1 00:00:03,360 --> 00:00:05,442 - Hey, can I ask you a question? - Sure. 2 00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:06,726 You've had this dart board since I've known you. 3 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:08,000 But I've never seen you play. 4 00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:10,441 Oh, we played... once. 5 00:00:10,600 --> 00:00:12,329 I broke a window. 6 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:13,527 What window? 7 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:15,284 That one over there. 8 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,807 Leonard, where are the Skee-Ball tickets? 9 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:20,166 Skee-Ball tickets? 10 00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:22,561 Yeah, from when we went to the arcade three years ago? 11 00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:24,449 I finally decided what prize I want. 12 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:27,727 Hurry UP- 13 00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,448 If I still have them, they're probably in the junk box. 14 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:35,126 - Ooh, what are you gonna get? - None of your business. 15 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:38,648 But when you see me wearing a flower in my lapel later, 16 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,768 you are most welcome to sniff it. 17 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:45,485 - Yup, got 'em, here you go. - Oh, thank you. 18 00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:48,405 Here, get yourself an eraser for your troubles. 19 00:00:51,680 --> 00:00:53,364 Oh, I forgot about this. 20 00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:56,241 My aunt made it for me when I started college. 21 00:00:59,280 --> 00:01:01,886 Aw, did she hate you? 22 00:01:02,840 --> 00:01:04,842 Why? Because I got an ugly, itchy sweater, 23 00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:07,566 and my brother got a car? No, I was her favorite. 24 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,320 Yeah, I seem to be a few tickets short. 25 00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:11,805 Are there more in the box? 26 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:13,644 I think I got them all. 27 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:15,569 Nope, they're not in there. 28 00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:17,683 Well, you barely looked. Let me see. 29 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:21,481 No, no, no, I looked, and... No more tickets. 30 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:23,921 - Leonard, let me look in the box. - Okay, Okay! 31 00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:28,925 I'm gonna show you what's in the box. But just... promise not to flip out? 32 00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:32,766 Why would I flip out? Is it a spider? 33 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:34,160 It's a spider! 34 00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:39,531 No, if it was a spider, Lenny would've flipped out. 35 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:43,605 Okay, Sheldon, I know I was supposed to return this DVD a long time ago, 36 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:45,683 and I know we rented it on your card. 37 00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:47,842 But it's been, like, seven years, 38 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:49,520 and clearly nothing bad has happened. 39 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:53,929 So instead of being a giant pain in the ass, like you always are, 40 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:58,210 what if this one time you just tried staying calm? 41 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:05,724 That seems like a reasonable request. 42 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:10,570 Although so did, "Hey, Leonard, would you mind returning that DVD?" 43 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:14,483 I'm sorry. I'll take care of it. 44 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:16,885 Okay. 45 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:18,847 I mean it. I'm going to. 46 00:02:20,880 --> 00:02:22,644 I believe you. 47 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:25,970 And you're going to stay calm? 48 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:28,201 I said I would. 49 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:34,401 How about that? 50 00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:38,649 Sheldon's being reasonable. 51 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:40,888 Yeah, it's freaking me out. I'm gonna go. 52 00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:11,087 So... when you say 53 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:13,720 you're not going to freak out about the DVD, 54 00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:15,490 here's what that means. 55 00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:18,085 Don't fixate on it, 56 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:20,049 don't wake me up in the middle of the night, 57 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:23,443 or nag me through the door while I'm on the toilet. 58 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,326 Okay, first, talking to you while you're on the toilet 59 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:29,801 isn't exactly a picnic for me either. 60 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:33,683 Remember, when you can hear me, I can hear you. 61 00:03:35,440 --> 00:03:37,681 And, second, you completely disregard 62 00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:40,684 how uncomfortable unresolved issues are for me. 63 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:44,367 It's like, an itch in my brain I can't scratch. 64 00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:48,767 When I broke my arm I used to stick a coat hanger down there. 65 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,971 You ever try that? Maybe go in through the ear? 66 00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:56,481 You wouldn't make jokes if you could feel the way I feel. 67 00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:58,969 Well, I don't know how to do that. 68 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,450 How about this? 69 00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:05,365 I promise I won't pester you about the DVD. 70 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:10,003 You can defecate in peace. That's a win for both of us. 71 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:11,525 But... 72 00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:13,967 until this matter is resolved, 73 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:15,531 I would like you 74 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:17,364 to wear this sweater. 