1 00:00:01,720 --> 00:00:03,520 Previously on The Big Bang Theory... 2 00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:07,590 Can you believe our little lamb is finally getting married? 3 00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:08,716 He can't believe it. 4 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:11,880 And neither can I. 5 00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:14,440 Hi, Dad. How you doing? 6 00:00:18,240 --> 00:00:20,118 By the power vested in me 7 00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:23,351 by even-you-can-perform-weddings-dot-com 8 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,711 I now pronounce you husband and wife. 9 00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:29,910 You may kiss the bride. 10 00:00:38,720 --> 00:00:39,949 Good morning, wife. 11 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:44,279 Good morning, husband. 12 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,512 - I can't believe we're actually married. - It's official. 13 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:51,195 According to tradition, we should hang the bed sheets outside 14 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:53,152 so the villagers can see that we consummated. 15 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,336 I don't think that that's appropriate, 16 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:58,477 considering where we're starting our honeymoon. 17 00:00:58,800 --> 00:01:00,200 Oh, I suppose you're right. 18 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:05,394 Although when you think about it, 19 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:08,200 Lego is the perfect metaphor for marital congress. 20 00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:11,079 Two pieces that interlock with a satisfying snap. 21 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,796 Oh, that's the sound you were making. 22 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:18,109 Oh! I almost forgot, 23 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:21,193 while you were sleeping, I ordered room service. 24 00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:22,280 Really? 25 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:24,556 Voila! 26 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:28,597 You thought it was going to be food, didn't you? 27 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:33,517 Our whole universe was in a hot dense state 28 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:36,877 Then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started... 29 00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:37,880 Wait! 30 00:01:37,881 --> 00:01:38,839 The earth began to cool 31 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:40,115 The autotrophs began to drool 32 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:41,634 Neanderthals developed tools 33 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:43,518 We built a wall We built the pyramids 34 00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:46,399 Math, science, history Unraveling the mystery 35 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:47,960 It all started with the Big Bang! 36 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:49,080 Bang! 37 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:59,279 Is it nice having Sheldon and Amy away on their honeymoon? 38 00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:02,234 Yeah, because now Leonard and I get all this alone time. 39 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:03,856 But you're not alone, we're here. 40 00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:05,837 Yes. Yes, you are. 41 00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:08,896 Would you like us to leave 42 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:11,576 so you and Leonard can talk about all the things you have in common? 43 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:13,160 Ha-ha! She called your bluff. 44 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:17,120 So, something pretty cool happened. 45 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:19,160 Channel 3 asked me to be on the news tomorrow night 46 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:20,520 to talk about the meteor shower. 47 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:21,680 - Oh, that's great. - Hey. 48 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:22,680 Congratulations. 49 00:02:22,681 --> 00:02:24,417 You know, that's how Neil deGrasse Tyson got his start. 50 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:26,159 He went from the Hayden Planetarium 51 00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:27,674 to guesting on the local news 52 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:29,911 to ruining everyone's favorite movies on the Internet. 53 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:32,576 And now it's happening to me. 54 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:34,080 Ooh! I should probably make a list 55 00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:36,880 of all the scientific inaccuracies in Mamma Mia! 2. 56 00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:41,075 You're gonna go on live TV and admit you've seen that movie? 57 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:43,280 Hey, your husband's the one who took me. 58 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:47,631 Meryl Streep and Cher? Yeah, I saw it. 59 00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:53,200 Sounds like someone's in there. 60 00:02:53,720 --> 00:02:55,712 God, what if Sheldon and Amy are getting robbed? 61 00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,153 Or worse, what if they're back early? 62 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:03,160 They're not, they just posted a picture in front of the Statue of Liberty. 63 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:04,515 - Real or Lego? - Lego. 64 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:08,320 So what should we do? Should someone go check it out? 65 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:11,474 I would, but I gotta be on TV tomorrow, gotta protect the money. 66 00:03:15,161 --> 00:03:16,657 Oh, yeah. Someone's definitely in there. 67 00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:18,319 Okay, let's go into our apartment, 68 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:19,496 we'll lock the door, we'll call the police... 69 00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:21,159 Hello? Anyone in there? 70 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,157 - Yes? - Oh. Mr. Fowler, 71 00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:27,576 sorry, we didn't know you were here. 72 00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:30,069 We actually thought someone was breaking in. 73 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:31,753 And we were ready to take them down. 74 00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:36,712 - Amy asked me to water her plants. - She doesn't have any plants. 