1
00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:04,014
Woman: Thank you for flying
jetblue. Welcome to las Vegas.

2
00:00:04,038 --> 00:00:05,673
Here you go, here you go.

3
00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:07,308
That was quick.

4
00:00:07,341 --> 00:00:09,810
You skip the line when
you're on the excelsior level.
Oh.
Oh.

5
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:12,146
Three rooms adjoining,
top floor.

6
00:00:12,180 --> 00:00:14,315
Oh.
Silver, pretty.

7
00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,650
Platinum, so don't wave
that around everywhere.

8
00:00:16,684 --> 00:00:19,420
People'll get jealous.
Maybe wave it around a little.

9
00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:20,588
[ Laughter ]

10
00:00:20,621 --> 00:00:22,823
My friend Burt Tanner
runs the hotel.

11
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:24,258
He comped us a few rooms

12
00:00:24,292 --> 00:00:27,261
because we sold him some closets
for his high-roller suites.

13
00:00:27,295 --> 00:00:29,930
Zebrawood, heated sock drawer,
the works.

14
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:33,434
Hey, luxury bathroom,
it's me, lowly closet.

15
00:00:33,467 --> 00:00:35,002
Watch your back.

16
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:36,104
Mitchell?

17
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:37,271
Langham?

18
00:00:37,305 --> 00:00:39,673
A... d... hey, cam,
i-it's langham and Tim!

19
00:00:39,707 --> 00:00:40,941
Hi!
Hi!
Hi!

20
00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:42,943
What are you boys doing here?

21
00:00:42,976 --> 00:00:46,180
Bachelor-party weekend.
We're getting married in June.
What?

22
00:00:46,214 --> 00:00:49,683
Oh, we really wanted
to invite you, but Tim's
family is huge...

23
00:00:49,717 --> 00:00:52,420
Relax. We're getting
married in may and
you're not coming, so...

24
00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:53,287
[ Laughs ]
Mitchell.

25
00:00:53,321 --> 00:00:54,622
Oh, look at us moving on.

26
00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:56,924
It's almost like you never
dumped me in an e-mail

27
00:00:56,957 --> 00:00:59,093
the morning after i told you
that i loved you.

28
00:00:59,127 --> 00:01:01,105
Well, y... in my defense,
e-mail... it was
new back then...

29
00:01:01,129 --> 00:01:02,472
Oh.
And it was
still a blurry line

30
00:01:02,496 --> 00:01:03,640
as to what was
appropriate and...

31
00:01:03,664 --> 00:01:06,100
Well, we have
a pretty packed weekend.

32
00:01:06,134 --> 00:01:07,535
Oh, we do.

33
00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:10,104
But if you guys have some time,
here's our itinerary.

34
00:01:10,138 --> 00:01:11,439
Okay.
Come play.

35
00:01:11,472 --> 00:01:12,606
Oh, yeah.
Fun. Bye.

36
00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,775
You guys,
congratulations.
Thank you.

37
00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:17,378
Oh, my gosh,
an actual gay agenda.

38
00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:18,779
[ Chuckles ]
Oooh.

39
00:01:18,812 --> 00:01:21,949
Looks like we're not gonna see
much of you two this trip.

40
00:01:21,982 --> 00:01:23,050
No.
No, no.

41
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,461
We are not participating
in any of this.

42
00:01:24,485 --> 00:01:26,420
They're very judgy about
bachelor parties.

43
00:01:26,454 --> 00:01:29,089
I offered to throw them one,
and i got a whole lecture.
Mm.

44
00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:30,258
We're 40.
We have a child.

45
00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:31,592
We've been together
for 10 years.

46
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:32,493
That's the one.

47
00:01:32,526 --> 00:01:34,094
It's just not
who we are anymore.

48
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:37,765
Listen to this... "bananas and
cabanas pool party." Oh, cam.

49
00:01:37,798 --> 00:01:41,101
Yeah. "Most creative
speedo wins tickets to
the kilty pleasures."

50
00:01:41,135 --> 00:01:42,436
Oh.
Ah!
Please.

51
00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:45,005
What is
the kilty pleasures?
This.

52
00:01:45,038 --> 00:01:49,310
We will be maintaining our
dignity in the spa, thank you.

53
00:01:50,711 --> 00:01:53,113
I mean, come on,
have you ever seen

54
00:01:53,147 --> 00:01:54,815
a Scottish person this tan?

55
00:01:54,848 --> 00:01:56,784
I'm embarrassed
even looking at it.

56
00:01:56,817 --> 00:01:58,586
Then stop.

57
00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:06,619
Captions by vitac...

58
00:02:07,628 --> 00:02:11,098
***

59
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,601
whoa, that warmer drawer
really works.

60
00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,803
It's like my mom's
hugging my feet again.

61
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:16,946
I'm gonna go do some shopping.

62
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:18,772
Oh, well, maybe
we'll catch up later.

63
00:02:18,806 --> 00:02:20,774
No, you have your day,
I'll have mine.

64
00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:22,943
Well, how 'bout the bar
at like 5:00?

65
00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:23,944
Sure.

66
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,947
She was icing me,
but i deserved it.

67
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,817
For the first time in my whole
life, i was neglecting her.

