1 00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:05,434 Ooh, it's freezing out here. 2 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:08,316 Would you like me to heat things up? 3 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:11,120 No, I wanna get in the hot tub before I loose a toe. 4 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:13,800 Oh. 5 00:00:14,040 --> 00:00:15,040 That is bright. 6 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:17,675 Yeah, new neighbor put in floodlights. 7 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:20,320 So, shall we? 8 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:24,718 No, I don't wanna take my robe off under a spotlight. 9 00:00:24,960 --> 00:00:26,553 This is a candle body. 10 00:00:27,240 --> 00:00:28,435 Howdy, neighbors! 11 00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:30,796 We haven't met yet, I'm Andy. 12 00:00:30,880 --> 00:00:33,156 - Hi. - Oh, hello. Nice to meet you. 13 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:36,837 You know, your new balcony kinda looks right over our fence. 14 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:38,416 You might wanna put up some trees. 15 00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:39,635 We can see everything. 16 00:00:41,160 --> 00:00:43,834 You can, but it's okay if you don't. 17 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,992 So, can you turn your lights off? 18 00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:49,673 Sorry, they're motion-sensored. 19 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:50,840 They'll go off in a minute. 20 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:52,434 Just try to stay still. 21 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,232 What are we gonna do about this? 22 00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:58,638 I say we wait until his lights go off 23 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:01,679 and then I make hot, motionless love to you. 24 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:08,231 Don't move. It's go time. 25 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:14,717 Our whole universe was in a hot dense state 26 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,599 Then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started... 27 00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:18,638 Wait! 28 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:19,835 The earth began to cool 29 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:21,240 The autotrophs began to drool 30 00:01:21,320 --> 00:01:22,800 Neanderthals developed tools 31 00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:24,712 We built a wall We built the pyramids 32 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:27,679 Math, science, history Unraveling the mystery 33 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:29,797 It all started with the Big Bang! 34 00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:30,880 Bang! 35 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:40,274 And his new balcony looks right down on our hot tub, 36 00:01:40,360 --> 00:01:42,317 which meant we couldn't do anything. 37 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:45,440 So, you gave your kids Benadryl for nothing? 38 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:50,271 Why do I share with you? You're such a yenta. 39 00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:54,513 Are we done talking about Howard's failed conjugal relations? 40 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:57,274 I have an actual Nobel Prize crisis to deal with. 41 00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,216 Has anything changed since the last time we talked about it? 42 00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:00,536 - No. - Is there anything you can do about it? 43 00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:03,394 - No. - Then shut up or go wait in the car. 44 00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:08,594 Excuse me, remember you all came here to check out my cool new laser? 45 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:10,632 Oh, right. I'm gonna go wait in the car. 46 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:14,311 Okay, the best part is that it's europium-based, so... 47 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:19,236 And then Andy said if we want privacy, we should plant some trees. 48 00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:20,616 The only way I know how to do that 49 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:23,394 is to give a dollar and a tree shows up in Israel. 50 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:27,439 - Okay. Anyway, so because it's... - Hey. 51 00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:29,751 I need some help with a meteorite I found. 52 00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:31,354 Oh, I'd be happy to. 53 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:34,717 Oh, no, I meant Raj. I really need an astrophysicist. 54 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:35,840 Wow. 55 00:02:35,841 --> 00:02:37,673 This is exactly like a dream I had, 56 00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:39,917 except in the dream, you're Gal Gadot. 57 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:45,271 I don't really have dreams, when I sleep or in life. 58 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:50,197 Anyway, I X-rayed this meteorite 59 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:53,239 and it looks like there's some sort of organic signature inside of it, 60 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:54,816 but I could really use another opinion. 61 00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:56,440 All right, great, let's go check it out. 62 00:02:56,720 --> 00:02:58,916 Cool, I'm gonna stay here and show Howard how... 63 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,000 I wanna see it. 64 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:04,798 Okay. Well, thanks for stopping by. 65 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:10,318 Screw them, that's cool. 66 00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:14,993 Hey, I'm not sure we're in the right line. 67 00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:16,639 Is this for the City Zoning Office? 68 00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:21,112 Yes, it is. Or as we call it here, "the zone zone." 69 00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:23,520 No, we don't. 70 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:29,397 That's Linda. Ignore her, she's going through the change. 71 00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:34,235 - Now, how can I help you? - Our neighbor built a balcony 72 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,336 that looks right into our backyard, and we're trying to see 73 00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:37,536 if there's anything we could do about it. 74 00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:39,120 Well, you have come to the right place. 