1 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:05,245 - They are not. - They are too. 2 00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:08,205 Your hypothesis is completely disconfirmed by all the data. 3 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:11,205 You're just clinging to it out of intellectual stubbornness. 4 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:15,445 No, you're displaying a shocking ignorance of the subject matter. 5 00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,729 Mummies and zombies are the exact same thing. 6 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:21,447 Oh, yeah? 7 00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:23,364 Mummies are wrapped in bandages. 8 00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:26,040 That's called a fashion choice. 9 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:30,131 All right. You brought this on yourself. 10 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:33,164 - Sheldon, get him. - If a zombie bites you... 11 00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:35,251 ...you turn into a zombie. 12 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:37,090 However, if a mummy bites you... 13 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,886 ...all you turn into is some schmo with a mummy bite. 14 00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:43,562 So, like a zombie that's been eaten from the waist down... 15 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,570 ...you, sir, have no leg to stand on. 16 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:49,486 - Good boy. Here's a cookie. - Oh, thank you. 17 00:00:49,640 --> 00:00:51,847 Hey, fellas, what's going on? 18 00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:53,644 Mummies and zombies again. 19 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,571 Ahh. They're not the same thing. 20 00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:58,286 You get a cookie too. 21 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:00,481 Thanks. 22 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:03,610 Guess who picked up his new car this morning. 23 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:06,644 Congratulations. Does it have that new-car smell? 24 00:01:06,920 --> 00:01:09,400 Yep. For as long as I can keep my mother out of it. 25 00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:14,170 If you wanna check it out later, it's parked right out front, Space 294. 26 00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:17,682 - I'm sorry, 294? - Yeah. 27 00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:19,888 That's my parking spot. 28 00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:24,648 Why do you have a parking spot? You don't have a car. You don't drive. 29 00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:27,320 It doesn't matter. That's my spot. 30 00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:30,887 Maybe they reassigned it because you never use it. 31 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,641 I'm not using my nipples either. Maybe they should reassign those. 32 00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:39,161 Sheldon, someday, if you get a car... 33 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,681 ...I'm sure they'll give you another parking space. 34 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,929 I don't want another parking space. I want my parking space. 35 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:49,210 Well, it's perfect. It's a corner spot, cutting the risk of door dings in half. 36 00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:51,602 It's a mere 28 steps from the building entrance. 37 00:01:51,840 --> 00:01:55,162 The nearby tree provides shade on hot days... 38 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,045 ...and is also home to a delightful squirrel... 39 00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:02,285 ...which is fortuitous because most squirrels are real jerks. 40 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:08,123 Fun story. Meanwhile, you still don't have a car. 41 00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:09,845 Don't try to change the subject. 42 00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:13,362 This is about a parking space. It has nothing to do with cars. 43 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:15,565 Are you listening to yourself? 44 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,804 I always listen to myself. It's one of the great joys of my life. 45 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:22,801 - Now get your car out of my spot. - Nope. 46 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,083 Very well, you leave me no choice. 47 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:28,322 (GRUNTING) 48 00:02:30,920 --> 00:02:32,251 (SQUIRREL CHITTERING) 49 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:34,721 What are you looking at, you stupid squirrel? 50 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:06,084 President Seibert, listen to reason. 51 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:09,250 Yeah, I understand I don't use the parking spot. 52 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:11,681 That's not the point. I... 53 00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:15,606 Yes, I'm aware you told me not to call you at home. 54 00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:17,565 But you didn't answer the door. 55 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:22,562 And I know you were there because I saw you through the mail slot. 56 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,647 Yeah, well, that's some salty language. 57 00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:28,804 May I remind you, you're the president of a major university... 58 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,571 ...not the president of the Potty Mouth Club. 59 00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:33,000 There it is again. 60 00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:35,771 Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? 61 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,407 Oh. Well, I'm sorry for your loss. 62 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:40,644 Good night, sir. 63 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:42,484 Unbelievable. 64 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:45,008 He says Wolowitz deserves my spot... 65 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:47,720 ...because he's a high-profile asset to the university. 66 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,606 Well, he's not wrong. Howard did go to the International Space Station. 