1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,800
So we have to repossess
your house and everything in it
2
00:00:02,880 --> 00:00:04,360
and that stick you're leaning on.
3
00:00:04,547 --> 00:00:06,267
It'll be hard to walk...
4
00:00:06,347 --> 00:00:08,947
Then lie down and drag
yourself along with your lips.
5
00:00:10,587 --> 00:00:12,267
Cashier number three, please.
6
00:00:12,347 --> 00:00:14,347
Today.
Help a Blameless Child?
7
00:00:14,427 --> 00:00:16,907
Thank you, sir, thank you very much.
8
00:00:24,307 --> 00:00:25,507
Lay off it.
9
00:00:32,467 --> 00:00:36,947
Put a smile on a kid's face.
10
00:00:37,027 --> 00:00:38,467
Help a blameless child.
11
00:00:40,627 --> 00:00:45,747
Right. Straight in, straight out.
No messing.
12
00:00:45,827 --> 00:00:49,267
And Twitch, watch that trigger
finger.
13
00:00:49,347 --> 00:00:51,747
Mr Macratty don't want no mistakes.
14
00:00:56,507 --> 00:00:58,587
Go! Go! Go! Go!
15
00:00:59,987 --> 00:01:01,827
Help a Blameless Child?
No change, mate.
16
00:01:01,907 --> 00:01:04,427
Help a Blameless...?
Woo!
17
00:01:04,507 --> 00:01:06,387
Go! Go! Go!
18
00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:08,907
Everybody get down on the floor!
19
00:01:08,987 --> 00:01:10,147
Now!
20
00:01:10,227 --> 00:01:12,687
Nobody moves, nobody gets hurt.
21
00:01:12,775 --> 00:01:13,975
Shut it.
22
00:01:14,055 --> 00:01:16,295
And you.
23
00:01:16,375 --> 00:01:19,215
Uh-uh. Eat it. I said eat it!
24
00:01:19,295 --> 00:01:22,375
That's right! We'll even
stand on the bloody counters!
25
00:01:22,455 --> 00:01:25,455
Any of you try and stop us,
you'll end up like these leaflets.
26
00:01:25,535 --> 00:01:26,815
Woo!
27
00:01:26,895 --> 00:01:29,295
Reckon you'll be telling
your grandkids about this, eh?
28
00:01:29,375 --> 00:01:30,415
I'm-I'm gay.
29
00:01:30,495 --> 00:01:32,935
Right. Well. You can
turn it into a musical
30
00:01:33,015 --> 00:01:35,215
Go on! Oi!
31
00:01:35,295 --> 00:01:36,775
Don't try and be a hero.
32
00:01:39,255 --> 00:01:41,855
Robber number one, please.
33
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,055
It's OK, I'm a cop.
34
00:01:44,135 --> 00:01:45,455
You're Todd Carty.
35
00:01:45,535 --> 00:01:46,575
And a cop.
36
00:01:46,655 --> 00:01:47,975
No-one said it'd be locked.
37
00:01:48,055 --> 00:01:50,095
Why's it locked? New guidelines.
38
00:01:50,175 --> 00:01:52,416
We have to lock the money up
so the notes don't blow away
39
00:01:52,495 --> 00:01:53,775
if there's a draught. Right...
40
00:01:53,855 --> 00:01:57,055
Get it open
or I'm going to do your knees.
41
00:01:57,135 --> 00:01:58,615
I haven't got a niece.
42
00:01:58,695 --> 00:02:00,335
Code! Now!
43
00:02:00,415 --> 00:02:04,775
Two, two, double two,
then two twos and two more twos.
44
00:02:04,855 --> 00:02:08,295
Double two again,
two, two, two, two...
45
00:02:08,375 --> 00:02:11,135
two, two, two, two and two.
46
00:02:12,535 --> 00:02:13,895
Go, go, go, go. Go.
47
00:02:13,975 --> 00:02:16,695
Woo!
48
00:02:16,775 --> 00:02:18,415
Who's whispering?
49
00:02:18,495 --> 00:02:19,615
Ahh...
50
00:02:19,695 --> 00:02:21,975
Hey are you talking to God?
51
00:02:22,055 --> 00:02:24,375
Do you want to talk to him
face to face?
52
00:02:24,455 --> 00:02:26,215
Does God even have a face?
53
00:02:26,295 --> 00:02:27,495
WELL, DOES HE?
54
00:02:27,575 --> 00:02:30,135
Not in any meaningful
anthropomorphic sense...
55
00:02:30,215 --> 00:02:32,055
I don't talk ponce-a-nese.
56
00:02:32,135 --> 00:02:35,295
Leave the ponce alone.
57
00:02:35,375 --> 00:02:36,335
Now drop it.
58
00:02:38,535 --> 00:02:40,215
You ain't got the guts.
59
00:02:40,295 --> 00:02:42,815
Maybe not, but I've got the balls.
60
00:02:42,895 --> 00:02:44,455
Two of them, big as mangoes.
61
00:02:44,535 --> 00:02:47,295
Each as warm and heavy
as a baby's head,
62
00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:48,975
with a similar covering of fine hair
63
00:02:49,055 --> 00:02:52,015
and tendency to wrinkle up
when I need feeding.
64
00:02:52,095 --> 00:02:53,935
Now put the gun down.
65
00:02:54,015 --> 00:02:55,255
No.
66
00:02:55,335 --> 00:02:57,095
Don't I know you from somewhere?
67
00:02:57,175 --> 00:02:58,455
That's rich, coming from you.
68
00:02:58,535 --> 00:03:00,215
You sound just like this
little scrote
69
00:03:00,295 --> 00:03:02,655
that used to cause trouble
on my patch.
70
00:03:02,735 --> 00:03:04,055
They called you Twitch.
71
00:03:05,095 --> 00:03:06,975
No, they never.
72
00:03:07,055 --> 00:03:09,015
What was your guvnor's name again?
Macreedy?
73
00:03:09,095 --> 00:03:10,655
Macratty.
74
00:03:10,735 --> 00:03:13,815
And that ain't his name, anyway.
Stop with the mind games!
75
00:03:13,895 --> 00:03:15,735
Macratty's not going to be
happy with you.
76
00:03:15,815 --> 00:03:17,135
Stay back.
77
00:03:17,215 --> 00:03:18,615
Or what?
78
00:03:18,695 --> 00:03:21,615
You'll shoot me?
Go ahead I don't care.
79
00:03:21,695 --> 00:03:25,655
I've got nothing to lose,
I'm crazy, you see? Loco.
80
00:03:25,735 --> 00:03:29,415
And don't even think about
taking her hostage.
81
00:03:29,495 --> 00:03:30,455
I hadn't.
82
00:03:30,535 --> 00:03:31,655
Good.
83
00:03:31,735 --> 00:03:33,055
Come here!
84
00:03:33,135 --> 00:03:36,655
Now you drop it, otherwise her kid's
gonna grow up a widow.
85
00:03:55,855 --> 00:03:58,135
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
86
00:03:58,215 --> 00:04:00,615
Come on!
87
00:04:00,695 --> 00:04:01,735
Woo!
88
00:04:01,815 --> 00:04:04,855
Go, go, go, go, go.
89
00:04:04,935 --> 00:04:07,495
Twitch you idiot,
what did I tell you?
90
00:04:07,575 --> 00:04:08,775
It was him or me. Get up.
91
00:04:08,855 --> 00:04:10,175
Come on.
92
00:04:10,255 --> 00:04:12,055
Out of the way.
93
00:04:12,135 --> 00:04:13,215
Go.
94
00:04:20,095 --> 00:04:22,215
They shot Todd Carty.
95
00:04:24,455 --> 00:04:26,375
Robber number five, please.
96
00:04:29,292 --> 00:04:55,205
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru.
97
00:05:05,855 --> 00:05:09,615
We're interrupting that
music for a Crimi-News update.
98
00:05:09,695 --> 00:05:13,255
We're hearing about an armed bank
robbery in the City of Town.
99
00:05:13,335 --> 00:05:14,895
There are reports of casualties
100
00:05:14,975 --> 00:05:17,575
but it's not yet clear how many
are dead,
101
00:05:17,655 --> 00:05:20,015
or which brilliant yet tortured
policeman
102
00:05:20,095 --> 00:05:22,935
might soon be on the tail
of the culprit.
103
00:05:23,015 --> 00:05:25,095
I don't play those games any more.
104
00:05:29,295 --> 00:05:32,495
Sorry, are we going to be sitting
here much longer...?
