1 00:00:03,204 --> 00:00:05,206 OKAY, GLORIA, JUST MAKE SURE JAY DOESN'T FIND OUT. 2 00:00:05,238 --> 00:00:06,706 OH. BOY. [ LAUGHS ] 3 00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,208 [ Laughing ] I JUST HEARD THAT. 4 00:00:08,242 --> 00:00:09,577 YOU PROBABLY THINK THERE'S SOMETHING 5 00:00:09,609 --> 00:00:10,678 BETWEEN ME AND GLORIA. 6 00:00:10,711 --> 00:00:12,179 RELAX. 7 00:00:12,212 --> 00:00:13,881 I COULDN'T BE MORE RELAXED IF I WAS IN A COMA. 8 00:00:13,913 --> 00:00:16,050 JAY'S GRILL WAS DELIVERED. 9 00:00:16,083 --> 00:00:17,318 SHE'S KEEPING IT UNDER WRAPS 10 00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:18,652 SO I CAN BE THERE WHEN HE SEES IT! 11 00:00:18,686 --> 00:00:19,920 Alex: OH, MY GOD! 12 00:00:19,952 --> 00:00:21,388 I JUST GOT ACCEPTED INTO CALTECH. 13 00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:22,655 YOU DID?! 14 00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:24,057 THAT IS INCREDIBLE! 15 00:00:24,091 --> 00:00:26,527 WE'RE GONNA HAVE A FAMOUS SCIENTIST IN THE FAMILY! 16 00:00:26,559 --> 00:00:29,230 UH, NOT THAT THERE'S ANY SHAME IN LEARNING A TRADE. 17 00:00:29,263 --> 00:00:31,399 AIR CONDITIONERS ARE ALWAYS GONNA BREAK. 18 00:00:31,431 --> 00:00:33,567 EH, I LOOKED INTO IT. IT'S A LOT OF CLASSES. 19 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,270 HONEY, THAT IS UNBELIEVABLE. 20 00:00:36,304 --> 00:00:37,871 IT'S HARDLY UNBELIEVABLE. 21 00:00:37,905 --> 00:00:39,707 SUPER-SMART KID, SUPER-SMART SCHOOL. 22 00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:41,040 I NEVER DOUBTED YOU. 23 00:00:41,075 --> 00:00:42,076 THAT MUST FEEL GREAT. 24 00:00:42,109 --> 00:00:44,043 YEP. PRETTY GREAT. 25 00:00:45,612 --> 00:00:46,713 WHAT WAS THAT? 26 00:00:46,746 --> 00:00:47,847 I THINK THAT WAS MY FAULT. 27 00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,216 ME TOO. WHY? 28 00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,683 [ SIGHS ] I DO THIS ALL THE TIME. 29 00:00:50,718 --> 00:00:52,786 SHE DOES THESE AMAZING THINGS, AND I'M SO USED TO IT, 30 00:00:52,820 --> 00:00:54,787 I DON'T EVEN MAKE A BIG DEAL OVER CALTECH. 31 00:00:54,822 --> 00:00:56,223 I GOT EXCITED. DOESN'T THAT COUNT? 32 00:00:56,256 --> 00:00:57,957 WELL, HONEY, YOU GET EXCITED OVER EVERYTHING. 33 00:00:57,990 --> 00:00:59,560 YOU'RE A BORN CHEERLEADER. 34 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:02,195 I JUST NEED TO MAKE A REALLY BIG FUSS OVER ALEX TODAY. 35 00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:04,364 THAT'S ALL. I KNOW -- YOU'RE UPSET 36 00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:05,632 BECAUSE I SAID THAT YOU WERE A BORN -- 37 00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:07,200 THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A BORN CHEERLEADER. 38 00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:08,902 IT TAKES HARD WORK AND SACRIFICE. 39 00:01:08,936 --> 00:01:10,704 YOU KNOW WHAT A HUMAN PYRAMID IS WITHOUT HOURS OF TRAINING? 40 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:11,772 MNH-MNH. 41 00:01:11,805 --> 00:01:13,073 10 OBITUARIES. 42 00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:16,075 -- Captions by VITAC -- 43 00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:19,146 *** 44 00:01:26,486 --> 00:01:27,920 HEY, I THINK MY DAD IS REALLY GONNA ENJOY 45 00:01:27,954 --> 00:01:29,390 RETURNING HIS GIFT THIS YEAR. 46 00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:31,591 [ Laughing ] MITCHELL, I HAVE SOME REALLY SAD NEWS. 47 00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:33,227 YES, YOU SEEM VERY BROKEN UP. 48 00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:36,063 APPARENTLY, I HAD AN UNCLE, UH, CYRUS, 49 00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:39,766 WHO DIED AND OUT OF THE BLUE LEFT ME A PRETTY HANDSOME SUM. 50 00:01:39,799 --> 00:01:41,602 I-I GUESS HE DIDN'T HAVE A LOT OF OTHER KIN. 51 00:01:41,634 --> 00:01:43,971 OKAY, THIS IS THE ONE TIME I DON'T MIND YOU SAYING "KIN." 52 00:01:44,003 --> 00:01:45,338 NOW, WHEN YOU SAY "HANDSOME," 53 00:01:45,372 --> 00:01:47,240 ARE WE TALKING CARPOOL DAD AT LILY'S SCHOOL 54 00:01:47,275 --> 00:01:49,242 OR ARE WE IN A MORE CLOONEY/PITT AREA? 55 00:01:49,277 --> 00:01:51,412 MM. I WOULD SAY MORE HARRY HAMLIN. 56 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:52,780 OH. THAT'S NOT BAD AT -- 57 00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:54,647 [ Chuckling ] THAT'S NOT BAD AT ALL. 58 00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:56,750 YOU KNOW, AND THIS IS CRAZY, BECAUSE, UM, I JUST SAW 59 00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:59,319 THAT THE UPSTAIRS UNIT WENT BACK ON THE MARKET, 60 00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:01,754 AND HARRY HAMLIN WOULD ALMOST EQUAL A DOWN PAYMENT, AND -- 61 00:02:01,789 --> 00:02:03,090 I'M -- I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. 62 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:04,825 LOOK AT ME, SPENDING YOUR MONEY. 63 00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:07,161 NO, MITCHELL, IT'S NOT MY MONEY. IT'S OUR MONEY. 64 00:02:07,194 --> 00:02:08,996 I-IS THIS A SIGN, CAM? 65 00:02:09,028 --> 00:02:11,365 I MEAN, WE TALK ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME. 66 00:02:11,399 --> 00:02:13,433 WE SHOULD BUY THAT UPSTAIRS APARTMENT. 67 00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:15,703 I DON'T SEE A REASON WHY NOT! 68 00:02:15,735 --> 00:02:17,971 THIS IS SO EXCITING. I KNOW. 69 00:02:18,004 --> 00:02:20,473 I'M REALLY PROUD OF YOU, BECAUSE THERE WAS A TIME 70 00:02:20,508 --> 00:02:22,776 WHEN I WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN SEEN THIS CHECK. 71 00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:25,612 OH, WELL, YES. YOU KNOW, I USED TO BE QUITE THE IMPULSE BUYER. 72 00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:27,948 BUT I DON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE THAT GUY ANYMORE. 73 00:02:27,980 --> 00:02:30,016 I LOVE MY NEW FAUX MINK, DADDY. 74 00:02:30,050 --> 00:02:32,319 I FORGOT -- WHICH GABOR SISTER AM I? 75 00:02:32,353 --> 00:02:34,021 Y-YOU'RE EVA, THE CLASSY ONE, BUT LISTEN. 76 00:02:34,054 --> 00:02:36,055 WE NEED TO KEEP THE TAGS ON IT, BECAUSE IT'S GOING BACK. 77 00:02:36,088 --> 00:02:37,724 WELL, THEN YOURS IS GOING BACK, TOO. 78 00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:39,360 NO, THAT'S A HARD THING, 79 00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:41,895 BECAUSE THE SALESLADY SAID I LOOK LIKE DR. ZHIVAGO. 80 00:02:44,231 --> 00:02:45,799 SO, IS THAT A BIRTHDAY PRESENT FOR YOU 81 00:02:45,832 --> 00:02:47,835 OR AN EXTREMELY LATE MID-LIFE CRISIS? 