67 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:53,086 That was five weeks ago. 68 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:55,442 How much longer is he gonna milk that cow? 69 00:03:56,720 --> 00:03:59,007 Sheldon, let it go. It's not a big deal. 70 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:01,162 No. No, this is a slippery slope, Leonard. 71 00:04:01,320 --> 00:04:04,005 See, it starts with a parking space. Where does it end? 72 00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:07,687 It's like my dad always said, "First they say you can't drink and drive. 73 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,400 Next you can't let your 10-year-old take the wheel... 74 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,246 ...while you sleep one off in the backseat." 75 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:17,848 All that story does is make me feel bad for your mother. 76 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:23,970 Leonard, you're my best friend. Why don't you ever take my side? 77 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:28,683 Because I can never understand your side! 78 00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:33,005 Give it back. 79 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,771 I'm sorry, but could you be more specific? 80 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:39,163 My Iron Man helmet. Koothrappali saw you take it. Give it back. 81 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,203 Oh, that. 82 00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:46,048 Well, see, I wanted it and you weren't using it. 83 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,290 Apparently, those are the rules we live by now. 84 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:55,566 Payback, it truly is the B-word, isn't it? 85 00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,482 Sheldon, that is a $500 limited-edition collectible... 86 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:01,966 ...and I want it back. 87 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:05,084 Well, I'd love to help you out, but unfortunately... 88 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:07,641 ...I'm using it. 89 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:15,483 Fine. I'm taking your diploma. 90 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:19,689 SHELDON: Go ahead. That's the only doctorate you'll ever get. 91 00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:27,167 It smells funny in here. 92 00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:30,921 We're so proud of you, Amy. Your first bikini wax. 93 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:32,889 Yeah. 94 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:40,681 So how you doing? 95 00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:42,928 Oh, a little sensitive, but not bad. 96 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,284 Does it always take that long? 97 00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:48,762 Uh, no, they don't usually have to go out and get more wax. 98 00:05:50,280 --> 00:05:53,204 I feel like I'm 5 pounds lighter. 99 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:57,046 Really? Only 5? 100 00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:00,600 Anybody want a drink? 101 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,285 AMY: Sure. BERNADETTE: Okay. 102 00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:06,161 So did you spend last night hearing about this silly parking-space fight too? 103 00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:09,091 For hours. Fortunately, I couldn't understand most of it... 104 00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:11,965 ...because Sheldon was wearing that stupid robot mask. 105 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:16,043 Howard was so angry, I had to mash up Benadryl in his ice cream... 106 00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:18,288 ...to get him to fall asleep. 107 00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:23,728 I guess this is what we get for being with two testosterone-fueled alpha males. 108 00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:26,962 At some point, they're bound to lock horns. 109 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:30,607 I'm assuming these are some kind of horns they bought at Comic-Con? 110 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,440 I'm really sorry they took Sheldon's spot away. 111 00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:38,644 He shouldn't have to suffer just because Howard's a big deal now. 112 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:42,566 I know. Sheldon should just let Howard have his little moment in the sun. 113 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:44,605 What's that supposed to mean? 114 00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,560 Well, I mean, Howard's never gonna go to space again... 115 00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:50,565 ...but Sheldon will always be a genius. 116 00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:55,846 You're right. And I'm sure Sheldon will get a fancy parking spot again... 117 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,322 ...if and when he makes a worthwhile contribution to science. 118 00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:03,971 - If and when? - Maybe we should change the subject. 119 00:07:04,160 --> 00:07:07,004 Amy, how are your lady parts? Still chilly down there? 120 00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:13,763 Hang on. None of Sheldon's theories have ever been definitively proven. 121 00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:16,531 My husband actually went to outer space. 122 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,370 That's an impressive accomplishment. 123 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,967 He's now an inspiration to millions of Americans... 124 00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:25,324 ...who know you don't have to be special or even qualified to go into space. 125 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,808 You know, I remember the first time I got a bikini wax. 126 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:32,891 My sister did it with melted Crayolas and duct tape. 127 00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:35,970 Yeah, it's a bad idea. 128 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,281 Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. 