1 00:00:10,411 --> 00:00:12,713 (man coughs, sniffles) 2 00:00:12,813 --> 00:00:14,915 (pages shuffling) 3 00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:17,651 LAWYER: Please state your name for the record. 4 00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:19,653 -Stan Marsh. -(page turns) 5 00:00:19,753 --> 00:00:22,556 LAWYER: And, uh, Mr. Marsh, you were involved 6 00:00:22,656 --> 00:00:24,858 in the streaming wars, is that correct? 7 00:00:25,793 --> 00:00:28,829 We made stuff for streaming services, yes. 8 00:00:28,929 --> 00:00:32,333 And how do you know the defendant in this case? 9 00:00:32,433 --> 00:00:36,170 She's the mother of my f-- acquaintance. 10 00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:39,207 When you made your deals for streaming services, 11 00:00:39,307 --> 00:00:43,043 you sort of leveraged them against each other, didn't you? 12 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:45,213 That is correct. 13 00:00:45,313 --> 00:00:47,047 And now the streaming bubble has burst 14 00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:50,718 and your own father is in hiding, isn't that correct? 15 00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:52,886 My dad is missing, that is correct. 16 00:00:52,986 --> 00:00:55,823 What exactly was your job in making these 17 00:00:55,923 --> 00:00:58,659 little Popsicle stick boats for streaming services? 18 00:00:58,759 --> 00:01:02,263 Um, my job was to eat the Popsicles. 19 00:01:02,363 --> 00:01:05,499 And the people who paid you didn't care what you made? 20 00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:07,535 Well, if you look at it, only about a fourth of what's on 21 00:01:07,635 --> 00:01:09,203 most streaming services is really worth a shit, 22 00:01:09,303 --> 00:01:10,571 so-- Oh, sorry. 23 00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,940 Do you know what an exclusive deal is? 24 00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:15,143 Yes, I know what an exclusive deal is. 25 00:01:15,243 --> 00:01:18,179 So, if you make an exclusive deal with a streaming service, 26 00:01:18,279 --> 00:01:19,780 you can't make an exclusive deal 27 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:21,549 with another streaming service, can you? 28 00:01:21,649 --> 00:01:23,484 It's not our fault that the streaming wars happened! 29 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:25,419 So, then why not just give back the money? 30 00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:27,255 -We can't! -Why not?! 31 00:01:27,355 --> 00:01:30,224 'Cause the money is all in Cartman's fucking tits! 32 00:01:30,324 --> 00:01:31,425 (gallery gasping) 33 00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:34,295 -* * -(gavel banging) 34 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:37,798 CARTMAN: Ms. Cartman, you and your son live in a hot dog, 35 00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:38,932 is that correct? 36 00:01:39,032 --> 00:01:41,169 Yes, Eric, you know that's correct. 37 00:01:41,269 --> 00:01:42,670 And your son wanted you 38 00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,138 to get fake tits so that the rich guy 39 00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:45,639 across the street would let you live with him 40 00:01:45,739 --> 00:01:47,241 but you refused, is that right? 41 00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:48,942 That's right. 42 00:01:49,042 --> 00:01:51,445 So when I said, "If you don't get fake tits I will," 43 00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:52,946 you just told me to go ahead. 44 00:01:53,046 --> 00:01:56,350 Yes, because I'm sick of you doing extreme things 45 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:57,685 to get your way. 46 00:01:57,785 --> 00:01:59,787 So you refused even though tons 47 00:01:59,887 --> 00:02:01,555 of women get fake breasts all the time. 48 00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,457 Your Honor, I'd like to introduce Exhibit D-- 49 00:02:03,557 --> 00:02:05,626 tons of women with fake tits. 50 00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:11,098 Tom, I'm standing outside the courthouse where the judge 51 00:02:11,199 --> 00:02:14,635 has just thrown out the Cartman v. Cartman case. 52 00:02:14,735 --> 00:02:17,605 The judge said, quote, "You're all a bunch of shitheads. 53 00:02:17,705 --> 00:02:19,173 Get out of my courtroom." 54 00:02:19,273 --> 00:02:20,808 Just proof once again, Tom, 55 00:02:20,908 --> 00:02:24,712 that streaming services have made everything suck. 56 00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:29,517 ("You Don't Miss Your Water" by Otis Redding playing) 57 00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:37,725 * In the beginning * 58 00:02:39,026 --> 00:02:42,463 * You really loved me, oh * 59 00:02:43,731 --> 00:02:48,502 * I was too blind * 60 00:02:48,602 --> 00:02:52,440 * I could not see, now * 61 00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:56,644 * But now that you left me * 62 00:02:57,645 --> 00:03:03,384 * Oh, how I cried, I keep crying * 63 00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:07,020 * You don't miss your water * 64 00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:11,325 * Till your well runs dry * 65 00:03:12,159 --> 00:03:15,062 'Kay, Mom, well, I hope you learned your lesson. 66 00:03:15,162 --> 00:03:16,864 So, maybe now, will you get fake tits 67 00:03:16,964 --> 00:03:18,899 so I can get these stupid things out? 68 00:03:18,999 --> 00:03:21,235 No, Eric! No! 69 00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,705 * I never thought, no * 70 00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:26,274 Can I get a Frosty? 71 00:03:26,374 --> 00:03:31,044 * I never thought you'd ever leave me * 72 00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:37,418 * But now that you've left me * 73 00:03:37,518 --> 00:03:42,923 * Good Lord, good Lord, how I cried * 74 00:03:43,023 --> 00:03:45,626 * You don't miss your water * 75 00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:47,861 * You don't miss your water * 76 00:03:47,961 --> 00:03:51,899 * Till your well runs dry * 77 00:03:51,999 --> 00:03:55,669 * Ooh, you don't miss your water * 78 00:03:55,769 --> 00:03:58,005 * You don't miss your water * 79 00:03:58,105 --> 00:04:02,209 * Till your well runs dry * 80 00:04:02,310 --> 00:04:06,547 * I miss my water, I keep missing my water... * 81 00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,849 -Oh, shit, it's Karen! -What? 82 00:04:08,949 --> 00:04:10,451 (others gasping, murmuring) 83 00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:12,753 Come on. Go, kids, go. 84 00:04:17,425 --> 00:04:20,227 What... what happened? 85 00:04:21,962 --> 00:04:25,165 -Wow, it's the real thing. -We gotta go! 86 00:04:26,133 --> 00:04:28,569 (siren whoops) 87 00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:33,307 There! You see? Karen is right there! 88 00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:36,777 Okay, okay, everyone back-- just stay back! 89 00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:40,147 All right, Karen. We don't want any trouble. 90 00:04:40,247 --> 00:04:42,149 Huh? 91 00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:46,053 It doesn't have to be like this, Karen. Let us get you some help. 92 00:04:46,153 --> 00:04:49,823 Can-can someone please tell me what's going on? 93 00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:51,992 Is there, like, a manager I can speak to somew... 94 00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:55,529 (grunts, stammers, exhales) 95 00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,398 Karen's clear! 96 00:04:57,498 --> 00:04:58,932 Move in! 97 00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:03,103 (monitor beeping steadily) 98 00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:07,775 * * 99 00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:13,647 HARRIS: Just relax. 100 00:05:13,747 --> 00:05:16,817 I need to know what you remember, Karen. 101 00:05:17,785 --> 00:05:19,987 I started a streaming service... 102 00:05:20,087 --> 00:05:23,190 to compete with the weed farm across the street. 103 00:05:23,290 --> 00:05:24,792 And some guy died. 104 00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:26,394 That's right. 105 00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:29,997 Do you know where the owner of Credigree Weed is now? 106 00:05:30,097 --> 00:05:31,198 No. 107 00:05:31,298 --> 00:05:33,501 The steaming wars got out of hand. 108 00:05:33,601 --> 00:05:35,102 Your rival here somehow got 109 00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:38,038 ManBearPig to work for him and murder the competition. 110 00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:42,510 You... went down to the Colorado State Water Commission's office. 111 00:05:42,610 --> 00:05:44,578 You asked to speak with the manager. 112 00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:46,914 And then you went full nuclear Karen. 113 00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:49,850 Full nuclear Karen? 114 00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:52,986 HARRIS: You went ballistic on everybody. 115 00:05:53,086 --> 00:05:56,089 -MAN: Okay... -Call the cops, goddamn it, if you don't like me over here. 116 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,658 -Fucking call 'em! -MAN: Okay. Karen. 