75 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:38,749 Oh. 76 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:42,629 Well, you called me on a lie. Have a good day. 77 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:51,040 That was weird, right? 78 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,032 Was it? I honestly can't tell anymore. 79 00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:56,118 Hey, did you even see Mamma Mia! 1? 80 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,112 Didn't need to. The sequel stands on its own. 81 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:13,470 Here you go. 82 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:17,158 If you need any recommendations while visiting New York, 83 00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:19,357 please don't hesitate to contact me. 84 00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:21,318 Well, it is our honeymoon. 85 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:22,993 So we are going to be quite busy. 86 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:24,514 Got it. 87 00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:26,910 Harry Potter play, parts one and two. 88 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,753 And tomorrow, a tour of the sights 89 00:04:29,840 --> 00:04:32,958 where Nikola Tesla lived, worked and slowly went crazy. 90 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,071 And of course, coitus. 91 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:39,000 Ah. 92 00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:43,199 Enjoy New York. And I guess, coitus. 93 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:51,956 Really, Sheldon, you wanna do it again? 94 00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:55,716 Don't act surprised, it's clearly marked on the schedule. 95 00:04:56,640 --> 00:05:00,236 Now, shall we "steam the wrinkles out of our wizard robes" 96 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:03,319 or "make vigorous, socially-sanctioned love"? 97 00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,440 Either way, I can check something off my to-do list. 98 00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:09,353 "Socially-sanct..." Oh, wow. Yeah, there it is, right there. 99 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:14,960 Uh, hurry, Raj is on next. 100 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:18,519 I can't believe they canceled Vampire Diaries, but they'll show this. 101 00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:21,916 This is the news. 102 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:27,756 And that was a woman torn between two hunky vampires, what is your point? 103 00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:32,918 Larry! I know you're in there! 104 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:36,200 - Is that Amy's mom? - Let me in. 105 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:38,678 Let me in! 106 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,480 Either that or the Big Bad Wolf. 107 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,320 Larry! 108 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:49,713 Mrs. Fowler, are you okay? 109 00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:52,760 Oh, I'm okay, it's my husband you should worry about. 110 00:05:52,840 --> 00:05:53,910 Oh, we do. 111 00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:57,077 Larry, come on! 112 00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:58,280 I don't think he's in there. 113 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:05,312 I mean, he came by to water the imaginary plants, but then he left. 114 00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,033 You're so naive. 115 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:10,794 Blondie here is gonna chew you up and spit you out. 116 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:13,875 Well, don't tell him. 117 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:18,310 Come on. You have an extra key, open it up. 118 00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:21,751 All right, but I'm telling you, he's not in there. 119 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,256 There. See? 120 00:06:27,280 --> 00:06:31,035 Oh, he's in here, I can smell his Axe Body Spray. 121 00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:34,480 He wears Axe Body Spray? 122 00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:36,199 You happy? You smell like Amy's dad. 123 00:06:39,240 --> 00:06:40,640 Larry! 124 00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:42,074 - Come on. - Uh-uh-uh... 125 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:43,560 Shouldn't we mind our own business? 126 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:45,877 Wow. Sometimes it's like you don't know me at all. 127 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,350 See, he's not here. 128 00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:52,560 You don't know him like I do. 129 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:55,073 To be fair, we don't know either of you. 130 00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:00,270 Satisfied? 131 00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:08,433 Oh, yeah, now I smell him. 132 00:07:11,480 --> 00:07:14,439 Man, that is one hot weather girl. 133 00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:17,759 How come if I say that, I get in trouble? 134 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:20,714 You wanna say it? You can say it. 135 00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:29,430 Nice try. 136 00:07:30,920 --> 00:07:33,800 You're gonna have to find some other way to not have sex with me tonight. 137 00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:36,591 And it's not "weather girl," it's weather woman. 138 00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:41,073 And with us today to talk about the upcoming meteor shower 139 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:42,480 and the best places to view it, 140 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:46,793 Caltech astrophysicist Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali. 141 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:48,474 Thank you for being here. 142 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:49,960 Thank you for having me. 143 00:07:50,040 --> 00:07:52,271 I guess Neil deGrasse Tyson was unavailable. 144 00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:54,556 Yeah. 145 00:07:57,880 --> 00:07:58,840 What do you mean, "Yeah"? 146 00:07:58,841 --> 00:08:03,551 Not important. So, what can we expect to see from this meteor shower? 