﻿1
00:00:03,420 --> 00:00:05,546
♪ JUST SIT RIGHT BACK
AND YOU'LL HEAR A TALE ♪

2
00:00:05,714 --> 00:00:07,673
♪ A TALE OF FATEFUL TRIP ♪

3
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:09,883
♪ THAT STARTED
FROM THIS TROPIC PORT ♪

4
00:00:10,051 --> 00:00:12,344
♪ ABOARD THIS TINY SHIP ♪

5
00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:14,888
♪ THE MATE
WAS A MIGHTY SAILIN' MAN ♪

6
00:00:15,056 --> 00:00:16,640
♪ THE SKIPPER
BRAVE AND SURE... ♪♪

7
00:00:16,808 --> 00:00:17,975
OW! GET OFF ME, MOOSE!

8
00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:20,019
OH, GOD, ERIC, I DIDN'T
SEE YOU SITTING THERE.

9
00:00:20,186 --> 00:00:22,813
YOU REALLY SHOULD
WORK ON BULKING UP.

10
00:00:26,276 --> 00:00:29,194
OH! AAH!

11
00:00:32,532 --> 00:00:34,366
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING?

12
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:36,660
HEY, "GILLIGAN" IS ON.

13
00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:38,567
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE FLOOR?

14
00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:40,205
YEAH, WHY DON'T
YOU GUYS GET A ROOM?

15
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:41,540
WE HAVE A ROOM, HYDE.

16
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:44,668
IT'S CALLED MY BASEMENT.

17
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WELL, I'M GOING HOME.

18
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:52,217
BYE, GUYS.

19
00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:53,552
OH, SO, DONNA, DON'T FORGET:

20
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:55,680
I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW NIGHT
AT THE LIBRARY, RIGHT?

21
00:00:55,764 --> 00:00:56,930
YEAH, RIGHT.

22
00:00:57,098 --> 00:00:58,265
I'LL WALK YOU HOME.

23
00:00:58,433 --> 00:00:59,683
SHE LIVES RIGHT NEXT DOOR, MAN.

24
00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:01,685
YEAH.

25
00:01:01,853 --> 00:01:03,020
DONNA.

26
00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:04,354
UM...

27
00:01:04,522 --> 00:01:05,689
ABOUT TOMORROW NIGHT.

28
00:01:05,857 --> 00:01:08,358
I WAS THINKING THAT MAYBE YOU
AND I COULD GO OUT TO DINNER

29
00:01:08,526 --> 00:01:09,735
FOR VALENTINE'S DAY.

30
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:13,405
OH, HYDE ASKED ME
TO STUDY AT THE LIBRARY.

31
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,699
WELL, I MEAN, YOU CAN
DO THAT ANY TIME, RIGHT?

32
00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:20,245
UM... YEAH.
YEAH, I'D LOVE TO GO. MM-HMM.

33
00:01:20,413 --> 00:01:21,955
THAT'S GREAT. UM...

34
00:01:22,123 --> 00:01:23,582
SO, THEN IT'S, UH...

35
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IT'S A DATE.

36
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OUR FIRST.

37
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YEAH.

38
00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:30,422
IF YOU DON'T COUNT
ALL THE TIMES I MAULED YOU.

39
00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:31,757
YEAH. UM...

40
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WHICH I DON'T. SO, ALL RIGHT.

41
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:38,347
HEY, GUYS.

42
00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:42,226
SO...

43
00:01:42,393 --> 00:01:45,020
WHAT'S GOING ON?

44
00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:48,732
I'LL, UH... TALK
TO YOU GUYS LATER.

45
00:01:50,985 --> 00:01:53,695
SO, ERIC...

46
00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:56,240
WHAT WERE YOU AND DONNA TALKING
ALL HOT AND HEAVY ABOUT?

47
00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,033
YOUR HAIR. REALLY?

48
00:01:58,201 --> 00:02:00,119
NO.

49
00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:01,703
WE'RE GOING OUT
TO DINNER TOMORROW NIGHT.

50
00:02:01,871 --> 00:02:03,705
FOR VALENTINE'S DAY.

51
00:02:03,873 --> 00:02:07,292
UH... NO, NO, NO.

52
00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:08,860
DONNA AND I
ARE GOING TO THE LIBRARY

53
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,254
TO STUDY TOMORROW NIGHT.

54
00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:12,965
ON VALENTINE'S DAY?
WHO STUDIES ON VALENTINE'S DAY?

55
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:14,773
WELL, I DIDN'T KNOW
IT WAS VALENTINE'S DAY

56
00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:18,220
WHEN I MADE THE DATE.

57
00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:20,139
TO STUDY.

58
00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:22,307
WELL, I'M SURE
SHE JUST FORGOT ABOUT YOU.

59
00:02:22,475 --> 00:02:24,893
WE JUST TALKED ABOUT IT
A MINUTE AGO!

60
00:02:25,061 --> 00:02:28,147
WOMEN, YOU KNOW.