105
00:05:32,575 --> 00:05:35,135
It's just that my flight's at 2:30,
106
00:05:35,215 --> 00:05:37,495
and the airport's a fair distance,
so...
107
00:05:41,495 --> 00:05:42,495
Oh, great.
108
00:05:46,215 --> 00:05:50,055
When I become mayor, crimes like
this will be a thing of the past.
109
00:05:50,135 --> 00:05:52,815
Like Max Headroom.
Or the Renaissance.
110
00:05:52,895 --> 00:05:54,375
Aggressive armed robbery.
111
00:05:54,455 --> 00:05:57,935
Four armed men wearing stockings,
15 denier, back seam.
112
00:05:58,015 --> 00:06:01,455
Ј6.49 from department stores
and/or larger branches of Boots.
113
00:06:01,535 --> 00:06:02,815
Who's that on the steps?
114
00:06:02,895 --> 00:06:04,495
Mayoral candidate Hope Goodgirl.
115
00:06:04,575 --> 00:06:07,215
Centre-right, libertarian,
currently unmarried, feisty,
116
00:06:07,295 --> 00:06:09,695
blood group AB,
5,000 Twitter followers.
117
00:06:09,775 --> 00:06:11,335
Mobile number 077...
118
00:06:11,415 --> 00:06:12,935
Whoever she is, she's in our way.
119
00:06:13,015 --> 00:06:16,295
This is a crime scene. Now fold
up your typewriters and leave.
120
00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:19,975
Visible policing.
You're an inspiration.
121
00:06:20,055 --> 00:06:21,775
And you're an obstruction.
122
00:06:24,375 --> 00:06:28,055
The force could use more bodies
like yours.
123
00:06:28,135 --> 00:06:29,615
Here's my card.
124
00:06:31,375 --> 00:06:35,975
Let me slide my fingers into
that warm little pocket of yours.
125
00:06:41,175 --> 00:06:42,455
Help a blameless child...
126
00:06:42,535 --> 00:06:44,055
Witness number one, please.
127
00:06:44,135 --> 00:06:45,695
They even shot the owl.
128
00:06:45,775 --> 00:06:47,215
Why would a bank have an owl?
129
00:06:47,295 --> 00:06:48,295
All banks do.
130
00:06:48,375 --> 00:06:49,895
Where's the manager?
131
00:06:49,975 --> 00:06:51,295
Roger Quiver.
132
00:06:51,375 --> 00:06:53,735
I'm pretty sure that's what
they looked like.
133
00:06:53,815 --> 00:06:57,455
Left-handed, golf handicap 15,
never eaten moussaka,
134
00:06:57,535 --> 00:06:59,975
enjoys Homes Under the Hammer
and Steely Dan.
135
00:07:00,055 --> 00:07:01,575
DI Anne Oldman.
136
00:07:01,655 --> 00:07:04,695
The men who did this, was there
anything distinguishing about them?
137
00:07:04,775 --> 00:07:06,535
Accents? Stature? Hobbies?
138
00:07:06,615 --> 00:07:08,575
Witness number two, please.
139
00:07:08,655 --> 00:07:10,455
Thank you.
If you think of anything...
140
00:07:10,535 --> 00:07:11,855
Wait.
141
00:07:11,935 --> 00:07:13,215
What about their weight?
142
00:07:13,295 --> 00:07:17,775
They looked... normal.
I mean they were made of skin...
143
00:07:17,855 --> 00:07:20,975
But one of them had a tattoo.
144
00:07:21,055 --> 00:07:22,335
Sketch it for me.
145
00:07:35,575 --> 00:07:36,695
Asap. Guv!
146
00:07:36,775 --> 00:07:38,815
Get this to the
boys down the station, Asap.
147
00:07:38,895 --> 00:07:40,495
Des.
148
00:07:40,575 --> 00:07:41,655
Des?
149
00:07:43,695 --> 00:07:46,615
Poor bastard wasn't even on duty.
150
00:07:46,695 --> 00:07:48,375
Just popped in to look at the money.
151
00:07:48,455 --> 00:07:51,375
Paid the ultimate price trying to
save a member of the public.
152
00:07:51,455 --> 00:07:52,975
Killed by his own dedication.
153
00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:56,255
Killed by a bullet, actually.
154
00:07:56,335 --> 00:07:57,695
At least he died a hero.
155
00:07:57,775 --> 00:08:00,295
The kind of hero that shits himself.
156
00:08:00,375 --> 00:08:04,255
It seems fearless Mr Carty bravely
defecated as the bullet went in.
157
00:08:04,335 --> 00:08:07,815
Which either indicates terror or
a severe lead allergy.
158
00:08:07,895 --> 00:08:10,735
Try focussing on the evidence,
Natasha. I have.
159
00:08:10,815 --> 00:08:14,335
Carty may have brown-buttered
his britches like a petrified girl,
160
00:08:14,415 --> 00:08:17,895
but at least he had the presence
of mind to write that as he died.
161
00:08:17,975 --> 00:08:20,295
I assume it's a lead.
162
00:08:20,375 --> 00:08:23,855
It says "Macratty"
not that it's easy to tell.
163
00:08:23,935 --> 00:08:26,455
He ran out of room and had to
scrunch the last letters up.
164
00:08:26,535 --> 00:08:30,055
Hero he may have been.
Typographer he was not.
165
00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:32,255
Should've measured it
out in his head first.
166
00:08:32,335 --> 00:08:34,175
"Macratty".
167
00:08:34,255 --> 00:08:36,855
Is that all he wrote?
No.
168
00:08:36,935 --> 00:08:39,935
He also did some doodling as
they tried to revive him.
169
00:08:40,015 --> 00:08:42,295
Looks like he was bored.
170
00:08:42,375 --> 00:08:44,575
Oh. And he was clutching
this in his other hand.
171
00:08:44,655 --> 00:08:46,295
Some sort of rag.
172
00:08:46,375 --> 00:08:49,295
Perhaps he was planning to mop
up after himself.
173
00:08:49,375 --> 00:08:51,655
At least someone's tried to clean
up this mess,
174
00:08:51,735 --> 00:08:57,015
even if they were selfish enough to
turn dead in the process.
175
00:08:57,095 --> 00:08:59,535
Don't expect you've generated any
evidence of your own?
176
00:08:59,615 --> 00:09:02,775
Not much but whoever did this, sir,
knew what they were doing.
177
00:09:02,855 --> 00:09:05,775
I don't care if they knew all four
members of the Vengaboys.
178
00:09:05,855 --> 00:09:10,575
I'm the big man round here and
I want them caught, and caught hard.
179
00:09:10,655 --> 00:09:12,535
Have you seen our crime
statistics lately?
180
00:09:12,615 --> 00:09:14,975
No. Because someone stole them.
181
00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:19,375
Together with a kilo of heroin
from the vice squad tuck shop.
182
00:09:19,455 --> 00:09:20,695
It's not good enough, Oldman.
183
00:09:20,775 --> 00:09:21,895
OldMAN. Sir.
184
00:09:21,975 --> 00:09:23,615
It's not good enough, Old Man.
185
00:09:25,615 --> 00:09:28,055
You wanted a promotion.
186
00:09:28,135 --> 00:09:30,215
I suggest you earn it.
187
00:09:30,295 --> 00:09:34,615
And I also suggest you watch me
leave, grandly.
188
00:09:41,215 --> 00:09:43,855
Ad break number one, please.
189
00:09:51,058 --> 00:09:53,138
Assistant Chief Constable!
190
00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:55,638
Chief Constable - Mitt Sniff,
The Mirror. How much was taken?
191
00:09:55,674 --> 00:09:57,914
A figure in the region of many
pounds.
192
00:09:57,994 --> 00:09:59,594
Robin Stork, Bird-watching Now.
193
00:09:59,674 --> 00:10:00,834
Is it true they shot the owl?
194
00:10:00,874 --> 00:10:03,114
I heard it was a tawny owl,
they're increasingly rare.
195
00:10:03,194 --> 00:10:04,874
Yes, in the face.
196
00:10:04,954 --> 00:10:08,874
Jill Tits, Pestering Journalist.
Is the force losing control?
197
00:10:08,954 --> 00:10:10,954
What's that word women use?
198
00:10:11,034 --> 00:10:11,994
"No."
199
00:10:12,074 --> 00:10:14,234
What about the rumours
regarding your leadership?
200
00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:15,874
What rumours?
That no-one trusts you
201
00:10:15,954 --> 00:10:18,994
since that string of baroque revenge
killings you carried out last year.