68
00:02:29,850 --> 00:02:31,285
I'd been invited to audition

69
00:02:31,319 --> 00:02:33,287
for a secret magic society
in las Vegas,

70
00:02:33,321 --> 00:02:35,789
but in all my rehearsals,
I'd paid no attention to Claire.

71
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:37,658
I even left her alone
in a movie theater once.

72
00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:39,660
[ Cellphone rings ]

73
00:02:39,693 --> 00:02:40,794
Oh, no.

74
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,796
I let Phil think
i was still mad at him

75
00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:45,366
because i needed
a little time to myself.

76
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,969
Yeah!
Come to mama!
Yeah!

77
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,804
Years ago,
Phil and i put aside money

78
00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:53,307
for a trip
on our 25th anniversary,

79
00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:56,009
but i lost that money
on a girls' weekend in Vegas.

80
00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:58,312
Since then,
I've been on a secret mission

81
00:02:58,346 --> 00:02:59,647
to win that money back,

82
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:03,651
and if things go well
this weekend, i am even.

83
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:06,320
Vegas, you have
a gambling problem,

84
00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:07,955
and her name is Claire.

85
00:03:09,357 --> 00:03:10,424
[ Knock on door ]

86
00:03:10,458 --> 00:03:12,760
Man: [ British accent ]
Knockity-knock-knock.

87
00:03:12,793 --> 00:03:13,927
Mr. Dunphy, i presume?

88
00:03:13,961 --> 00:03:15,263
Yes. Who... hi.

89
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:16,773
I'm Leslie Higgins... it's
a boy's name where I'm from.

90
00:03:16,797 --> 00:03:18,932
I'm your Butler.
Oh. Butler. Cool.

91
00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:21,935
Yes. As an excelsior guest, uh,
I'm at your Beck and call 24/7.

92
00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:24,372
Anything you need,
big or small, i can...
oh...

93
00:03:27,308 --> 00:03:28,442
Can i just segue, sir,

94
00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:30,116
to the importance
of discretion in my job?

95
00:03:30,143 --> 00:03:32,680
I'll just pop those...
oh, no, no, no.
Never mind those.

96
00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,458
As you wish.
They're for an appointment
i have later.

97
00:03:34,482 --> 00:03:35,859
The less you know
about that, the better.

98
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:37,451
A myriad of apologies,
sir.
[ Chuckles ]

99
00:03:37,485 --> 00:03:39,453
If there's
nothing else...
Oh, hang on.

100
00:03:39,487 --> 00:03:41,465
Actually, do you know where
i can get a cape laundered?

101
00:03:41,489 --> 00:03:43,123
Opera or superhero?
I'd rather not say.

102
00:03:43,156 --> 00:03:44,758
I overstepped the mark
by asking.

103
00:03:44,792 --> 00:03:46,594
Uh, could i just, uh,
quickly point out

104
00:03:46,627 --> 00:03:48,095
our luxury bath service, sir?

105
00:03:48,128 --> 00:03:50,264
We have five
outrageously decadent baths

106
00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:52,433
that i can prepare for you
at a moment's notice.

107
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:53,777
Uh, i should
just point out, though,

108
00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:55,612
that our pharaoh's fantasy
does take a dash longer,

109
00:03:55,636 --> 00:03:57,771
normally, because our nubian
lives off-site.

110
00:03:57,805 --> 00:03:59,106
Um... If there's
nothing else,

111
00:03:59,139 --> 00:04:01,141
I'll just help you
with your case.
Uh, no, uh...

112
00:04:03,977 --> 00:04:05,446
I'll get that.
Yeah.

113
00:04:05,479 --> 00:04:07,448
Yep. All right.
Thank you.

114
00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:09,617
I love cucumber water.
I know.

115
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:11,585
If i were president...
I know, i know.

116
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:13,621
Cucumbers in the reservoirs.

117
00:04:13,654 --> 00:04:15,623
Giant cucumbers.
Mm.

118
00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:16,757
Mr. pritchett?
Yes, hi.

119
00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:18,592
All right, I'll see you
in 90 minutes.

120
00:04:18,626 --> 00:04:19,793
Enjoy.
Thank you.

121
00:04:22,963 --> 00:04:24,465
Woman:
Mr. Tucker?

122
00:04:27,801 --> 00:04:29,303
Mr. Tucker?

123
00:04:33,307 --> 00:04:34,608
[ Dance music plays ]

124
00:04:34,642 --> 00:04:37,277
We had a few no-shows for
the Britney concert, so...

125
00:04:37,311 --> 00:04:39,179
One, please.

126
00:04:39,212 --> 00:04:40,448
Uh, what about Mitchell?

127
00:04:40,481 --> 00:04:42,783
It's Vegas... he doesn't
need to know what I'm doing.

128
00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:44,418
I don't need to know
what he's doing.

129
00:04:44,452 --> 00:04:46,754
So if you see him, maybe
don't mention what I'm doing.

130
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,822
Oh. Understood.

131
00:04:48,856 --> 00:04:51,359
So, do you have anything
on the aisle?

132
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,128
[ Buzzer ]
Man: Yeah?

133
00:04:55,162 --> 00:04:56,964
Rasputin's dalmatian drowned
in the volga.

134
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,274
I thought he was allergic
to dogs.

135
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,434
You're thinking of Merlin.
And it was peanuts.

136
00:05:00,468 --> 00:05:01,969
[ Door unlocks ]

137
00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:03,270
[ Sighs ]

138
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:06,974
Okay, everybody.
We have a visitor.