82 00:02:47,867 --> 00:02:50,304 I DON'T THINK "EXTREMELY" IS NECESSARY. 83 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:53,341 IT'S ON LOAN -- KIND OF A WEEKEND-LONG TEST-DRIVE. 84 00:02:53,373 --> 00:02:54,908 WOW -- I WALK INTO A STORE, 85 00:02:54,942 --> 00:02:57,344 THEY MAKE ME LEAVE MY BACKPACK BEHIND THE COUNTER. 86 00:02:57,377 --> 00:02:59,079 IT'S AN OLD CAR SALESMAN'S TRICK. 87 00:02:59,111 --> 00:03:01,414 THEY'RE HOPING I FALL IN LOVE WITH IT AND NEVER GIVE IT BACK. 88 00:03:01,449 --> 00:03:03,182 BUT I CAN'T JUSTIFY BUYING IT 89 00:03:03,217 --> 00:03:05,686 ANY MORE THAN YOU CAN JUSTIFY THAT HAT. 90 00:03:05,718 --> 00:03:07,655 LITTLE EARLY FOR TEQUILA, ISN'T IT? 91 00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:09,223 IT'S FOR LUKE. 92 00:03:09,257 --> 00:03:11,024 NOT SURE THAT'S BETTER. THE LAST TIME HE WAS HERE, 93 00:03:11,057 --> 00:03:13,227 HE WAS EYEING THIS BOTTLE THE SAME WAY YOU LOOK AT ME 94 00:03:13,260 --> 00:03:15,329 WHEN I WEAR THAT STRAPPY SUNDRESS. 95 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:16,563 I DO LIKE THAT DRESS. 96 00:03:16,597 --> 00:03:18,064 I AM GOING TO CATCH HIM RED-HANDED. 97 00:03:18,098 --> 00:03:20,000 I AM GOING TO TEACH HIM A LESSON. 98 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:22,034 BUT FIRST I'M GOING TO REFILL THIS WITH WATER 99 00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:23,736 IN CASE HE GETS PAST ME. 100 00:03:23,771 --> 00:03:25,406 YOU KNOW, WE HAVE A LITTLE TIME BEFORE THE FAMILY COMES. 101 00:03:25,438 --> 00:03:26,907 WHY DON'T YOU THROW THAT DRESS ON AND -- 102 00:03:26,939 --> 00:03:27,941 [ DOORBELL RINGS ] 103 00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:29,009 AW, DAMN IT. 104 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,243 ANDY, CAN YOU GET THAT? 105 00:03:30,277 --> 00:03:32,413 ANDY? SORRY. 106 00:03:32,445 --> 00:03:34,014 I TUNED OUT WHEN YOU STARTED FLIRTING 107 00:03:34,046 --> 00:03:36,115 TO GIVE YOU SOME PRIVACY. 108 00:03:36,149 --> 00:03:37,718 [ BREATHES DEEPLY ] 109 00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,453 I WAS SEEING HALEY FOR THE FIRST TIME 110 00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:41,454 SINCE SHE CAME TO VISIT ME IN THE HOSPITAL. 111 00:03:41,489 --> 00:03:43,456 SHE SAID SOME PRETTY HEAVY STUFF. 112 00:03:43,490 --> 00:03:45,925 IF I'M YOUR ELEPHANT, YOU HAVE A SHOT. 113 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:47,795 THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY, DUMMY. 114 00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:49,729 SHE DIDN'T KNOW I HEARD. 115 00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:51,198 I TRIED FOR A COUPLE WEEKS 116 00:03:51,230 --> 00:03:52,900 TO FORGET ABOUT IT AND JUST GO ON WITH BETH, 117 00:03:52,932 --> 00:03:55,368 BUT I COULDN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT HALEY. 118 00:03:55,402 --> 00:04:00,073 SO...TODAY'S THE DAY I'M FINALLY GONNA HAVE THE BIG TALK. 119 00:04:00,106 --> 00:04:03,242 THERE'S A COOLER OF DRINKS OUT BACK! HELP YOURSELVES! 120 00:04:03,276 --> 00:04:05,878 HEY. WHERE'S HALEY? IS SHE COMING? 121 00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:07,980 THE LAST TIME HALEY INFORMED ME OF HER PLANS, SHE SAID, 122 00:04:08,014 --> 00:04:09,917 "HA HA. I'M GOING TO CABO, AND YOU'RE NOT." 123 00:04:09,949 --> 00:04:11,585 [ CHUCKLES ] SHE'S THE BEST. 124 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:16,956 GET READY TO SEE THE BEST GIFT EVER. 125 00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:18,425 HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 126 00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:20,494 IT'S A GRILL. I GOT A GRILL. 127 00:04:20,528 --> 00:04:22,795 YOU HAD A WIFE, TOO. DIDN'T MEAN YOU COULDN'T TRADE UP. 128 00:04:22,829 --> 00:04:24,731 I GIVE YOU THE FLAME XL. 129 00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:26,500 MY CLIENT OWNS THE COMPANY. 130 00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:28,336 HE GAVE ME A CRAZY-GOOD DEAL. 131 00:04:28,369 --> 00:04:30,303 25,000 WOOD PROPANE BTUs. 132 00:04:30,338 --> 00:04:31,471 THAT'S...PLENTY, RIGHT? 133 00:04:31,504 --> 00:04:34,240 NO. ELECTRIC ROTISSERIE! 134 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,745 IF GOD WANTS A HAMBURGER, THIS IS WHAT SHE COOKS IT ON. 135 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,312 BUT IT'S GOT ALL THOSE DOODADS. 136 00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:41,247 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THOSE DOODADS. 137 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,615 YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB 138 00:04:42,649 --> 00:04:44,250 OF HIDING YOUR EXCITEMENT ABOUT THIS GIFT. 139 00:04:44,283 --> 00:04:45,752 LOOK. IT'S SIMPLICITY ITSELF. 140 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,120 YOU JUST TURN ON THE GAS, HIT THE ELECTRIC STARTER. 141 00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,189 [ HISSING, CLICKING ] 142 00:04:49,221 --> 00:04:50,923 HIT THE ELECTRIC STARTER. 143 00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,158 PHIL, YOU MIGHT WANT TO LAY OFF -- 144 00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:53,360 AAH! 145 00:04:53,394 --> 00:04:54,293 I'M FINE. 146 00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:55,963 HEALTHY AS EVER. 147 00:04:55,995 --> 00:04:58,699 I'D KNOW IF YOU WEREN'T, 'CAUSE I JUST SAW YOUR SKELETON. 148 00:04:58,731 --> 00:05:00,367 Gloria: OKAY, JOE. 149 00:05:00,401 --> 00:05:02,636 [ Singsong voice ] TIME FOR A NAP IN YOUR NEW BED! 150 00:05:05,838 --> 00:05:07,841 LOOKING FOR SOMETHING? AAH! 151 00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:09,543 UH, YEAH -- YOU. [ CHUCKLES ] 152 00:05:09,576 --> 00:05:12,211 I JUST WANTED TO SAY WHAT A NICE PARTY YOU PUT TOGETHER. 153 00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:14,348 THE SECRET IS TO KNOW WHAT YOUR GUESTS WANT, 154 00:05:14,382 --> 00:05:16,048 AND I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. 155 00:05:16,082 --> 00:05:17,951 HEY, LUKE, QUICK LESSON. 156 00:05:17,985 --> 00:05:20,353 THIS IS A COASTER. IT PREVENTS RINGS. 157 00:05:20,387 --> 00:05:22,322 THANKS TO YOU AND YOUR DR PEPPER, 158 00:05:22,355 --> 00:05:25,158 MY TEAK END TABLE UPSTAIRS LOOKS LIKE THE OLYMPIC FLAG. 159 00:05:25,192 --> 00:05:26,459 THINK, LUKE. 160 00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:29,329 YES. THINK, LUKE. 161 00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:33,300 Did you get it? 162 00:05:33,332 --> 00:05:34,634 YEP. 163 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,235 SWEET MEXICAN TREASURE. 