1
00:00:02,086 --> 00:00:04,797
Please, please, please.
Okay, what is this?

2
00:00:04,881 --> 00:00:07,192
We're making sure I'm tall enough
to ride all the rides at Disneyland...

3
00:00:07,216 --> 00:00:08,676
Without having
to spike up my hair.

4
00:00:08,759 --> 00:00:11,304
Buddy, we are good to go.

5
00:00:11,387 --> 00:00:13,198
- — Sweet!
- I have been waiting for this day...

6
00:00:13,222 --> 00:00:17,018
Ever since the doctor pointed to the
ultrasound of your mom's womb and said,

7
00:00:17,101 --> 00:00:18,978
“either that's a fifth limb”...

8
00:00:19,061 --> 00:00:20,521
Okay, no. Gross.

9
00:00:20,605 --> 00:00:22,982
All right. I want everybody
to eat a lot at home...

10
00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:25,026
Because
the happiest place on earth...

11
00:00:25,109 --> 00:00:27,486
Is also home to the most
expensive churro on earth.

12
00:00:27,570 --> 00:00:31,532
Come on. This is gonna be awesome.
Who doesn't love a day at Disneyland?

13
00:00:31,616 --> 00:00:33,242
Can't you and mom go without me?

14
00:00:33,326 --> 00:00:35,620
You're the kid.
I think we need you to get in.

15
00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:37,288
Well, it couldn't come
on a worse day.

16
00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:39,081
The technology sector
is tanking.

17
00:00:39,165 --> 00:00:42,543
We're doing a stock market project
in school, and today's the last day.

18
00:00:42,627 --> 00:00:44,879
We all get a thousand
fake dollars to invest,

19
00:00:44,962 --> 00:00:46,631
and as of
market close yesterday,

20
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,382
I'm in the lead.

21
00:00:48,466 --> 00:00:50,885
I may not be the tallest
or the most athletic,

22
00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:52,887
but someday
I will be the richest.

23
00:00:52,970 --> 00:00:55,139
Which is good,
because the ladies love that.

24
00:00:55,223 --> 00:00:58,142
And I've grown accustomed
to a certain lifestyle.

25
00:00:58,226 --> 00:01:00,507
Do you really want girls
who only want you for your money?

26
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:02,772
I'd like to have that option.

27
00:01:02,855 --> 00:01:06,275
Manny, put the stock away
and put your ears on.

28
00:01:06,359 --> 00:01:08,527
Mom, I don't think
you have to wear one of these.

29
00:01:08,611 --> 00:01:10,363
Be a kid! Put them on!

30
00:01:10,488 --> 00:01:13,491
Really? Those shoes? What?

31
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:16,619
Do you know how much walking
you have to do at Disneyland?

32
00:01:16,702 --> 00:01:19,163
Why do you think they have
so many fat people on scooters?

33
00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:21,332
I like wearing the high heels.
I'm fine.

34
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:25,044
This is just like that jacket you refuse
to bring when I say, “take a jacket.”

35
00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:27,272
“Don't tell me what to do! I'm fine!”

36
00:01:27,296 --> 00:01:29,548
Huh? And you're not fine.
You're cold and shivering,

37
00:01:29,632 --> 00:01:32,218
and I look like thejerk
who won't give his wife a jacket.

38
00:01:32,301 --> 00:01:34,095
So I do.
And then I'm cold and shivering,

39
00:01:34,178 --> 00:01:35,680
and I brought a jacket.

40
00:01:35,763 --> 00:01:38,391
Are you done with
your boring jacket story?

41
00:01:38,474 --> 00:01:39,976
Because we're going
to hit traffic.

42
00:01:40,059 --> 00:01:43,437
I'll tell you one thing.
I'm not gonna give you my shoes.

43
00:01:43,521 --> 00:01:46,524
Ah! That must be Ethan.

44
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,651
Who's Ethan? Didn't I tell you?

45
00:01:48,734 --> 00:01:51,153
My friend bethenny's nephew
is coming with us today.

46
00:01:51,237 --> 00:01:53,114
He moved to town
to go to college.

47
00:01:53,197 --> 00:01:55,950
He's very nice, very smart—
Big hockey player.

48
00:01:56,075 --> 00:01:58,744
I know what you're doing.
Really? She was so subtle.

49
00:01:58,828 --> 00:02:02,873
Haley has a thing for bad boys,
which was so me.

50
00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:04,792
Clearly.

51
00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:07,295
So, if she's going to be
leaving the nest soon,

52
00:02:07,378 --> 00:02:09,378
we'd prefer it was not
on the back of a motorcycle.

53
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:12,133
My college roommate
had a motorcycle. Mmm.

54
00:02:12,216 --> 00:02:14,885
Man, I had some good times
on the back of that thing.

55
00:02:16,512 --> 00:02:19,032
Can't believe you did this.
I'm not gonna babysit bethenny's nephew.

