1 00:00:12,434 --> 00:00:14,231 Clarify something for me. 2 00:00:14,402 --> 00:00:19,601 Isn't the point of a communal meal the exchange of ideas and opinions... 3 00:00:19,774 --> 00:00:22,743 an opportunity to consider important issues of the day? 4 00:00:22,911 --> 00:00:25,937 It is. You just kind of put a damper on things when you said: 5 00:00:26,114 --> 00:00:30,141 "The next person I see talking with food in their mouth will be put to death." 6 00:00:30,919 --> 00:00:33,149 We could argue about who said what all night... 7 00:00:33,321 --> 00:00:35,915 but to set things back on course... 8 00:00:36,091 --> 00:00:38,616 I will propose a new topic of conversation. 9 00:00:38,793 --> 00:00:39,851 - Oh! - Great. 10 00:00:40,028 --> 00:00:42,758 What is the best number? 11 00:00:42,931 --> 00:00:46,423 By the way, there's only one correct answer. 12 00:00:47,802 --> 00:00:50,771 Five million, three hundred, eighteen thousand and eight? 13 00:00:50,939 --> 00:00:55,399 Wrong. The best number is 73. 14 00:00:58,813 --> 00:01:00,013 You're probably wondering why. 15 00:01:00,181 --> 00:01:01,273 - No. - No, we're good. 16 00:01:01,449 --> 00:01:03,610 Seventy three is the 21st prime number. 17 00:01:03,785 --> 00:01:05,810 It's mirror, 37, is the 12th... 18 00:01:05,987 --> 00:01:10,481 and its mirror, 21, is the product of multiplying... Hang on to your hats. 19 00:01:10,659 --> 00:01:12,684 Seven and three. 20 00:01:13,728 --> 00:01:16,925 Heh? Heh? Did I lie? 21 00:01:17,098 --> 00:01:20,761 We get it. 73 is the Chuck Norris of numbers. 22 00:01:21,503 --> 00:01:23,869 Chuck Norris wishes. 23 00:01:24,072 --> 00:01:26,302 In binary, 73 is a palindrome: 24 00:01:26,474 --> 00:01:27,702 One, zero, zero, one... 25 00:01:27,876 --> 00:01:29,036 zero, zero, one. 26 00:01:29,210 --> 00:01:32,441 Which, backwards, is one, zero, zero, one, zero, zero, one. 27 00:01:32,614 --> 00:01:33,774 Exactly the same. 28 00:01:33,948 --> 00:01:38,112 All Chuck Norris backwards gets you is "sirron kcuhc." 29 00:01:38,987 --> 00:01:43,856 Just for the record, when you enter 5,318,008 in a calculator... 30 00:01:44,025 --> 00:01:46,459 upside down, it spells "boobies." 31 00:01:50,398 --> 00:01:53,196 Remember wondering why the girls didn't wanna eat with us? 32 00:01:53,368 --> 00:01:54,995 Yeah, I get it now. 33 00:01:57,172 --> 00:02:01,165 - I love your heart locket, Bernadette. - Oh, thanks. Howard gave it to me. 34 00:02:01,342 --> 00:02:02,366 It's the cutest thing. 35 00:02:02,544 --> 00:02:06,310 Every time I have dinner with his mom, the next day I get jewelry. 36 00:02:07,916 --> 00:02:11,682 Did you know the Valentine's heart is not based on the shape of a heart... 37 00:02:11,853 --> 00:02:15,152 but rather on the shape of the buttocks of a female bending over? 38 00:02:18,193 --> 00:02:22,493 Oh. So I spent seventh grade dotting my I's with little asses? 39 00:02:23,631 --> 00:02:24,825 Cool. 40 00:02:26,334 --> 00:02:29,201 - Hey, Penny, how's it going? - Zack. What are you doing here? 41 00:02:29,370 --> 00:02:31,668 My dad's company prints menus for this place. 42 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:33,603 Dropping off some new ones, laminated. 