164 00:05:36,269 --> 00:05:38,406 I WAS BORN IN FLORIDA, BUT THANK YOU. 165 00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:40,139 SO, YOU REALLY THINK YOU'RE GONNA BUY IT? 166 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,307 I MEAN, IT MAKES SENSE. 167 00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:42,675 WE'RE KIND OF CRAMPED WHERE WE ARE. 168 00:05:42,709 --> 00:05:44,677 THERE SHE IS -- OUR LITTLE GENIUS. 169 00:05:44,711 --> 00:05:46,146 SHE JUST GOT ACCEPTED TO CALTECH. 170 00:05:46,178 --> 00:05:47,380 OH, THAT'S AMAZING! MM-HMM. 171 00:05:47,415 --> 00:05:49,016 IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL. 172 00:05:49,048 --> 00:05:50,384 IT'S A HUGE DEAL! 173 00:05:50,418 --> 00:05:52,185 THAT SCHOOL PUMPS OUT NOBEL PRIZE WINNERS 174 00:05:52,218 --> 00:05:54,254 THE WAY MY SCHOOL PUMPED OUT STOMACHS. 175 00:05:54,286 --> 00:05:56,590 ENOUGH, MOM! 176 00:05:56,624 --> 00:05:59,393 UH... WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT? [ SIGHS ] 177 00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:01,528 I DIDN'T MAKE A BIG ENOUGH FUSS ABOUT HER GETTING INTO CALTECH, 178 00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:03,163 AND NOW SHE'S MAKING ME PAY. 179 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,197 WELL, IF THAT'S HER GIVING YOU A HARD TIME, 180 00:06:05,232 --> 00:06:07,567 I THINK YOU GOT OFF PRETTY EASY. WELL, THAT'S TRUE. 181 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:09,603 THAT ONE NEVER REALLY WENT THROUGH A REBELLIOUS PHASE. 182 00:06:09,637 --> 00:06:11,605 [ CHUCKLES ] REMEMBER HOW WILD WE WERE? 183 00:06:11,639 --> 00:06:13,540 [ Chuckling ] OHH! 184 00:06:13,574 --> 00:06:14,841 WERE WE EVER! 185 00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:15,875 [ CHUCKLES ] 186 00:06:15,908 --> 00:06:17,444 [ Sighing ] OHH. 187 00:06:17,478 --> 00:06:18,745 WERE WE EVER? 188 00:06:18,778 --> 00:06:20,047 NOT REALLY, NO. 189 00:06:20,079 --> 00:06:21,581 YOU HAD YOUR SUMMER OF THE RED AFRO, 190 00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:23,750 AND I DATED THE WHITEST PUERTO RICAN ON EARTH. 191 00:06:23,783 --> 00:06:25,685 OH, WAYNE. YEAH. YEAH. 192 00:06:25,718 --> 00:06:27,521 HEY, BUT IT'S NOT LIKE WE DIDN'T SEPARATE 193 00:06:27,555 --> 00:06:28,721 AND STRIKE OUT ON OUR OWN. 194 00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:30,389 YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT. AM I RIGHT? HUH? 195 00:06:30,423 --> 00:06:31,591 [ CHUCKLES ] AHHHH. 196 00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:34,194 DAD BOUGHT ME MY HOUSE. OURS, TOO. 197 00:06:34,226 --> 00:06:35,696 HE LOANED US THE MONEY FOR THE DOWN PAYMENT. 198 00:06:35,728 --> 00:06:37,798 WE NEVER PAID HIM BACK. I'VE ALWAYS FELT SO GUILTY. 199 00:06:37,831 --> 00:06:40,100 YOU KNOW, HE GAVE US OUR DOWN PAYMENT, TOO. 200 00:06:40,132 --> 00:06:41,802 ARE YOU SURE THAT WASN'T A GIFT? 201 00:06:41,834 --> 00:06:43,704 WELL, I NEVER OFFERED TO PAY HIM BACK. I DON'T KNOW. 202 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:45,204 AND THEN HE JUST GAVE ME THIS BONUS AT WORK. 203 00:06:45,237 --> 00:06:46,807 OY. WHAT HE MUST THINK OF ME. 204 00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,808 [ SIGHS ] IT'S SO LONG AGO NOW. 205 00:06:48,841 --> 00:06:50,478 WELL, STILL. 206 00:06:50,511 --> 00:06:52,779 I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD OFFER TO PAY HIM BACK. 207 00:06:52,812 --> 00:06:54,615 WHAT -- NO. N-NO. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, CLAIRE. 208 00:06:54,648 --> 00:06:56,249 BECAUSE THEN I'M GONNA HAVE TO PAY HIM BACK, 209 00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:57,750 AND I'LL BE STUCK IN THE SAME SHOE BOX 210 00:06:57,784 --> 00:06:59,052 HE BOUGHT ME LAST TIME. 211 00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:00,653 MITCHELL, HE'S NOT GOING TO ACCEPT IT. 212 00:07:00,687 --> 00:07:02,055 IT'S JUST A GESTURE. 213 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,492 WE DO IT SO W FEEL MORE INDEPENDENT. 214 00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:05,826 JUST DO IT. 215 00:07:05,858 --> 00:07:06,894 [ SIGHS ] DO IT! 216 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,127 DO WHAT? OH, NOTHING. 217 00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:09,463 YOU'RE BUSY. NOT REALLY. 218 00:07:09,497 --> 00:07:11,464 PHIL'S TINKERING WITH THE NEW GRILL, 219 00:07:11,499 --> 00:07:13,000 SO YOU BETTER COLLECT SOME OLD PHOTOGRAPHS FOR THE MEMORIAL. 220 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:14,601 OH. DO WHAT? 221 00:07:14,634 --> 00:07:16,002 UH... 222 00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:18,305 WELL, UM, YOU PROBABLY DON'T REMEMBER THIS. 223 00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:20,072 BUT, UH, A WHILE BACK, 224 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,810 YOU GAVE US SOME MONEY FOR A DOWN PAYMENT. 225 00:07:22,843 --> 00:07:25,345 VERY GENEROUSLY, I MIGHT ADD. YES. 226 00:07:25,377 --> 00:07:27,747 AND NOT JUST 'CAUSE IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY... THAT'S RIGHT. 227 00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:30,483 ...BUT WE WANTED TO AT LEAST MAKE THE OFFER 228 00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:34,153 TO PAY...YOU...BACK. 229 00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:36,156 MITCHELL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I CAN'T CASH THIS. 230 00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:37,591 NOW, DAD, I -- 231 00:07:37,625 --> 00:07:39,192 YOU GOT TO SIGN IT FIRST. 232 00:07:39,225 --> 00:07:40,927 OKAY, UH, IN THAT CASE, 233 00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:43,262 I'M GONNA NEED TO GET THE PEN BACK FROM -- CLAIRE! 234 00:07:43,295 --> 00:07:44,531 GOT ONE RIGHT HERE. OH. OKAY. 235 00:07:49,536 --> 00:07:50,603 HEY, YOU. 236 00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:51,971 OH. HEY. 237 00:07:52,004 --> 00:07:53,807 I DIDN'T EXPECT TO SEE YOU HERE TODAY. 238 00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:55,341 HOW YOU FEELING? 239 00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:57,677 BETTER. TURNS OUT YOU DON'T EVEN NEED AN APPENDIX. 240 00:07:57,711 --> 00:07:59,211 I DON'T EVEN MISS IT ANYMORE. 241 00:07:59,245 --> 00:08:01,014 IT'S LIKE CIRCUIT CITY. 242 00:08:01,048 --> 00:08:04,184 ANYWAY, I'VE BEEN WANTING TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING. 243 00:08:04,216 --> 00:08:05,519 THIS HOUSE IS FANTASTIC. 244 00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:07,387 I SHOULD HAVE GONE INTO THE CLOSET BUSINESS. 