117 00:05:57,758 --> 00:05:59,059 Motherfucker! 118 00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:00,928 -Go back to Mexico. -WOMAN: Listen. I said-- 119 00:06:01,028 --> 00:06:02,162 I said "excuse me." 120 00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:04,164 Go. Go back wherever you're from! 121 00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:06,400 HARRIS: You traveled all over the state and demanded to 122 00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:08,301 -see everyone's managers. -He's the one-- he's the one that went off. 123 00:06:08,402 --> 00:06:10,203 Oh, God... 124 00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:11,705 -I don't have a right to be here?! -Outside the State office 125 00:06:11,805 --> 00:06:13,507 in Denver, you caused a 20-car pileup. 126 00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:15,676 -Huh?! Call a manager now! -Five people were severely injured. 127 00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:18,746 And then you attacked the airport. 128 00:06:18,846 --> 00:06:22,783 I want the manager of the fucking airport here! 129 00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:25,185 Who's tellin' me to... (shrieking) 130 00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:28,121 I want the manager of the airport here! 131 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:31,058 And then the same thing happened in Madrid. 132 00:06:31,158 --> 00:06:34,928 Who is the manager of this fucking shithole?! 133 00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,630 -HARRIS: In Bangladesh... -(no audio) 134 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,899 And in the mountains of Tibet. 135 00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:41,168 And I'm sorry, Karen, but... 136 00:06:41,268 --> 00:06:43,704 I'm afraid all of this has become 137 00:06:43,804 --> 00:06:46,540 the most watched videos on YouTube. 138 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:48,141 No. 139 00:06:49,309 --> 00:06:51,344 * * 140 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,196 * * 141 00:07:19,507 --> 00:07:21,174 * * 142 00:07:37,390 --> 00:07:39,426 * * 143 00:07:46,433 --> 00:07:48,468 * * 144 00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:07,888 Tolkien... 145 00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:10,023 What are you doing here? 146 00:08:10,123 --> 00:08:12,292 I'm looking for something, all right? 147 00:08:12,392 --> 00:08:14,862 -Looking for what? -Anything. 148 00:08:14,962 --> 00:08:17,931 I don't know! People are saying that my dad caused all this. 149 00:08:18,031 --> 00:08:19,833 That he's hiding because he knows he's guilty. 150 00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:21,535 I know that's not true. 151 00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:23,937 What does that have to do with the rich guy 152 00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:25,472 who lived here moving away? 153 00:08:26,239 --> 00:08:29,476 The guy who lived here didn't move away. He was killed. 154 00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,546 What? 155 00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:34,915 I know that my dad wouldn't just run and hide! 156 00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,617 What if he needs me right now? 157 00:08:36,717 --> 00:08:40,420 Tolkien, I wanted the guy who lived here to be my dad. 158 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,956 Who would have killed him? 159 00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:47,427 * * 160 00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:55,268 (slurping) 161 00:08:58,672 --> 00:09:00,073 Okay, I'm done. 162 00:09:00,173 --> 00:09:01,709 All right, then put your plate in the sink 163 00:09:01,809 --> 00:09:03,310 and march right on upstairs! 164 00:09:03,410 --> 00:09:05,679 Maybe the next time you decide to pit streaming services 165 00:09:05,779 --> 00:09:08,248 against each other and cause a drought, you'll think twice. 166 00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:11,919 I want no playing, no reading and no thinking about fun stuff. 167 00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:13,821 You are being grounded. 168 00:09:15,288 --> 00:09:17,090 It's not my fault streaming services paid people more 169 00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:19,860 than was sustainable in any business model. 170 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,061 -Butters. -(yells) 171 00:09:21,161 --> 00:09:22,462 Shh! Butters, stop. 172 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,598 Eric! You can't be in here, I'm grounded. 173 00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:25,933 We've been set up, Butters. 174 00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,635 -What? -The whole streaming wars! 175 00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:28,802 The whole thing was a lie! 176 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,303 Eric, is that a real gun? 177 00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,139 Fuck yes, it's a real gun. Butters, listen to me. 178 00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:34,041 Someone bought up all the water 179 00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:35,776 and murdered anyone who got in their way. 180 00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,577 -No... -Yes, Butters. 181 00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:39,613 Someone worked with the Colorado water commissioner 182 00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:41,514 and cheated the system. The same person 183 00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:43,817 who is now using climate change to make a profit! 184 00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,218 Who? 185 00:09:45,318 --> 00:09:46,920 It didn't make sense to me. 186 00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:48,856 Why my mom was being so stubborn. 187 00:09:48,956 --> 00:09:50,490 Why she wouldn't do what I asked. 188 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:52,592 But then I saw Tolkien across the street 189 00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:54,561 and I figured it out... 190 00:09:54,662 --> 00:09:56,830 Tolkien is fucking my mom. 191 00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:58,866 Tolkien?! 192 00:09:58,966 --> 00:10:00,400 I wanted my mom to get fake tits 193 00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:02,335 so she could marry the rich guy across the street. 194 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:04,571 Now that guy is dead and my mom is acting strange. 195 00:10:04,672 --> 00:10:06,840 The only explanation is that she's fucking Tolkien 196 00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:08,375 and they don't want me to know! 197 00:10:08,475 --> 00:10:10,543 But, Eric, Tolkien was making the boats with us, he... 198 00:10:10,644 --> 00:10:12,612 Butters, Butters. My eyes are up here. 199 00:10:12,713 --> 00:10:13,814 Stop staring at my tits. 200 00:10:13,914 --> 00:10:15,215 Oh, sorry. 201 00:10:15,315 --> 00:10:16,650 There's a bad guy out there getting away 202 00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:20,020 with murder, Butters. And we have to catch him. 203 00:10:20,888 --> 00:10:23,523 * * 204 00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,525 Good people of Denver, 205 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:28,061 we are living through a horrible time. 206 00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:31,765 This drought, i-it affect everybody. 207 00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:34,634 It affect me. My waterpark. 208 00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:40,908 But I have a plan to not only reopen my waterpark, 209 00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:45,445 but also help all of Colorado with their water supply problem. 210 00:10:45,545 --> 00:10:50,283 So, if you don't mind, I'd like to show you my deck. 211 00:10:50,383 --> 00:10:53,320 -(grumbling) -Oh, Christ. -No. 212 00:10:54,121 --> 00:10:55,923 This is the business proposal deck 213 00:10:56,023 --> 00:10:58,625 for the Pipi streaming service! 214 00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:00,260 -Oh... -Oh, that's okay. 215 00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:04,131 In just a few days I will reopen my waterpark 216 00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:08,535 which will now run on 100% pee! 217 00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:13,106 And then we can collect half of the pee every day 218 00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:15,743 and send it out to the people of Denver 219 00:11:15,843 --> 00:11:19,279 and all over Colorado for their daily use. 220 00:11:20,113 --> 00:11:22,349 I'm sorry, Mr. Pipi, 221 00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:24,985 but I really don't think we'll be able to get people to invest 222 00:11:25,085 --> 00:11:26,954 in your streaming service. 223 00:11:27,054 --> 00:11:28,621 No, no, no, it's okay! 224 00:11:28,722 --> 00:11:32,192 Because I got the biggest celebrities 225 00:11:32,292 --> 00:11:34,227 who made a commerci for crypto 226 00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:37,130 to make the commerci for me! 227 00:11:39,266 --> 00:11:41,401 We are living in a severe drought. 