147 00:08:04,520 --> 00:08:07,194 Well, I think you can count on a lot of flaming gas, 148 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:09,176 which is what you would've gotten from your first choice, 149 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:10,475 Neil deGrasse Tyson. 150 00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:13,517 Pull up, Raj, pull up. 151 00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:18,630 Sounds like there's no love lost between you and Dr. Tyson. 152 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:20,200 Oh, no, I love Neil. 153 00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:23,993 I mean, not as much as Neil loves Neil, but who does, right? 154 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:27,678 I wanna look away, but I can't. 155 00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:31,800 Oh. I am told we are out of time... 156 00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:35,712 having learned nothing about meteor showers 157 00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:37,951 and too much about Dr. Koothrappali. 158 00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:39,670 Thank you. 159 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:49,991 You know what I love about Broadway theater? It's so interactive. 160 00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:51,560 Uh-huh. 161 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,274 You're so close to the actors, it's like you're in the play. 162 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:56,360 Uh-huh. 163 00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:59,355 When you yell, "Harry, watch out!" he looks right at you. 164 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:02,390 No, and not just Harry, everyone on stage. 165 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:05,056 At the risk of sounding redundant... 166 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:06,080 Uh-huh. 167 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:08,918 All right, well, it's a bit late, 168 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:12,072 but I did block out the rest of the evening for conjugal relations. 169 00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:13,796 Should we shower? 170 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,714 I mean before, not during. That's how you fall and break a hip. 171 00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:19,314 You know, I'm a little jet laggy, 172 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:21,000 maybe we can revisit this in the morning. 173 00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:22,356 Oh, no can do. 174 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:25,239 If we miss tonight, it's not scheduled until Thursday at 6:00. 175 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:27,158 And that will have to be no frills 176 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:29,120 'cause we've got a 6:30 reservation at Benihana. 177 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:33,270 Sheldon, do we really have to do this on a schedule? 178 00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:36,113 Are you suggesting spontaneity? 179 00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:38,239 Uh... I guess, yeah. 180 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:41,958 So now that we're married, sex can occur at any time? 181 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,997 Like, we could be brushing our teeth 182 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,800 and suddenly your minty-fresh tongue is in my mouth? No, thank you. 183 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:50,113 Really? Would it be so bad to mix it up a little? 184 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:52,510 Mix it up? Who are you, Betty Crocker? 185 00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,229 - Where are you going? - To take a shower. 186 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,392 Now that sex can happen at any time, I always have to be ready. 187 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:02,000 I should probably live under a waterfall. 188 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:05,056 Well, you don't have to worry about sex happening tonight. 189 00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:06,080 Oh... 190 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:08,357 Well, thanks, but I'm still gonna rinse off. 191 00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:10,080 I touched a lot of stuff in the gift shop. 192 00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:18,156 No message, no note, who would do that? What kind of husband... 193 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:19,959 If you let him talk, maybe you'll find out. 194 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:22,996 Fine. Larry? 195 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,236 Well, there you go, what more can he say? 196 00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:30,470 Let's go home. 197 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:33,589 I think I'll stay. 198 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:36,760 Well, if you're going to stay, then I'll stay. 199 00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:40,196 All right, well, you know who doesn't need to stay? 200 00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:42,317 Us. Come on. 201 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:47,677 Penny? 202 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:54,713 I don't think those two are gonna make it. 203 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:04,919 Poor Mr. Fowler, I really feel sorry for the little guy. 204 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,832 I know. After they had Amy, 205 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:09,037 she should've just eaten him and been done with it. 206 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:13,680 Look at you retaining facts from a nature show. 207 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,476 I know. Really. What did he ever see in her? 208 00:11:17,560 --> 00:11:20,314 He's so, so sweet, and she's such a ballbuster. 209 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:22,437 Some guys think strong women are sexy. 210 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:24,320 Yeah, but they seem to have nothing in common. 211 00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:27,155 Yeah, but sometimes opposites attract. 212 00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:32,511 Wait, wait, are you saying we are like them? 213 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:34,960 I don't know, maybe a little. 214 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:40,553 So you're the sweet, quiet one and I'm Amy's mom? 215 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:42,040 Is that what you're saying? 