139
00:05:07,007 --> 00:05:08,108
Welcome Phil Dunphy.

140
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:09,276
Hi.
Man: Hey, Phil.
Woman: Hi.

141
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,945
[ Chuckling ] Hey.
I'm so honored to be here.

142
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:12,946
Wow.

143
00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:15,315
You may recognize
my... my screen name,

144
00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:16,617
abracadunphy17.

145
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:17,951
That's you?

146
00:05:17,985 --> 00:05:19,629
You're up in the middle
of the night a lot.

147
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:21,121
My wife grinds her teeth.

148
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:23,624
But let me tell you
another story.

149
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:26,293
It's about the miracle
of metamorphosis.

150
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,295
Uh, Phil...
they say the only constant
is change...

151
00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:30,631
Phil, we're gonna get to
your trick in just a minute.

152
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,833
Oh. I'm sorry.
[ Laughs nervously ]

153
00:05:32,866 --> 00:05:34,635
Got a little excited there.

154
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,304
The heroes of the
underground-magic blogosphere...

155
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:41,475
"flashpaper" finelli,
kaiser mayhem, the kid.

156
00:05:41,509 --> 00:05:42,810
When you think about it,

157
00:05:42,843 --> 00:05:45,713
it's crazy they're all alive
at the same time.

158
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:48,649
Jay, I'm feeling a little cold.

159
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:49,983
Maybe i should buy a scarf.

160
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,419
Sure, get a couple of 'em.

161
00:05:51,452 --> 00:05:52,986
[ Gasps ]

162
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:55,756
[ Chuckling ] Why, i know
it's a little extravagant,

163
00:05:55,789 --> 00:05:58,492
but we're excelsior now...
Might as well look it.

164
00:05:58,526 --> 00:06:00,761
Many years ago,
when Jay was in las Vegas,

165
00:06:00,794 --> 00:06:04,598
he bought barkley,
the doggy Butler.

166
00:06:04,632 --> 00:06:06,266
I hate barkley.

167
00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:09,937
I knew if Jay saw rebarka,
he would want her too.

168
00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:12,773
Yeah, that's her name...
Rebarka.

169
00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:14,442
Uh, but, uh...
You know,

170
00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:17,445
if we're going to gamble,
maybe i need my lucky sweater.

171
00:06:17,478 --> 00:06:19,447
Can you go and get it
in the room?

172
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:20,781
Who has a lucky sweater?

173
00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:23,250
You wore two different shoes
to watch the super bowl.

174
00:06:23,283 --> 00:06:24,418
Fine.

175
00:06:24,452 --> 00:06:26,319
No, Jay!
Other way.

176
00:06:27,655 --> 00:06:29,923
I like that way.

177
00:06:29,957 --> 00:06:32,092
[ Elevator bell dings ]

178
00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:33,761
Sorry, sir.
This is a private elevator.

179
00:06:33,794 --> 00:06:34,928
No need to apologize.

180
00:06:34,962 --> 00:06:37,765
I'm glad you're on top
of this stuff.

181
00:06:37,798 --> 00:06:39,433
That's only for
the excelsior level.

182
00:06:39,467 --> 00:06:40,934
This elevator goes
to the top floor.

183
00:06:40,968 --> 00:06:44,104
I thought excelsior
was the top... 62.

184
00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:46,039
Mandalay bay has 63 floors.

185
00:06:46,073 --> 00:06:48,576
Top floor is excelsior plus.

186
00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:51,111
Wait, they're allowed up there?

187
00:06:51,144 --> 00:06:52,613
They're wearing dungarees.

188
00:06:52,646 --> 00:06:56,650
61, 62... 63!
Son of a bitch!

189
00:07:01,689 --> 00:07:02,990
Come on, let me see an eight.

190
00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:04,758
I want to see an eight.
Croupier:
Seven out.

191
00:07:04,792 --> 00:07:05,759
Sorry.

192
00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:07,461
We'll get 'em next time, baby.

193
00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:08,662
Claire.
Give me your key.

194
00:07:08,696 --> 00:07:10,430
I need to charge something
to your room.

195
00:07:10,464 --> 00:07:11,465
Hang on a second.

196
00:07:11,499 --> 00:07:13,501
Four.
Point is four.

197
00:07:13,534 --> 00:07:18,271
Okay, odds on four
and a five each on "c" and "e."

198
00:07:18,305 --> 00:07:19,607
What are you talking about?

199
00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,609
It's the lady version
of barkley.

200
00:07:21,642 --> 00:07:23,110
I have to put it on hold

201
00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:25,679
so that Jay, if he sees it,
he can't buy it,

202
00:07:25,713 --> 00:07:28,582
and then i will cancel
the charge before we leave.

203
00:07:28,616 --> 00:07:29,750
Winner...
Four the hard way!

204
00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,620
Oh, yes!
Finally!

205
00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:33,587
[ Laughs ]

206
00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:35,255
Can i have the key?

207
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,257
No, no, no.
You're not going anywhere.

208
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:38,792
You're my
good-luck charm.

209
00:07:38,826 --> 00:07:40,694
Give these a blow, beautiful.

210
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,169
Oh! And how was
your massage?

211
00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:50,170
[ Loudly ] So re...