75 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:41,336 You know, a lot of people handle this type of thing online, 76 00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:43,875 but I always say nothing beats the human touch. 77 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:47,096 Oh, but don't worry. I'm not gonna actually touch you. 78 00:03:47,120 --> 00:03:49,874 We had quite the informative meeting on that. 79 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,956 We just want a little privacy in our backyard. 80 00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:55,320 You know, for... 81 00:03:58,320 --> 00:03:59,834 Maybe we should've done this online. 82 00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:03,355 No, no, no, no. The zone zone is a safe zone. 83 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:05,512 Stop saying "zone zone!" 84 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:08,992 So, is there anything we can do? 85 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:11,595 Absolutely. Do you know if they have permits for the balcony? 86 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:13,680 No, we were hoping you could check. 87 00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:15,877 I certainly can. I just need you to fill out a form. 88 00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:18,919 And we have them available in Armenian, Chinese, Cambodian, 89 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:21,720 English, Farsi, Korean, Spanish and Vietnamese. 90 00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:25,432 Well, English, obviously. 91 00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:29,871 Well, we're not allowed to presume. That was a whole other meeting. 92 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:33,792 So, we just fill out the form and that's it? 93 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:36,073 Oh, no. No, you need to fill it out, 94 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:38,736 and then you need to bring it down to the Office of Code Compliance. 95 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,320 Now, if your neighbors don't have a permit, 96 00:04:41,400 --> 00:04:43,936 you can file an official complaint. But if they do have a permit, 97 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:46,794 then you have to make the case that the balcony constitutes a nuisance, 98 00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:48,712 an encumbrance or an encroachment. 99 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:49,856 And you have to decide which, 100 00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:51,792 because they are three totally separate forms. 101 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,176 This is starting to seem like more trouble than it's worth. 102 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:57,953 I know, right? 103 00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:04,677 - You okay? - Yeah. 104 00:05:05,280 --> 00:05:07,480 Great, 'cause you just bought that whole row of Batmans. 105 00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:09,920 Sorry. I... 106 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:15,752 Now you bought Aquaman. Good choice. 107 00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:20,517 If you want cold medicine, Stuart has the entire run of DayQuils, 108 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:23,320 including the rare "DayQuilt" misprint from 1996. 109 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:26,600 What can I say, I'm a collector. 110 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:30,229 Thanks, but I'm fine, I think it's just allergies. 111 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:31,595 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 112 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:33,797 Hey. Heads-up, if that Aquaman feels wet, 113 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:35,951 it's not a gimmick, Leonard sneezed on it. 114 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:40,391 - You sick? - Ah, it's just allergies. 115 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:44,110 Oh, so, check it out, this meteorite that Bert found is really cool. 116 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:46,040 We did a spectrographic analysis and there's... 117 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:47,878 There's definitely something going on inside. 118 00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:52,155 Whoa, uh, hey, if you want, we could use my new laser to cut it open. 119 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:55,918 Uh, thanks, but Bert's got this water-cooled, diamond-bladed saw. 120 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:59,558 Well, sure, but with my laser, you'd get a thinner slice, 121 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:01,120 which would make for a better sample. 122 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:02,196 Whoa, whoa. 123 00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:05,273 You're not gonna cut open a meteor, are you? 124 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:07,957 Have you not learned anything from comic books? 125 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:12,355 Space viruses, pod people? 126 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:14,994 I sell nothing but warnings. 127 00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:19,990 Calm down, Stuart. You're being a little crazy. 128 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:21,833 Oh, is he? Is he being crazy? 129 00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:24,160 Or is he the only one around here who's making any sense? 130 00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,513 It's nice they found each other. 131 00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:33,470 Yeah. So, anyway, you wanna use my laser? 132 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,473 Eh, sorry, it's kinda Bert's thing and he wants to do it his way. 133 00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:39,832 Okay. Yeah, that's cool. 134 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,960 Just seems dumb to not use the laser. 135 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:48,154 Not as dumb as unleashing a plague on mankind, but, hey, what do we know? 136 00:06:49,480 --> 00:06:50,596 Literally nothing. 137 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,349 We spent half the day down at the City Planning Office 138 00:06:57,440 --> 00:06:58,999 and didn't solve a thing. 139 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:00,720 Now we have to go back tomorrow. 140 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:03,838 The Planning Office? You lucky ducks. 141 00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:07,760 Yeah, this one made me go for ice cream and talk about her day. 142 00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:09,718 Spoiler alert, it was fine. 143 00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:14,560 Uh, it wasn't fine, I got trapped in an elevator. 