﻿1
00:00:05,630 --> 00:00:13,630
[PETER FRAMPTON'S
DO YOU FEEL LIKE WE DO? PLAYS]

2
00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:20,894
OOH, OOH! I JUST WANTTO HEAR
THE GUITAR SOLO ONE MORE TIME.

3
00:00:21,062 --> 00:00:24,023
NOT AGAIN. USE THE HEADPHONES.

4
00:00:27,193 --> 00:00:30,320
GOOD. NOW, WRAP THE
CORD AROUND YOUR NECK.

5
00:00:32,615 --> 00:00:35,826
HEY, WOULD YOU GUYS RESPECT ME
IF I WORKED IN THE TOWN DUMP?

6
00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:38,120
THE TOWN DUMP, NO.

7
00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:40,581
NOW, THE STATE DUMP...

8
00:00:41,791 --> 00:00:43,042
WHY ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A JOB?

9
00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:46,670
EVERYTHING COSTS MONEY:
GAS, CLOTHES...

10
00:00:46,838 --> 00:00:47,588
FUN.

11
00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:50,049
DATES. DATES COST MONEY.

12
00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:53,886
NO, KELSO, THAT IS PROSTITUTION.

13
00:00:56,639 --> 00:00:58,223
DATING IS PROSTITUTION, MAN,

14
00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:01,977
ONLY YOU DON'T ALWAYS
GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR.

15
00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:04,938
SAID THE MAN WHO'S
NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND.

16
00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:08,275
WHAT, YOU GUYS DON'T REMEMBER
ESTHER, THE BIKER CHICK?

17
00:01:08,443 --> 00:01:09,735
HEY, WHATEVER HAPPENED TO HER?

18
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:12,571
SHE'S DATING MY UNCLE.

19
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,199
WELL, I'M GOING HOME FOR DINNER.

20
00:01:15,366 --> 00:01:16,533
OH, BY THE WAY, MOM AND DAD

21
00:01:16,701 --> 00:01:19,912
ARE GOING TO THE PLAYBOY CLUB
AT LAKE GENEVA THIS WEEKEND.

22
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,663
DO YOU GUYS WANT SOUVENIRS?

23
00:01:21,831 --> 00:01:22,539
OOH, ASHTRAYS.

24
00:01:22,707 --> 00:01:24,625
A WOMAN.

25
00:01:26,127 --> 00:01:28,253
YOUR PARENTS ARE GONNA
BE OUT OF TOWN?

26
00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:29,421
REALLY?

27
00:01:29,547 --> 00:01:32,299
YEAH I MEAN, I'LL BE BABYSITTING
MY SISTER TINA ALL WEEKEND.

28
00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:33,675
JUST ME...

29
00:01:33,843 --> 00:01:35,260
ALONE...

30
00:01:35,428 --> 00:01:37,638
WATCHING TV.

31
00:01:37,806 --> 00:01:40,557
I MIGHT ORDER A PIZZA.

32
00:01:40,725 --> 00:01:43,852
I GOT AN IDEA!

33
00:01:44,020 --> 00:01:45,687
WE'LL HAVE A PARTY AT DONNA'S,

34
00:01:45,855 --> 00:01:47,523
A TOGA PARTY!

35
00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:49,274
MICHAEL? MICHAEL,

36
00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,693
MAYBE DONNA DOESN'T
WANT TO THROW A PARTY.

37
00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:53,070
MAYBE SHE WANTS TO BE ALONE.

38
00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:55,906
YEAH, JUST ME, ALONE.

39
00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:59,451
IF SOMEONE HAPPENS TO STOP BY,
THAT'D BE PRETTY COOL.

40
00:01:59,619 --> 00:02:02,538
SO WE'RE ON.
I'LL BRING THE BEER!

41
00:02:02,705 --> 00:02:06,959
DONNA, I NEVER BEEN TO AN
AMERICAN PARTY. MAY I COME?

42
00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,418
UM, UH, YEAH, I DON'T CARE.

43
00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:11,505
UH, SO, UH, ERIC, ARE YOU
GONNA BE THERE?

44
00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:12,881
YEAH, YEAH, SOUNDS FUN.

45
00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:15,425
COOL. CATCH YOU GUYS LATER.

46
00:02:15,593 --> 00:02:17,386
WHOO-HOO-HOO!

47
00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:18,846
PARTY AT DONNA'S!

48
00:02:19,013 --> 00:02:21,515
YOU ARE BOTH SO STUPID!

49
00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:24,685
OW! WHY?

50
00:02:27,313 --> 00:02:32,234
WELL, THIS IS A FIRST.
I ACTUALLY AGREE WITH JACKIE.

51
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,528
WHAT, YOU'RE SAYING
THAT I'M STUPID?

52
00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,405
DONNA JUST PUT ON
THE FULL-CORE PRESS, MAN,

53
00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:37,739
AND YOU DROPPED THE BALL.