228 00:11:41,501 --> 00:11:43,670 There simply isn't a choice anymore, 229 00:11:43,771 --> 00:11:46,573 we have to find alternate sources for water. 230 00:11:47,407 --> 00:11:49,076 Hi. I'm Matt Damon. 231 00:11:49,176 --> 00:11:50,610 You've heard me talk about the wonders of 232 00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:53,113 cryptocurrency, and now there's a company 233 00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,682 who can give us that new source. 234 00:11:55,783 --> 00:11:57,184 Pipi water. 235 00:11:57,284 --> 00:11:59,753 Pee can be used for almost anything. 236 00:11:59,853 --> 00:12:01,288 We can water our lawns with it. 237 00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:04,491 We can also use urine for our shower water. 238 00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:06,093 (groaning) 239 00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:07,828 Fortune favors the brave. 240 00:12:07,928 --> 00:12:09,262 And a brave person knows 241 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:12,465 that pasta cooked in pee water tastes just fine. 242 00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:17,670 (gagging) 243 00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:19,439 Okay, hold on. 244 00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:21,474 (gagging) 245 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:23,043 (quickly): Fortune favors the brave. 246 00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,711 (coughs, gags) 247 00:12:24,812 --> 00:12:28,715 Did you know frozen pee can make for a delicious summer treat? 248 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:33,086 (gagging) 249 00:12:33,186 --> 00:12:34,554 Okay. 250 00:12:34,654 --> 00:12:37,124 (gagging) 251 00:12:37,224 --> 00:12:38,491 Fortune favors the brave. 252 00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:40,928 And pee water actually pairs really well 253 00:12:41,028 --> 00:12:42,695 with an Impossible Burger. 254 00:12:44,998 --> 00:12:48,468 (gagging) 255 00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:51,004 (croaking): Fortune... 256 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,639 (quietly): Fortune favors the brave. 257 00:12:53,841 --> 00:12:54,975 (gagging) 258 00:12:55,075 --> 00:12:56,476 Fortune favors the br-- (gags) 259 00:12:58,678 --> 00:12:59,980 FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Go pee! 260 00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:02,315 With Pipi+. 261 00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:04,184 MATT DAMON (over video): ...for water. 262 00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:05,953 -Hi. I'm Matt Damon. -Dad? 263 00:13:06,053 --> 00:13:08,655 You've heard me talk about the wonders of cryptocurrency, 264 00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:12,259 and now there's a company who can give us that new source. 265 00:13:12,359 --> 00:13:13,927 Pipi water. 266 00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,863 -You okay? -Pee can be used for almost anything. 267 00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:18,231 -What have I become, Stan? -We can water our lawns with it. 268 00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:20,267 -How did I just sit by and let the world sink to this? -We can also use urine 269 00:13:20,367 --> 00:13:22,202 for our shower water. 270 00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:24,704 (breathing heavily) 271 00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:26,106 (groaning softly) 272 00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:27,774 (gags) 273 00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:34,814 I used to be a scientist. Do you remember that? 274 00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:38,919 I was the one who warned the town about a volcano. 275 00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:42,555 I warned them about the day after tomorrow. 276 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:47,327 And then... it all become about weed. 277 00:13:48,295 --> 00:13:50,263 When did that happen, Stan? 278 00:13:50,363 --> 00:13:52,765 I guess we all just got greedy, Dad. 279 00:13:52,866 --> 00:13:55,202 I wanted to be a scientist because 280 00:13:55,302 --> 00:13:57,905 scientists solve problems. 281 00:13:58,005 --> 00:14:01,008 Do you even know what kind of geologist I was, Stan? 282 00:14:01,108 --> 00:14:02,309 No. 283 00:14:02,409 --> 00:14:05,545 I was a "fluvial geomorphologist." 284 00:14:05,645 --> 00:14:10,017 Someone who studies the changes in streams and rivers. 285 00:14:10,117 --> 00:14:12,685 And when the town needed me most... 286 00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:15,488 I was just out bitching because all I cared about 287 00:14:15,588 --> 00:14:17,557 was getting high and rich. 288 00:14:17,657 --> 00:14:20,627 I can't even remember the old me. 289 00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:23,630 * * 290 00:14:24,998 --> 00:14:28,035 * There was a boy I used to know * 291 00:14:28,135 --> 00:14:30,770 * With dreams as big as the fire in his heart * 292 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:34,007 * He grew to be a man of such good will * 293 00:14:34,107 --> 00:14:35,175 * Always so patient * 294 00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:36,709 * Always so smart * 295 00:14:36,809 --> 00:14:39,579 * He had so much but he threw it away * 296 00:14:39,679 --> 00:14:42,682 * Somewhere along he got off track * 297 00:14:42,782 --> 00:14:44,918 * But today he's making the change for good * 298 00:14:45,018 --> 00:14:48,688 * And now that man is coming back * 299 00:14:48,788 --> 00:14:51,224 * Oh, we missed you, Randy * 300 00:14:51,324 --> 00:14:55,295 * Where have you been? * 301 00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:56,763 * It seems such a long time * 302 00:14:56,863 --> 00:14:59,466 * Since we've seen our old friend * 303 00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:02,469 * Everyone needs you, Randy * 304 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:05,705 * Where did you go? * 305 00:15:06,639 --> 00:15:08,175 * It's like you just became a one-note * 306 00:15:08,275 --> 00:15:11,378 * Overwrought part of the show * 307 00:15:12,145 --> 00:15:15,282 * Here I am trying to make it right * 308 00:15:15,382 --> 00:15:19,819 * Gonna take my life back with my baby tonight * 309 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,055 * Oh, we missed you, Randy, we missed you, Randy * 310 00:15:22,155 --> 00:15:23,290 * Where have you been? * 311 00:15:23,390 --> 00:15:25,458 * I've been acting like a fool * 312 00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:27,460 * It seems such a long time * 313 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:30,630 * Since we've seen you, old friend * 314 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:33,666 * We've all been waiting for this day to come * 315 00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:36,303 * We're all so happy about the things you've done * 316 00:15:37,070 --> 00:15:38,538 * 'Cause you're going back to Randy * 317 00:15:38,638 --> 00:15:39,639 * I'm going back to Randy * 318 00:15:39,739 --> 00:15:41,241 * We missed you, Randy * 319 00:15:41,341 --> 00:15:43,110 * I missed me, Randy * 320 00:15:43,210 --> 00:15:45,145 * It's so good to have you back now * 321 00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:47,714 -* Our dear friend * -* We missed you, Randy * 322 00:15:47,814 --> 00:15:50,583 * Our dear friend, Randy * 323 00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,919 -* I'm Randy * -* Randy * 324 00:15:53,020 --> 00:15:55,355 -* Randy, Randy * -* I'm Randy. * 325 00:16:02,362 --> 00:16:04,464 CARTMAN: All right, I've got eyes on him. 326 00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:06,799 Looks like he's in the basement bathroom. 327 00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:09,402 BUTTERS: I didn't even know Tolkien had a basement bathroom. 328 00:16:09,502 --> 00:16:11,538 CARTMAN: Yeah, neither did I. Sneaky bastard. 329 00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,373 Seems like he's looking for something. 330 00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:15,975 Oh, nope, he's turning back around. 331 00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,744 He's pulling down his pants. 332 00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:19,646 Oh, I think he's gonna take a shit. 333 00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:22,715 Mark down: "8:35, started taking shit." 334 00:16:28,688 --> 00:16:30,257 What the fuck are you doing? 335 00:16:30,357 --> 00:16:33,460 -Oh, shit. Go, go, go. -(Butters yelling) 336 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:35,495 -* * -(zipper closes) 337 00:16:35,595 --> 00:16:38,965 Hello?! Where are-- Eric, I can see you! 338 00:16:39,066 --> 00:16:41,301 CARTMAN (whispering): There's no way he can see us. 339 00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:42,802 Just stay still. 340 00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:45,672 I see you behind the fucking tree! 341 00:16:46,806 --> 00:16:49,042 Don't come another step closer or I shoot Butters. 342 00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:50,210 What?! 343 00:16:50,310 --> 00:16:51,944 Let's go. Move. Move! 344 00:16:52,745 --> 00:16:55,348 Do you wanna tell me what's going on, Tolkien? 