1
00:00:03,921 --> 00:00:06,595
Oh, my God, I can't believe
how big Halley's getting.

2
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:07,765
Yeah. Where's Howard?

3
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:08,842
<i>He's changing Michael.</i>

4
00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:10,428
<i>All done. You know, fun fact,</i>

5
00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:13,310
<i>did you know baby boys
can pee straight up?</i>

6
00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,725
Grown-up boys, too.

7
00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:19,858
Why would we high-five that?

8
00:00:20,938 --> 00:00:22,485
So how are you guys?

9
00:00:22,606 --> 00:00:23,653
<i>BERNADETTE: Really good.</i>

10
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,697
<i>Except for when we went
grocery shopping,</i>

11
00:00:25,776 --> 00:00:27,653
<i>and the checkout lady asked
when I was due.</i>

12
00:00:27,903 --> 00:00:29,371
<i>But you handled it well.</i>

13
00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:35,164
Well, if you guys need help,
I'd be happy to come over.

14
00:00:35,244 --> 00:00:37,838
<i>Oh, thanks, but we're really
trying to enjoy this family time</i>

15
00:00:37,913 --> 00:00:39,256
<i>before we both go back to work.</i>

16
00:00:39,498 --> 00:00:40,841
Okay, well, we all miss you.

17
00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,668
- You guys, too.
- Bye.

18
00:00:43,669 --> 00:00:46,422
(SIGHS) Boy, seeing them
all together like that

19
00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:49,634
has got my biological clock
ticking like crazy.

20
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,804
- Yeah, I don't think men have...
-l do.

21
00:00:55,973 --> 00:00:56,974
- Hi.
- Hello.

22
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,559
- Hey, guys.
- Good news.

23
00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:00,235
We have save the date cards.

24
00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:01,357
<i>£53:</i>

25
00:01:01,436 --> 00:01:03,734
Didn't go with my calligrapher.
Interesting.

26
00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:07,026
What is this picture?

27
00:01:07,109 --> 00:01:09,407
Oh, It's an MRI of our brains
photoshopped

28
00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:10,829
to look like they're kissing.

29
00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:13,491
Is it too sexy?

30
00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:15,204
It's too something.

31
00:01:17,119 --> 00:01:18,962
Guys, May 12, that's exciting.

32
00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:21,039
- I know.
- Do you guys have a location yet?

33
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,420
'Cause you don't have a lot of time.

34
00:01:22,499 --> 00:01:24,092
Hey, it took us nine
months to pick a date,

35
00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:26,135
and a week to decide if
brains can have lips on them,

36
00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:27,588
so get in the boat and row.

37
00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:31,216
(THEME SONG PLAYING)

38
00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:58,786
- Michael's out.
- So is Halley.

39
00:01:59,536 --> 00:02:00,958
Oh, my God, he's so cute.

40
00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:02,748
So is she.

41
00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:05,425
- Switch?
- Yeah.

42
00:02:09,338 --> 00:02:12,387
- Oh, my God, he's so cute.
- So is she.

43
00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:14,809
I just love them so much.

44
00:02:15,302 --> 00:02:16,554
Me, too.

45
00:02:17,179 --> 00:02:19,307
My heart feels like it's gonna explode.

46
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,351
Of course, it's full of brisket,
so it probably will.

47
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:28,320
I didn't even know I was capable
of loving someone so much.

48
00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:30,484
More than me?

49
00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:33,445
- Oh, what...
-l'm just messing with you.

50
00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:35,121
I totally love them more than you.

51
00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:37,824
I get that.

52
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:39,459
I would take a bullet for them.

53
00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:43,630
But I would get seriously
mutilated for you.

54
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,170
That's sweet.

55
00:02:46,249 --> 00:02:47,842
But you should know,
if you got seriously mutilated,

56
00:02:47,918 --> 00:02:49,261
I might dump you.

57
00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:53,682
You'd be crazy not to.
Even unmutilated, I'm no prize.

58
00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:59,221
You know, I'm really happy
with our wedding date.

