1
00:00:04,629 --> 00:00:06,630
[GROANS]

2
00:00:12,387 --> 00:00:14,430
[CONTINUES GROANING]

3
00:00:16,599 --> 00:00:18,308
Problem?

4
00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:20,519
- This is Thai food.
- Here we go.

5
00:00:22,147 --> 00:00:25,065
We don't have Thai food on Thursday.
We have pizza on Thursday.

6
00:00:25,233 --> 00:00:27,943
Yes, but we all agreed
the third Thursday of every month...

7
00:00:28,111 --> 00:00:30,112
...would be
Anything Can Happen Thursday.

8
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:33,449
The news didn't reach
my digestive system which, when startled...

9
00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:36,785
...has its own version
of Anything Can Happen Thursday.

10
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,706
The whole idea behind
Anything Can Happen Thursday...

11
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:42,833
...is to get out of this rut
we've been in.

12
00:00:43,001 --> 00:00:45,627
Rut? I think you mean consistency.

13
00:00:45,795 --> 00:00:48,672
And if we're going to abandon that,
why even call it Thursday?

14
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:53,343
Let's call it "Quonko Day" and divide it
into 29 hours of 17 minutes a piece...

15
00:00:53,511 --> 00:00:57,181
...and celebrate it by sacrificing a goat
to the mighty god Ra.

16
00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:00,976
I could go for some goat.

17
00:01:02,937 --> 00:01:06,315
Sheldon, we agreed we'd do something
different tonight.

18
00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:09,068
All right. Let's go
to the comic book store.

19
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:11,195
We went to the comic book store
last night.

20
00:01:11,362 --> 00:01:13,947
Last night was Wednesday.
Wednesday is comic-book night.

21
00:01:14,115 --> 00:01:19,536
We'll be going on Thursday because
it's Anything Can Happen Thursday.

22
00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:24,208
Way to think outside but pressed right up
against the box, Sheldon.

23
00:01:24,375 --> 00:01:25,834
What are we gonna do tonight?

24
00:01:26,002 --> 00:01:28,170
If I may proffer a suggestion...

25
00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:33,342
...in bars all across this great nation
of ours, Thursday night is Ladies' Night.

26
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:36,428
As the evening progresses,
we will get better-looking...

27
00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:39,515
...courtesy of 99-cent margaritas
and two-for-one Jell-O shots.

28
00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:46,939
Come on, Howard, the odds of us picking
up girls in a bar are practically zero.

29
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:49,399
Oh. Really?
Are you familiar with the Drake equation?

30
00:01:49,567 --> 00:01:52,236
The one that estimates the odds
of contact with extraterrestrials...

31
00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:55,155
...by calculating the product
of series of fractional values...

32
00:01:55,323 --> 00:01:57,741
...such as stars
with planets likely to develop life?

33
00:01:57,909 --> 00:02:02,663
N equals R times FP times NE times FL
times Fl times FC times L?

34
00:02:06,084 --> 00:02:07,626
Yeah, that one.

35
00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:16,385
You can modify it
to calculate our chances of having sex...

36
00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:19,471
...by changing the formula
to use single women in Los Angeles...

37
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:21,515
...those who might find us attractive...

38
00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:25,352
...and what I call
The Wolowitz Coefficient.

39
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:30,149
- The Wolowitz Coefficient?
- Neediness times dress-size squared.

40
00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:35,946
In crunching the numbers, I come up with a
conservative 5812 potential sex partners...

41
00:02:36,114 --> 00:02:37,614
...within a 40-mile radius.

42
00:02:38,074 --> 00:02:39,283
You're joking.

43
00:02:40,368 --> 00:02:43,078
I'm a horny engineer, Leonard.

44
00:02:43,246 --> 00:02:45,706
I never joke about math or sex.

45
00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:50,460
Well, what are we waiting for?
Let's bounce, bitches.

46
00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:55,257
Oh, you're right.
It's Anything Can Happen Thursday.

47
00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:57,217
Let's hit the clubs
and meet hot women.

48
00:02:57,385 --> 00:03:01,430
Here we go. Lock up your daughters.
We're gonna hit it and quit it.