61
00:02:28,314 --> 00:02:30,440
ANYWAY, UH...

62
00:02:30,608 --> 00:02:32,109
I'M GOING TO GIVE
DONNA MY CLASS RING.

63
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,945
[GASPS]

64
00:02:36,197 --> 00:02:37,489
NO. FORGET RINGS.

65
00:02:37,657 --> 00:02:38,817
YOU WANT TO SCORE WITH DONNA,

66
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,952
USE MY SUPER FUNK 8-TRACK.

67
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:44,204
ANYWAY, I FIGURE
IT'S TIME TO MAKE IT OFFICIAL.

68
00:02:44,372 --> 00:02:46,092
I MEAN, SHE'S JUST BEEN WAITING
FOR ANY JERK

69
00:02:46,207 --> 00:02:47,207
TO SWOOP DOWN ON HER.

70
00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:49,626
AND YOU'RE THAT JERK.

71
00:02:49,794 --> 00:02:52,004
WELL, BETTER ME
THAN SOME OTHER JERK.

72
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:55,424
WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME?
HYDE IS THE OTHER JERK.

73
00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:59,761
♪ HANGIN' OUT ♪

74
00:02:59,929 --> 00:03:03,557
♪ DOWN THE STREET ♪

75
00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:07,186
♪ THE SAME OLD THING ♪

76
00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:10,647
♪ WE DID LAST WEEK ♪

77
00:03:10,815 --> 00:03:14,568
♪ NOT A THING TO DO ♪

78
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:17,946
♪ BUT TALK TO YOU ♪

79
00:03:18,114 --> 00:03:20,199
♪ OH, YEAH ♪♪

80
00:03:20,366 --> 00:03:22,806
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
CARSEY-WERNER AND FOX BROADCASTING

81
00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:25,537
HELLO, WISCONSIN!

82
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,337
SO...

83
00:03:33,504 --> 00:03:35,297
ERIC AND DONNA ARE GOING OUT
SATURDAY NIGHT.

84
00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:38,884
THAT MEANS WE HAVE NO WHEELS.

85
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:41,345
WELL, I CAN BORROW MY DAD'S CAR.

86
00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:43,305
WHOA...

87
00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:46,850
IT'S A LINCOLN; LEATHER.

88
00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,258
OH! YOU KNOW WHAT WE SHOULD DO?

89
00:03:48,269 --> 00:03:52,606
WE SHOULD DITCH HYDE AND FEZ
AND MAKE OUT IN THE BACK SEAT.

90
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:55,776
YOU SAID THAT OUT LOUD.

91
00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:58,570
YEAH, I DON'T CARE.

92
00:03:58,738 --> 00:04:02,407
HEY, YEAH, I KNOW.
WE CAN GO SHOPPING FOR CLOGS.

93
00:04:03,868 --> 00:04:06,286
PICK ME UP AT 7:00.

94
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:09,373
YEAH, WELL,
HAVE FUN, MAN. I'M OUT.

95
00:04:09,540 --> 00:04:11,667
OH, WE WON'T BE SHOPPING.

96
00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:13,001
WE'LL BE DOING IT.

97
00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:15,754
AGAIN.

98
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:17,089
'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT WE DO.

99
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:21,677
WE DO IT!

100
00:04:21,844 --> 00:04:25,722
THEN I'M IN.

101
00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:30,227
UHH... NO.

102
00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,729
YOU'RE NOT INVITED, FEZ.

103
00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:36,400
OH. THEN I'M OUT.

104
00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:37,609
YEAH.

105
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:40,028
WELL, LATER.

106
00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:45,409
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S JUST
YOU AND ME, LITTLE BUDDY.

107
00:04:45,576 --> 00:04:47,286
YEAH, FEZ, WHICH
IS REALLY WRONG, MAN,

108
00:04:47,453 --> 00:04:49,121
'CAUSE I HAD PLANS WITH DONNA

109
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,456
UNTIL FORMAN SNAKED ME.

110
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:52,708
HUH! WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT

111
00:04:52,875 --> 00:04:54,435
SHE WOULD RATHER GO
TO A NICE RESTAURANT

112
00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:59,923
THAN A SMELLY OLD LIBRARY?

113
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:04,594
YOU WILL LAUGH LATER.

114
00:05:07,682 --> 00:05:09,474
SO... LET ME SEE.

115
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:12,311
GO AHEAD. SHOW YOUR MOTHER.

116
00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:20,986
OH, MY GOSH, THAT IS SNAZZY.

117
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:24,156
THAT IS A SNAZZY JACKET.

118
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,564
DAMN GOOD THING I WENT WITH HIM.

119
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:27,951
HE WANTED TO BUY A LEISURE SUIT.

120
00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:29,559
COME ON, DAD,
LEISURE SUITS ARE COOL.

121
00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:30,620
EVERYBODY WEARS THEM.