59
00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:03,317
The month squared equals the
square of the sum of the members

60
00:03:03,392 --> 00:03:05,190
of the set of prime factors of the day.

61
00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:06,440
Isn't that romantic?

62
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:09,864
Yes, it's like that Shakespeare sonnet,

63
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:11,487
"Shall I compare thee to a day

64
00:03:11,566 --> 00:03:13,443
"that's also a really weird
math problem."

65
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:18,411
It's a shame you're joking. That'd be
a lovely reading at our ceremony.

66
00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:21,497
Well, we only have
two months to find a venue,

67
00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:23,169
and I had a thought.

68
00:03:23,245 --> 00:03:25,168
What about the Athenaeum club
at Caltech?

69
00:03:25,414 --> 00:03:28,008
(EXHALES) Albert Einstein
was a member there.

70
00:03:28,083 --> 00:03:29,175
- It's beautiful.
- Yeah.

71
00:03:29,251 --> 00:03:31,345
And Albert Einstein was a member there.

72
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,174
- It's close.
- And Albert Einstein was a member there.

73
00:03:35,841 --> 00:03:37,468
And Albert Einstein was a member there.

74
00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:38,894
There!

75
00:03:39,428 --> 00:03:41,977
Now you sound like a woman
who wants to get married.

76
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,397
- So you're interested?
- Oh, of course.

77
00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:47,728
Yeah, but that club
is extremely exclusive.

78
00:03:47,853 --> 00:03:49,605
You know, Leonard's been trying
to get us in there for years,

79
00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:50,814
but no luck.

80
00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:51,898
Well, that's odd.

81
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:54,076
When I called, they said they'd
be excited to give us a tour.

82
00:03:54,317 --> 00:03:55,614
Well, I suppose we can give it a look,

83
00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,537
and if it doesn't work out,
I hear that there is

84
00:03:57,612 --> 00:04:01,116
a nearby Chinese restaurant
that Einstein used to frequent.

85
00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:06,876
Or, we pick a place we like,
and don't worry about Einstein.

86
00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:08,172
(SCOFFS)

87
00:04:08,623 --> 00:04:11,547
Boy, reality TV is right,
brides are crazy.

88
00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:17,057
So, how has it been,
being home with two kids?

89
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:19,760
(SIGHS) Tiring, but super rewarding.

90
00:04:20,177 --> 00:04:22,020
Like Pilates, yeah, got it.

91
00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:26,725
Honestly, it's gonna be hard
when we both go back to work.

92
00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:30,021
I've been thinking maybe
it would be better if

93
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:32,026
one of us decided to stay home.

94
00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:36,326
I don't know, I was raised
by servants, and look at me.

95
00:04:38,153 --> 00:04:40,656
I literally can't tell
if you think that's good or bad.

96
00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:43,909
Well, on one hand, they filled
my tub with scented oils

97
00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,915
and brought me honeyed sweets,
on the other hand,

98
00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:48,122
I spent my twenties incapable
of talking to women.

99
00:04:48,205 --> 00:04:51,630
So you know, pros and cons.

100
00:04:54,044 --> 00:04:57,093
Here's my dilemma.
I kind of want to stay home.

101
00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:59,891
But Bernadette is a way better
parent than I am.

102
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:01,680
Wait, does Bernadette want to stay home?

103
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:04,187
I don't know. She's really
invested in her career,

104
00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:05,639
and she's doing great.

105
00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:07,099
I think it should be me.

106
00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:09,855
Wow, I admire you, Howard.

107
00:05:09,935 --> 00:05:13,781
It would be hard for me to buck
traditional gender roles like that.

108
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:18,786
Didn't you see Taylor Swift
twice this month?

109
00:05:21,071 --> 00:05:24,496
Yeah, because she's hot,
not because she sings my truth.

110
00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:31,169
Did Albert Einstein ever sit
in any of these chairs?

111
00:05:31,456 --> 00:05:32,833
I think these are fairly new.

112
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:34,384
But Stephen Hawking's eaten here a lot.