56
00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:21,475
Alex can have him. Okay,
I don't need your rejects.

57
00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:23,352
Hi, Ethan! Hi.

58
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:25,730
I'm so glad you could make it.
Thanks for inviting me.

59
00:02:25,855 --> 00:02:27,857
Sure. Hi. I'm ai...

60
00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:30,359
My 14—year—old sister.
Ethan, was it?

61
00:02:30,443 --> 00:02:33,029
Yeah.

62
00:02:33,779 --> 00:02:35,656
,/' hey, heyj

63
00:02:35,740 --> 00:02:37,742
,/' hey, heyj

64
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:39,785
,/' hey, heyj

65
00:02:39,869 --> 00:02:41,662
,/' hey, heyj

66
00:02:41,746 --> 00:02:42,913
j“ hey if

67
00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:47,793
And that's my grandpa
and his wife, Gloria,

68
00:02:47,877 --> 00:02:49,337
and her son, Manny.

69
00:02:49,420 --> 00:02:51,005
Wow. You guys have a big family.

70
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,507
Big family.

71
00:02:54,425 --> 00:02:56,135
She likes him!
Yeah, who wouldn't?

72
00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:57,988
Where'd you find him,
a Tommy hilfiger catalog?

73
00:02:58,012 --> 00:03:00,848
He got a 2200 on his s.A.T.'S.

74
00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:02,391
And those eyes.

75
00:03:02,475 --> 00:03:04,155
Okay. Did you get him
for Haley or for you?

76
00:03:04,226 --> 00:03:05,686
Mitchell.

77
00:03:05,770 --> 00:03:08,123
You know, I haven't been here
since dad brought us when we were kids.

78
00:03:08,147 --> 00:03:09,774
Oh, yeah. Remember?

79
00:03:09,857 --> 00:03:11,859
You cried in
the Abraham Lincoln thing.

80
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:15,988
Hey, he was a great president,
and it was the first robot I ever saw.

81
00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:19,992
When Claire and Mitchell were young, their
mom and I were gonna take them to Disneyland.

82
00:03:20,076 --> 00:03:23,287
But that morning, dede and I got in
this huge fight over something or other...

83
00:03:23,371 --> 00:03:24,872
Surprise, surprise...

84
00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:27,583
And I ended up
taking them on my own.

85
00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:30,461
Claire's biggest fear
was running into the evil queen.

86
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:33,756
My biggest fear
was that I married her.

87
00:03:33,839 --> 00:03:38,260
Okay, people over 46 inches,
first stop— Indiana Jones!

88
00:03:38,386 --> 00:03:41,138
Have fun on the teacups,
Lily. Okay, let's do this.

89
00:03:41,222 --> 00:03:43,808
Oh, okay, wait.
Just a second here, everybody.

90
00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:46,143
All right.

91
00:03:47,311 --> 00:03:49,563
Is that a leash?
No, it's a child safety tether.

92
00:03:49,647 --> 00:03:51,148
This way, sweetie.

93
00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:53,943
It— it's a leash.
Don't— don't judge us.

94
00:03:54,026 --> 00:03:56,320
Go on.

95
00:03:56,445 --> 00:03:58,864
We have a runner. Lily
is going through a phase...

96
00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:01,867
At least— oh, we hope it's a phase.
She bolts every chance she gets.

97
00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:03,744
Lily.

98
00:04:03,828 --> 00:04:05,454
Lily!

99
00:04:05,538 --> 00:04:07,331
Lily!

100
00:04:07,415 --> 00:04:10,042
So we had no choice but to put her
on a child safety tether.

101
00:04:10,126 --> 00:04:11,585
It's a leash.

102
00:04:11,669 --> 00:04:14,004
And we did have a choice.

103
00:04:15,214 --> 00:04:17,550
Lily, sweetie, don't pull.

104
00:04:17,675 --> 00:04:19,760
Lily, heel! Dad.

105
00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:22,531
If I'd have known you guys were
gonna do this, I'd have brought Stella.

106
00:04:22,555 --> 00:04:24,435
It was cam's idea. So
much for the united front.

107
00:04:24,515 --> 00:04:26,934
I'll have you know,
despite all yourjokes, Lily enjoys it.

108
00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:29,913
Okay, sweetie.
You're not helping.

109
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:31,939
Oh, my god. Oh, my god.
You guys— is that Dylan?

110
00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:33,566
What? Aw, geez.

111
00:04:33,691 --> 00:04:36,277
Dylan? Oh. Hey!

112
00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:39,155
Uh, what are you—
I didn't even know you were in town.

113
00:04:39,238 --> 00:04:42,074
Either did I...
Know you were in town.

114
00:04:42,158 --> 00:04:43,659
This town. Anaheim.

115
00:04:43,742 --> 00:04:45,619
I thought you were
still in Wyoming.

116
00:04:45,703 --> 00:04:49,373
I was, uh, but, um...