212
00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:51,772
[ normal voice ]
So, so relaxing.

213
00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,607
Sorry, my masseuse
was blasting the Enya.

214
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:55,142
So, what are you gonna do next?

215
00:07:55,175 --> 00:07:56,810
A long soak?
A long sauna?

216
00:07:56,844 --> 00:07:58,345
Ooh, i think a sauna.

217
00:07:58,378 --> 00:07:59,780
Yeah, i think I'm gonna
do a soak.

218
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:02,650
Ooh, a soak
does sound nice.
Maybe I'll do a sauna.

219
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:03,993
Is that... is that
glitter on your face?

220
00:08:04,017 --> 00:08:05,285
Oh...

221
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,958
Yeah, i think my masseuse
might moonlight.

222
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:08,455
Vegas.
[ Laughs ]

223
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,323
All right, I'll see you
in an hour.
Okay. Yeah.

224
00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:12,826
Enjoy it. Really have fun.
Relax, Mitchell.

225
00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:16,496
Phil, you're up.
Phil: Okay.

226
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:20,300
The miracle...
Of metamorphosis.

227
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:23,470
They say the only constant
is change.

228
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:27,675
Well, all of that is about
to ch... be different.

229
00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:32,312
Note the simple burlap sack,
the kind you'd find in any home.

230
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,481
If you'd be so kind
as to assist me,

231
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,816
the... the... the kid,

232
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:39,252
I'll endeavor to prove
that some change is glacial,

233
00:08:39,286 --> 00:08:42,422
while some change
is instantaneous.

234
00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:45,593
Now, if you'd be so kind as
to raise the simple burlap sack

235
00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:48,629
above my head
and pinch my wrists.

236
00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:52,332
You'll note, the clock
says exactly 4:02.

237
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:53,767
I have 3:15.

238
00:08:53,801 --> 00:08:55,836
Yeah, i have 6:35.

239
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,104
Kaiser mayhem!

240
00:08:57,137 --> 00:08:58,438
It's what i do.

241
00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,383
Wait, it's 5:20? I actually
have to call my wife.

242
00:09:00,407 --> 00:09:02,776
Uh, no, Phil, you can't just
stop in the middle of a trick.

243
00:09:02,810 --> 00:09:03,777
That's a cardinal rule.

244
00:09:03,811 --> 00:09:04,945
Guys, it's an emergency.

245
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,978
Don't tell me you've never
had to call your spouse.

246
00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:11,752
Oh... There's...
There's people for you.

247
00:09:11,785 --> 00:09:13,587
Come on, Claire.
Please pick up.

248
00:09:13,621 --> 00:09:16,757
Croupier:
And the lady wins again.
Yes! Yes!

249
00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:18,091
I did it! I did it!

250
00:09:18,125 --> 00:09:19,627
I did it!
I won back my money.

251
00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:22,129
Oh, suck it, the house.
[ Laughs ]

252
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:24,932
Claire, the key.
Yeah, okay, here you go.

253
00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:27,901
And, hey,
buy yourself something sparkly.

254
00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:33,440
Gloria, there's a floor
above us.

255
00:09:33,473 --> 00:09:35,208
What?!
I know.
It threw me, too.

256
00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:36,543
Excelsior plus.

257
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:39,112
But to the people on that floor,
we're excelsior minus.

258
00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:40,113
Mm, what is up there?

259
00:09:40,147 --> 00:09:41,481
You need a black card to get in.

260
00:09:41,514 --> 00:09:43,583
All we've got
is this stupid silver one.

261
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:45,118
Oh, i thought it was platinum.

262
00:09:45,152 --> 00:09:46,419
It's crap.

263
00:09:46,453 --> 00:09:49,923
Uh, why... why don't you
call your friend Burt

264
00:09:49,957 --> 00:09:52,492
and tell him that
we need the black card?

265
00:09:52,525 --> 00:09:54,671
Because he's not my friend.
I never really even met him.

266
00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:57,264
I think i heard him cough
one time on a conference call.

267
00:09:57,297 --> 00:09:59,099
I don't know why he would
treat me this way.

268
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:01,001
Oh, come on!
What?

269
00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:04,972
Oh, come on!
You're Jay pritchett!

270
00:10:05,005 --> 00:10:06,774
You're gonna find
your friend Burt

271
00:10:06,807 --> 00:10:07,808
and tell him who you are,

272
00:10:07,841 --> 00:10:09,442
and you're gonna get
the black card,

273
00:10:09,476 --> 00:10:11,511
because when you set
your mind on something,

274
00:10:11,544 --> 00:10:12,479
nobody can stop you!

275
00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:14,247
Right!
Wait!

276
00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:15,683
Go that way.

277
00:10:18,285 --> 00:10:22,622
Excuse me, how much
is that doggy in the window?

278
00:10:24,491 --> 00:10:29,329
I had finally taken back from
Vegas what Vegas took from me.

279
00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:32,632
That's a feeling of satisfaction
i can't describe...

280
00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:33,967
Because it didn't last
very long.

281
00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:35,435
Mitchell:
Oh, hey, Claire.
Yeah?

282
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:37,304
Have you seen cam?
No.

283
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:40,440
Although... We should stay
in one place so he can find us.
Yeah.

284
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:42,009
How about a Blackjack table?

285
00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:44,945
Oh, no, I'm really worn out
from my massage, the sauna...

