1
00:02:02,100 --> 00:02:04,034
Missed me.
2
00:02:05,203 --> 00:02:06,727
Hey!
3
00:02:10,275 --> 00:02:13,870
- Quick. More bullets.
- Sorry, pudding, that was the last clip.
4
00:02:14,046 --> 00:02:16,378
You know how expensive they are.
5
00:02:20,285 --> 00:02:22,219
Sounds like someone turned
off your cash flow.
6
00:02:22,387 --> 00:02:25,447
If it's a flow you want,
I'm happy to oblige.
7
00:02:33,732 --> 00:02:35,393
My eye!
8
00:02:38,837 --> 00:02:40,737
Sucker.
9
00:02:45,110 --> 00:02:46,737
Come on!
10
00:02:57,589 --> 00:03:00,080
Well, that was a
complete fiasco.
11
00:03:00,258 --> 00:03:03,750
If we weren't so strapped for cash,
I'd never have touched this job.
12
00:03:03,929 --> 00:03:07,194
- Give me the loot.
- Don't you have it?
13
00:03:07,699 --> 00:03:12,295
Me? You were the last one to... I
thought I told you to get gas!
14
00:03:12,471 --> 00:03:15,167
We're broke, remember? What
was I supposed to do...
15
00:03:15,340 --> 00:03:17,638
fill the tank, shoot
the guy and drive off?
16
00:03:20,012 --> 00:03:22,378
Now you tell me.
17
00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:29,485
Time to eject.
18
00:03:38,296 --> 00:03:43,563
- Hey, where's mine?
- Sorry, kiddo. I could only afford one.
19
00:03:43,735 --> 00:03:47,136
You cheap, penny-pinching,
pasty-faced creep!
20
00:03:47,572 --> 00:03:51,099
I'll get you for this,
you lousy tightwad!
21
00:03:59,718 --> 00:04:03,654
A letter came for you today, Mr.
Kerr.
22
00:04:03,822 --> 00:04:07,383
By the way, you're two
weeks late with your rent.
23
00:04:08,060 --> 00:04:10,119
Sue me.
24
00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:19,025
Alas, the bitter jest of fate.
25
00:04:19,204 --> 00:04:22,901
The once-mighty Joker without
two nickels to rub together.
26
00:04:27,245 --> 00:04:29,645
Yeah, yeah. You're
hungry, I'm hungry.
27
00:04:29,815 --> 00:04:32,875
Do me a favor and eat
each other, will you?
28
00:04:37,222 --> 00:04:40,282
"Dear sir, we regret to
inform you of the passing...
29
00:04:40,459 --> 00:04:43,087
of Mr. Edward, a.k.a.
"King" Barlowe..."
30
00:04:43,261 --> 00:04:44,956
There's good news. I hated him.
31
00:04:45,130 --> 00:04:48,861
"Who, in accordance with his last wishes,
has bequeathed to you the total...
32
00:04:49,367 --> 00:04:53,565
two hundred and fifty
million dollars."
33
00:04:57,409 --> 00:04:59,036
Good old King Barlowe.
34
00:04:59,211 --> 00:05:02,647
I take back almost all the nasty
things I ever said about him.
35
00:05:04,783 --> 00:05:10,415
Bud, Lou, our ship has come in, boys.
We're gonna spend, spend, spend.
36
00:05:10,789 --> 00:05:13,986
And I know just what
we'll buy first.
37
00:05:14,159 --> 00:05:17,424
If a man's filled with glee,
that man must go free.
38
00:05:17,863 --> 00:05:20,423
That was the scene outside
the city courthouse today...
39
00:05:20,599 --> 00:05:22,362
where, after weeks
of litigation...
40
00:05:22,534 --> 00:05:25,002
the Joker's criminal record
has been wiped clean...
41
00:05:25,170 --> 00:05:28,435
by his one-time gangland
rival, King Barlowe.
42
00:05:28,707 --> 00:05:32,973
As followers of this remarkable story
know, Gotham's most notorious criminal...
43
00:05:33,145 --> 00:05:37,013
was recently willed a huge fortune
in cash, jewels and gold.
44
00:05:37,182 --> 00:05:41,312
It doesn't make sense. King hated the
Joker, but he left him everything.
45
00:05:41,486 --> 00:05:45,684
I was King's bodyguard for 10
years, and he left me zip.
46
00:05:47,726 --> 00:05:50,388
Armed with his newfound wealth,
the Joker put together...