43 00:02:33,775 --> 00:02:36,005 Easier to clean if people throw up on them. 44 00:02:37,545 --> 00:02:40,343 - Guess how I got the idea. - Yeah, I got it. I got it. 45 00:02:40,815 --> 00:02:43,943 Ahem. Uh, Zack, these are my friends Bernadette and Amy. 46 00:02:44,152 --> 00:02:45,210 - Hi. - Hey. 47 00:02:45,386 --> 00:02:47,581 Hoo. 48 00:02:49,924 --> 00:02:53,257 - Okay, well, it was good to see you. - Yeah, you too. 49 00:02:53,428 --> 00:02:56,727 - He's really cute. How do you know him? - Oh, we went out a couple times. 50 00:02:56,898 --> 00:02:58,695 I'm often flummoxed by current slang. 51 00:02:58,867 --> 00:03:01,461 Does "went out" mean "had intercourse"? 52 00:03:02,036 --> 00:03:03,663 - Yes. - No. No. 53 00:03:04,405 --> 00:03:06,168 But in this case, yes. 54 00:03:06,775 --> 00:03:09,869 - Interesting. And was it not satisfactory? - No, it was great. 55 00:03:10,044 --> 00:03:13,411 He just didn't really challenge me on an intellectual level. 56 00:03:13,581 --> 00:03:17,073 Couldn't you just fool around with him and then listen to NPR? 57 00:03:18,620 --> 00:03:21,487 Wouldn't help. Zack can't even spell NPR. 58 00:03:22,223 --> 00:03:23,554 It's what I do with Howard. 59 00:03:23,725 --> 00:03:25,158 I'm much smarter than he is... 60 00:03:25,326 --> 00:03:27,726 but it's important to protect his manhood. 61 00:03:30,098 --> 00:03:31,622 Hoo. 62 00:03:33,001 --> 00:03:35,731 - What's the matter? - I'm suddenly feeling flushed. 63 00:03:35,904 --> 00:03:40,238 My heart rate is elevated, my palms are clammy, my mouth is dry. 64 00:03:40,408 --> 00:03:43,900 In addition, I keep involuntarily saying "hoo." 65 00:03:45,013 --> 00:03:47,607 Oh, we know what's causing that, don't we? 66 00:03:47,782 --> 00:03:48,840 It's no mystery. 67 00:03:49,017 --> 00:03:53,078 I obviously have the flu, coupled with sudden-onset Tourette's syndrome. 68 00:04:21,783 --> 00:04:23,808 You hear about the accident at the bio lab? 69 00:04:23,985 --> 00:04:25,213 - No. - What happened? 70 00:04:25,386 --> 00:04:29,880 They were injecting rats with radioactive isotopes and one of the techs got bit. 71 00:04:30,058 --> 00:04:32,253 Did he get super powers? 72 00:04:34,329 --> 00:04:37,924 No, he got five stitches and a tetanus shot. 73 00:04:38,099 --> 00:04:39,123 Oh. 74 00:04:39,300 --> 00:04:41,165 Well, that's disappointing. 75 00:04:41,336 --> 00:04:42,496 - Why? - Oh. 76 00:04:42,670 --> 00:04:44,831 You get bit by radioactive animal in a lab... 77 00:04:45,006 --> 00:04:47,065 you kind of wanna turn into a superhero. 78 00:04:47,775 --> 00:04:50,266 Yeah, but who'd wanna become Rat Man? 79 00:04:51,145 --> 00:04:52,578 Who wouldn't? 80 00:04:54,015 --> 00:04:56,381 You could zip through a maze in nothing flat... 81 00:04:56,551 --> 00:05:00,681 squeeze through small holes and shut down restaurants in a single bound. 82 00:05:00,855 --> 00:05:02,846 And the best part is, if I were Rat Man... 83 00:05:03,024 --> 00:05:05,288 you could be my sidekick, Mouse Boy. 84 00:05:10,832 --> 00:05:12,163 Mouse Boy? 85 00:05:12,333 --> 00:05:15,825 You don't like Mouse Boy? How about, uh, Kid Vermin? 86 00:05:16,004 --> 00:05:19,167 First of all, if we had super powers, I wouldn't be the sidekick. 87 00:05:19,340 --> 00:05:23,242 - You'd be the sidekick. - Rat Man is nobody's sidekick. 88 00:05:23,811 --> 00:05:27,212 Leonard, settle this, of the two of us, who's the obvious sidekick? 89 00:05:27,382 --> 00:05:28,406 Yeah, Leonard, who? 90 00:05:31,886 --> 00:05:34,946 Twelve years after high school and I'm still at the nerd table. 