49
00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:10,772
Or we could finish eating
and go to the comic book store.

50
00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:13,317
Also a good plan.

51
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:16,653
But next Anything Can Happen Thursday,
we're going to a bar.

52
00:03:16,821 --> 00:03:19,364
- Oh, absolutely.
- You heard that, Ladies' Night ladies?

53
00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:22,034
We're eventually coming for you.

54
00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:27,497
Fascinating.

55
00:03:53,983 --> 00:03:56,568
- Oh, hey, guys. Where you headed?
- To the comic book store.

56
00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:59,738
You're thinking,
"The comic book store on a Thursday?

57
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:02,991
Why, I've fallen down the rabbit hole
and into a land of madness."

58
00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:08,497
What you have failed to take into account is
that this is Anything Can Happen Thursday.

59
00:04:09,666 --> 00:04:11,166
You got me.

60
00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:14,461
Oh, hey, could you pick me up
a few comics for my nephew's birthday?

61
00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,630
No, I think you mean comic books.

62
00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,674
Comics are feeble attempts at humor...

63
00:04:18,841 --> 00:04:21,635
...featuring talking babies
and anthropomorphized pets...

64
00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:26,056
...found traditionally
in the optimistically named "funny pages."

65
00:04:26,724 --> 00:04:29,184
Leonard, pick me up comics
for my nephew's birthday?

66
00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:32,729
- Sure. What does he like?
- I don't know, just pick out anything.

67
00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:35,357
Just pick out anything?

68
00:04:35,984 --> 00:04:39,403
Maybe we can pick out a new suit for him
without knowing his size...

69
00:04:39,570 --> 00:04:42,197
...or pick out his career
without knowing his aptitude...

70
00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:46,285
...or pick out a new breakfast cereal
without knowing his fiber requirements...

71
00:04:46,869 --> 00:04:50,163
...or his feelings
about little marshmallows.

72
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,250
Spider-Man. Get him Spider-Man.

73
00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:56,378
Amazing Spider-Man, Ultimate Spider-Man,
Spectacular Spider-Man...

74
00:04:56,546 --> 00:05:00,090
...The Marvelous Adventures of Spider-Man,
Spider-Man 2099?

75
00:05:00,758 --> 00:05:02,884
- Leonard?
LEONARD: This can go on all night.

76
00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:05,220
Why don't you just come with us?

77
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:08,390
Ugh. That's what I was trying to avoid.

78
00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:12,185
Oh, I forgot Sensational Spider-Man.

79
00:05:15,523 --> 00:05:18,233
Oh, what a cute little store.

80
00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:24,239
Everybody's staring at me.

81
00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:28,785
LEONARD: Don't worry. They're more
scared of you than you are of them.

82
00:05:29,912 --> 00:05:31,079
Unlikely.

83
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,043
Here. What about this one
for my nephew?

84
00:05:36,210 --> 00:05:38,462
- A superb choice.
- Oh, great.

85
00:05:38,629 --> 00:05:41,757
Yeah, provided he has already read
Infinite Crisis and 52...

86
00:05:41,924 --> 00:05:45,385
...and is familiar with the reestablishment
of the DC Multiverse.

87
00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:48,430
Uh, what's a Multiverse?

88
00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:50,849
Get her out of here.

89
00:05:51,809 --> 00:05:54,311
Come on, I'll help you pick something.

90
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:58,440
That's right. She's with us.

91
00:06:00,109 --> 00:06:03,403
Guys like that are so pathetic.

92
00:06:03,571 --> 00:06:04,946
Tell me about it.

93
00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:08,742
Ooh, look, a new Batman belt buckle.

94
00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:12,454
Oh, hey, Leonard.
I help you find something?

95
00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:15,582
Oh, hey, Stuart. This is Penny.
She's just looking for some comic books.

96
00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:19,836
Oh, really? Wow. Blink twice
if you're here against your will.

97
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,089
I think we're fine, Stuart.

98
00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:25,801
- Okay. Let me know if you need anything.
- Thanks.