47
00:05:50,562 --> 00:05:54,623
a pricey defense team to polish his
less-than-sterling reputation.
48
00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:58,531
The Joker is not some animal
to be locked away in a cage.
49
00:05:58,703 --> 00:06:00,796
He's a thinking,
feeling human being.
50
00:06:02,674 --> 00:06:06,337
I subjected him to a thorough
psychological examination...
51
00:06:06,511 --> 00:06:09,275
assessing his subconscious
reflex responses...
52
00:06:09,447 --> 00:06:11,881
to the most provocative
of stimuli.
53
00:06:12,050 --> 00:06:15,611
And I can safely say he
is a criminal no more.
54
00:06:15,787 --> 00:06:20,121
How do you respond to charges that Joker
is simply bribing his way to freedom?
55
00:06:20,292 --> 00:06:23,352
I won't even dignify
that with a response.
56
00:06:26,097 --> 00:06:30,329
And there you have it. At this hour,
the Joker is not only a free man...
57
00:06:30,502 --> 00:06:32,800
- but a wealthy one.
- There's justice for you.
58
00:06:33,405 --> 00:06:37,205
Well, now that he's rich,
maybe he'll give up crime.
59
00:06:37,509 --> 00:06:39,909
Right. I'll call Dick.
60
00:06:44,883 --> 00:06:46,578
You sure the Joker's inside?
61
00:06:46,751 --> 00:06:48,878
Penguin's throwing him
a "going legit" party.
62
00:06:49,054 --> 00:06:50,851
Sorry, we're full up tonight.
63
00:06:55,393 --> 00:06:59,921
Gee, you'd never think Penguin would turn
away the police commissioner's daughter.
64
00:07:00,098 --> 00:07:05,161
Egad, Gordon's brat. My dear Miss
Gordon, how nice to see you.
65
00:07:05,337 --> 00:07:10,104
Welcome, have fun. And by all
means, send the bill to me.
66
00:07:10,275 --> 00:07:14,336
- Thank you, Mr. Cobblepot.
- Lousy little freeloader.
67
00:07:42,107 --> 00:07:46,703
- What's the scheme this time, Joker?
- No scheme at all, old bird.
68
00:07:46,878 --> 00:07:49,711
I'm free, I'm rich
and I'm loving it.
69
00:07:49,881 --> 00:07:53,544
I'm sure old Batboy is
eating his heart out.
70
00:07:54,753 --> 00:07:57,881
Living well is the best revenge.
71
00:08:08,767 --> 00:08:10,325
All set?
72
00:08:12,237 --> 00:08:14,467
Let's do it.
73
00:08:17,475 --> 00:08:18,908
Everybody down!
74
00:08:23,648 --> 00:08:25,878
Not you, clown.
75
00:08:26,851 --> 00:08:29,479
I should have been the one
to get Barlowe's money.
76
00:08:29,654 --> 00:08:33,215
At least I'll make sure
you'll never enjoy it.
77
00:08:37,662 --> 00:08:41,120
I hope you've made out
your will, Joker.
78
00:09:07,258 --> 00:09:09,852
Well done, kiddies.
79
00:09:10,328 --> 00:09:14,128
We were trying to save innocent lives.
You're just an unpleasant bonus.
80
00:09:15,567 --> 00:09:19,128
Be that as it may, your grateful
Uncle Joker wants to thank you.
81
00:09:19,304 --> 00:09:22,364
Here, stick this in
your piggy banks.
82
00:09:30,281 --> 00:09:33,273
Let the good times roll!
83
00:10:47,926 --> 00:10:50,394
You're pathetic, you know that?
84
00:10:50,562 --> 00:10:53,963
Come on, Red. So Mr. J got a
little stressed over money.
85
00:10:54,132 --> 00:10:57,226
Now that he's loaded, pudding
will buy my way out too.
86
00:10:57,402 --> 00:11:00,303
Oh, yeah, right.
Sure thing, Harl.
87
00:11:00,472 --> 00:11:03,873
"Joker seeks new henchgirl"?
88
00:11:06,411 --> 00:11:08,140
I'll kill him!
89
00:11:12,951 --> 00:11:16,148
Hey, boss. Why didn't you buy
Harley a ticket out of the bin too?
90
00:11:16,521 --> 00:11:19,422
Now, now, Ernie. Mustn't
be too extravagant.