117
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:51,876
Oh, shoot. You know, I, uh,
gotta meet up with some friends,

118
00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:53,669
and I'm... really late.

119
00:04:54,879 --> 00:04:57,465
It was nice to see you, Haley,
and everybody.

120
00:04:57,548 --> 00:04:59,008
Hi.

121
00:04:59,091 --> 00:05:01,760
- — And dude I don't know.
- I'm Ethan. It's nice to meet you.

122
00:05:01,844 --> 00:05:03,929
And polite dude I don't know.

123
00:05:08,100 --> 00:05:10,019
Did Haley used to date
that guy or something?

124
00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:13,147
Yep. You date her,
that's the club you're joining.

125
00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:15,649
Of course he would
still look amazing.

126
00:05:15,733 --> 00:05:17,860
Does he? I hadn't noticed.

127
00:05:17,943 --> 00:05:20,738
Did you know
that Ethan plays the trumpet?

128
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,741
No great surprise
with those lips of his, huh?

129
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:26,619
Coo—coo—ca-choo, Mrs. Robinson.

130
00:05:26,702 --> 00:05:28,704
Okay, buddy, moment of truth.

131
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,541
Yes! Yes! Whoo!

132
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:35,878
This is gonna be so awesome!
Yeah!

133
00:05:39,131 --> 00:05:42,510
In 45 minutes,
this is gonna be so awesome!

134
00:05:42,593 --> 00:05:44,428
Yeah!

135
00:05:47,348 --> 00:05:50,017
Look, Reuben, I have
some underperformers I have to unload,

136
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:52,144
and I don't have access
to a computer.

137
00:05:52,228 --> 00:05:54,939
Log in as “money delgado.”
Manny!

138
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:57,650
By all means, Reuben,
go get a Popsicle while the nikkei closes.

139
00:05:57,775 --> 00:05:59,443
I want to be a pauper. Come on.

140
00:05:59,527 --> 00:06:01,403
Mom, my stocks just took a dive.

141
00:06:01,487 --> 00:06:03,656
Your phone is about
to take a dive.

142
00:06:03,739 --> 00:06:05,366
Come on!
Where do we want to go next?

143
00:06:05,449 --> 00:06:07,576
Oh! Ethan and I want to try
the haunted mansion.

144
00:06:07,660 --> 00:06:09,161
There is no “you and Ethan.”

145
00:06:09,245 --> 00:06:11,288
Let's go to the jungle cruise.
It's right there.

146
00:06:11,372 --> 00:06:12,998
Why? Tired of walking
in those heels?

147
00:06:13,082 --> 00:06:16,168
No. You tired of being
with a hot wife?

148
00:06:18,295 --> 00:06:21,840
Well, well, well. What do you know? Another
caring parent with a child safety tether.

149
00:06:21,924 --> 00:06:23,644
See? We're not
the only people who use them.

150
00:06:23,676 --> 00:06:26,387
Hi! Aren't they adorable?
Oh, and look at your cutie!

151
00:06:26,470 --> 00:06:28,305
Oh, well, yes.
She just wanted to say hi.

152
00:06:28,389 --> 00:06:30,099
Oh. Sorry.
They're a little feisty today.

153
00:06:30,182 --> 00:06:33,060
- Oh! No problem. She's friendly.
- Oh. Rex, gentle.

154
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,563
- Oh. His name's Rex, huh?
- Yeah.

155
00:06:35,646 --> 00:06:37,523
Okay. Lily. No, sweetie—
Lily, um...

156
00:06:37,648 --> 00:06:39,876
Sorry. He just gets excited.
Oh, yeah, no— oh, no problem.

157
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:41,819
Lily, stop moving, sweetie.
Stop moving.

158
00:06:41,944 --> 00:06:44,863
Okay, you got this. Okay.
Okay, good girl! Good girl! Sorry.

159
00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:50,244
You know what the fight
with dede was about?

160
00:06:50,327 --> 00:06:53,914
I taped a football game
over an episode of Dallas.

161
00:06:53,998 --> 00:06:58,002
Who bails on a family trip to Disneyland
over something like that?

162
00:06:58,085 --> 00:07:00,713
Ironically, Dallas
was playing in the game.

163
00:07:00,796 --> 00:07:03,007
And I remember
pointing that out to her,

164
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:06,218
and then I remember
a videocassette flying at my head.

165
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:09,555
You do not play the cello. I
do. Even geekier— I'm good.

166
00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:12,349
Okay, answer me this—
I will answer you this.

167
00:07:12,433 --> 00:07:14,685
Why do people
carry cellos around?

168
00:07:14,768 --> 00:07:17,021
You know, people aren't expected
to lug a piano around.

169
00:07:17,146 --> 00:07:18,606
What's the cutoff?
I know, right?

170
00:07:18,689 --> 00:07:21,609
Like, go where the cello is.