99
00:06:26,969 --> 00:06:28,970
Oh, he seems like a nice guy.

100
00:06:29,806 --> 00:06:32,099
You mean for someone
who's into comic books?

101
00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:35,936
No, no, no. I just meant for... Yeah.

102
00:06:36,771 --> 00:06:39,981
Just because people appreciate comic
books doesn't make them weirdoes.

103
00:06:40,149 --> 00:06:43,944
Stuart's a terrific artist. He went
to the Rhode Island School of Design.

104
00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:48,156
Okay, what about the guy in the superhero
T-shirt tucked into his sweatpants?

105
00:06:50,118 --> 00:06:52,119
Oh, yeah, that's Captain Sweatpants.

106
00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:57,916
He doesn't really help the point
I'm trying to make.

107
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:13,056
- Got it, got it, got it.
- Got it, got it, got it.

108
00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:14,766
- Need it.
- Need it.

109
00:07:17,186 --> 00:07:20,021
- Let it go, Sheldon.
- Why should I let it go? I saw it first.

110
00:07:20,189 --> 00:07:23,525
- Yes, but I saw it from the front.
- A far less impressive feat.

111
00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:26,361
Oh, come on, I need this
for my Batman collection.

112
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:29,698
- I need it for my Robin collection.
- Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock?

113
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:31,700
Why would I gamble? It's mine. Let go.

114
00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:33,368
- You let go.
- No, you.

115
00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:36,163
- Problem?
- Yes. He won't let go of my comic book.

116
00:07:36,330 --> 00:07:38,665
- It's my comic book.
- Leonard, we need a ruling.

117
00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:40,333
Uh, cut it in half?

118
00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:44,337
- Excuse me.
- Oh, hello again.

119
00:07:44,505 --> 00:07:47,716
Hi. What would you recommend
as a present for a 13-year-old boy?

120
00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:50,385
A 13-year-old girl.

121
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:51,761
[LAUGHS]

122
00:07:51,929 --> 00:07:56,558
But if you're dead set
on a comic book, try this.

123
00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:59,019
Oh. "Hellblazer. " What's this about?

124
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:02,481
A morally ambiguous confidence man
who smokes, has lung cancer...

125
00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:06,109
...and is tormented
by the spirits of the undead.

126
00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:09,696
Well, if that doesn't make me
the favorite aunt, I don't know what will.

127
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:14,576
Is this me?

128
00:08:15,703 --> 00:08:16,912
Depends. Do you like it?

129
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,457
- Wow, it's really good.
- Yes, that's you.

130
00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:24,961
That's so sweet.
But what if I didn't like it?

131
00:08:25,129 --> 00:08:28,089
It'd still be you, but I'd feel like an idiot.

132
00:08:29,550 --> 00:08:32,928
I don't believe it.
Stuart's putting the moves on Penny.

133
00:08:33,095 --> 00:08:35,889
I have got to learn how to draw.

134
00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:38,266
Hey.

135
00:08:38,434 --> 00:08:42,395
Once again, defeated
by your own prurient interests.

136
00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:45,774
Guys, have you seen Stuart all up
in Penny's business over there?

137
00:08:45,942 --> 00:08:50,028
Nobody's up in anybody's business.
Let's just buy our stuff and go.

138
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:53,365
Okay, you've got my number.
Now give me the picture.

139
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,283
All right. You drive a hard bargain...

140
00:08:55,826 --> 00:09:00,580
- ...but here.
- All right. So, um, just give me a call.

141
00:09:03,334 --> 00:09:07,462
So Leonard, how are you enjoying
Anything Can Happen Thursday?

142
00:09:11,926 --> 00:09:15,303
Look at that. That's a dent.

143
00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:19,808
Thank you,
Howard "Ham-Fisted" Wolowitz.

144
00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:25,855
Did you shut the TV off
in the middle of the Deep Space Nine...

145
00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:30,151
...Star Trek: The Original Series
"Trouble With Tribbles" crossover episode?

146
00:09:31,487 --> 00:09:33,488
Apparently so.

147
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,491
Are you ill?

148
00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:38,118
No.

149
00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:39,828
All right.