75 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,247 With nothing underneath it. 76 00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:25,851 That's stupid. Why? 77 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:28,765 You say it's itchy and uncomfortable. 78 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,730 I say situations like this make me feel the same way. 79 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,565 I'm telling you, try the hanger. 80 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:37,284 Put it on. 81 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:38,930 Let's share the experience. 82 00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,449 You got it. 83 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:45,001 If this sweater shuts you up, I'm gonna make a fortune 84 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:46,963 selling them to everyone we know. 85 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:50,450 Now all I need to do 86 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:52,841 is head down to the video store 87 00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:55,008 and return the DVD. 88 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:01,406 Oh, did I forget to tell you? 89 00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:04,803 That store went out of business years ago. 90 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:09,446 Really? 91 00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:12,685 How those nipples feeling, chief? 92 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:18,530 Penny, can we please get our drinks? 93 00:05:18,680 --> 00:05:19,960 Yeah, hang on, just give me sec. 94 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:23,685 At work today, I did an in vivo stereotaxic surgery. 95 00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:27,407 Cool. At my lab, I performed ten laser capture micro-dissections. 96 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,723 I scraped gum off the bottom of that table. 97 00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:33,724 Only because my manager saw me put it there. 98 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:35,607 Oh, my gosh. 99 00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:37,762 That's the girl that broke Rajesh's heart. 100 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:39,001 That's Lucy? 101 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:41,481 I don't know why but I always pictured her as Indian. 102 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:43,688 I think that reason's called racism. 103 00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:46,561 I'm gonna go talk to her. 104 00:05:46,720 --> 00:05:48,609 Why? What are you gonna say? 105 00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:51,001 I'm not gonna say anything. I just want to check her out. 106 00:05:51,024 --> 00:05:54,891 Because she hurt my friend. My Indian friend. 107 00:05:55,080 --> 00:05:56,605 Who's racist now? 108 00:05:56,760 --> 00:06:00,207 You because you just called him your "Indian friend." 109 00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:03,451 Yeah, well, you're short. 110 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:08,169 We're never getting our drinks. 111 00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:10,049 No, but we knew that. 112 00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:13,240 Hey, can I start you off with something to drink? 113 00:06:13,264 --> 00:06:15,471 - Oh, water would be great. - Okay. 114 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:19,326 You're Lucy, right? I'm a friend of Raj Koothrappali's. 115 00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:20,965 Actually Amy recognized you. 116 00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:30,803 Wow. How's he doing? 117 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:32,371 Oh, you know, he's good. 118 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:33,521 Great. 119 00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:35,808 Yeah, this is none of my business. 120 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,884 But why did you break up with him in an e-mail? 121 00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:41,325 Oh, I don't know. 122 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:43,323 I guess I thought it would be easier. 123 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,322 Yeah, I get that. I'll go get you your water. 124 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,851 When you say "easier," 125 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:53,570 you mean easier for you, right? 126 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:55,762 'Cause it certainly didn't make it easier for him. 127 00:06:56,640 --> 00:07:00,008 Any chance I can get a different waitress? 128 00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:02,240 I'm sorry, this is rude of me. I will get that water. 129 00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:06,363 See, see, see, see. 130 00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,602 Just now you expressed your feelings to my face. 131 00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:10,840 How come you could do that with me, but not with Raj? 132 00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:13,071 I don't know your e-mail. 133 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:17,081 You know what the worst part is? You're sitting here, perfectly happy 134 00:07:17,104 --> 00:07:18,683 and he's at home, a blubbering mess. 135 00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:20,240 Oh, I thought you said he was okay. 136 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:23,200 I also said I was getting you water, but look at me still standing here. 137 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:27,964 You know, I may be a bad waitress, but you are a bad person. 138 00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:31,203 Now, you want to hear the specials? 139 00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:54,323 - So, you can never take it off? - No. 140 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:55,561 Not even to sleep? 141 00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:56,960 No. 142 00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:58,969 So, you're just an idiot? 