122
00:05:30,788 --> 00:05:32,164
LEISURE SUITS
ARE FOR DUMB ASSES,

123
00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:34,082
BELIEVE ME.

124
00:05:34,250 --> 00:05:36,626
HEY, THERE!

125
00:05:36,794 --> 00:05:39,463
WHOA, LOOKING SHARP
FOR YOUR BIG DATE, HUH?

126
00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:41,923
OH, WHO KNEW
OUR TWO LITTLE TYKES

127
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:44,676
WOULD GROW UP TO BE DATING?

128
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,678
OH, NO. I HAVE AN IDEA.

129
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:49,348
LET'S HAVE DINNER TOMORROW
NIGHT, JUST THE PARENTS.

130
00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:52,768
I'LL FONDUE. AH-HA HA HA!

131
00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:54,478
YES, AND THAT'LL
GIVE US A CHANCE

132
00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:56,146
TO TALK ABOUT THEIR FUTURE.

133
00:05:56,314 --> 00:05:57,898
OH, RIGHT...

134
00:05:58,066 --> 00:06:00,776
WE CAN PLAN A BIG WEDDING.

135
00:06:00,943 --> 00:06:02,486
I KNOW YOU'RE JOKING, BUT, UH...

136
00:06:02,653 --> 00:06:04,863
COULD YOU PLEASE STOP?

137
00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:08,075
[EVERYONE TALKING]

138
00:06:15,541 --> 00:06:23,541
♪♪♪

139
00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:26,385
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU, MICHAEL.

140
00:06:26,552 --> 00:06:27,719
WHAT?

141
00:06:27,887 --> 00:06:31,390
YOU CAN'T JUST MAUL ME
IN FRONT OF MY FATHER.

142
00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:33,934
I BET HE DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE.

143
00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:37,229
HE YELLED AT YOU TO STOP IT.

144
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:38,563
OH.

145
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:42,317
I THOUGHT HE WAS TALKING TO YOU.

146
00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:44,736
OKAY, MICHAEL,

147
00:06:44,904 --> 00:06:46,613
WE HAVE A PROBLEM.

148
00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:48,281
EVER SINCE WE...

149
00:06:48,449 --> 00:06:49,741
WE...

150
00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:52,244
DID IT?

151
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:55,622
CAN YOU PLEASE USE
A MORE BEAUTIFUL TERM?

152
00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:57,374
LIKE WHAT?

153
00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:59,000
WELL, LIKE...

154
00:06:59,168 --> 00:07:01,753
"PROVED OUR LOVE."

155
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:05,924
YEAH, BUT "DID IT"
SOUNDS SO MUCH COOLER.

156
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:08,468
OKAY, JUST TAKE ME TO THE MALL.

157
00:07:08,636 --> 00:07:11,471
WE'RE NOT REALLY
GOING SHOPPING, ARE WE?

158
00:07:11,639 --> 00:07:14,266
YES. I NEED CLOGS.

159
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,268
OH.

160
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,769
GOSH DARN!

161
00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:20,939
THAT IS A SNAZZY JACKET!

162
00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:22,232
YES, SIR.

163
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:25,402
BROWN IS YOUR COLOR.

164
00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:26,903
THANKS, DAD.

165
00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:30,949
UH, NO, NO, NO, MOM, NO, NO.

166
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,492
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING:

167
00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:34,077
ORDER THE DINNER.

168
00:07:34,245 --> 00:07:36,121
A LA CARTE'S A SUCKER'S BET.

169
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,290
AND REMEMBER:

170
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:39,958
PULL THE CHAIR OUT FOR HER,

171
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:42,210
THE SMALL FORK IS FOR THE SALAD,

172
00:07:42,378 --> 00:07:43,670
AND THIS JACKET'S
GOT TO LAST YOU

173
00:07:43,838 --> 00:07:45,005
ALL THE WAY THROUGH COLLEGE,

174
00:07:45,173 --> 00:07:48,091
SO DON'T SPILL ANY CRAP ON IT.

175
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,384
HERE YOU GO.

176
00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:50,802
HAVE FUN.

177
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:54,598
OH... AHH...

178
00:07:59,061 --> 00:08:00,145
SHALL WE?

179
00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:02,272
GOOD GOD, YES!

180
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:03,440
OH! SMILE!

181
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:06,568
OH, NOW IF SHE GETS
TO DO IT, I GET TO DO IT!

182
00:08:15,786 --> 00:08:17,162
WOW! TALK ABOUT PRESSURE, HUH?

183
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,831
YEAH. I MEAN,
THIS IS A HUGE DEAL.

184
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:23,126
TO OUR PARENTS.

185
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:25,337
[MUSIC ON RADIO] ♪ MOVE
IT IN, MOVE IT OUT ♪

186
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,173
♪ SHOVE IT IN, PULL IT OUT ♪

187
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:32,677
♪ DISCO LADY ♪

188
00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:34,679
♪ YOU'VE GOT ME SO SET ♪

189
00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:36,848
♪ HERE IN THIS DISCOTHEQUE ♪

190
00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:39,518
♪ YEAH, YOU'RE MOVING ME ♪

191
00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:42,270
SO WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

192
00:08:42,438 --> 00:08:44,078
I DON'T KNOW, MAN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

193
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,398
OH, LET'S GO TO THE HUB.