216 00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:54,475 Hey, check out what Neil deGrasse Tyson just tweeted. 217 00:11:54,560 --> 00:11:57,678 "I've been informed that some random, attention-seeking nobody 218 00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:59,672 took a cheap shot at me on the local news." 219 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:03,235 That's me. Guys, he's talking about me. 220 00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:07,599 You know, I cut you a lot of slack 'cause you come from another country, 221 00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:09,797 but you've been here a long time. 222 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,757 Raj, you need to apologize to Dr. Tyson. 223 00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:16,118 Why? This could be good for me. 224 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:18,795 Everybody loves a good Twitter feud. 225 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:22,112 Neil and I could be the new Katy Perry and Taylor Swift. 226 00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:24,536 Come on, Raj, you're better than this. 227 00:12:24,560 --> 00:12:27,678 Hmm. Leave room for dessert, 'cause I'm gonna make you eat those words. 228 00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:30,914 "Dear Dr. Tyson, 229 00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:36,478 much like epithelial tissue, it appears I've gotten under your skin." 230 00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:40,800 iPhone drop, but I won't, 'cause I don't have AppleCare. 231 00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:45,516 What'd he say? 232 00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:49,310 "Nice try, genius. The skin is epithelial tissue." 233 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:54,556 Oh, it's on. He's Katy, I'm T-Swift. 234 00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:02,200 What're you gonna do, he's from another country. 235 00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:08,718 And here we have the former hotel 236 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:12,350 where Tesla perfected the three-phase alternating current motor. 237 00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:15,111 - That's wrong. I'm gonna say something. - Don't. 238 00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:18,240 Well, then how will everyone know I'm the smartest boy here? 239 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:20,636 Just let it go. 240 00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:24,559 Is everything all right? You seem testy this morning. 241 00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:25,790 I'm not testy. 242 00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:28,349 I'll have to take your word for it, there's no test for testy. 243 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:33,191 Is it possible that you're sexually frustrated? 244 00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:34,794 Okay, now I'm testy. 245 00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:37,712 If you had adhered to my coital schedule, 246 00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:40,315 your brain would be floating on a sea of oxytocin right now. 247 00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:43,400 Don't talk to me about my brain. I'm a neurobiologist. 248 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:46,150 Then you should know the benefits of the special hug 249 00:13:46,240 --> 00:13:47,469 that grownups give each other. 250 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:51,680 Sheldon, everybody's listening. 251 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:55,071 Well, of course they're listening, we're interesting. Unlike that guy. 252 00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:58,440 I'm walking away from you. 253 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:07,634 I'm only recently married. Do I stay here? Do I follow? 254 00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:08,720 Say something useful. 255 00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:18,634 Morning, sunshine. 256 00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:24,718 So, I see you're making espresso. 257 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:29,153 Yep, just need that extra jolt for a successful day of ballbusting. 258 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,078 Really? I don't think you do. 259 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,240 You know, you compared us to the strangest couple we know. 260 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:39,551 And we know Amy and Sheldon, Howard and Bernadette, 261 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:41,393 Raj and his twitchy little dog. 262 00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:44,992 I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. 263 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:47,276 Because it wasn't nice or because it wasn't true? 264 00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:48,589 It's not true. 265 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,754 Mrs. Fowler is an angry, vindictive woman. 266 00:14:51,840 --> 00:14:55,231 Whereas you are warm and loving, 267 00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:57,190 quick to forgive. 268 00:14:57,760 --> 00:14:59,672 - Oh, please. - I'm serious. 269 00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:01,433 And I'm nothing like Amy's dad. 270 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:04,194 He's a mousy little man who can't stand up for himself. 271 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:10,120 My point is, you're not like her, so we're not like them. 272 00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:13,955 Thirty years from now, are you gonna hide from me 273 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:15,235 because I'm so scary? 274 00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:18,196 Hey, I don't think you're scary. 275 00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,559 Yes, I flinch when you make sudden moves, 276 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,640 but that says more about my childhood than you. 277 00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:27,400 Aw! 278 00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:36,120 - Your turn. - Hang on, 279 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:39,034 I'm checking to see if Neil replied to my latest smackdown. 280 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:42,675 Really, don't you think this Twitter feud is a little silly? 281 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:44,719 Absolutely not, 282 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:48,237 it's two respected scientists debating opposing views in a public forum. 