54
00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:38,991
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

55
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,410
ALL SHE SAID WAS THAT
SHE'D BE ALONE SATURDAY NIGHT

56
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:42,161
WITH A PIZZA...

57
00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,538
OH, GOD, I'M SO STUPID.

58
00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:51,587
♪ HANGIN' OUT ♪

59
00:02:51,754 --> 00:02:55,299
♪ DOWN THE STREET ♪

60
00:02:55,466 --> 00:02:59,011
♪ THE SAME OLD THING ♪

61
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:02,347
♪ WE DID LAST WEEK ♪

62
00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:06,643
♪ NOT A THING TO DO ♪

63
00:03:06,811 --> 00:03:09,730
♪ BUT TALK TO YOU ♪

64
00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:12,316
♪ WHOA, YEAH! ♪♪

65
00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:14,234
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY CARSEY-WERNER
PRODUCTIONS AND FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY

66
00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:17,362
HELLO, WISCONSIN!

67
00:03:23,786 --> 00:03:26,496
SO DAD, THE GUYS AND I
ARE THINKING ABOUT GETTING JOBS.

68
00:03:26,664 --> 00:03:28,832
NO, NO, NO. YOU HAVE A JOB.

69
00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,543
IT'S YOUR JOB TO GET GOOD
GRADES, GO TO COLLEGE, GRADUATE,

70
00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:34,796
AND LEAVE ME.

71
00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:37,424
KITTY, WHEN I WAS HIS AGE,
I WORKED IN A SLAUGHTER HOUSE.

72
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:39,468
IT WAS A GOOD EXPERIENCE.

73
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:43,096
I LEARNED HOW TO USE A HAMMER.

74
00:03:52,315 --> 00:03:54,733
UH, THE NEW FATSO BURGER
IS HIRING PEOPLE.

75
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:58,362
JACKIE'S DAD OWNS IT.
I GUESS I COULD GET A JOB THERE.

76
00:03:58,529 --> 00:04:00,656
THERE IS PLENTY OF TIME
LATER TO GET A JOB,

77
00:04:00,823 --> 00:04:04,660
TO GRIND THE JOY
OUT OF YOUR LIFE.

78
00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:06,119
IT'S NEVER TOO EARLY.

79
00:04:06,287 --> 00:04:07,621
BUT LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.

80
00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:12,125
WORK IS NOT ABOUT FUN,
IT'S ABOUT WORK.

81
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:15,879
IT'S ABOUT SEEING HOW MUCH CRAP
YOU CAN TAKE FROM THE BOSS MAN,

82
00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:18,799
AND THEN, TAKING SOME MORE.

83
00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:23,345
AND REMEMBER... HEY, LOOK AT ME.

84
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:27,641
ONLY QUITTERS QUIT.

85
00:04:27,809 --> 00:04:30,185
SO, CAN I WORK?

86
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:33,772
WELL, WE'RE SURE AS HELL
GONNA FIND OUT NOW, AREN'T WE?

87
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,652
SO, BIG PARTY SATURDAY NIGHT.

88
00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:41,446
WHOOPEE!

89
00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:44,324
I CAN'T BELIEVE FORMAN
MISSED ALL OF THOSE SIGNALS.

90
00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:46,535
WHAT SIGNALS?

91
00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:48,287
[FEMININE VOICE]
"OH, NO, POOR ME,

92
00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:51,581
"ALL ALONE IN MY BIG HOUSE.

93
00:04:51,749 --> 00:04:55,294
"JUST ME AND MY NIGHTIE.

94
00:04:55,461 --> 00:05:02,676
IF ONLY THERE WAS SOME SCRAWNY
LITTLE NEIGHBOR BOY HERE."

95
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:04,928
HE'S NOT SCRAWNY.

96
00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:06,930
YOU KNOW, WHY AM I
EVEN TALKING TO YOU?

97
00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:09,182
I'M ALL YOU GOT.

98
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:12,352
OH, MY GOD! SO EVERYBODY KNOWS.

99
00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:14,271
I'M AFRAID SO.

100
00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:16,982
I JUST WANT TO SPEND
SOME TIME WITH HIM ALONE,

101
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:18,817
AND NOW I CAN'T.

102
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:22,988
HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL?

103
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,532
FRUSTRATED.
IT'S AS FRUSTRATING AS HELL.

104
00:05:25,700 --> 00:05:28,285
I MEAN, I REALLY
PUT MYSELF OUT THERE.

105
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:32,456
I SEE, AND DO YOU HAVE
TROUBLE SLEEPING AT NIGHT?

106
00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:34,458
SOMETIMES, YEAH, I DO.