245 00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:08,855 [ CHUCKLES ] RIGHT? 246 00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:10,790 I'M GIVING HIM A TOUR. ANDY, THIS IS WILL. 247 00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:12,593 HI. NICE TO MEET YOU. 248 00:08:13,661 --> 00:08:14,694 [ CELLPHONE RINGS ] 249 00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:15,862 I'M SORRY. I HAVE TO TAKE THIS. 250 00:08:15,896 --> 00:08:17,430 IT'S THE HOSPITAL. 251 00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:20,367 HE'S A DOCTOR. 252 00:08:20,399 --> 00:08:22,401 I MET HIM THE SAME DAY I CAME TO VISIT YOU IN THE HOSPITAL. 253 00:08:22,435 --> 00:08:23,536 ISN'T THAT FUNNY? 254 00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:25,137 [ LAUGHS ] 255 00:08:25,172 --> 00:08:26,540 SUPER-FUNNY. 256 00:08:26,574 --> 00:08:28,440 SO, WAIT. WHAT DID YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME ABOUT? 257 00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:30,744 OHHH... 258 00:08:30,778 --> 00:08:33,080 JUST THAT THIS LITTLE HECK-RAISER 259 00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:35,481 NEEDS TO TAKE A NAP, BUT HE'S BEEN FIGHTING IT. 260 00:08:35,514 --> 00:08:38,586 OH, I'VE GOT AN IDEA. LUKE HAD THE SAME PROBLEM. 261 00:08:38,619 --> 00:08:40,988 [ YAWNS ] I'MTIRED. 262 00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,422 LET'S GO TO BED. 263 00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:44,256 BOTH OF US? MM. 264 00:08:44,290 --> 00:08:45,725 TOGETHER? ME TOO? 265 00:08:45,759 --> 00:08:49,562 YES, BECAUSE WE ARE SLEEPY AND IT'S NAP TIME! 266 00:08:49,596 --> 00:08:51,731 NOW WAIT. HE'LL CLIMB IN BED WITH US. 267 00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:54,201 JUST GIVE HIM A MINUTE. 268 00:08:54,234 --> 00:08:55,602 OKAY. 269 00:08:55,635 --> 00:08:57,571 SINCE WE'RE JUST LYING HERE... 270 00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:59,272 MM-HMM. ...DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN YOU -- 271 00:08:59,306 --> 00:09:00,941 Will: [ Chuckling ] SORRY ABOUT THAT. 272 00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:02,542 OH! GOSH! OH, GOSH. 273 00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:04,043 YOU'RE GONE FOR TWO MINUTES, 274 00:09:04,076 --> 00:09:05,712 YOU COME BACK AND FIND US IN THE BIG-BOY BED. 275 00:09:05,745 --> 00:09:07,279 I CAN ONLY IMAGINE WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. 276 00:09:07,313 --> 00:09:09,750 THAT YOU'RE TRYING TO GET THIS LITTLE KID TO TAKE A NAP? 277 00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:12,119 HOW SMART IS HE? [ CHUCKLES ] 278 00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:13,586 SAY SOMETHING MEDICAL. 279 00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:14,553 20cc -- STAT. 280 00:09:14,587 --> 00:09:16,123 [ SIGHS ] 281 00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:18,424 I DON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD, BUT IT GETS ME GOING. 282 00:09:18,457 --> 00:09:20,727 [ LAUGHS ] 283 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,230 I MEAN, WHAT KIND OF STORE POLICY IS THAT? 284 00:09:23,263 --> 00:09:25,966 I-I CAN'T RETURN A COAT THAT I PUT ON ONE TIME AT HOME? 285 00:09:25,999 --> 00:09:27,735 GETTING OUT OF THE SHOWER. 286 00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:29,302 YEAH, YOU DIDN'T HELP BY POINTING THAT OUT. 287 00:09:29,336 --> 00:09:30,903 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TELL DADDY? 288 00:09:30,937 --> 00:09:32,806 WELL, I GUESS I'M JUST GONNA TELL HIM I MADE A MISTAKE. 289 00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:34,106 YOU KNOW, LIKE I SAY, SWEETIE, 290 00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:36,976 HONESTY IS ALWAYS THE BEST POLICY. 291 00:09:37,009 --> 00:09:38,445 UNLESS... 292 00:09:38,477 --> 00:09:41,313 AND STAY WITH ME HERE... WHERE WOULD I GO? 293 00:09:41,347 --> 00:09:43,283 ...I CONVINCE YOUR DADDY TO WAIT ON THE APARTMENT UPSTAIRS 294 00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,552 UNTIL I HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO SELL YOUR COAT, 295 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,221 AND, IF NEED BE, EVEN SELL MINE. 296 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:52,659 THANKS FOR SELLING MINE FIRST, DR. CHICAGO. 297 00:09:52,692 --> 00:09:54,326 IF I'M READING THIS PROPERLY, 298 00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:56,328 I'M SUPPOSED TO PUT A LIME IN YOUR MOUTH, 299 00:09:56,363 --> 00:09:57,730 SALT ON YOUR STOMACH, 300 00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,832 AND DRINK IT OUT OF YOUR BELLYBUTTON. 301 00:09:59,866 --> 00:10:01,033 [ CORK POPS ] YOU WISH. 302 00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:06,206 [ EXHALES SHARPLY ] THAT'LL GET YOU THERE. 303 00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:10,509 [ Coughing ] OH. WHOA, NELLY. 304 00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:11,912 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 305 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,081 HEY, PACE YOURSELF! THIS STUFF IS STRONG. 306 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:15,948 I'LL KNOW WHEN I'VE HAD ENOUGH. 307 00:10:15,982 --> 00:10:17,918 OH, HEY. I GOT IT LIT. 308 00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,820 I COULD FEEL IT INSIDE THE HOUSE. 309 00:10:19,852 --> 00:10:21,187 THEY'RE GONNA NEED DENTAL RECORDS 310 00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:22,489 TO IDENTIFY THOSE CHICKENS. 311 00:10:22,522 --> 00:10:23,756 YOU'LL BE SINGING A DIFFERENT TUNE 312 00:10:23,791 --> 00:10:25,658 ONCE I POP ON THE ROTISSERIE FEATURE. 313 00:10:25,692 --> 00:10:29,395 GET READY FOR THESE BIRDS AND YOUR HEAD TO SPIN. 314 00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:32,131 THAT'S MOVING PRETTY FAST. 315 00:10:32,164 --> 00:10:33,466 SIMPLE ADJUSTMENT. 316 00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:35,201 OH. THAT SEEMS TO HAVE... SPED IT UP. 317 00:10:35,235 --> 00:10:38,004 H-HOW ABOUT YOU SKIM DINNER OUT OF MY POOL? 318 00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:39,673 I'LL GET MY OLD GRILL OUT. 319 00:10:39,706 --> 00:10:41,341 WHY IS THIS EVEN A SETTING?! 320 00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:42,809 OH, HEY! 321 00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:44,476 HEY, WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GO, YOU COWARD? 