194
00:08:45,566 --> 00:08:49,194
I GOT MY EYE ON THIS PLUMP GIRL.

195
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:51,780
SOUNDS GOOD, MAN, BUT I'LL PASS.

196
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,282
POOR HYDE.

197
00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:55,450
WHAT?

198
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:58,245
YOU LOVE DONNA, AND SHE'S
WITH YOUR GOOD FRIEND ERIC.

199
00:08:58,412 --> 00:08:59,746
AND?

200
00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:03,500
AND THAT'S THE OLDEST STORY
IN THE WORLD.

201
00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:06,836
AND A SAD ONE, AT THAT.

202
00:09:07,713 --> 00:09:09,073
YOU KNOW WHAT, MAN?
I HAD A CHANCE,

203
00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:10,340
AND I DIDN'T TAKE IT.

204
00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:12,217
AND ONCE FORMAN GIVES
HER THAT RING, MAN,

205
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,927
THEY'RE GOING OUT...

206
00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:15,262
AND IT WOULD BE REALLY SCUMMY

207
00:09:15,429 --> 00:09:17,389
TO HIT ON HER THEN.

208
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,682
NOT THAT I WOULDN'T DO IT.

209
00:09:18,849 --> 00:09:20,684
IT JUST WOULD BE REALLY SCUMMY.

210
00:09:20,851 --> 00:09:22,310
IF YOU DON'T TELL DONNA
HOW YOU FEEL,

211
00:09:22,478 --> 00:09:25,480
THEN YOU WILL REGRET IT.

212
00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:26,648
I'M GOING TO THE VINEYARD.

213
00:09:26,649 --> 00:09:28,733
GOOD FOR YOU!

214
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:30,318
OH, DON'T TELL ERIC WHAT I SAID,

215
00:09:30,486 --> 00:09:33,613
BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE
HIS BASEMENT.

216
00:09:42,039 --> 00:09:44,332
WELL, THIS IS... QUITE A MENU.

217
00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:46,376
YEAH.

218
00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:48,211
YOU GOT ENOUGH MONEY?

219
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:50,589
OH, YEAH. FOR ME.

220
00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:53,675
OH, I'M SORRY, WERE YOU
GOING TO EAT SOMETHING TOO?

221
00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:57,304
ACTUALLY, UH...
I'M IN THE MOOD FOR CHICKEN.

222
00:09:57,471 --> 00:09:58,471
OH, WHAT A COINCIDENCE.

223
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:02,684
I, TOO, AM ORDERING
THE CHEAPEST THING ON THE MENU.

224
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:05,770
YOU LOOK REALLY NICE TONIGHT.

225
00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:08,898
OH, SO DO YOU.

226
00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:10,609
LOOK, DONNA...

227
00:10:10,776 --> 00:10:11,776
HELLO!

228
00:10:11,819 --> 00:10:13,486
CAN I START YOU FOLKS OFF
WITH DRINKS?

229
00:10:13,654 --> 00:10:14,946
WELL, SU... AHEM!

230
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,740
[DEEP VOICE] I'LL HAVE A BEER.

231
00:10:16,907 --> 00:10:18,033
ALL RIGHT.

232
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:21,578
UM... I'D LIKE AN ICED TEA.

233
00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:24,831
HE DIDN'T EVEN PROOF ME!

234
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:25,999
IT MUST BE THE JACKET.

235
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,459
WHAT SIDEBURNS?

236
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:28,835
THESE SIDEBURNS, RIGHT?

237
00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:31,296
THESE...

238
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,593
I DON'T KNOW WHY
THEY CALL IT FONDUE.

239
00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:38,678
THEY SHOULD CALL IT "FUNDUE"

240
00:10:38,846 --> 00:10:42,474
'CAUSE IT IS "FUN."

241
00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:47,479
I LOVE FONDUE. IT'S GOURMET!

242
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,847
SO, WHAT DO WE DO HERE, KITTY?

243
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:50,774
OKAY, NOW, UM, WHAT YOU DO IS

244
00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:54,069
YOU PUT A PIECE OF STEAK
ON YOUR FONDUE FORK...

245
00:10:54,236 --> 00:10:55,654
NOW, HOW HOT EXACTLY IS THIS?

246
00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:59,699
NO, NO, BOB!
THAT IS A FON-DON'T!

247
00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:03,078
DON'T... PUT YOUR HAND
IN THE HOT OIL.

248
00:11:03,245 --> 00:11:07,290
WHO KNEW YOU COULDN'T PUT
YOUR HAND IN THE HOT OIL?

249
00:11:11,545 --> 00:11:14,506
HERE, CHICKEN, CHICKEN, CHICKEN!