345 00:16:55,448 --> 00:16:57,550 -I have no idea! -Sure! 346 00:16:57,650 --> 00:16:59,286 We're all supposed to believe that streaming services 347 00:16:59,386 --> 00:17:00,653 were all our fault. 348 00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:02,089 I remember that day at school, Tolkien. 349 00:17:02,189 --> 00:17:04,191 You were the one who said I should build the boats. 350 00:17:04,291 --> 00:17:05,858 Because I felt bad for you! 351 00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:07,360 You felt bad for me? 352 00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:09,262 Or maybe is it that you wanted the drought to-- Butters, 353 00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,064 will you please stop staring at my tits. 354 00:17:11,164 --> 00:17:12,865 I'm sorry. 355 00:17:12,965 --> 00:17:14,667 We've been doing research, Tolkien. 356 00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:16,403 Somebody manipulated the system. 357 00:17:16,503 --> 00:17:18,271 All the water rights, water laws, 358 00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:19,706 there's a big chain of corruption 359 00:17:19,806 --> 00:17:20,973 and the whole thing stinks like your wiener 360 00:17:21,074 --> 00:17:22,775 after fucking my mom. 361 00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:25,878 Eric, I swear, I have no clue what you're talking about. 362 00:17:25,978 --> 00:17:27,046 Then read it. 363 00:17:29,349 --> 00:17:31,551 Read about how none of the streaming services had any 364 00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:33,320 chance of lasting but paid out thousands of dollars anyway. 365 00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:35,788 Read about how the water commissioner of Colorado 366 00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:37,557 knew about it the entire time! 367 00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:39,759 Eric, where did you get this? 368 00:17:39,859 --> 00:17:41,528 Tolkien, my eyes are up here, 369 00:17:41,628 --> 00:17:43,230 please stop staring at my titties. 370 00:17:43,330 --> 00:17:45,031 I am staring you dead in the eye. 371 00:17:45,132 --> 00:17:46,766 Where did you get this? 372 00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:48,000 * * 373 00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:49,969 Hi. I'm Gwyneth Paltrow. 374 00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:53,106 I got women everywhere excited about investing in crypto. 375 00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:56,609 And now there's something even better to invest in. 376 00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:02,415 Uh... uh... um... 377 00:18:03,783 --> 00:18:05,985 Fortune favors the brave. Fortune favors the brave. 378 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:08,655 (slurps, gags) 379 00:18:11,057 --> 00:18:12,292 FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Go pee! 380 00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:14,494 With Pipi+. 381 00:18:17,730 --> 00:18:19,566 My fellow Coloradoans, 382 00:18:19,666 --> 00:18:21,534 today we will try to put an end 383 00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:23,836 to the drought that has crippled our state. 384 00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:27,607 It's my pleasure to announce that the city of Denver 385 00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:31,578 will be investing heavily in the Pipi streaming service. 386 00:18:31,678 --> 00:18:35,114 And we encourage you all to "Go pee." 387 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:40,320 Oh, thank you! Thank you, Denver! 388 00:18:40,420 --> 00:18:45,292 It is a my honor to give you all of the pee that I can. 389 00:18:45,392 --> 00:18:49,562 And so, as of today, we are all going 390 00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:52,064 -to live in... -RANDY (distant): Wait! 391 00:18:53,032 --> 00:18:55,235 Hold on! 392 00:18:55,335 --> 00:18:57,804 -Who is that? -Excuse me! 393 00:18:57,904 --> 00:19:00,707 Please, I have to get to the front! 394 00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:02,842 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone, please. 395 00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:04,344 -Please, I have an announcement. -(feedback screeches) 396 00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:08,215 Everyone, my name is Dr. Randy Marsh 397 00:19:08,315 --> 00:19:10,049 and I am... 398 00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,485 -a scientist! -(feedback screeches) 399 00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:16,523 The damage that has been done to our fresh water 400 00:19:16,623 --> 00:19:20,260 due to the streaming wars is irreversible, yes. 401 00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:22,762 But I believe I have a plan. 402 00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:24,631 And if you don't mind, 403 00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:28,034 I'd like to show my deck to each and every one of you. 404 00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:31,137 Whip it out, bro! 405 00:19:32,472 --> 00:19:33,673 The answer... 406 00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:37,109 is an ocean water desalinization plant. 407 00:19:37,210 --> 00:19:39,912 When all of you hear about droughts in our country, 408 00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:43,350 don't you ever think, "Wait, the Earth is 75% water. 409 00:19:43,450 --> 00:19:46,419 What the fuck? How can we not have enough water, right?" 410 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:47,687 (all murmuring in agreement) 411 00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:49,389 The only thing stopping us from not 412 00:19:49,489 --> 00:19:53,192 being able to use seawater for our daily use is the salt. 413 00:19:53,293 --> 00:19:55,562 I have a plan to pipe the water 414 00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:57,530 from the oceans up to the Continental Divide. 415 00:19:57,630 --> 00:19:59,999 From there, we separate the salt from the water, 416 00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:04,437 giving our entire country enough clean water forever. 417 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:09,476 And we ship the salt off to Arby's and KFC where it belongs. 418 00:20:10,377 --> 00:20:12,745 (cheering and whooping) 419 00:20:12,845 --> 00:20:16,683 Dr. Marsh, you have all the funding you need. 420 00:20:16,783 --> 00:20:19,419 Randy Marsh has the better deck! 421 00:20:19,519 --> 00:20:21,588 (cheering loudly) 422 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:27,560 * * 423 00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:29,061 * She's only 17... * 424 00:20:29,161 --> 00:20:32,399 PIPI: Ever since I can remember, 425 00:20:32,499 --> 00:20:34,634 I've wanted two things. 426 00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:38,004 My own waterpark and to only have to pay 427 00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:42,842 for one streaming service. And what I didn't know... 428 00:20:42,942 --> 00:20:45,512 was that my own employees 429 00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:48,080 would try to fuck me! 430 00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:51,083 And fucking ruin my life! 431 00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:54,821 Who is this guy talking about a desalinization plant?! 432 00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:57,023 How did we miss him?! 433 00:20:57,123 --> 00:21:00,126 He's just some scientist, h-he came out of nowhere. 434 00:21:00,226 --> 00:21:04,531 I asked you to take care of anybody who might get in my way! 435 00:21:04,631 --> 00:21:06,566 I just wanna be a lifeguard. 436 00:21:06,666 --> 00:21:08,468 "I just wanna be a lifeguard." 437 00:21:08,568 --> 00:21:10,903 You just wanna fuck Pipi! 438 00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:13,773 You're all a bunch of stinky poopy babies! 439 00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:17,410 All of you! You little pussy bitches! 440 00:21:17,510 --> 00:21:18,778 (roars) 441 00:21:18,878 --> 00:21:20,513 Oh, you don't like that, huh? 442 00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:22,615 I told you, I told you kill anyone 443 00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:24,250 in the mountains who could be a problem! 444 00:21:24,351 --> 00:21:27,987 You a little ManBear-bitch, that's what you are! 445 00:21:28,087 --> 00:21:29,489 (roaring) 446 00:21:29,589 --> 00:21:31,591 You wanna fuck with Pipi, huh? 447 00:21:31,691 --> 00:21:33,460 Don't forget what I have on you. 448 00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:35,261 Sit down, ManBearBitchy! 449 00:21:35,362 --> 00:21:37,697 (groans) 450 00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:40,800 I want that desalinization plant gone 451 00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:43,936 and I want the scientist dead! 452 00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:46,773 There can only be one streaming service. 453 00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:50,042 And it's going to be Pipi+! 454 00:21:55,615 --> 00:21:58,751 * * 455 00:21:58,851 --> 00:22:01,354 HARRIS: It was 8:15 on Thursday night. 456 00:22:01,454 --> 00:22:03,890 The people were all excited about the possibility 457 00:22:03,990 --> 00:22:05,958 of a new desalinization plant. 