286
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,980
It was just... it was
a lot of detoxing.

287
00:10:47,014 --> 00:10:49,282
You know what you need?
Some toxing.

288
00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:51,952
No.
Hand of Blackjack,
couple of tequilas.

289
00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:54,154
Come on, it'll be fun.
Do it.

290
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:55,956
You sound just like
the kid who bullied me

291
00:10:55,989 --> 00:10:57,457
into smoking my first cigarette.

292
00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:59,159
Maybe this time
you won't tell on me.

293
00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:00,293
And then hit.
Yes.

294
00:11:00,327 --> 00:11:02,629
And then hit.
And then stay. Ah, ah.

295
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,631
I know. I have it.
Okay.

296
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,333
18, 19, 18.

297
00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,135
You are in a great position
right now.

298
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,470
Oh, the dealer has 21.

299
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,305
Hers is better.
I am so sorry, Mitchell.

300
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:14,141
I promise you,
we did everything right.

301
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,475
Don't be mad.
I'm not mad.

302
00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:17,477
Really?
T-that was...
that was thrilling.

303
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:18,645
I'm...

304
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:19,923
My pulse is racing.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

305
00:11:19,947 --> 00:11:21,490
Thank you so much
for making me do this.
Yeah.

306
00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:22,816
I'm going to play another hand.

307
00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:25,418
We're going to play
another hand.
No, alone.

308
00:11:25,452 --> 00:11:26,763
Not with you.
You're bad luck.
Really?

309
00:11:26,787 --> 00:11:27,921
Go... far.

310
00:11:27,955 --> 00:11:30,590
The minute i got rid of her,
i couldn't lose.

311
00:11:30,623 --> 00:11:32,592
Oh, gambling's fun.

312
00:11:32,625 --> 00:11:33,927
And easy.

313
00:11:33,961 --> 00:11:36,663
Hey, big spender.
What are you doing?
Hey.

314
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,265
Gambling.
I'm a gambler now.

315
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:40,167
Look at you,
letting loose.
Yeah.

316
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,434
Yeah, i guess i figure

317
00:11:41,468 --> 00:11:43,603
whatever mischief one
might get into in Vegas

318
00:11:43,636 --> 00:11:46,606
kind of remains here within the
limits of the city, you know?

319
00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:48,441
That's a cool way
to think about it.
Yeah.

320
00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:50,954
You know, I'm really glad
that you came over here.
Really?
Why is that?

321
00:11:50,978 --> 00:11:53,914
Well, i always hated the
way that things ended
between us, you know?

322
00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:56,449
Maybe now we can go out
on a better note.

323
00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:58,418
That's nice.
Yeah.

324
00:11:58,451 --> 00:11:59,920
[ Laughing ]
Oh... oh, my god!

325
00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:02,289
6-2-3-3, that's...
That's my room number.

326
00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:03,924
Huh.
Um, hit me.

327
00:12:03,957 --> 00:12:05,258
Dealer:
Seven.

328
00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:06,259
Seven!

329
00:12:06,293 --> 00:12:07,427
That's 21, huh?

330
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:10,263
Yes! Yeah! Ah!
[ Laughs ]

331
00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:12,265
[ Sighs ]
Whoa,
check you out.

332
00:12:12,299 --> 00:12:14,267
I guess tonight's my night
to get lucky.

333
00:12:14,301 --> 00:12:15,268
I would say.

334
00:12:15,302 --> 00:12:17,104
80, okay.
Thank you.

335
00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:18,972
Maybe i will run
into you again, huh?
Okay.

336
00:12:19,907 --> 00:12:22,709
Oh, you...

337
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:30,583
$120, $140, Higgins,
for nothing... nothing!

338
00:12:30,617 --> 00:12:33,253
I want to do something crazy.
Okay, I'm gonna order a bath.

339
00:12:33,286 --> 00:12:35,789
Sir, it seems to me
like you've gone mad.

340
00:12:35,823 --> 00:12:36,824
[ Both laugh ]

341
00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:38,125
Okay, this is what i want.

342
00:12:38,158 --> 00:12:40,593
I want something romantic,
but also a little dangerous.

343
00:12:40,627 --> 00:12:43,763
Romantic, dangerous... might
i suggest, sir, the techno bath?

344
00:12:43,797 --> 00:12:45,933
Your heart will throb
with the bass

345
00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:48,768
while your eyes take in an
off-the-scale laser light show

346
00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:50,938
from that most intimate
of v.I.P. Arenas...

347
00:12:50,971 --> 00:12:52,272
Your own tub.

348
00:12:52,305 --> 00:12:55,442
Okay. I want that.
That's what i want.
[ Laughs ]

349
00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:58,278
Methinks the little red riding
hood may be a big, bad wolf.

350
00:12:58,311 --> 00:12:59,622
Oh!
I'll be back shortly
with supplies.

351
00:12:59,646 --> 00:13:00,646
Okay!

352
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,951
Ah, Mr. Dunphy!
How are...

353
00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:06,086
we this evening?

354
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,087
Not so good.

355
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,621
I'm in a tight spot
with my lady.

356
00:13:08,655 --> 00:13:09,923
Ah.
You know what might help?

357
00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:12,125
One of those... one
of those luxury baths.

358
00:13:12,159 --> 00:13:15,262
Ah, get yourself out of some hot
water by getting her into some.