113
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,296
Yeah, but he brings
his own chair, you know?

114
00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:41,095
Well, it seems kind of perfect,

115
00:05:41,466 --> 00:05:42,638
and it's close enough to your office,

116
00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:44,219
so you can use the bathroom you like.

117
00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:48,269
I put a sticker over the auto-flush,
so it doesn't startle me.

118
00:05:51,268 --> 00:05:53,111
Here's my card.
Why don't you two talk it over,

119
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:55,689
and I will check to see
if our soup spoons

120
00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:58,150
are "deeper than they are wide."

121
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,078
What? Too deep is a ladle, not a spoon.

122
00:06:02,153 --> 00:06:03,245
(SCOFFS)

123
00:06:04,906 --> 00:06:06,249
I really like it.

124
00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:08,251
Oh, I must admit, I do, as well.

125
00:06:08,577 --> 00:06:11,706
Look at how somber all
the men in these portraits are.

126
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:14,629
I feel like that sets
a good tone for our wedding.

127
00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:16,918
Is that Leonard?

128
00:06:17,085 --> 00:06:20,715
Uh, no, no. These are all dead,
accomplished scientists.

129
00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:23,471
Leonard will only ever be
one of those things.

130
00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:27,892
I mean, Leonard and Penny
are right there.

131
00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:31,520
But he told me he checked on
our membership just last week,

132
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,944
and we were still 400th in line.

133
00:06:35,186 --> 00:06:38,531
I'm sure there's an innocent explanation
that won't ruin my day at all.

134
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:40,775
Leonard.

135
00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:41,860
- Oh, hey.
- Hey.

136
00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:42,944
How did you get in here?

137
00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:44,658
What do you mean? Leonard's a member.

138
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,249
You told me it was incredibly exclusive.

139
00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:51,624
Yeah, look, about that, I lied.

140
00:06:53,288 --> 00:06:55,211
Hey, wait, you told me
it was exclusive, too.

141
00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:59,170
Mm-hmm. I avoided him and impressed you,
all with the same lie.

142
00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:02,259
Damn, Hofstadter, didn't
think you had it in you.

143
00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:05,929
Well, I'm not sure I know
how I feel about this place now.

144
00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:07,389
Then don't turn around.

145
00:07:07,636 --> 00:07:09,183
Cooper!

146
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,273
Oh. Good, you're here.

147
00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:18,697
There's (CLEARS THROAT) something
I want to talk to you about.

148
00:07:19,064 --> 00:07:21,988
We're not putting a TV in the bathroom.
That's how you get hemorrhoids.

149
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:25,241
No, this is important.

150
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:26,738
Uh...

151
00:07:26,863 --> 00:07:30,663
I was thinking maybe one of us should
stay home full-time, with the kids.

152
00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:34,375
Oh, great, so I have to give up my job
and everything I've worked for?

153
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,549
Actually, I was thinking
I should stay home.

154
00:07:37,832 --> 00:07:40,210
Oh, so I have to abandon
my children and go back to work,

155
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,421
while you get to stay home
and bond with them?

156
00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:45,765
You just said you didn't want to.

157
00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:49,846
No, I don't want to have to,
but if I want to, I should get to.

158
00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:53,936
Do you want to?

159
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,184
Maybe I do.

160
00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:57,940
What if I also want to?

161
00:07:58,144 --> 00:08:00,567
Well, I don't know,
we can't both stay home.

162
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:03,149
Don't you think
you should go back to work,

163
00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:04,860
because you make more money?

164
00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:06,365
Don't you think
you should make more money?

165
00:08:08,571 --> 00:08:10,323
I think it's pretty sexist of you to say

166
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,580
a dad can't stay home with his children.

167
00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:15,462
You know what else is sexist,
the phrase "suck it,"

168
00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:16,663
yet, here we are.

169
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:23,132
I can't believe Leonard lied to me.

170
00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:24,679
What are we gonna find out next,

171
00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:26,927
that he's not really lactose intolerant?