458 00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:09,228 But I had a lingering uneasiness in my gut. 459 00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:12,164 And then, just like that, in walked the nicest pair 460 00:22:12,264 --> 00:22:15,802 of knockers I'd ever seen in my life. 461 00:22:19,906 --> 00:22:21,408 Detective, we need to talk to you. 462 00:22:21,508 --> 00:22:23,309 Aw, fuck, not you again. 463 00:22:23,410 --> 00:22:25,578 Get out of here kid, I'm not going to arrest your mom. 464 00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:28,047 You might think differently when you hear what we have to say. 465 00:22:28,147 --> 00:22:30,149 -Go ahead, Tolkien. -Sir, 466 00:22:30,249 --> 00:22:32,051 we think the person who killed Robert Cussler 467 00:22:32,151 --> 00:22:35,221 actually had a bigger plan: to make the drought happen. 468 00:22:36,155 --> 00:22:38,157 Your father killed Robert Cussler. 469 00:22:38,257 --> 00:22:40,493 And what makes you think he had a bigger plan? 470 00:22:40,593 --> 00:22:43,863 Wait a minute. Did he tell you his business plan? 471 00:22:43,963 --> 00:22:45,998 Did he show you his deck?! 472 00:22:46,098 --> 00:22:47,199 No. 473 00:22:47,299 --> 00:22:49,368 My uncle Larry showed me his dick once. 474 00:22:49,469 --> 00:22:51,971 My dad isn't capable of killing anyone. 475 00:22:52,071 --> 00:22:53,540 Well, I'm sure that's true. 476 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:57,376 And that's why your father had ManBearPig do it for him. 477 00:22:57,477 --> 00:23:00,346 You see, your dad used ManBearPig to get rid 478 00:23:00,447 --> 00:23:03,149 of the competition in the streaming wars. 479 00:23:03,249 --> 00:23:04,484 Butters, please. 480 00:23:04,584 --> 00:23:06,819 And ManBearPig will just go right on doing 481 00:23:06,919 --> 00:23:09,922 whatever Tolkien's father says because he's afraid. 482 00:23:10,022 --> 00:23:13,125 ManBearPig is afraid? Of what? 483 00:23:14,260 --> 00:23:18,531 Afraid for the safety... of its wife and child. 484 00:23:19,331 --> 00:23:23,536 Not many people know about PigBearGirl and Chuck Chuck, 485 00:23:23,636 --> 00:23:26,205 but your father must have threatened ManBearPig 486 00:23:26,305 --> 00:23:28,340 that he would tell people they exist. 487 00:23:28,441 --> 00:23:32,211 And if everyone knew that climate change had a child, 488 00:23:32,311 --> 00:23:33,980 they'd go after it. 489 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:36,616 Okay, whatever, but you have no proof 490 00:23:36,716 --> 00:23:38,317 that it was my dad who did anything. 491 00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:40,086 Don't I? 492 00:23:41,153 --> 00:23:43,556 I happen to know for a fact that while the rest 493 00:23:43,656 --> 00:23:45,257 of the state is suffering, 494 00:23:45,357 --> 00:23:47,026 your dad has been out living it up. 495 00:23:47,126 --> 00:23:48,861 Surveillance camera caught him enjoying 496 00:23:48,961 --> 00:23:50,897 his time at a waterpark. 497 00:23:54,567 --> 00:23:56,302 The waterpark. 498 00:23:57,470 --> 00:23:58,738 * * 499 00:23:58,838 --> 00:24:00,740 Hello, I'm Larry David. 500 00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:02,775 When I made my Superbowl commercial for crypto, 501 00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:04,877 I didn't even really know what it was! 502 00:24:04,977 --> 00:24:06,946 But thanks to the money I made, I now can enjoy 503 00:24:07,046 --> 00:24:09,716 my favorite beverage every day! 504 00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:13,185 (gurgling) 505 00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:15,287 (gagging) 506 00:24:17,223 --> 00:24:18,591 FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Go pee! 507 00:24:18,691 --> 00:24:20,459 With Pipi+. 508 00:24:22,962 --> 00:24:25,097 (water drips echoing) 509 00:24:27,466 --> 00:24:28,400 (gasps loudly) 510 00:24:28,501 --> 00:24:30,336 (gasping) 511 00:24:35,875 --> 00:24:37,510 (grunts) 512 00:24:40,947 --> 00:24:42,882 (echoing): Hello? 513 00:24:43,716 --> 00:24:45,852 Where the fuck am I? 514 00:24:46,753 --> 00:24:48,254 (grunting) 515 00:24:53,726 --> 00:24:55,461 Hello?! 516 00:25:03,603 --> 00:25:07,339 PIPI: Well, I don't know, but it needs to be a-fixed, okay? 517 00:25:07,439 --> 00:25:09,976 Maybe we have some kind of intruder, huh, 518 00:25:10,076 --> 00:25:12,311 that's doing the sabotage, you know! 519 00:25:12,411 --> 00:25:13,846 GUARD: We looked everywhere, sir. 520 00:25:13,946 --> 00:25:15,381 We didn't find anything. 521 00:25:15,481 --> 00:25:17,684 PIPI: Well, look harder, you stupid fuck! 522 00:25:17,784 --> 00:25:20,086 Something going on down here! 523 00:25:22,254 --> 00:25:23,790 (snarling) 524 00:25:24,557 --> 00:25:26,959 (squealing) 525 00:25:30,963 --> 00:25:33,833 (low growling) 526 00:25:33,933 --> 00:25:37,269 Who are you? Did you bandage me up? 527 00:25:38,905 --> 00:25:40,372 Chuck Chuck! 528 00:25:42,108 --> 00:25:43,175 GUARD: Come on! Something's happened 529 00:25:43,275 --> 00:25:45,011 to the outtake valves again! 530 00:25:45,778 --> 00:25:47,446 (shushing) 531 00:25:49,616 --> 00:25:51,417 (indistinct chatter) 532 00:25:51,517 --> 00:25:54,120 (tools clacking) 533 00:25:55,988 --> 00:25:57,857 Okay, that's great, guys. 534 00:25:57,957 --> 00:26:00,126 Keep the pipe on the downward slope. 535 00:26:00,226 --> 00:26:02,862 -How's it all going? -Oh, thanks, honey. 536 00:26:02,962 --> 00:26:04,496 It's good. Fast. 537 00:26:04,597 --> 00:26:06,298 I think we can have this thing up and running 538 00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:08,868 -for tests in a week. -That's amazing. 539 00:26:08,968 --> 00:26:11,303 You're not so bad yourself, babe. 540 00:26:13,005 --> 00:26:14,674 Oh, and hey, Sharon? 541 00:26:15,642 --> 00:26:18,010 Sorry about the whole "weed thing." 542 00:26:18,110 --> 00:26:20,346 It's okay, Randy. 543 00:26:23,215 --> 00:26:25,117 All right, Nelson, I've updated the engineering. 544 00:26:25,217 --> 00:26:26,919 I've accounted for the elevation 545 00:26:27,019 --> 00:26:29,155 but I still can't figure out the pipeline. 546 00:26:29,255 --> 00:26:31,624 The problem is actually getting enough pressure 547 00:26:31,724 --> 00:26:34,193 to get the saltwater up here to the plant. 548 00:26:34,293 --> 00:26:36,262 It almost seems impossible. 549 00:26:36,362 --> 00:26:37,730 I don't know how you get saltwater 550 00:26:37,830 --> 00:26:39,999 up here without a tremendous amount of energy. 551 00:26:40,099 --> 00:26:41,600 Yeah, well, let's just keep working. 552 00:26:41,701 --> 00:26:43,069 There has to be an answer. 553 00:26:43,169 --> 00:26:45,337 Science always has an answer. 554 00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,974 Randy, it's good to have you back 555 00:26:48,074 --> 00:26:49,842 at the U.S. Geological Survey. 556 00:26:49,942 --> 00:26:51,343 Thanks, Nelson. 557 00:26:52,544 --> 00:26:53,545 Oh, and hey, Nelson? 558 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:56,816 Sorry about the whole "weed thing." 559 00:26:56,916 --> 00:26:58,918 That's okay, Randy. 560 00:27:00,086 --> 00:27:01,921 (machinery clacking) 561 00:27:04,023 --> 00:27:05,858 * * 562 00:27:05,958 --> 00:27:08,027 Hi, my name is Naomi Osaka. 563 00:27:08,127 --> 00:27:10,830 And I enjoy crypto just like I enjoy 564 00:27:10,930 --> 00:27:13,666 fresh piss on my organic greens. 565 00:27:17,737 --> 00:27:19,305 Fortune favors the brave. 566 00:27:19,405 --> 00:27:22,074 -Fortune favors the brave. -Fortune favors the brave. 567 00:27:22,174 --> 00:27:24,243 Fortune favors the brave. 568 00:27:24,343 --> 00:27:26,512 (gagging) 569 00:27:28,881 --> 00:27:29,916 FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Go pee! 570 00:27:30,016 --> 00:27:31,450 With Pipi+. 571 00:27:32,218 --> 00:27:36,155 * She's a summertime girl * 572 00:27:38,024 --> 00:27:40,159 ANNOUNCER (over P.A.): Welcome to Pipi's Waterpark! 573 00:27:40,259 --> 00:27:43,662 Where the thrills and fun are all 100% urine. 574 00:27:43,763 --> 00:27:46,565 We hope you have a magical day and if you need to 575 00:27:46,665 --> 00:27:50,402 use the restroom, just let it go in one of our many pools. 576 00:27:50,502 --> 00:27:52,438 Your pee will be collected and harvested 577 00:27:52,538 --> 00:27:55,808 for Denver's water supply. Go pee, Colorado. 578 00:27:55,908 --> 00:27:57,143 * She'll take you... * 579 00:27:57,243 --> 00:27:59,846 Boy, oh boy, what a great day for a swim! 580 00:27:59,946 --> 00:28:02,982 Can't wait to hit that fresh pool! 581 00:28:03,082 --> 00:28:05,985 Blackhawk, this is Browneye. I am in position. 582 00:28:06,919 --> 00:28:09,355 Copy, Butters. Do you see the slide we're looking for? 583 00:28:10,456 --> 00:28:12,725 That's a negative, Blackhawk. Got nothin' here. 584 00:28:12,825 --> 00:28:14,961 What about over by the funnel cakes, Eric? 585 00:28:16,162 --> 00:28:17,329 * She's a summertime girl... * 586 00:28:17,429 --> 00:28:19,065 I don't see the slide that matches 587 00:28:19,165 --> 00:28:20,532 the one in the picture, Tolkien. 588 00:28:20,632 --> 00:28:22,869 I'm afraid this could be a dead end, guys. 589 00:28:22,969 --> 00:28:24,937 -Wait. Oh, my God. -What? 590 00:28:25,037 --> 00:28:27,774 There's a guy here who's just totally staring at my tits. 591 00:28:27,874 --> 00:28:30,309 Hey, do you mind, sir? My eyes are up here. 592 00:28:30,409 --> 00:28:32,078 Eric, we're trying not to draw attention to oursel... 