359
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:16,463
Wow, so good.

360
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:18,265
Might i suggest
the Michael bublé bath?

361
00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:19,632
You are a mind reader.

362
00:13:19,666 --> 00:13:20,767
I'm not a mind reader, sir.

363
00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,445
I've just been in
the bath-buttling business

364
00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:24,113
since the early '90s,
despite my fresh face,

365
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:25,849
so i tend to know
what these situations need.

366
00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,841
I'll get
the water going.
As you wish.

367
00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:29,642
Same price either way.

368
00:13:29,676 --> 00:13:31,879
Burt says he's gonna be here
any minute.

369
00:13:31,912 --> 00:13:34,281
We got to really lay it on
for this guy...

370
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:36,449
Best scotch, put on
something sexy.

371
00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:39,452
[ Gasps ] I...
Have a great idea!

372
00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:40,620
Cigars!

373
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:42,455
A man like Burt appreciates
a good cigar.

374
00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:43,656
Good thinking!

375
00:13:43,690 --> 00:13:46,126
Of course, upstairs, the Butler
would be here already.

376
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,794
I'm telling you,
we might as well

377
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,329
be sleeping in the basement.

378
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:53,633
I said hold it, not deliver it!

379
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:56,469
[ Breathing heavily ]
Okay, there.

380
00:13:56,503 --> 00:13:57,637
Come here.

381
00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:00,040
Stay in Claire's room.

382
00:14:01,208 --> 00:14:02,175
[ Thump ]

383
00:14:02,209 --> 00:14:04,177
Hey, honey.
I'm in the bathroom.

384
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:07,747
Honey?

385
00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:09,416
Okay, i-i know i messed up,

386
00:14:09,449 --> 00:14:11,919
but sit tight... i got
a little surprise for you.

387
00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:13,753
Higgins, you got a minute?

388
00:14:13,786 --> 00:14:15,755
60 an hour. They all
belong to you, sir.

389
00:14:15,788 --> 00:14:17,925
I need a couple
of primo cigars, a.S.A.P.

390
00:14:17,958 --> 00:14:20,093
I'm not a stickler for
how they got in the country.

391
00:14:20,127 --> 00:14:22,429
I'm also expecting
a special scotch delivery.

392
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:25,098
I need a shave.
Burt can't see me like this.

393
00:14:25,132 --> 00:14:26,775
Unfortunately, the
shaving butlers are all...

394
00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:27,935
I know, excelsior plus.

395
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:28,936
[ Door opens ]

396
00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:29,937
Are you decent?
I am.

397
00:14:29,970 --> 00:14:31,271
Well, not for long.

398
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:33,440
My partner should be here
any minute.
Is it me, sir,

399
00:14:33,473 --> 00:14:35,943
or is the air positively fizzing
with erotic anticipation?

400
00:14:35,976 --> 00:14:37,344
Yeah.

401
00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:38,955
Oh, i forgot the ice.
Oh, yeah,
I'm gonna get it.

402
00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:40,089
Oh, i couldn't ask you
to do that.

403
00:14:40,113 --> 00:14:41,414
No, not a problem.
As you wish.

404
00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:42,815
Same price either way.

405
00:14:45,452 --> 00:14:47,154
[ Elevator bell dings ]

406
00:14:49,289 --> 00:14:50,490
[ Sighs ]

407
00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:57,430
Oh, i-I'm sorry.
I-I'm looking for Mitchell.

408
00:14:57,464 --> 00:14:58,607
Oh, yeah, he's expecting you.

409
00:14:58,631 --> 00:15:00,543
In fact, he's asked me
to draw the two of you a bath.

410
00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:02,102
Wow.

411
00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:03,603
This is crazy.
Yeah.

412
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:05,472
I believe that's the plan.

413
00:15:06,473 --> 00:15:08,208
Enjoy.

414
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,309
Thank you.

415
00:15:18,851 --> 00:15:20,920
Oh, good. You're back.
How's Claire seem?

416
00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:22,932
I'm sorry?
You must have seen her
out there. Is she mad?

417
00:15:22,956 --> 00:15:23,957
W-what's she doing?

418
00:15:25,292 --> 00:15:26,926
Uh, she's dusting, sir.

419
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,595
Oh, she always cleans
when she's mad.

420
00:15:28,628 --> 00:15:29,963
Do me a favor...

421
00:15:29,997 --> 00:15:32,008
Bring her a drink and tell her
to get comfortable on the couch.

422
00:15:32,032 --> 00:15:34,001
She's... she's allowed
on the furniture, is she?

423
00:15:34,034 --> 00:15:36,136
[ Both laugh ]

424
00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:38,305
She's my wife.

425
00:15:41,041 --> 00:15:43,343
[ Whistling ]
Oh, good!
I've been looking for you.

426
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:44,620
Well, you should
have been looking

427
00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:46,084
for somebody who
was looking for you,

428
00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:47,256
because that's what i was doing.

429
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,748
Come on, i have a surprise
for you.

430
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:50,083
[ Muffled techno music plays ]

431
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:51,584
Oh...

432
00:15:51,618 --> 00:15:52,752
Yeah, i-I've been
thinking

433
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,121
we need to stop
being so uptight.

434
00:15:54,154 --> 00:15:56,823
We are in Vegas.
Let's have a little fun.