172
00:08:28,591 --> 00:08:31,470
He's just friends with
an invisible trumpet player?

173
00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:36,066
I know you're upset, but if
we want to book the Athenaeum,

174
00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:38,564
we really should do it
now, and then, I promise,

175
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:40,862
we'll have our whole lives
to complain about Leonard.

176
00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:45,609
Oh, somebody got a head start
on her vows.

177
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:49,742
So do we agree?
Do we want to get married there?

178
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,498
I don't know.

179
00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:54,292
I mean, Einstein was a member.
I like that.

180
00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:58,372
You know? But Leonard's a member,
and that really steams my clams.

181
00:08:59,831 --> 00:09:02,380
Oh, I love it when you're folksy.
I'm just gonna call.

182
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:06,096
On the other hand, shaming
Leonard during our wedding

183
00:09:06,171 --> 00:09:07,798
at the very place he betrayed me

184
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,259
does have a beautiful symmetry to it.

185
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:14,809
That's nice, it'll be your first
petty act as a married man.

186
00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:18,350
Oh, hi, Kathleen?

187
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:21,270
Yeah, this is Amy from earlier.

188
00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:23,855
I'd like to go ahead and reserve May 12.

189
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,115
Although, it is our wedding.

190
00:09:26,191 --> 00:09:28,535
Well, maybe it shouldn't be
all about revenge.

191
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:32,364
Oh, I see.

192
00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:34,332
Okay, thanks.

193
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:40,459
- Someone booked our date.
- Uh... What?

194
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:41,748
Who?

195
00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:44,584
Well, well, well.

196
00:09:46,503 --> 00:09:48,426
This is a pickle.

197
00:09:49,547 --> 00:09:53,177
Yes, so, if you will just move
your birthday party

198
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:55,682
to a different location,
everything will be fine.

199
00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:57,931
Oh, it's tricky.

200
00:09:58,223 --> 00:10:01,227
I don't want to move my party,
but I also don't want to help you...

201
00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:03,107
Oh, wait, I don't have a problem.

202
00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:07,072
No. I do.

203
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,033
Yeah, you do.

204
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:18,164
- Morning.
- Hey, where you been?

205
00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:21,413
Oh, nowhere special.
Just the park, the farmer's market,

206
00:10:21,496 --> 00:10:23,089
then we hopped on the Gold Line
to Chinatown

207
00:10:23,164 --> 00:10:26,509
because it's important for the kids
to experience other cultures.

208
00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:27,961
What have you been doing?

209
00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:31,013
It's 8:00 a.m. Sleeping.

210
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:33,759
Oh, so are the kids.
I guess they take after you.

211
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:39,640
You're just trying to prove that
you'd do a betterjob than me.

212
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:42,943
(CHUCKLES) You're pretty sharp
having just woken up.

213
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:47,109
Howard, we both know
you can't keep up this pace.

214
00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,736
By this afternoon you're gonna
be passed out on the couch

215
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,114
and I'm gonna have three
exhausted babies to deal with.

216
00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:54,829
Not true. I got this.

217
00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:57,327
You know, in fact,
why don't you take the day off?

218
00:10:57,907 --> 00:11:00,626
Fine. Maybe I'll have lunch with Penny.

219
00:11:00,702 --> 00:11:02,875
Take your time. Get a massage.

220
00:11:02,954 --> 00:11:06,128
You deserve it after all
the sleep you've been getting.

221
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,137
Maybe Barry will change his mind.

222
00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:13,301
Oh, I doubt it.

223
00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:15,679
I said some pretty unprofessional things
about his work.

224
00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:18,520
I may have even used the "S" word.

225
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,057
Subpar?

226
00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:25,439
I'm not proud of it, Amy,
but I have a temper.

227
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:29,356
Well, I suppose we could pick
a different date.

228
00:11:29,439 --> 00:11:31,316
Well, it took you nine months
to choose that one.

229
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:32,901
I'll pick a different husband first.