107
00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:35,625
DO YOU THINK YOU'D SLEEP BETTER

108
00:05:35,793 --> 00:05:38,920
IF YOU HAD A SCRAWNY LITTLE
NEIGHBOR BOY UP NEXT TO YOU?

109
00:05:41,549 --> 00:05:44,176
OK, LET'S HEAR IT.

110
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,624
HELLO, MY NAME IS ERIC FORMAN...

111
00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:49,431
NO, NO, NO, NO, NOT WITH
A LOOSE HAND, FIRM, YOU KNOW,

112
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:53,477
NOT LIKE A FISH. AGAIN.

113
00:05:53,644 --> 00:05:54,394
HELLO, MY NAME IS ERIC...

114
00:05:54,562 --> 00:05:57,272
NO, STEP INTO IT, HUH?

115
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,815
STAND UP STRAIGHT.

116
00:05:58,983 --> 00:06:02,277
STRAIGHT UP AND HOLD THE FISH.

117
00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:07,908
DON'T BE A SMART MOUTH.

118
00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:12,245
RIGHT, NO... NO SMART MOUTH.

119
00:06:12,413 --> 00:06:15,999
HELLO, MY NAME IS ERIC FORMAN.

120
00:06:16,167 --> 00:06:19,419
AND?

121
00:06:19,587 --> 00:06:21,213
OH, OH, OH, UM,

122
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,840
TELL THEM ABOUT YOUR JUNIOR
ACHIEVEMENT EXPERIENCE.

123
00:06:24,008 --> 00:06:27,594
OH, THEY COULD GIVE
A RAT'S ASS ABOUT THAT.

124
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:31,473
OK, UM, SHOW THEM YOUR HONORABLE
MENTION FROM THE SCIENCE FAIR.

125
00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:32,432
AGAIN...

126
00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,810
RIGHT, RAT'S ASS.

127
00:06:36,437 --> 00:06:38,188
DON'T SLOUCH!

128
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:41,316
WOULDN'T THAT FALL UNDER THE
"STAND UP STRAIGHT" CATEGORY?

129
00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:46,279
YOU SEE, THAT'S A SMART MOUTH.

130
00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:50,033
YOU'RE FIRED, MR. SMART MOUTH!

131
00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:53,537
SEE, THAT'S HOW THAT WORKS.

132
00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:01,378
Man: FIRST OF ALL,

133
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:04,673
PEOPLE WHO WORK
AT FATSO BURGER ARE SPECIAL.

134
00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,508
NOW, I KNOW YOU'RE LOOKING AT ME
AND WONDERING,

135
00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:09,886
"HOW DO I GET WHERE RICKY IS?"

136
00:07:10,054 --> 00:07:12,431
WELL, IF YOU WORK HARD,
PAY ATTENTION,

137
00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:14,599
AND USE THE PROPER
FINGER RELEASE TECHNIQUE

138
00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:19,646
ON THE SNAP CUP DISPENSER,
YOU COULD BE ME.

139
00:07:19,814 --> 00:07:21,773
NOW, LET'S GET STARTED.

140
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:24,860
WHY DO YOU WANT A CAREER
AT FATSO BURGER?

141
00:07:25,027 --> 00:07:27,404
I JUST THINK IT WILL
BE A WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE.

142
00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:29,156
MY GIRLFRIEND'S DAD OWNS IT.

143
00:07:29,323 --> 00:07:31,324
I LOVE THE UNIFORMS.

144
00:07:31,492 --> 00:07:34,661
TO UNIONIZE THE WORKERS, MAN.

145
00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:39,207
TELL ME, WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER
YOUR BEST QUALITY?

146
00:07:39,375 --> 00:07:41,626
WELL, I'M A REAL PEOPLE PERSON.

147
00:07:41,794 --> 00:07:44,004
I DON'T ANSWER STUPID QUESTIONS.

148
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:45,964
I SPEAK DUTCH.

149
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:48,842
MY EYES. OH...

150
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:52,179
AND, I GUESS MY BUTT, TOO.

151
00:07:54,348 --> 00:07:55,508
NAME SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF

152
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:59,186
THAT YOU CONSIDER
TO BE A WEAKNESS.

153
00:07:59,353 --> 00:08:02,105
I ALLOW PEOPLE
TO BOSS ME AROUND.

154
00:08:02,273 --> 00:08:04,107
I LOVE CHOCOLATE.

155
00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:08,195
I'M BRUTALLY HONEST... PINHEAD.

156
00:08:08,362 --> 00:08:11,990
UM...

157
00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:16,203
WHERE DO YOU SEE
YOURSELF IN 5 YEARS?

158
00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:18,121
FATSO BURGER.

159
00:08:18,289 --> 00:08:20,957
COVERED IN GOLD CHAINS.

160
00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:22,334
A ROCK STAR...

161
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:26,338
UH, NO, MOVIE STAR.

162
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:27,839
NO...

163
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:30,675
YEAH, ROCK STAR.