250
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,675
DONNA. SHH. PLEASE.

251
00:11:16,842 --> 00:11:19,803
[WHISPERING] OH, I'M SORRY.

252
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:21,888
ARE YOU OKAY?

253
00:11:22,056 --> 00:11:24,683
I AM GREAT.

254
00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:26,810
I THINK YOU'RE DRUNK.

255
00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:28,061
OH.

256
00:11:28,229 --> 00:11:30,105
I THINK I AM, TOO.

257
00:11:30,272 --> 00:11:31,898
HOW COULD I BE DRUNK?

258
00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:33,858
WELL, THERE'S ABOUT
5 SHOTS OF ALCOHOL

259
00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:36,194
IN THE LONG ISLAND ICED TEA.

260
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:37,696
LONG ISLAND ICED TEA?

261
00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:38,863
YEAH. WELL,
YOU GUYS ORDERED DRINKS.

262
00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:40,231
AND I'M READY FOR ANOTHER ONE!

263
00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:41,658
NO! SHE'S GOOD!
THANK YOU. THANKS.

264
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:44,828
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANKS.

265
00:11:44,995 --> 00:11:46,705
I LOVE YOUR LITTLE BUTT, ERIC.

266
00:11:46,872 --> 00:11:48,540
OH!

267
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:51,334
IT'S SO LITTLE.

268
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:53,336
YEAH, YEAH.

269
00:11:53,504 --> 00:11:55,213
AND YOU'RE SO GOOD,
ERIC. YOU'RE...

270
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:56,589
SO DARN GOOD.

271
00:11:56,757 --> 00:11:57,966
I THINK IT'S COFFEE TIME.

272
00:11:58,134 --> 00:12:01,136
YOU'RE SO GOOD, IT MAKES ME HOT.

273
00:12:01,303 --> 00:12:03,304
OR TIME FOR
ANOTHER ICED TEA, MAN.

274
00:12:03,472 --> 00:12:04,597
SING TO ME, ERIC.

275
00:12:04,765 --> 00:12:06,099
Y-YOU KNOW, I DON'T
SING... SING ME A SONG.

276
00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:08,143
DO IT, OR I'LL SCREAM!

277
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:10,019
♪ MOVE IT IN, MOVE IT OUT ♪

278
00:12:10,187 --> 00:12:12,230
♪ SHOVE IT IN, SHOVE IT OUT ♪

279
00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:14,482
♪ DISCO LADY ♪

280
00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:16,067
♪ MOVE IT IN, MOVE IT OUT ♪

281
00:12:16,235 --> 00:12:18,486
♪ SHOVE IT IN, ALL ABOUT ♪

282
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:22,240
WHOA.

283
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:24,159
WELL, JACKIE,

284
00:12:24,326 --> 00:12:26,661
IT'S NOW 9:00, WHICH MEANS
THAT EVERY SHOE STORE

285
00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:28,204
IN THE GREATER OSHKOSH AREA

286
00:12:28,372 --> 00:12:32,584
IS CLOSED FOR THE NIGHT.

287
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,794
SO...

288
00:12:34,962 --> 00:12:37,422
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO NOW?

289
00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:40,508
HEY! LET'S GO LOOK
AT THE NEW CORVETTES!

290
00:12:40,676 --> 00:12:43,470
OH, YEAH! UH...

291
00:12:43,637 --> 00:12:46,681
I MEAN...

292
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:48,808
NO.

293
00:12:48,976 --> 00:12:52,437
THAT JUST SOUNDS BORING.

294
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,148
WELL...

295
00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:57,609
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

296
00:12:57,777 --> 00:13:00,862
I DON'T KNOW.

297
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:03,615
OH, WAIT. YOU KNOW
WHAT WE COULD DO?

298
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,450
WE COULD, UH...

299
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:09,037
"PROVE OUR LOVE"
TO EACH OTHER AGAIN.

300
00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:10,538
NO, MICHAEL,

301
00:13:10,706 --> 00:13:12,957
WE ARE NOT GOING TO...

302
00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:15,794
"PROVE OUR LOVE" EVERY SINGLE
TIME WE HAVE A CHANCE.

303
00:13:15,961 --> 00:13:17,754
WHY NOT?

304
00:13:17,922 --> 00:13:19,798
BECAUSE IT DOESN'T
WORK LIKE THAT.

305
00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:21,549
AND JUST BECAUSE WE DID IT ONCE

306
00:13:21,717 --> 00:13:23,927
DOES NOT MEAN WE'RE EVER
GOING TO DO IT AGAIN.

307
00:13:24,094 --> 00:13:27,222
OKAY, WELL, NOW YOU'RE
JUST TALKING CRAZY.

308
00:13:27,389 --> 00:13:29,849
NO, MICHAEL. NO, I'M NOT.

309
00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:32,310
AND IF YOU THINK THAT'S HOW
IT'S GOING TO WORK, MICHAEL,

310
00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:33,812
WELL, THEN YOU'RE WRONG.