171
00:07:21,692 --> 00:07:26,447
Oh, look at this. I think I've inadvertently
set up my 14-year-old with a college boy.

172
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:28,073
The boy was your doing? Yes.

173
00:07:28,157 --> 00:07:31,327
Yes, and he was perfect,
and Haley was into him,

174
00:07:31,410 --> 00:07:33,037
until, of course,
we ran into Dylan.

175
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,348
I mean, come on, dad.
What are the odds of that happening?

176
00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:36,874
It's a small world. Yes, it is.

177
00:07:36,999 --> 00:07:39,501
See what I did there? It's
a ride. I did. Got it. I got it.

178
00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:42,838
It's just so frustrating because
I know I can't run Haley's life for her,

179
00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:46,008
but if she would let me,
I would be so good at it.

180
00:07:46,091 --> 00:07:49,011
Right, 'cause parents
always know what's best for their kids.

181
00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:51,865
You remember that nice girl at the office
I tried to fix Mitch up with?

182
00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,390
No offense, dad, but I think...

183
00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:56,477
I probably have a better sense
of what my kids need than you did.

184
00:07:56,602 --> 00:07:59,188
I think it's cute
you think that. Oh.

185
00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:02,524
Mom! It was so awesome!

186
00:08:02,608 --> 00:08:06,153
The Jeep was jerking around, and— and there
was a lot of sharp turns and big drops.

187
00:08:06,278 --> 00:08:07,738
Uh—huh. Uh—huh.
It just kept going.

188
00:08:07,863 --> 00:08:10,991
Wow. You okay?
Great. Why wouldn't I be?

189
00:08:11,116 --> 00:08:14,620
Because you're kind of leaning
on me. Isn't that what a marriage is?

190
00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:16,955
Oh, Alex, stop touching him.

191
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,333
You look like hell.

192
00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:20,959
Fee! A little dizzy.

193
00:08:21,043 --> 00:08:22,523
I think that ride
did something to me.

194
00:08:22,586 --> 00:08:24,171
Fluid in your inner ear
is thickening.

195
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:26,131
That's what happens
when you get old. It is?

196
00:08:26,215 --> 00:08:28,175
Yeah, you can't take the motion.

197
00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:30,678
I gotta pop a dramamine
to get in my swivel chair.

198
00:08:30,761 --> 00:08:33,806
That is not it.
I'm king of the roller coasters.

199
00:08:33,931 --> 00:08:37,226
I think I just put too big of a whipped
cream smile on my pancake this morning.

200
00:08:37,351 --> 00:08:40,911
You guys wanna go on matterhorn? Luke, I think
me and your dad are gonna sit this one out,

201
00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:42,439
maybe get one of them
big pickles.

202
00:08:42,523 --> 00:08:45,484
No! You're gonna have to eat
that pickle on your own, Jay.

203
00:08:45,567 --> 00:08:47,486
I still got
a few good years left.

204
00:08:47,569 --> 00:08:50,447
Luke, wait up!
I'll race you there!

205
00:08:53,117 --> 00:08:54,618
I'm good. I'm good.

206
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,767
Okay, everybody's looking at us.

207
00:09:00,791 --> 00:09:04,145
I haven't been judged by this many people
since I forgot my canvas bags at whole foods.

208
00:09:04,169 --> 00:09:06,439
Yeah. Well, maybe they're staring
because we have what they want.

209
00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:08,632
Wh— oh, a pet daughter. Is that...

210
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:10,276
You know, I don't care
what people think.

211
00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:11,820
If I thought it would
keep my daughter safe,

212
00:09:11,844 --> 00:09:13,697
I would have a kangaroo pouch
sewn into my midriff.

213
00:09:13,721 --> 00:09:16,557
That's gonna work out
really well for you as a single parent.

214
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:18,767
Okay, we just got a glare
from Mr. Socks-with-sandals.

215
00:09:18,851 --> 00:09:20,310
All right. That's it.

216
00:09:20,436 --> 00:09:22,796
Lily, I'm gonna take off this
leash. I think it's a mistake.

217
00:09:22,855 --> 00:09:25,583
But I don't want you to run away,
'cause that would be very, very unsafe.

218
00:09:25,607 --> 00:09:30,070
And if we lost you, you'd be very scared,
and we'd be very sad, okay?

219
00:09:30,195 --> 00:09:31,655
Okay. All right.

220
00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:35,159
See, cam? You treat her
like a human being, and she acts like one.

221
00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:36,535
Chip 'n' Dale!

222
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:39,329
Oh, great.
Now she's chasing squirrels. Lily!

223
00:09:39,455 --> 00:09:41,874
Honey, come on! Lily! Lily!

224
00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:50,591
- — Hey, how was splash mountain?
- It was great. Maybe we go again.

225
00:09:50,674 --> 00:09:52,676
No, thanks.
There was no reception in there.

226
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:54,845
You know how many bars I had?
Zip-a-Dee-doo-dah.