230
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:36,371
(KNOCK AT DOOR)

231
00:11:37,071 --> 00:11:40,075
Hey, ljust, I wanted to
apologize about the Athenaeum.

232
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:42,494
- Why did you lie to me?
-l don't know.

233
00:11:42,577 --> 00:11:44,170
It just seemed funny at first

234
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:47,124
and then the longer it went on,
funnier it got.

235
00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:51,469
So, yeah, I guess that's why.

236
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:54,681
That's not much of an apology.

237
00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:56,432
Yeah, because he's not really sorry.

238
00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:59,302
Obviously, he wanted a place
to go where I wouldn't be

239
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:02,681
and apparently all of outside
wasn't enough for him.

240
00:12:03,598 --> 00:12:04,895
Come on. I do feel bad.

241
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:07,023
Uh, why? Did your best friend
hurt your feelings?

242
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:08,228
- Come on, Sheldon.
- Look,

243
00:12:08,311 --> 00:12:10,279
I only have time to deal
with one jerk right now

244
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:12,073
-and that's Barry Kripke.
- What?

245
00:12:12,607 --> 00:12:14,826
He has the Athenaeum booked
for our wedding date

246
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,574
-and he won't give it up.
- Yeah, so if you could just

247
00:12:16,653 --> 00:12:18,621
please leave before I get angry

248
00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:21,370
and say something I will regret
about your face, your height,

249
00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:24,248
your personal hygiene or
the fact that your science,

250
00:12:24,327 --> 00:12:27,080
while serviceable, lacks panache.

251
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:31,176
That's actually one of the nicest things
you've ever said about my work.

252
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:34,220
And now I regret it. Goodbye.

253
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,347
Hey. There you are.

254
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,474
Yeah, ljust wanted to stop in
and see my office

255
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:43,679
before we went to lunch.

256
00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,731
Just a few more weeks,
you'll be back full-time, huh?

257
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,225
Yeah.

258
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:50,528
Oh-oh. That wasn't a happy "yeah."

259
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,697
That was a "Hey, Leonard,
do you want to go to the gym?" yeah.

260
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,651
I've just been thinking
that maybe I'd rather

261
00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:58,577
stay home with the kids and be a mom.

262
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:00,867
Wow. That's big.

263
00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:02,073
I know.

264
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:05,660
Dr. Rostenkowski.
I'm sorry, I didn't know you were back.

265
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:08,212
I'm not
ljust came to meet Penny for lunch.

266
00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:10,632
Is there anything I can get you?
Coffee? Water?

267
00:13:10,707 --> 00:13:12,801
- No, I think we're just gonna...
- Coffee sounds good.

268
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:15,553
- Cold brew, almond milk?
- Perfect.

269
00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:17,214
Nothing, nothing for me.

270
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:18,469
<i>(CLEARS THROAT)</i>

271
00:13:19,549 --> 00:13:22,644
It's weird. I've been away so long
I don't miss any of this.

272
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:23,974
(PHONE BEEPS)

273
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:25,805
<i>MAN 1: Sorry to bother you.</i>

274
00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:27,890
<i>Dr. Lee heard you were here
and had a quick question.</i>

275
00:13:28,099 --> 00:13:29,726
Yeah, fine. Put him on.

276
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:34,531
Jerold, what's going on?
Hope you're not screwing up my research.

277
00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:38,698
You calling from a bike ride?
'Cause you're backpedaling hard.

278
00:13:39,569 --> 00:13:41,367
All right, fine. Email it over.
I'll take a look.

279
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:46,455
Mm-hmm.

280
00:13:46,534 --> 00:13:47,581
Oh, sorry. Where were we?

281
00:13:47,994 --> 00:13:49,496
Love your kids. Don't miss your job.

282
00:13:49,704 --> 00:13:51,001
Right, right.

283
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:55,293
There's nothing in the world
like holding your sleeping baby,

284
00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,378
knowing you make him
feel safe and then...

285
00:13:57,462 --> 00:13:59,510
Oh, good, you got the little cookies
I like.