164
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:33,512
PRISON.

165
00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:39,935
WELL, I'D LIKE TO THANK YOU ALL
VERY MUCH FOR COMING IN.

166
00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:44,022
ERIC, WELCOME TO THE
FATSO BURGER FAMILY.

167
00:08:45,942 --> 00:08:47,776
♪ OH, YEAH ♪

168
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,821
OH, DADDY, I'M SO SAD.

169
00:08:51,989 --> 00:08:52,989
WHY, KITTEN?

170
00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:55,534
BECAUSE FATSO BURGER HIRED
ERIC INSTEAD OF MICHAEL.

171
00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:56,743
I KNOW, KITTEN.

172
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:59,454
WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT, DADDY?

173
00:08:59,622 --> 00:09:02,999
LET ME TELL YOU A LITTLE STORY
ABOUT DOOFUS AND DILIGENT.

174
00:09:05,753 --> 00:09:09,047
DOOFUS IS FRIENDLY, BUT HE
DOESN'T FOLLOW DIRECTIONS WELL.

175
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:12,342
NOW, DILIGENT ALWAYS
DOES HIS JOB BY THE BOOK.

176
00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:14,052
THIS IS HOW THE BOOK
SAYS TO DO IT:

177
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:17,806
"WIPE LEFT TO RIGHT."

178
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:20,976
UH-OH! LOOKS LIKE
A BIG ORDER JUST CAME IN.

179
00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:23,770
"LET ME HELP, GUYS,"
SAYS DILIGENT.

180
00:09:23,938 --> 00:09:26,690
"BUT WAIT A SEC.
WHERE'S DOOFUS?"

181
00:09:34,824 --> 00:09:37,075
WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?

182
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:39,411
LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS HERE.

183
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:42,664
"UH-OH, I WAS IN SUCH
A HURRY TO GET BACK TO WORK,

184
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,958
I ALMOST FORGOT."

185
00:09:45,126 --> 00:09:47,294
THAT-A-BOY, DILIGENT.

186
00:09:47,461 --> 00:09:48,878
"HEY, THERE, DOOFUS,

187
00:09:49,046 --> 00:09:52,382
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WASH YOUR
HANDS AFTER USING THE FACILITY."

188
00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:54,551
"HA! NO WAY, DILIGENT.

189
00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:58,680
THAT'S FOR SQUARES."

190
00:10:01,642 --> 00:10:04,019
SO MICHAEL'S A DOOFUS?

191
00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:06,396
AND HOW.

192
00:10:07,523 --> 00:10:09,691
WE EXPECT YOU TO BE RESPONSIBLE
WHEN WE'RE OUT OF TOWN.

193
00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:10,859
NO PARTIES.

194
00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:12,319
AND I WANT YOU TO BE
NICE TO YOUR SISTER.

195
00:10:12,486 --> 00:10:15,488
DON'T MAKE TINA EAT DIRT.
I MEAN IT.

196
00:10:15,656 --> 00:10:18,366
AND NO BOYS.
THEY ONLY WANT ONE THING.

197
00:10:18,534 --> 00:10:22,621
IT'S A DIRTY, DIRTY
THING THEY WANT.

198
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:24,080
ENOUGH SAID.

199
00:10:24,248 --> 00:10:25,665
HEY, LOOKING SHARP, ERIC.

200
00:10:25,833 --> 00:10:26,833
YOU GONNA BE AROUND
THIS WEEKEND?

201
00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:28,001
Y GOOD. R.

202
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:31,463
MAKE SURE NO GUYS ARE
HANGING AROUND DONNA, CAPISCE?

203
00:10:34,550 --> 00:10:35,550
SO I GOT A JOB.

204
00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:36,343
YEAH?

205
00:10:36,510 --> 00:10:39,179
YEAH. IT SEEMS I'M REALLY
FATSO BURGER MATERIAL,

206
00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:42,098
AND I REALLY WISH
I HADN'T JUST SAID THAT.

207
00:10:42,266 --> 00:10:44,225
NO, IT SOUNDED COOL.

208
00:10:45,519 --> 00:10:47,145
UM... AHEM...

209
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:51,107
SO, UH, ARE YOU STILL COMING
TO THE PARTY ON SATURDAY?

210
00:10:51,275 --> 00:10:54,694
UH, WELL, I WORK LATE ON
SATURDAY NIGHT, BUT, UH...

211
00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:58,782
I MEAN, IF I GET OFF EARLY,
I'D LIKE, UH, SWING BY.

212
00:10:58,949 --> 00:11:01,117
SOUNDS GOOD.

213
00:11:01,285 --> 00:11:03,912
YEAH. BUT, I MEAN,
IT MIGHT BE REALLY LATE.

214
00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:08,917
SO EVERYONE ELSE MIGHT BE GONE.