227
00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:56,930
Reuben, talk to me!

228
00:09:57,014 --> 00:09:59,933
Must be nice to
get out of those shoes for a minute.

229
00:10:00,017 --> 00:10:01,810
I don't know what
you're talking about.

230
00:10:01,894 --> 00:10:03,479
Nothing. I'm just
making conversation.

231
00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:05,564
Hey. Check it out.

232
00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:10,402
I bought one of those souvenir photos
with you and Manny on the ride.

233
00:10:10,486 --> 00:10:12,529
Boy, it looks like
you're having a good time.

234
00:10:12,613 --> 00:10:14,615
Wait a minute.
What's that in your hand?

235
00:10:14,698 --> 00:10:16,200
Are those shoes?

236
00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,035
I'm not even sure
that that is us, Jay.

237
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:19,661
Why are you
walking around in pain?

238
00:10:19,745 --> 00:10:21,914
Just admit the shoes
were a bad idea.

239
00:10:21,997 --> 00:10:23,582
I am not in pain.

240
00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:27,252
I just didn't want my favorite
walking shoes to get wet there.

241
00:10:27,336 --> 00:10:29,046
Okay. My bad.

242
00:10:29,171 --> 00:10:32,674
Well, we've gotta meet everybody in
tomorrowland, so we'd better get movin',

243
00:10:32,758 --> 00:10:34,861
'cause it's all the way
on the other side of the park.

244
00:10:34,885 --> 00:10:36,386
I'm fine.

245
00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:38,889
You just try to keep up with us.

246
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:42,518
I can't take this.

247
00:10:44,812 --> 00:10:46,897
Dad, throw your hands up! It's fun!

248
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,941
Oh, yeah, it is fun!

249
00:10:49,066 --> 00:10:51,026
Hey! Yeah!

250
00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:52,110
Hey. Whoo!

251
00:10:52,194 --> 00:10:56,448
Whoa! Whoo! Whoo-hoo—hoo!

252
00:10:56,532 --> 00:11:01,161
Reuben, if you heard about that stock
at a birthday party, it's already too late.

253
00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:02,996
Gloria!

254
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:04,540
Gloria, sit down for a second.

255
00:11:04,665 --> 00:11:07,042
I'm fine, Jay. Please?

256
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:10,420
Look, you may not
be in pain. Okay.

257
00:11:10,504 --> 00:11:12,631
But I'm in pain
just thinking you're in pain.

258
00:11:12,756 --> 00:11:16,510
So humor me for one
minute. What are those?

259
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:20,097
There wasn't a big selection
at the bibbidi bobbidi boutique.

260
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,682
Are you crazy?

261
00:11:21,765 --> 00:11:25,727
I cannot walk around in public
with these... things.

262
00:11:25,811 --> 00:11:28,063
They're so yellow and so ugly.

263
00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:32,401
And— and they're so softy
and so comfortable.

264
00:11:32,484 --> 00:11:34,111
Jay, what is this?

265
00:11:35,112 --> 00:11:37,030
Thank you for
going shopping for me.

266
00:11:37,114 --> 00:11:39,366
Thank you for worrying
about my feet.

267
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:43,036
Thank you for giving me
yourjacket when I'm cold.

268
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,664
Such a good man, Jay. Thank you.

269
00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:46,874
Mmm.

270
00:11:48,250 --> 00:11:50,002
Wow.

271
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:52,880
I didn't expect you to be so...

272
00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:53,964
So nice.

273
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:57,050
Why are you so surprised?

274
00:11:57,134 --> 00:12:00,804
Now, please, don't go
all Latin on me when I say this.

275
00:12:00,888 --> 00:12:05,809
Is it possible you get angry,
from time to time,

276
00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:08,145
because you're always wearing...

277
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,147
Uncomfortable shoes?

278
00:12:14,318 --> 00:12:16,153
Maybe.

279
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:18,322
Can you get me a couple of more?

280
00:12:18,447 --> 00:12:21,491
Maybe they have purple?
Whatever you want, honey.

281
00:12:23,327 --> 00:12:27,080
All I'm saying is, it seemed like you were
pretty into Ethan until Dylan showed up.

282
00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:30,000
Don't get me wrong.
Ethan's nice, but he's no Dylan.

283
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:31,585
Maybe that's a good thing?

284
00:12:31,668 --> 00:12:33,587
Why? Because Dylan's
a free spirit?

285
00:12:33,670 --> 00:12:37,049
He's too edgy for you?
He plays by his own rules?

286
00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:39,301
Oh, my god. What?

287
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:43,972
I beg of you to turn around and experience
with me the greatest moment of my life.

288
00:12:44,056 --> 00:12:49,603
J' Daisy, Daisy
you're the one I adore, I'

289
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,855
your rebel boyfriend's
a dapper Dan.

