Oops.
Beowulf. Um, spoiler alert, it's not even about a werewolf.
-Well, now I don't want it. -Yeah. You should try Animal Farm.
Now that's a book that lives up to its name.
Straight up it's just, like, animals on a farm.
Know what that reminds me of?
That guy who lived next to elementary school.
Uh, Mr. Landry. With the, uh, the chicken coops.
I… That was so long ago.
Yeah, it's kind of weird, we haven't really hung out since then.
It'd be fun to do something.
It'd be nice to be friends like that again.
Um, uh, yeah. Yeah, uh, friends.
Well, let me know, and we'll catch up later.
Hey, strawberry ghost.
-Feel pretty real today. -Yep.
Dude, you flinched.
You always win this game. We need a new game.
Looks like everyone's doing something new.
So, how many points you think new kid had on LaRusso today?
-Twenty? Thirty? Probably ten steals.
And that's not even counting stealing his girl.
Okay, screw you, dude. Seriously.
Easy, man. Just bustin' balls.
-What balls?
Hey!
-Oh my God, look!
Miggy, you've been at it since 6 a.m. That's a lot of stretching.
Yeah, tournament's in a month. Sensei's gonna be kicking our ass all week.
And you like that?
Yeah. I do.
-Hey, Johnny. -Hey.
Your student is ready for some intense training.
Oh, is he? All right, we'll see about that.
All right, let me… Oh, I forgot my water bottle in your car.
-Uh, the keys are on my nightstand. -Okay.
-I think we should tell him tonight. -Yeah. Okay.
Sure you're not gonna back out this time?
I wanted to make sure we did it right.
We'll take him to dinner. What's his favorite restaurant?
Uh, he likes Applebee's.
Ah, that's not gonna work.
-I had a little incident there once. -What happened?
All right, you know how they make that loaded potato soup?
-Yeah. -It's like--
Sensei.
I think this is yours.
Hey, Anthony? Hey. I found something in your room you need to explain.
Oh, um… Uh, yeah, I…
If this is you trying to seem cool at school
or rebel against me or something--
No. No, no, no. It's not mine. It's, uh… I'm holding it for a friend.
Okay, um, there's this kid in school who's, uh, who's in Cobra Kai.
He's been giving me a hard time recently.
Wait, giving you a hard time? Are you okay? What did they do?
Oh, uh, you know, just messing around, uh, name calling.
It's, uh, no big deal.
Anthony, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this.
Listen, I know what it feels like.
I promise I'm not gonna let Cobra Kai hurt you.
-It's… It's not that bad. Honestly, I-- -No.
I thought there might end up being a problem like this. I should've…
You're not a little kid anymore.
It's time. Go on up, get changed.
F-For what?
Just go upstairs, get changed.
So they stole all your clothes?
I can't take any more of their crap. I'm ready to use my training!
-What do you think you're gonna do? -I'll do what you do.
Kick their asses.
I got kicked out of school and landed in juvie.
You gotta be smarter than me and your brother.
Well, I gotta do something.
Class, fall in.
Today we have a very important lesson, don't we, Sensei Silver?
Yes, we do.
Weakness.
Your opponent's weakness must be exploited whenever possible.
At the tournament, you'll have to recognize that weakness.
And make no mistake, we all have one.
Sensei Kreese doesn't.
Of course he does. We all do.
Today, your goal is to find your opponent's weakness
and attack it.
No points. You hit the mat, you lose. You got it?
All right, prepare for combat.
-Care to make this interesting? -What do you have in mind?
Well, we each choose a fighter.
Six pack of brews to the winner.
I like it.
May the best sensei win.
-Here's the thing. -We wanted…
-You go. -No, you.
Someone should go.
So your mom and I are hooking up.
Not just hooking up.
Uh, you see, when two people…
When two people are…
attracted to each other--
-I get it, you guys are dating. -Yeah, we're dating. Yes.
Yes. We didn't mean for you to find out like this.