593 00:28:32,178 --> 00:28:34,146 Stop looking at my tits! Yes, you are! 594 00:28:34,246 --> 00:28:35,647 Eric, do you... 595 00:28:35,748 --> 00:28:37,216 These people are all staring at my fucking tits! 596 00:28:37,316 --> 00:28:38,717 They're such perverts! 597 00:28:38,818 --> 00:28:41,420 Little boy, we're just a bit shocked to see that. 598 00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:43,990 Yeah, 'cause you're on the itty bitty titty committee, bitch! 599 00:28:44,090 --> 00:28:46,492 Just focus on the fucking plan, Eric! 600 00:28:47,293 --> 00:28:48,727 BUTTERS: Hey, fellas, I think I got it! 601 00:28:48,828 --> 00:28:51,764 I found the slide where the photo was taken! 602 00:28:52,531 --> 00:28:55,401 And there's some kind of bunker entrance right next to it. 603 00:29:02,208 --> 00:29:03,776 (birds chirping) 604 00:29:03,876 --> 00:29:06,112 * * 605 00:29:13,953 --> 00:29:15,855 Hello, ma'am. I'm sorry 606 00:29:15,955 --> 00:29:19,291 but I need to speak with you about your husband. 607 00:29:20,492 --> 00:29:22,628 -Is he dead? -Not yet. 608 00:29:22,728 --> 00:29:26,598 But he will be as soon as I can find him. Can I come in? 609 00:29:27,433 --> 00:29:29,735 Your husband is a very dangerous man. 610 00:29:29,836 --> 00:29:33,239 We now believe that he caused the whole drought to happen. 611 00:29:33,339 --> 00:29:35,774 -Do you mind? -Yes. 612 00:29:35,875 --> 00:29:37,243 Great. 613 00:29:37,343 --> 00:29:39,979 Now, obviously, your husband had some kind 614 00:29:40,079 --> 00:29:41,780 of bigger business plan. 615 00:29:42,548 --> 00:29:44,516 He might have it all explained somewhere. 616 00:29:44,616 --> 00:29:46,518 Does your husband have a deck? 617 00:29:47,486 --> 00:29:49,321 Of course my husband has a dick. 618 00:29:49,421 --> 00:29:51,757 Well, I'd like to see it, if that's okay with you. 619 00:29:51,858 --> 00:29:54,593 How am I supposed to show you when I don't even know 620 00:29:54,693 --> 00:29:56,628 -where he is? -All right. If you want to 621 00:29:56,728 --> 00:29:58,497 be difficult, ma'am, that's fine. 622 00:29:58,597 --> 00:30:00,933 But you know where your husband is 623 00:30:01,033 --> 00:30:02,634 and so does your little boy. 624 00:30:02,734 --> 00:30:04,570 I'm sure that you've both seen his deck 625 00:30:04,670 --> 00:30:06,605 and I'm sure it's pretty massive. 626 00:30:06,705 --> 00:30:09,475 Detective, my husband is a good man. 627 00:30:09,575 --> 00:30:11,577 Well, I'm sure he was at one point. 628 00:30:11,677 --> 00:30:13,779 But then he started a streaming service 629 00:30:13,880 --> 00:30:16,115 and became the monster that he is today. 630 00:30:16,215 --> 00:30:18,817 Okay, well, I think you should leave now. 631 00:30:18,918 --> 00:30:20,452 All right, fine. 632 00:30:20,552 --> 00:30:23,422 But just so you know, when I find your husband-- 633 00:30:23,522 --> 00:30:26,525 and I will find him-- I'm gonna shoot him. 634 00:30:26,625 --> 00:30:29,628 And then I'll check out his deck later. 635 00:30:31,163 --> 00:30:33,866 * * 636 00:30:39,972 --> 00:30:41,207 This must be where all the pee 637 00:30:41,307 --> 00:30:43,175 is collected for Pipi's streaming service. 638 00:30:43,275 --> 00:30:45,477 Sure is a lot of pee! 639 00:30:46,278 --> 00:30:47,746 This place is massive. They had to have 640 00:30:47,846 --> 00:30:49,615 been working on this place for years! 641 00:30:49,715 --> 00:30:51,417 Yeah, looks like someone has been planning 642 00:30:51,517 --> 00:30:53,419 on fucking my mom for a long time! 643 00:30:53,519 --> 00:30:56,422 Everyone spread out and see what you can find. 644 00:30:58,324 --> 00:30:59,926 What exactly are we looking for? 645 00:31:00,026 --> 00:31:03,029 Documents, contracts, condoms, whatever you can find. 646 00:31:03,129 --> 00:31:05,297 Get a picture of anything unusual. 647 00:31:05,397 --> 00:31:07,033 People would be very interested to see 648 00:31:07,133 --> 00:31:08,567 how far along this all is. 649 00:31:08,667 --> 00:31:11,803 Hey, there's some little brown chocolates on the floor. 650 00:31:17,076 --> 00:31:18,144 Chunk! 651 00:31:18,244 --> 00:31:20,479 (screaming) 652 00:31:20,579 --> 00:31:21,480 Whoa! 653 00:31:26,618 --> 00:31:30,389 It's okay. It's okay. We're not gonna hurt you. 654 00:31:31,190 --> 00:31:33,292 (quietly): Chuck Chuck? 655 00:31:35,027 --> 00:31:36,462 The fuck is that? 656 00:31:36,562 --> 00:31:37,896 What are you doing down here? 657 00:31:37,997 --> 00:31:39,498 Are you lost? 658 00:31:40,332 --> 00:31:42,201 Chuck Chuck. 659 00:31:43,769 --> 00:31:46,438 You guys, seriously, the fuck is that? 660 00:31:46,538 --> 00:31:49,175 It's like a little bear pig... 661 00:31:51,677 --> 00:31:53,879 They don't know you're down here, do they? 662 00:31:53,980 --> 00:31:56,315 Chuck Chuck. 663 00:31:56,415 --> 00:31:58,884 Hey, stop right there! 664 00:32:05,324 --> 00:32:08,827 -(alarm blaring) -(clamoring) 665 00:32:11,630 --> 00:32:14,166 Yeah, we did it! We did it! 666 00:32:14,266 --> 00:32:15,667 Tell the boss we caught 'em! 667 00:32:15,767 --> 00:32:17,403 We finally caught the little buggers 668 00:32:17,503 --> 00:32:19,905 that've been messing with the equipment down here. 669 00:32:22,441 --> 00:32:23,475 * * 670 00:32:23,575 --> 00:32:25,077 I'm Reese Witherspoon. 671 00:32:25,177 --> 00:32:26,678 I think crypto is a great idea 672 00:32:26,778 --> 00:32:29,415 but there's one investment that's even smarter. 673 00:32:29,515 --> 00:32:32,318 That's why when my family is enjoying festive party games, 674 00:32:32,418 --> 00:32:34,353 we do it in pee. 675 00:32:39,791 --> 00:32:41,260 (grunts) 676 00:32:42,661 --> 00:32:44,196 (gasping) 677 00:32:44,296 --> 00:32:46,265 (retching) 678 00:32:49,701 --> 00:32:51,037 FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Go pee! 679 00:32:51,137 --> 00:32:52,971 With Pipi+. 680 00:32:53,072 --> 00:32:54,773 (retching) 681 00:33:00,379 --> 00:33:01,813 Oh, hey, honey. 682 00:33:01,913 --> 00:33:03,582 -Any luck? -No. 683 00:33:03,682 --> 00:33:06,285 The plant is almost ready to go and I still can't figure out 684 00:33:06,385 --> 00:33:08,254 how to get the saltwater to it. 685 00:33:08,354 --> 00:33:10,722 The elevations are just too extreme. 686 00:33:10,822 --> 00:33:12,458 Hey, what are the kids doing? 687 00:33:12,558 --> 00:33:14,860 Mm, they're just in their rooms, hanging out. 688 00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:16,328 -Yeah? -Yeah. 689 00:33:16,428 --> 00:33:18,330 How about we round them up and go take a nice walk 690 00:33:18,430 --> 00:33:19,865 -or something. -You sure? 691 00:33:19,965 --> 00:33:22,768 Yeah, I need a break and they need a dad. Come on. 692 00:33:23,569 --> 00:33:24,736 (phone rings) 693 00:33:24,836 --> 00:33:26,672 Oh, hang on a second, it's Nelson. 694 00:33:26,772 --> 00:33:28,374 Hey, Nelson! How's it going up there? 695 00:33:28,474 --> 00:33:30,976 NELSON: Randy! Randy! 696 00:33:31,077 --> 00:33:32,744 The plant! 697 00:33:32,844 --> 00:33:34,113 It's all wrecked! 698 00:33:34,213 --> 00:33:35,314 What are you talking about? 699 00:33:35,414 --> 00:33:37,483 It was climate change, Randy! 700 00:33:37,583 --> 00:33:39,451 It ripped apart the watershed and took 701 00:33:39,551 --> 00:33:41,687 a huge shit in the conversion tanks! 702 00:33:41,787 --> 00:33:42,988 No. 703 00:33:43,089 --> 00:33:44,723 It just started tearing through people. 704 00:33:44,823 --> 00:33:48,827 But, Randy, it seemed like it was looking for something. 705 00:33:48,927 --> 00:33:52,164 I'm scared it might have been looking for you. 706 00:33:52,264 --> 00:33:54,800 (phone beeps) 707 00:33:57,169 --> 00:33:58,970 Randy, what's going on? 708 00:33:59,838 --> 00:34:01,473 What's going on, Dad? 709 00:34:01,573 --> 00:34:03,709 Take the kids to the basement and lock the door. 710 00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:06,145 Randy, what are we... 711 00:34:06,245 --> 00:34:08,714 Just do it, baby, please! 712 00:34:15,821 --> 00:34:18,124 Randy, I'm not gonna hurt you. 713 00:34:18,924 --> 00:34:20,692 What the fuck are you doing here?! 714 00:34:20,792 --> 00:34:23,462 I need your help, Randy. I can't go to the police. 715 00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:25,497 Yeah, no shit, 'cause you're a murderer! 716 00:34:25,597 --> 00:34:27,333 I didn't kill anyone! 717 00:34:27,433 --> 00:34:29,335 Look, I know we've had our differences. 718 00:34:29,435 --> 00:34:31,370 But I need you to trust me right now. 719 00:34:31,470 --> 00:34:33,605 I don't care about Credigree Weed anymore. 720 00:34:33,705 --> 00:34:35,307 I just want to fix the drought. 721 00:34:35,407 --> 00:34:37,309 You're not going to fix it because 722 00:34:37,409 --> 00:34:39,178 Pipi controls everything! 723 00:34:39,278 --> 00:34:40,612 Pipi? 724 00:34:40,712 --> 00:34:42,548 He used the water commissioner to get us 725 00:34:42,648 --> 00:34:44,750 to start our streaming war against each other. 726 00:34:46,152 --> 00:34:47,219 No. 727 00:34:47,319 --> 00:34:48,854 He used us, Randy. 728 00:34:48,954 --> 00:34:51,056 Pipi tried to have me killed but some little beaver thing 729 00:34:51,157 --> 00:34:52,524 saved me. Please. 730 00:34:52,624 --> 00:34:53,925 My wife said Tolkien and his friends 731 00:34:54,025 --> 00:34:55,561 went to look for me at the waterpark. 732 00:34:55,661 --> 00:34:58,130 Credigree and Tegridy have to work together. 733 00:35:00,532 --> 00:35:02,601 Tegridy took over my life 734 00:35:02,701 --> 00:35:05,337 and completely ruined my character. 735 00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:06,905 Don't you get it? 736 00:35:07,005 --> 00:35:10,442 We aren't the ones who are ever gonna help anything. 