290
00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:54,942
Maybe that's not him.
.I I want to be with you more .i

291
00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:58,320
oh! J“ it won't be a stylish— j'

292
00:12:58,445 --> 00:13:01,365
Dylan! Uh— uh, sorry. Sorry.

293
00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:03,700
Certainly seems like him.

294
00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:09,464
Oh, my god. He looked like those
old pictures of dad from high school.

295
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:10,958
Mm-hmm.

296
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,560
I'm really into street art
at the moment.

297
00:13:12,584 --> 00:13:14,437
There's a really great exhibit downtown.
I'll take you.

298
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:18,298
Oh, on what, your razor
scooter? Mom wants you. Uh— uh...

299
00:13:18,382 --> 00:13:21,218
Ethan, I've been looking all over for you!

300
00:13:24,388 --> 00:13:27,307
I remember I was on
pirates of the Caribbean,

301
00:13:27,391 --> 00:13:30,143
and this whole fight with dede
was really eating at me.

302
00:13:30,227 --> 00:13:33,689
And there was this angry
animatronic wench with a rolling pin...

303
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,357
Chasing some poor pirate around.

304
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:38,026
They were on a track,
running in circles,

305
00:13:38,110 --> 00:13:40,320
so he could never
get away from her.

306
00:13:40,404 --> 00:13:42,114
And I remember thinking,

307
00:13:42,197 --> 00:13:44,700
“I can't save you, buddy,

308
00:13:44,783 --> 00:13:46,785
but I'm getting off this ride.”

309
00:13:46,868 --> 00:13:49,287
A—and we—
A-and we were going around a corner,

310
00:13:49,371 --> 00:13:51,832
and I was screaming,
and I swallowed a bug!

311
00:13:51,915 --> 00:13:54,209
Oh, being tail is everything
that I dreamed it would be.

312
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,461
What should we do next?
Sit down.

313
00:13:56,586 --> 00:13:59,798
Where we gonna sit down? The
ground. Here. This is good. Right here.

314
00:13:59,923 --> 00:14:01,425
Oh! Are you okay, dad?

315
00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,844
No, I'm not okay.

316
00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:06,638
I hate to say this,
but these rides are killing me.

317
00:14:06,763 --> 00:14:09,933
I know! But you're the
king of roller coasters.

318
00:14:10,017 --> 00:14:12,394
Something happens
when you get older.

319
00:14:12,477 --> 00:14:15,188
Guess you can't take it.

320
00:14:15,272 --> 00:14:19,359
One of my favorite things in the world
is doing stupid fun stuff with you,

321
00:14:19,443 --> 00:14:22,738
like pogo—stick basketball or trying
to get a swing to go all the way around.

322
00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:25,323
Next time, we should sit
on a fire extinguisher.

323
00:14:25,449 --> 00:14:28,160
Yes, or a bottle of coke
and some mentos. Ah.

324
00:14:28,243 --> 00:14:30,537
Honestly, though,
the way I'm feeling right now,

325
00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,581
I don't know if there's
gonna be a next time.

326
00:14:32,664 --> 00:14:36,626
Dad, we can always
find cool stuff to do.

327
00:14:36,710 --> 00:14:39,046
Even if you're old
and in a wheelchair,

328
00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:41,798
I'll take you to the mall and push you
as fast as you wanna go.

329
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:44,301
Really? You'd do that?

330
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,845
Heck, yeah.
And we'll pop some wheelies too.

331
00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:50,557
That sounds fun. And I'll take you to
the top of a huge hill and just let go.

332
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:54,644
Okay, we'll nail down the specifics later,
but that— that's really nice.

333
00:14:56,188 --> 00:14:57,939
So, do you still wanna talk or...

334
00:14:58,065 --> 00:15:00,484
No, go. Ride space mountain.

335
00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:02,694
Hey. Hey, uh, at the end,
when they take a picture,

336
00:15:02,778 --> 00:15:04,404
do something hilarious
for both of us.

337
00:15:04,488 --> 00:15:06,114
You're gonna die.

338
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:09,034
Yup. When you see
it, not 'cause you're old.

339
00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:10,911
Whoo!

340
00:15:10,994 --> 00:15:13,246
Lily! Lily, stop!

341
00:15:13,330 --> 00:15:14,498
Dad! Dad, grab her!

342
00:15:14,623 --> 00:15:17,292
Heyllgotya,
youlflflernonkey! Thank you.

343
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,003
Hey, cam, I got her.
We're in fantasyland. Where are you?

344
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:23,173
Okay, it's toontown,
not “toonton.”

345
00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:25,050
You've been watching
too much pbs.

346
00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:27,844
Thank you.
All right, honey. Come here.

347
00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:30,597
Idontfikethsthmg. Yeah?

348
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:35,560
Well, I don't like running like a crazy
person through downton— downtown Disney.

349
00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:38,230
I don't know what to
do. The leash is not the answer.