144 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:18,718 I may have missed a few details, the bottom of my cone was drippy. 145 00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:23,916 So, now we have to download all these forms and fill them out. 146 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:26,231 We get it. Your life is great. Stop rubbing it in. 147 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:28,870 Yeah, quit it. 148 00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:36,075 Is one of the forms the 599 B/C? Because if so, it has a doozy of typo. 149 00:07:36,640 --> 00:07:38,416 - I don't know. - All right. Well, I don't wanna spoil 150 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:41,797 anything but you might wanna start practicing your "siglature." 151 00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:46,576 Sheldon, if you like this stuff, 152 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,920 - why don't you come and do it with us? - Or instead of us? 153 00:07:49,801 --> 00:07:51,377 Do you mean it? No, no, wait, it's too late. 154 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:52,629 You can't take it back. Yes. 155 00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:57,400 Amy, looks like the elevator might have been the high point of your day. 156 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:00,550 Where's Raj? 157 00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:02,154 Oh, he's working with Bert. 158 00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:04,755 They're probably cutting their stupid meteorite open 159 00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:06,553 with their stupid diamond saw. 160 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:09,309 - You okay? - Yeah. 161 00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:11,915 I'm just a little run-down. It might be a head cold. 162 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:16,480 Purell. 163 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:19,080 Purell. 164 00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:21,120 Purell. 165 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:23,470 Purell. 166 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:27,670 Can I top anybody off? 167 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:33,394 It's just so frustrating. 168 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,870 I know my laser would be way more efficient. 169 00:08:35,960 --> 00:08:39,078 They're gonna lose so much meteorite due to kerf loss. 170 00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:40,120 Mmm. 171 00:08:40,121 --> 00:08:42,919 I'm sorry your friends won't let you play kerf with them. 172 00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:48,595 Don't make it sound childish. It's the scientific word for dust. 173 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:50,514 What was wrong with dust? 174 00:08:52,480 --> 00:08:54,790 Are you sure you're not just a little jealous? 175 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:57,714 Uh, no, it's just my way is better but they won't even consider it. 176 00:08:58,200 --> 00:08:59,395 Well, it's their loss. 177 00:08:59,480 --> 00:09:01,856 Look, why don't you go to bed? I'll run out and get you some medicine. 178 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,641 Oh, it's okay, Stuart gave me some when I was at the comic book store. 179 00:09:04,680 --> 00:09:07,036 Really? You're taking medicine from Stuart? 180 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,080 Doesn't he need, like, all of it? 181 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:12,960 Mmm. He's got plenty. 182 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,832 His pill caddy is, like, this big. 183 00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:18,496 All right. Well, why don't you go to bed? I'll sleep out here on the couch. 184 00:09:18,520 --> 00:09:20,637 No, no, no. You take the bed, I'll stay out here. 185 00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:22,279 Even better. Sweet dreams, snot-bag. 186 00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:29,715 See what I'm talking about? 187 00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:33,193 Oh, yes. Oh, that is textbook encroachment. 188 00:09:33,560 --> 00:09:35,597 And I know because I have the textbook. 189 00:09:37,240 --> 00:09:38,356 First edition. 190 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:41,919 Watch what happens when you move. 191 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:43,640 Oh! 192 00:09:43,641 --> 00:09:45,757 Oh, boy. You weren't kidding. 193 00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:48,480 Oh, those are ten thousand lumens if they're a lumen. 194 00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:51,880 Well, you know what they say, when life give you lumens, 195 00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:53,440 make lumen-ade. 196 00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:55,956 Was that a joke? 197 00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:57,680 Yes. 198 00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:00,630 Based on the premise that lumen sounds like lemon? 199 00:10:02,360 --> 00:10:03,360 Yes. 200 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:05,880 That's hilarious. 201 00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:10,871 Okay, what is the setback on property lines in this neighborhood? 202 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:12,160 Oh, I don't know. 203 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:14,640 Well, it must be on the permit from when you built your deck. 204 00:10:14,920 --> 00:10:17,719 Uh, yeah, my dad built this, we didn't do the whole permit thing. 205 00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:22,109 Here we go. 206 00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,590 Are you saying I'm standing on an unpermitted deck? 207 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:29,554 It's been here for years, Sheldon. It's fine. 208 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:30,936 How did the inspector not flag this 209 00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:32,960 when he came to check out your bathroom renovation? 210 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:40,316 Are you telling me that I have showered in an uninspected bathroom? 211 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,993 You've showered in our house? 212 00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:44,555 You made me hold your children. What did you expect me to do? 213 00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:56,839 You think you know people. 214 00:10:58,560 --> 00:11:00,438 You do know them, Sheldon. 215 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:02,876 Yeah, but do we? Do we really know them? 216 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:06,109 Yes. 217 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:09,800 They're rulebreakers, Amy. And you know what we do with rulebreakers? 