283 00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:51,195 You called him Mike Tyson's little sister. 284 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:54,877 Yeah. And now Mike Tyson's mad at me, too. 285 00:15:57,560 --> 00:16:00,280 Raj, you're not going to impress anyone by attacking him. 286 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,475 Oh, Bernadette, you sound so old right now. 287 00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:12,070 He said he needs a break, and I'm too much for him. 288 00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:13,873 Oh, I'm sure he didn't mean that. 289 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:15,874 He said I'm overbearing. 290 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:20,556 Oh, please, you're just the right amount of bearing. 291 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:24,079 Look, I know he loves you. 292 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,470 If you just give him some space, I'm sure he'll come back. 293 00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:29,635 - You really think so? - Yeah, I do. 294 00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:33,360 - You're a good person, Penny. - Oh... 295 00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:37,192 I hope we get to spend lots of time together. 296 00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:41,876 Me, too. 297 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:46,869 - Yes. - Hit the road. 298 00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:49,916 - But... - Now! 299 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:52,912 - Can I get my stuff? - Be quick about it. 300 00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:02,633 - Hello. - Hello. 301 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:04,515 I brought you two hot dogs. 302 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:07,080 Aren't you gonna eat one? 303 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:09,199 From a street cart? Are you crazy? 304 00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:11,594 I'm amazed that I'm holding them. 305 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:14,200 I'm not really hungry. 306 00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:19,235 You realize that I'm not a particularly physical person? 307 00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:22,433 - I know. - When I was little 308 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:24,720 and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grow up, 309 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:27,599 I'd always say "A brain in a jar." 310 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:29,909 Sure. 311 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,196 Yeah, but I wanna be a good husband to you, 312 00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:34,437 and intimacy is a part of that. 313 00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:37,676 Please put those down. 314 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:42,513 I'm just worried that if I don't schedule our bedroom endeavors, 315 00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:44,000 then I may not think about them, 316 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:46,470 and you'll grow cold and distant 317 00:17:47,120 --> 00:17:50,318 and seek solace in the arms of a heavily-muscled longshoreman. 318 00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:53,433 Where would I find a longshoreman? 319 00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:55,394 Along the shore. It's in the name. 320 00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:02,351 Sheldon, I could never be with anybody but you. 321 00:18:03,360 --> 00:18:04,635 That's good to know. 322 00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:07,633 I wouldn't want to fight a man who's brave enough to touch a fish. 323 00:18:10,960 --> 00:18:12,679 How's this for a compromise, 324 00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:17,275 make all the schedules you want, just don't tell me about them. 325 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,076 Excellent. 326 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:22,637 I'll create an algorithm that'll generate a pseudo-random schedule. 327 00:18:22,720 --> 00:18:25,679 And do you know why it won't be a true random schedule? 328 00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:28,837 Because the generation of true random numbers 329 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:31,395 remains an unsolved problem in computer science. 330 00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:32,596 Come with me. 331 00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:34,256 - Where are we going? - To the hotel room. 332 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:37,200 And when we get there, I'm gonna need you to say that again, except naked. 333 00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:56,390 Go for Dr. K. 334 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,595 - Is this Rajesh Koothrappali? - Yes. Who is this? 335 00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:02,514 Neil deGrasse Tyson. 336 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:07,517 Uh, wow. 337 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,239 How fun is this Twitter thing, huh? 338 00:19:12,120 --> 00:19:13,120 You think you're funny? 339 00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:16,113 I'm not Seinfeld funny, but I did an open mic night once... 340 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:17,350 You're not funny. 341 00:19:18,480 --> 00:19:20,320 Yeah, that's what they said at the Chuckle Hut. 342 00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:22,476 How about this, 343 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,799 I've got a book signing at Vroman's in Pasadena next week. 344 00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:28,634 Why don't you come by and say some of those things to my face? 345 00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:30,196 Oh-ho-ho-ho... 346 00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:31,873 No, but thanks for the invite. 347 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:36,560 Smart move. And the next time you pick up your phone, 348 00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:39,997 remember I'm the guy who kicked Pluto out of the solar system. 349 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:44,120 And it deserved it, sir. Thank you, bye-bye. 350 00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:47,639 Well, that was fun. 351 00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:52,230 Let's see who else needs a deGrasse-kickin'. 352 00:19:57,160 --> 00:19:58,355 Bill Nye Science Guy. 353 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:03,234 Hey, Bill, Neil Tyson, we've gotta talk.