322 00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:46,178 OH, WHAT -- JUST 'CAUSE DAD TOOK YOUR MONEY BACK, 323 00:10:46,212 --> 00:10:47,681 I'M SUPPOSED TO GIVE HIM ALL MINE, TOO? 324 00:10:47,715 --> 00:10:49,649 YES, YES. BECAUSE IT WAS YOUR STUPID IDEA. OKAY? 325 00:10:49,682 --> 00:10:52,519 OH, MY GOD. HOW AM I GONNA TELL CAM I GAVE AWAY HIS ENTIRE INHERITANCE? 326 00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:54,120 I DON'T KNOW. 327 00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:56,489 OH, HEY! IS THERE A FUTURE DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE? 328 00:10:56,523 --> 00:10:58,290 YEAH, I THINK HE'S UPSTAIRS, FEELING UP HALEY. 329 00:10:58,325 --> 00:11:01,028 NO -- YOU, ALEX EINSTEIN. 330 00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:03,330 WHATEVER YOU'RE DOING, PLEASE STOP. 331 00:11:03,363 --> 00:11:05,197 SHE'S STILL MAD. YEAH, SO AM I. 332 00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:07,033 IT'S NOT FAIR, OKAY? 333 00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:09,168 DAD GAVE YOU THE SAME AMOUNT OF MONEY FOR YOUR DOWN PAYMENT. 334 00:11:09,201 --> 00:11:11,705 WHAT? JAY LOANED US THAT MONEY? 335 00:11:11,739 --> 00:11:13,240 OH, MY GOD. YOU DON'T KNOW. YES. YES. 336 00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:15,307 MAKES YOU WONDER WHAT ELSE SHE'S LIED ABOUT, HUH? 337 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:16,844 WAIT -- I'VE OWED JAY MONEY FOR 20 YEARS, 338 00:11:16,876 --> 00:11:18,177 AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME? 339 00:11:18,211 --> 00:11:19,578 I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D WANT TO TAKE IT. 340 00:11:19,611 --> 00:11:21,081 I FINALLY UNDERSTAND THE INVISIBLE WALL 341 00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:22,850 THAT'S BEEN BETWEEN JAY AND ME ALL THIS TIME. 342 00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:25,052 THIS IS WHY WE'RE NOT LAUGHING ABOUT THAT CRAZY GRILL, 343 00:11:25,085 --> 00:11:26,986 TAKING AN AWESOME SELFIE WITH IT, 344 00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:28,388 POSTING IT ON INSTAGRAM, 345 00:11:28,421 --> 00:11:30,057 SENDING HILARIOUS E-MAILS BACK AND FORTH! 346 00:11:30,090 --> 00:11:31,258 "REMEMBER WHEN THE GRILL WENT NUTS?" 347 00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:32,692 "OH, YEAH. THAT WAS HILARIOUS." 348 00:11:32,725 --> 00:11:34,193 "YOU'RE HILARIOUS." [ CHUCKLES ] 349 00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:35,195 SO WHAT, HE'S A DOCTOR? 350 00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:36,229 I COULD BE A DOCTOR. 351 00:11:36,263 --> 00:11:37,596 I STILL HAVE THE WHITE COAT 352 00:11:37,629 --> 00:11:39,499 FROM WHEN I WORKED AT THE CLINIQUE COUNTER. 353 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,735 HEY. SO, GLORIA SAYS IT'S JOE'S BATH TIME. 354 00:11:41,769 --> 00:11:44,037 HE JUST HAD ONE. WHAT'S WITH THE ROBE, HEF? 355 00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:46,239 I DON'T KNOW WHO THAT IS, BUT I TOOK OFF MY SHIRT 356 00:11:46,273 --> 00:11:48,174 TO PROTECT IT FROM SPLASH GORDON OVER HERE. 357 00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:49,576 [ CHUCKLES ] ADORBS. 358 00:11:49,609 --> 00:11:51,110 CAN YOU GRAB ME THAT JUICE BOX? 359 00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:53,245 YEAH, SURE. 360 00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:55,215 ANYWAY... 361 00:11:55,248 --> 00:11:57,049 LIKE I WAS SAYING BEFORE, 362 00:11:57,084 --> 00:11:59,385 REMEMBER HOW, WHEN I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL -- 363 00:11:59,418 --> 00:12:00,552 OH, NO! 364 00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:02,688 OH, MAN, THIS IS GONNA STAIN! 365 00:12:02,721 --> 00:12:04,291 I NEED TO TAKE IT OFF AND SOAK IT. 366 00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:05,793 UH, UH... 367 00:12:05,826 --> 00:12:07,259 YOU COULD PUT ON MY SHIRT. IT'S HANGING RIGHT THERE. 368 00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:08,828 OH, THANKS. 369 00:12:10,798 --> 00:12:13,466 IT'S A LITTLE BOXY. DO YOU HAVE A CHUNKY BELT? 370 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,134 UH...YEAH, I GUESS. 371 00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:17,370 [ Chuckling ] I'M KIDDING. 372 00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,605 IT'S NOT LIKE I'M GONNA BE WEARING THIS FOR LONG ANYWAYS. 373 00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:21,307 WOW. THIS LOOKS BAD. 374 00:12:21,341 --> 00:12:22,741 AND THIS LOOKS EVEN WORSE. 375 00:12:22,775 --> 00:12:24,912 BUT THERE'S A PERFECTLY GOOD EXPLANATION. 376 00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:27,114 HEY, BABE. YOU SPILL SOMETHING ON YOUR DRESS? 377 00:12:27,147 --> 00:12:28,816 REALLY? THAT WAS YOUR FIRST GUESS? 378 00:12:28,849 --> 00:12:30,783 YEAH, I WAS GIVING ANDY A JUICE BOX. 379 00:12:30,817 --> 00:12:32,751 MM. NOT TO DRINK -- BECAUSE I'M A MAN. 380 00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:34,153 OKAY, SO, I'M GONNA GO GET A DRESS 381 00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:35,621 AND SOME SHOES FROM GLORIA'S CLOSET. 382 00:12:35,654 --> 00:12:36,789 WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR SHOES? 383 00:12:36,823 --> 00:12:37,857 NOTHING. 384 00:12:40,159 --> 00:12:41,427 OKAY. 385 00:12:41,461 --> 00:12:43,096 I'VE BEEN WATCHING THE TWO OF YOU, 386 00:12:43,129 --> 00:12:44,831 AND IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS. 387 00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:46,066 FINALLY. 388 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,734 YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE HER LAUGH. 389 00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,269 ANYWAY, I GOT HALEY A LITTLE GIFT, 390 00:12:49,302 --> 00:12:50,803 AND I WANT TO WRITE SOMETHING CUTE ON THE CARD. 391 00:12:50,837 --> 00:12:52,404 I THOUGHT YOU COULD HELP ME, BECAUSE -- 392 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:54,673 BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT GOOD WITH WORDS. 393 00:12:54,706 --> 00:12:55,975 WELL, I'M A DOCTOR. 394 00:12:56,009 --> 00:12:57,677 I CAN'T ADMIT I'M NOT GOOD AT SOMETHING. 395 00:12:57,710 --> 00:12:59,111 BUT...PLEASE? 396 00:12:59,145 --> 00:13:00,246 YEAH. 397 00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:01,347 FINE. 398 00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:03,350 [ SIGHS ] 399 00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:05,985 JUST... WRITE HOW YOU FEEL. 400 00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:08,087 SOMETHING LIKE... 401 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,823 "DEAR HALEY, I KNOW HOW EYES WORK, 402 00:13:10,857 --> 00:13:14,193 BUT I NEVER KNEW HOW THEY SPARKLED UNTIL I --" 403 00:13:14,226 --> 00:13:15,928 THAT COULD BE MACULAR DEGENERATION. 