1 00:00:03,963 --> 00:00:05,840 What a wonderful day! Thank you! 2 00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:07,425 Oh, we're glad you had fun. 3 00:00:07,634 --> 00:00:10,095 Blue Icees and a trip to The Container Store? 4 00:00:10,303 --> 00:00:13,765 It's like I died and went to the post-mortem, neuron-induced hallucination 5 00:00:13,932 --> 00:00:15,600 commonly mistaken as Heaven. 6 00:00:17,185 --> 00:00:19,229 I still don't understand why you bought that pill caddie. 7 00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:20,605 You're a young man. 8 00:00:20,855 --> 00:00:22,565 Age is a state of mind, Leonard. 9 00:00:22,774 --> 00:00:24,484 In here, I'm 90. 10 00:00:25,819 --> 00:00:27,320 - (KEYS JANGLING) - (DOOR UNLOCKING) 11 00:00:28,071 --> 00:00:30,073 Why are you taking your bins over there? 12 00:00:30,323 --> 00:00:31,950 Uh, that's just where I need them. 13 00:00:32,117 --> 00:00:33,576 You know, she doesn't have a lot of closet space. 14 00:00:34,369 --> 00:00:35,578 Mmm, what's wrong with your closet? 15 00:00:36,621 --> 00:00:37,622 Uh... 16 00:00:37,914 --> 00:00:40,542 Well, honey, you know, now that Leonard and I are married, 17 00:00:40,750 --> 00:00:43,002 it kind of makes sense that we actually live together. 18 00:00:43,962 --> 00:00:45,463 So, that's all this day was? 19 00:00:45,672 --> 00:00:47,966 A plan to butter me up before delivering bad news? 20 00:00:48,174 --> 00:00:50,427 - Come on, buddy. - No, I thought we were friends. 21 00:00:50,635 --> 00:00:52,470 You asked for a sip of my Icee. 22 00:00:52,679 --> 00:00:55,223 If you'd had your own straw, I might have said yes. 23 00:00:56,808 --> 00:00:58,810 Sheldon, please, we already feel bad about this. 24 00:00:58,977 --> 00:01:00,979 Yeah, you know what they don't sell at The Container Store? 25 00:01:01,146 --> 00:01:03,773 Something large enough to contain my disappointment! 26 00:01:06,234 --> 00:01:08,570 Although, if anyone did, it would be them! 27 00:01:09,904 --> 00:01:11,948 (THEME SONG PLAYING) 28 00:01:36,097 --> 00:01:38,183 Thank you for letting me come speak with you. 29 00:01:38,516 --> 00:01:39,517 Of course. 30 00:01:39,768 --> 00:01:43,188 As my relationships with Penny and Amy are currently strained, 31 00:01:43,354 --> 00:01:46,232 I'm turning to you for female comfort and encouragement. 32 00:01:46,733 --> 00:01:47,734 Aww. 33 00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:49,027 I'm honored. 34 00:01:49,194 --> 00:01:51,696 I tried reaching out to my mother, but she was in Bible study. 35 00:01:51,863 --> 00:01:54,866 Leonard's mother is on a book tour, my Meemaw was taking a nap, 36 00:01:55,033 --> 00:01:58,119 and after a while, Siri started repeating her answers. 37 00:01:59,788 --> 00:02:01,414 So I'm your seventh choice. 38 00:02:01,706 --> 00:02:04,000 Yeah, I know. Top 10, pretty exciting. 39 00:02:05,293 --> 00:02:06,503 How can I help you? 40 00:02:07,545 --> 00:02:11,216 In addition to Amy leaving me, Leonard's moving in with Penny. 41 00:02:11,382 --> 00:02:14,177 It's difficult not to feel abandoned. 42 00:02:15,678 --> 00:02:17,889 Well, why don't you look at this as an opportunity? 43 00:02:18,056 --> 00:02:19,599 You had other roommates before Leonard. 44 00:02:19,766 --> 00:02:22,393 Maybe this is a chance to find someone new. 45 00:02:22,977 --> 00:02:25,104 Hmm, perhaps I could find someone better than Leonard. 46 00:02:25,396 --> 00:02:27,232 You know, someone I could rub in his face. 47 00:02:27,524 --> 00:02:29,901 Chris Pratt's all the rage right now. 48 00:02:31,027 --> 00:02:33,780 I wonder how he'd feel about taking the smaller bedroom. 49 00:02:34,906 --> 00:02:36,407 - Hey. - Hey. 50 00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:40,286 You know who'd be the perfect roommate? 