311
00:13:33,979 --> 00:13:36,356
WELL, DAMN, JACKIE!

312
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,983
SO, I SPEND ALL NIGHT
LOOKING FOR YOUR... YOUR...

313
00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:40,860
YOUR STUPID SHOES,
AND WE'RE NOT EVEN GOING TO...

314
00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:42,987
NO.

315
00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:46,449
FINE!

316
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:51,120
ARE YOU SURE
YOU'RE OKAY WITH THAT?

317
00:13:52,456 --> 00:13:54,415
[WEAKLY] YEAH.

318
00:13:57,711 --> 00:14:00,088
OKAY, LET'S DO IT.

319
00:14:05,761 --> 00:14:07,262
CRAP! OUCH!

320
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,013
YAAH! AAH!

321
00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:10,598
JEEZ! SHOOT!

322
00:14:10,766 --> 00:14:12,725
MY EYE!

323
00:14:19,191 --> 00:14:20,441
GOD...

324
00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:21,860
[THUMP] IT'S SO...

325
00:14:22,027 --> 00:14:23,027
[THUMP] CROWDED...

326
00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:24,362
[THUMP] IN HERE!

327
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:25,864
[THUMP] ERIC!

328
00:14:26,031 --> 00:14:28,783
MEET ME UNDER THE TABLE.

329
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:31,452
DONNA, NO.

330
00:14:31,620 --> 00:14:33,997
NO... WELL... NO! LOOK, DONNA...

331
00:14:34,748 --> 00:14:36,457
COME ON. UH, WAITER. WAITER?

332
00:14:36,625 --> 00:14:38,209
UH... OKAY.

333
00:14:38,377 --> 00:14:39,878
I'M GOING TO GO
GET YOU SOME COFFEE,

334
00:14:40,045 --> 00:14:43,172
SO... NO GOING UNDER
THE TABLE AND NO SINGING.

335
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:45,675
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

336
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:53,433
PEOPLE, THE CHICKEN HERE
IS EXCELLENT.

337
00:14:55,019 --> 00:14:56,311
HEY...

338
00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:58,771
HYDE'S HERE!

339
00:14:58,939 --> 00:15:00,565
HI, HYDE.

340
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:03,902
HEY, DONNA. UH...

341
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:05,695
WHERE'S FORMAN?

342
00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:09,532
COFFEE.

343
00:15:09,700 --> 00:15:14,662
OKAY, LOOK, I'M JUST GOING
TO SAY THIS, ALL RIGHT?

344
00:15:15,831 --> 00:15:18,625
DONNA, I HAVE
FEELINGS FOR YOU...

345
00:15:18,792 --> 00:15:22,921
AND I THINK THAT YOU
HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME.

346
00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:24,648
AND FORMAN'S GOING
TO GIVE YOU HIS RING,

347
00:15:24,673 --> 00:15:27,592
AND I HOPE THAT BEFORE
YOU TAKE IT, YOU THINK ABOUT...

348
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:31,346
BEEP!

349
00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,437
HEY, ERIC.

350
00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:41,397
HYDE'S HERE.

351
00:15:41,565 --> 00:15:45,109
♪ HYDE-EE HYDE-EE
HYDE-EE HYDE-EE ♪

352
00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:47,737
HEY, WE'RE ON A DATE HERE.

353
00:15:47,905 --> 00:15:49,530
YEAH, MAN, WELL,
YOU SHOULDN'T BE,

354
00:15:49,698 --> 00:15:51,658
BECAUSE WE'RE SUPPOSED
TO BE AT THE LIBRARY!

355
00:15:51,825 --> 00:15:54,035
HYDE, IF SHE WANTED
TO BE AT THE LIBRARY,

356
00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,620
SHE'D BE AT THE LIBRARY.

357
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:56,579
OH, MY GOD.

358
00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,289
WHAT DO YOU MEAN
BY "OH, MY GOD"?

359
00:15:58,457 --> 00:15:59,457
OH, MY GOD!

360
00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:02,126
OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD!

361
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:06,965
LOOK, WHEN MY DATE'S
DONE PUKING...

362
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:09,425
YOU'D BETTER NOT BE HERE.

363
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,058
EXCUSE ME. HI.

364
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:20,520
CAN I GET THIS IN
A DOGGIE BAG, PLEASE?

365
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:21,729
THANKS.

366
00:16:21,897 --> 00:16:24,107
OH, AND I'M IN A HURRY.

367
00:16:28,070 --> 00:16:30,989
I FEEL SO CLOSE TO YOU, MICHAEL.

368
00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:34,534
MICHAEL AND JACKIE,
JACKIE AND MICHAEL.

369
00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:36,285
DOESN'T THAT SOUND GOOD?

370
00:16:36,453 --> 00:16:38,496
MICHAEL AND JACKIE.

371
00:16:38,664 --> 00:16:40,957
TRUE LOVE. ALWAYS.