129 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:44,969 Is it maybe because, like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical? 130 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,329 Damn. 131 00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,803 Well, at least when we do make love... 132 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:56,571 ...Sheldon won't be thinking about his mother. 133 00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:02,243 That is a cleverly veiled reference to Howard's lifelong obsession... 134 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:04,641 ...to crawl back into her spacious womb. 135 00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:10,644 Anyway, to this day, I still can't see a box of crayons without crossing my legs. Ha, ha. 136 00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:13,650 I don't have to take this. 137 00:08:13,880 --> 00:08:16,770 I'm gonna go home and have sex with my husband right now. 138 00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:20,163 Maybe I'll let him do it to me in the parking spot. 139 00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:25,441 Which sounds dirty but I didn't mean it that way. 140 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,089 Okay, here's another one. 141 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:33,728 If a zombie bites a vampire... 142 00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:35,604 ...and the vampire bites a human... 143 00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:39,691 ...does the human become a vampire or a zombie? 144 00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:42,602 Or a zompire? 145 00:08:44,680 --> 00:08:46,364 Sheldon? 146 00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:48,369 Cookie? 147 00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:52,246 - I don't have any. - Well, I'm not giving it away. 148 00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:58,200 HOWARD: Hi, Sheldon. - Aah! 149 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:03,200 He's in my spot. 150 00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:06,131 Leonard, make him stop being naked in my spot. 151 00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:09,202 Howard, what are you doing? 152 00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:11,644 He wasn't using it... 153 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:17,648 ...and I needed a nice cool piece of leather to wiggle my naked ass on. 154 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:20,327 Get off there. 155 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:21,970 Give me back my Iron Man helmet. 156 00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:23,480 Give back my parking space. 157 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,166 You don't need a parking space. You don't have a car. 158 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,449 You don't need an Iron Man helmet. You're not Iron Man. 159 00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:33,322 Well, we appear to have reached an impasse... 160 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:36,484 ...and, you know, I have to say, I thought you'd be more upset... 161 00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:39,809 ...that your laptop is sitting on my junk. 162 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,241 I didn't pick up on that. That's a nice touch. 163 00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:59,201 This is so exciting. I'm feeling all tingly. 164 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,330 Although, that could just be my newly defoliated bikini zone. 165 00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:04,521 Keep a lookout. 166 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:07,366 This place is swarming with campus security. 167 00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,046 They will not hesitate to scold us. 168 00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:12,011 Freaking pigs. 169 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,048 Oh, yeah. 170 00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:24,404 Okay, now pull your car into the spot and let's get out of here. 171 00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:26,284 Wait, I'm leaving my car here? 172 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:28,841 Yes. And be sure and put on the emergency brake. 173 00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:31,486 It really makes these things tough to budge. 174 00:10:31,680 --> 00:10:34,160 Before I park, come in the backseat. 175 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:37,051 I wanna show you something I had done today. 176 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:40,529 All right. Color me intrigued. 177 00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:46,331 AMY: What do you think? 178 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,251 SHELDON: I think you're high on paint fumes. 179 00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:52,924 And, boy, that's a lot of Band-Aids. 180 00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:58,683 Okay, Howard's mother is in, like, every one of your wedding photos. 181 00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,920 What can I tell you? She's a big girl. 182 00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:07,970 Wherever you look, there she is. 183 00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,000 More coffee? 184 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:12,407 No, Leonard's taking me to a physics lecture... 185 00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,251 ...and coffee will just keep me awake. 186 00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:16,487 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 187 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,210 Oh, I'll get it. 188 00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:25,406 Oh, looks like someone's on Team Bernadette. 189 00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:29,367 - Where's Howard? - He's not here. What's wrong? 190 00:11:29,560 --> 00:11:32,769 He had my car towed. It cost me $200 to get it back. 191 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,286 Oh, no. 192 00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,568 Where was it parked? 193 00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:40,245 In Sheldon's spot. 194 00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:43,410 Well, that doesn't make sense. Sheldon doesn't have a spot. 195 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:46,490 Was it maybe in Howard's spot? 196 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:51,527 Don't play dumb with me, sister. You tell your husband he owes me $200. 