51 00:02:41,287 --> 00:02:43,331 Gandalf, but he's a smoker. 52 00:02:45,375 --> 00:02:47,627 Stuart! He's been living with us for a while now. 53 00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:49,420 I'm sure he'd love to get us out of his hair. 54 00:02:49,671 --> 00:02:51,714 Nope, couldn't be happier. 55 00:02:52,465 --> 00:02:54,926 - Well, Sheldon's looking for a roommate-- - Nope. 56 00:02:57,095 --> 00:02:58,763 - He'll think about it. - STUART: No, I won't! 57 00:02:58,930 --> 00:02:59,931 (DOOR CLOSES) 58 00:03:01,850 --> 00:03:02,934 Have you seen this Archie comic? 59 00:03:03,142 --> 00:03:05,520 It's actually Archie versus Predator. 60 00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:08,565 How could Archie defeat Predator? 61 00:03:09,274 --> 00:03:11,818 I don't know, maybe Jughead's a Terminator. 62 00:03:13,736 --> 00:03:15,780 - Hey. - Hey, Stuart. 63 00:03:16,739 --> 00:03:19,117 - Do you guys know any musicians? - Why? 64 00:03:19,659 --> 00:03:23,162 I was thinking it might be cool to have live music here a few nights a week. 65 00:03:23,454 --> 00:03:26,499 You know, give this place more of a "staying in business" vibe. 66 00:03:27,792 --> 00:03:29,294 What kind of music are you thinking of? 67 00:03:29,586 --> 00:03:33,548 I like all kinds of music, but my favorite genre is free. 68 00:03:35,300 --> 00:03:37,468 Hey, we've always talked about playing together. 69 00:03:37,802 --> 00:03:39,846 Well, it could be fun to try a little acoustic thing. 70 00:03:40,263 --> 00:03:41,681 Oh, we could play filk music! 71 00:03:42,265 --> 00:03:43,308 What's that? 72 00:03:43,558 --> 00:03:44,809 It's been around for years. 73 00:03:45,018 --> 00:03:48,396 It's like folk music, but with a sci-fi/fantasy theme. 74 00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:49,647 I like it. 75 00:03:49,814 --> 00:03:53,026 It sounds exactly like something I shouldn't be expected to pay for. 76 00:03:54,193 --> 00:03:57,155 Hey, dude, if we do this, we're gonna need a cool band name. 77 00:03:57,780 --> 00:04:01,576 You know, I've actually (CHUCKLES) had one I've been sitting on for years. 78 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:03,870 - Really? - It was for this power trio 79 00:04:04,078 --> 00:04:07,582 I tried to put together in junior high, but I was short two friends. 80 00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:10,126 What is it? 81 00:04:11,002 --> 00:04:13,004 Footprints on the Moon. 82 00:04:15,673 --> 00:04:17,842 I just got chills. 83 00:04:18,509 --> 00:04:19,677 So did I. 84 00:04:19,969 --> 00:04:21,054 Me, too. 85 00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:23,514 But I might have Lyme disease. 86 00:04:27,101 --> 00:04:29,354 Just a few more signatures and we'll be finished. 87 00:04:29,562 --> 00:04:33,066 Uh, initial here to acknowledge that you've returned your key. 88 00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:37,195 Okay. 89 00:04:38,029 --> 00:04:41,658 Oh, yes, as my future neighbor, I'd like you to have a key. 90 00:04:45,161 --> 00:04:47,872 Initial here to acknowledge you received it. 91 00:04:49,165 --> 00:04:51,042 I'm proud of you. You're taking this really well. 92 00:04:51,250 --> 00:04:53,169 Oh, it's not like I'm never going to see you two again. 93 00:04:53,586 --> 00:04:56,381 Yeah, which brings us to article 23, subsection C. 94 00:04:56,631 --> 00:05:00,802 "Please check here to reserve your spot at the 10-year roommate reunion." 95 00:05:02,929 --> 00:05:04,389 Do I really have to do that now? 96 00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:06,724 No, but if you want chicken and get stuck with the fish, 97 00:05:06,933 --> 00:05:08,059 that's on you. 98 00:05:09,852 --> 00:05:10,895 All right. 