1
00:02:04,765 --> 00:02:09,525
Come on, Batman, it's Christmas Eve.
Let's kick back and get into the spirit.

2
00:02:09,907 --> 00:02:12,980
The Joker's escaped from
Arkham Asylum, Robin.

3
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:16,189
And you really think he's gonna
make his move on Christmas Eve?

4
00:02:16,585 --> 00:02:19,788
Even scum spend the holidays
with their families.

5
00:02:20,091 --> 00:02:22,520
He has no family.

6
00:02:22,794 --> 00:02:24,298
Okay, I'll make a deal with you.

7
00:02:24,532 --> 00:02:28,660
If we go out on patrol, and Gotham is
quiet with no sign of the Joker...

8
00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:33,813
<i>we come back here, have Christmas
dinner and watch It's a Wonderful Life.</i>

9
00:02:34,182 --> 00:02:38,823
You know, I've never seen that. I
could never get past the title.

10
00:02:39,257 --> 00:02:41,686
- It's a deal, then?
- Deal.

11
00:03:17,553 --> 00:03:21,747
Doesn't it warm your heart to see
everyone in the spirit of Christmas?

12
00:03:27,771 --> 00:03:29,852
Oh, bah humbug to you too.

13
00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:36,626
You just can't believe there's
no use for us for one night.

14
00:03:39,157 --> 00:03:41,303
There.

15
00:03:45,235 --> 00:03:46,902
Hey, lady, hold up.

16
00:03:47,170 --> 00:03:49,665
You dropped this package
a couple blocks back.

17
00:03:49,940 --> 00:03:53,971
Oh, it's for my grandson.
Thanks so much.

18
00:03:54,749 --> 00:03:57,374
Merry Christmas.

19
00:03:57,988 --> 00:04:00,897
Now can we go home?

20
00:04:03,298 --> 00:04:06,370
He could give
lessons to Scrooge.

21
00:04:10,309 --> 00:04:12,683
The Christmas goose
will be ready shortly.

22
00:04:13,348 --> 00:04:16,387
You know, we really should've
done one more sweep of the city.

23
00:04:16,853 --> 00:04:18,237
Now just relax, Bruce.

24
00:04:18,456 --> 00:04:21,179
<i>You're gonna love It's a Wonderful Life.
It's a great movie.</i>

25
00:04:21,996 --> 00:04:24,425
It's not relentlessly
cheerful, is it?

26
00:04:24,734 --> 00:04:28,994
No, it's about how much of a
difference one man can make to a city.

27
00:04:29,341 --> 00:04:31,716
Sound familiar?

28
00:04:37,087 --> 00:04:39,549
Wrong channel. Some kind
of Christmas special.

29
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:49,609
<i>It's a Wonderful Life will
not be seen this year.</i>

30
00:04:49,909 --> 00:04:52,731
<i>In its place is the following.</i>

31
00:04:53,014 --> 00:04:57,393
Joker here. Greetings,
Gotham, and merry Christmas.

32
00:04:57,754 --> 00:05:04,083
I hope you're watching, Batman.
This one's for you.

33
00:05:18,890 --> 00:05:23,563
<i>Live from Gotham City, the show
that nobody wants to see...</i>

34
00:05:23,933 --> 00:05:27,735
<i>but everyone will watch.</i>

35
00:05:36,654 --> 00:05:39,475
<i>Yes, it's Christmas
with the Joker!</i>

36
00:05:42,396 --> 00:05:44,542
<i>And now, let's
welcome our host...</i>

37
00:05:44,801 --> 00:05:50,074
<i>the clown prince of
crime, the Joker!</i>

38
00:05:50,476 --> 00:05:52,818
Greetings from Gotham City.

39
00:05:53,081 --> 00:05:58,713
<i>And welcome to the first annual
Christmas with the Joker.</i>

40
00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:03,109
Oh, thank you, thank you.

41
00:06:03,432 --> 00:06:06,308
Thank you very much.

42
00:06:06,603 --> 00:06:09,098
Have I got a show
for you tonight.