215
00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:11,169
WELL, UM, YOU KNOW,
IF I'M STILL UP,

216
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:14,464
I COULD LEAVE THE LIGHT ON,
IF YOU WANT ME TO?

217
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,925
OH, YEAH... NO, I MEAN, YEAH,

218
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,552
THAT... THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

219
00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:21,179
'CAUSE THAT WAY,

220
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:23,973
WITH THE LIGHT ON,
I COULDN'T... FALL.

221
00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:27,060
YEAH.

222
00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:27,852
OK.

223
00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:28,478
YEAH.

224
00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:29,145
OK.

225
00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:29,854
SOUNDS GOOD.

226
00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:30,480
OK.

227
00:11:30,648 --> 00:11:31,981
YEAH.

228
00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:35,652
HEY, DONNA?

229
00:11:35,820 --> 00:11:36,361
UM, THAT LIGHT?

230
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:36,986
YEAH.

231
00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:37,612
COOL.

232
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,656
OK.

233
00:11:42,451 --> 00:11:43,451
BYE, MOM.

234
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:45,495
OH, HEY, ERIC, I'M GOING TO
THE RESERVOIR. YOU WANNA GO?

235
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:47,997
NOPE. I GOTTA WORK.

236
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:51,459
HEY, ERIC, I MEETING EVERYONE
AT THE HUB. YOU WANNA GO?

237
00:11:51,627 --> 00:11:53,586
NOPE. I GOTTA WORK.

238
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,508
HEY, ERIC, I'M GOING TO
SEE A MOVIE. YOU WANNA GO?

239
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:59,551
NOPE. I GOTTA WORK.

240
00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:02,345
HEY, ERIC,
I JUST GOT THIS NEW BIKINI,

241
00:12:02,513 --> 00:12:03,593
BUT I THINK IT'S TOO SMALL.

242
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:04,723
COME MODEL IT FOR YOU?

243
00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,808
NOPE. I GOTTA WOOO...

244
00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:08,935
[WHIMPERS]

245
00:12:11,355 --> 00:12:13,940
HEY, HOW'S THAT
MOPPING COMING ALONG?

246
00:12:14,108 --> 00:12:18,445
WELL, I'M JUST HAPPY TO BE PART
OF THE FATSO BURGER FAMILY...

247
00:12:18,612 --> 00:12:20,405
YOU DUMB ASS.

248
00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:39,174
HEAR, HEAR,
MY MINIMUM-WAGED FRIEND,

249
00:12:39,341 --> 00:12:41,384
I DEMAND SERVICE.

250
00:12:41,552 --> 00:12:45,221
WELCOME TO FATSO BURGER.
HOW MAY I SERVE YOU?

251
00:12:45,389 --> 00:12:48,391
THAT IS SO SAD, BURGER BOY.

252
00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:51,060
YOU KNOW, JACKIE,
I'VE BEEN WRACKING MY BRAIN

253
00:12:51,228 --> 00:12:53,396
TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
WHY THIS GUY DIDN'T HIRE ME.

254
00:12:53,564 --> 00:12:55,440
MICHAEL, I AM SO
TIRED OF HEARING THAT.

255
00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:56,691
YOU STILL HAVE ME.

256
00:12:56,859 --> 00:12:57,984
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK IT IS?

257
00:12:58,152 --> 00:12:59,152
WHAT?

258
00:12:59,236 --> 00:13:02,030
I'M GREAT-LOOKING,
AND HE'S JEALOUS.

259
00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:05,158
I'M TELLING YOU, JACKIE,
THIS BODY IS A CURSE!

260
00:13:07,578 --> 00:13:10,330
WELL, BESIDES,
IF YOU WORKED HERE,

261
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:14,626
YOU COULDN'T SEE ME
WHENEVER I WANTED YOU TO...

262
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,920
LOVER.

263
00:13:17,087 --> 00:13:19,672
OH, YEAH!

264
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,675
PLEASE STOP TOUCHING
EACH OTHER...

265
00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:25,386
IT GIVES ME NEEDS.

266
00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:32,977
ARE YOU READY TO ROCK 'N ROLL?

267
00:13:40,277 --> 00:13:45,406
TOGA! TOGA! TOGA...

268
00:13:45,574 --> 00:13:50,370
HEY, MAN, NICE DRESS.

269
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:53,039
YOU BROUGHT THREE BEERS,
MEAT HEAD?

270
00:13:53,207 --> 00:13:56,709
WE'LL... WE'LL SHARE.

271
00:13:56,877 --> 00:13:59,462
HERE'S TO OUR WASTED YOUTH, HUH?

272
00:14:01,257 --> 00:14:02,799
PARTY.

273
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:08,805
HEY, FEZ.

274
00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:09,973
GOOD EVENING, DONNA.

275
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:13,226
WHICH OF THESE LADIES ARE EASY?