286
00:14:00,631 --> 00:14:03,180
I wouldn't mind a cookie.
And he's gone. Okay.

287
00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:12,518
(KNOCKS)

288
00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:14,696
- Hey, Kripke.
- Hello, Hofstadter.

289
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:19,158
Why are you cleaning that out
yourself? Don't you have grad students?

290
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:23,697
Come on, I can't make my grad
students do every dirty job

291
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:27,330
or so I've been told in writing
by the head of Human Resources.

292
00:14:29,452 --> 00:14:31,375
Fair enough. Uh, so, look,

293
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:34,082
I'm here to ask you
to give Sheldon and Amy

294
00:14:34,165 --> 00:14:35,587
the Athenaeum for their wedding.

295
00:14:35,958 --> 00:14:37,050
(LAUGHS)

296
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:39,674
Why would I do that?

297
00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:45,052
Because deep down, Barry,
you're a really good guy.

298
00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:47,854
But am I?

299
00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:52,190
Fine. What's it gonna take?

300
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,324
Barry, I've come to ask one more...

301
00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:03,990
Leonard? Why are you doing that?

302
00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:07,578
Because deep down
Barry is not a good guy.

303
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:11,920
Uh, he's making you clean out
barrels of irradiated grease?

304
00:15:12,495 --> 00:15:13,792
Yeah. Uh...

305
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:16,875
I made a deal with him

306
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:19,336
to get you the Athenaeum
for your wedding.

307
00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:22,050
Why would you do that?

308
00:15:23,506 --> 00:15:25,975
Because I was a jerk
for lying to you before

309
00:15:26,050 --> 00:15:27,552
and besides, you're my best friend.

310
00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:29,308
I want you to have
the wedding of your dreams.

311
00:15:31,055 --> 00:15:32,602
On Mars?

312
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:38,571
Okay, I want Amy to have
the wedding of her dreams.

313
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:40,781
Well, thank you.

314
00:15:40,857 --> 00:15:43,030
But I don't want you to do this.

315
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:45,487
- No, it's okay.
- No, it's not.

316
00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:47,660
We're not going to let Barry win.

317
00:15:47,738 --> 00:15:48,830
Well, what are we going to do?

318
00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:52,160
We have a combined IQ of 360.

319
00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:55,372
Perhaps more if that radiation
gave you a super brain.

320
00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:58,541
You know what? You're right.

321
00:15:58,833 --> 00:16:02,428
If we work together we could
totally outsmart Barry Kripke.

322
00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:12,639
Leonard, my nose itches. What do I do?

323
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:19,479
(EXHALES) Boy. I really passed out hard.

324
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:20,771
Yeah, tell me about it.

325
00:16:20,855 --> 00:16:24,029
The kids could've screamed bloody murder
and you wouldn't have woken up.

326
00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:26,577
Which I know because they did.

327
00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:29,576
I'm sorry.

328
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:31,703
Why did I think I could
do this on my own?

329
00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:35,328
Hey, don't beat yourself up.
Parenting is hard.

330
00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:40,007
Like, I've seen and smelled things today
that I cannot unsee or unsmell.

331
00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:44,762
- Thanks for covering for me.
- No, I mean he only drinks milk.

332
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:47,010
Like, where are the colors coming from?

333
00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:53,562
- What time is it?
- Uh, it's almost 6:00.

334
00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:56,858
Okay. Bernadette's gonna be home soon.
We gotta divide and conquer.

335
00:16:56,974 --> 00:16:58,351
I'll make dinner. You watch the kids.

336
00:16:58,601 --> 00:17:00,603
- Kids are asleep.
- Great, then you make dinner.

337
00:17:04,774 --> 00:17:06,196
Hey, good news, Amy.

338
00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:08,320
We got the Athenaeum.

339
00:17:08,402 --> 00:17:11,121
Oh, my gosh. That's amazing.

340
00:17:11,197 --> 00:17:13,165
How'd you get Barry to change his mind?

341
00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:14,909
Well, I couldn't have clone it
without Leonard.