435
00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:58,634
Well, I'll have to wrap
my head around that, but okay.

436
00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:00,003
Now, i have just the way
to kick it off...

437
00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:01,594
Something we could do together.

438
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,596
It's a little extreme,

439
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,832
but i think it might be
just what we need.
Okay.

440
00:16:05,865 --> 00:16:06,833
Go on in.

441
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:08,968
[ Techno music playing ]

442
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:12,639
Are you crazy?

443
00:16:12,672 --> 00:16:14,441
Oh, come on, cam,
we deserve this.

444
00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:15,842
All right, you get started,

445
00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,810
and then I'll jump in
when it starts to heat up.

446
00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:20,780
Mitchell!
Come on. Then i will
throw you into it, tiger.

447
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,282
Rub a dub dub.

448
00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:23,950
[ Laughs ]
Dear, no.

449
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,118
Langham.

450
00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:26,786
[ Music stops ]
Both of you?

451
00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:27,954
Huh. Well, okay.

452
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:30,490
No. No. No, not okay.
What are you doing here?

453
00:16:30,523 --> 00:16:31,624
You gave me your room key.

454
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:33,460
What?!
Don't act so shocked.

455
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:34,794
You told me
at the bachelor party

456
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:35,838
you two lead separate lives.

457
00:16:35,862 --> 00:16:37,297
You went to the bachelor party?

458
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,632
Yes, and i was starting to feel
bad about sneaking around,

459
00:16:39,666 --> 00:16:40,967
but i guess i shouldn't have,

460
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,469
now that i see
what you're up to.

461
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,971
I'm not up to anything!
I left my key by mistake.

462
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:47,474
We're all obviously tense.

463
00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:49,976
Let's take a deep breath...

464
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,078
Get in the tub...

465
00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:52,812
That's not happening.
[ Knock on door ]

466
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,081
You want to tell me

467
00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:56,416
how you "accidentally"
gave someone your key?

468
00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:58,085
You want to tell me
why you spent all day

469
00:16:58,118 --> 00:16:59,752
sipping Tequila
out of some guy's navel?

470
00:16:59,786 --> 00:17:01,754
You saw that?
I guessed.

471
00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:03,323
Hi, guys.
What's going on?

472
00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:05,425
Hey, Claire. Can you
please just come back?

473
00:17:05,458 --> 00:17:07,436
We're in the middle
of an argument.
Oh.
Bet i know why.

474
00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:09,596
Are you guys getting
in the bath?

475
00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:10,763
Or I'm way off.

476
00:17:10,797 --> 00:17:11,764
[ Knock on door ]

477
00:17:11,798 --> 00:17:13,266
Tim:
Langham!
It's Tim.

478
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:16,169
He can't know I'm here.
He has insane trust issues.
Insane?

479
00:17:16,203 --> 00:17:18,771
[ Knocking continues ]
Langham,
are you in there?

480
00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:20,273
Go out
this door.
In here.

481
00:17:20,307 --> 00:17:22,609
Jay:
Gloria, hurry up, will you?

482
00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:23,576
[ Door closes ]

483
00:17:23,610 --> 00:17:25,745
He's on his way up.
I need to shave.

484
00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:27,914
Oh, you're here.

485
00:17:27,947 --> 00:17:29,582
Jay pritchett.
Thanks for stopping by.

486
00:17:29,616 --> 00:17:31,451
Nice robe.
Like hef, back in the day.

487
00:17:31,484 --> 00:17:32,785
I'm gonna cut to the chase.

488
00:17:32,819 --> 00:17:35,922
I like your lifestyle.
I want a taste of it.

489
00:17:35,955 --> 00:17:37,624
Well, s-sure,
that's flattering, but...

490
00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:40,427
Gloria: Okay,
the bathroom is all you...
Gloria,
it's Burt Tanner!

491
00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:42,762
That's not Burt Tanner,
that's long-ham.

492
00:17:42,795 --> 00:17:43,763
[ Knock on door ]

493
00:17:43,796 --> 00:17:44,764
Tim:
Langham!

494
00:17:44,797 --> 00:17:47,867
What's that thing doing here?

495
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:50,603
Just enjoying a dirty
Martini before a cleansing
romp in the bath.

496
00:17:50,637 --> 00:17:52,105
That's not who the bath is for.

497
00:17:52,139 --> 00:17:53,473
[ Door opens ]

498
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:56,409
Oh, my mistake.

499
00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:58,745
Welcome... Claire.

500
00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:02,249
You're certainly gonna
be clean by the end of
the night, aren't you?

501
00:18:02,282 --> 00:18:04,951
Jay, i forgot
all my hair products!

502
00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:06,753
I'm going to borrow from Claire.

503
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:08,321
Okay, the coast is clear.

504
00:18:12,325 --> 00:18:13,493
[ Door closes ]
Eee!

505
00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:15,262
Ay.

506
00:18:15,295 --> 00:18:17,964
Huh? Jay!

507
00:18:17,997 --> 00:18:19,332
Go, go, go, go, go, go.

508
00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:21,334
Hey.
Phil, there you are.

509
00:18:21,368 --> 00:18:23,102
Ducky! How'd you know
where i was?

510
00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:24,471
Magicians run this town.

511
00:18:24,504 --> 00:18:25,472
Really?

512
00:18:25,505 --> 00:18:27,274
No. I'm a shaving Butler
up on plus.