404 00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:17,496 JUST WRITE. 405 00:13:17,529 --> 00:13:18,597 [ LAUGHS ] 406 00:13:18,630 --> 00:13:20,533 WE NEED TO SOBER UP. 407 00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:23,436 RIGHT AFTER I CALL AN EX-GIRLFRIEND. 408 00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:25,371 [ Voice breaking ] I THINK I STILL LOVE HER. 409 00:13:25,404 --> 00:13:27,039 HEY. SORRY WE'RE LATE. 410 00:13:27,073 --> 00:13:28,441 HEY. NO, THAT'S FINE. NO WORRIES. 411 00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,009 UM, SO, LISTEN, MY STUPID SISTER -- 412 00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:31,845 LOOK, I DON'T WANT THAT APARTMENT ANYMORE. 413 00:13:31,879 --> 00:13:33,212 OH, ME NEITHER. YEAH, IT'S JUST THAT -- 414 00:13:33,245 --> 00:13:34,647 WELL, I THOUGHT YOU HAD YOUR HEART SET ON IT. 415 00:13:34,681 --> 00:13:36,448 I DID, BUT THEN YOU MADE SUCH A COMPELLING CASE. 416 00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:38,518 HEY, MITCH, I GOT TO TELL YOU, I WAS REALLY IMPRESSED 417 00:13:38,551 --> 00:13:40,120 WITH YOU PAYING BACK THAT LOAN. 418 00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:41,653 I'M SORRY. WHAT? EXCUSE ME? 419 00:13:41,687 --> 00:13:43,355 I'M SORRY. I SHOULD BE THANKING YOU, TOO. 420 00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:45,392 I FORGOT ABOUT THAT DOWN PAYMENT I HELPED YOU GUYS WITH. 421 00:13:45,424 --> 00:13:46,625 IT WAS SO LONG AGO. 422 00:13:46,658 --> 00:13:47,826 ANYWAY, YEAH. 423 00:13:47,860 --> 00:13:49,729 NICE BIRTHDAY SURPRISE. YEAH. 424 00:13:49,761 --> 00:13:51,563 YOU GAVE HIM MY MONEY, DIDN'T YOU? 425 00:13:51,597 --> 00:13:52,865 YOUR MONEY? I THOUGHT YOU SAID IT WAS OUR MONEY. 426 00:13:52,899 --> 00:13:54,167 WHY WOULD IT BE OUR MONEY? 427 00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:55,368 YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW MY UNCLE REMUS. 428 00:13:55,402 --> 00:13:56,702 WASN'T IT CYRUS? 429 00:13:56,735 --> 00:13:58,071 I THINK I WOULD KNOW THE NAME OF THE SAINT 430 00:13:58,105 --> 00:13:59,206 THAT PRACTICALLY RAISED ME. 431 00:13:59,239 --> 00:14:00,673 HMM. 432 00:14:00,706 --> 00:14:02,375 I FORGOT TO GIVE GRANDPA HIS BIRTHDAY CROWN. 433 00:14:02,408 --> 00:14:03,743 WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT'S THIS? 434 00:14:03,775 --> 00:14:05,812 UH... DOES LILY HAVE A FUR? 435 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:06,812 OH, BOY. 436 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:07,880 YEAH, UH, LET'S SEE. 437 00:14:07,914 --> 00:14:09,416 OH, IT'S FROM SCHWARTZMAN'S, HUH? 438 00:14:09,448 --> 00:14:10,984 THE SAME STORE THAT YOU AND LILY 439 00:14:11,018 --> 00:14:13,019 JUST LOVE TO BROWSE IN EVERY SUNDAY AFTER BRUNCH. 440 00:14:13,052 --> 00:14:16,588 WELL, IF YOU MUST KNOW, IT WAS A SURPRISE GIFT FOR YOU. 441 00:14:16,623 --> 00:14:18,758 NOW IT'S GOING BACK, BECAUSE YOU'RE A THIEF. 442 00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:20,226 OH, WELL, THEN, I WANT TO TRY IT ON. NO! 443 00:14:20,259 --> 00:14:21,693 I WANT TO TRY IT ON. YOU'LL JUST GET ATTACHED. 444 00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:23,230 WELL, IT'S A PRESENT FOR ME, SO I SHOULD BE ABLE 445 00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:25,331 TO HAVE A FITTING OF SOME SORT. 446 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:26,732 OF COURSE IT NEEDS ALTERING. 447 00:14:26,765 --> 00:14:28,467 SINCE WHEN DO YOU WEAR RIGHT OFF THE RACK? 448 00:14:30,736 --> 00:14:32,438 [ CLEARS THROAT ] OH. 449 00:14:32,471 --> 00:14:35,341 I'M JUST NOT COMFORTABLE WITH VESUVIUS OVER THERE. 450 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:36,875 I HOPE YOU CAN GET YOUR MONEY BACK. 451 00:14:36,909 --> 00:14:38,544 "MONEY BACK" -- THERE IT IS. 452 00:14:38,577 --> 00:14:40,346 HUH? THERE'S A SHADOW THAT'S BEEN CAST 453 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,282 OVER THIS RELATIONSHIP FOR QUITE A WHILE NOW. 454 00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:44,017 IS THIS ABOUT THAT TIME YOU WERE SLEEPWALKING 455 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,019 AND CAME IN MY TENT AND KISSED MY NECK? 456 00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:48,956 SOMNAMOROUSNESS -- THE CONDITION NO ONE WANTS TO TALK ABOUT. 457 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:50,356 YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT THAT. 458 00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:51,924 THIS IS ACTUALLY MUCH MORE EMBARRASSING. 459 00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:55,195 I JUST FOUND OUT YOU LENT US MONEY FOR OUR DOWN PAYMENT. 460 00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:56,263 SO... 461 00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:57,297 HERE. 462 00:14:57,330 --> 00:14:59,698 PAID BACK IN FULL. 463 00:14:59,731 --> 00:15:01,600 PHIL, IS THIS BECAUSE MITCHELL -- 464 00:15:01,634 --> 00:15:03,802 NO. THIS IS FOR ME -- FOR US. 465 00:15:03,836 --> 00:15:07,106 AND THOUGH IT MAY BE LONG OVERDUE, THANK YOU. 466 00:15:07,139 --> 00:15:08,674 YOU'RE WELCOME. 467 00:15:10,943 --> 00:15:12,745 PROBABLY SEEMS AWKWARD, BUT... 468 00:15:12,778 --> 00:15:13,947 IT'S HAPPENING. 469 00:15:13,980 --> 00:15:15,914 ...COULD YOU THROW THAT APRON ON ME? 470 00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:18,985 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 471 00:15:22,455 --> 00:15:23,822 YOU'RE NOT SLEEPING AGAIN? OH. 472 00:15:30,029 --> 00:15:31,831 MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE ANOTHER POT OF COFFEE. 473 00:15:31,864 --> 00:15:32,932 [ CHUCKLES ] THAT'S A WEIRD WORD, HUH? COFFEE. COFFEE. COFFEE. 474 00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:34,167 [ SIGHS ] AMATEUR. 475 00:15:34,201 --> 00:15:36,003 Gloria: DOCTOR! I NEED YOUR HELP. 476 00:15:36,036 --> 00:15:39,239 I'VE BEEN DRINKING THIS TEQUILA, AND I CANNOT FIND THE WORM. 477 00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,407 I THINK I JUST SWALLOW IT. 478 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,075 THAT'S VERY SERIOUS. 479 00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:44,344 THAT WORM COULD EAT YOUR INSIDES IN A MATTER OF HOURS. 480 00:15:44,376 --> 00:15:46,113 WELL, THERE MUST BE SOMETHING SHE CAN DO. 481 00:15:46,145 --> 00:15:47,480 DRINK PICKLE JUICE. 482 00:15:47,514 --> 00:15:49,481 THE WORM CANNOT SURVIVE IN PICKLE JUICE. 