202
00:10:19,074 --> 00:10:20,114
There was a full inquiry.
203
00:10:20,194 --> 00:10:22,794
I apologised and I went
on a rehabilitation course,
204
00:10:22,874 --> 00:10:26,194
so as far as everyone is concerned
that is the end of the matter.
205
00:10:26,274 --> 00:10:28,634
Does "everyone" include Jack Cloth?
206
00:10:31,754 --> 00:10:34,794
Jack Cloth is ancient history.
He's last week's hummus.
207
00:10:34,874 --> 00:10:38,274
Burnt out, washed up and bummed off.
He quit the force.
208
00:10:38,354 --> 00:10:40,394
He's out. He's gone away-o.
209
00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:44,834
And as far as I'm concerned,
that's the opposite of bad riddance.
210
00:10:44,914 --> 00:10:46,834
We never so much as mention
his name round here.
211
00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:48,594
We need Cloth, now.
212
00:10:48,674 --> 00:10:49,634
What?
213
00:10:51,354 --> 00:10:52,954
Look.
214
00:10:55,554 --> 00:10:56,954
Get rid of these vermin.
215
00:10:59,474 --> 00:11:03,154
Dave Clegg, Victim Today.
Are we being led to our deaths?
216
00:11:03,234 --> 00:11:04,754
In my office.
217
00:11:10,714 --> 00:11:12,354
That man turned his back
on the force.
218
00:11:12,434 --> 00:11:14,954
There's no second
chances in this job.
219
00:11:15,034 --> 00:11:15,994
Usually.
220
00:11:16,074 --> 00:11:17,914
I don't like it any more
than you do.
221
00:11:19,034 --> 00:11:21,754
The situation between Jack and me,
it's...
222
00:11:21,834 --> 00:11:23,474
complicated.
223
00:11:23,554 --> 00:11:25,074
"Complicated"?
224
00:11:25,154 --> 00:11:27,554
It's not just "complicated"...
225
00:11:27,634 --> 00:11:28,594
But...
226
00:11:28,674 --> 00:11:29,834
Painful.
227
00:11:31,634 --> 00:11:33,874
Things got messy on Jack's last case.
228
00:11:33,954 --> 00:11:34,994
Too messy.
229
00:11:40,714 --> 00:11:41,394
NOOOOO...!
230
00:11:49,354 --> 00:11:53,354
I know.
But Todd died giving us this lead.
231
00:11:53,434 --> 00:11:54,434
If we don't follow it up,
232
00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:57,714
it's like he died for nothing
in some pre-titles opening sequence.
233
00:11:57,794 --> 00:11:59,954
There's no choice.
We need Jack back.
234
00:12:01,714 --> 00:12:04,634
No-one's heard sight of him
since he left the force.
235
00:12:07,434 --> 00:12:09,914
Do you think he'll ever forgive me
for what I did to Kate?
236
00:12:09,994 --> 00:12:12,154
Jack doesn't blame you, Tom.
237
00:12:12,234 --> 00:12:13,274
He blames himself.
238
00:12:28,954 --> 00:12:30,354
There you go, my love.
239
00:12:31,394 --> 00:12:34,234
All nice and neat,
just the way you like it.
240
00:12:48,994 --> 00:12:51,154
I remember
when you used to trim my garden.
241
00:12:53,114 --> 00:12:54,154
Hello Jack.
242
00:12:56,714 --> 00:12:58,834
I thought you never wanted to see me
again, Oldman.
243
00:12:58,914 --> 00:12:59,874
OldMAN.
244
00:13:01,394 --> 00:13:03,674
I thought you never wanted to see me
again, Old Man.
245
00:13:03,754 --> 00:13:04,714
I didn't.
246
00:13:06,794 --> 00:13:08,434
So then why are you here?
247
00:13:08,514 --> 00:13:11,874
The boys down the station...
they need your help with something.
248
00:13:11,954 --> 00:13:13,754
I don't fix vending
machines any more.
249
00:13:15,114 --> 00:13:16,634
There was a bank job.
250
00:13:16,714 --> 00:13:19,234
I read about it on the radio,
looks complicated.
251
00:13:19,314 --> 00:13:22,114
It also looks like it's
none of my business.
252
00:13:22,194 --> 00:13:23,754
Jack, they shot the owl.
253
00:13:29,714 --> 00:13:31,554
Owls die.
254
00:13:31,634 --> 00:13:32,794
They shot Todd, too.
255
00:13:39,394 --> 00:13:40,994
Don't tell me he's dead.
256
00:13:42,674 --> 00:13:44,314
Is he dead?
257
00:13:44,394 --> 00:13:45,994
Yes. Agh!
258
00:13:46,074 --> 00:13:47,314
I said don't tell me.
259
00:13:53,194 --> 00:13:55,714
Before he died, Todd wrote
a name in blood.
260
00:13:55,794 --> 00:13:56,754
Macratty.
261
00:13:59,994 --> 00:14:01,954
Michael Macratty.
262
00:14:02,034 --> 00:14:04,194
You know him? Only by reputation.
263
00:14:04,274 --> 00:14:06,834
If it's unpleasant and unlegal,
he's into it.
264
00:14:06,914 --> 00:14:09,394
Guns, drugs, gluing dogs to planks
265
00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:11,434
and throwing them out of
helicopters.
266
00:14:11,514 --> 00:14:12,594
What does he look like?
267
00:14:12,674 --> 00:14:14,394
We don't know.
268
00:14:14,474 --> 00:14:15,994
Macratty's like a ghost.
269
00:14:16,074 --> 00:14:17,194
Timothy Claypole?
270
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:19,274
He can't be caught.
271
00:14:19,354 --> 00:14:21,594
We could catch him.
272
00:14:21,674 --> 00:14:23,714
Together.
273
00:14:23,794 --> 00:14:27,274
Jack, you know Macratty's world.
274
00:14:27,354 --> 00:14:29,314
You've lived on Earth
the whole of your life.
275
00:14:29,394 --> 00:14:30,674
It's like you were born there.
276
00:14:30,754 --> 00:14:33,314
I was born in hell
the day my wife died.
277
00:14:33,394 --> 00:14:35,514
Egg and sweets with toast.
278
00:14:35,594 --> 00:14:38,474
I know you want to bring
Macratty down.
279
00:14:38,554 --> 00:14:39,914
You're still hungry.
280
00:14:39,994 --> 00:14:41,394
I can see it.
281
00:14:41,474 --> 00:14:44,994
You expect me to put this down
and come and work for Tom Boss?
282
00:14:45,074 --> 00:14:47,234
I've got two words for you. No.
283
00:14:47,314 --> 00:14:50,114
Boss went on a course.
He hasn't killed anyone in months.
284
00:14:50,194 --> 00:14:51,994
Both answers are still no. Jack!
285
00:14:54,354 --> 00:14:56,634
If this is about what
happened between us...
286
00:14:56,714 --> 00:14:58,714
Nothing happened between us.
287
00:15:00,314 --> 00:15:02,234
And nothing ever will again.
288
00:15:02,314 --> 00:15:03,714
That's a lie and you know it.
289
00:15:03,794 --> 00:15:05,554
Lean closer and say that.
290
00:15:05,634 --> 00:15:08,154
I said that's a lie and I want you.
291
00:15:08,234 --> 00:15:09,874
Closer.
292
00:15:09,954 --> 00:15:14,314
I want you Jack, is that enough?
293
00:15:14,394 --> 00:15:16,354
I was wrong to leave.
294
00:15:16,434 --> 00:15:20,874
I cry so much these days my face
thinks it lives underwater...
295
00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:23,794
I need you, you bastard...
296
00:15:23,874 --> 00:15:27,474
I need you in me right here,
right now...
297
00:15:28,834 --> 00:15:31,474
When I said no, I meant no.
298
00:15:31,554 --> 00:15:33,954
And no.
299
00:15:34,034 --> 00:15:36,114
Jack, wait.
300
00:15:36,194 --> 00:15:39,234
You don't want me anyway.
You're gay.
301
00:15:39,314 --> 00:15:40,314
Bi, Jack.
302
00:15:45,274 --> 00:15:47,114
Egg and piss.
303
00:15:53,714 --> 00:15:57,994
The funeral of beloved
actor-turned policeman Todd Carty
304
00:15:58,074 --> 00:15:59,234
took place today,
305
00:15:59,314 --> 00:16:04,554
as a stunned nation entered its
fifth official day of mourning.
306
00:16:04,634 --> 00:16:08,474
Friends and colleagues of Carty
continued to pay their respects
307
00:16:08,554 --> 00:16:12,994
and make specific requests of
embittered hard-drinking mavericks.