197 00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:54,405 - Well, that doesn't make sense either. - Why not? 198 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:57,285 Because I'm the one who had it towed. 199 00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:03,527 - You? - Didn't see that one coming, did you? 200 00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:06,766 Oh, yeah? Well, you're not gonna see this coming. 201 00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,643 PENNY: Aah! - Oh, my God! Oh, my God, are you okay? 202 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:11,847 (PENNY YELLS) 203 00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:14,486 PENNY: What the hell do you have in there? - My wallet, keys... 204 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,849 ...and a coffee can full of change I've been meaning to take to the bank. 205 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,440 - Don't move. I'll get some ice. - Are you okay? 206 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:25,804 PENNY: Get away from me, or I swear to God, I will rip out what's left of your pubes. 207 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,162 BERNADETTE: Here. PENNY: Oh, thanks. Aah. 208 00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:30,561 Amy, you think maybe this has gotten out of hand? 209 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:32,649 PENNY: Gee, you think? 210 00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:36,803 I do. Penny, Bernadette and I are sorry. 211 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,651 - You hit her. What did I do? - You had my car towed. 212 00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:42,764 - You were parked in Howard's spot. - I was in Sheldon's spot. 213 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:44,371 Sheldon doesn't have a spot. 214 00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:46,961 PENNY: Guys, I think I need to go to the emergency room. 215 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,168 - Okay, let's go. - I'll drive. You can see... 216 00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:53,365 - ...where the tow truck scratched my car. - The tow truck didn't scratch your car. 217 00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:56,171 - How do you know? - Because I did it. 218 00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:07,690 Morning, Professor Stevens. 219 00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:11,487 Hey, don't look at that whiteboard. That's my math, not your math. 220 00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:12,846 Keep walking, nosy. 221 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:17,046 What the hell are you doing? 222 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:23,162 Oh. You said I'm not using my space, so I'm using it. 223 00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:27,890 Okay, you need to move now. 224 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,570 No, I don't. 225 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:31,688 You can't stay there forever. 226 00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:37,410 Actually, I have a plastic baggy strapped to my leg that says I can. 227 00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:40,326 Give up, Wolowitz. 228 00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:44,081 You've chosen to tangle with a superior intellect you can't defeat. 229 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,924 There is nothing you could possibly do to... 230 00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,162 (HORN HONKING) 231 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,164 Those aren't gonna help you, Sheldon. 232 00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:00,330 Oh, yes, they are. I mean, what? 233 00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:03,000 I'm warning you, Sheldon. 234 00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:04,690 Your threats are empty. 235 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:06,370 Nothing can move me. 236 00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,648 - Stop that! HOWARD: Get out of my spot! 237 00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:12,844 No. That's it. I am calling campus security. 238 00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:16,570 You prepare for the scolding of your life. 239 00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:18,285 What are you idiots doing? 240 00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,450 He's trying to kill me, Leonard. 241 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:23,843 Video games and rock music have desensitized him to violence. 242 00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:29,288 Would you please talk some sense into your lunatic roommate? 243 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:32,444 You're both acting like lunatics. It's just a parking spot. 244 00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:33,806 Not just a parking spot. 245 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,964 He can't handle the fact that I'm a bigger deal than he is now. 246 00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:40,369 Oh, preposterous. I have been solely responsible... 247 00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:43,604 ...for this university's six-loop quantum gravity calculations. 248 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,804 I have changed the way we think about Bose-Einstein condensates... 249 00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:49,407 ...and I am also the one who got Nutter Butters... 250 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:51,284 ...in the cafeteria vending machine. 251 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:57,169 Maybe you missed that news while you were floating around like a goof in outer space. 252 00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:01,608 Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do. 253 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:03,485 Can you believe this guy? 254 00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:06,007 What I don't believe is you tried to run him over. 255 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,322 Oh, like you've never thought of doing that. 256 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:13,122 Don't hate me just because I lived the dream. 257 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:14,441 (HORN HONKS) 258 00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:17,689 Hey, sweet ride. 259 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:21,691 What are you doing in there? 