43
00:06:09,375 --> 00:06:14,049
It's loaded with surprises and
mystery guests and Christmas jeer.

44
00:06:14,450 --> 00:06:16,792
Well, Batman, you were sure
right about the Joker.

45
00:06:17,556 --> 00:06:19,419
Any leads?

46
00:06:19,659 --> 00:06:22,154
I've accessed Gotham's
electrical mainframe.

47
00:06:22,565 --> 00:06:24,645
And I'm zeroing in on
the power surges...

48
00:06:24,900 --> 00:06:28,354
to pinpoint the location of
Joker's broadcast signal.

49
00:06:28,675 --> 00:06:30,277
That's it.

50
00:06:30,510 --> 00:06:32,971
I don't know, Batman,
it seems too easy.

51
00:06:33,281 --> 00:06:35,678
It's never easy with the Joker.

52
00:06:35,986 --> 00:06:38,808
Oh, Batman, I hope
you're watching...

53
00:06:39,158 --> 00:06:44,213
<i>because I've got a very
special surprise for you.</i>

54
00:06:44,702 --> 00:06:50,301
Rumor has it, Christmas is a
time to share with family.

55
00:06:51,614 --> 00:06:55,677
And since I don't
have one of my own...

56
00:06:56,821 --> 00:07:01,015
I decided to steal one.

57
00:07:02,397 --> 00:07:07,615
And here they are, the
awful Lawful family.

58
00:07:08,273 --> 00:07:13,132
Aren't they just the cutest
family you've ever seen?

59
00:07:15,553 --> 00:07:17,895
It's never easy with the Joker.

60
00:07:18,491 --> 00:07:21,248
<i>Meet Daddy Lawful.</i>

61
00:07:22,564 --> 00:07:25,767
You diseased maniac, I'll...

62
00:07:26,070 --> 00:07:30,101
Looks like I'll have to
teach Daddy some manners.

63
00:07:30,444 --> 00:07:34,126
And here's Mommy Lawful.

64
00:07:34,450 --> 00:07:38,034
Help! Somebody please help us.
We...

65
00:07:38,391 --> 00:07:41,016
Ho, ho, ho. Isn't she jolly?

66
00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:44,978
And here we have
little Baby Lawful.

67
00:07:48,608 --> 00:07:52,191
When I get my hands on
you, I'll rip your...

68
00:07:52,782 --> 00:07:56,943
I'll bet Batman wishes he had
a family just like mine.

69
00:07:57,289 --> 00:08:01,483
Personally, I think relatives are a
bore, so Batman can have them...

70
00:08:01,830 --> 00:08:05,098
if he can find them by midnight.

71
00:08:05,937 --> 00:08:08,911
Otherwise...

72
00:08:14,351 --> 00:08:16,367
Hold tight, we're almost there.

73
00:08:16,821 --> 00:08:20,601
<i>Hi, I'm Laffy, Joker's
helpful little elf.</i>

74
00:08:21,028 --> 00:08:25,343
I'm here to present Batman with a
very special Christmas surprise.

75
00:08:25,736 --> 00:08:27,632
Here it comes.

76
00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:32,435
Gee, Joker, it's sure nice of you
to get Bat Breath a present.

77
00:08:33,617 --> 00:08:36,787
I'm just that kind of guy.

78
00:08:37,189 --> 00:08:40,740
It's an exact replica
of Gotham City.

79
00:08:41,096 --> 00:08:44,582
It has everything, even
trains and bridges.

80
00:08:44,936 --> 00:08:48,422
Bridges? I just love
blowing up bridges.

81
00:08:49,142 --> 00:08:55,156
Well, in that case, let's go live to Donner
and Blitzen at the President's Bridge.

82
00:08:55,887 --> 00:08:57,325
<i>Greetings, Donner.</i>

83
00:08:57,556 --> 00:09:01,587
<i>How about singing us a merry tune
while you blow up the bridge?</i>

84
00:09:01,931 --> 00:09:03,947
Sure, boss.

85
00:09:19,293 --> 00:09:21,058
That was great!

86
00:09:21,331 --> 00:09:23,476
The fun has just begun.