99 00:05:11,062 --> 00:05:12,563 Oh, and lastly, 100 00:05:12,730 --> 00:05:15,984 please initial here to confirm that ownership of the living room couch 101 00:05:16,192 --> 00:05:19,237 is hereby transferred to me in perpetuity all throughout the universe. 102 00:05:19,487 --> 00:05:21,072 And all alternate universes. 103 00:05:21,406 --> 00:05:23,491 Except for those universes where owning a couch 104 00:05:23,700 --> 00:05:25,034 is forbidden by the hive queen. 105 00:05:25,243 --> 00:05:26,953 In which case, all glory to the hive queen. 106 00:05:30,081 --> 00:05:34,711 All right, so all that's left is for us to sign and date the document, 107 00:05:34,961 --> 00:05:38,214 and we will officially no longer be roommates. 108 00:05:41,634 --> 00:05:42,719 What's the matter? 109 00:05:42,927 --> 00:05:43,928 (SIGHS) 110 00:05:44,178 --> 00:05:45,680 It's harder than I thought. 111 00:05:46,014 --> 00:05:48,433 - Let me help you. L-E-O-N-A-- - That helped! 112 00:05:51,602 --> 00:05:53,896 So, I have an idea for a filk song. 113 00:05:54,063 --> 00:05:56,315 It's kind of a power ballad, 114 00:05:56,524 --> 00:05:59,402 superhero crossover tale of epic proportions. 115 00:06:00,987 --> 00:06:04,741 - Is it cold in here? 'Cause... Oh, my! - (BOTH GIGGLE) 116 00:06:05,783 --> 00:06:09,662 Okay, so it's a David and Goliath story. 117 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:12,248 It's about man against God. 118 00:06:12,457 --> 00:06:14,751 It's called Hammer and Whip: 119 00:06:15,376 --> 00:06:19,839 The Untold Story of Thor versus Indiana Jones. 120 00:06:22,300 --> 00:06:24,510 Thor versus Indiana Jones. 121 00:06:24,802 --> 00:06:26,804 - You just blew my filking mind. - (CHUCKLES) 122 00:06:27,972 --> 00:06:31,476 Okay, I don't have it all worked out yet, but I was thinking something like, um... 123 00:06:32,602 --> 00:06:34,479 (SINGING) Oh, Indy 124 00:06:34,854 --> 00:06:36,606 Oh, Indy 125 00:06:36,814 --> 00:06:40,526 The skies are so windy 126 00:06:42,904 --> 00:06:46,365 Is that a flying man with a killer bod? 127 00:06:46,699 --> 00:06:50,495 Wait! That's no man, it's a Norse god 128 00:06:52,997 --> 00:06:55,958 - Oh, yes, definitely. Okay, wait. Hang on. - Yeah. 129 00:06:56,334 --> 00:06:57,335 (HUMMING) 130 00:06:57,585 --> 00:07:03,758 (SINGING) Thunder clapped as Thor raised his mighty hammer 131 00:07:05,009 --> 00:07:10,515 Indy rapped, "That's one bad mamma-jamma" 132 00:07:12,141 --> 00:07:13,893 - That is so good! - Right? 133 00:07:14,102 --> 00:07:16,104 "Mamma-jamma" just came to me! (CHUCKLES) 134 00:07:17,355 --> 00:07:19,190 Okay, and here's the hook. Uh... 135 00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:22,026 (SINGING) Thor and Doctor Jones 136 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:24,779 Thor and Doctor Jones 137 00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:29,617 One plays with lightning The other plays with bones 138 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,871 BOTH: (SINGING) Thor and Doctor Jones 139 00:07:34,038 --> 00:07:36,749 Thor and Doctor Jones 140 00:07:36,999 --> 00:07:41,712 One plays with lightning The other plays with bones 141 00:07:43,047 --> 00:07:44,048 Oh... 142 00:07:44,549 --> 00:07:45,883 Oh, man, that rocks! 143 00:07:46,092 --> 00:07:48,177 - Hey, remember the Ark of the Covenant? - Yeah? 144 00:07:48,386 --> 00:07:51,013 That's how much we're gonna melt people's faces off. 145 00:07:54,058 --> 00:07:56,394 I appreciate your interest in the apartment. 146 00:07:56,561 --> 00:07:58,813 I just need to ask you a few standard questions. 147 00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:01,566 - Sure. - It says here you're a chemist. 148 00:08:01,858 --> 00:08:06,904 Which element on the periodic table do you feel is too big for its britches? 