218 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:11,833 Complain about them to our spouse 219 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,912 until she's ready to drive into oncoming traffic? 220 00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:17,998 You can't cross a double yellow line. What is this, The Purge? 221 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:20,680 So, I guess you're not gonna help them. 222 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:24,031 Oh, I'm gonna help them. Help them get on the right side of Johnny Law. 223 00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:27,079 Oh, you can't turn them in. 224 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:28,336 The city is gonna make them rip out 225 00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:29,999 all the work they've done and do it over. 226 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:31,673 It would be the end of your friendship. 227 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:33,672 What choice do I have? These are the rules. 228 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:35,240 Sheldon, I am begging you. 229 00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,256 - Please don't do this. - You know who doesn't get permits 230 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:39,033 for their decks? Animals. 231 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,080 Animals don't have decks. 232 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:45,039 Yeah, oh, really? I have one word for you. Beavers. 233 00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:54,080 Bert? Raj? 234 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,000 Huh. 235 00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,951 Can't believe they're gonna cut that with this punk-ass diamond saw. 236 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:12,836 Jesus. 237 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:26,794 Oh, hey, look. 238 00:12:27,520 --> 00:12:29,273 "Siglature." 239 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:33,035 Next. 240 00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:36,750 - Hello. - Hi. Welcome to the zone zone. 241 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:39,360 Oh, that's funny. 242 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:42,237 I also have a joke for you. 243 00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:43,670 "Lumenade." 244 00:12:45,920 --> 00:12:47,115 Maybe I told it wrong. 245 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:49,156 Well, how can I help you? 246 00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:52,479 If I know someone in violation of the building code, 247 00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:53,630 should I turn them in? 248 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,271 - Interesting question. - Yeah, I know. 249 00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:58,352 Because on the one hand, Confucius says 250 00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,194 we owe a greater responsibility to people we're close with, 251 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:02,873 rather than to society at large. 252 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,520 But on the other hand, Socrates says that we're obligated 253 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:08,035 to obey all laws, even unjust ones. 254 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,396 And then, furthermore, if we're entertaining rules 255 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:13,473 about when it's okay to break the rules, well, actually, where does it end? 256 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:16,155 Well, for me, it ends at five o'clock. 257 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:21,158 Well, I just... I don't know what to do. 258 00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:23,000 All I can tell you is that the building codes 259 00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:24,474 are there for everyone's safety. 260 00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:27,560 Oh, so, you're saying I have no choice but to turn them in. 261 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:29,360 I did not say that. 262 00:13:30,320 --> 00:13:31,320 Well, would you? 263 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:33,480 And remember that I laughed at your "zone zone" joke. 264 00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,239 It's not even a joke! 265 00:13:37,920 --> 00:13:39,195 Oh, is that Linda back there? 266 00:13:39,280 --> 00:13:40,280 - Yeah. - Aw. 267 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,639 How are her hot flashes? Any better? 268 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:43,790 No. 269 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:48,296 Leonard, what are you doing? 270 00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:51,040 Showing you that this is the better way. 271 00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:53,630 Stop. Whatever's inside there is dangerous. 272 00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,036 Whoa. 273 00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:01,438 And pretty. 274 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:05,760 What is that? 275 00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:09,194 Are you okay? 276 00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:12,875 Yeah, I'm fine, I'm just feeling a little... 277 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:19,600 Hungry. 278 00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:23,914 Stop eating Bert! 279 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:29,437 Keep eating Bert! 280 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:34,016 - Leonard? Leonard? - What? What? 281 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,440 You were having a bad dream. 282 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:37,358 Oh, thank God. 283 00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:39,153 I was eating my friends. 284 00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:41,436 Well, one friend and one acquaintance. 285 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:43,159 You know what, Bert's okay. Two friends. 286 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,960 Let me see if you're running a fever. 287 00:14:47,800 --> 00:14:49,519 Oh, yeah. You're burning up. 288 00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:55,677 Jeez! 289 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:58,078 Are you okay? 290 00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:00,120 That depends. What color are my eyes? 291 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:01,600 I don't know. Brown? 292 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:03,194 No, green. No, wait, brown. 293 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,396 Oh, good. I'm awake. 294 00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:11,119 Howie, someone's here to see you. 295 00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:12,800 Hello. 