737 00:35:11,977 --> 00:35:14,413 We're the ones who make everything worse. 738 00:35:17,649 --> 00:35:19,185 (squeaking) 739 00:35:19,285 --> 00:35:23,189 (grunting) It's no use, we can't hack through the bars. 740 00:35:23,289 --> 00:35:27,092 Hey. Hey there. 741 00:35:30,329 --> 00:35:32,498 (quietly): Chuck Chuck. 742 00:35:33,299 --> 00:35:34,500 Hey. 743 00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:36,368 Are you down here looking for your dad? 744 00:35:36,468 --> 00:35:38,237 I'm looking for my dad, too. 745 00:35:38,337 --> 00:35:40,439 Oh, God, that's so cheesy. 746 00:35:42,007 --> 00:35:44,142 You don't have to be afraid of people. 747 00:35:44,243 --> 00:35:45,411 I can tell you why. 748 00:35:45,511 --> 00:35:47,413 (grunting softly) 749 00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:50,616 (flatulence) 750 00:35:52,484 --> 00:35:54,186 Chuck Chuck. 751 00:35:54,986 --> 00:35:56,755 Yes. Good, Tolkien, I think you're starting 752 00:35:56,855 --> 00:35:59,024 -to reason with it. -(heavy door opens) 753 00:36:01,927 --> 00:36:02,894 So! 754 00:36:02,994 --> 00:36:04,530 You're the little "sabotagis" 755 00:36:04,630 --> 00:36:06,332 that's been messing with my stuff, huh? 756 00:36:06,432 --> 00:36:09,601 Uh, no, we actually just got here recently, sir. 757 00:36:09,701 --> 00:36:12,538 -Where is my dad? -Your dad? 758 00:36:12,638 --> 00:36:14,273 -(snaps fingers) -Oh... 759 00:36:14,373 --> 00:36:17,643 You the boys that make-a the little boats-a. No? 760 00:36:17,743 --> 00:36:20,512 Oh, you help Pipi so much! 761 00:36:20,612 --> 00:36:23,482 You probably made a lot of money, huh? 762 00:36:24,483 --> 00:36:25,917 We didn't know what we were doing. 763 00:36:26,017 --> 00:36:28,887 (chuckles): Yeah, well, who does, huh? 764 00:36:28,987 --> 00:36:31,490 That's doing business in America. 765 00:36:31,590 --> 00:36:33,091 You just get in, 766 00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:36,295 fuck everything up, pay people money you don't have, 767 00:36:36,395 --> 00:36:39,698 and try to get a big market evaluation, yes? 768 00:36:39,798 --> 00:36:41,066 So you sped up climate change 769 00:36:41,166 --> 00:36:43,001 and then you fucked my mom, is that it? 770 00:36:43,969 --> 00:36:44,703 Scusi? 771 00:36:44,803 --> 00:36:46,305 No, see, what he did was 772 00:36:46,405 --> 00:36:47,539 he paid people too much money 773 00:36:47,639 --> 00:36:49,074 while actually devaluing the artists, 774 00:36:49,174 --> 00:36:51,109 creating a streaming business that was driving content 775 00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:53,011 instead of content driving the business. 776 00:36:53,111 --> 00:36:55,914 So now he's got a huge company but all he's delivering is piss. 777 00:36:56,014 --> 00:36:58,617 And now I'm about to have the only streaming service 778 00:36:58,717 --> 00:37:00,151 in the world. 779 00:37:00,252 --> 00:37:03,922 You see, I have all the celebrities here. 780 00:37:04,022 --> 00:37:08,860 Everybody to be in one big final commerci together! 781 00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,996 And when that commerci goes out, 782 00:37:11,096 --> 00:37:14,099 everybody gonna want to invest in Pipi. 783 00:37:14,900 --> 00:37:17,969 And you boys, well... I'm afraid you might meet up 784 00:37:18,069 --> 00:37:20,606 with a little accidente, eh? 785 00:37:20,706 --> 00:37:22,941 The pee-pee gonna come down 786 00:37:23,041 --> 00:37:26,211 and it gonna wash you boys away down a drain-ee. 787 00:37:26,312 --> 00:37:29,981 Come on! We gotta make-a the commerci! 788 00:37:31,417 --> 00:37:33,652 * * 789 00:37:40,959 --> 00:37:44,696 I'm sorry, guys. I got played. 790 00:37:44,796 --> 00:37:46,498 We all got played, Dad. 791 00:37:46,598 --> 00:37:48,133 The whole state. 792 00:37:48,233 --> 00:37:51,770 I really thought I could make a difference this time. 793 00:37:51,870 --> 00:37:54,940 Well, you can't, Randy. 794 00:37:56,041 --> 00:37:58,477 But there is someone who can. 795 00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:01,680 Somebody who can go down to that waterpark 796 00:38:01,780 --> 00:38:03,915 and demand to be heard. 797 00:38:04,750 --> 00:38:07,118 We need Karen back, Dad. 798 00:38:07,218 --> 00:38:08,454 What? 799 00:38:08,554 --> 00:38:10,422 No. No! 800 00:38:10,522 --> 00:38:11,923 You have to, Dad. 801 00:38:12,023 --> 00:38:13,692 Karen is the only one that can get past security 802 00:38:13,792 --> 00:38:15,494 and insist to see the management. 803 00:38:15,594 --> 00:38:18,229 Karen is gone. Okay? 804 00:38:19,331 --> 00:38:21,299 I'm never going back. 805 00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:22,934 Then Pipi does win. 806 00:38:23,034 --> 00:38:25,070 And we all go without fresh water for the rest of our lives. 807 00:38:25,170 --> 00:38:27,973 Come on, Karen, please. My friends are down there. 808 00:38:28,073 --> 00:38:30,275 It doesn't work like that. 809 00:38:30,376 --> 00:38:33,612 I didn't just become Karen overnight. 810 00:38:33,712 --> 00:38:35,280 First I smoked weed. 811 00:38:35,381 --> 00:38:36,815 Then I smoked too much weed. 812 00:38:36,915 --> 00:38:38,917 Then I started a weed farm and then I got entitled 813 00:38:39,017 --> 00:38:41,286 and did everything I could to protect it! 814 00:38:45,757 --> 00:38:48,660 But the weed is all gone now. 815 00:38:50,429 --> 00:38:51,863 Not all of it. 816 00:39:09,314 --> 00:39:12,484 The Thanksgiving Day Special? You saved this? 817 00:39:12,584 --> 00:39:14,886 I-I made this, like, three years ago. 818 00:39:14,986 --> 00:39:18,924 Yeah. I think it's the best special you ever made. 819 00:39:20,225 --> 00:39:22,260 * * 820 00:39:26,097 --> 00:39:31,102 If I smoke this... I won't remember any of you. 821 00:39:33,572 --> 00:39:37,242 It will be like none of the past few days ever happened. 822 00:39:38,243 --> 00:39:40,245 We have to have water, Karen. 823 00:39:43,148 --> 00:39:45,784 * * 824 00:40:02,267 --> 00:40:04,302 (magical chiming) 825 00:40:09,541 --> 00:40:11,777 (no audio) 826 00:40:13,745 --> 00:40:14,913 (muffled): What the hell is he doing? 827 00:40:15,013 --> 00:40:16,414 He looks ridiculous. 828 00:40:16,515 --> 00:40:18,850 Just-just let him do it, kids. 829 00:40:18,950 --> 00:40:19,851 (magical chiming) 830 00:40:19,951 --> 00:40:23,589 (humming, grunting) 831 00:40:23,689 --> 00:40:25,924 * * 832 00:40:30,161 --> 00:40:32,664 * We missed you, Karen * 833 00:40:32,764 --> 00:40:35,366 * Where have you been? * 834 00:40:35,467 --> 00:40:39,037 Someone's been fucking with my Tegridy! 835 00:40:39,137 --> 00:40:42,207 -Yeah! -Yeah, Dad! 836 00:40:42,307 --> 00:40:45,376 (applause) 837 00:40:45,477 --> 00:40:46,678 Thank you! 838 00:40:46,778 --> 00:40:48,980 Thank you, everyone, for coming 839 00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:52,283 to be a part of filming my new commerci. 840 00:40:52,383 --> 00:40:56,955 This is gonna be the best commerci we ever make-a! 841 00:40:58,423 --> 00:41:01,927 Okay, now everyone look like you're having fun! 842 00:41:02,027 --> 00:41:07,132 Background action! And action, Matt Damon-a! 843 00:41:07,966 --> 00:41:09,701 Hi. I'm Matt Damon. 844 00:41:09,801 --> 00:41:13,772 Me and all my Hollywood friends have a little secret to share. 845 00:41:13,872 --> 00:41:16,241 ALL: We love being in pee. 846 00:41:16,341 --> 00:41:17,709 Are you in? 847 00:41:17,809 --> 00:41:18,977 Okay, that's good, that's good. 848 00:41:19,077 --> 00:41:22,080 Now you all play in the pee a little bit. 849 00:41:22,881 --> 00:41:24,883 You laughing, you having fun. 850 00:41:24,983 --> 00:41:26,952 You splash-a the pee on each other. 851 00:41:29,154 --> 00:41:30,856 (groans) 852 00:41:30,956 --> 00:41:32,323 Good, good. You love the pee. 853 00:41:32,423 --> 00:41:34,560 Now maybe, Matt Damon, you splash pee 854 00:41:34,660 --> 00:41:35,927 on Reesie Witherspoon. 855 00:41:36,027 --> 00:41:38,163 And then, Reesie, the pee-- the pee make you 856 00:41:38,263 --> 00:41:41,199 so happy that-that you cry. 857 00:41:41,299 --> 00:41:42,668 I cry? 858 00:41:42,768 --> 00:41:45,270 Yes, Reesie, you so happy in the pee, it make you cry. 859 00:41:45,370 --> 00:41:49,541 And when you cry... you cry the pee. 860 00:41:49,641 --> 00:41:52,343 I can't cry pee. 861 00:41:52,443 --> 00:41:53,912 Oh, come on, Reesie. 862 00:41:54,012 --> 00:41:55,781 You slut yourself out for crypto, 863 00:41:55,881 --> 00:41:57,749 now just be a slut for Pipi. 864 00:41:57,849 --> 00:42:01,119 Go on, cry, Reesie. You're all a bunch of sellouts. 865 00:42:01,219 --> 00:42:03,555 Cry for the commerci. Come on, cry. 866 00:42:03,655 --> 00:42:05,757 (crying) 867 00:42:05,857 --> 00:42:08,193 (all crying) 868 00:42:10,596 --> 00:42:13,799 I'm sorry, folks, the waterpark is closed 869 00:42:13,899 --> 00:42:15,433 for a commercial shoot. 870 00:42:15,533 --> 00:42:17,736 We'll let you know as soon as we get things back open again. 871 00:42:17,836 --> 00:42:19,304 (tires screeching) 872 00:42:19,404 --> 00:42:21,640 * * 873 00:42:21,740 --> 00:42:24,042 (people screaming) 874 00:42:31,717 --> 00:42:33,685 It's Karen! 875 00:42:33,785 --> 00:42:37,322 I want in your waterpark right now! 876 00:42:37,422 --> 00:42:40,425 The park's closed, they're filming a commercial. 877 00:42:40,525 --> 00:42:42,560 I wanna speak to your... 878 00:42:42,661 --> 00:42:43,929 (reverberates): manager! 