143 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:02,251 It's called proving a point. 144 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:04,209 Is the point you're an idiot? 145 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:07,170 Gentlemen, please. 146 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:10,881 Leonard is trying to walk a mile in my metaphorical shoes. 147 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:13,168 He can't walk in my actual shoes. 148 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:15,049 He has the feet of a toddler. 149 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:20,164 So, how are you gonna return the DVD if the store went out of business? 150 00:08:21,120 --> 00:08:24,567 Monday morning I'll go downtown, look up the owner's information, 151 00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,200 send him the DVD. 152 00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,767 Pay the late fee... 153 00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:34,048 and prove to Sheldon that you can have a problem... 154 00:08:34,240 --> 00:08:35,765 and solve it... 155 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:39,971 without acting like a complete lunatic. 156 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:41,361 Ahh! 157 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:45,320 And the man impersonating a bear would like everyone to know that, 158 00:08:45,344 --> 00:08:47,584 Only you can prevent forest fires. 159 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:51,401 I don't get it. 160 00:08:52,080 --> 00:08:53,764 You didn't have Smokey the Bear in India? 161 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:56,526 No. Oh, is he anything like Mun-Mun the Mongoose? 162 00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:00,328 He taught us not to play with cobras. 163 00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:04,520 You had to be taught not to play with cobras? 164 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:08,921 You had to be taught not to burn down the forest? 165 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,211 If you guys were hungry, why didn't you order at the restaurant? 166 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:23,124 We did. You never brought it. 167 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:27,044 Oh, that's right. 168 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,850 Nachos and a turkey club. 169 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:30,451 Not even close. 170 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,123 Well, I was too busy standing up for my friend 171 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:36,009 to worry about your... 172 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:38,367 I want to say salmon. 173 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:40,363 You want to say sorry. 174 00:09:46,680 --> 00:09:48,600 So, how are you gonna tell Raj abut what you did? 175 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:50,360 What do you mean "how"? What's the big deal? 176 00:09:50,384 --> 00:09:52,448 You told Lucy he was a pathetic mess. 177 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:54,489 Then you made her cry and leave. 178 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:56,404 Okay, you guys are overreacting. 179 00:09:56,560 --> 00:09:58,847 Raj is gonna appreciate how I had his back. 180 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:01,367 What is wrong with you, Penny?! 181 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:04,490 You ruined any chance I had of getting back with Lucy! 182 00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:07,163 Now she knows I'm a desperate mess 183 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:09,004 instead of just being pretty sure! 184 00:10:11,480 --> 00:10:13,084 It's Lucy. 185 00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:14,844 She wants to meet for coffee. 186 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,162 I love you, Penny! 187 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,481 Hey, what are you working on? 188 00:10:25,240 --> 00:10:27,891 I'm thinking about how one could use the fact 189 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:32,045 that a rapidly rotating mirror turns virtual photons into real ones 190 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:34,771 as a method of observing dark energy. 191 00:10:34,920 --> 00:10:36,524 That's a pretty cool idea. 192 00:10:36,680 --> 00:10:38,489 Yeah. It's great you're here. 193 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:40,244 I'd love to get an engineer's opinion. 194 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,447 Sure. 195 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,762 This chair is squeaky. 196 00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:49,722 Now, do I fix it or get a new one? 197 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:53,761 Well, Sheldon, it took me all morning, 198 00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:56,247 but I found the owner of the video store. 199 00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:59,085 And I am happy to report that he died peacefully in his sleep, 200 00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:00,924 drunk at the bottom of a pool. 201 00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:05,404 Anyway, there is no one to return the DVD to, 202 00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,843 so this issue is resolved. 203 00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:13,763 And I'd just like to point out that 204 00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:15,729 even though the sweater was uncomfortable, 205 00:11:15,880 --> 00:11:19,726 I didn't use it as an excuse to antagonize everyone around me. 206 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:23,089 You know, you could reimburse the video store owner's next of kin. 207 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:25,647 Or it's resolved! 208 00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,728 Hey, that next of kin thing sounds pretty good. 209 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,243 I believe this is yours. 210 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,165 Can I ask you guys a question? 211 00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:43,891 So, I'm seeing Lucy tomorrow night, and I've never hung out 212 00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:46,122 with someone who broke up with me. How do you do it? 213 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:49,250 You can't let her know you're hurting. The key is confidence. 214 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:51,562 Why is the key always confidence? 215 00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:55,042 How come it's never love handles and flop sweat? 216 00:11:57,600 --> 00:12:00,361 If this girl hurt you so much, are you sure you want to see her again? 217 00:12:00,385 --> 00:12:02,931 Well, if I may, he has so little self-respect 218 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,447 and is so desperate for the smallest crumb of affection, 219 00:12:05,560 --> 00:12:07,920 she could literally sleep with his own father in his own bed 220 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:10,685 and post the video to YouTube, and he'd still buy her flowers 221 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:12,763 and ask her to be his bride. 222 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,047 He's right. 223 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,968 But in my defense, if we could survive that, 224 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:23,645 we could survive anything. 225 00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:28,000 Well, if you're sure you want to do this, it's only coffee. 226 00:12:28,024 --> 00:12:30,186 Just relax and see what happens. 227 00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:32,847 - Well, can I say she looks nice? - Sure. 228 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:34,525 Can I tell her I miss her? 229 00:12:34,680 --> 00:12:36,523 Maybe, if she asks. 230 00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:38,409 Can I show her an oil painting I made of us 231 00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:40,961 surrounded by our children and grandchildren? 232 00:12:43,520 --> 00:12:45,966 I'd save that for the second date. 233 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:48,811 Good, good, 'cause no matter how hard I try, 234 00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:51,406 I cannot get the twins to look alike. 235 00:12:58,040 --> 00:12:59,041 What are you doing? 236 00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:01,885 Oh, I'm just trying to find the stupid next of kin 237 00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:05,203 to this stupid video store owner, so I can return the DVD 238 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:08,011 and see the look on Sheldon's stupid face 239 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:11,243 when he sees that I didn't let this get to me. 240 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:15,241 Sheldon's not here. Why don't you take the sweater off? 241 00:13:15,264 --> 00:13:17,686 - There's a principle at stake! - Which is? 242 00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:20,411 Oh, I don't know. Who cares? Look at me! 243 00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:23,768 Oh, my God! Is that sweater made of bees? 244 00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:26,923 Come on, take it off. I won't tell. 245 00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:29,208 No, no, honey, if I take it off, Sheldon wins. 246 00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:34,161 Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins. 247 00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:37,483 No, it's almost done. 248 00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:41,201 I just... I have to find the next of kin, and send 'em the DVD 249 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,561 and then just wait for someone with my complexion to die 250 00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:45,364 so I can get a skin graft. 251 00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:47,880 Smile. 252 00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:49,840 What is that? What is that for? 253 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:52,970 So you can send it to Princeton and get your money back. 254 00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:00,051 I must say, Sheldon, you're handling this DVD business 255 00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:01,850 with an impressive amount of maturity. 256 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:05,649 I don't know why that surprises you. I'm a grown man. 257 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:07,768 As should be evident by this sport coat 258 00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:10,651 and very real flower in my lapel. 259 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:15,282 Is there some kind of new coping mechanism you're employing? 260 00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:17,966 The more interesting question you should be asking is, 261 00:14:18,120 --> 00:14:20,771 "What does this flower smell like?" 262 00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:23,606 I'm gonna go with sad. 263 00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:27,602 So what's the story with you and this DVD? 264 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,450 There's nothing to tell. 265 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:31,204 Maybe I purchased a book entitled, 266 00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:32,805 Don't Sweat the Small Stuff 267 00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:36,760 and I followed its wise suggestions, one of which was: 268 00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:38,968 Stop and smell the flowers. 269 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,725 - Seriously? - Please. 270 00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:50,805 Haha! 271 00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:01,325 - Hi. - Hello. 272 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,488 - Oh, it's so good to see you. - You, too. 273 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,805 Please, sit. 274 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:09,441 I got you a cappuccino. I remembered it was your favorite. 275 00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:11,482 I also got crumb cake, 276 00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:13,728 but remembered it was my favorite, and I ate it. 277 00:15:15,920 --> 00:15:17,410 Anyway, how are you? 278 00:15:18,360 --> 00:15:19,850 "M pretty good." 279 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,809 Listen, I just wanted to apologize 280 00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:24,122 for breaking up with you in an e-mail. 281 00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:26,400 And I ate all the crumb cake. We both made mistakes. 282 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:28,961 Okay. 283 00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:31,088 I'm so happy you asked me here, 284 00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:33,328 and I hope we can hang out again sometime. 285 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:37,163 You know, as friends, lovemaking partners, whatever. 286 00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:40,445 Oh... 287 00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:42,642 I'm kind of seeing someone. 288 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,245 I think I know the answer to this, 289 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:49,290 but just to be clear, it's not me, right? 290 00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:52,730 This is all your fault! 291 00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:56,081 I should've listened to Mun-Mun because I've been playing 292 00:15:56,104 --> 00:15:58,152 with a cobra and her name is Penny! 293 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:02,171 Why are you so cruel? Do you enjoy my pain? 294 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:04,760 There's a girl at the Cheesecake Factory I can set you up with. 295 00:16:04,784 --> 00:16:06,274 I love you, Penny! 296 00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:12,405 How is it I can conceptualize a methodology 297 00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:14,562 of examining dark matter in the universe 298 00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:17,803 but can't figure out how to fix a novelty squirt flower? 299 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,525 I think the real question is, 300 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:23,650 why do you waste your time with cheap, childish pranks? 301 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,129 There's probably a deep reason, 302 00:16:26,280 --> 00:16:28,328 which I'd be happy to discuss with you 303 00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:30,801 over some peanut brittle in a can. 304 00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:34,282 Okay, Sheldon, I am out of options! 305 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,444 Video store owner, Nursis Manookian, 306 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:38,880 has no next of kin! 307 00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:42,046 Well, you seem hot under the collar... 308 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:43,964 or is that the sweater? 309 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,410 Oh, oh, no, no. It's because I spent all afternoon 310 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:49,847 at the Armenian church where his funeral mass was held. 311 00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,809 According to Father Solakian, 312 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:53,450 no one attended. 313 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:55,329 Luckily, my trip wasn't a complete waste. 314 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,081 I lit a candle and prayed for your death. 315 00:16:57,104 --> 00:16:59,550 But I'm not Armenian, so it probably won't work! 316 00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:03,285 This is over, right? 317 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:05,169 Oh, not necessarily. 318 00:17:06,120 --> 00:17:09,329 I suggest you look for long-lost relatives 319 00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:12,131 either in Armenia or Lebanon. 320 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:15,810 Listen to me, Sheldon. 321 00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,849 I am not going to Lebanon 322 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:21,641 to return Super Mario Bros. The movie! 323 00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:26,762 Anyway, it might be fun. You love hummus. 324 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,523 Why isn't this bothering you? 325 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,682 Isn't your brain getting itchy? 326 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:35,127 This is on your card. 327 00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:37,402 This could be ruining your credit score! 328 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,484 Why isn't this making you crazy? 329 00:17:42,360 --> 00:17:43,566 Leonard... 330 00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:47,322 I have something to tell you, 331 00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:50,324 but I want you to promise not to flip out. 332 00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:51,641 What? 333 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,085 Seven years ago, 334 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:58,164 I found out the DVD was late and I paid for it. 335 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:07,961 What? 336 00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:11,010 I was going to mention it at the time, 337 00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:13,527 but then I thought, some day, 338 00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:17,291 this might be a teachable moment. 339 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:33,167 Ahh! 340 00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:43,530 But I...?! You...?! How...?! 341 00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:45,051 What?! 342 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:53,124 Sheldon, that was diabolical. 343 00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:55,327 I know. 344 00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:58,285 And it wasn't easy. 345 00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:02,081 Do you have any idea what it's like to wait for years, 346 00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:04,891 and never know if you're going to finally get satisfaction? 347 00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:13,320 Wow. 348 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:15,164 You're even prettier than Penny said. 349 00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:18,085 I can't believe a girl like you doesn't have a boyfriend. 350 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:19,287 Well, I don't. 351 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:21,568 I don't believe you. You're lying to me! 352 00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:24,085 What? 353 00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,641 It's okay. I have no morals, and I'm desperately lonely. 354 00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:29,240 I'll be the other man if you want a little something-something 355 00:19:29,264 --> 00:19:30,644 on the side. 356 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:36,807 What is wrong with you?!