149 00:08:09,448 --> 00:08:11,075 Is that supposed to be a joke? 150 00:08:12,201 --> 00:08:15,413 Looks like argon's not the only one with an attitude problem. 151 00:08:17,165 --> 00:08:21,586 In general, would you say that you smell better, worse, or the same 152 00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:23,254 as you do right now? 153 00:08:26,174 --> 00:08:28,593 I was going to ask you what is the best fruit, 154 00:08:28,801 --> 00:08:30,887 but then I realized what I wanna ask you is 155 00:08:31,095 --> 00:08:32,763 why is there a Band-Aid on your forearm, 156 00:08:32,930 --> 00:08:34,932 but then I realized what I really wanna ask you is, 157 00:08:35,141 --> 00:08:36,934 can you just go? 158 00:08:39,604 --> 00:08:42,315 You're healthy, you have a job in the sciences. 159 00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,692 I've got to say, if this credit report comes back good, 160 00:08:44,901 --> 00:08:46,110 you're the front-runner. 161 00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:52,909 I'm not gonna be your roommate, Sheldon. 162 00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:56,954 (SCOFFS) But I met with 11 people and they all walked out. 163 00:08:57,163 --> 00:09:00,374 And that Hollywood phony Chris Pratt never tweeted me back. 164 00:09:01,667 --> 00:09:03,461 I'm sure you'll find somebody else. 165 00:09:03,836 --> 00:09:04,837 I suppose. 166 00:09:05,338 --> 00:09:06,631 What happened to me, Amy? 167 00:09:07,048 --> 00:09:10,301 Years ago, I was completely disengaged from my feelings. 168 00:09:10,593 --> 00:09:13,554 I'd say it was a happier time, but I was disengaged from my feelings, 169 00:09:13,763 --> 00:09:15,139 so who can tell? 170 00:09:16,933 --> 00:09:20,102 I don't know how to help you. You know, feelings are a part of life. 171 00:09:20,561 --> 00:09:21,812 Well, they didn't used to be. 172 00:09:22,104 --> 00:09:25,775 You and Leonard and Penny, you all poisoned me with emotions. 173 00:09:26,025 --> 00:09:30,571 I was like the Tin Man, perfectly content, until that evil wizard gave him a heart. 174 00:09:32,657 --> 00:09:34,867 I don't think that was the point of the movie. 175 00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:36,619 Fine, then I was like Pinocchio 176 00:09:36,953 --> 00:09:39,830 before that jerk Geppetto went and made him a real boy. 177 00:09:41,582 --> 00:09:43,000 There you go. 178 00:09:45,378 --> 00:09:47,755 - So, what are you thinking for dinner? - Well, it's Thai food night. 179 00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,007 Oh, honey, you don't live with Sheldon anymore. 180 00:09:50,174 --> 00:09:51,676 You can have anything you want. 181 00:09:52,343 --> 00:09:53,844 (CHUCKLES) You're right. 182 00:09:54,303 --> 00:09:55,346 But what? 183 00:09:56,472 --> 00:09:57,473 Mexican? 184 00:09:57,682 --> 00:09:59,016 Italian? German? 185 00:09:59,308 --> 00:10:00,393 Indian? Greek? 186 00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:04,438 Cuban? Chinese? Pizza? Barbecue? Korean? Korean barbecue? 187 00:10:06,732 --> 00:10:08,025 - How about Thai food? - Oh, thank God. 188 00:10:12,863 --> 00:10:14,448 Hey, we're going to dinner. You wanna come? 189 00:10:14,865 --> 00:10:16,284 Oh, I wish I could. 190 00:10:16,492 --> 00:10:19,370 But I realized I've become too emotionally vulnerable. 191 00:10:19,537 --> 00:10:21,372 So like an operating system, 192 00:10:21,664 --> 00:10:24,417 I'm restoring my life to the last stable version, 193 00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:27,336 which was in 2003, the day before I met Leonard. 194 00:10:29,922 --> 00:10:31,882 - You heard him, no. - Hang on. 195 00:10:32,341 --> 00:10:34,635 Wait, you actually think it's 2003? 196 00:10:34,885 --> 00:10:37,596 No, just because I'm living my life like it was 12 years ago, 197 00:10:37,847 --> 00:10:39,098 doesn't mean I'm delusional. 