372
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:43,835
FOREVER.

373
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,296
FOREVER?

374
00:16:47,464 --> 00:16:48,673
FOREVER.

375
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,341
DANCES...

376
00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,010
LONG WALKS...

377
00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:53,428
CANDLES...

378
00:16:53,595 --> 00:16:54,846
FLOWERS...

379
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,348
BABIES! HOUSE.

380
00:16:57,516 --> 00:16:59,976
SHACKLE. CHAIN.

381
00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:01,769
DESPAIR. PRISON.

382
00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,187
DEATH!

383
00:17:03,355 --> 00:17:05,773
OHH...

384
00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:10,653
NNN...

385
00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:14,240
JONATHAN SEAGULL DISCOVERED...

386
00:17:14,408 --> 00:17:15,658
THAT BOREDOM...

387
00:17:15,826 --> 00:17:16,993
FEAR!

388
00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:18,411
AND ANGER...

389
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:21,414
ARE THE REASONS
A GULL'S LIFE IS SO SHORT,

390
00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:23,541
AND WITH THIS GONE
FROM HIS THOUGHT,

391
00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:26,044
HE LIVED A LOOONG...

392
00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:29,630
FINE LIFE INDEED!

393
00:17:29,798 --> 00:17:32,717
BRAVO!

394
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,302
MMMWAH!

395
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:36,512
ISN'T SHE A HOT TOMATO?

396
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:37,764
OH, JEEZ...

397
00:17:37,931 --> 00:17:40,099
TO THE LOVEMAKING.

398
00:17:41,185 --> 00:17:42,935
OOH! HEE HEE...

399
00:17:43,103 --> 00:17:46,105
WE HAD A WONDERFUL TIME.

400
00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:47,607
MY GOD!

401
00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:50,359
SHH! SHH! SHH!

402
00:17:51,570 --> 00:17:53,237
OKAY, THEY'RE GONE.

403
00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:56,032
THEY USED TO BE NORMAL.

404
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,034
WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THEM?

405
00:17:58,202 --> 00:17:59,452
WELL, I DON'T KNOW.

406
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:03,414
HOW CAN SHE NOT EAT MEAT?
THAT CAN'T BE HEALTHY.

407
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:06,084
REMEMBER WHEN WE USED TO
GO ON VACATION TOGETHER?

408
00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:09,045
BOB AND I USED TO GO
FISHING, DRINK BEERS...

409
00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:11,297
I MEAN, WE USED TO
HAVE FUN WITH THEM.

410
00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,966
NOW THEY'RE INTO
EVERY FAD THERE IS.

411
00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:15,510
THINGS CHANGE, KITTY.

412
00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:18,304
WELL, WE DON'T.

413
00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:20,807
WELL...

414
00:18:20,974 --> 00:18:23,392
WE DON'T HAVE TO.

415
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:28,231
WE'RE CLASSIC.

416
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:32,401
YOU KNOW...

417
00:18:32,569 --> 00:18:38,574
MIDGE WASN'T WEARING
A BRA TONIGHT.

418
00:18:38,742 --> 00:18:40,451
YEAH.

419
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:45,790
BOB WASN'T WEARING UNDERWEAR.

420
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:52,713
THANKS FOR, UH,
HOLDING MY HAIR WHEN I WAS...

421
00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:54,215
OH.

422
00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:55,508
JUST...

423
00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:58,928
THANKS FOR MISSING MY SHOES.

424
00:18:59,596 --> 00:19:02,098
WELL, I, UH... I GUESS
I BLEW OUR BIG NIGHT.

425
00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:03,891
NO, NO.

426
00:19:04,059 --> 00:19:05,101
LOOK, IT'S COOL.

427
00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:06,869
I MEAN, I THOUGHT
I WAS GOING TO BLOW IT,

428
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:08,146
AND THEN... I MEAN,
YOU TOTALLY BLEW IT,

429
00:19:08,313 --> 00:19:10,064
SO, I MEAN, IT'S ALL RIGHT.

430
00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:11,552
YOU KNOW, BY TELLING
ME I BLEW IT,

431
00:19:11,692 --> 00:19:14,485
YOU BASICALLY
JUST BLEW IT, SO...

432
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:16,821
AND I WAS DOING
SO GOOD HERE, WITH THE...

433
00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:20,783
JACKET AND THE COFFEE,
HOLDING YOUR HAIR BACK.

434
00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:23,661
I WAS SO IN.

435
00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:26,247
YOU'RE STILL IN.

436
00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:28,015
LOOK, DONNA, I WANT
TO BE YOUR BOYFRIEND,

437
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,292
AND YOU'RE ALL
I EVER THINK ABOUT.

438
00:19:29,459 --> 00:19:32,211
WILL YOU WEAR MY CLASS RING?

439
00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:33,462
YES.

440
00:19:33,630 --> 00:19:37,842
YES?

441
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,054
YOU KNOW...