No. We were waiting for the right time and place.
We wanted to take you to a nice restaurant,
break the news somewhere nice.
A Chili's or a Marie Callender's. A Red Lobster.
Miggy, are you okay?
Yeah, I'm fine. Uh, I think.
Surprised.
But also not super surprised.
I would have chosen someone with, uh, better food in their refrigerator.
But other than that, Sensei's a good guy. As long as you're happy, I'm happy.
-We are. -We're very happy.
Cool.
Uh, can I get my water bottle now?
-Yes. -Okay.
-Piece of cake. Told you he'd be cool. -Oh, did you?
-Yeah. -Mm-hm.
Oh, I just hope it sticks.
-What does that mean?
It might take some time for Miguel to get used to the situation.
Let's just make sure we give him the room he needs to adjust.
Yeah.
You realize by giving me these
you've dramatically increased my odds of being stabbed to death.
Believe me, I'd rather be training to fight Tory.
We have to work on these skills if we wanna win.
Ready?
-Okay, this is pretty cool. -I thought you'd like it.
You never said I'd get to use weapons.
You don't. Not yet.
When Mr. Miyagi first showed me this place, I was like you.
I didn't know what to make of it all. Definitely didn't appreciate it.
I just knew I needed help defending myself.
I'm not gonna lie to you, Anthony. Learning karate isn't easy.
-It takes a lot of work. -Yeah.
But listen, think of it like a video game.
It might not be exciting at level one when you're learning the controls,
but the more you play, the more skills you get,
and before you know it, level 12.
You're hooked. Plus, I'll give you some of the cheat codes along the way. Come on.
-Hey, what's the WiFi? -What? There is no WiFi.
Put that thing away.
There are no distractions at Miyagi-Do.
Just you, your heart, and your mind.
So get ready to enter a world so much more exhilarating
than anything you will ever see on that phone.
-Are you ready to begin this journey? -Uh, yeah. Yeah.
Oh my God.
As you can see, I forgot to put the covers on when I left last night.
It's like a Jackson Pollock painting.
Anthony, get ready for your first Miyagi-Do lesson.
Today we call it "soap on, crap off."
I'm gonna show you exactly how to do it,
then you're gonna clean the cars while I help Mom at the dealership.
-How does that sound? -Honestly?
Remember, level one.
-Level one. -I'll get the bucket. It's gonna be fun.
Jesus…
Elswith.
Nichols.
All right. You've seen her fight before. What's her weakness?
-Her left. She telegraphs her kicks. -Then you know what to do this time.
Ais!
Just gonna dance or you gonna throw something?
Why not both?
-We should do that again sometime. -Don't get your hopes up.
Good one, Sensei Kreese. Who's next?
Listen up, nerds.
Today's gonna be a world of pain.
Now everyone fall in.
We have a new member joining us today.
This is Devon Lee,
our new female champion.
Hi. My pronouns are she/her.
The only pronouns we accept in this dojo are sensei and student.
-Those are nouns. -Oh, I'm sorry.
I think what I meant to say is "Quiet!"
-That's an imperative. -Get in line.
Today's lesson is about cheating.
At Eagle Fang Karate, we don't believe in fighting dirty.
Cobra Kai doesn't follow the same rules.
So we have to be ready for any dirty trick they throw at us.
Like when Chong Li threw dirt into Van Damme's eyes in Bloodsport.
Exactly. Looks like someone did their prep work.
And I saw the sequels too.
Not to mention Delta Force, Billy Jack, The Octagon, and Lady Dragon.
-Cynthia Rothrock is a beast. -Hell yeah, she is.
-I saw Last Dragon. -Shut the hell up, Penis Breath!
Everyone, get ready, I'm gonna put you through the wringer.
-Except for you, Diaz. Up here with me. -What?
The tournament's around the corner. Can't afford you getting hurt.
This is gonna get a little dangerous.
You be co-sensei today. Sound good?
Okay, everybody. Get ready.
Let's begin!
Cobra Kai pops out your shoulder, be ready to fight with one arm.
Like in Best of the Best!
That's too far back and you're overextending your kick.
-Try it ag-- -Ha!
-Not bad.
I pride myself on never making the same mistake twice.
I-I can do this, Sensei.
I know, but you're way above this beginner stuff.
Don't worry. You can help with the next lesson. All right?
-Shit, I can't see. -Use your other senses.
Not bad. It's all right, you'll get 'em next time.
No trick is too dirty, and no blow is too low for them.
We have to be ready for it.
Ha!
-Ha!
Ha!
-Ha!
I got him good on that one.
My McNuggets…
You feel like you're gonna vomit, swallow it.
They are wearing cups, right?
Good work, Mr. Park.
Thank you, Sensei.
Another one for me.
Double or nothing?
Okay.
Mr. Keene.
-Payne.
Ais!
-Ais!
-Ais! Ais!
Whoa, whoa. Hey. Are you okay?
Back to your corners.
I-I… I don't know what to do.
Robby doesn't have a weakness.
You're thinking about this the wrong way. Everyone has a weakness.
Stop playing with him.
Take him down.
Yes, Sensei.
Back on the mat.
Ais!
-Hey, K-Kenny. I'm… I'm sorry if--
Oh.
There. What did we learn?
The common belief is
you shouldn't care what other people think about you, right?
Wrong.
What your opponent is thinking is key.
In war.
In business.
In a fight.
Don't let your opponent think whatever they want.
Make them think what you want them to think.
If they think you're weak,
that's when you can surprise them with your strength.
Good job.
You owe me some brewskis, brother.
Good job today. Everyone ice up, we're back at it tomorrow.
Your mom wants us to have a family dinner tonight,
so don't be home too late.
-Must be nice being teacher's favorite. -Yeah. Is he gonna tuck you in?
He actually did it.
Huh.
-Hey, can I help you? -Yeah, almost done.
I'm just finishing up with the whitewalls.
-I'm sorry, who are you? -I'm, uh--
Hey, Artie. Uh, we're out of lemon lime but we've got tons of glacial fr--
Dad. Dad, hey. You're, uh, back early.
Okay, what's going on here? Who is this?
I'm a TaskRabbit, I have a request to wash these four cars.
You paid someone to clean the cars? How?
Um…
You set up my Apple Pay with your card.
That was for that one purchase, Anthony. Not to use anytime you wanted.
I know. Okay? I-I'm sorry.
I just… You know, I guess I just d-didn't want to do it.
Me neither. My cat needs surgery so I got to side hustle.
Okay, could you just please leave?
Thank you.
I can't believe this.
Anthony, you can't just pay people to do the hard work.
Part of growing up is to learn how to accomplish something on your own.
I know.
If Mr. Miyagi was here, you know what he would say right now?
-I don't care. -What?
All you ever do is talk about Mr. Miyagi. Okay, I get it.
He was a great man, he taught you karate
and he taught Sam her first move, the wax on, wax off, okay.
I've heard all the stories, and I'm getting sick of it.
Oh, you're sick of it.
So you don't wanna learn how to defend yourself.
To learn how to use skills that will help you in life.
-Not if it means cleaning up bird shit. -Hey, language.
You know, I thought you were mature enough to appreciate all this, but I
guess I was wrong.
Just go back to your video games.
Why is he so late?
I'm sure it's fine.
I'm gonna kill him when he gets here.
Maybe I should go.
What? No. I need you to have my back.
When my mom's boyfriends tried to discipline me, I didn't wanna hear it.
-I don't want him to think I'm an asshole. -Johnny, things are different now.
-Hey. Oh. -Where have you been?
You have to tell me when you're gonna be late.
-Sorry, I lost track of time. -He lost track of time.
Which is very irresponsible, and you can't worry your mom like that.
I was hanging out with Sam.
See? He was hanging out with his girlfriend. I get it.
-We just want you to be safe. Right? -Right. We want you to be safe.
-Okay. -Always wear protection.
-What? No. -What?
-No? No, don't wear protection. -Johnny…
-Uh, you let the girl decide that. -Just stop it.
At first I thought it was a little weird that you two were together
but I figured I would just, I don't know, get over it
because I wanted you to be happy, but…
You said nothing was gonna change.
Now everything has changed. It's weird at class, it's weird here. I'm over it.
Protection?
The new champion,
Daniel LaRusso!
All right, LaRusso. Let's see your moves.
Bust out some of that Miyagi shit. Come on, LaPusso.
-What are you doing? -Sorry. I was just, uh, looking around.
There's no need to apologize. I'm just surprised to see you in here.
-That's pretty cool, right? -What is it?
That's a technique that I hope none of us will ever need to use.
Be careful with this, okay?
I thought you didn't care about any of this stuff.
You know, it's just, uh…
You know, everybody has these amazing memories of Mr. Miyagi,
and, um,
you know, I never really knew the guy
or learned any of his cool moves. It's just… You know, I've always felt, um…
Out of the loop?
Yeah.
Know what I'll never forget?
When you were born,
we brought you home from the hospital and Mr. Miyagi wanted to pick you up.
I remember he was holding you in his arms, and you know what you did?
What?
Kicked him in the face.
-I did? -Yep.
It was the first time I ever saw anyone land a kick on him.
You got him pretty good too.
Yeah, Mr. Miyagi just laughed. He said that you were gonna be a handful.
And that someday you'd also be the one who'd be protecting this family.
Really?
Look, Anthony…
I don't want to pressure you into doing anything you don't wanna do.
I was just hoping that maybe you might wanna
learn a little bit more about what this all means.
You know? And to be able to defend yourself against this bully.
What? What is it?
Um, nothing.
Yeah, just, uh, don't worry about this Cobra Kai kid.
Yeah, uh, I'll handle it.
-Are you sure? -Yeah. But, uh, thanks, Dad.
All right.
It's like a Jekyll and Hyde situation.
I was used to Sensei being like Mr. Hyde, now it's like he's a different person.
At least you had some training.
Dad spent all day with my brother. I had to babysit the Miyagi-Dos.
Meanwhile Tory is gaining ground.
Whatever my dad's plan is, it isn't working.
Miguel. There you are. I've been looking all over for you.
-What are you doing here? -Field trip. You and me, let's go.
It's the middle of a school day. I have history. I--
History's for nerds. Play hooky with me.
I'll write a doctor's note, used to work for me. Come on, what do you say?
-Okay. -All right, great.
Don't worry, I'll bring him back in one piece.
-Hey, Ant, what's up? -Hey, um, not much.
So, um, I thought of something we can do.
There's this fair at Westwood Park.
It's got all these rides, and, better yet, fried Oreos.
Fried Oreos, you are speaking my language.
I've invited a bunch of people.
Kenny says the pirate ship goes upside down.
I mean, totally vertical.
Um, Kenny?
Oh, yeah. He's hilarious. You guys are gonna get along great.
Um, see you Saturday. Hey, Jane, wait up.
Ow. That's gotta hurt.
What do you want?
I've been thinking about everything. I just wanna talk.
Maybe we could try starting over?
I've got nothing to say to you, LaPusso.
Oh!
-Oh.
Call me that one more time and you'll regret it.
Sorry, I forgot you were so sensitive about that.
LaPusso.
Get him!
Where is he?
Doesn't matter. He's trapped.
-What? -What the hell?
Come on. Let's find him.
Marcus?
What was that?
-Yah!
Guys?
LaPusso.
I finally got you alone.
Hey!
What's going on in here?
What, you don't like watermelon?
No, I like watermelon.
I just thought when you had me cut class
that we'd be training, not having another awkward conversation.
It doesn't have to be awkward.
Look, if I'm acting a little weird,
it's only because I don't have any experience with this.
Ask me anything about karate or '80s rock or Rowdy Roddy Piper, I'm your guy,
but when it comes to, you know, this?
I guess I freaked out.
That's what happened with Robby, right?
You got afraid?
Yeah.
But I never told you why.
My dad left when I was in kindergarten.
I barely remember him. My mom did everything she could.
Married a rich prick, thinking that would be a good idea.
It only made me miss my dad more.
I couldn't figure out why this was all happening.
You know, I felt so…
Cheated.
Yeah.
You ever go out and try to find him?
I don't even know what I'd say.
Maybe you could ask why he left.
Hear his side of the story.
No. I don't even know where I'd begin looking for him.
If I'm being honest, I'm still too afraid to find out the truth.
The point is
I didn't have a male role model growing up.
Till I met Kreese, and you know how that went.
And I didn't want to be like him. Or Sid. Or my own dad.
And I took all that bullshit I felt from them and I put it on Robby's life.
I can never fix that.
I don't wanna make that mistake again.
Clearly, I don't know what I'm doing.
I mean, yeah, some things are gonna change with you and my mom being together.
And it feels kinda weird to say it out loud, but…
there's also a lot of things that I want to stay the same.
Yeah, like what?
Like you being my sensei.
-Yeah? -Yeah!
All right.
You asked for it.
What's with the watermelons?
One of the most badass kicks in all of karate
is the flying tornado.
I wasn't sure if you were ready for it. It's a pain in the ass to master, but…
-You don't mind a little pain, do you? -No, Sensei.
Neither do I.
Nice place you got here, but it could definitely use a woman's touch.
Does your dad know you're here?
I told him I should be learning both styles.
So that's what I'm gonna do.
I can't believe this is happening again. First Sam, now Anthony?
Don't worry, he'll be safe.
We'll make sure the kid who did this does not get off lightly.
Hey, Anthony. Are you okay?
Mr. and Mrs. LaRusso, come on in.
You can have a seat here.
We're not sure what happened--
But whatever it is, we expect there to be a severe punishment for this.
Oh, there will be.
I've already spoken to the parents of the other offending students.
We're going to be suspending them.
-Okay. -And your son.
What? None of this is Anthony's fault.
Well, I'm afraid we have proof.
Turns out this isn't the first time.
Don't know how they got that milk in the locker.
Anthony and the others have been cyberbullying Mr. Payne for some time.
I've seen enough evidence to conclude that Anthony has been a real bully this year.
I got you.
A man of his word.
Whoa, are those Ba Muoi Ba?
Old 33s. They've changed a bit since the war.
To the victor go the spoils.
Sweet!
Hello!
-You know who those remind me of? -Huh?
Scovil.
The good old boy from Utah.
Yeah.
Yeah, never washed his ass. Could smell him coming a mile away.
Remember the day we were on patrol,
and he took it upon himself to jump rank and take point?
Yeah, crazy bastard.
Wound up walking directly into a minefield.
Blew himself to kingdom come.
That's the kind of story I'd rather forget.
We don't have the luxury of forgetting.
Nor should we.
We should remember
what happens to soldiers who don't follow their leader.
Johnny, look, is this about--
Quiet! I'm not done speaking, Lieutenant.
The other day when we were teaching,
you told the students that I have a weakness.
-I said everyone has a weakness. -You specifically talked about me.
And it made me wonder…
what do you think my weakness is?
Look, it was just a lesson for the class.
You're afraid to tell me.
Do you remember the cage?
We both thought we were gonna die.
No, no, no.
I wasn't afraid.
I'll go.
You were.
You were like a puddle of piss.
If it wasn't for me, you'd still be back in that pit.
Correct?
Yes.
I'm the one who got you out of that cage then,
only to find you in another one that you created for yourself.
I always looked out for you, Terry.
And I always will.
But you need to fall back in line
and follow my lead.
Because there's a lot of land mines out there,
and if you don't watch where you step…
it's all gonna blow up.
You don't mind, do you?
No, Captain.
No.