150
00:09:39,996 --> 00:09:43,373
Then is it fair to say that you're
experiencing some emotional turmoil...

151
00:09:43,541 --> 00:09:46,167
...over the events involving Penny
earlier this evening?

152
00:09:46,669 --> 00:09:49,004
When did you pick up on that?

153
00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:53,425
A moment ago, you turned off the TV
in the middle of the Deep Space Nine...

154
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:57,470
...Star Trek: The Original Series
"Trouble With Tribbles" crossover episode.

155
00:10:00,349 --> 00:10:02,517
Would you like some advice?

156
00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:04,644
Sure, why not?

157
00:10:04,812 --> 00:10:07,272
Then this is the perfect time
to launch a blog...

158
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:10,066
...with an interactive comments section.

159
00:10:11,527 --> 00:10:12,652
Gee, thanks a lot.

160
00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:15,864
Would you rather I offer
my personal insight?

161
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,907
No, I don't need any insights.

162
00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:21,411
I just wanna know why Penny's
more interested in Stuart than me.

163
00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:23,371
We're practically the same guy.

164
00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:25,373
Oh, I disagree.

165
00:10:25,541 --> 00:10:28,668
You know, Stuart is taller,
artistic, self-employed...

166
00:10:28,836 --> 00:10:33,715
...and, most significantly,
he gets 45 percent off comic books.

167
00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:41,056
You're right. I really should be asking
strangers on the Internet.

168
00:10:42,725 --> 00:10:45,352
My original point.

169
00:10:47,104 --> 00:10:50,231
Chinese food, vintage video games.

170
00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:53,276
After the nightmare
of Anything Can Happen Thursday...

171
00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:56,696
...this is Friday night
the way it was meant to be.

172
00:10:57,406 --> 00:10:59,449
Who's up for Sheldon-Free Saturday?

173
00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:04,120
Oh, hey, guys.

174
00:11:04,288 --> 00:11:06,039
Hey, Penny and Stuart.

175
00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:08,124
Hey, Stuart.

176
00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,919
- Hey, guys.
- So, what are you kids up to?

177
00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:13,713
Stuart has a piece in an art show
that's opening tonight.

178
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:17,092
And you guys are going together. Great.

179
00:11:17,259 --> 00:11:19,427
It is great. Really great.

180
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,471
It's freaking awesome.

181
00:11:22,223 --> 00:11:23,932
- What are you doing?
- Friday night.

182
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:26,393
That means Chinese food
and vintage video games?

183
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:29,479
Vintage doesn't even begin to describe
what we have planned.

184
00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:34,150
Tonight we are playing the classic 1980
interactive text adventure, "Zork."

185
00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:37,570
It's the buggy beta version.

186
00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:39,406
Wow, "Zork."

187
00:11:39,573 --> 00:11:41,658
- Well, you guys have fun.
- Yeah.

188
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:44,119
STUART: See you, guys.
- See you, Stuart.

189
00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:46,079
- Hey, Howard?
- Yes?

190
00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:49,416
Take me to a bar with women.

191
00:11:49,917 --> 00:11:51,292
- Really?
- Yeah.

192
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:53,920
Okay.

193
00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:58,466
Let me just go inside
and slip off my underwear.

194
00:12:01,804 --> 00:12:02,804
Why?

195
00:12:02,972 --> 00:12:07,559
HOWARD: Well, if I get lucky, I don't wanna
be caught in my Aquaman briefs.

196
00:12:09,019 --> 00:12:10,478
Do you...? Let's go.

197
00:12:16,444 --> 00:12:17,777
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]

198
00:12:17,945 --> 00:12:21,573
May I have a grasshopper
with a little umbrella, please?

199
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,908
- No, he may not.
- Why?

200
00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:28,830
I'm not sitting here with a guy drinking
a grasshopper with a little umbrella.

201
00:12:29,540 --> 00:12:30,790
Fine.

202
00:12:30,958 --> 00:12:32,417
I'll have a chocolate martini.

203
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:35,128
Wrong again.

204
00:12:35,546 --> 00:12:40,592
You know I can't talk to women unless
I'm lit up like the Hindu festival of Diwali.