296 00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:14,234 Hey. What's going on? 297 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:16,840 Can you come over here? 298 00:15:18,441 --> 00:15:20,637 Sheldon, the deck is safe. You can walk on it. 299 00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:28,994 Oh, that gets the heart going. Mmm. 300 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:31,520 So, what's up? 301 00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:34,593 I went down to the City Code Compliance Office to turn you in. 302 00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:37,032 - Are you kidding? - But I didn't do it. 303 00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:39,510 I filled out the form and then realized 304 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:42,798 that the unwritten rules of friendship are more important 305 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:44,274 than the written rules 306 00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,875 of the City of Altadena's Zoning and Planning Department. 307 00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:48,076 Aw. 308 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:50,199 Really? "Aw"? 309 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:53,256 And you'll be happy to know that while I was there, 310 00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:54,873 I did look into your neighbor's balcony 311 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:56,713 and it is encroaching on your property line. 312 00:15:57,240 --> 00:16:00,312 I had all this pent-up snitch energy, so I reported him hard. 313 00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:03,616 - What did they say? - He's going to have to remove it. 314 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:05,472 So, the good guys win? 315 00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:07,870 Well, I don't know if I'd call you the good guys. 316 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,360 You're enforcing a law on him 317 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:11,056 that you're willfully ignoring yourselves. 318 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:12,116 All right, fine. 319 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:14,197 So, the morally compromised guys win! 320 00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:16,350 Apparently so. 321 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:17,696 Now, if one of you would be kind enough 322 00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:19,400 to take me home, I need to use my bathroom. 323 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:21,040 What's wrong with the one here? 324 00:16:21,360 --> 00:16:22,430 I'm sorry, I wanna live. 325 00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:29,240 Hey. You guys got a second? 326 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,592 Leonard, I told you, buddy, we don't need to use your laser. 327 00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:34,677 Yeah, all we need is Terry Brad-saw. 328 00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:37,993 That's what I named my saw. 329 00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:43,039 No, I just wanted to apologize for yesterday. I just... 330 00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:45,319 I think I was jealous, you know. 331 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:47,956 Sheldon and Amy might win a Nobel Prize 332 00:16:48,040 --> 00:16:50,236 and now, you guys have this cool meteorite project. 333 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,275 - Really, you're jealous of us? - Yeah. 334 00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:57,397 I even had this crazy dream last night where I ate you both. 335 00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:00,155 Seriously? 336 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,312 - Yeah, I know. - I was pretty out of it. 337 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:04,235 Who'd you eat first? 338 00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:08,833 Oh, uh, you. 339 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:10,670 Nice. 340 00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,793 This is just delightful. 341 00:17:20,360 --> 00:17:21,360 Yeah. 342 00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:25,160 Do you think he knows we're the ones that got him in trouble? 343 00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:26,549 Who cares? 344 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,395 I do. I met his wife, she seems really nice. 345 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:31,917 Sorry about the noise, neighbor! 346 00:17:32,120 --> 00:17:33,120 No problem! 347 00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:36,838 Hey, do you guys know a Sheldon Cooper? 348 00:17:38,800 --> 00:17:40,200 No, we do not! 349 00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:53,034 So, is it just me or has no one been in the store for hours? 350 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:55,029 Yeah, it is weirdly quiet. 351 00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:00,836 Nobody is in the street. 352 00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:02,752 Huh. Well, that's strange. 353 00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:04,776 You thinking what I'm thinking? 354 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:07,235 They cut that meteorite open and unleashed a space plague? 355 00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:08,480 Exactly. 356 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:10,995 Lock up here. 357 00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:12,150 Okay. So, what do we do? 358 00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:14,277 Uh, well, if this is a worst-case scenario 359 00:18:14,360 --> 00:18:15,656 and we're the last two people alive, 360 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:18,320 we're gonna have to rebuild civilization. 361 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:19,754 Do you have any special skills? 362 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:22,229 I can draw. 363 00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:25,160 How about you? 364 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:26,240 I can play clarinet. 365 00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:28,791 - Oh, I didn't know that. - Yeah, ten years. 366 00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:29,920 - Ah. - Yes. 367 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:34,195 You know, it might also be up to us 368 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,272 to repopulate the earth. 369 00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:38,749 I'm okay with that. 370 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:42,190 So, shall we? 371 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:46,600 Wait here, I'm gonna brush my teeth. 372 00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:55,400 Sorry, we're closed. 373 00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:58,999 This is going on Yelp!