87
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:27,155
<i>The 11:30 train will
be along any minute.</i>

88
00:09:32,682 --> 00:09:34,098
We've gotta stop that train.

89
00:09:37,457 --> 00:09:42,414
Oh, look, Laffy, Mommy
Lawful has something to say.

90
00:09:43,100 --> 00:09:45,050
What's up, Mommy?

91
00:09:45,303 --> 00:09:48,179
- My mother's on that train.
- Your mother?

92
00:09:48,475 --> 00:09:51,232
Well, that's different, then.

93
00:09:51,514 --> 00:09:56,438
Yeah, it'll be even more
exciting when it crashes.

94
00:10:10,513 --> 00:10:14,892
You uncouple the passenger cars.
I'll get the engineer.

95
00:11:03,267 --> 00:11:04,770
The bridge is out. Come on.

96
00:11:27,475 --> 00:11:30,710
Bah humbug. I hate
Batman and Robin.

97
00:11:31,314 --> 00:11:33,972
Then let's get rid of them.

98
00:11:37,524 --> 00:11:41,805
Oh, boy, let's build a snowman.

99
00:11:44,670 --> 00:11:46,621
We isolated the Joker's
broadcast signal.

100
00:11:46,906 --> 00:11:50,774
It's coming from the
observatory on Mount Gotham.

101
00:12:03,634 --> 00:12:06,989
- There, the radar antenna.
- What's that?

102
00:12:09,378 --> 00:12:13,572
Careful, Robin. I'm sure there's
more to this than meets the eye.

103
00:12:15,855 --> 00:12:21,040
<i>Merry Christmas, Batman. I'm
so glad you could join us.</i>

104
00:12:21,798 --> 00:12:23,214
What's your game, Joker?

105
00:12:23,468 --> 00:12:27,270
<i>Oh, just a little holiday
entertainment, Batman.</i>

106
00:12:27,642 --> 00:12:32,087
I'm sure all the folks at home will
enjoy sharing this special occasion.

107
00:12:32,516 --> 00:12:37,734
<i>Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
live from the top of Mount Gotham...</i>

108
00:12:38,159 --> 00:12:41,264
the death of Batman.

109
00:12:49,412 --> 00:12:54,020
When you care enough to
send the very blast.

110
00:12:54,420 --> 00:13:00,303
We'll return in just a moment, but
first a word from our sponsor.

111
00:13:10,513 --> 00:13:15,306
Robin, try and get inside the observatory.
I'll draw its fire.

112
00:13:26,874 --> 00:13:30,676
Looks like we're experiencing
technical difficulty.

113
00:13:31,014 --> 00:13:34,249
But don't worry, folks,
we're still on the air.

114
00:13:34,587 --> 00:13:38,999
<i>Oh, no! Our cannon seems
to be out of control.</i>

115
00:13:39,428 --> 00:13:43,709
<i>Gotham City could be
in serious danger.</i>

116
00:14:20,732 --> 00:14:22,333
Batman, Robin here.

117
00:14:29,178 --> 00:14:31,739
Robin, Operation
Cause and Effect.

118
00:14:32,484 --> 00:14:34,499
Got you.

119
00:14:53,821 --> 00:14:55,804
- Batman?
- I'm fine.

120
00:14:56,091 --> 00:14:58,520
But we're not any closer to
finding Joker's hideout.

121
00:14:58,829 --> 00:15:03,567
- What's our next move?
- To be quite honest, I don't know.

122
00:15:07,643 --> 00:15:11,259
Batman, it's almost midnight.
We have to do something.

123
00:15:11,749 --> 00:15:16,641
It's up to the Joker now. Only a
miracle can save the hostages.