205
00:12:44,638 --> 00:12:48,850
There are plenty of bars where you can
order grasshoppers or chocolate martinis...

206
00:12:49,018 --> 00:12:53,021
...but you wouldn't have to
because there are no women in them.

207
00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:55,523
Gotcha.

208
00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:59,027
I'll have a Brandy Alexander.

209
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:03,198
All right, the Three Musketeers
just became the Dynamic Duo.

210
00:13:03,532 --> 00:13:08,119
- Should we talk to some of these women?
- No, it's way too early in the night for that.

211
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:11,372
See, first we let the lawyers
and the jocks thin the herd...

212
00:13:11,540 --> 00:13:15,043
...and then we go after the weak
and the old and the lame.

213
00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:19,881
- That's your system?
- That's my system.

214
00:13:21,258 --> 00:13:24,177
Oh, and if you spot a chick
with a Seeing Eye dog, she's mine.

215
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:29,224
Oh, come on.

216
00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:33,853
I think it's nice that Captain Sweatpants
showed up to your art opening.

217
00:13:34,563 --> 00:13:37,899
Yeah. It would've been nicer
if he hadn't touched all the cheese.

218
00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:42,529
Um, you know, it's kind of early.

219
00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:44,697
Wanna maybe come in for coffee
or something?

220
00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:48,034
Oh, gee, it's a little late for coffee,
isn't it?

221
00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:52,580
Oh, you think "coffee" means coffee.
That is so sweet.

222
00:13:54,124 --> 00:13:55,750
Come on, I think I have decaf.

223
00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:58,878
Oh, good, Stuart.
I thought I heard your voice.

224
00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:01,548
- Do you have a moment?
- Uh, yeah, I guess.

225
00:14:01,715 --> 00:14:03,174
We're a little busy here, so...

226
00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:06,094
- What are you doing?
- We're having coffee.

227
00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:08,596
Isn't it a little late for coffee?

228
00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,349
It's okay. She thinks she has decaf.

229
00:14:16,105 --> 00:14:18,690
I'll just go look for it.

230
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:21,401
- What's up?
- Well, I've spent the last three hours...

231
00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:24,946
...in a debate in the DC Comics Batman
chat room, and I need your help.

232
00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:28,449
Oh, yeah. Those guys can be
very stubborn. What's the topic?

233
00:14:28,617 --> 00:14:31,786
I am asserting in the event
that Batman's death proves permanent...

234
00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:36,082
...the original Robin, Dick Grayson,
is the logical successor to the Bat Cowl.

235
00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:39,627
Ooh, Sheldon, I'm afraid
you couldn't be more wrong.

236
00:14:44,466 --> 00:14:46,759
"More wrong"?

237
00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:53,057
Wrong is an absolute state
and not subject to gradation.

238
00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:56,561
Of course it is. It's a little wrong
to say a tomato is a vegetable.

239
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:59,814
It's very wrong to say
it's a suspension bridge.

240
00:15:01,191 --> 00:15:04,652
But returning to the original issue,
Dick Grayson became Nightwing.

241
00:15:04,820 --> 00:15:06,237
A superhero in his own right.

242
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:09,115
"Batman Two" has to be the second Robin,
Jason Todd.

243
00:15:09,533 --> 00:15:12,577
"Has to be"? "Has to be"?

244
00:15:12,828 --> 00:15:15,663
I hope you're being
deliberately provocative.

245
00:15:16,540 --> 00:15:18,499
PENNY: I found the decaf.
- Oh, great.

246
00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:21,669
Yeah, herbal tea for me, please.

247
00:15:24,340 --> 00:15:27,967
Barkeep, Alexander me.

248
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,386
How about those two?

249
00:15:30,554 --> 00:15:32,430
No, they're eating peanuts.

250
00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:36,643
With my allergies, one kiss
would put me in Cedars-Sinai for a week.

251
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:41,105
What about the ones in the corner?

252
00:15:41,273 --> 00:15:44,233
Possible. Very possible.

253
00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:47,695
You want the one in the whiplash collar
or the one who keeps blinking?