276
00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:17,021
DONNA, SOME OF YOUR CREEPY
FRIENDS ARE USING DAD'S STEREO.

277
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:19,607
YOU GUYS, NO ONE'S
ALLOWED IN THE HOUSE.

278
00:14:19,775 --> 00:14:21,734
HELLO, PRETTY LADY.

279
00:14:21,902 --> 00:14:23,361
HI. HA HA.

280
00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:26,823
SHE'S NOT A PRETTY LADY,
SHE'S MY SISTER, AND SHE'S 14.

281
00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:28,241
YOU KNOW, IN MY COUNTRY...

282
00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:30,535
IT'S ILLEGAL HERE.

283
00:14:32,913 --> 00:14:35,790
OH, I SEE.

284
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,293
MICHAEL,

285
00:14:38,460 --> 00:14:40,461
YOU AND I NEED TO TALK...

286
00:14:40,629 --> 00:14:43,214
INSIDE.

287
00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:45,216
OK.

288
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:48,303
I'M MISERABLE. THIS PARTY SUCKS.

289
00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:50,346
YOU KNOW WHAT WILL
MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?

290
00:14:50,514 --> 00:14:52,765
A SCRAWNY LITTLE NEIGHBOR BOY.

291
00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:54,293
WHY DON'T YOU TAKE OFF,
GO SEE HIM,

292
00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:55,393
I'LL WATCH THE KIDS, HUH?

293
00:14:55,436 --> 00:14:58,396
YEAH? THANKS, HYDE.

294
00:14:58,564 --> 00:15:01,149
[BELCHES] YOU'RE WELCOME.

295
00:15:09,366 --> 00:15:14,203
WELCOME TO FATSO BURGER.
HOW MAY I SERVE YOU?

296
00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:15,580
HONEY, IT'S ME.

297
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,624
I KNOW. I HAVE TO SAY THAT.

298
00:15:17,791 --> 00:15:20,126
OH! OH, OK.

299
00:15:20,294 --> 00:15:21,628
WELL, I WAS ON A BREAK
FROM THE HOSPITAL,

300
00:15:21,795 --> 00:15:24,005
SO I THOUGHT I'D BRING
YOU SOME NICE HOT SOUP.

301
00:15:24,173 --> 00:15:25,548
OH...

302
00:15:25,716 --> 00:15:26,966
OYSTER CRACKERS.

303
00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:30,762
OH, THANK GOD, SOMETHING TO EAT.

304
00:15:32,014 --> 00:15:33,014
SO HOW'S IT GOING?

305
00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:34,641
IT'S GREAT.

306
00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:35,892
SO HOW'S IT GOING?

307
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:36,726
IT'S TERRIBLE.

308
00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:38,311
MM-HMM.

309
00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:40,813
I'M EXHAUSTED, I'M BEHIND ON
ALL MY HOMEWORK,

310
00:15:40,981 --> 00:15:42,301
AND I THINK THIS
POLYESTER UNIFORM

311
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:44,651
IS GIVING ME A BODY RASH.

312
00:15:44,818 --> 00:15:47,654
OH, OH, UM, I SWEPT
THE DRIVEWAY FOR YOU.

313
00:15:47,821 --> 00:15:50,073
OH! OH, MOM, I'M SORRY.
I FORGOT.

314
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:51,824
THAT'S OK. YOU KNOW WHAT?
HERE, I'LL DO THIS.

315
00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:54,494
YOU SIT DOWN,

316
00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:59,082
AND YOU EAT YOUR SOUP.

317
00:15:59,249 --> 00:16:01,334
YOU KNOW, UM,

318
00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:02,961
ERIC, IF YOU WANT TO QUIT,

319
00:16:03,128 --> 00:16:06,756
YOUR FATHER AND I
WILL COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND.

320
00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:08,257
DID DAD TELL YOU THAT?

321
00:16:08,425 --> 00:16:10,009
WELL, YOU LEAVE
YOUR FATHER TO ME.

322
00:16:10,177 --> 00:16:12,053
YOU JUST WORRY ABOUT YOU.

323
00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:14,764
HEY, FORMAN,
WHO SAID YOU WERE ON BREAK?

324
00:16:14,932 --> 00:16:15,723
I DID.

325
00:16:15,891 --> 00:16:17,141
AND WHO ARE YOU?

326
00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:18,434
I'M HIS MOTHER.

327
00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:20,353
GOOD ENOUGH THEN.

328
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:27,402
MICHAEL, SIT. WE NEED TO TALK.

329
00:16:27,569 --> 00:16:29,278
WHOA. HA HA.

330
00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,864
AHOY, JACKIE.
WELCOME ABOARD THE U.S.S. KELSO.

331
00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:33,574
HA HA HA.