442
00:19:42,222 --> 00:19:43,639
WHY DON'T WE KISS ON THAT LATER?

443
00:19:43,807 --> 00:19:45,183
OH, RIGHT. VOMITING.

444
00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:47,685
YEAH. YEAH.

445
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:50,479
NO, WAIT, YOU KNOW WHAT?

446
00:19:50,647 --> 00:19:52,023
I DON'T CARE.

447
00:19:52,191 --> 00:19:54,650
YOU'RE MY GIRLFRIEND.

448
00:20:00,115 --> 00:20:02,200
SO, FORMAN, MAN...

449
00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:04,911
I'M SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT
WITH DONNA.

450
00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:10,499
AND FOR TAKING YOUR DINNER.

451
00:20:10,667 --> 00:20:13,002
SO, ARE WE COOL, MAN?

452
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,088
YEAH, MAN.

453
00:20:16,256 --> 00:20:17,965
WE'VE GOT TO BE.

454
00:20:18,133 --> 00:20:19,467
LOOK, WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS
SINCE KINDERGARTEN.

455
00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:22,887
NO GIRL'S GOING TO
COME BETWEEN US.

456
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:24,847
THAT'S GREAT, MAN.

457
00:20:25,015 --> 00:20:27,558
SO, UM...

458
00:20:27,726 --> 00:20:29,727
IF DONNA EVER BREAKS UP WITH YOU

459
00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:32,355
AND STARTS DATING ME,
ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?

460
00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:37,860
NO.

461
00:20:39,571 --> 00:20:41,447
TONIGHT... [SNIFFLES]

462
00:20:41,615 --> 00:20:44,992
I LEARNED THERE'S A PRICE
TO BE PAID FOR DOING IT.

463
00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:47,411
SHE SAID, "FOREVER," MAN,

464
00:20:47,579 --> 00:20:50,623
AND I THINK SHE MEANT IT.

465
00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:53,042
THE INSIDE OF MY MOUTH
FEELS LIKE COTTON,

466
00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:56,879
AS IF COTTON WAS IN MY MOUTH.

467
00:20:57,589 --> 00:21:00,508
ALSO, MAN, WOMEN
ARE LIKE MUFFINS, OKAY?

468
00:21:00,676 --> 00:21:01,996
AND ONCE YOU'VE HAD
A MUFFIN, MAN,

469
00:21:02,135 --> 00:21:05,346
YOU'LL PUT UP WITH ANYTHING
TO HAVE ANOTHER MUFFIN.

470
00:21:05,514 --> 00:21:07,390
AND THEY KNOW THAT.

471
00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:10,643
NOW SHE REALLY OWNS YOU, MAN.

472
00:21:10,811 --> 00:21:12,770
HYDE.

473
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,606
YOU SURE KNOW A LOT ABOUT WOMEN,

474
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:17,108
BUT, I MEAN...

475
00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:20,778
YOU NEVER REALLY HAD
A STEADY GIRLFRIEND, SO...

476
00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:23,614
WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT?

477
00:21:23,782 --> 00:21:25,241
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT
THAT'S ALL ABOUT, FORMAN.

478
00:21:25,409 --> 00:21:27,285
MY MIND IS PURE, MAN!

479
00:21:27,452 --> 00:21:29,787
I DON'T FALL VICTIM
TO THE FEMALE RACE!

480
00:21:29,955 --> 00:21:31,205
I'M HERE,

481
00:21:31,373 --> 00:21:32,957
SANS GIRLFRIEND,

482
00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:35,084
TO HELP YOU GUYS OUT.

483
00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:40,965
THEN I HAVE A QUESTION, HYDE.

484
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:45,136
HOW MUCH MASTURBATION
IS TOO MUCH?

485
00:21:46,221 --> 00:21:49,181
NO SUCH THING AS TOO MUCH, FEZ.

486
00:21:49,766 --> 00:21:55,104
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
CARSEY-WERNER AND FOX BROADCASTING

487
00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:02,153
HOW DID IT GO?

488
00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:05,323
IT WAS GREAT.

489
00:22:05,490 --> 00:22:08,909
GOTCHA. MOM...

490
00:22:09,077 --> 00:22:11,329
ANYBODY MENTION HOW NICE
THAT SPORT COAT WAS?

491
00:22:11,496 --> 00:22:12,496
DONNA.

492
00:22:12,664 --> 00:22:13,664
HEY, THERE YOU GO.

493
00:22:13,790 --> 00:22:15,374
SO YOU HAD FUN, HUH?

494
00:22:15,542 --> 00:22:17,960
YEAH, DAD. THANKS.

495
00:22:18,128 --> 00:22:20,713
YOU KNOW, YOU GOT A CHUNK
OF CARROT ON YOUR SHOE THERE.

496
00:22:20,881 --> 00:22:22,381
CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE
NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.

497
00:22:22,549 --> 00:22:23,883
YEAH, DAD. THANKS.

498
00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:27,731
PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT
PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE

