1 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,523 I was reading about this jellyfish that never dies. 2 00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:09,883 Instead it reverts to its asexual state and then grows up again. 3 00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:13,482 We thought my 90-year-old grandfather had reverted to an asexual state... 4 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:16,889 ...but the lawsuit from his Jamaican caregiver proved us all wrong. 5 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:20,843 My point is, immortality is not only a possibility, it is real. 6 00:00:21,080 --> 00:00:23,401 Only if you're this jellyfish, which periodically... 7 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,410 ...reverts to a mass of undifferentiated protoplasm. 8 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:29,888 If I could keep my Gmail account, I'd be okay with that. 9 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:32,847 -: (IN RHOTACISTIC VOICE) Hello, fellas. LEONARD: Hey, buddy. 10 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:35,202 - How are you? - Remember we were trying to figure out... 11 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:38,290 ...what that smell coming from Professor Tupperman's office was? 12 00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:40,562 HOWARD: Yeah. - Turns out it was Tupperman. 13 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:43,565 Dead at his desk for two weeks. 14 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:45,881 HOWARD: Terrible. - Oh, my God. 15 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:48,765 In lieu of flowers, the department chair is asking... 16 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:51,645 ...that everyone donate a bottle of Febreze. 17 00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:55,126 If we're going to change the topic from jellyfish... 18 00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:59,570 ...I'd be okay with brine shrimp or the history of the unicycle. 19 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,206 Show a little compassion. The man died. 20 00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:04,084 And turned into a puddle of goo. 21 00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:08,126 Now, we can either sit around and cry over spilt professor... 22 00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:13,611 ...or we can rejoice in the knowledge that a tenured position has just opened up. 23 00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:16,490 I choose to do the latter. 24 00:01:16,960 --> 00:01:19,850 Excuse me, the whole tenure system is ridiculous. 25 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:23,886 A guaranteed job for life only encourages the faculty to become complacent. 26 00:01:24,080 --> 00:01:26,003 If we really want science to advance... 27 00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:29,488 ...people should have chips implanted in their skulls... 28 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:32,490 ...that explode when they say something stupid. 29 00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:38,809 Well, I believe people do their best work when they feel safe and secure. 30 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,365 (MIMICS CHIP EXPLODING) 31 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,646 If you need my nose, you'll find it firmly lodged... 32 00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,366 ...up the rectum of the tenure committee. 33 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:52,125 You PhDs gonna go suck up like Kripke? 34 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:56,006 No. I mean, I'll apply, but I'm not gonna stoop to playing politics. 35 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,328 Yeah, me neither. It should be about the work. 36 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,524 And if I can't get tenure, I'd like to see you or Sheldon get it. 37 00:02:01,760 --> 00:02:06,049 Raj, don't dangle false hope in front of Leonard like that. 38 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,810 Excuse me, but I think I'm just as qualified as you are. 39 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,568 (MIMICS CHIPS EXPLODING) 40 00:02:40,440 --> 00:02:43,250 - So "tenured" means a job for life? - Yep. 41 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:44,641 And you can't get fired... 42 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:46,888 - ...even if you're bad at it? - Mm, not really. 43 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:50,801 Wow, sounds a lot like being a pretty waitress at the Cheesecake Factory. 44 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,047 (CHUCKLES) 45 00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:55,081 While I disagree with the premise of tenure... 46 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:58,091 ...if they gave it to me, it wouldn't diminish my output. 47 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:02,604 I'm like the sun. I can't turn this off. 48 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:08,082 - Are Rajesh and Leonard competing as well? - Mm-hm. 49 00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:11,363 Do they know they don't stand a chance because you're so great? 50 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:13,286 Well put. 51 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:17,683 I must say, I go back and forth on this boyfriend-girlfriend thing... 52 00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:21,527 ...but those moments when you worship me really keep you in the running. 53 00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:28,123 It would be nice to have the income, stop taking money from my parents. 54 00:03:28,360 --> 00:03:31,011 Money from family does come with strings attached. 55 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:32,884 You have no idea. 56 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:38,962 They buy me a new BMW for my birthday, but can I get seat warmers? No. 57 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:42,407 "If you want a warm butt, pay for it yourself." 58 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:45,171 Well, maybe I will, old man. 59 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:50,724 I think that's enough wine for now. 60 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,804 I just keep thinking how cool it would be if I called my mom... 61 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:58,607 - ...and told her that I got tenure at CalTech. - She'd be proud, huh? 62 00:03:58,840 --> 00:04:02,083 Oh, very. Assuming she takes my call. Heh. 63 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:06,526 My primary concern with being granted tenure... 64 00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:09,969 ...is living with an insanely jealous roommate after the fact. 65 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:15,166 I might need to sleep with a gun under my pillow. Or a chainsaw. 66 00:04:15,920 --> 00:04:20,130 Or you take advantage of your newfound economic stability and move out... 67 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:25,207 ...buy a house, get married, start a family. 68 00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:30,009 Or the chainsaw. 69 00:04:32,520 --> 00:04:38,209 And I will return to New Delhi in triumph atop a bejeweled white elephant. 70 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:43,601 And you know what will be on that elephant's back? A seat warmer. 71 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,363 "No, Father, you may not have a ride!" 72 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:52,643 I'm gonna make some coffee. 73 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,089 So who do you schmooze to get this deal? 74 00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:59,727 I'm not gonna schmooze anybody. I'm gonna let my work speak for itself. 75 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:04,245 - That's great. That shows a lot of integrity. - Thank you. 76 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:06,801 I'm a naive idiot, right? 77 00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:08,970 Oh, good, you heard me. 78 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:14,002 If you really want tenure, cozy up to the people making the decision. 79 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:17,006 Sheldon Cooper does not do cozy. 80 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,643 You don't say. 81 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:24,209 But I suppose it wouldn't hurt to know who's on the committee. 82 00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:28,485 Let's see. Janine Davis. Oh, dear. 83 00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:32,050 - Is that a problem? - Well... 84 00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:35,005 Even you. You're a slave. 85 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,002 I'm a what? 86 00:05:42,840 --> 00:05:45,286 Not sure, it could go either way. 87 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:59,441 - Hey, Mrs. Davis. - Hey. 88 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:01,404 Dr. Hofstadter. 89 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:05,525 Just thought I'd come down and start getting ready for swimsuit season. 90 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:07,961 Good for you. 91 00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:11,522 Not that you need it. I bet you look great in a swimsuit. 92 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,284 Thank you. 93 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:16,847 I've got what my father used to call furniture disease. 94 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:19,566 My chest is falling into my drawers. Ha, ha. 95 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:28,968 I'm not, uh, familiar with this model. How do I make it start? 96 00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:31,404 You push "start." 97 00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:33,481 Right. Heh. 98 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:37,486 (BEEPS) 99 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,804 This one might be broken. 100 00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:44,640 You have to move. 101 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:46,925 Got it. Heh. 102 00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:49,968 Oh. Heh, heh. 103 00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:58,683 Oh, yeah. 104 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:01,208 Yeah, now I'm feeling it. 105 00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:04,489 Oh, this is great. 106 00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:06,682 (PANTING) I could do this for the rest of my life. 107 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:11,491 Hey, speaking of things you do for the rest of your life... 108 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:14,524 ...uh, did I read that you're on that tenure committee? 109 00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:15,841 Yep. 110 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:18,687 I gotta get a home gym. 111 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:23,049 I'm sure you have a lot of good applicants. 112 00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:25,882 I just wanted to say hi... 113 00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:29,602 ...and let you know that I'll be throwing my hat in the... 114 00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:31,205 (PUFFER HISSES) 115 00:07:31,880 --> 00:07:33,882 ...ring. 116 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,441 - All right, I'll keep an eye out for that. - Yeah. 117 00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:39,328 Hey, Hofstadter. 118 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:43,884 Funny seeing you here for the first time in ever. 119 00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:46,802 Go away. 120 00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:50,486 - Janine the machine, let's do this. - Hey, Barry. 121 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:55,803 Oh, look at that. Burned a whole calorie. 122 00:07:56,400 --> 00:08:00,371 I guess you got here early to burn off that banana bread I baked you. 123 00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:03,006 - Yeah, it was delicious. Thank you. - No, my pleasure. 124 00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:06,921 If you like banana bread, I've got a great recipe. 125 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:10,084 The trick is in fresh ground... 126 00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:12,806 I'll e-mail it to you. 127 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,446 All right, I'm warm. Ready to kick it up a notch? 128 00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:16,727 Let's go. 129 00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:18,206 (MACHINES BEEP) 130 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:20,368 That's enough cardio for me, guys. 131 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:23,809 Gonna stretch out before I hit the weights. 132 00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:28,931 You okay? 133 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:31,883 Call someone. 134 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:35,606 (BEEPS) 135 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,809 Good day, Mrs. Davis. 136 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:44,210 This is Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali from the Astrophysics Department. 137 00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:48,200 Don't be alarmed, I'm not really in space. 138 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:50,484 (RAJESH SNORTS) 139 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:56,605 Anywho, I'd like to take this opportunity to tell you about myself. 140 00:08:56,880 --> 00:09:01,602 So sit back, relax, and enjoy the following 90-minute video. 141 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:04,724 Oh, come on. 142 00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:09,725 RAJESH: (ON COMPUTER) Born in New Delhi, the third son of an itinerant gynecologist... 143 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:12,846 ...I showed early signs of genius. 144 00:09:13,040 --> 00:09:16,442 At the age of 5, I discovered a celestial object... 145 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:20,406 ...which later turned out to be the moon. 146 00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:22,967 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 147 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:26,090 SHELDON: Mrs. Davis. Mrs. Davis. Mrs. Davis. 148 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,851 Oh, God, they're everywhere. 149 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:30,846 Come in. 150 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:36,166 - Dr. Cooper, how can I help you? - Yes, hello. I'm fine. 151 00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:42,971 I understand you may have a bad impression of me, so I bought you a gift. 152 00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:46,004 - Dr. Cooper, that's not necessary. - It's too late. 153 00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:48,686 Get ready to like me. 154 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:54,409 Roots? 155 00:09:57,360 --> 00:10:02,161 The tragic history of slavery in America. Fun for the whole family. 156 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:06,885 Why would you think this is an appropriate gift? 157 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,366 Um... 158 00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,365 Well... 159 00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:16,204 You are black, right? 160 00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:20,845 This meeting has come to an end. 161 00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:24,563 Because you wanna start watching it right now. Copy that. 162 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:27,690 Let's see. 163 00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:31,566 Up next on the tenure committee is... 164 00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:33,529 Professor Woo. 165 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:37,406 Get ready for the complete works of Jackie Chan. 166 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,490 Gentlemen. 167 00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:49,003 - Where have you been? - Nurse's office. 168 00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:52,526 - Asthma attack? - Asthma, heart. Some kind of attack. 169 00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:54,290 I'm fine, though. 170 00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:57,807 You guys going to Professor Tupperman's memorial? 171 00:10:58,000 --> 00:10:59,764 - Probably not. - Barely knew him. 172 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:03,851 Yeah, you wouldn't wanna look like you guys are brownnosing the tenure committee... 173 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:05,724 ...who will all be there. 174 00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:11,090 Oh, yeah. That's what I was hoping for: meerkats. 175 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:21,806 I won't be able to make our date night this Thursday, so bad news for you. 176 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:25,283 You better have a good excuse this time. 177 00:11:25,480 --> 00:11:28,643 Because trimming Q-tips to fit your ears right is obvious nonsense. 178 00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:34,451 First of all, when you say things like that, people think you're crazy. 179 00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:36,449 Second, the reason I'm canceling... 180 00:11:36,640 --> 00:11:40,167 ...is because I have to attend a memorial service for Professor Tupperman. 181 00:11:40,720 --> 00:11:43,405 - That sounds like a long and tedious evening. - Ah, it will be. 182 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:46,285 Honestly, if I must endure a long and tedious evening... 183 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:49,006 ...I'd rather it be with you on date night. 184 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:53,610 But I have no choice. The tenure committee is going to be there. 185 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:56,531 Oh, well, in that case, perhaps I should come along. 186 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,287 Now that I think about it, that would be helpful. 187 00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:00,527 Of course it would. 188 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:04,361 I'm well versed in academic politics, and as a respected scientist... 189 00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:06,927 ...I can only raise your stock as a candidate. 190 00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,367 Actually, I meant you could drive me. 191 00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:14,851 But if it makes you happy, that other stuff too. 192 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:23,403 - Do anything interesting today? - Not really. I was out shopping with Amy. 193 00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:26,331 She wanted me to help her find something for this memorial. 194 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:29,808 What, Sheldon's going to be there? We all promised we weren't gonna go. 195 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,162 - Oh. What a jerk. - I know. 196 00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:35,204 I was hoping to go without anyone finding out. 197 00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:39,443 Well, since Amy's going, do you want me there, you know, to support you? 198 00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:43,440 Oh. That's nice, but it's just gonna be a room full of boring old men. 199 00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:45,324 I'm not sure how much help you'd be. 200 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:49,206 Okay. I'm just gonna tie my shoe while you think about that. Ahem. 201 00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:00,723 Oh, yeah. No, thanks. That would be great help. 202 00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:06,005 - You realize you might kill some of them. - Then you all can get tenure. 203 00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:14,003 Come on, Daddy. All the other scientists have seat warmers. 204 00:13:15,480 --> 00:13:18,882 This is so humiliating. I've got to get tenure. 205 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:24,287 Okay, let's meet halfway. How about I cut my cleaning lady down to twice a week? 206 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:28,083 Looks like we're both going to be living like animals. 207 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:33,607 Let's go over our emotional responses one last time. 208 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:34,847 Okay. 209 00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:38,410 Professor Tupperman is dead and that makes us...? 210 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:40,329 Sad. 211 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:45,563 The fact that there are so many people here doesn't make us cranky and claustrophobic. 212 00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:48,565 - It makes us...? - Glad. 213 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,326 Giving Mrs. Davis the box set of Roots was...? 214 00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:54,688 Bad. 215 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:56,570 - However... - No. 216 00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:58,091 Fine, bad. 217 00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,449 Unbelievable. 