91 00:05:39,327 --> 00:05:43,195 Aren't you slicing that man's brain a little too thin? 92 00:05:47,568 --> 00:05:51,129 It's too thin if I were making a foot-long brain sandwich at Quizno's. 93 00:05:52,607 --> 00:05:54,905 For examination under a two photon microscope... 94 00:05:55,076 --> 00:05:57,237 it's fine. 95 00:06:00,415 --> 00:06:01,882 Well, you're the expert. 96 00:06:02,050 --> 00:06:05,884 If the correct way to do it is the wrong way, then I yield. 97 00:06:06,054 --> 00:06:08,784 Very well, if you die and donate your body to science... 98 00:06:08,957 --> 00:06:11,391 I promise to slice your brain like Canadian bacon. 99 00:06:12,727 --> 00:06:14,422 Thank you. 100 00:06:14,595 --> 00:06:17,860 Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to take my temperature. 101 00:06:18,066 --> 00:06:20,159 Are you monitoring your circadian rhythms... 102 00:06:20,368 --> 00:06:23,565 in order to identify your periods of maximum mental acuity? 103 00:06:23,738 --> 00:06:24,830 I did that one summer. 104 00:06:25,006 --> 00:06:27,236 Ah, youth. 105 00:06:28,142 --> 00:06:30,633 No, I experienced distressing symptoms last night... 106 00:06:30,812 --> 00:06:32,973 so I'm checking my vital signs every hour. 107 00:06:33,648 --> 00:06:37,812 I'd be happy to create a chart and participate in a differential diagnosis. 108 00:06:37,986 --> 00:06:39,647 Oh, that sounds like fun. 109 00:06:41,956 --> 00:06:44,322 All right. Ahem. 110 00:06:44,525 --> 00:06:46,083 What were the symptoms? 111 00:06:46,260 --> 00:06:49,855 Elevated heart rate, moist palms, dry mouth... 112 00:06:50,031 --> 00:06:52,898 and localized vascular throbbing. 113 00:06:54,202 --> 00:06:57,103 Localized to what region? 114 00:06:58,539 --> 00:07:01,269 Ears and genitalia. 115 00:07:02,276 --> 00:07:03,300 Interesting. 116 00:07:03,478 --> 00:07:06,038 Not body parts that usually team up. 117 00:07:09,350 --> 00:07:13,184 What about environmental factors? Describe the scene for me. 118 00:07:13,354 --> 00:07:16,050 I was in a restaurant with Penny and Bernadette, drinking water. 119 00:07:16,224 --> 00:07:19,125 Carbonated, as it was a special occasion. 120 00:07:19,293 --> 00:07:23,730 Penny's friend Zack stopped by and said hello and I said "hoo." 121 00:07:24,365 --> 00:07:26,299 - Who? - Zack. 122 00:07:27,001 --> 00:07:30,061 - Then why did you ask? - Ask what? 123 00:07:30,238 --> 00:07:32,433 - "Who?" - Zack. 124 00:07:33,541 --> 00:07:35,509 All right, let's start over. 125 00:07:35,676 --> 00:07:37,769 What did you say when Zack walked in? 126 00:07:37,945 --> 00:07:40,413 - Hoo. - Zack. 127 00:07:40,581 --> 00:07:43,812 - Why do you keep saying Zack? - Because you keep saying, "Who?" 128 00:07:43,985 --> 00:07:46,545 I'm not saying "hoo" now, I said "hoo" last night. 129 00:07:46,721 --> 00:07:48,848 And the answer was Zack, correct? 130 00:07:49,557 --> 00:07:52,321 There was no question, I simply said, "Hoo." 131 00:07:54,595 --> 00:07:56,859 All right. I think I have enough to go on. 132 00:07:58,599 --> 00:08:00,999 Possible explanations for your symptoms are... 133 00:08:01,169 --> 00:08:03,034 in descending order of likelihood... 134 00:08:03,204 --> 00:08:04,501 hyperthyroidism... 135 00:08:04,672 --> 00:08:06,003 premature menopause... 136 00:08:06,174 --> 00:08:08,506 hosting an alien parasite... 137 00:08:08,676 --> 00:08:13,045 or, and I only include it for the sake of covering absolutely all bases... 138 00:08:13,214 --> 00:08:15,478 sexual arousal. 139 00:08:17,685 --> 00:08:20,711 Where would I have picked up an alien parasite? 140 00:08:23,591 --> 00:08:25,354 - There you are. - Oh, hey. 141 00:08:25,526 --> 00:08:28,427 Let me ask you a question. What are you most afraid of? 142 00:08:29,130 --> 00:08:30,222 I don't know. Uh... 143 00:08:30,398 --> 00:08:34,095 Nuclear war, being buried alive. Any of those movies where you get... 144 00:08:34,268 --> 00:08:38,204 that phone call that says you're going to die, and then you do. 145 00:08:38,372 --> 00:08:41,068 No, something very specific that we both know you... 146 00:08:41,242 --> 00:08:44,143 Rajesh Koothrappalli, are terrified of. 147 00:08:44,812 --> 00:08:47,110 Well, type two diabetes runs in my family. 148 00:08:47,281 --> 00:08:51,149 - The thought of losing a toe... - Spiders. You're afraid of spiders. 149 00:08:51,919 --> 00:08:55,082 - What the heck is this? - A jar with a big spider in it, of course. 150 00:08:56,290 --> 00:09:00,420 Bravery test. First one to take his hand out is the sidekick. 151 00:09:00,595 --> 00:09:01,960 Wha...? 152 00:09:02,763 --> 00:09:05,561 - Are you crazy? - Perhaps. 153 00:09:07,268 --> 00:09:09,793 - Are you scared? - No. But it's a stupid test. 154 00:09:09,971 --> 00:09:11,063 Oh, really? 155 00:09:11,239 --> 00:09:14,231 What if the Earth was in danger and the only way to save it... 156 00:09:14,408 --> 00:09:17,502 was to stick your hand in a jar with a spider? 157 00:09:17,678 --> 00:09:21,114 Yeah? What if only way to save it was to shower in the locker room... 158 00:09:21,282 --> 00:09:23,045 and let other guys see you naked? 159 00:09:25,119 --> 00:09:27,587 Oh, come on. That's never gonna happen. 160 00:09:28,656 --> 00:09:32,683 Now, put your hand in the jar or forever be revealed as my sidekick. 161 00:09:33,828 --> 00:09:36,422 All right, I will. 162 00:09:37,598 --> 00:09:39,759 How did you get so brave all of a sudden? 163 00:09:39,934 --> 00:09:42,368 It's easy. The spider's crawling up your arm. 164 00:09:48,509 --> 00:09:50,443 Get it off me, get it off me. 165 00:09:50,611 --> 00:09:52,374 Please, Raj! 166 00:09:54,682 --> 00:09:56,513 Please! 167 00:10:01,155 --> 00:10:03,214 My blood work shows thyroid function normal. 168 00:10:03,391 --> 00:10:04,619 Cortisol levels normal. 169 00:10:05,693 --> 00:10:08,457 How about your follicle-stimulating hormone levels? 170 00:10:08,629 --> 00:10:11,154 Sheldon, I am not going through menopause. 171 00:10:11,832 --> 00:10:16,735 Are you sure? You said that with the testy bark of an old biddy. 172 00:10:17,972 --> 00:10:20,372 I think we need to face the cold, hard truth. 173 00:10:20,541 --> 00:10:23,806 I was sexually aroused by Penny's friend Zack. 174 00:10:23,978 --> 00:10:25,002 Hang on. 175 00:10:25,179 --> 00:10:29,809 I don't know that we've given the alien parasite hypothesis a fair shake. 176 00:10:29,984 --> 00:10:33,010 Let's look at this logically. I have a stomach, I get hungry. 177 00:10:33,187 --> 00:10:35,917 I have genitals, I have the potential for sexual arousal. 178 00:10:37,024 --> 00:10:38,753 A cross we all must bear. 179 00:10:41,195 --> 00:10:44,323 You know, in difficult moments like this... 180 00:10:44,498 --> 00:10:47,262 I often turn to a force greater than myself. 181 00:10:47,435 --> 00:10:49,130 - Religion? - Star Trek. 182 00:10:50,571 --> 00:10:52,698 Did you see The Motion Picture? 183 00:10:52,873 --> 00:10:54,204 - No. - Don't. It's terrible. 184 00:10:54,375 --> 00:10:57,344 However, in it we learn that... 185 00:10:57,511 --> 00:11:00,275 when Spock finds himself drawn off the path of logic... 186 00:11:00,448 --> 00:11:02,939 by feelings bubbling up from his human half... 187 00:11:03,150 --> 00:11:07,018 he suppresses them, using the Vulcan mental discipline of Kolinahr. 188 00:11:07,221 --> 00:11:10,213 You suggesting we live our lives guided by philosophies... 189 00:11:10,391 --> 00:11:14,384 found in cheap science fiction? Cheap science fiction? 190 00:11:19,233 --> 00:11:20,257 What are you doing? 191 00:11:20,434 --> 00:11:26,031 Using Kolinahr to suppress my anger at that last comment. 192 00:11:26,907 --> 00:11:28,966 Is it possible that your concern for me... 193 00:11:29,176 --> 00:11:31,701 is motivated by nothing more than simple jealousy? 194 00:11:33,547 --> 00:11:37,779 I hadn't considered that. Give me a moment. 195 00:11:40,187 --> 00:11:42,280 - All right. I've considered it. - And? 196 00:11:42,456 --> 00:11:43,946 I reject it. 197 00:11:44,625 --> 00:11:46,923 You reject it because you don't feel jealousy... 198 00:11:47,094 --> 00:11:49,961 or because you are suppressing jealousy? 199 00:11:50,931 --> 00:11:52,956 I think I'll eat my lunch at home. 200 00:11:55,403 --> 00:11:59,499 That's not your lunch, Sheldon. Those are the cadaver brain specimens. 201 00:12:00,207 --> 00:12:01,299 Oh. 202 00:12:02,276 --> 00:12:03,937 As they were incorrectly sliced... 203 00:12:04,111 --> 00:12:07,740 you can see how I could mistake them for my sashimi. 204 00:12:15,456 --> 00:12:17,390 - Hello. - Hey. 205 00:12:17,558 --> 00:12:19,822 Isn't tomorrow your usual laundry night? 206 00:12:19,994 --> 00:12:22,986 The supermarket was out of my regular fabric softener. 207 00:12:23,164 --> 00:12:28,466 If this one under or over-softens, I'll need time to make things right. 208 00:12:28,669 --> 00:12:30,227 That's thinking ahead. 209 00:12:30,404 --> 00:12:33,271 The alternative would be to think backwards... 210 00:12:33,474 --> 00:12:34,964 and that's just remembering. 211 00:12:37,078 --> 00:12:40,411 - So how's Amy? - Amy's changed. 212 00:12:40,581 --> 00:12:42,981 I might have to let her go. 213 00:12:43,184 --> 00:12:44,674 Oh, no. Why? 214 00:12:44,852 --> 00:12:49,585 I thought she was a highly evolved creature of pure intellect, like me... 215 00:12:49,757 --> 00:12:53,693 but recent events indicate that she may be a slave to her baser urges. 216 00:12:53,894 --> 00:12:55,555 Like you. 217 00:12:57,398 --> 00:12:59,559 I'm just gonna skip over that insult. 218 00:13:00,501 --> 00:13:02,128 What insult? 219 00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:04,931 Yeah, that's why I'm gonna skip over it. 220 00:13:05,439 --> 00:13:07,134 Are you saying that Amy is... 221 00:13:07,308 --> 00:13:09,299 what's the scientific word...? 222 00:13:09,510 --> 00:13:12,604 Forget science. She's horny. 223 00:13:15,082 --> 00:13:16,879 Oh, okay. Wow! 224 00:13:17,051 --> 00:13:19,952 It's simple biology. There's nothing I can do about it. 225 00:13:24,892 --> 00:13:26,291 Are you sure? 226 00:13:27,828 --> 00:13:29,022 What are you suggesting? 227 00:13:29,797 --> 00:13:32,994 I'm suggesting there might be something you could do... 228 00:13:33,167 --> 00:13:35,829 about Amy's urges. 229 00:13:39,807 --> 00:13:42,605 It's illegal to spay a human being. 230 00:13:45,446 --> 00:13:47,607 Yeah, that's not what I had in mind. 231 00:13:47,782 --> 00:13:49,044 Oh. 232 00:13:49,216 --> 00:13:50,706 Oh! 233 00:13:51,986 --> 00:13:56,355 - You mean something I could do. - Exactly. 234 00:13:56,557 --> 00:13:59,754 Well, I was hoping to avoid this. 235 00:14:00,494 --> 00:14:03,190 But I might as well get it over with. 236 00:14:03,864 --> 00:14:05,422 Thank you, Penny. 237 00:14:05,599 --> 00:14:07,863 I'll let you know what happens. 238 00:14:10,638 --> 00:14:14,074 Oh, Amy, you lucky girl. 239 00:14:16,110 --> 00:14:18,510 Yes, this is Dr. Sheldon Cooper. 240 00:14:18,679 --> 00:14:23,776 Is this the Zack Johnson who used to have coitus with my neighbor Penny? 241 00:14:25,319 --> 00:14:26,377 Sorry to bother you. 242 00:14:33,294 --> 00:14:36,024 Hello. I'm looking for a Zack Johnson... 243 00:14:36,197 --> 00:14:39,530 who used to have coitus with my neighbor Penny. 244 00:14:39,900 --> 00:14:41,993 Coitus. It means intercourse. 245 00:14:42,169 --> 00:14:45,229 And I have a feeling I'm speaking to the right Zack. 246 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:47,831 This is Sheldon Cooper. 247 00:14:48,008 --> 00:14:49,942 Fine, Shelly. 248 00:14:50,110 --> 00:14:52,908 Yes, that does sound like a girl's name. 249 00:14:53,113 --> 00:14:55,377 No, it doesn't bother me. 250 00:14:55,549 --> 00:14:59,417 Yes, Smelly Shelly does bother me. Let me tell you why I'm calling. 251 00:14:59,620 --> 00:15:05,058 I'd like to know if you'd be interested in having sex with Amy Farrah Fowler. 252 00:15:05,226 --> 00:15:07,524 Amy Farrah Fowler. 253 00:15:07,695 --> 00:15:10,220 Yes, that is a girl's name. 254 00:15:10,397 --> 00:15:13,560 Good grief, it's like trying to talk to a dolphin. 255 00:15:15,436 --> 00:15:16,733 Really? 256 00:15:16,904 --> 00:15:21,136 This is gonna decide who's the hero and who's the sidekick? 257 00:15:29,383 --> 00:15:33,911 - You got a better idea? - Every idea is better than this idea. 258 00:15:35,022 --> 00:15:36,046 Ding! 259 00:15:36,223 --> 00:15:38,953 - Wait, what the hell is "ding"? - It's a bell. 260 00:15:39,159 --> 00:15:42,390 - I don't think this wrestling has a bell. - How do you wanna start? 261 00:15:42,563 --> 00:15:44,531 I say, how about one, two, three, go? 262 00:15:44,698 --> 00:15:47,030 One, two, three, go? That's for babies. 263 00:15:47,668 --> 00:15:50,637 Okay. How about "On your mark, get set, go." 264 00:15:50,804 --> 00:15:53,238 That's for a foot race. We'd have to go outside. 265 00:15:53,407 --> 00:15:55,807 No, it's chilly outside. I didn't bring my jacket. 266 00:15:57,678 --> 00:16:01,136 Oh, for crying out loud. What kind of superhero needs a jacket? 267 00:16:01,315 --> 00:16:02,646 What kind of superhero says: 268 00:16:02,816 --> 00:16:05,182 "Dibs on the red tights, dibs on the red tights"? 269 00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:08,151 How about this? Ready? Wrestle. 270 00:16:08,322 --> 00:16:09,380 Are we starting now... 271 00:16:09,557 --> 00:16:11,752 or you're gonna say...? We're starting. 272 00:16:11,926 --> 00:16:14,190 Don't yell at me. 273 00:16:21,302 --> 00:16:24,965 I suppose there are worse ways to spend a Friday night. 274 00:16:26,774 --> 00:16:28,503 None come to mind. 275 00:16:32,947 --> 00:16:34,437 Look at this stamp. 276 00:16:34,615 --> 00:16:39,643 On what authority are they permitted to mutilate patrons as they enter? 277 00:16:40,354 --> 00:16:41,753 I'm sure it will wash off. 278 00:16:41,922 --> 00:16:45,255 Little comfort tonight. I look like a Hell's Angel. 