OK.
We've talked about cohesion and coherence.
Now let's talk about concise writing concise writing is a key skill for getting a really really high
score is not easy but if you want to know what a skilled how you know somebody is a skilled writer it's
because they're able to write concisely writing concisely means every word in the sentence counts.
Sometimes when I see student writing they have a lot of articles and and b verbs and helping verbs and
just a lot of just extra frivolous language and a create these super long sentences because they have
so many extra words like you can have a long sentence where every word counts OK.
And there's a difference between between between that between that type of writing and having just extra
words.
So here are some keys to eliminating eliminating are being able to be concise in terms of your writing.
So you want to be able to eliminate unnecessary determiner and modifiers.
So for example look here this example.
Any particular type of dessert is fine with me.
Right.
Look at the more concise version.
Any dessert is fine with me or I would look at these extra words.
Particular type of dessert any dessert any dessert is the same thing as saying particular type of dessert.
Now some of you might be saying well this the sentence is correct.
So what does it matter.
Well again concise writing is high level writing and we know this because when you look at a basic level
English student they have these types of sentences that are really long because they have just extra
words they don't they don't have the ability to say the same thing with less high level English writing
happens where you're able to say the same thing with less the same impact with less balancing balancing
the budget by Friday is an impossibility without some kind of extra help.
Again extra language extra language as some of you again you're going to say but there's nothing wrong
with it.
I'm trying to tell you the difference between a high score on the rubric and a lower score on the rubric
because lower level English students use that kind of writing some kind of
so here we are again another way to be able to be more concise change phrases into single words.
Look here the employee with ambition the ambitious employee the Department showing the best performance
the best the best performing department.
That kind of writing that concise writing where you're changing phrases into single words is the type
of writing that gets really high scores when a greater sees that they're like wow wow this person really
knows how to write very very well when they see a lot of those extra words it it doesn't really impress
them.
So something else you can do is change unnecessary change the unnecessary words that who which clauses
into phrases again the report which was recently released the recently released report.
All applicants who are interested in the job must all job applicants must right.
That is what when we talk about concise writing When We Talk About concise writing that's what we're
talking about.
That's what it means to write concisely.
So we also have to avoid overusing explicit explicit tips ex expletives.
I'm sorry.
Avoid overusing expletives at the beginning of a sentence.
So I see this one a lot.
It is the governor who signs or vetoes bills.
There are four rules that should be observed right.
The governor signs or vetoes bills for rules to be observed.
That is concise writing.
That is the kind of writing that will get you a really really high score
use the active voice rather than the passive voice.
An account was opened by Mrs. Sams.
Mrs. Sams opened an account when you're writing when you're writing 90 percent of your writing should
be in the active voice.
90 percent of your writing should be in the active voice.
When you write in the active voice you avoid being wordy.
There only are there only are specific situations where you use the passive voice.
So if you're just using the passive voice all over the whole essay or over the whole report and you
don't have the specific situation that calls for using the passive voice you're gonna get marked down
for that right.
Avoid overusing now forms of verbs.
The function of this department is the collection of accounts.
This Department collects accounts the core of focus of the medical profession is disease prevention.
The medical profession currently focuses on disease prevention.
Look at this.
Look at this last sentence I want you to.
I just want to point out to you extra words right out of the is extra words here in this sentence start
in this sentence at the bottom.
Every word is necessary every word is necessary.
That's what concise writing is.
Everything is necessary.
Everything is needed.
Too many times students write sentences that have language that is not needed.
All right so you have to also reword unnecessary or infinitive phrases reword unnecessary or infinitive
phrases some infinitive phrases can be converted into finite verbs or brief now phrases making such
changes often results in the replacement of a beaver with an action verb right.
So example the duty of a clerk is to check all incoming mail.
All incoming mail and to record it all clerk checks by a clerk checks and records all incoming mail.
That is a concise sentence right.
So a lot of times when I'm writing compounds into the complex sentences my sentences are longer but
my sentences Arkansas
all right.
Sometimes you want to combine sentences to avoid wording this exactly.
This is why I preach and preach and preach.
Having the ability to write compound in complex sentences because it cuts out so many war so many extra
words in this top sentence We have 22 words in this bottom sentence We have 17 words now some of you
may say well that's just five words.
Yes but it makes a difference.
Concise writing reads better.
The best writers write concisely.
This is what you have to do.
If you want a really really high score right.
So don't come and ask me something like Well can I be wordy and still get a really high score
you've got your your you really are making it a challenge to for a greater to give you a high score
if you are extremely wordy in your sentences because it's not impressive worthiness is not impressive
being concise is really really impressive.
So if you're asking me about getting a high score it's all about your ability to impress the greater
right.
So you had to also eliminate some common wordy expressions
avoid.
There is and there are constructions.
Cut them out.
Stop using them.
Stop using them all right.
If you want to write more concisely.
Stop using.
There he is and there are just stop because it sounds better when you don't use them.
It is better writing avoid using the first person right.
Wordy I think that George's wife is unhappy because George ignores her George's wife is unhappy because
George ignores her.
This is a proper sentence.
This is a high level sentence.
This first sentence is a basic level sentence.
I hope that you're seeing the difference between basic level writing and advanced level writing.
Right.
Sometimes people think well it's just about vocabulary.
No it's not is more about sentence structure right.
It's more about sentence structure.
So do you have any questions.
If you have any questions about concise writing let me know.
I'm going to include a couple of exercises and you should do those exercises to work on your to work
on your ability to do concise writing.
So thanks a lot and I will talk to you soon.