260 00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:24,923 Just breaking in your new car. 261 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,169 Stop that! You stop that! 262 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:30,521 You know what they say. 263 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:34,520 Revenge is a dish best served nude. 264 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:39,525 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 265 00:15:39,680 --> 00:15:42,047 - Hey, got a minute? - Oh, of course, come in. 266 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:52,603 This is an authentic Chinese throwing star, and I must warn you... 267 00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:55,525 ...I have seen many people throw them in movies. 268 00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:59,044 Calm down. Howard has something he wants to say to you. 269 00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:00,727 HOWARD: All right. 270 00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:07,487 Sheldon, when this whole thing with the parking space started... 271 00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:11,810 ...I had no idea just how much of a crazy bastard... 272 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:15,288 Howard, that's not how we practiced it. 273 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:19,649 I had no idea how much that spot meant to you. 274 00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:22,411 Anyway, I called President Seibert... 275 00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:26,531 ...and told him it's not worth fighting over the spot... 276 00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:28,404 ...so you keep it... 277 00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,644 ...and I'll park in the structure across the street. 278 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,923 Well, Howard, thank you. 279 00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:39,091 That's quite a gesture on your part. 280 00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,846 You've shown yourself to be the bigger man. 281 00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:45,089 - Thank you. - Which I find totally unacceptable. 282 00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:47,410 I must be the bigger man. 283 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,003 Therefore, you may use my spot... 284 00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:56,967 ...until such time as I learn to drive or get a Batmobile. 285 00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:01,569 Wow, okay. Well, thanks. 286 00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:03,922 I don't know what to say. 287 00:17:04,120 --> 00:17:07,203 There is nothing to say. Except I'm the bigger man. 288 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:08,686 (HOWARD CHUCKLES) 289 00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:10,689 I'm not kidding. Say it. 290 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:14,247 Just say it. 291 00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,888 You're the bigger man, Sheldon. 292 00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:18,730 Oh, stop. 293 00:17:19,840 --> 00:17:23,003 And I believe this is yours. 294 00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:27,366 FYI, if you wear that into a bank, they will tackle you to the ground. 295 00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:34,291 I'd like to propose a toast. 296 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:36,403 To burying the hatchet. 297 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:38,804 To burying the hatchet. 298 00:17:41,120 --> 00:17:43,168 You know, I'm kind of glad this happened. 299 00:17:43,360 --> 00:17:47,081 Me too. In a weird way, I kind of feel like it brought us closer. 300 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,651 Yeah, everybody's happy. Great. 301 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:01,447 CLEANER: Can I help you? 302 00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:05,401 Yes, according to information I gleaned from Yelp... 303 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:09,804 ...you had great success when a SantariaSuzy37... 304 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,083 ...brought you a pair of leather slacks stained with chicken blood. 305 00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:17,370 You know, I believe I may have a similar problem. 306 00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:24,602 This cushion experienced a nude revenge wiggle. 307 00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:27,610 A what? 308 00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:30,003 A naked man sat on it. 309 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:31,886 Now, here's my concern. 310 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:35,567 His diet is rich in fatty deli meats. 311 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,969 What tests do you have to detect lipid residue? 312 00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:42,484 Lipid what? 313 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,963 Lipid residue. 314 00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:47,810 An anal autograph. 315 00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:52,003 A colon calling card, if you will. 316 00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:57,684 - Tuesday okay? - Oh. 317 00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:02,209 Don't rush it. We may be dealing with befoulment on a molecular level. 318 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:04,968 Let me write you a ticket. 319 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:08,806 Is that your son? 320 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:10,769 Uh-huh. 321 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,924 Looks like that laptop's seen better days. 322 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,845 If you're interested, I'm selling this. 323 00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:18,451 It's only 2 years old... 324 00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:20,244 ...has 16 gigabytes of RAM... 325 00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:22,249 ...Intel Core i7 processor... 326 00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,164 ...and I can personally guarantee... 327 00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:28,570 ...it has spent less than 20 minutes resting on an astronaut's penis.