332
00:16:33,742 --> 00:16:35,660
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES
I'M BEGINNING TO THINK

333
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:39,038
YOU'RE A REAL SCREWUP.

334
00:16:39,206 --> 00:16:41,791
YOU SEE, ONE DAY,
I WANT A HOUSE AND KIDS

335
00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:43,710
AND MAYBE A CHANDELIER.

336
00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:46,004
AND IF YOU CAN'T GIVE ME
THOSE THINGS, MICHAEL,

337
00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:48,131
THEN THIS IS ALL
A BIG WASTE OF TIME.

338
00:16:50,592 --> 00:16:52,969
YOU JUST GOTTA TRY HARDER.

339
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,850
WAIT. MICHAEL,
SOMETHING FEELS WET.

340
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:02,145
Michael, thinking:
"DEAR PENTHOUSE..."

341
00:17:02,312 --> 00:17:05,273
NO, NO! YOU POPPED THE WATERBED!

342
00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:11,195
IT MUST HAVE BEEN MY ROACH CLIP.

343
00:17:11,363 --> 00:17:16,409
WELL, JACKIE, MAYBE
THEY WON'T NOTICE.

344
00:17:16,577 --> 00:17:20,288
I AM IN LOVE WITH A DOOFUS.

345
00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:26,002
HEY.

346
00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:27,170
DONNA?

347
00:17:27,171 --> 00:17:30,715
OH, UH, WELCOME TO FATSO BURGER.
HOW... AH, SCREW IT.

348
00:17:31,759 --> 00:17:32,550
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

349
00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:35,303
OH, I WAS BORED. AHEM.

350
00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:39,098
REALLY? YOU LEFT YOUR OWN PARTY
TO COME SEE ME?

351
00:17:39,266 --> 00:17:42,727
IT'S NOT MUCH OF A PARTY
WITHOUT YOU THERE.

352
00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:45,938
YOU'RE SO QUEER.

353
00:17:45,939 --> 00:17:48,858
SHUT UP!

354
00:17:49,026 --> 00:17:50,026
UM...

355
00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:52,028
ERIC, THE WHOLE REASON I TOLD
YOU MY PARENTS WERE GOING AWAY

356
00:17:52,196 --> 00:17:55,198
IS SO WE COULD HANG...

357
00:17:55,365 --> 00:17:56,783
TOGETHER,

358
00:17:56,950 --> 00:17:58,743
YOU KNOW, ALONE.

359
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,495
YEAH.

360
00:18:02,831 --> 00:18:04,791
I KNOW, IT'S JUST, UH...

361
00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,173
SO, UM...

362
00:18:14,802 --> 00:18:17,845
LOOK, DONNA, I'M SORRY.

363
00:18:18,013 --> 00:18:19,213
OK, I WOULD LOVE TO COME OVER,

364
00:18:19,306 --> 00:18:21,808
BUT THIS IS MY JOB.

365
00:18:21,975 --> 00:18:26,062
AND, UH,
WORK ISN'T FUN, YOU KNOW?

366
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:29,148
IT'S WORK.

367
00:18:29,316 --> 00:18:33,152
AND ONLY QUITTERS QUIT.

368
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,322
WELL, AS LONG AS YOU
KNOW WHAT'S IMPORTANT.

369
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:39,909
I'LL, UM, SEE YOU AROUND.

370
00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:54,841
OW!

371
00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:03,099
WELL, WHAT DO YOU KNOW,
KELSO, WE'RE OUT OF BEER.

372
00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:05,518
YOU KNOW WHAT?
FORMAN'S OLD MAN'S GOT A FRIDGE

373
00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:07,645
IN THE GARAGE,
AND I KNOW HE'S GOT BEER IN IT.

374
00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:12,942
[CRASH]

375
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:20,741
AAH! AAH!

376
00:19:21,535 --> 00:19:23,786
IT WAS HIS IDEA!

377
00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:30,626
REMIND ME TO KICK YOUR ASS.

378
00:19:30,794 --> 00:19:32,753
UH, HEY, RED.

379
00:19:32,921 --> 00:19:34,589
UM, UH,

380
00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:36,257
IS FORMAN AROUND?

381
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:41,179
WELL, HE SURE AS HELL
IS NOT INSIDE THAT FRIDGE.

382
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:52,315
MR. PINCIOTTI, YOU'RE HOME.

383
00:19:52,482 --> 00:19:53,858
GOOD.

384
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:56,027
UH, CAME BACK EARLY.

385
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,945
AH, MISS THE KIDS TOO MUCH.

386
00:19:58,113 --> 00:19:59,947
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

387
00:20:00,115 --> 00:20:02,867
OH, UH, I WAS JUST
COMING HOME FROM WORK,

388
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,787
AND I NOTICED THAT SOMEONE
LEFT YOUR PORCH LIGHT ON.

389
00:20:06,955 --> 00:20:08,915
YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE
THAT FROM YOUR HOUSE.

