 ♪ And now someone else Is getting all your best ♪ 1869 01:36:44,465 --> 01:36:47,092 ♪ These boots are made for walking ♪ 1870 01:36:47,426 --> 01:36:49,929 ♪ And that's just what they'll do ♪ 1871 01:36:50,221 --> 01:36:55,226 ♪ And one of these days these boots Are gonna walk all over you ♪ 1872 01:36:56,268 --> 01:36:57,770 [women scream] 1873 01:37:05,277 --> 01:37:08,823 ♪ You keep lyin' When you oughta be truthin' ♪ 1874 01:37:08,906 --> 01:37:10,074 [Carol screams] 1875 01:37:10,866 --> 01:37:14,245 ♪ You keep losin' When you oughta not bet ♪ 1876 01:37:16,288 --> 01:37:20,459 ♪ You keep samin' When you oughta be a'changin' ♪ 1877 01:37:21,377 --> 01:37:25,297 ♪ Now what's right is right But you ain't been right yet ♪ 1878 01:37:25,381 --> 01:37:26,382 [Carol] All right. 1879 01:37:26,715 --> 01:37:31,387 ♪ These boots are made for walking And that's just what they'll do ♪ 1880 01:37:31,470 --> 01:37:32,763 [Carol] I love to dance. 1881 01:37:32,847 --> 01:37:38,143 ♪ One of these days these boots Are gonna walk all over you ♪ 1882 01:37:38,894 --> 01:37:41,605 [all women ooh and ahh] 1883 01:37:44,608 --> 01:37:46,193 [Carol] Get out the car! 1884 01:37:47,778 --> 01:37:51,699 ♪ You keep playing Where you shouldn't be playing ♪ 1885 01:37:52,825 --> 01:37:56,829 ♪ And you keep thinking That you'll never get burnt ♪ 1886 01:37:58,455 --> 01:38:02,626 ♪ I just found me A brand new box of matches ♪ 1887 01:38:03,961 --> 01:38:07,756 ♪ And what he knows You ain't had time to learn ♪ 1888 01:38:09,008 --> 01:38:11,802 ♪ These boots are made for walking ♪ 1889 01:38:12,136 --> 01:38:14,638 ♪ And that's just what they'll do ♪ 1890 01:38:14,972 --> 01:38:19,935 ♪ One of these days these boots Are gonna walk all over you ♪ 1891 01:38:21,478 --> 01:38:24,815 ♪ Are you ready, boots? Start walkin' ♪ 1892 01:38:25,941 --> 01:38:28,402 ♪ A'walkin' ♪ 1893 01:38:40,915 --> 01:38:43,167 [everybody cheering]