350
00:15:38,313 --> 00:15:40,065
- — You want my help?
- Yes, please!

351
00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:42,126
'Cause I can fix this for you
in about two minutes.

352
00:15:42,150 --> 00:15:44,861
Come on, baby girl.
Come with me. We'll be right back.

353
00:15:44,986 --> 00:15:47,531
Okay. Where
we going? Oh, this way?

354
00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:51,952
Ugh!

355
00:15:52,035 --> 00:15:55,664
Manny, you don't sound very happy
for a kid that is flying an elephant.

356
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:58,083
I lost to durkas. It's not fair.

357
00:15:58,166 --> 00:16:00,794
He wanted to buy IBM
because he thought it was funny to say.

358
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:04,339
Well, I'm glad that you lost.
Fake money has changed you.

359
00:16:04,422 --> 00:16:07,968
Where is the Manny that used to stop
to smell the roses?

360
00:16:08,051 --> 00:16:10,137
He took a bath on
a solar start-up in San Jose.

361
00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:13,598
You have been so busy burying
your face in your phone...

362
00:16:13,682 --> 00:16:15,976
That you barely said hello
to your family,

363
00:16:16,059 --> 00:16:18,645
you gave winnie—the-pooh
the cold shoulder...

364
00:16:18,728 --> 00:16:22,065
And you haven't even noticed
that pretty girl in the blue elephant...

365
00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,942
That has been smiling at you.

366
00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:27,946
Not my type.
But still, nice to be noticed.

367
00:16:28,029 --> 00:16:31,324
You see what happens when you're not
burying your head in business?

368
00:16:31,408 --> 00:16:33,535
You're right.
I'll try to be more present.

369
00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:39,332
What the heck's on your
feet? They're slippers.

370
00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:41,877
They're like pillows.

371
00:16:43,712 --> 00:16:44,796
Attagirl.

372
00:16:46,006 --> 00:16:47,632
You're welcome.

373
00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:49,235
Look. Your dad
got her baby high heels,

374
00:16:49,259 --> 00:16:51,070
which we said we were never
gonna let her wear.

375
00:16:51,094 --> 00:16:53,263
- I love 'em.
- You look gorgeous, sweetie.

376
00:16:53,346 --> 00:16:55,032
Oh, my god.
You thought people judged us before?

377
00:16:55,056 --> 00:16:57,368
Wait till they meet little miss
anaheim. Who cares? Look at her.

378
00:16:57,392 --> 00:16:59,019
She can barely move.

379
00:16:59,102 --> 00:17:01,354
Thank you, dad.

380
00:17:01,438 --> 00:17:04,274
You know what? She's got
pretty good gams for a 3-year-old.

381
00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:08,403
Cheese!

382
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:11,364
Gotm thanks,
lflflejohn. Thank you.

383
00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:14,367
Aw. Oh! They have corn dogs.

384
00:17:14,451 --> 00:17:16,512
We gotta get one before we go back.
They are legendary.

385
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:18,538
I'll be right back. Okay.

386
00:17:18,622 --> 00:17:22,042
Haley! It's me, Dylan.

387
00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:24,794
I'm in the bear suit.
I borrowed it to talk to you.

388
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:26,755
Why are you dancing like that?

389
00:17:26,838 --> 00:17:28,757
This is what little John does.

390
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,884
Maybe. I don't know what movie
this dude is from.

391
00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:32,677
I'm not even supposed
to be talking to you.

392
00:17:32,761 --> 00:17:34,512
Well, I'm not talking to you.

393
00:17:34,596 --> 00:17:36,723
No, you can talk.

394
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:38,725
I know. But I'm mad.

395
00:17:38,808 --> 00:17:40,727
You came back to town
and didn't even call me.

396
00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:42,562
I was embarrassed.

397
00:17:42,646 --> 00:17:46,816
I lost my job at the dude ranch,
and I wanted to get my act together first.

398
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:48,777
What, the
four-dweebs-on-a-bike act?

399
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:53,198
Okay, the dapper dans are
a main street tradition since 1959.

400
00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:54,783
Hey. What's going on?

401
00:17:55,784 --> 00:17:56,868
Nothing.

402
00:17:56,952 --> 00:17:59,246
I still love her, Ethan.

403
00:17:59,371 --> 00:18:01,665
Okay, how do you know
my name? It's Dylan.

404
00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:04,167
Look, I don't wanna
harsh your day,

405
00:18:04,251 --> 00:18:07,963
but I've never stopped loving Haley,
and I never will!

406
00:18:08,046 --> 00:18:09,673
I—is this some sort of joke?

407
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:12,717
- Do I look like I'm joking?
- Dylan, let's not do this now.

408
00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:15,929
It has to be now.
I've got a parade at 3:00.

409
00:18:16,012 --> 00:18:17,472
Hey, seriously, dude, back off.

410
00:18:17,555 --> 00:18:20,267
Okay. That was my face.