198 00:10:39,557 --> 00:10:42,476 And, since it is 2003, I don't know who you are, 199 00:10:42,810 --> 00:10:44,562 so please exit the premises 200 00:10:44,770 --> 00:10:46,897 before I call the police on my stylish, new flip phone. 201 00:10:59,577 --> 00:11:00,578 Are you doing okay? 202 00:11:01,579 --> 00:11:04,206 I guess. Just, you know, worried about Sheldon. 203 00:11:04,999 --> 00:11:06,584 Well, come on. He's a grown man in his 30s 204 00:11:06,792 --> 00:11:08,878 pretending to be a grown man in his 20s. He's fine. 205 00:11:10,713 --> 00:11:12,089 I hope so. 206 00:11:12,340 --> 00:11:14,175 What else can you do? Move back in with him? 207 00:11:14,383 --> 00:11:16,093 No, of course not, I just feel bad. 208 00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,678 Well, so do I. 209 00:11:17,887 --> 00:11:19,180 But don't you want to live with your wife 210 00:11:19,972 --> 00:11:22,266 and set the thermostat to whatever you want? 211 00:11:22,475 --> 00:11:24,935 And have your body tell you when it's time to go to the bathroom? 212 00:11:25,186 --> 00:11:28,689 You know, not a schedule slipped underneath your door every morning. 213 00:11:29,648 --> 00:11:31,650 I did like that he had the weather on it. 214 00:11:33,778 --> 00:11:35,321 Trust me, this is the right thing. 215 00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:38,324 No, I know. And it's not like we're abandoning him. 216 00:11:39,283 --> 00:11:41,911 Plus, we can FaceTime him whenever we want. 217 00:11:42,661 --> 00:11:46,165 You know, once iPhones are invented in his universe. (CHUCKLES) 218 00:11:49,377 --> 00:11:50,378 (MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY) 219 00:11:50,586 --> 00:11:53,005 I can't believe Sheldon asked you to be his roommate. 220 00:11:53,339 --> 00:11:55,633 I can't believe he ran my credit. 221 00:11:57,802 --> 00:11:59,678 Hey, if you're open to living with someone great, 222 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:01,931 I'll give you $1,000 to take Stuart. 223 00:12:03,808 --> 00:12:05,935 You really should've gone on the Internet and checked how long 224 00:12:06,102 --> 00:12:08,104 that kind of thing lives before you got one. 225 00:12:09,814 --> 00:12:13,901 I'm sorry, I just thought you might have a pasty, weirdo-shaped hole in your life. 226 00:12:14,485 --> 00:12:19,031 Hey, I know Sheldon's quirky, but he's also brilliant and insightful. 227 00:12:19,657 --> 00:12:22,076 I think calling him a weirdo is a little unfair. 228 00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:24,578 Hello, 2003! 229 00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:29,417 Hey, we brought you Thai... 230 00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:32,962 Where is everything? 231 00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:35,047 In my present, it's in the future. 232 00:12:35,256 --> 00:12:37,675 In your present, it's been crammed in the bedroom 233 00:12:37,842 --> 00:12:40,845 by an enterprising, young man I met in The Home Depot parking lot. 234 00:12:43,222 --> 00:12:44,348 I know what you're doing. 235 00:12:44,557 --> 00:12:46,225 You're trying to get attention so we'll feel bad for you, 236 00:12:46,434 --> 00:12:47,518 but it's not happening. 237 00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:50,771 No, what I'm doing is trying to figure out how to live my life, 238 00:12:51,021 --> 00:12:52,314 now that everyone is leaving me. 239 00:12:52,523 --> 00:12:54,775 Knock it off! We're across the hall. 240 00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:57,695 As the kids are saying today, "Talk to the hand." 241 00:12:59,447 --> 00:13:01,031 They're not saying that. 242 00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:03,909 They are in 2003. 