513
00:18:27,307 --> 00:18:29,576
Look, i felt bad about
how things went down today,

514
00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:31,578
and i-i just wanted
to give you another shot.

515
00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,280
[ Door opens ]
[ Gasps ]

516
00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:35,782
Phil:
Right this way.

517
00:18:35,815 --> 00:18:38,585
I really think you're gonna
like what you see.

518
00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:40,620
Okay, let me just get
everything set up.

519
00:18:40,653 --> 00:18:42,589
[ Clears throat ]

520
00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,291
Metamorphosis.

521
00:18:44,324 --> 00:18:47,927
They say the only constant
is change.

522
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,263
I-I'm sorry, what...
I... s... what is that?

523
00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:52,932
Oh, i don't even know.
Something my wife bought.

524
00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:55,001
Let me just get rid of it.
Here we go.

525
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:58,305
Really, uh, rubbing it in
on that wife thing, huh?

526
00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:01,808
Metamorphosis.

527
00:19:03,009 --> 00:19:04,043
Burt!
[ Chuckles ]

528
00:19:04,076 --> 00:19:05,612
Nice of you to come down a floor

529
00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:07,980
and see how
the other half lives.
[ Both chuckle ]

530
00:19:08,014 --> 00:19:09,282
If you will,

531
00:19:09,316 --> 00:19:12,285
raise it above my head
and pinch it at my wrists.

532
00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:14,153
Go ahead and make it
good and tight.

533
00:19:14,187 --> 00:19:15,622
Don't be easy on me.

534
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:16,789
Okay.

535
00:19:16,823 --> 00:19:18,958
Now...
[ Clears throat ]

536
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:23,463
As the lowly caterpillar
becomes the majestic butterfly,

537
00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:26,799
as the tiny acorn
becomes the mighty oak,

538
00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:32,639
so, too, do we complete
our... Metamorphosis.

539
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:35,242
So, it's the governor's bluff.

540
00:19:35,275 --> 00:19:37,577
Well, it's a huge twist
on the governor's bluff.

541
00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:38,745
Eh.

542
00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:40,079
No, no, no, no, no!

543
00:19:40,112 --> 00:19:41,990
There were other elements.
You just kind of threw me off.

544
00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:44,517
I forgot... i was gonna... as a
flourish i was gonna use one...

545
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:48,488
Hola.

546
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:49,922
A... that's amazing!

547
00:19:49,956 --> 00:19:52,825
Y-you lull me with this...
With this hacky quick change,

548
00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:55,662
and the whole time,
you're changing the fake
dog into a hot maid?

549
00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:57,096
It's brilliant!
It's magic!

550
00:19:57,129 --> 00:20:01,934
No, that's metamorphosis!

551
00:20:01,968 --> 00:20:04,604
Like you, Burt, i enjoy
the finer things.
[ Knock on door ]

552
00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:08,275
As a matter of fact,
that's probably the Cuban
i ordered for you.

553
00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:09,642
Hola.

554
00:20:12,279 --> 00:20:13,589
Cam, if you wanted
a bachelor party,

555
00:20:13,613 --> 00:20:14,923
you should have just
said something.

556
00:20:14,947 --> 00:20:17,750
Well, i didn't know i wanted one
until we got here.

557
00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:19,419
And you're so "eh, eh, eh,"

558
00:20:19,452 --> 00:20:21,621
i-i was afraid
to say anything.
Okay, all right.

559
00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:22,789
Lucky for the two of you,

560
00:20:22,822 --> 00:20:24,757
i know you better
than you know yourselves,

561
00:20:24,791 --> 00:20:28,695
and what the two of you need
is a little guilty pleasure,

562
00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:30,297
or should i say...

563
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:35,944
The scotch delivery you had me
on the lookout for, sir.

564
00:20:35,968 --> 00:20:37,637
[ Bagpipe music plays ]

565
00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:45,578
I like your style, pritchett.

566
00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:47,747
You're in.

567
00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:49,248
Vegas.

568
00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:51,818
This reminds me
of my late grandfather.
He was Scottish?

569
00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:52,985
He was a stripper.
Oh.

570
00:20:57,624 --> 00:20:58,758
There we go.

571
00:20:58,791 --> 00:21:00,159
You've got the touch, kid.

572
00:21:00,192 --> 00:21:02,462
I was blessed with my mother's
small hands, sir.

573
00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:04,096
Shall i order
your complimentary,

574
00:21:04,130 --> 00:21:05,465
in-room,
hot-stone massage?

575
00:21:05,498 --> 00:21:06,766
Complimentary?

576
00:21:06,799 --> 00:21:09,436
All part of the excelsior-plus
experience, sir.

577
00:21:09,469 --> 00:21:11,971
Might be nice after a dip
in your private lap pool.

578
00:21:12,004 --> 00:21:14,607
Oh, where has this been
all my life?
[ Chuckles ]

579
00:21:14,641 --> 00:21:16,909
You know, i saw a harpist
in the elevator.

580
00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:19,078
Can we get that
for our brunch tomorrow?

581
00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:21,314
If it was up to me, yes,
but unfortunately,

582
00:21:21,348 --> 00:21:25,752
that is reserved for our
excelsior-ultra guests only.

583
00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:30,323
62, 63, 64!
Son of a bitch!