218 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:04,883 You have some nerve showing up just to schmooze the tenure committee. 219 00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:06,127 You're here. 220 00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:09,284 Excuse me, I'm here to pay my respects to Professor Tupperware... 221 00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:10,925 ...or whatever his name is. 222 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:15,768 So am I. His passing makes me feel bad. 223 00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:21,530 Well, well, well, Sheldon, fancy meeting you here. 224 00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:25,406 I guess the train store in Glendale wasn't having a cotillion after all. 225 00:14:26,840 --> 00:14:29,241 And you. You said you weren't coming here either. 226 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:32,011 I have a thick accent. You don't know what I said. 227 00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:37,768 - I'd like to know why Penny's here. - I'm here to support my man, just like you. 228 00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,121 What are you going to do? 229 00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:41,926 Take people's drink orders and get them wrong? 230 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:45,490 Do it. 231 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:01,361 What? Did she do it yet? 232 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:08,330 She plans on flirting with members of the tenure committee to further Leonard's cause. 233 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:11,490 Well, that's a fine how-do-you-do. 234 00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:14,371 Don't just stand there, take your breasts out. 235 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:19,689 Ooh, meerkat fight. 236 00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:24,807 You're all wasting your time. Sheldon is the most qualified for the job... 237 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:28,482 ...and no amount of gravity-defying bosom is gonna change that. 238 00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:33,328 Seriously, is that tape? Like, how are they staying up like that? 239 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,971 Way to hit them with both barrels. 240 00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,848 You two should be ashamed of yourselves. 241 00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:43,401 Using women to advance your cause with sexuality... 242 00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,409 ...and whatever Amy plans on doing. 243 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:49,405 Are you implying my girlfriend... 244 00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,921 - ...has no sexuality to exploit? - Yes. 245 00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:54,088 - Okay, because that wasn't clear. - Sheldon. 246 00:15:57,400 --> 00:15:59,721 What? That was ambiguous. 247 00:15:59,920 --> 00:16:02,366 Well, now it's biguous. What are you gonna do about it? 248 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:04,841 - Um... - Talk some smack about his mother. 249 00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:08,169 Yes, of course, he wouldn't like that at all. 250 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:11,051 Last night, I was feeling in need of sexual release... 251 00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:14,443 ...when I happened to come across your mother. 252 00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:19,728 - Okay, guys, what are we doing here? - I don't know what you're doing... 253 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:24,847 ...but I was about to insinuate that I had coitus with Raj's mother for a dollar. 254 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:30,081 Well, you do what you want, but I don't wanna lose my friends over tenure. 255 00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:32,487 - Friends are forever. - Ahem. So is tenure. 256 00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:34,370 Walk. 257 00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,164 I'm just gonna go home and let my work speak for itself. 258 00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:41,249 You're right. This is beneath me. 259 00:16:41,440 --> 00:16:44,284 Like your mother was last night. 260 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:47,647 How about it, Sheldon? 261 00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:51,081 What do you think I should do? 262 00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:54,164 Well, you'll always be an academic success... 263 00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:59,691 ...but I seriously question whether you'll make any more friends. 264 00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:04,771 Oh, I don't want any more, but let's go. 265 00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:07,970 Are you kidding? I would love to babysit for you. 266 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,050 JANINE: I could not ask you to do that. - Nonsense, children love me. 267 00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:15,211 Something about me just makes them laugh and laugh. 268 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,883 No, we cannot lose to that jerk. 269 00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:28,243 - Yeah, screw it. I'm going in. - Hold on. 270 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:32,802 "Screw it, I'm going in" is what I said to your mother last night. 271 00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:37,849 Don't worry, I didn't really say that. 272 00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:41,768 I find the concept of coitus ridiculous and off-putting. 273 00:17:44,040 --> 00:17:46,611 Should have taken my breasts out while I had the chance. 274 00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:59,891 Mrs. Davis. Mrs. Davis. Mrs. Davis. 275 00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:04,369 I know you're in there. I saw your car in the parking lot. 276 00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:07,167 What? 277 00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:10,170 I just found out that you recommended myself... 278 00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:14,325 ...Dr. Hofstadter and Dr. Koothrappali to be on the short list for tenure. 279 00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:16,329 Well, despite your quirks... 280 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:19,888 ...the three of you are very accomplished in your respective fields. 281 00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:27,081 I don't know what you mean by quirks, but I do want to express my gratitude. 282 00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:30,807 - You didn't bring another gift, did you? - No, no, I learned my lesson. 283 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:33,930 - I understand that was inappropriate. - Good. 284 00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:37,567 - Anyway, thank you. - You're welcome. 285 00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:48,166 I'm gonna pretend that didn't happen. 286 00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:50,850 SHELDON: Right on, sister.