243 00:13:04,660 --> 00:13:06,203 No, no, they're really not. 244 00:13:09,623 --> 00:13:12,209 (SINGING) Thor and Doctor Jones 245 00:13:12,460 --> 00:13:14,879 Thor and Doctor Jones 246 00:13:15,254 --> 00:13:16,505 One runs from Loki 247 00:13:16,714 --> 00:13:19,675 The other runs from stones 248 00:13:21,385 --> 00:13:22,720 So, what do you think? 249 00:13:23,387 --> 00:13:24,847 - Wow! - Yeah. 250 00:13:25,473 --> 00:13:28,225 "Runs from stones" means that big boulder, 251 00:13:28,392 --> 00:13:30,436 but I just couldn't rhyme anything with "boulder." 252 00:13:31,395 --> 00:13:34,190 Colder, shoulder, soldier, folder-- 253 00:13:34,398 --> 00:13:35,733 Right. Yeah, right. 254 00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:38,986 But what do you think? 255 00:13:39,361 --> 00:13:41,030 I think it's very cute. 256 00:13:41,322 --> 00:13:43,240 Cute? It's not cute. 257 00:13:43,532 --> 00:13:46,327 Cute is children dressed as vegetables. 258 00:13:47,953 --> 00:13:50,039 Okay, fine, it's not cute. 259 00:13:50,539 --> 00:13:51,874 (SCOFFS) Just be honest, you don't like it. 260 00:13:52,082 --> 00:13:55,586 I didn't say that. I just like music you can dance to. 261 00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:57,463 You can dance to this! 262 00:13:58,380 --> 00:13:59,381 Uh... Uh... 263 00:13:59,798 --> 00:14:02,259 (SINGING) Thor and Doctor Jones 264 00:14:02,510 --> 00:14:04,512 Thor and Doctor Jones 265 00:14:04,762 --> 00:14:09,266 One plays with lightning The other plays with bones 266 00:14:10,976 --> 00:14:12,895 I'm telling you, dude, the song has no groove. 267 00:14:13,103 --> 00:14:14,730 You can't dance to it. 268 00:14:15,898 --> 00:14:17,608 Who cares? I thought the whole point 269 00:14:17,775 --> 00:14:21,111 of Footprints on the Moon was to write songs that make people think. 270 00:14:21,529 --> 00:14:24,949 You can do both. Like Michael Jackson's Billie Jean? 271 00:14:25,241 --> 00:14:28,953 While you're dancing you're thinking, like, "Darn it, whose baby is it?" 272 00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:35,292 Where's this coming from? A few hours ago, we both loved this song. 273 00:14:35,459 --> 00:14:38,504 I still love it. I just think there's room for improvement. 274 00:14:39,964 --> 00:14:41,507 You played it for Emily, didn't you? 275 00:14:41,715 --> 00:14:43,801 - Yeah, so what? - You are such a wimp! 276 00:14:44,093 --> 00:14:45,719 I mean, she didn't like it, now you don't like it. 277 00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:50,516 No, no. I'm just evolving as a musician. You're the one who's stuck in the past. 278 00:14:52,101 --> 00:14:54,353 "The past" was lunch! 279 00:14:56,313 --> 00:14:57,648 You know what's really happening here? 280 00:14:58,649 --> 00:15:00,985 Your girlfriend is breaking up our band. 281 00:15:02,027 --> 00:15:04,488 Wait, she has nothing to do with this. I am my own man. 282 00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:08,158 Oh, please! Your brain belongs to whoever's willing to sleep with you. 283 00:15:08,492 --> 00:15:09,618 That is so not true! 284 00:15:09,827 --> 00:15:13,330 Really? Remember when you were gonna get circumcised for Rachel Bernstein? 285 00:15:14,290 --> 00:15:16,208 That had nothing to do with Rachel. 286 00:15:16,417 --> 00:15:19,169 It was an overreaction to a bad zipper injury. 287 00:15:21,797 --> 00:15:23,632 I don't need this. 288 00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:26,427 - I'm quitting the band! - Fine, I quit, too! 289 00:15:26,635 --> 00:15:29,680 - Then get out of my house! - With pleasure! 