483 00:15:49,515 --> 00:15:51,217 IS THIS ENOUGH? JUST. 484 00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:54,520 AHH! THANK YOU, DOCTOR. I'M FEELING BETTER ALREADY. 485 00:15:54,553 --> 00:15:56,423 YOU GOT LUCKY. 486 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,591 THE ONLY OTHER TREATMENT IS TO FREEZE THE WORM TO DEATH 487 00:15:58,625 --> 00:16:02,195 BY LOWERING THE BODY TEMPERATURE WITH AN ICE BATH. 488 00:16:02,229 --> 00:16:03,863 I FEEL IT INSIDE OF ME. 489 00:16:03,895 --> 00:16:05,865 NO. I THINK IT'S INSIDE OF ME. 490 00:16:05,898 --> 00:16:08,634 I KNEW WE SHOULD'VE POURED THE TEQUILA IN YOUR BELLYBUTTON. 491 00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:10,669 THAT'S WHY THEY HAVE THESE SYSTEMS IN PLACE. 492 00:16:12,971 --> 00:16:14,474 WHOA! 493 00:16:14,506 --> 00:16:16,043 I HEARD AN EXPENSIVE CAR PULL OUT. 494 00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,509 I FIGURED YOU WERE IN IT. 495 00:16:17,543 --> 00:16:19,479 OH, YEAH, THAT WAS WILL GOING TO THE HOSPITAL. 496 00:16:19,511 --> 00:16:21,313 I JUST CAME TO GET MY DRESS. 497 00:16:21,347 --> 00:16:24,951 OH. UM, HE GAVE ME THIS CARD, BUT HE WRITES LIKE A DOCTOR. 498 00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,352 CAN YOU READ IT FOR ME? 499 00:16:26,385 --> 00:16:29,956 MNH-MNH. NO. THAT SOUNDS WAY TOO PERSONAL. 500 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:32,491 OHH, COME ON! I VISITED YOU IN THE HOSPITAL. 501 00:16:32,524 --> 00:16:34,894 JUST DO IT! NAH, I'M OKAY. 502 00:16:34,927 --> 00:16:36,562 CAN YOU JUST SEE IF YOU CAN READ IT? I CAN'T. 503 00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:38,331 I'D RATHER NOT. CAN YOU EVEN READ? CAN YOU PLEASE TRY? 504 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:39,466 I'LL TRY. YEAH, NO, I'LL TRY. 505 00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:40,667 THANK YOU. YOU'RE WELCOME. 506 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:44,636 "DEAR HALEY, I KNOW HOW EYES WORK, 507 00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:46,905 BUT I NEVER KNEW HOW THEY SPARKLED 508 00:16:46,938 --> 00:16:48,807 UNTIL I MET YOU. 509 00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,243 I KNOW HOW HEARTS WORK, 510 00:16:50,277 --> 00:16:52,211 BUT I NEVER KNEW THEY COULD SING 511 00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:54,181 UNTIL I MET YOU. 512 00:16:54,213 --> 00:16:56,316 LOVE, WILL." 513 00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:58,284 [ Sighing ] OH, CRAP. 514 00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:01,687 REALLY? I THOUGHT IT WAS KIND OF SWEET. 515 00:17:01,721 --> 00:17:03,755 THE DOCTOR PART, THEN IT CIRCLED AROUND BACK TO YOU. 516 00:17:03,789 --> 00:17:05,892 WHY DOES HE HAVE TO BE SO INTO ME, YOU KNOW? 517 00:17:05,924 --> 00:17:07,160 WE MET LIKE TWO WEEKS AGO. 518 00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,662 A GOLD HEART! REALLY? 519 00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:12,231 I JUST -- I GUESS I'M JUST MORE INTO THE CHASE RIGHT NOW. 520 00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:13,932 YOU KNOW, LIKE, THE FUN. 521 00:17:13,965 --> 00:17:16,103 I'M JUST NOT LOOKING FOR ANYTHING SERIOUS. 522 00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:20,038 WELL, IT'S GOOD YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT -- 523 00:17:20,073 --> 00:17:21,673 BEFORE ANYONE GOT HURT. 524 00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:22,942 YEAH. 525 00:17:22,974 --> 00:17:24,144 THANKS. 526 00:17:29,548 --> 00:17:30,782 OF COURSE I HAVE THE RECEIPT. 527 00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:32,684 OW!...KAY, WHAT IF I DIDN'T? 528 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:34,019 OH, THERE SHE IS! 529 00:17:34,052 --> 00:17:35,954 OKAY, EVERYBODY, I WANT TO MAKE A TOAST! 530 00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:37,124 OH, ANY EXCUSE. 531 00:17:37,156 --> 00:17:39,425 TO MY BRILLIANT DAUGHTER... 532 00:17:39,459 --> 00:17:40,960 SO, NOT YOU. 533 00:17:40,992 --> 00:17:43,930 ...WHO WORKED FOR 12 YEARS TO GET INTO CALTECH, 534 00:17:43,962 --> 00:17:46,065 THE MOST PRESTIGIOUS COLLEGE -- 535 00:17:46,098 --> 00:17:47,700 MOM, IT'S REALLY NOT A BIG DEAL. 536 00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:49,469 OH, HONEY, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT -- YOU SAID YOURSELF 537 00:17:49,501 --> 00:17:52,305 IT'S THE BEST SCIENTIST SCHOOL IN THE COUNTRY. 538 00:17:52,338 --> 00:17:54,707 WELL, I MOST DEFINITELY DID NOT USE THOSE WORDS. 539 00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:56,041 CONGRATULATIONS, ALEX. 540 00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:57,777 WE EXPECT GREAT THINGS FROM YOU -- 541 00:17:57,809 --> 00:18:00,646 UNLIKE SOME OF THE OTHER CHILDREN IN THIS FAMILY. 542 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,048 WELL, I SNAGGED A DOCTOR, 543 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:04,151 SO SHE MUST BE TALKING ABOUT YOU. 544 00:18:04,183 --> 00:18:05,617 MM. I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU. 545 00:18:05,652 --> 00:18:06,952 MWAH, MWAH, MWAH! 546 00:18:06,986 --> 00:18:08,887 OKAY, WELL, I HAVEN'T EVEN DECIDED. 547 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,623 I STILL MIGHT GO TO MY SAFETY SCHOOL. 548 00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:12,392 GREAT. NOW THIS. 549 00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:14,093 IF SHE GOES TO THE OTHER PLACE, IT'S EVEN MORE EXPENSIVE. 550 00:18:14,126 --> 00:18:15,994 IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. PLEASE. 551 00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:17,663 SHE'S JUST TRYING TO PUNISH ME. 552 00:18:17,696 --> 00:18:19,598 AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE MONEY. I GOT MY BONUS. 553 00:18:19,632 --> 00:18:20,866 YEAH. 554 00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:23,336 WAIT. WHAT? WHAT DID YOU DO? 555 00:18:23,369 --> 00:18:24,770 DID YOU PAY BACK MY DAD? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. 556 00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:26,272 NO, NO, NO. YES, I DID. 557 00:18:26,306 --> 00:18:27,807 [ GASPS ] NOT THAT IT CHANGED ANYTHING. 558 00:18:27,839 --> 00:18:29,241 OKAY, DON'T BE MAD AT PHIL. 559 00:18:29,276 --> 00:18:30,942 HE'S NOT THE BAD GUY HERE. HE IS. 560 00:18:30,977 --> 00:18:33,480 LOOK AT HIM, SITTING OVER THERE LIKE HE'S THE KING OF THE WORLD. 561 00:18:33,512 --> 00:18:35,315 WHAT FATHER TAKES MONEY FROM HIS OWN CHILDREN? 562 00:18:35,347 --> 00:18:37,183 NOT LIKE HE NEEDS IT. HE LIVES IN THIS PALACE. 