342
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:16,460
Boy, you should've seen us in there.

343
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:18,129
We were like Batman and Robin.

344
00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:21,294
Why do I have to be Robin?

345
00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:23,334
If you have to ask, you're Robin.

346
00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:26,337
What happened?

347
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:29,094
Well, we scrubbed out some
barrels of irradiated grease,

348
00:17:29,173 --> 00:17:32,973
rinsed off in a safety shower
and then told Barry Kripke what is what.

349
00:17:34,095 --> 00:17:35,267
And he just gave in?

350
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,265
Well, we agreed to invite him
to the wedding.

351
00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:39,108
Okay. No problem.

352
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:40,484
And he gets to bring a date.

353
00:17:40,935 --> 00:17:42,107
- Well, that's reasonable.
- Yeah.

354
00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:44,814
And if she charges by the hour,
we have to cover it.

355
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,740
What else did you agree to?

356
00:17:50,111 --> 00:17:53,991
Well, uh, you know
how Barry has the voice of an angel?

357
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,077
He is not singing at our wedding.

358
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,413
He only wants to sing Volare.

359
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,957
<i>Oh, Volare.</i>

360
00:18:05,042 --> 00:18:06,510
That's what he was saying.

361
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,509
Boy, I didn't, I did not get that.

362
00:18:09,714 --> 00:18:12,058
Guys, I appreciate everything you did,

363
00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:14,761
but we can find another location
that's just as good.

364
00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:17,472
Maybe the Japanese garden
or the planetarium.

365
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:20,976
(GASPS) The planetarium.
I hadn't thought about that.

366
00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:22,230
That's even better.

367
00:18:22,476 --> 00:18:23,568
Wait, what?

368
00:18:24,020 --> 00:18:26,022
I scrubbed sludge for you.

369
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:29,109
Uh, I may be slightly radioactive.

370
00:18:29,692 --> 00:18:31,410
Oh, you're exaggerating.

371
00:18:31,694 --> 00:18:33,037
Don't let him touch the silverware.

372
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:42,751
Why is Raj asleep on our couch?

373
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:44,882
I needed some help so he came by,

374
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:46,630
played with the kids,
read them some stories,

375
00:18:46,709 --> 00:18:48,586
put them down for their nap
and made dinner.

376
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:51,046
What'd you do?

377
00:18:52,173 --> 00:18:53,220
Ate dinner.

378
00:18:55,343 --> 00:18:58,096
Okay, look, I don't think I'm cut out
to be a stay-at-home dad.

379
00:18:58,346 --> 00:19:01,270
And since you want to,
you should stay home.

380
00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:03,772
I do definitely want to,

381
00:19:03,851 --> 00:19:06,900
but I know how much this means
to you and it was just one day.

382
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,856
So, don't give up.

383
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:13,324
You don't want to stay home, either.
Do you?

384
00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:15,158
When I went by the office they gave me

385
00:19:15,237 --> 00:19:17,205
coffee and cookies
and no one peed on me.

386
00:19:19,784 --> 00:19:21,661
I miss that so much.

387
00:19:22,411 --> 00:19:26,712
Well, I love the kids,
but I also love my job.

388
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,876
And sleep.

389
00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:32,092
I know. I took a two-hour nap
on the couch in my office.

390
00:19:32,213 --> 00:19:34,807
I took a three-hour nap on
the floor in the living room.

391
00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:39,224
- How do you feel now?
- Honestly? Still tired.

392
00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:42,014
Me, too.

393
00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:45,230
-L love you.
-l love you, too.

394
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:46,735
And we'll figure this all out.

395
00:19:47,061 --> 00:19:48,108
Yeah.

396
00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:51,565
Everyone's asleep.

397
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,911
You want to head upstairs and,

398
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,908
(CHUCKLES) you know.

399
00:19:58,823 --> 00:20:00,166
Let's just do it right here.

400
00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:03,123
Oh-oh, I like the way you think.

401
00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:12,294
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

402
00:20:30,855 --> 00:20:31,856
English - SDH