290 00:15:32,516 --> 00:15:33,934 (DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES) 291 00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:39,189 Raj, wait! 292 00:15:39,356 --> 00:15:41,191 What took you so long? 293 00:15:44,194 --> 00:15:47,698 Buddy, I know me moving in with Penny feels like a big change, but it's not. 294 00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:52,202 How can you say that? Amy's gone, and you two are married now, 295 00:15:52,369 --> 00:15:54,622 so it's only a matter of time before you're gone, too. 296 00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:56,290 Okay, you don't know what's gonna happen. 297 00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:59,084 No, I do. Eventually, you'll want more space, 298 00:15:59,293 --> 00:16:00,628 and you'll move into a house. 299 00:16:00,836 --> 00:16:02,671 And then instead of dinner a couple of times a week, 300 00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:04,214 it'll only be a couple of times a month. 301 00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:06,800 And then it'll only be on special occasions, 302 00:16:07,051 --> 00:16:09,762 like when Bernadette divorces Wolowitz, you know? 303 00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:14,558 Or like when Koothrappali's weird girlfriend admits 304 00:16:14,725 --> 00:16:16,560 where she buried his body, you know? 305 00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:22,024 Or Amy's wedding, where she's marrying someone better than me. 306 00:16:23,484 --> 00:16:26,904 Okay, look, we don't need to rush into anything. 307 00:16:27,279 --> 00:16:28,280 All right? 308 00:16:29,073 --> 00:16:31,659 Maybe instead of Leonard moving in with me, we just 309 00:16:32,451 --> 00:16:33,744 leave things the way they are. 310 00:16:34,370 --> 00:16:38,916 And sometimes we'll sleep over there, and sometimes we'll sleep over here. 311 00:16:39,833 --> 00:16:41,210 But mostly here. 312 00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:44,046 Sure. 313 00:16:44,254 --> 00:16:46,090 What about what you said in the restaurant? 314 00:16:46,423 --> 00:16:48,175 Well, it's not forever. It's just for a little while. 315 00:16:48,384 --> 00:16:51,136 If you want, we could think of him like he's our dog. 316 00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:54,181 You can, you know. 317 00:16:55,224 --> 00:16:56,725 I'm happy when you come home, 318 00:16:58,018 --> 00:17:00,020 and I'm scared of fireworks. 319 00:17:00,896 --> 00:17:03,440 By the way, on July fourth, we're all sleeping here. 320 00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:06,985 - Fine. - All right, great! 321 00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:08,237 Just give me one minute, 322 00:17:08,445 --> 00:17:10,489 and I'll get started on a new roommate agreement. 323 00:17:11,031 --> 00:17:12,616 Yeah, nothing from Pratt, we're good. 324 00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,584 - (BOTH PLAYING MUSIC) - (SINGING) Indy's whip snapped 325 00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:24,962 Thor's hammer missed 326 00:17:25,963 --> 00:17:30,801 It was Avenger versus archeologist 327 00:17:31,677 --> 00:17:37,099 Indy held his ground and straightened his fedora 328 00:17:37,641 --> 00:17:42,604 Thor said, "That's a nice look in 1944" 329 00:17:46,316 --> 00:17:48,819 BOTH: (SINGING) Thor and Doctor Jones 330 00:17:49,027 --> 00:17:51,572 Thor and Doctor Jones 331 00:17:51,947 --> 00:17:56,326 One plays with lightning The other plays with bones 332 00:17:57,953 --> 00:17:59,329 Thor and Doctor Jones 333 00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:03,041 - Thor and Doctor Jones! - Thor and Doctor Jones 334 00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:09,131 One plays with lightning The other plays with bones 335 00:18:10,424 --> 00:18:12,217 Play something we can dance to! 336 00:18:42,539 --> 00:18:43,540 English - SDH