124
00:15:17,126 --> 00:15:19,338
<i>Where's that bat fella
and that Robin fella?</i>

125
00:15:19,596 --> 00:15:21,393
<i>They're gonna spoil
my Christmas.</i>

126
00:15:21,632 --> 00:15:23,909
<i>What's the matter? Can't
they figure anything out?</i>

127
00:15:24,338 --> 00:15:28,434
<i>Time's up. I'm rubbing
everybody out at midnight.</i>

128
00:15:28,778 --> 00:15:33,125
<i>But wait, we have another
present to open.</i>

129
00:15:33,487 --> 00:15:36,973
<i>Let's not keep Mommy
Lawful waiting.</i>

130
00:15:37,493 --> 00:15:40,815
<i>Too bad Batman is
such a party pooper.</i>

131
00:15:41,501 --> 00:15:46,109
<i>Maybe he doesn't know how to get here.
All dressed up with nowhere to go.</i>

132
00:15:47,409 --> 00:15:53,128
Well, I wonder what Mommy Lawful
is getting for Christmas.

133
00:15:54,522 --> 00:15:56,951
The suspense is killing me.

134
00:15:57,226 --> 00:16:00,080
Is it? Can it be?

135
00:16:00,365 --> 00:16:04,645
Oh, yes, it's a
Betty Blooper doll.

136
00:16:05,140 --> 00:16:08,561
And what do Better
Blooper dolls do?

137
00:16:08,879 --> 00:16:12,365
Why, you just wind them up...

138
00:16:13,253 --> 00:16:17,349
and they wreak havoc
on Gotham City.

139
00:16:20,967 --> 00:16:23,047
I haven't seen one of
those dolls in years.

140
00:16:23,303 --> 00:16:25,449
They don't make dolls
like that any more...

141
00:16:25,740 --> 00:16:29,738
not since the Laffco toy factory
went out of business 14 years ago.

142
00:16:31,918 --> 00:16:33,389
Third and Main, downtown.

143
00:17:08,979 --> 00:17:11,507
Look sharp, Robin.

144
00:17:29,782 --> 00:17:33,017
- Where's that music coming from?
- Good question.

145
00:17:42,334 --> 00:17:44,480
Look out!

146
00:18:06,977 --> 00:18:08,872
Stand ready. More on the way.

147
00:18:17,428 --> 00:18:19,803
Stand clear, Robin.

148
00:18:38,897 --> 00:18:41,206
They don't call you
"Batman" for nothing.

149
00:18:44,941 --> 00:18:47,086
Snipers!

150
00:19:05,541 --> 00:19:07,937
Where'd he go?

151
00:19:08,546 --> 00:19:10,594
There he is.

152
00:19:18,364 --> 00:19:20,314
What?

153
00:19:21,335 --> 00:19:23,318
Look out!

154
00:19:25,107 --> 00:19:27,602
I love you very much.

155
00:19:31,918 --> 00:19:33,553
Keep your eyes open
for the Joker.

156
00:19:34,523 --> 00:19:37,497
I'll save you the
trouble, Batman.

157
00:19:37,862 --> 00:19:43,265
Come and get your Christmas
present, or the kiddies get it.

158
00:19:44,139 --> 00:19:47,015
Let them go, Joker.
It's me you want.

159
00:19:47,544 --> 00:19:50,866
Merry Christmas, Batman.

160
00:19:53,821 --> 00:19:57,122
Well, go on, open it.

161
00:19:59,666 --> 00:20:03,859
- Don't do it, Batman!
- Easy, Robin.

162
00:20:17,595 --> 00:20:20,949
Oh, I can't stand it.

163
00:20:34,624 --> 00:20:36,258
Robin, take care of them.

164
00:20:43,973 --> 00:20:48,549
<i>Run, run as fast as you can You'll
not catch me, I'm the Jokerman.</i>

165
00:21:00,234 --> 00:21:02,184
Merry Christmas, Joker.

166
00:21:02,570 --> 00:21:05,228
Bah humbug.

167
00:21:13,588 --> 00:21:15,832
It was nice of Commissioner
Gordon to give you...

168
00:21:16,093 --> 00:21:18,490
<i>that recording of It's
a Wonderful Life.</i>

169
00:21:18,764 --> 00:21:20,976
And it is a wonderful life.

170
00:21:21,569 --> 00:21:24,771
It has its moments.

171
00:21:45,576 --> 00:21:47,918
Merry Christmas.