91
00:11:19,624 --> 00:11:23,060
Besides, it's cheaper
to hire a new one.
92
00:11:23,995 --> 00:11:25,724
Too fat.
93
00:11:26,631 --> 00:11:28,599
Too small.
94
00:11:29,267 --> 00:11:30,996
Too old.
95
00:11:37,041 --> 00:11:38,508
No.
96
00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:43,404
Darn!
97
00:11:53,691 --> 00:11:57,491
Drown the kids and shoot the neighbors.
We've got a winner.
98
00:11:58,363 --> 00:12:03,232
Thank you, Mr. G. I promise
I'll be the best Harley ever.
99
00:12:03,635 --> 00:12:05,500
Maybe I should've
hired the fat guy.
100
00:12:05,937 --> 00:12:08,929
Ernie, take fake Harley here
and show her the ropes.
101
00:12:09,107 --> 00:12:12,770
- You got it.
- This job has a 401 (k) plan, right?
102
00:12:12,944 --> 00:12:15,674
- Sure.
- Excuse me, Mr. Joker.
103
00:12:15,847 --> 00:12:20,648
Sorry, the henchgirl role has been filled.
And quite nicely too.
104
00:12:21,753 --> 00:12:25,587
Oh, no, sir. I'm not here for a job.
My name is Perry.
105
00:12:25,790 --> 00:12:29,590
- I'm from the Internal Revenue Service.
- Oh, yes.
106
00:12:29,794 --> 00:12:31,921
Seems I've heard of that
little organization.
107
00:12:32,096 --> 00:12:35,031
Then you must realize, as Mr.
Barlowe's sole beneficiary...
108
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:37,430
you owe us a tidy bit
of inheritance tax.
109
00:12:37,602 --> 00:12:43,302
Now, 250 million minus Uncle Sam's
current state and federal percentages...
110
00:12:45,310 --> 00:12:47,744
This should clear
up your account.
111
00:12:52,150 --> 00:12:53,947
A hundred and
thirty-seven million?
112
00:12:54,118 --> 00:12:57,451
Yes, and if I don't pay up, I'll
go to jail for tax evasion.
113
00:12:57,889 --> 00:13:03,384
I'm crazy enough to take on Batman.
But the IRS? No, thank you.
114
00:13:06,798 --> 00:13:12,031
- Hey, Mr. G, this money looks weird.
- What do you mean?
115
00:13:13,137 --> 00:13:17,540
It's a plain old pack of hundreds. See?
There's Ben Franklin's chubby little...
116
00:13:17,709 --> 00:13:20,143
What? King Barlowe?
117
00:13:23,081 --> 00:13:27,882
- He's on this stack. And this one.
- He's on every one of these thousands.
118
00:13:28,286 --> 00:13:31,687
- I don't understand.
- Hey, boss.
119
00:13:33,458 --> 00:13:35,358
I found this.
120
00:13:37,528 --> 00:13:40,190
Hiya, Joker. If you're
playing this tape...
121
00:13:40,365 --> 00:13:42,731
you probably figured
out you've been had.
122
00:13:42,900 --> 00:13:45,300
Yeah, I left you some cash,
but only 10 million...
123
00:13:45,470 --> 00:13:47,563
which, knowing you,
you've already blown.
124
00:13:47,739 --> 00:13:53,473
All the other stuff, money,
jewels and gold, it's all fake.
125
00:13:54,212 --> 00:13:58,239
See? I always hated your guts, and
this was the perfect payback.
126
00:13:58,516 --> 00:14:01,076
By now you're probably
out of real money.
127
00:14:01,252 --> 00:14:04,915
The IRS is after you. And you
can't admit I fooled you...
128
00:14:05,089 --> 00:14:08,320
or you'll be the laughingstock
of the underworld.
129
00:14:08,493 --> 00:14:13,726
The joke's on you, sucker. I
got the last laugh after all.
130
00:14:36,387 --> 00:14:39,083
If I don't pay my taxes,
I'll go to jail...
131
00:14:39,257 --> 00:14:41,919
but if I admit Barlowe duped
me, I'll look like a fool.
132
00:14:42,093 --> 00:14:44,994
You could raise cash by pulling
one of your classic routines.
133
00:14:45,163 --> 00:14:48,132
- Like them laughing fish.
- Good idea, Ernie.
134
00:14:48,299 --> 00:14:53,896
Let's let Batman know I did it so he can
kick my keister right back into Arkham.