390
00:20:09,082 --> 00:20:10,625
GOOD EYE.

391
00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:11,876
THANK YOU.

392
00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:14,170
YOU KNOW, ERIC, THAT'S
WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU.

393
00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:15,578
I ASK YOU TO LOOK OUT FOR DONNA,

394
00:20:15,589 --> 00:20:17,381
AND HERE YOU ARE
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT

395
00:20:17,549 --> 00:20:22,887
HANGING AROUND THE BACK DOOR
DOING YOUR JOB.

396
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:24,180
YOU'RE A GOOD GUY, ERIC.

397
00:20:24,348 --> 00:20:27,225
I DON'T CARE WHAT
THEY SAY ABOUT YOU.

398
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:28,392
HA! GOTCHA!

399
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,478
HA HA HA HA HA!
AH, GOOD NIGHT NOW.

400
00:20:30,646 --> 00:20:31,562
OK, WELL, I WAS JUST GONNA...

401
00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:32,313
YEAH, THERE YOU GO.

402
00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:33,856
OK.

403
00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:40,446
GOOD NIGHT, THEN.

404
00:20:40,614 --> 00:20:42,406
Donna: GOOD NIGHT, ERIC.

405
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:54,126
DAD.

406
00:20:54,294 --> 00:20:55,044
ERIC.

407
00:20:55,212 --> 00:20:57,255
DAD, I'M QUITTING MY JOB.

408
00:20:57,422 --> 00:20:58,839
YOU'RE QUITTING?

409
00:20:59,007 --> 00:21:01,384
YEAH, I'M QUITTING.

410
00:21:01,551 --> 00:21:03,678
I'M IRRESPONSIBLE,
I'M A QUITTER,

411
00:21:03,845 --> 00:21:06,305
AND I COULDN'T KILL
A COW WITH A HAMMER.

412
00:21:06,473 --> 00:21:07,556
SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT?

413
00:21:07,724 --> 00:21:09,444
WELL, EVERYBODY QUITS
THEIR FIRST JOB, ERIC.

414
00:21:09,601 --> 00:21:12,770
IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

415
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:14,647
WHAT?

416
00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:17,483
THAT'S IT?

417
00:21:17,651 --> 00:21:20,236
I GOTTA SAY, DAD,
I'M A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED HERE.

418
00:21:22,030 --> 00:21:23,656
I MEAN, IT WASN'T
A MAN'S JOB ANYWAY.

419
00:21:23,824 --> 00:21:24,532
RED.

420
00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,575
WELL, COME ON, KITTY,
IT WAS A HAIR NET,

421
00:21:26,743 --> 00:21:31,872
NAMETAG, NOTHING KIND OF A JOB.

422
00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:34,250
NOW, THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.

423
00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:35,751
IT'S JUST AS WELL.

424
00:21:35,919 --> 00:21:37,837
IT WAS CUTTING INTO
YOUR CHORES ANYWAY.

425
00:21:38,005 --> 00:21:41,090
YOU DID A HALF-ASSED JOB
SWEEPING THE DRIVEWAY.

426
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:45,636
I THOUGHT HE DID
A WONDERFUL JOB.

427
00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:48,139
DIDN'T LOOK WONDERFUL TO ME.

428
00:21:48,974 --> 00:21:51,183
OK, THEN...

429
00:21:51,351 --> 00:21:54,395
SWEEP IT YOURSELF.

430
00:21:56,898 --> 00:21:58,816
HEY, HEY, HEY, FORMAN,

431
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:03,863
WHERE'S THAT BIG FATSO SMILE?

432
00:22:04,031 --> 00:22:05,871
RICKY, HOW'D YOU START
WORKING AT FATSO BURGER?

433
00:22:05,949 --> 00:22:08,409
OH, GREAT STORY. I WAS
GONNA GO TO COLLEGE,

434
00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:09,827
BUT THEN THEY MADE ME
ASSISTANT MANAGER,

435
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:12,204
JUST THREW THE MONEY AT ME,
SO I NEVER GOT TO GO.

436
00:22:12,372 --> 00:22:13,789
BUT NOW I'M MY OWN BOSS.

437
00:22:13,957 --> 00:22:16,917
WELL, THAT'S NOT TRUE,
I ANSWER TO A LOT OF PEOPLE.

438
00:22:19,338 --> 00:22:21,255
OK, I QUIT NOW.

439
00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:22,298
OH, YEAH, I CERTAINLY WOULD.

440
00:22:22,466 --> 00:22:24,300
YEAH.

441
00:22:24,468 --> 00:22:25,926
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY CARSEY-WERNER
PRODUCTIONS AND FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY

442
00:22:26,094 --> 00:22:27,553
CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE
NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.

443
00:22:27,721 --> 00:22:31,401
PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT
PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE

