1 00:00:03,479 --> 00:00:06,778 Buonasera, Luigi's Pizza. 2 00:00:06,949 --> 00:00:11,249 Buonasera, it means "good evening" in Italian. 3 00:00:11,421 --> 00:00:13,412 May I say having to explain that to you... 4 00:00:13,589 --> 00:00:17,252 calls into question the authenticity of your ristorante? 5 00:00:17,927 --> 00:00:19,087 Okay, I'm out of here. 6 00:00:21,397 --> 00:00:24,298 Oh, for heaven's sake, now you're being deliberately stupid. 7 00:00:25,601 --> 00:00:28,092 - Where are you going? - I'm having dinner with Priya at Raj's. 8 00:00:28,271 --> 00:00:31,468 - Howard's gonna be there, wanna join us? - But tonight's Thursday. 9 00:00:31,641 --> 00:00:34,576 On Thursdays everybody comes over here and has pizza... 10 00:00:34,744 --> 00:00:38,646 or a reasonable facsimile prepared by someone claiming to be Luigi... 11 00:00:38,815 --> 00:00:41,409 but who sounds suspiciously like Jackie Chan. 12 00:00:42,618 --> 00:00:44,984 Can't we make a one-time exception for tonight? 13 00:00:45,154 --> 00:00:48,681 We could. We could also stop using the letter M. 14 00:00:48,891 --> 00:00:52,383 But I think that idea is isguided and oronic. 15 00:00:53,162 --> 00:00:54,493 Just come with me to Raj's. 16 00:00:54,664 --> 00:00:57,258 - Well, I don't wanna go to a party. - It's not a party. 17 00:00:57,433 --> 00:01:00,129 It's the same group who hang out here, hanging out there. 18 00:01:00,336 --> 00:01:03,703 I'm sorry, but five people eating and chatting is a party. 19 00:01:04,207 --> 00:01:06,402 How come it's not a party when we do it here? 20 00:01:06,609 --> 00:01:08,133 Because we don't throw parties. 21 00:01:09,412 --> 00:01:10,436 I don't know, Sheldon. 22 00:01:10,613 --> 00:01:13,104 I'm going to see Priya, everyone's there. You coming? 23 00:01:13,316 --> 00:01:15,409 Well, no, sir, and do you know why? 24 00:01:15,585 --> 00:01:17,314 Tradition. 25 00:01:18,354 --> 00:01:20,686 Every Thursday night for the last eight years... 26 00:01:20,857 --> 00:01:24,657 you and I and our friends have gathered here in this very spot... 27 00:01:24,827 --> 00:01:27,660 to break bread covered with cheese and sauce... 28 00:01:27,864 --> 00:01:32,858 discuss the issues of the day and, yes, share a laugh or two. 29 00:01:33,035 --> 00:01:35,868 But I guess our rich heritage means nothing to you. 30 00:01:36,839 --> 00:01:40,240 - I guess you're right. See you later. - Wait, Leonard, wait. 31 00:01:40,476 --> 00:01:42,137 What am I going to do for dinner? 32 00:01:42,345 --> 00:01:45,371 - Come with me to Raj's and eat there. - Well, I can't do that. 33 00:01:45,548 --> 00:01:48,642 What if he serves haggis and blood pudding? 34 00:01:49,952 --> 00:01:52,546 I really doubt that's what he'll serve. 35 00:01:52,755 --> 00:01:53,813 But what if he does? 36 00:01:53,990 --> 00:01:57,983 I'll be obliged to dine on liver and lungs stuffed in a sheep's stomach. 37 00:01:58,594 --> 00:02:02,860 Blood pudding is essentially the same. I don't know why he's serving both. 38 00:02:03,900 --> 00:02:06,869 What do you wanna do? Do you wanna come or sit here alone? 39 00:02:07,069 --> 00:02:08,696 No, I'll go to your haggis party. 40 00:02:10,006 --> 00:02:15,000 But I'm telling you, this is adness. This is utter and coplete adness. 41 00:02:40,970 --> 00:02:42,528 - Oh, dear. - What? 42 00:02:42,705 --> 00:02:44,263 Raj's television. 43 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:48,035 I just realized we're about to spend an evening watching a plasma screen... 44 00:02:48,211 --> 00:02:51,408 with a cluster of dead pixels in the upper left-hand corner. 45 00:02:52,014 --> 00:02:54,209 So don't watch TV, read a book. 46 00:02:54,450 --> 00:02:57,851 And be a social pariah? You know that's not my style. 47 00:03:02,925 --> 00:03:05,723 The audible sigh is a show of exasperation, right? 48 00:03:06,295 --> 00:03:07,660 Right. 49 00:03:07,830 --> 00:03:11,163 Was it about me or the dead pixels? 50 00:03:11,701 --> 00:03:13,965 Hey, you're just in time. We made Tex-Mex. 51 00:03:14,170 --> 00:03:17,196 - Oh, sounds great. - Oh, Indians making Tex-Mex. 52 00:03:17,373 --> 00:03:20,035 Might as well have had the Chinese pizza. 53 00:03:21,711 --> 00:03:22,871 - Hey, you. - Hi. 54 00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:27,739 That's gotta be fun for you, huh? 55 00:03:28,651 --> 00:03:32,143 Watching Hofstadter suck the saliva out of your sister's mouth? 56 00:03:33,823 --> 00:03:36,189 Excuse me, before this evening goes any further... 57 00:03:36,359 --> 00:03:39,226 we need to decide where everyone's going to sit. 58 00:03:39,462 --> 00:03:41,225 There's no assigned seats, Sheldon. 59 00:03:41,397 --> 00:03:43,592 Just sit anywhere, make yourself comfortable. 60 00:03:43,766 --> 00:03:47,497 Oh, what fun. We're like hippies at a love-in. 61 00:03:48,971 --> 00:03:52,236 - Just sit here. - Yeah, right on, man, right on. 62 00:03:54,543 --> 00:04:00,504 Oh, look, it's Harry Potter and 98 Percent of the Sorcerer's Stone. 63 00:04:01,384 --> 00:04:04,876 Okay, we've got fajitas with all the fixings... 64 00:04:05,054 --> 00:04:06,419 so you make your own. 65 00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:09,284 Oh, that's wonderful. Dinner, some assembly required. 66 00:04:11,193 --> 00:04:13,855 - Do you want a margarita, Sheldon? - What...? A margarita? 67 00:04:14,030 --> 00:04:16,260 Where are we? What is happening? 68 00:04:19,035 --> 00:04:21,560 Oh, hey, Sheldon. What can I get you? 69 00:04:21,771 --> 00:04:23,534 Water, neat... 70 00:04:23,706 --> 00:04:26,004 with a little umbrella. 71 00:04:26,208 --> 00:04:27,800 Where are all your friends? 72 00:04:28,044 --> 00:04:31,070 Sadly, Penny, this evening, I am The Dark Knight... 73 00:04:31,247 --> 00:04:33,306 roaming these mean streets alone. 74 00:04:33,549 --> 00:04:39,010 A windbreaker for my cape and a stern expression for my cowl. 75 00:04:41,324 --> 00:04:42,723 Okay. 76 00:04:43,826 --> 00:04:46,522 Excuse me. Isn't this the point... 77 00:04:46,696 --> 00:04:50,029 where the world-weary barkeep absent-mindedly wipes down the bar... 78 00:04:50,199 --> 00:04:52,667 and coaxes the woes out of the troubled patron? 79 00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:57,431 Well, I was getting your stupid umbrella, but all right. 80 00:04:59,041 --> 00:05:01,475 What's troubling you, buddy? 81 00:05:03,579 --> 00:05:06,742 I don't think your heart's in it, but since you asked... 82 00:05:06,916 --> 00:05:10,044 Apparently, because Leonard is dating Raj's sister... 83 00:05:10,219 --> 00:05:12,915 we're all forced to hang out at his apartment. 84 00:05:13,089 --> 00:05:15,683 - Oh, the horror. - Yeah. Indeed. 85 00:05:15,858 --> 00:05:18,258 Yeah, at one point, Raj put on reggae music... 86 00:05:18,427 --> 00:05:20,691 and his sister took off her shoes. 87 00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:23,058 It was like the last days of Caligula. 88 00:05:28,004 --> 00:05:30,165 Oh, I have to get this. 89 00:05:30,339 --> 00:05:31,601 Umbrella? 90 00:05:34,543 --> 00:05:37,478 I wonder what she's exasperated about? 91 00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:39,104 Hello? 92 00:05:39,281 --> 00:05:40,612 Sheldon, are you all right? 93 00:05:40,783 --> 00:05:43,308 When last we spoke, you were gonna take a taxi home from Raj's. 94 00:05:43,486 --> 00:05:46,580 But according to Facebook, you just checked in at the Cheesecake Factory. 95 00:05:46,789 --> 00:05:48,120 Yes, I was in a taxi... 96 00:05:48,290 --> 00:05:51,987 but the driver didn't look at all like the photograph on his license. 97 00:05:52,161 --> 00:05:54,595 So I leapt out and ran for it. 98 00:05:55,131 --> 00:05:56,792 Wise. 99 00:05:56,966 --> 00:06:00,959 Here you go, just like recovering alcoholics drink in the Caribbean. 100 00:06:01,504 --> 00:06:02,994 Hi, bestie. 101 00:06:03,172 --> 00:06:05,106 Oh, hi, Amy. How you been? 102 00:06:05,307 --> 00:06:09,539 Fine. From this angle, I can see up your nose. 103 00:06:09,745 --> 00:06:12,305 Yeah, it's a great time to be alive, isn't it? 104 00:06:12,515 --> 00:06:16,246 Don't worry, my problems can wait while you two hens finish your clucking. 105 00:06:17,820 --> 00:06:20,812 Look, Sheldon, Leonard is dating Priya. She's staying with Raj. 106 00:06:20,990 --> 00:06:24,323 That means you're all probably gonna be hanging out there more. 107 00:06:24,493 --> 00:06:26,427 Penny, sorry you got dragged into this. 108 00:06:26,662 --> 00:06:28,823 I know you're devastated that your ex-boyfriend... 109 00:06:28,998 --> 00:06:33,059 has found an exciting new lover with flawless caramel-colored skin. 110 00:06:33,235 --> 00:06:35,499 Okay, I'm not upset about Leonard and Priya. 111 00:06:35,704 --> 00:06:38,002 Your flaring nostrils indicate otherwise. 112 00:06:39,508 --> 00:06:41,499 Cluck, cluck, cluck. 113 00:06:42,511 --> 00:06:44,274 Sheldon, look at me. 114 00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:48,178 I think it's time to face the fact that Leonard is the nucleus of your group. 115 00:06:48,350 --> 00:06:49,908 Where he goes, the group goes. 116 00:06:50,152 --> 00:06:52,916 Leonard, the nucleus? That makes no sense. 117 00:06:53,089 --> 00:06:56,581 I'm the whimsical elf that everyone looks to for a good time. 118 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:02,659 I'm not saying that you're not fun. You're the most fun person I know. 119 00:07:04,266 --> 00:07:06,894 A lot of people think I'm fun to be around. 120 00:07:07,069 --> 00:07:09,230 Don't be needy, bestie. 121 00:07:09,438 --> 00:07:12,100 That's probably part of what chased Leonard away. 122 00:07:13,242 --> 00:07:16,609 What I am saying, Sheldon, is that your group is Leonard-centric. 123 00:07:17,179 --> 00:07:19,477 If it were a town, it would be Leonardville. 124 00:07:19,682 --> 00:07:22,378 If it were an Islamic nation, Leonardstan. 125 00:07:22,551 --> 00:07:24,781 If it were the birthplace of motion pictures... 126 00:07:24,954 --> 00:07:27,582 we'd all be singing "Hooray for Leonardwood." 127 00:07:27,756 --> 00:07:29,781 Oh, I got a one. If you guys were a band... 128 00:07:29,959 --> 00:07:31,679 you'd be called Leonard and the Leonards. 129 00:07:34,697 --> 00:07:36,096 So needy. 130 00:07:40,002 --> 00:07:43,233 - What you doing? - I'm setting out snacks. 131 00:07:43,405 --> 00:07:46,738 You do realize everyone's eating at Raj's again tonight. 132 00:07:46,909 --> 00:07:50,504 I didn't say the snacks were for you, now, did I, Nosy Rosie? 133 00:07:54,984 --> 00:07:57,748 - You're having people over? - Yes. 134 00:07:57,920 --> 00:08:01,083 Must be killing you, wondering who. Fine, I'll tell you. 135 00:08:01,257 --> 00:08:05,159 It's Stuart from the comic book store, Barry Kripke from the university... 136 00:08:05,327 --> 00:08:10,162 Penny's ex-boyfriend, Zack, and TV's LeVar Burton. 137 00:08:11,333 --> 00:08:13,665 Really? LeVar Burton's coming here? 138 00:08:13,869 --> 00:08:16,030 Possibly, I tweeted him. 139 00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:20,234 Okay, well, tell him I loved him on Star Trek. 140 00:08:20,442 --> 00:08:23,605 Please, Leonard, stop trying to horn in on my new friends. 141 00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:26,147 Of course, good night. 142 00:08:26,348 --> 00:08:28,282 - Leonard. - Yeah? 143 00:08:29,485 --> 00:08:32,113 We had a good run, you and I. 144 00:08:34,190 --> 00:08:36,488 Okay. 145 00:08:36,692 --> 00:08:38,523 But change is a part of life. 146 00:08:39,195 --> 00:08:40,457 It certainly is. 147 00:08:41,497 --> 00:08:43,021 Okay. 148 00:08:43,566 --> 00:08:44,624 I have guests coming. 149 00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:47,826 I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave now. 150 00:08:50,706 --> 00:08:53,800 - I am leaving. - Don't make this harder than it is. 151 00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,344 - Goodbye, Sheldon. - And goodbye to you, sir. 152 00:09:05,054 --> 00:09:06,078 He'll be back. 153 00:09:06,255 --> 00:09:08,815 Of course I'll be back, I live here! 154 00:09:23,739 --> 00:09:26,867 Well, it would appear LeVar Burton won't be joining us. 155 00:09:27,042 --> 00:09:29,476 So, um, let's get started. 156 00:09:29,645 --> 00:09:33,342 Uh, I thought we'd begin by going around the room, introducing ourselves... 157 00:09:33,549 --> 00:09:35,847 and saying a little bit about why we're here. 158 00:09:36,018 --> 00:09:37,781 Okay, ahem, uh, I'm Sheldon. 159 00:09:37,953 --> 00:09:41,286 Uh, for readers of the New England Journal of High Energy Physics... 160 00:09:41,490 --> 00:09:43,549 I need no introduction. 161 00:09:43,726 --> 00:09:47,856 If you're not familiar with that, there's a free copy in your goody bag. 162 00:09:51,133 --> 00:09:52,862 Stuart? 163 00:09:53,402 --> 00:09:56,064 Um, ahem, hi, I'm Stuart. 164 00:09:56,238 --> 00:09:57,933 I run a comic book store... 165 00:09:58,107 --> 00:10:01,770 which, for financial reasons, I'm currently living in. 166 00:10:02,244 --> 00:10:07,307 And I guess what I'm hoping for most out of tonight is a hot shower. 167 00:10:08,317 --> 00:10:10,877 That's very nice, Stuart. Zack? 168 00:10:11,287 --> 00:10:13,551 I'm Zack and I'm, uh... 169 00:10:14,456 --> 00:10:16,651 Uh... 170 00:10:17,826 --> 00:10:19,589 Could you come back to me? 171 00:10:20,262 --> 00:10:23,163 Of course. Barry? 172 00:10:23,399 --> 00:10:26,800 I'm Barry Kripke and I'm here because you told me there was a raffle. 173 00:10:29,071 --> 00:10:30,595 When is the raffle? 174 00:10:30,806 --> 00:10:32,899 Patience, patience, Barry, the waffle... Ahem. 175 00:10:33,075 --> 00:10:35,168 The raffle... 176 00:10:35,344 --> 00:10:40,247 is the grand finale to an evening-long festival of fun and folly. 177 00:10:40,449 --> 00:10:43,543 - One more question... - Yes, you must be present to win. 178 00:10:44,553 --> 00:10:47,613 Okay, I'm ready. I'm Zack and I'm, uh... 179 00:10:48,457 --> 00:10:50,322 Oh, crap, why is this so hard? 180 00:10:55,297 --> 00:10:56,321 - Oh, hey. - Hi. 181 00:10:56,498 --> 00:10:59,490 - Yo, P-Dawg. - Ha, ha. What's up? 182 00:10:59,702 --> 00:11:02,136 We're here to kidnap you for a girls' night out. 183 00:11:02,304 --> 00:11:06,104 Parenthetical, the term "kidnap" is being used playfully. 184 00:11:06,608 --> 00:11:07,836 I kind of figured that. 185 00:11:08,010 --> 00:11:11,002 Good, now put this pillowcase over your head. 186 00:11:12,514 --> 00:11:13,947 No. 187 00:11:14,116 --> 00:11:17,449 She used to be much more fun until Leonard punched her in the heart. 188 00:11:19,455 --> 00:11:22,982 We thought you might wanna go out, have a good time, maybe go dancing. 189 00:11:23,192 --> 00:11:25,660 Oh, gee, thanks, but I'm not really in the mood. 190 00:11:25,861 --> 00:11:27,692 You do understand it will distract you... 191 00:11:27,863 --> 00:11:30,354 from obsessing over the rich variety of sweet loving... 192 00:11:30,532 --> 00:11:33,990 your ex-boyfriend is receiving from the fiery jewel of Mumbai. 193 00:11:35,604 --> 00:11:37,902 Okay, look, if I agree to go out with you guys... 194 00:11:38,107 --> 00:11:40,667 will you stop pestering me about Leonard and Priya? 195 00:11:40,876 --> 00:11:42,241 - Yes. - Sure. 196 00:11:42,478 --> 00:11:44,969 All right, I'll go change. Come on in. 197 00:11:45,147 --> 00:11:48,913 If you'd have let me bring chloroform, we wouldn't have had all this jibber jabber. 198 00:11:52,388 --> 00:11:56,051 Anyway, after snowboarding, I go to the lodge and get in the Jacuzzi. 199 00:11:56,225 --> 00:11:59,388 There's no one around, so naturally I'm free-balling it. 200 00:12:00,863 --> 00:12:03,195 Next thing I know, this beautiful chick shows up. 201 00:12:03,365 --> 00:12:05,697 Drunk out of her skull, wants to get in with me. 202 00:12:05,901 --> 00:12:10,270 Question. Was it a Jacuzzi or a hot tub? 203 00:12:10,506 --> 00:12:14,408 - Really, that's your question? - What's the difference? 204 00:12:14,643 --> 00:12:18,579 Jacuzzi is a commercial brand, hot tub is the generic term... 205 00:12:18,781 --> 00:12:23,411 I. E., all Jacuzzis are hot tubs but not all hot tubs are Jacuzzis. 206 00:12:24,153 --> 00:12:28,419 Is that like all thumbs are fingers but not all fingers are thumbs? 207 00:12:29,258 --> 00:12:31,385 Surprisingly, yes. 208 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,155 Nice. 209 00:12:34,329 --> 00:12:36,559 Now, what exactly are toes? 210 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:40,693 Can you please get back to the drunk girl? 211 00:12:40,869 --> 00:12:43,360 I'd like something to think about in the shower. 212 00:12:43,972 --> 00:12:45,462 Oh, yeah, right. 213 00:12:45,674 --> 00:12:48,040 She takes off all of her clothes, climbs in the hot tub. 214 00:12:48,210 --> 00:12:51,441 - And the first thing I notice... - The water level rose. 215 00:12:53,315 --> 00:12:54,907 - No. - Well, of course it did. 216 00:12:55,083 --> 00:12:57,984 It's said that Archimedes, the ancient Greek mathematician... 217 00:12:58,187 --> 00:13:01,816 discovered the principle of displacement while taking a bath. 218 00:13:03,058 --> 00:13:06,255 Terrific. Go ahead, Zack. Naked drunk girl, free-balling, continue. 219 00:13:06,428 --> 00:13:07,895 Wait, forgive me... 220 00:13:08,063 --> 00:13:10,497 but I think you'll find my story is more interesting. 221 00:13:10,732 --> 00:13:13,064 Does yours have wet breasts in it? 222 00:13:14,336 --> 00:13:16,429 Better, it has a gold crown. 223 00:13:16,638 --> 00:13:19,334 You see, the king wondered how much gold was in it... 224 00:13:19,508 --> 00:13:22,705 and charged Archimedes with coming up with the solution. 225 00:13:22,878 --> 00:13:26,473 The crown was irregularly shaped, there was no way to determine its volume. 226 00:13:26,715 --> 00:13:29,309 But while bathing, Archimedes realized... 227 00:13:29,485 --> 00:13:34,445 he could immerse the crown and measure the amount the water rose. 228 00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:39,494 So long story short, I nailed her. 229 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,795 When he finished, he shouted, "Eureka." 230 00:13:47,002 --> 00:13:48,663 No, I always shout, "Holy moly." 231 00:13:50,172 --> 00:13:52,868 Don't know why, just do. 232 00:13:55,110 --> 00:13:58,637 All right, that concludes the getting- to-know-you portion of the evening. 233 00:13:58,847 --> 00:14:01,372 Now who's ready to play some vintage video games? 234 00:14:01,550 --> 00:14:03,313 Tonight's selections include... 235 00:14:03,519 --> 00:14:06,852 ColecoVision's Rescue in Gargamel's Castle"... 236 00:14:07,022 --> 00:14:08,956 Atari's "Cookie Monster Munch"... 237 00:14:09,124 --> 00:14:14,187 and for you text-adventure aficionados, "Zork." 238 00:14:14,363 --> 00:14:17,161 Pick me, pick me, I'm fun. 239 00:14:20,569 --> 00:14:23,060 That all sucks the big hairy meatball. 240 00:14:23,639 --> 00:14:25,937 How about I get the karaoke machine out of my car... 241 00:14:26,108 --> 00:14:28,576 get plastered and blow the roof off this place? 242 00:14:28,810 --> 00:14:31,370 - Great, I'll make a beer run. - And I'll take a shower. 243 00:14:31,547 --> 00:14:34,539 - We'll meet back here in 15. - Check. 244 00:14:38,554 --> 00:14:40,715 I'm unhappy. 245 00:14:42,391 --> 00:14:45,417 This is delicious. Where did you learn to make chili? 246 00:14:45,594 --> 00:14:48,825 When I was at university in England, my flatmate was from Texas. 247 00:14:49,031 --> 00:14:51,226 I hope she wasn't anything like my flatmate from Texas. 248 00:14:53,235 --> 00:14:54,896 Sheldon is a bit quirky, isn't he? 249 00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:59,938 Oh, please, that crazy bastard is looking at quirky in the rearview mirror. 250 00:15:02,744 --> 00:15:04,585 Did you know that per our roommate agreement... 251 00:15:04,746 --> 00:15:06,839 I have to wash my feet before I get in the shower? 252 00:15:07,049 --> 00:15:10,246 And not in the sink, we each have special buckets. 253 00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:14,748 Raj, did you tell your sister about the time Sheldon got punched by Bill Gates? 254 00:15:14,923 --> 00:15:16,948 - Oh, God, you're kidding. - Ha, ha. Nope. 255 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:20,561 Gates gave a speech at the university, Sheldon went up to him and said: 256 00:15:20,729 --> 00:15:23,425 "Maybe if you weren't so distracted by sick children in Africa... 257 00:15:23,599 --> 00:15:26,119 you could have put a little more thought into Windows Vista." 258 00:15:29,137 --> 00:15:31,105 Bam, right in the nose. 259 00:15:31,907 --> 00:15:34,535 Made me proud to own a PC. 260 00:15:34,743 --> 00:15:36,404 I'd like to propose a toast. 261 00:15:36,578 --> 00:15:39,274 To a rare and wonderful Sheldon-free evening. 262 00:15:39,481 --> 00:15:41,415 - Hear, hear. - Cheers. 263 00:15:42,851 --> 00:15:44,785 That's the first time we've ever done that... 264 00:15:44,953 --> 00:15:48,150 without having Sheldon tell us why it's called a toast. 265 00:15:48,390 --> 00:15:50,255 And why is it called a toast? 266 00:15:50,425 --> 00:15:53,485 Oh, the ancient Romans put spiced toast in their punch bowls. 267 00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:58,359 Sheldon tells it better. 268 00:15:59,735 --> 00:16:01,600 - He kind of does. - Yeah. 269 00:16:03,739 --> 00:16:06,264 Oh, hell, I miss him. 270 00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:13,170 - Where do you guys wanna go dancing? - We were hoping you'd know a place. 271 00:16:13,415 --> 00:16:15,280 Yes, perhaps somewhere packed tightly... 272 00:16:15,450 --> 00:16:18,112 with young beautiful bodies, sweating and writhing... 273 00:16:18,286 --> 00:16:21,312 against each other in a glorious orgy of the flesh. 274 00:16:21,523 --> 00:16:23,821 Oh, yeah, I know that place. 275 00:16:25,027 --> 00:16:26,119 What do you think? 276 00:16:26,328 --> 00:16:30,788 That should display enough bosom to attract a new mate or a hungry infant. 277 00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:33,891 Okay, let's go through this one more time. 278 00:16:34,069 --> 00:16:35,934 Just because Leonard has a new girlfriend... 279 00:16:36,104 --> 00:16:38,402 doesn't mean I need to hook up with some guy. 280 00:16:38,607 --> 00:16:41,667 - But you could if you wanted to, right? - Well, yeah, I guess. 281 00:16:41,910 --> 00:16:43,707 Pick out the hottest guy in the room... 282 00:16:43,912 --> 00:16:46,142 take him home, do unspeakable things to him. 283 00:16:46,314 --> 00:16:47,440 Kick him to the curb... 284 00:16:47,616 --> 00:16:50,983 with a smile on his face and teeth marks on his heinie? 285 00:16:52,721 --> 00:16:53,813 More or less. 286 00:16:55,290 --> 00:16:57,622 What's that like? 287 00:16:57,793 --> 00:16:59,954 I don't know, it's fun while you're doing it. 288 00:17:00,128 --> 00:17:04,622 And then after it's mostly embarrassment, self-loathing and regret. 289 00:17:04,833 --> 00:17:09,202 I would take that deal all day long. 290 00:17:09,371 --> 00:17:11,362 Yeah, well, it's not gonna happen tonight. 291 00:17:11,540 --> 00:17:13,440 You know, for the first time in life... 292 00:17:13,608 --> 00:17:15,974 I'm not in a relationship and I'm totally okay with it. 293 00:17:16,144 --> 00:17:19,477 You know, if being on your own is new to you, I'd be happy to share... 294 00:17:19,648 --> 00:17:24,210 some tension-relieving techniques for ladies I've perfected over the years. 295 00:17:25,153 --> 00:17:28,645 For example, do you have an electric toothbrush? 296 00:17:30,225 --> 00:17:33,092 - Uh, no. - You should get one. 297 00:17:34,896 --> 00:17:36,386 What's that? 298 00:17:36,565 --> 00:17:40,023 It appears to be something preserved between two pieces of acrylic. 299 00:17:40,235 --> 00:17:43,762 Oh, it's a snowflake from the north pole. Leonard gave it to me last year. 300 00:17:43,972 --> 00:17:46,202 Oh, God, that is so romantic. 301 00:17:46,408 --> 00:17:48,273 Yeah, it was. 302 00:17:48,844 --> 00:17:50,835 Leonard's really one of a kind. 303 00:17:51,046 --> 00:17:54,709 Saying that while holding a snowflake is a little heavy-handed, don't you think? 304 00:17:55,383 --> 00:17:56,975 Let me see that. 305 00:18:00,288 --> 00:18:02,381 Oh, screw it. I can deal with a little self-loathing. 306 00:18:02,557 --> 00:18:05,048 Let's go find me a heinie to bite. 307 00:18:05,927 --> 00:18:07,622 Outstanding. And if we fail... 308 00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:12,199 we always can stop at CVS and pick you out a nice toothbrush. 309 00:18:12,701 --> 00:18:15,363 I call mine Gerard. 310 00:18:17,506 --> 00:18:19,701 That's kind of creepy. 311 00:18:21,943 --> 00:18:24,571 Don't go breaking my heart 312 00:18:25,347 --> 00:18:26,974 I couldn't if I tried. 313 00:18:29,184 --> 00:18:32,449 Oh, honey, if I get restless. 314 00:18:32,621 --> 00:18:35,112 Baby, you're not that kind. 315 00:18:38,260 --> 00:18:40,854 Don't go breaking my heart. 316 00:18:41,797 --> 00:18:44,925 Anybody do "Walking on Sunshine" yet? 317 00:18:46,234 --> 00:18:48,532 - No. - Dibs. 318 00:18:51,973 --> 00:18:56,103 I'm sorry, Sheldon bought a loom and learned how to weave? 319 00:18:56,311 --> 00:19:00,042 He actually got pretty good. He made us all matching serapes. 320 00:19:00,248 --> 00:19:03,115 I still wear mine when there's a nip in the air. 321 00:19:04,085 --> 00:19:07,282 Now, was this before or after he adopted the 25 cats? 322 00:19:07,489 --> 00:19:10,151 Long before the cats. I think it was around the time... 323 00:19:10,325 --> 00:19:14,091 he tried to declare our apartment a sovereign nation. 324 00:19:14,262 --> 00:19:16,662 I still have some of the currency. 325 00:19:18,033 --> 00:19:20,126 All my friends. All my friends. 326 00:19:21,069 --> 00:19:23,264 All my friends. 327 00:19:24,973 --> 00:19:28,807 I think it's like Beetlejuice. We said his name too many times. 328 00:19:31,213 --> 00:19:33,181 - Come on in. - Thank you. 329 00:19:33,381 --> 00:19:35,508 Hey, I thought you were with your new buddies. 330 00:19:35,717 --> 00:19:39,312 I had to leave. They were having fun wrong. 331 00:19:40,455 --> 00:19:42,787 - Come here, Sheldon, sit with me. - Thank you. 332 00:19:42,958 --> 00:19:46,450 Would you like some homemade chili? 333 00:19:46,628 --> 00:19:47,822 Are there beans in it? 334 00:19:48,663 --> 00:19:50,631 - Yes. - Oh, then it's not chili. 335 00:19:50,799 --> 00:19:52,824 Real chili has no beans in it. 336 00:19:53,001 --> 00:19:57,370 But you're from a foreign land, so your ignorance is forgiven. 337 00:19:58,740 --> 00:20:02,836 - Sheldon, do you want some or not? - Yes, please. 338 00:20:03,511 --> 00:20:06,344 Your girlfriend's a little short-tempered. 339 00:20:06,514 --> 00:20:09,381 I'd like to propose a toast. 340 00:20:09,618 --> 00:20:11,711 To friends, no matter how quirky. 341 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:13,911 Cheers. 342 00:20:14,656 --> 00:20:18,387 Priya, do you know why this is called a toast? 343 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:19,822 Actually, I do. 344 00:20:19,995 --> 00:20:24,056 I believe the Romans used to put spiced toast in their punch bowls. 345 00:20:24,866 --> 00:20:27,198 She's also a bit of a know-it-all. 346 00:20:29,271 --> 00:20:30,295 Mm. 347 00:20:30,472 --> 00:20:33,202 This is good. Whatever it is. 348 00:20:40,815 --> 00:20:43,283 I'm walking on sunshine. 349 00:20:43,451 --> 00:20:44,713 Whoa. 350 00:20:44,886 --> 00:20:47,252 - I'm walking on sunshine. - Whoa. 351 00:20:48,623 --> 00:20:50,750 Hello, I... 352 00:20:53,662 --> 00:20:55,823 Oh, I don't think so. 353 00:20:57,632 --> 00:21:00,328 I am so done with Twitter.