135
00:14:57,642 --> 00:14:59,166
Dope.
136
00:15:01,379 --> 00:15:06,749
- Fake Harley, any ideas?
- Anything you say, Mr. G.
137
00:15:11,322 --> 00:15:12,880
No, boss!
138
00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:18,318
Who'd ever think I'd
miss the real one?
139
00:15:20,531 --> 00:15:22,761
Harley Quinn's escaped!
140
00:15:24,402 --> 00:15:27,735
- Seal all exits!
- Maybe she went down the laundry chute.
141
00:15:27,905 --> 00:15:31,068
None of these yahoos are crazy
enough to pull that old stunt.
142
00:15:32,009 --> 00:15:36,002
Help, help! Ivy! Anybody!
Get me out of here!
143
00:15:39,117 --> 00:15:43,577
My dear Mr. Wayne, I'm delighted
to have you in my humble nest.
144
00:15:43,755 --> 00:15:46,189
I thought I'd take
in the atmosphere.
145
00:15:48,559 --> 00:15:53,121
Well, well, Bruce Wayne. Join me.
A bottle of your best, my dear.
146
00:15:53,297 --> 00:15:56,596
- For my guest.
- You'll understand if I refuse.
147
00:15:56,768 --> 00:15:59,703
The last time we met, you tried
to throw me off a building.
148
00:16:00,071 --> 00:16:04,701
I did? Well, that
was so long ago.
149
00:16:04,876 --> 00:16:06,707
It was last month.
150
00:16:16,687 --> 00:16:19,212
Well, gotta be going.
151
00:16:24,495 --> 00:16:27,089
This is starting to get to me.
152
00:16:28,599 --> 00:16:30,624
Should have used
more makeup, Ernie.
153
00:16:32,804 --> 00:16:35,739
Why the disguise, Ernie?
Where is he?
154
00:16:35,907 --> 00:16:39,502
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- He can't threaten my guests.
155
00:16:39,677 --> 00:16:43,477
- Let me jog your memory.
- No!
156
00:17:03,301 --> 00:17:05,531
Armored car one, report.
157
00:17:05,703 --> 00:17:09,730
Routine money disbursal from
Gotham Mint proceeding as planned.
158
00:17:10,208 --> 00:17:12,642
Good. Your police
escort is waiting.
159
00:17:39,170 --> 00:17:41,035
Stop!
160
00:17:55,119 --> 00:17:57,110
No laughing gas, no grins...
161
00:17:57,288 --> 00:18:00,416
no way Batboy can trace
this back to me.
162
00:18:06,297 --> 00:18:08,788
Hey, keep the boat in the water.
163
00:18:08,966 --> 00:18:11,799
This definitely wasn't
in the job description.
164
00:18:23,915 --> 00:18:27,180
It's been so long since
I've seen the real thing.
165
00:18:27,351 --> 00:18:31,481
Hello, Ben, George, Abe.
166
00:18:36,093 --> 00:18:38,186
No!
167
00:18:58,282 --> 00:19:00,216
No! My fortune!
168
00:19:14,332 --> 00:19:16,698
Don't be stupid. You
can't save that money.
169
00:19:16,968 --> 00:19:21,701
I don't want to save it,
I want to go with it.
170
00:19:27,545 --> 00:19:30,275
You'd better call
your fancy lawyers.
171
00:19:30,448 --> 00:19:31,915
Here.
172
00:19:34,719 --> 00:19:36,243
It's on me.
173
00:19:39,624 --> 00:19:43,287
Honest, they told me
it was an Equity gig.
174
00:19:55,172 --> 00:19:57,572
Okay, get him out of here.
175
00:19:59,276 --> 00:20:02,245
After all, it's only money.
176
00:20:03,314 --> 00:20:06,306
So I'll let the taxpayers
foot my bill again.
177
00:20:06,484 --> 00:20:09,476
Besides, it'll be nice
to see the old gang.
178
00:20:09,654 --> 00:20:12,418
One of them's dying to
see you too, pudding.
179
00:20:12,590 --> 00:20:15,320
- Harley?
- The one and only.
180
00:20:15,493 --> 00:20:18,758
You... You don't know how
happy I am to see you.
181
00:20:18,929 --> 00:20:21,591
Welcome to the club.
182
00:20:24,101 --> 00:20:28,060
Now, baby, I can explain.
183
00:21:00,438 --> 00:21:02,429
[ENGLISH]