308
00:16:13,074 --> 00:16:16,074
Why would someone shoot Todd?
Todd never shot anyone.
309
00:16:16,154 --> 00:16:17,834
Not on purpose.
310
00:16:17,914 --> 00:16:19,754
Someone should avenge him.
311
00:16:19,834 --> 00:16:21,554
Someone Scottish.
312
00:16:21,634 --> 00:16:24,154
The person who did this
is walking around free,
313
00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:27,474
while Todd, he's lying in the ground
like a parsnip.
314
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:30,274
Never been so angry
since Willmott-Brown.
315
00:16:30,354 --> 00:16:31,994
I'm sick to the tits.
316
00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:33,394
In all my years as an officer
317
00:16:33,474 --> 00:16:36,474
I've never seen a crime
shatter a community like this.
318
00:16:36,554 --> 00:16:39,714
I mean look around,
their eyes, they're pissing tears.
319
00:16:39,794 --> 00:16:41,674
It's like they can't believe it.
320
00:16:41,754 --> 00:16:45,754
They don't want to believe it.
They're like "Oh, no - not Todd.
321
00:16:45,834 --> 00:16:47,594
"Oh, no. Not Todd.
322
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:50,994
"Oh, please, not Todd."
That's what they're like.
323
00:16:51,074 --> 00:16:55,034
Someone in a position to do
something about this has to
324
00:16:55,114 --> 00:16:56,914
ensure justice is done.
325
00:16:56,994 --> 00:16:59,994
They need to stop being so bloody
maudlin,
326
00:17:00,074 --> 00:17:01,634
put down that drink,
327
00:17:01,714 --> 00:17:06,034
rejoin the force and stride manfully
into the briefing room
328
00:17:06,114 --> 00:17:10,754
saying, "OK, listen up.
It's time to catch these bastards."
329
00:17:13,634 --> 00:17:18,194
OK, listen up.
It's time to catch these bastards.
330
00:17:18,274 --> 00:17:22,874
This is crime boss and mega-turd
Michael Macratty.
331
00:17:22,954 --> 00:17:25,154
As you can see, he's mysterious.
332
00:17:25,234 --> 00:17:27,474
So mysterious we don't even know
what he looks like.
333
00:17:27,554 --> 00:17:28,514
But we know he's black.
334
00:17:28,594 --> 00:17:30,394
That's just an artist's impression.
335
00:17:30,474 --> 00:17:33,274
Macratty's as slippery as greased
Hellmann's,
336
00:17:33,354 --> 00:17:36,714
as unpredictable
as a werewolf on malaria pills.
337
00:17:36,794 --> 00:17:38,274
Long suspected to be behind a series
338
00:17:38,354 --> 00:17:41,234
of increasingly audacious
scrap metal thefts...
339
00:17:42,554 --> 00:17:48,674
He's recently graduated to
armed robbery and murder.
340
00:17:48,754 --> 00:17:53,034
We somehow have to prove
a link between him and this.
341
00:17:53,114 --> 00:17:55,514
We need to map Macratty's network.
342
00:17:55,594 --> 00:17:59,514
I want to find out who he knows,
where he goes,
343
00:17:59,594 --> 00:18:01,994
what he does,
in which size gloves...
344
00:18:02,074 --> 00:18:03,794
What he eats, how he sleeps...
345
00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:05,674
Under blankets? Under sheets?
346
00:18:05,754 --> 00:18:07,274
Is he single? Is he taken?
347
00:18:07,354 --> 00:18:09,514
How crispy does he like his bacon?
348
00:18:09,594 --> 00:18:11,354
Upper, middle, working class?
349
00:18:11,434 --> 00:18:14,714
Which hand's employed to wipe
his arse? What's his blood group?
350
00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:16,834
What's his sign?
What's his take on Palestine?
351
00:18:16,914 --> 00:18:21,674
Who's his mother, who's his dad?
Has he read Beevor's Stalingrad?
352
00:18:21,754 --> 00:18:23,714
What's his height,
what's his weight?
353
00:18:23,794 --> 00:18:25,314
How often does he masturbate?
354
00:18:25,394 --> 00:18:28,514
Is he churlish, shy or chatty?
355
00:18:28,594 --> 00:18:30,954
Who is the real Mike Macratty?
356
00:18:32,914 --> 00:18:35,154
Solve these riddles if you can...
357
00:18:35,234 --> 00:18:37,754
and together we can stop this man.
358
00:18:39,594 --> 00:18:41,394
Any questions?
359
00:18:41,474 --> 00:18:42,474
OK.
360
00:18:42,554 --> 00:18:43,834
Let's po-lice.
361
00:18:45,514 --> 00:18:47,874
Qureshi, set up a wiretap,
we're going to need monitors,
362
00:18:47,954 --> 00:18:50,154
microphones, lights,
Steadicam operators
363
00:18:50,234 --> 00:18:51,714
and some sort of distribution deal
364
00:18:51,794 --> 00:18:54,154
for first-run satellite
and DVD rights. I'm on it, guv.
365
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,874
Anne, Des, we're going to sit
in a car looking at a scrap yard.
366
00:18:56,954 --> 00:18:58,794
Think you can handle that?
Is the car on fire?
367
00:18:58,874 --> 00:19:00,994
Absolutely not.
Piece of piss, guv.
368
00:19:07,914 --> 00:19:09,034
What's that?
369
00:19:09,114 --> 00:19:13,274
It's a prehensile extremity used to
manipulate the environment.
370
00:19:13,354 --> 00:19:14,794
To offer friendship.
371
00:19:16,474 --> 00:19:17,954
That hand killed my wife.
372
00:19:18,034 --> 00:19:19,394
Actually that was this hand.
373
00:19:19,474 --> 00:19:22,194
A murderer and a pedant?
You're pathetic.
374
00:19:22,274 --> 00:19:25,994
I hear you're back on board
for the Macratty investigation.
375
00:19:26,074 --> 00:19:27,395
It's good to have you back, Jack.
376
00:19:27,474 --> 00:19:29,394
I'm doing this for Todd -
and the owl.
377
00:19:29,474 --> 00:19:31,634
Not you. You're nothing to me.
378
00:19:31,714 --> 00:19:35,474
I wouldn't cross the street to watch
you urinate into a teacup.
379
00:19:35,554 --> 00:19:36,954
I'm sorry about Kate.
380
00:19:37,034 --> 00:19:38,674
Don't you EVER say her name.
381
00:19:38,754 --> 00:19:40,594
What, Kate? Gah!
382
00:19:40,674 --> 00:19:42,234
Stop it! Jack, stop it.
383
00:19:42,314 --> 00:19:44,554
No-one's expecting you
to like each other.
384
00:19:44,634 --> 00:19:46,594
But you're working together.
385
00:19:46,674 --> 00:19:48,994
Think of Todd. Oh, fuck Todd. Oh!
386
00:19:49,074 --> 00:19:51,034
I'm sorry you had to hear that,
Mrs McCluskey.
387
00:19:51,114 --> 00:19:53,354
And I'm sure Jack is sorry too.
388
00:19:53,434 --> 00:19:54,874
Oh...
389
00:19:57,714 --> 00:20:00,234
Both of you shake hands.
390
00:20:02,554 --> 00:20:03,594
I'll shake your hand.
391
00:20:03,674 --> 00:20:06,514
But don't expect me to hold you down
and kiss you roughly on the mouth.
392
00:20:06,594 --> 00:20:08,034
I don't. Good.
393
00:20:27,794 --> 00:20:31,314
Guy in the T-shirt is
one of Macratty's goons.
394
00:20:31,394 --> 00:20:33,674
You and Des go see
what you can get out of him.
395
00:20:48,354 --> 00:20:49,594
Is Macratty in?
396
00:20:52,194 --> 00:20:53,194
Who wants to know?
397
00:20:53,274 --> 00:20:55,154
Police.
398
00:20:55,234 --> 00:20:57,114
Not here. What's your name?
399
00:20:58,474 --> 00:20:59,594
Who wants to know?
400
00:20:59,674 --> 00:21:01,714
Us again.
401
00:21:01,794 --> 00:21:03,194
Hairy hand.
402
00:21:03,274 --> 00:21:05,354
Oh, you can read then,
whoever you are.
403
00:21:05,434 --> 00:21:06,834
They call me Bullock.
404
00:21:08,794 --> 00:21:10,194
Yah!
405
00:21:12,274 --> 00:21:13,714
Has Macratty been here today?
406
00:21:13,794 --> 00:21:15,674
Who wants to know?
407
00:21:15,754 --> 00:21:18,074
Tell you what, Bullock.
408
00:21:18,154 --> 00:21:19,754
I'll make it simple.
409
00:21:19,834 --> 00:21:21,834
Where were you Wednesday
morning, 12:30?
410
00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:24,434
And before you ask who
wants to know, I do.
411
00:21:24,514 --> 00:21:27,834
I was here. All day.
412
00:21:27,914 --> 00:21:29,234
Anyone that can back that up?
413
00:21:29,314 --> 00:21:31,514
Tumbler can.
Isn't that right Tumbler?
414
00:21:31,594 --> 00:21:33,114
He was here all day.
415
00:21:43,914 --> 00:21:45,474
Where'd you get the tattoo?
416
00:21:48,914 --> 00:21:50,914
I don't ask questions.
417
00:21:50,994 --> 00:21:52,834
Don't you?
418
00:21:52,914 --> 00:21:53,914
Who wants to know?
419
00:21:53,994 --> 00:21:56,274
Thought you said you don't
ask questions.
420
00:21:56,354 --> 00:21:57,954
Where will we find Macratty?
421
00:22:07,634 --> 00:22:09,594
By the way...
422
00:22:09,674 --> 00:22:11,874
there's something
I'm not telling you.
423
00:22:22,594 --> 00:22:24,714
There's something he's
not telling us.
424
00:22:24,794 --> 00:22:25,914
Not yet.
425
00:22:25,994 --> 00:22:27,554
Not with his mouth.
426
00:22:27,634 --> 00:22:29,034
What does that mean?
427
00:22:29,114 --> 00:22:30,194
I don't know.
428
00:22:42,895 --> 00:22:44,735
Our first mark.
429
00:22:44,952 --> 00:22:47,272
Street-name, "Bullock."
430
00:22:47,352 --> 00:22:48,972
Tattoo puts him at the scene.
431
00:22:49,062 --> 00:22:51,662
Get close to Bullock, he'll lead us
straight to Macratty.
432
00:22:51,742 --> 00:22:53,582
The question is,
how do we earn his trust?
433
00:22:53,662 --> 00:22:54,782
With some sausages?
434
00:22:54,862 --> 00:22:56,742
With a disguise.
435
00:22:56,822 --> 00:22:58,222
I'm going undercover.
436
00:23:00,702 --> 00:23:03,262
If they find out you're police,
they'll shoot you in the head.
437
00:23:03,342 --> 00:23:06,182
So what? Or cut your throat open and
pull your tongue through the hole
438
00:23:06,262 --> 00:23:07,982
so it flops around like a necktie.
439
00:23:08,062 --> 00:23:09,262
Nothing I can't handle.
440
00:23:09,342 --> 00:23:11,782
Or drive you to Swanage
and just leave you there.
441
00:23:11,862 --> 00:23:13,222
I love Swanage.
442
00:23:16,142 --> 00:23:17,662
Jack, they're right.
443
00:23:17,742 --> 00:23:20,262
You can't go undercover,
it's too risky.
444
00:23:20,342 --> 00:23:21,502
You could die.
445
00:23:21,582 --> 00:23:23,142
I've got nothing to live for anyway.
446
00:23:23,222 --> 00:23:24,502
That's not true, Jack.
447
00:23:24,582 --> 00:23:26,382
Isn't it?
448
00:23:26,462 --> 00:23:27,823
What do I have to look forward to?
449
00:23:27,902 --> 00:23:29,782
I don't even have any DVD box
sets on the go.
450
00:23:29,862 --> 00:23:31,382
Things change, Jack.
451
00:23:31,462 --> 00:23:33,222
Pain never changes.
452
00:23:33,302 --> 00:23:35,622
Look at me. I've lost everything
I ever cared about.
453
00:23:35,702 --> 00:23:36,862
Even my shoes.
454
00:23:38,862 --> 00:23:40,302
Not everything, Jack.
455
00:23:43,062 --> 00:23:44,062
Don't.
456
00:23:47,542 --> 00:23:50,502
Can't you see?
You'd be kissing a dead man.
457
00:23:50,582 --> 00:23:52,102
Fellating a corpse.
458
00:23:52,182 --> 00:23:53,622
Rimming a... I don't care.
459
00:23:53,702 --> 00:23:56,302
Maybe not. But so do I.
460
00:24:00,662 --> 00:24:01,902
Hello?
461
00:24:01,982 --> 00:24:03,262
Anne Oldman?
462
00:24:03,342 --> 00:24:05,342
It's pronounced "Old Man."
463
00:24:05,422 --> 00:24:06,462
Who is this?
464
00:24:06,542 --> 00:24:09,462
Mayor-in-waiting Hope Goodgirl.
Pronounced just how I said it.
465
00:24:09,542 --> 00:24:11,622
Is this a good time?
466
00:24:11,702 --> 00:24:13,062
Who gave you this number?
467
00:24:13,142 --> 00:24:15,262
999? You're in the book.
468
00:24:15,342 --> 00:24:16,622
This better be important.
469
00:24:16,702 --> 00:24:18,702
I don't have time for a sub-plot
right now.
470
00:24:18,782 --> 00:24:21,142
Prickly. I'll keep it short.
471
00:24:21,222 --> 00:24:24,742
The future fascinates me.
Does it fascinate you?
472
00:24:24,822 --> 00:24:26,022
Yes.
473
00:24:26,102 --> 00:24:27,222
No...
474
00:24:27,302 --> 00:24:28,302
I don't know.
475
00:24:28,382 --> 00:24:31,382
Well, it should.
I'd like to discuss your future.
476
00:24:31,462 --> 00:24:33,622
Maybe... over dinner?
477
00:24:33,702 --> 00:24:36,222
OK, fine, whatever.
478
00:24:37,422 --> 00:24:38,822
Tonight.
479
00:24:38,902 --> 00:24:41,582
Sappho restaurant Ladyglove Street.
480
00:24:41,662 --> 00:24:43,262
Don't let me down.
481
00:24:43,342 --> 00:24:44,462
OK.
482
00:24:49,862 --> 00:24:52,222
These guys are ruthless criminals.
483
00:24:52,302 --> 00:24:53,742
The only way to earn their respect
484
00:24:53,822 --> 00:24:56,822
is to walk in there and pay them
absolutely no respect.
485
00:24:57,862 --> 00:24:59,982
This wire of yours better be
discreet.
486
00:25:00,062 --> 00:25:03,342
Don't worry, guv.
It's invisible to the naked eye.
487
00:25:03,422 --> 00:25:05,582
Apart from this transmitter.
488
00:25:11,062 --> 00:25:12,462
OK.
489
00:25:12,542 --> 00:25:15,782
The important thing about these
operations is to stay in character.
490
00:25:15,862 --> 00:25:18,982
So, ask me some questions. Test me.
491
00:25:19,062 --> 00:25:20,382
Where'd you get the goods from?
492
00:25:20,462 --> 00:25:21,822
Stole them. Illegally.
493
00:25:21,902 --> 00:25:24,782
You done time?
Five-stretch, Belmarsh, GBH.
494
00:25:24,862 --> 00:25:26,782
Kicked a nonce to death
with his own leg.
495
00:25:26,862 --> 00:25:28,222
You a copper? Probably not.
496
00:25:28,302 --> 00:25:30,102
What's your name? Jack.
497
00:25:30,182 --> 00:25:31,222
That IS your name.
498
00:25:31,302 --> 00:25:34,382
This is spelt J-A-C-Q-U-E-S.
Jacques.
499
00:25:34,462 --> 00:25:37,622
But pronouncing it "Jack"
means that if anyone calls my name
500
00:25:37,702 --> 00:25:41,102
I'll react naturally, as though Jack
was my name - which it is.
501
00:25:42,222 --> 00:25:43,862
Try it.
502
00:25:43,942 --> 00:25:44,982
Jack? Yeah.
503
00:25:45,062 --> 00:25:46,062
Jack. Yeah.
504
00:25:46,142 --> 00:25:47,102
Jack. Hello.
505
00:25:51,942 --> 00:25:54,142
Jack, wait...
506
00:25:54,222 --> 00:25:55,902
Don't forget which side you're on.
507
00:25:55,982 --> 00:25:57,302
I'm not on a side.
508
00:25:57,382 --> 00:26:00,942
I'm on the edge,
and edges don't have sides.
509
00:26:01,022 --> 00:26:02,862
No, I meant this side...
510
00:26:04,702 --> 00:26:06,262
opens onto the road.
511
00:26:31,062 --> 00:26:32,902
Check it out.
512
00:26:32,982 --> 00:26:34,382
What's your name?
513
00:26:34,462 --> 00:26:37,822
Jacques. Pronounced "Jack."
514
00:26:37,902 --> 00:26:39,702
Jack what?
515
00:26:39,782 --> 00:26:41,462
My surname?
516
00:26:41,542 --> 00:26:43,102
It's, er...
517
00:26:44,662 --> 00:26:45,742
Copper
518
00:26:47,822 --> 00:26:49,862
Jack Copper?
519
00:26:51,982 --> 00:26:53,462
Pronounced "Coppaire."
520
00:26:55,262 --> 00:26:56,862
Jack Coppaire.
521
00:26:58,502 --> 00:27:01,262
Do you have a name, or do you just
go by that distinctive odour?
522
00:27:01,342 --> 00:27:02,622
Bullock.
523
00:27:04,382 --> 00:27:06,622
I don't like smart arses. Uh-huh?
524
00:27:06,702 --> 00:27:09,622
What kind do you like?
Little pink ones?
525
00:27:11,022 --> 00:27:14,502
He's a comedian.
Tell us a joke, funny man.
526
00:27:14,582 --> 00:27:17,542
What's the difference between a
King Edward and your mother?
527
00:27:17,622 --> 00:27:18,982
Surprise me.
528
00:27:19,062 --> 00:27:21,382
One's a potato. The other's a whore.
529
00:27:22,902 --> 00:27:24,062
He's going to over-cock.
530
00:27:24,142 --> 00:27:25,902
Jack knows what he's doing.
531
00:27:25,982 --> 00:27:27,822
Augh-augh-augh...
532
00:27:27,902 --> 00:27:29,342
Mm-mm-mm...
533
00:27:29,422 --> 00:27:30,422
Ohh...
534
00:27:30,502 --> 00:27:34,222
Augh-augh-augh...
535
00:27:37,462 --> 00:27:40,062
Ugh-ugh-ugh-ugh...
536
00:27:40,142 --> 00:27:42,222
Oh-oh-oh-oh...
537
00:27:47,062 --> 00:27:49,942
Augh-augh-augh...
538
00:27:51,342 --> 00:27:53,862
Pffrrt-pffrrt-pffrrt...
539
00:27:53,942 --> 00:27:56,342
Mm-mm-mm.
540
00:27:56,422 --> 00:27:58,902
Mm-mm... Mmmm.
541
00:27:58,982 --> 00:28:01,702
That's your mother
on What's My Line.
542
00:28:01,782 --> 00:28:04,142
Hope you like the taste of fists,
funny man.
543
00:28:04,222 --> 00:28:05,782
Not as much as she does.
544
00:28:05,862 --> 00:28:07,782
Although she doesn't take them
orally.
545
00:28:09,502 --> 00:28:10,502
He's right.
546
00:28:11,622 --> 00:28:12,862
It's a car.
547
00:28:12,942 --> 00:28:15,022
I've seen cars before. Yeah.
548
00:28:15,102 --> 00:28:16,622
But you break that car down
549
00:28:16,702 --> 00:28:20,182
and you've got at least Ј400-worth
of scrap metal on your hands.
550
00:28:20,262 --> 00:28:21,942
400...?
551
00:28:23,422 --> 00:28:25,782
You can get your hands on more
motors, can you?
552
00:28:25,862 --> 00:28:27,102
Is the Pope a Catholic?
553
00:28:28,142 --> 00:28:29,422
What's a "Pope"?
554
00:28:29,502 --> 00:28:31,742
I can get more motors
than you can think of.
555
00:28:31,822 --> 00:28:32,902
More than six?
556
00:28:34,102 --> 00:28:35,422
Will they all have wheels?
557
00:28:35,502 --> 00:28:36,782
Doors too.
558
00:28:36,862 --> 00:28:38,702
And not just cars.
559
00:28:38,782 --> 00:28:42,662
Trains, planes, submarines,
mole-machines.
560
00:28:42,742 --> 00:28:45,582
You want a battleship?
I can hotwire one like that.
561
00:28:46,982 --> 00:28:48,142
Now, do we have a deal,
562
00:28:48,222 --> 00:28:50,742
or are we just jerking
each other's tits here?
563
00:28:53,102 --> 00:28:54,302
Let's go see the boss.
564
00:29:06,902 --> 00:29:08,062
Sounds like we're in.
565
00:29:59,702 --> 00:30:01,702
Mr Macratty.
566
00:30:01,782 --> 00:30:05,622
This calls itself Jack Coppaire.
567
00:30:05,702 --> 00:30:07,062
Does she, now?
568
00:30:07,142 --> 00:30:10,182
Nice place... if you're into shit.
569
00:30:10,262 --> 00:30:11,742
We've got to get him out of there.
570
00:30:11,822 --> 00:30:13,662
Not yet. Just give him a chance.
571
00:30:13,742 --> 00:30:14,982
I don't like lip.
572
00:30:15,062 --> 00:30:17,982
More of an arse man?
Like boyfriend, like son?
573
00:30:22,822 --> 00:30:25,542
Get us a pint of milk
on your way to the afterlife.
574
00:30:25,622 --> 00:30:27,422
Guv!
575
00:30:27,502 --> 00:30:28,942
Let's get him out of there.
576
00:30:29,022 --> 00:30:32,502
Shoot me if you want.
But I've got something you need.
577
00:30:32,582 --> 00:30:33,622
Oxygen?
578
00:30:33,702 --> 00:30:36,022
Wait...
579
00:30:36,102 --> 00:30:37,182
Jack's up to something.
580
00:30:37,262 --> 00:30:39,062
Merchandise.
581
00:30:39,142 --> 00:30:40,942
Where's this "merchandise"?
582
00:30:41,022 --> 00:30:43,622
Let's just say I had to bring it
through customs...
583
00:30:43,702 --> 00:30:45,622
In my brown suitcase.
584
00:30:45,702 --> 00:30:46,982
It still there?
585
00:30:47,062 --> 00:30:49,542
I don't walk this way out of choice.
586
00:30:49,622 --> 00:30:51,342
Bullock, take a look.
587
00:31:23,222 --> 00:31:24,542
What's happening?
588
00:31:24,622 --> 00:31:26,462
Sounds like...
589
00:31:26,542 --> 00:31:30,102
someone's pulling a large skittle
out of a bucket of wet clay...
590
00:31:40,702 --> 00:31:42,662
They've thrown summat on the table.
What is it?
591
00:31:42,742 --> 00:31:44,622
A kind of furniture.
And the thing they threw?
592
00:31:44,702 --> 00:31:46,782
According to the waveforms...
593
00:31:46,862 --> 00:31:49,502
it's a kilo of pharmaceutical grade
heroin.
594
00:31:49,582 --> 00:31:51,062
From the vice squad tuck shop.
595
00:31:51,142 --> 00:31:53,902
Jack! You've forgotten which
side you're on.
596
00:32:17,942 --> 00:32:20,462
Maybe you should've
washed your hands before dinner.
597
00:32:24,902 --> 00:32:25,902
Well?
598
00:32:29,462 --> 00:32:31,942
Looks like I'm about to
make a new friend.
599
00:32:32,022 --> 00:32:33,262
I'm not on Facebook.
600
00:33:14,822 --> 00:33:15,982
Ahh.
601
00:33:16,062 --> 00:33:17,742
That could've been sticky.
602
00:33:20,782 --> 00:33:22,182
Does this burn DVDs?
603
00:33:24,382 --> 00:33:25,622
Take a good look.
604
00:33:25,702 --> 00:33:28,342
Because this is Michael Macratty.
605
00:33:28,422 --> 00:33:29,542
I thought he'd be bigger.
606
00:33:29,622 --> 00:33:30,742
And rounder.
607
00:33:30,822 --> 00:33:32,062
And have arms and legs.
608
00:33:32,142 --> 00:33:33,502
Well, this is just a photograph.
609
00:33:33,582 --> 00:33:35,382
The real Macratty's 3D
and in colour.
610
00:33:35,462 --> 00:33:36,702
Like Toy Story 3?
611
00:33:36,782 --> 00:33:39,022
Of course I like Toy Story 3,
it's absolutely magical
612
00:33:39,102 --> 00:33:40,262
but that's irrelevant, Des.
613
00:33:40,342 --> 00:33:45,382
We need to take a good hard
look at Macratty close up...
614
00:33:45,462 --> 00:33:49,622
and keep looking at him close up, no
matter who or what gets in the way.
615
00:33:49,702 --> 00:33:52,662
Even if it means we have to steal
heroin from the vice squad tuck shop
616
00:33:52,742 --> 00:33:53,702
to earn his trust?
617
00:33:53,782 --> 00:33:55,622
You can't wipe away vile human scum
618
00:33:55,702 --> 00:33:57,582
without getting your fingernails
dirty.
619
00:33:57,662 --> 00:33:59,742
Ask my cleaning lady,
she'll tell you.
620
00:33:59,822 --> 00:34:00,982
In Polish.
621
00:34:01,062 --> 00:34:03,982
But you stealing that heroin
makes no sense, guv.
622
00:34:04,062 --> 00:34:05,862
Why? Because it's wrong?
623
00:34:05,942 --> 00:34:08,582
Because you weren't even working
here when Boss said it'd gone,
624
00:34:08,662 --> 00:34:09,822
back at the bank. So?
625
00:34:09,902 --> 00:34:13,102
So, it's against all established
rules of narrative.
626
00:34:13,182 --> 00:34:15,022
I don't have time for
rules of narrative.
627
00:34:15,102 --> 00:34:17,462
But in terms of continuity alone...
Forget continuity!
628
00:34:17,542 --> 00:34:19,862
Sometimes you've got to break
the law to protect the law.
629
00:34:19,942 --> 00:34:22,062
I'll steal that heroin before it
exists if I have to.
630
00:34:22,142 --> 00:34:24,822
And there's not a damn
thing you can do to stop me. Jack!
631
00:34:24,902 --> 00:34:27,502
You're forgetting which side
you're on. Not Macratty's side.
632
00:34:27,582 --> 00:34:28,782
Our side. Homicide.
633
00:34:32,182 --> 00:34:34,502
Work it out amongst yourselves.
634
00:34:34,582 --> 00:34:36,062
I've got somewhere to be.
635
00:34:38,382 --> 00:34:39,982
Mm.
636
00:34:40,062 --> 00:34:41,742
I love eating out.
637
00:34:41,822 --> 00:34:43,182
Do you love eating out?
638
00:34:43,262 --> 00:34:45,342
I love eating out.
639
00:34:45,422 --> 00:34:48,262
Oh, um, I'll have the lesbian
special, please.
640
00:34:48,342 --> 00:34:50,382
Mm-hm, OK.
641
00:34:50,462 --> 00:34:54,742
Um... Why don't you try the clam?
642
00:34:54,822 --> 00:34:57,782
It comes drenched in its own juices.
You'll lap it up.
643
00:34:58,902 --> 00:35:00,662
I'll take that. Great.
644
00:35:02,342 --> 00:35:04,342
Here's to our future job prospects.
645
00:35:04,422 --> 00:35:05,542
"Our" prospects...?
646
00:35:05,622 --> 00:35:09,542
When I become mayor, which I will...
647
00:35:09,622 --> 00:35:11,022
I'll need a new chief of police.
648
00:35:11,102 --> 00:35:13,502
What? What about Tom Boss?
649
00:35:13,582 --> 00:35:14,942
Tom Boss will be replaced.
650
00:35:15,022 --> 00:35:16,702
He'll be devastated to lose his job.
651
00:35:16,782 --> 00:35:18,422
He's a big man, he can take it.
652
00:35:18,502 --> 00:35:21,782
He's a great policeman.
Who murdered 13 people.
653
00:35:21,862 --> 00:35:23,222
Apart from that.
654
00:35:23,302 --> 00:35:25,742
A leopard can't change its tune.
655
00:35:25,822 --> 00:35:27,502
Maybe you should keep an eye on him.
656
00:35:27,582 --> 00:35:31,102
When he's not near a sword,
I trust Tom Boss with my life.
657
00:35:31,182 --> 00:35:32,662
Loyal.
658
00:35:32,742 --> 00:35:34,302
I like that.
659
00:35:34,382 --> 00:35:36,582
And you're... upfront.
660
00:35:36,662 --> 00:35:38,342
Upfront is good.
661
00:35:38,422 --> 00:35:40,502
Do you like it upfront?
662
00:35:40,582 --> 00:35:42,982
Or would you prefer us to lie
side by side
663
00:35:43,062 --> 00:35:47,302
and rub our fannies together
like two pieces of chamois leather?
664
00:35:47,382 --> 00:35:48,702
In the nude.
665
00:35:55,022 --> 00:35:57,462
I look forward to us
working together.
666
00:35:58,822 --> 00:36:01,022
Mm. I think your clam is ready.
667
00:36:02,782 --> 00:36:05,702
And it's absolutely steaming.
668
00:36:23,562 --> 00:36:25,162
Hey.
669
00:36:25,242 --> 00:36:29,042
I think Macratty's about to say some
important dialogue to Jack.
670
00:36:29,049 --> 00:36:31,969
I think you might be able to help me
out with something, Jack.
671
00:36:32,049 --> 00:36:35,109
I need an extra pair of hands
on a job that's coming up,
672
00:36:35,186 --> 00:36:36,626
someone high up is calling.
673
00:36:36,706 --> 00:36:38,786
The big man needs us to hit the
local museum,
674
00:36:38,866 --> 00:36:40,866
top secret, top dollar, top pocket,
675
00:36:40,946 --> 00:36:44,306
top gear, top bollocks, top hat,
white tie and tails.
676
00:36:44,386 --> 00:36:45,866
We're not meant to talk about that.
677
00:36:45,946 --> 00:36:48,626
What if someone's listening
on headphones?
678
00:36:48,706 --> 00:36:50,746
Shut it. No, the big man said we're
not meant to...
679
00:36:50,826 --> 00:36:51,866
I said shut it!
680
00:36:55,666 --> 00:36:56,986
Eat your lolly.
681
00:37:00,986 --> 00:37:02,746
There's someone above Macratty.
682
00:37:02,826 --> 00:37:04,026
Run a search for "big man".
683
00:37:04,106 --> 00:37:05,226
I'm on it.
684
00:37:06,386 --> 00:37:08,146
OK...
685
00:37:08,226 --> 00:37:10,386
got a description for "big man."
686
00:37:10,466 --> 00:37:13,506
Black, well-built, distinctive ribs,
687
00:37:13,586 --> 00:37:15,226
wipes clean for storage,
688
00:37:15,306 --> 00:37:18,146
twin-speed with pulse function,
takes 4 AA batteries.
689
00:37:18,226 --> 00:37:20,386
Add it to the shopping basket.
690
00:37:20,466 --> 00:37:23,106
Stay loyal,
and I'll look after you, Coppaire.
691
00:37:23,186 --> 00:37:26,866
Betray me and I'll rip you inside out
from your arsehole to your teeth.
692
00:37:26,946 --> 00:37:28,786
You'll be staring at the back
of your own head
693
00:37:28,866 --> 00:37:31,026
while I use your guts
for a skipping rope.
694
00:37:31,106 --> 00:37:34,266
I'll tear you into eight pieces
and rearrange you into...
695
00:37:34,346 --> 00:37:36,466
sort of an octopus.
696
00:37:36,546 --> 00:37:37,866
Darling?
697
00:37:40,386 --> 00:37:41,466
Katya.
698
00:37:41,546 --> 00:37:43,106
Everything is OK?
699
00:37:43,186 --> 00:37:45,106
I hear men-voices and I scared.
700
00:37:45,186 --> 00:37:47,026
Just business talk, sugar-slit.
701
00:37:48,426 --> 00:37:51,586
Want you to meet our new friend
Jacques, Katya.
702
00:37:51,666 --> 00:37:52,866
Hello Jacques.
703
00:37:52,946 --> 00:37:54,426
It's pronounced "Jack".
704
00:37:58,666 --> 00:38:02,386
I think you should extend
Mr Coppaire the usual hospitality.
705
00:38:02,466 --> 00:38:03,786
Yes, darling.
706
00:38:03,866 --> 00:38:05,426
I don't need second-hand goods.
707
00:38:05,506 --> 00:38:07,146
Oi.
708
00:38:07,226 --> 00:38:10,986
Mr Macratty doesn't like having his
generosity slung back in his face.
709
00:38:11,066 --> 00:38:13,346
And I don't like it
rammed down my throat.
710
00:38:13,426 --> 00:38:15,746
No, but Katya does.
711
00:38:21,626 --> 00:38:22,786
Eh?!
712
00:38:27,026 --> 00:38:28,946
Go on, son.
713
00:38:29,026 --> 00:38:31,466
She gwan gobble yuh up
like rice and pea.
714
00:38:31,546 --> 00:38:33,746
Hm. She slurp yuh down to yuh
bone marrow,
715
00:38:33,826 --> 00:38:35,786
leave you wid hollow legs bwoy.
716
00:38:35,866 --> 00:38:36,866
Hear mi now?
717
00:38:36,946 --> 00:38:38,906
She gwan suck out all
the know-how in yuh brain,
718
00:38:38,986 --> 00:38:40,986
till yuh drooling inna cripple style
719
00:38:41,066 --> 00:38:43,986
like dem Diving Bell Butterfly,
Mistah Man.
720
00:38:44,066 --> 00:38:47,626
Yeah... That's enough Nigel.
This is a classy establishment.
721
00:38:47,706 --> 00:38:49,706
Let's go and listen to them do it.
722
00:38:49,786 --> 00:38:52,666
I wanna hear it going in
to see if he's a cop or not.
723
00:38:56,986 --> 00:38:58,026
Ahh...
724
00:38:58,106 --> 00:38:59,786
You don't have to do this.
725
00:38:59,866 --> 00:39:02,026
You don't have to do that.
726
00:39:02,106 --> 00:39:03,906
You don't have to touch those.
727
00:39:03,986 --> 00:39:05,346
I don't want to hear this.
728
00:39:05,426 --> 00:39:07,466
I'll cover it.
Leave me in here, if you like.
729
00:39:07,546 --> 00:39:09,826
Come, take off shirt.
730
00:39:12,506 --> 00:39:15,666
Just play with those for an hour,
that'll do me.
731
00:39:15,746 --> 00:39:20,186
I want to see what you
have under here.
732
00:39:21,746 --> 00:39:22,746
No.
733
00:39:24,346 --> 00:39:25,786
Why so shy? Why you...?
734
00:39:27,866 --> 00:39:29,066
What is this?
735
00:39:32,466 --> 00:39:33,666
Oh, my God.
736
00:39:33,746 --> 00:39:36,226
She must've found his cable.
737
00:39:36,306 --> 00:39:38,546
Jack? Jack?
738
00:39:38,626 --> 00:39:42,106
Jack? Jack? Jack?
739
00:39:42,186 --> 00:39:44,986
Jack? Jack?
740
00:39:45,066 --> 00:39:47,186
Jack? Jack?
741
00:39:53,546 --> 00:39:55,506
This... shaver with bullet in?
742
00:39:55,586 --> 00:39:57,106
It has sentimental value.
743
00:39:57,186 --> 00:39:58,786
Augh!
744
00:40:00,546 --> 00:40:02,386
I wondered why I put that in there.
745
00:40:05,346 --> 00:40:09,226
No, I'll keep my clothes on.
That's the way I like it.
746
00:40:09,306 --> 00:40:11,146
Complex body-image issues.
747
00:40:11,226 --> 00:40:15,786
OK. You stay dress
while do me up... like this.
748
00:40:15,866 --> 00:40:19,106
I don't think my old man
would approve.
749
00:40:19,186 --> 00:40:23,386
Jack! Jack! Jack! Jack!
750
00:40:23,466 --> 00:40:25,466
Jack! Jack!
751
00:40:25,546 --> 00:40:27,026
Look, I had quite a big breakfast.
752
00:40:27,106 --> 00:40:28,266
You must have me.
753
00:40:28,346 --> 00:40:30,506
Fried bread and everything, so...
Please.
754
00:40:30,586 --> 00:40:33,306
Mr Macratty he throws me
out on streets
755
00:40:33,386 --> 00:40:35,146
if I not satisfy his man-guests.
756
00:40:35,226 --> 00:40:37,826
Well, I'll just tell him I was
satisfied. They listen outside.
757
00:40:41,746 --> 00:40:43,946
We must have sex on here now.
758
00:40:48,146 --> 00:40:49,626
Jack! Jack!
759
00:40:49,706 --> 00:40:51,146
Augh... Jack!
760
00:40:51,226 --> 00:40:52,746
Wait... Bloody hell...
761
00:40:52,826 --> 00:40:53,906
He's turned on.
762
00:40:53,986 --> 00:40:58,346
Oh, yeah... Ah, ah... Ohh...
763
00:40:58,426 --> 00:41:01,666
Bloody hell, that's... Ohh...
Oh, God... Oh, yeah...
764
00:41:01,746 --> 00:41:04,586
You like bum and also buttock? Oh...
765
00:41:04,666 --> 00:41:08,266
Both halves of the bum are... great.
766
00:41:08,346 --> 00:41:12,746
Come round to front... OK...
Conventional orifice is nicer.
767
00:41:12,826 --> 00:41:14,706
Jack's forgotten which side he's on.
768
00:41:14,786 --> 00:41:16,146
Do you think she'll blow it?
769
00:41:16,226 --> 00:41:19,226
I...am... in... your...
770
00:41:19,306 --> 00:41:20,386
balls.
771
00:41:20,466 --> 00:41:21,426
He's in too deep.
772
00:41:21,506 --> 00:41:24,187
If he doesn't pull out soon there'll
be one hell of a mess in there.
773
00:41:24,266 --> 00:41:26,346
Oh... Oh... Oh...
774
00:41:36,466 --> 00:41:40,786
Oh, oh... Aah! Aah!
775
00:41:40,866 --> 00:41:42,186
Ohh! Aah!
776
00:41:42,266 --> 00:41:44,186
Ohhh.
777
00:41:50,866 --> 00:41:53,146
You're not like others, Jack.
778
00:41:53,226 --> 00:41:56,706
Most men do sex,
then turn over and snore
779
00:41:56,786 --> 00:41:58,786
and do guff stink from poo-pipe.
780
00:42:00,026 --> 00:42:01,666
You different.
781
00:42:01,746 --> 00:42:04,426
And you're too good for this.
I know.
782
00:42:04,506 --> 00:42:08,146
Mr Macratty ship me from homeland
inside big tin.
783
00:42:08,226 --> 00:42:12,786
He promise a good job as CEO
of Marks & Spencer with own car,
784
00:42:12,866 --> 00:42:17,426
health insurance and share options.
But when I get here...
785
00:42:19,306 --> 00:42:21,546
It only last nine years.
786
00:42:21,626 --> 00:42:25,506
Now he treat me like rubber dolly
full of air with mouth like this...
787
00:42:29,706 --> 00:42:31,786
I miss family back in Fokkraine.
788
00:42:34,346 --> 00:42:38,226
My little brother Lukaz he loss
eyesight working in egg mine.
789
00:42:38,306 --> 00:42:40,586
My mother go mad, grow beard.
790
00:42:42,466 --> 00:42:44,586
How they cope?
791
00:42:44,666 --> 00:42:48,426
Now Mr Macratty say museum job
very shocking and important,
792
00:42:48,506 --> 00:42:50,706
writer's not certain
this plot point quite clear,
793
00:42:50,786 --> 00:42:52,546
so they record me, say this later.
794
00:42:52,626 --> 00:42:55,306
That's why picture still on you
and not show me talk.
795
00:42:55,386 --> 00:42:57,626
Macratty also say
he kill anyone who get in way.
796
00:42:57,706 --> 00:42:59,106
I not know what to do.
797
00:43:02,586 --> 00:43:03,866
You am help me?
798
00:43:05,946 --> 00:43:07,306
I am help you.
799
00:43:07,386 --> 00:43:08,666
Thank you.
800
00:43:13,866 --> 00:43:16,346
Time... to die.
801
00:43:16,426 --> 00:43:19,146
We have Des Sergeant here,
vouched for by our man Coppaire.
802
00:43:19,226 --> 00:43:20,866
Des is the best shot on the force.
803
00:43:20,946 --> 00:43:23,746
And when I say "on the force,"
I mean "in the world of crime."
804
00:43:23,826 --> 00:43:25,346
We can't do this.
805
00:43:25,426 --> 00:43:26,706
You're injured.
806
00:43:26,786 --> 00:43:28,306
I'll bleed when I'm dead.
807
00:43:28,386 --> 00:43:29,946
That's not how blood works.
808
00:43:31,426 --> 00:43:34,426
Call the papers, tell them Mr Boss
has taken leave of his senses.
809
00:43:34,506 --> 00:43:35,746
You'll regret this.
810
00:43:35,826 --> 00:43:38,026
And that his breath
smells of quavers.
811
00:43:38,106 --> 00:43:41,466
Time to die... again.
812
00:43:41,491 --> 00:44:18,400
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