879 00:42:44,029 --> 00:42:46,164 -(people scream) -(glass shatters) 880 00:42:49,067 --> 00:42:50,669 PIPI: Good. Good. 881 00:42:50,769 --> 00:42:54,139 And now, Larry David, you come up with the pee in your mouth. 882 00:42:55,874 --> 00:42:59,611 And then you just, you just spit the pee on Gwyneth Paltrow. 883 00:43:01,747 --> 00:43:03,114 (retches) 884 00:43:03,214 --> 00:43:07,218 -(Randy yelling) -(people screaming) 885 00:43:10,421 --> 00:43:13,391 There you are! What's going on? 886 00:43:13,491 --> 00:43:15,927 You wanna tell me what the fuck is going on?! 887 00:43:16,027 --> 00:43:17,996 Scusi, who let you in? 888 00:43:18,096 --> 00:43:21,199 I let myself in because it's a free country 889 00:43:21,299 --> 00:43:23,434 and I'll stand where I fucking want! 890 00:43:23,534 --> 00:43:24,870 Get him out of here! 891 00:43:24,970 --> 00:43:26,371 Don't you fucking touch me! 892 00:43:26,471 --> 00:43:28,506 Don't any of you fucking touch me! 893 00:43:28,606 --> 00:43:31,409 Okay, we obviously have a bit of a Karen here, let's, uh... 894 00:43:31,509 --> 00:43:33,679 You can call me Karen all you fucking want! 895 00:43:33,779 --> 00:43:35,180 Motherfucker! 896 00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:36,782 Why don't you tell everyone what you've been doing?! 897 00:43:36,882 --> 00:43:40,151 (in distance): I want to speak to someone in charge! No! 898 00:43:40,251 --> 00:43:42,153 No, 'cause clearly you're not in charge! 899 00:43:42,253 --> 00:43:44,622 -What's going on up there? -You don't even know what the fuck you're doing! 900 00:43:44,723 --> 00:43:45,824 Do you?! 901 00:43:46,591 --> 00:43:49,594 -(clattering) -Hello? Who's there? 902 00:43:50,361 --> 00:43:53,732 Who's there? Goddamn it, I-I'm the fuckin' lifeguard. 903 00:43:53,832 --> 00:43:55,967 (whistle blows) 904 00:43:58,436 --> 00:44:00,038 (grunts) 905 00:44:03,675 --> 00:44:04,943 Whoa. 906 00:44:05,043 --> 00:44:07,645 No, you-you all need to get a life! 907 00:44:07,746 --> 00:44:09,514 I'm not wasted, you're wasted! 908 00:44:09,614 --> 00:44:13,351 Okay, fine, if you don't leave, I'm gonna call the police. 909 00:44:13,451 --> 00:44:14,552 Fuckin' do it! 910 00:44:14,652 --> 00:44:16,021 Fucking call the police! 911 00:44:16,121 --> 00:44:18,023 Bring 'em right here! Why don't you go back 912 00:44:18,123 --> 00:44:19,557 to your own fucking country?! 913 00:44:19,657 --> 00:44:21,559 -Oh, hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa. -Oh, whoa. 914 00:44:21,659 --> 00:44:24,395 Tom, it looks like after several days of nothing, 915 00:44:24,495 --> 00:44:27,432 a new Karen video has finally appeared on the Internet. 916 00:44:27,532 --> 00:44:30,101 A livestream caught Karen spewing the usual 917 00:44:30,201 --> 00:44:31,636 entitled hateful bullshit, 918 00:44:31,737 --> 00:44:33,939 and more and more viewers are tuning in! 919 00:44:34,039 --> 00:44:37,175 You probably don't even have a fucking green card, do you?! 920 00:44:37,275 --> 00:44:39,444 Okay. Please leave, okay? 921 00:44:39,544 --> 00:44:42,113 No! You leave! I'm an American! 922 00:44:42,213 --> 00:44:43,749 I pay taxes! 923 00:44:43,849 --> 00:44:47,185 -Okay, please-please leave. -No! You're a piece of shit 924 00:44:47,285 --> 00:44:49,721 who started the streaming wars on purpose 925 00:44:49,821 --> 00:44:51,689 to-to cause the drought! 926 00:44:53,224 --> 00:44:55,060 Okay-okay, that's it. 927 00:44:55,160 --> 00:44:57,395 Everybody, we're sorry for the disturbance. 928 00:44:57,495 --> 00:44:59,765 Yeah, and then you pay celebrities to get people 929 00:44:59,865 --> 00:45:01,332 to invest in your dumb shit 930 00:45:01,432 --> 00:45:03,668 'cause you know it's fucking dumb! 931 00:45:06,071 --> 00:45:09,908 Somebody get this Karen out of my face-y! 932 00:45:10,008 --> 00:45:11,843 (distant roaring) 933 00:45:11,943 --> 00:45:13,745 (people screaming) 934 00:45:13,845 --> 00:45:15,280 (roaring) 935 00:45:16,281 --> 00:45:19,617 Oh, you fucked now, Karen. 936 00:45:19,717 --> 00:45:22,620 Oh, look out! ManBearPig! 937 00:45:22,720 --> 00:45:25,090 (roaring) 938 00:45:25,190 --> 00:45:27,993 TOLKIEN: Dad? Dad! 939 00:45:28,093 --> 00:45:30,161 Dad, you're okay! 940 00:45:30,261 --> 00:45:33,264 Tolkien? Tolkien! 941 00:45:35,066 --> 00:45:36,401 * * 942 00:45:38,904 --> 00:45:41,372 * * 943 00:45:43,674 --> 00:45:45,076 Where did you come from?! 944 00:45:45,176 --> 00:45:47,212 We were busted out by our new friend. 945 00:45:47,312 --> 00:45:49,180 It's okay, you can come out. 946 00:45:54,719 --> 00:45:56,187 Chuck Chuck. 947 00:45:56,287 --> 00:45:58,256 What the fuck is that thing? 948 00:45:58,356 --> 00:46:01,092 I think I can explain it all. 949 00:46:02,127 --> 00:46:04,595 You see, for Pipi's plan to work, 950 00:46:04,695 --> 00:46:06,898 he needed to control climate change. 951 00:46:06,998 --> 00:46:11,169 And the only way to control anything, is by fucking its mom. 952 00:46:11,269 --> 00:46:13,371 But what Pipi didn't count on, 953 00:46:13,471 --> 00:46:16,174 was that a child will stop at nothing 954 00:46:16,274 --> 00:46:18,776 to find out who is fucking their mom. 955 00:46:20,846 --> 00:46:22,547 Chuck Chuck. 956 00:46:29,888 --> 00:46:32,657 See? I-I keep them safe, uh-huh. 957 00:46:32,757 --> 00:46:34,292 (growling) 958 00:46:34,392 --> 00:46:37,195 Whoa, whoa. Hold on a minute, ManBearBitchie. 959 00:46:37,295 --> 00:46:38,897 We have a great team, no? 960 00:46:38,997 --> 00:46:40,498 -(roaring) -(people screaming) 961 00:46:40,598 --> 00:46:44,102 You no wanna hurt Pipi. Look at everything we've done! 962 00:46:44,202 --> 00:46:45,904 (roaring) 963 00:46:46,004 --> 00:46:47,305 (screaming) 964 00:46:48,773 --> 00:46:50,775 (roaring) 965 00:46:50,876 --> 00:46:53,178 (gasping) 966 00:46:55,013 --> 00:46:56,681 (roaring) 967 00:46:56,781 --> 00:46:58,516 (Pipi gasping) 968 00:46:58,616 --> 00:46:59,784 (roars) 969 00:46:59,885 --> 00:47:02,087 I give you half of the company, huh?! 970 00:47:02,187 --> 00:47:03,788 What do you say, ManBearBitchie?! 971 00:47:03,889 --> 00:47:07,959 We can own the only streaming service in the world together! 972 00:47:08,059 --> 00:47:10,195 -(roaring) -(screaming) 973 00:47:13,999 --> 00:47:15,533 (squeaks) 974 00:47:16,667 --> 00:47:19,237 (squeaking) 975 00:47:19,337 --> 00:47:22,740 -It's over. We did it! -We did it, Dad! 976 00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:25,476 Randy. Thank you so much. 977 00:47:28,379 --> 00:47:31,282 Randy? What are you staring at? 978 00:47:31,382 --> 00:47:33,484 Oh, here we go again. 979 00:47:33,584 --> 00:47:35,786 No, wait. 980 00:47:36,787 --> 00:47:38,256 Mr.... Mr. Marsh? 981 00:47:38,356 --> 00:47:39,724 My eyes are up-- Dude! 982 00:47:39,824 --> 00:47:44,329 How to get saltwater to the desalinization plant. 983 00:47:45,163 --> 00:47:47,232 Saltwater-- saline. 984 00:47:47,332 --> 00:47:49,467 Saline in the plant. 985 00:47:49,567 --> 00:47:52,770 Saline implant! Holy fuck! 986 00:47:52,870 --> 00:47:56,341 (cheering) 987 00:47:57,808 --> 00:48:00,545 Today we try for a new beginning. 988 00:48:00,645 --> 00:48:04,515 You know, in police work, we don't always get it right. 989 00:48:04,615 --> 00:48:07,718 I wanted a deck in my hands so bad that I didn't care 990 00:48:07,818 --> 00:48:09,187 whose deck it was. 991 00:48:09,287 --> 00:48:10,989 But I'm happy to be standing here now 992 00:48:11,089 --> 00:48:13,358 with our new test subject. 993 00:48:13,458 --> 00:48:16,261 Thank you. I just want to say to my mom... 994 00:48:16,361 --> 00:48:18,596 Mom, I'm sorry. 995 00:48:18,696 --> 00:48:21,632 I'm sorry that I can't always be the son that you need. 996 00:48:21,732 --> 00:48:23,969 Because right now you need a son that can stay firm 997 00:48:24,069 --> 00:48:25,336 and teach you a lesson. 998 00:48:25,436 --> 00:48:28,940 But unfortunately, duty calls. I'm ready. 999 00:48:36,847 --> 00:48:38,616 Okay, hit it. 1000 00:48:40,952 --> 00:48:43,989 (gurgling) 1001 00:48:44,089 --> 00:48:46,357 * * 1002 00:48:46,457 --> 00:48:48,793 Okay, it works. Bring in the rest! 1003 00:48:52,930 --> 00:48:55,466 * * 1004 00:49:07,345 --> 00:49:09,580 (gurgling) 1005 00:49:13,018 --> 00:49:14,619 (gurgling) 1006 00:49:22,593 --> 00:49:24,595 We got Matt Damon to tell every woman 1007 00:49:24,695 --> 00:49:26,231 with fake tits to be brave! 1008 00:49:26,331 --> 00:49:28,266 Look at all of them. 1009 00:49:36,407 --> 00:49:38,676 It's working! 1010 00:49:38,776 --> 00:49:40,611 (cheering) 1011 00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:45,383 Hey, everybody! Look! 1012 00:49:51,656 --> 00:49:55,360 ManBearPig is leaving with PigBearGirl and Chuck Chuck. 1013 00:49:55,460 --> 00:49:58,096 (roars) 1014 00:49:58,196 --> 00:49:59,897 Chuck Chuck! 1015 00:50:06,871 --> 00:50:07,938 Hey, wait. 1016 00:50:08,039 --> 00:50:09,474 If that little thing 1017 00:50:09,574 --> 00:50:11,376 is gonna be climate change someday, 1018 00:50:11,476 --> 00:50:13,578 shouldn't we, like... kill it? 1019 00:50:14,945 --> 00:50:16,047 I think what we should do 1020 00:50:16,147 --> 00:50:17,282 is try to reach out to it, 1021 00:50:17,382 --> 00:50:18,716 see what it needs and see if it can 1022 00:50:18,816 --> 00:50:20,251 be different from its father. 1023 00:50:20,351 --> 00:50:22,620 Yeah, but that all sounds really hard. 1024 00:50:22,720 --> 00:50:25,490 We have enough water for the summer now. Fuck it. 1025 00:50:25,590 --> 00:50:27,692 Let's smoke some weed! 1026 00:50:27,792 --> 00:50:30,995 (cheering) 1027 00:50:31,096 --> 00:50:33,331 * * 1028 00:50:34,632 --> 00:50:36,867 (cheering continues) 1029 00:50:39,870 --> 00:50:41,906 * * 1030 00:51:11,902 --> 00:51:13,904 * *