411
00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:22,686
And you're the one
who needs to back off.

412
00:18:24,437 --> 00:18:26,815
Oh! Oh. Ho! You...

413
00:18:26,898 --> 00:18:30,443
Okay. This thing's kinda heavy.
I can't get up.

414
00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:33,863
Ethan? Ethan, what is going on?
What are you doing?

415
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:35,824
Uh, hi, Mrs. Dunphy. Help me up.

416
00:18:35,907 --> 00:18:38,034
Oh. No.

417
00:18:39,869 --> 00:18:42,539
If I could get up, I would...

418
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:47,669
Come on, Lily, sweetie.
Keep up, honey. Come on.

419
00:18:47,752 --> 00:18:50,463
Phil, you don't look like
you're doing very well.

420
00:18:50,547 --> 00:18:53,842
Maybe because I officially became an
old man back there at thunder mountain.

421
00:18:53,925 --> 00:18:58,054
Oh. Oh, my goodness. You are burning up.
You might have the flu.

422
00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:04,602
A bunch of guys at work had the flu, and we
all drink orange juice out of the same carton.

423
00:19:04,728 --> 00:19:07,063
We should get cups. Hmm.

424
00:19:07,147 --> 00:19:09,691
Luke, did you hear that?
I have the flu!

425
00:19:09,774 --> 00:19:11,359
Glad we didn't
share that pickle.

426
00:19:11,443 --> 00:19:13,862
Hey, everybody.

427
00:19:13,945 --> 00:19:15,530
Oh, hey— hey, guys.
Where's Ethan?

428
00:19:15,613 --> 00:19:17,407
Oh, he's staying.
He ran into some friends.

429
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:20,160
But Dylan got fired, so—
Don't freak out.

430
00:19:20,243 --> 00:19:22,495
We have to give him a ride home.

431
00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:24,581
And we're back together. Yay.

432
00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:29,002
Hey, no one goes home
till we hit the Lincoln thing.

433
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:31,671
Yawn. Don't
even try to fight it.

434
00:19:31,755 --> 00:19:33,235
Yeah, he made us go
when we were kids.

435
00:19:33,298 --> 00:19:37,385
Come on, people. It's a robotic
president. What's not to love?

436
00:19:37,469 --> 00:19:38,970
The robotic president?

437
00:19:39,054 --> 00:19:41,848
So my plan was,
drive Claire and Mitchell home,

438
00:19:41,931 --> 00:19:46,394
put them to bed,
pour myself a big tumbler of scotch...

439
00:19:46,478 --> 00:19:48,188
And tell dede it was over.

440
00:19:48,271 --> 00:19:50,523
But on the way out,
we made one last stop.

441
00:19:50,607 --> 00:19:54,486
If destruction be our lot,

442
00:19:54,569 --> 00:19:59,366
we ourselves must be
its author and finisher.

443
00:19:59,449 --> 00:20:02,911
As a nation of free men,

444
00:20:02,994 --> 00:20:05,413
we must live through all times...

445
00:20:05,497 --> 00:20:09,209
I don't know what happened. Maybe it's what
robot Lincoln said about a man's duty...

446
00:20:09,292 --> 00:20:12,087
Or keeping the union together.

447
00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:14,881
Maybe I just chickened out.

448
00:20:14,964 --> 00:20:17,342
Bull realized
that staying with my kids...

449
00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:20,261
Was more important
than leaving my wife.

450
00:20:20,345 --> 00:20:22,889
Now that's not
the right decision for everyone,

451
00:20:22,972 --> 00:20:25,058
but it was
the right decision for me.

452
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:27,769
And in that faith,

453
00:20:27,852 --> 00:20:29,938
let us, to the end,

454
00:20:30,021 --> 00:20:32,524
dare to do our duty...

455
00:20:32,607 --> 00:20:34,109
As we understand it.

456
00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:36,653
So I stuck it out
until they were grown.

457
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:40,115
Jay, you want
to join me in the jacuzzi?

458
00:20:40,198 --> 00:20:43,493
And the universe rewarded me.

459
00:20:46,538 --> 00:20:48,164
Oh, yeah. Here we go.

460
00:20:48,248 --> 00:20:49,749
Hey, dad,
roller coaster fist bump.

461
00:20:51,167 --> 00:20:52,377
Whoa! Whoo!

462
00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:56,214
Whoo! Whoo!

463
00:20:56,339 --> 00:20:59,217
Oh.oh!

464
00:20:59,342 --> 00:21:00,802
Oh. What was that?

465
00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:03,847
Whoo!

466
00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:08,560
Hey! This is gonna
be so awesome! Whoo!

467
00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:14,566
Close your eyes.
It makes it more fun.

468
00:21:14,649 --> 00:21:16,276
Oh, yeah. That is more fun.

469
00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:19,487
Ooh. Oh!

470
00:21:29,581 --> 00:21:30,582
English - us - psdh