254
00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,783
- I think Blinky's cute.
- Done, sir.

255
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,910
Wait. So we just go over there?

256
00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:56,704
No. We have a little prep work to do.

257
00:15:56,872 --> 00:15:59,916
Put this in your mouth, we walk past them,
you stumble a bit.

258
00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:02,377
I say, "Sorry,
my friend's had a little too much."

259
00:16:02,544 --> 00:16:05,880
And then I start to pull it
out of your mouth and say:

260
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:08,633
"A little too much fun."

261
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,051
[LAUGHS]

262
00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:13,638
Get it? I mean, they're laughing,
we're laughing. Then we get them up...

263
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:17,475
...to about a 0.15 blood alcohol level
and tell them we're millionaires.

264
00:16:19,561 --> 00:16:21,229
What else you got?

265
00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:25,525
Depends. Are you willing to sit on my lap
and pretend to be a ventriloquist's dummy?

266
00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:26,943
No.

267
00:16:27,111 --> 00:16:30,571
I can't sit on your lap.
You don't know the routine.

268
00:16:32,741 --> 00:16:36,995
I'm sorry, but you're obviously stuck
in a pre-Zero Hour DC Universe.

269
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:40,623
Of course I am. Removing Joe Chill
as the killer of Batman's parents...

270
00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:43,084
...effectively deprived him
of his raison d'être.

271
00:16:44,169 --> 00:16:47,505
You can throw all the French around
you want, it doesn't make you right.

272
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:49,924
Au contraire.

273
00:16:50,676 --> 00:16:53,928
Plus, you're forgetting
that the Infinite Crisis story line...

274
00:16:54,096 --> 00:16:56,347
...restored Joe Chill
to the Batman mythology.

275
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:58,850
I am forgetting nothing,
and I resent your tone.

276
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,518
[SIGHS]

277
00:17:00,894 --> 00:17:04,272
Okay. Look, Sheldon, it's late.
I've gotta get some sleep.

278
00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,733
- So I win.
- No, I'm tired.

279
00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:09,861
So I win.

280
00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:13,406
- Fine, you win.
- Darn tooting, I win.

281
00:17:14,324 --> 00:17:17,452
Penny, I really had a terrific time.

282
00:17:18,078 --> 00:17:19,454
Penny?

283
00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,372
No, no, no. Don't wake her.

284
00:17:21,915 --> 00:17:24,876
She'll maul you like a rabid wolverine.

285
00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:30,339
You know, I don't think that was decaf.

286
00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:37,138
HOWARD:
Wait, is this your card or isn't it?

287
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:42,060
Trust me, this was their card.

288
00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:43,895
I thought you were good at this.

289
00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:47,148
You're always talking about
how you go to bars and meet women.

290
00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:48,816
I do. All the time.

291
00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:51,652
Well, what happened?
Been sitting here all night...

292
00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:55,907
...and the longest conversation you've had
with a woman was when your mom called.

293
00:18:00,996 --> 00:18:03,664
Wow, you're just gonna make me
come out and say it, aren't you?

294
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,249
Say what?

295
00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,752
You're weighing me down.

296
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:13,257
I'm a falcon who hunts better solo.

297
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:18,262
Fine, I'll sit here.
You take flight and hunt.

298
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,974
Don't be ridiculous.
You can't just tell a falcon when to hunt.

299
00:18:22,559 --> 00:18:24,852
Actually, you can.

300
00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:28,773
There's a whole sport built around it.

301
00:18:30,025 --> 00:18:32,068
Falconry.

302
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:36,447
Shut up.

303
00:18:36,865 --> 00:18:39,534
Let's just get Koothrappali and go.

304
00:18:45,207 --> 00:18:47,458
Lucky bastard.

305
00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:51,796
It's gotta be that stupid accent of his.

306
00:18:54,883 --> 00:18:57,802
[IN INDIAN ACCENT]
Hello, I'm Sanjay Wolowitz from Bombay.

307
00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:02,515
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Okay, I'm stumped.

308
00:20:08,498 --> 00:20:10,499
[English - US - SDH]