279 00:16:47,227 --> 00:16:48,854 There's Zack. 280 00:16:49,530 --> 00:16:51,589 Are you sure this is what you want to do? 281 00:16:51,765 --> 00:16:56,225 It's not what I want to do, it's what I have to do. 282 00:16:56,770 --> 00:16:59,102 Well, go, Amy Farrah Fowler. 283 00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:01,733 Follow your endocrine system. 284 00:17:02,543 --> 00:17:05,535 - Thank you. You're a good friend. - Please don't drag this out. 285 00:17:10,451 --> 00:17:13,284 This is never going to come off. 286 00:17:13,454 --> 00:17:15,388 Excuse me. 287 00:17:16,523 --> 00:17:19,458 Zack, I am Amy Farrah Fowler. We met the other night. 288 00:17:19,627 --> 00:17:22,152 I have spent my life in pursuit of pure knowledge. 289 00:17:22,329 --> 00:17:25,355 Until I met you, my decisions were founded in logic and reason. 290 00:17:25,532 --> 00:17:28,831 And yet here I stand before you, 130 pounds of raging estrogen... 291 00:17:29,003 --> 00:17:31,369 longing to grab hold of your gluteus maximus... 292 00:17:31,538 --> 00:17:35,474 and make Shakespeare's metaphorical beast with two backs. 293 00:17:37,311 --> 00:17:39,404 My gluteus what? 294 00:17:40,814 --> 00:17:44,545 On the other hand, as I look at the blank, ape-like expression on your face... 295 00:17:44,718 --> 00:17:48,085 I have decided to adopt the Vulcan practice of Kolinahr. 296 00:17:48,689 --> 00:17:50,987 - Goodbye, Zack. - Bye. 297 00:17:51,358 --> 00:17:53,622 Oh, hoo! 298 00:17:57,297 --> 00:17:59,731 That should hold me for a while. 299 00:18:09,443 --> 00:18:14,847 I'm legally obligated to inform you that I took a karate lesson when I was 11. 300 00:18:15,382 --> 00:18:16,906 I'd be a regular ninja by now... 301 00:18:17,084 --> 00:18:19,575 if my mom could have arranged a carpool. 302 00:18:19,753 --> 00:18:22,586 Well, I've been taking a Pilates class at the rec center. 303 00:18:22,756 --> 00:18:24,917 My abs look like sections of a Hershey bar. 304 00:18:26,226 --> 00:18:28,251 Oh, yeah? Won't matter, you're going down. 305 00:18:28,429 --> 00:18:30,056 No, you're going down. 306 00:18:30,230 --> 00:18:32,027 If anybody's gonna go down, it's you. 307 00:18:32,566 --> 00:18:36,593 Fellas, it's been 30 minutes and nobody's touched each other. 308 00:18:39,039 --> 00:18:42,031 I'm glad you decided to reject your animal hindbrain... 309 00:18:42,209 --> 00:18:44,404 and return to the realm of pure intellect. 310 00:18:44,578 --> 00:18:46,569 As am I. 311 00:18:49,216 --> 00:18:52,549 - What are you doing? - An experiment. 312 00:18:54,054 --> 00:18:56,887 Nope, nothing. Never mind. 313 00:19:08,202 --> 00:19:09,635 You realize you can't win. 314 00:19:09,870 --> 00:19:11,770 I prefer to think that I can't lose. 315 00:19:16,009 --> 00:19:22,039 You're wrong. It's only a matter of time before you fall into Rat Man's Rat Trap. 316 00:19:22,216 --> 00:19:26,516 You pathetic fool. If there were a rat catcher, wouldn't it catch Rat Man? 317 00:19:27,087 --> 00:19:29,146 Just because I didn't express myself well... 318 00:19:29,323 --> 00:19:33,020 doesn't mean my underlying point wasn't valid, you bloviating buffoon. 319 00:19:33,594 --> 00:19:35,562 You narcissistic nincompoop. 320 00:19:35,729 --> 00:19:37,321 You crimson coward! 321 00:19:37,531 --> 00:19:40,523 Leonard, wake up. You're missing some excellent superhero quips.