563 00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:38,684 MEANWHILE, OUR WHOLE FAMILY'S 564 00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:40,353 SHARING A BATHROOM THE SIZE OF HIS CLOSET. 565 00:18:40,386 --> 00:18:41,488 I KNOW. I'VE PACED IT OUT. 566 00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,088 OKAY, WHAT ABOUT ME? 567 00:18:43,122 --> 00:18:44,957 MY TEARS HAVE BARELY DRIED, HE STOLE MY INHERITANCE, 568 00:18:44,990 --> 00:18:46,692 AND I'M LEFT HOLDING THE BAG FOR TWO FUR COATS. 569 00:18:46,726 --> 00:18:47,993 T-TWO?! 570 00:18:48,027 --> 00:18:49,662 I CAN GET THREE SEASONS OF USE OUT OF IT. 571 00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:51,663 [ Chuckling ] HEY, THIS MIGHT GIVE YOU A CHUCKLE. 572 00:18:51,698 --> 00:18:53,200 THAT MONEY YOU ALL PAID ME BACK -- 573 00:18:53,232 --> 00:18:55,634 IT'S GONNA COVER THE COST OF THAT T-BIRD. AH! 574 00:18:55,667 --> 00:18:57,836 ISN'T THAT FUNNY HOW STUFF WORKS OUT? [ LAUGHTER ] 575 00:18:57,869 --> 00:18:59,338 IT SURE IS FUNNY. THAT'S HILARIOUS. 576 00:18:59,372 --> 00:19:00,772 [ GASPS ] OHH! 577 00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:02,608 I CAN'T. IT'S TOO COLD. 578 00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:05,678 IT'S EITHER COLD FOR 5 MINUTES OR COLD FOREVER. 579 00:19:05,711 --> 00:19:06,679 [ SHUDDERS ] 580 00:19:06,712 --> 00:19:07,880 COME ON. 581 00:19:07,913 --> 00:19:10,349 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 582 00:19:10,383 --> 00:19:12,050 [ BOTH GASPING ] 583 00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:14,987 FUNNY -- I ALWAYS THOUGHT I'D BE FOUND DEAD IN A BIRD SUIT 584 00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:16,855 AT THE BOTTOM OF THE GRAND CANYON. 585 00:19:16,888 --> 00:19:18,391 YOU STILL WILL, BUDDY. 586 00:19:18,424 --> 00:19:20,125 [ Voice breaking ] YOU STILL WILL. 587 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:21,693 [ CAMERA CLICKS ] 588 00:19:21,728 --> 00:19:23,563 IF I EVER CATCH YOU DRINKING AGAIN, 589 00:19:23,596 --> 00:19:26,097 YOUR WHOLE SCHOOL IS GOING TO SEE THIS PICTURE. 590 00:19:27,366 --> 00:19:28,835 SH-SH-SHE TRICKED US. 591 00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:30,403 I KNOW. 592 00:19:30,436 --> 00:19:33,072 AS SOON AS WE KILL THIS WORM, WE'RE GONNA GET HER BACK. 593 00:19:34,073 --> 00:19:35,942 THERE'S...NO...WORM! 594 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:40,078 NOT GONNA HELP, KID. 595 00:19:40,112 --> 00:19:41,381 YOU'RE RIGHT. 596 00:19:41,413 --> 00:19:43,182 I CAN'T DROWN MY PROBLEMS IN ALCOHOL. 597 00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:45,617 WELL, YOU CAN, BUT THAT'S WATER. 598 00:19:47,220 --> 00:19:48,921 YOU'RE NOT REALLY GONNA TURN DOWN CALTECH? 599 00:19:48,954 --> 00:19:50,823 OH, PLEASE DON'T TELL ME WHAT A GREAT SCHOOL IT IS, 600 00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:52,191 HOW I'M GONNA GRADUATE IN TWO YEARS, 601 00:19:52,224 --> 00:19:53,726 AND THEY'RE GONNA NAME A COUNTRY AFTER ME. 602 00:19:53,759 --> 00:19:55,228 YOU'RE FEELING SOME PRESSURE. 603 00:19:55,261 --> 00:19:57,063 WHAT IF I'M THE DUMBEST ONE THERE? 604 00:19:57,096 --> 00:19:58,698 SOMEONE HAS TO BE. 605 00:19:58,730 --> 00:20:00,532 I COULD GET THERE, BE DUMB, HAVE A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN -- 606 00:20:00,567 --> 00:20:02,835 HEY. YOU'RE GOING. I KNOW YOU. 607 00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:05,271 YOU'VE NEVER BACKED DOWN FROM A CHALLENGE YOUR WHOLE LIFE. 608 00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:07,839 NOW, I COULD LIE TO YOU AND TELL YOU IT'S GONNA BE EASY. 609 00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:09,842 WELL, DO THAT. I'M VULNERABLE. I'LL BELIEVE YOU. 610 00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:11,611 IT'S NOT. IT'S GONNA BE HARD. 611 00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:14,314 BUT YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THIS IS SOMETHING YOU HAVE TO DO. 612 00:20:15,781 --> 00:20:17,616 'CAUSE IF I DON'T, I'LL REGRET IT MY WHOLE LIFE. 613 00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:18,585 I KNOW, I KNOW. 614 00:20:18,617 --> 00:20:20,185 YEAH, THAT'S PART OF IT. 615 00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:22,087 LET'S TAKE A RIDE. WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. 616 00:20:22,121 --> 00:20:24,089 YOU'RE NOT GONNA DRIVE ME INTO A BAD NEIGHBORHOOD 617 00:20:24,123 --> 00:20:25,592 TO SHOW ME HOW LUCKY I AM, ARE YOU? 618 00:20:25,625 --> 00:20:27,259 Shh. 619 00:20:29,127 --> 00:20:30,529 WELL, I WOULD STILL HAVE MY MONEY 620 00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:32,131 IF SH HADN'T TRICKED MITCHELL. 621 00:20:32,163 --> 00:20:33,932 OH, AND IT'S A SHAME YOU DON'T, CAM. 622 00:20:33,965 --> 00:20:36,134 'CAUSE THEN YOU COULD BUY ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE COATS. 623 00:20:36,167 --> 00:20:37,869 Phil: WELL, I DIDN'T GET ANYTHING I WANTED! 624 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,638 JAY DIDN'T EVEN LIKE THE WORLD'S MOST PERFECT GRILL. 625 00:20:39,672 --> 00:20:40,740 [ EXPLOSION ] 626 00:20:40,772 --> 00:20:42,409 COME ON! 627 00:20:42,442 --> 00:20:45,311 THE FAMILY NEEDS A LEADER, AND I CAN'T DO IT FOREVER. 628 00:20:45,345 --> 00:20:47,145 YOU CAN HANDLE IT. 629 00:20:47,179 --> 00:20:48,914 DO I HAVE TO? 630 00:20:48,948 --> 00:20:50,682 HEAVY HANGS THE HEAD. 631 00:20:53,486 --> 00:20:57,123 YOU KNOW, COLLEGE MIGHT NOT BE SUCH A BIG, SCARY PLACE IF I DROVE UP THE FIRST -- 632 00:20:57,155 --> 00:20:58,325 NOT GONNA HAPPEN. OKAY. 633 00:21:04,297 --> 00:21:05,832 Your brother's in a bit of a spot money-wise, 634 00:21:05,865 --> 00:21:07,299 and I don't want to embarrass him, 635 00:21:07,334 --> 00:21:08,734 so how about if I say I'm giving you both a gift? 636 00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,636 That way, he doesn't feel like a charity case. 637 00:21:10,670 --> 00:21:12,739 Oh. Well, if it's to help Mitchell... 638 00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:14,473 Thank you, honey. 639 00:21:14,507 --> 00:21:17,108 [ Shuddering ] S-STILL S-SO COLD. 640 00:21:17,143 --> 00:21:19,111 M-MAYBE SOME COFFEE WOULD WARM US UP. 641 00:21:19,144 --> 00:21:21,079 YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. 642 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,615 So, listen, how about if I say I'm giving you both a gift? 643 00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:24,651 That way, your sister -- 644 00:21:24,683 --> 00:21:26,117 WE'LL TAKE IT. 645 00:21:26,152 --> 00:21:28,119 LILY! WE CAN GET THE HATS! 646 00:21:28,153 --> 00:21:29,788 YAY!