1
00:00:02,170 --> 00:00:03,588
PENNY: Previously on
The Big Bang Theory...
2
00:00:03,963 --> 00:00:05,632
Well, there's no point dwelling on it.
3
00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:07,384
As the Vulcans say...
4
00:00:07,592 --> 00:00:09,427
(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)
5
00:00:11,763 --> 00:00:14,182
- Do you know what that means?
- No.
6
00:00:14,432 --> 00:00:15,767
You telling the truth?
7
00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:17,394
(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)
8
00:00:18,937 --> 00:00:19,979
Well, this is ridiculous.
9
00:00:20,271 --> 00:00:23,191
Being upset about Amy all the time
isn't accomplishing anything.
10
00:00:23,441 --> 00:00:26,069
If I wanna resolve this situation,
then I need to take action.
11
00:00:26,528 --> 00:00:27,529
What are you gonna do?
12
00:00:27,779 --> 00:00:29,948
I'm going to find her
and ask her to marry me.
13
00:00:30,115 --> 00:00:33,576
And if she says yes, we can put this
behind us and resume our relationship.
14
00:00:33,785 --> 00:00:37,747
If she says no, well, then she can just...
(SPEAKS OTHER LANGUAGE)
15
00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:43,128
He didn't mean that.
16
00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:50,468
(INAUDIBLE)
17
00:01:07,402 --> 00:01:10,071
I think it's so adorable
you're making Sheldon breakfast.
18
00:01:10,321 --> 00:01:11,823
Well, he's having a rough time.
19
00:01:12,073 --> 00:01:13,158
Amy broke his heart,
20
00:01:13,491 --> 00:01:16,244
the DVR cut off the last minute
of Doctor Who.
21
00:01:17,036 --> 00:01:18,913
That crow followed him home.
22
00:01:20,915 --> 00:01:23,626
Aren't you worried you're making
French toast on oatmeal day?
23
00:01:23,918 --> 00:01:26,463
Oh? Well, what's this? A pot of oatmeal?
24
00:01:26,713 --> 00:01:30,175
Or thanks to you, what I will
now call "gloatmeal"? (CHUCKLES)
25
00:01:31,050 --> 00:01:33,052
Oh, I don't want credit for that.
26
00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:37,932
Dr. and Mrs. Hofstadter,
lovely to see you this fine morning.
27
00:01:38,349 --> 00:01:40,351
- You're in a good mood.
- I am indeed.
28
00:01:40,769 --> 00:01:44,147
I have decided, instead of
wallowing in sadness about Amy,
29
00:01:44,481 --> 00:01:47,025
it is time that I find myself
a new female companion.
30
00:01:47,734 --> 00:01:49,861
- Ah, good for you.
- What brought this on?
31
00:01:50,278 --> 00:01:52,530
I realized something.
When Amy was in my life,
32
00:01:52,864 --> 00:01:55,700
I was hyper-focused on my work
and ignored her.
33
00:01:55,992 --> 00:01:58,203
And you don't want to make the same
mistake with the next woman?
34
00:01:58,703 --> 00:02:00,622
No, I need a new woman
in my life to ignore,
35
00:02:00,872 --> 00:02:02,874
so I can hyper-focus on my work again.
36
00:02:03,792 --> 00:02:05,168
Hey, I made French toast sticks.
37
00:02:05,543 --> 00:02:08,463
- On oatmeal day?
- Ah, I also made oatmeal.
38
00:02:08,922 --> 00:02:12,258
Oh, that's a lot of carbohydrates
for a man on the prowl.
39
00:02:12,592 --> 00:02:14,344
You know what? You eat it, you're married.
40
00:02:14,552 --> 00:02:16,346
It doesn't matter what you look like.
41
00:02:18,097 --> 00:02:21,434
Don't take advice from a man
who threw his shoe at a crow.
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00:02:23,394 --> 00:02:24,938
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
43
00:02:49,420 --> 00:02:51,756
- Thank you for coming by, gentlemen.
- No problem.
44
00:02:51,923 --> 00:02:53,341
So, what's up?
45
00:02:53,550 --> 00:02:56,302
It was the two of you
who found Amy Farrah Fowler for me.
46
00:02:56,553 --> 00:02:58,513
Now that I'm looking
for my next girlfriend,
47
00:02:58,763 --> 00:03:01,766
it seemed only logical
that I employ your services once again.
48
00:03:02,267 --> 00:03:04,644
You sure you're up for that?
She did hurt you.
49
00:03:04,936 --> 00:03:09,065
Oh, no, it's all right. I think of my time
with Amy as a stick of Fruit Stripe gum.
50
00:03:09,357 --> 00:03:14,112
Sweet and enjoyable at first, but
ultimately a flavorless lump of sadness.
51
00:03:16,239 --> 00:03:20,118
You're not wrong about Fruit Stripe.
I was always a Hubba Bubba man.
52
00:03:21,786 --> 00:03:24,247
Hubba Bubba over Dubble Bubble?
You're crazy.
53
00:03:25,081 --> 00:03:26,791
Hey, the jaw wants what it wants.
54
00:03:27,125 --> 00:03:28,459
Gentlemen!
55
00:03:29,127 --> 00:03:30,795
Oh, right. Uh, girlfriend.
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00:03:31,254 --> 00:03:32,672
(STAMMERS) What are you looking for?
57
00:03:33,006 --> 00:03:37,051
All I'm looking for is an educated,
intelligent woman who shares my interests,
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while retaining
her own unique point of view.
59
00:03:39,429 --> 00:03:42,181
She should be kind, patient,
and most important,
60
00:03:42,515 --> 00:03:45,810
unable to imagine life without me
by 10 o'clock tonight.
61
00:03:46,561 --> 00:03:48,229
Isn't that a little unreasonable?
62
00:03:48,897 --> 00:03:52,775
Ah, fine. She doesn't need her own
point of view. Now, chop chop.
63
00:03:54,527 --> 00:03:56,696
Come on, Amy! Show us the dress!
64
00:03:57,155 --> 00:04:00,533
AMY: Okay, but I'm really stepping outside
of my comfort zone here.
65
00:04:08,124 --> 00:04:09,125
Uh...
66
00:04:09,626 --> 00:04:12,170
I don't think any of your comfort zones
are showing.
67
00:04:13,922 --> 00:04:15,924
It's your third date,
maybe you could go more sexy.
68
00:04:16,299 --> 00:04:19,260
Well, some people think
the sexiest organ is the brain.
69
00:04:20,219 --> 00:04:21,471
No one ever bought me drinks at a bar
70
00:04:21,679 --> 00:04:23,681
because my brain just
popped out of my shirt.
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00:04:25,308 --> 00:04:28,061
Do you have any heels higher than this?
He's pretty tall.
72
00:04:28,728 --> 00:04:31,856
Ooh, tall! Finally some details
about this mystery man.
73
00:04:32,023 --> 00:04:33,316
Yeah, come on. Tell us more.
74
00:04:33,691 --> 00:04:36,986
Well, I told you his name and that
he's tall. What more do you need?
75
00:04:37,487 --> 00:04:40,698
- Did you kiss him yet?
- Just a little peck on the lips.
76
00:04:40,865 --> 00:04:41,866
(BOTH SQUEAL)
77
00:04:44,619 --> 00:04:45,870
Well, we're your best friends.
78
00:04:46,079 --> 00:04:48,289
Give us one more detail
and we promise we'll leave you alone.
79
00:04:48,706 --> 00:04:51,834
Fine. Um, he's British.
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(BOTH SQUEAL)
81
00:04:54,671 --> 00:04:57,298
(CHUCKLING)
All right, that is a juicy one!
82
00:04:57,799 --> 00:05:00,134
All right, where's
Tall British Dave taking you?
83
00:05:00,468 --> 00:05:01,719
Tea and basketball?
84
00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:05,807
- To that new Italian place on Walnut.
- Oh, nice.
85
00:05:06,140 --> 00:05:07,892
- I'm gonna go look for other shoes.
- Oh, good luck.
86
00:05:08,393 --> 00:05:11,020
I threw out all my tall ones
when I married Leonard.
87
00:05:13,481 --> 00:05:16,109
Hey, you wanna swing by that place
tonight and get a look at this guy?
88
00:05:16,943 --> 00:05:18,569
We don't even know what time
they're gonna be there.
89
00:05:18,903 --> 00:05:21,489
I'll just call the restaurant, pretend
I'm Amy and check the reservation.
90
00:05:21,906 --> 00:05:23,741
Damn, you're sneaky.
91
00:05:24,450 --> 00:05:26,035
Yeah, but I'm little, so it's adorable.
92
00:05:29,622 --> 00:05:31,749
I think the quickest way
to find you a new girlfriend
93
00:05:32,041 --> 00:05:35,503
is just to get you on
every dating website out there.
94
00:05:36,045 --> 00:05:38,423
Are you sure?
I've heard that on those sites,
95
00:05:38,631 --> 00:05:40,633
often when you think
you're corresponding with someone,
96
00:05:40,883 --> 00:05:43,886
it's actually a computer program
pretending to be a real person.
97
00:05:44,178 --> 00:05:47,015
And you're afraid
it'll do a better job than you?
98
00:05:48,599 --> 00:05:52,228
Excuse me, no one does a better job
pretending to be a person than I do.
99
00:05:53,771 --> 00:05:56,607
Siri comes close, but I know more jokes.
100
00:05:57,650 --> 00:06:00,445
Well, if you don't want to use
dating websites, what do you suggest?
101
00:06:00,778 --> 00:06:01,988
Off the top of my head?
102
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:05,241
Prospective women
weed themselves out in a battle of wits
103
00:06:05,408 --> 00:06:07,035
until only one champion remains,
104
00:06:07,410 --> 00:06:09,912
she shows up at my door
flush with the thrill of victory,
105
00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:13,458
and then sits quietly by my side
while I watch Daredevil.
106
00:06:15,293 --> 00:06:17,378
You seriously think women
would fight for you?
107
00:06:17,962 --> 00:06:20,590
People compete for jobs and trophies,
why not me?
108
00:06:22,133 --> 00:06:23,801
He's right. He knows a lot of jokes.
109
00:06:26,137 --> 00:06:28,848
No, but it is basic human nature.
110
00:06:29,057 --> 00:06:31,434
If we present him as a prize,
maybe they would.
111
00:06:32,185 --> 00:06:34,979
Well, he's smart,
he's a respected scientist.
112
00:06:35,605 --> 00:06:38,691
And I have the soulful eyes of a cow.
113
00:06:40,193 --> 00:06:43,821
- (SCOFFS)
- I don't know if I'd say you... Oh.
114
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:49,702
I have an idea. What if we put
a post on Craigslist that says,
115
00:06:50,078 --> 00:06:52,872
"World-class Caltech physicist
seeking girlfriend.
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00:06:53,206 --> 00:06:57,418
"If interested, solve the following
puzzles for a chance to meet him."
117
00:06:57,794 --> 00:06:59,420
Oh, we'll make the puzzles
extremely challenging
118
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to eliminate unworthy candidates.
119
00:07:01,756 --> 00:07:03,466
Oh, we can set it up like a scavenger hunt
120
00:07:03,633 --> 00:07:06,844
where the last puzzle gives the winner
Sheldon's contact information.
121
00:07:07,386 --> 00:07:09,180
This is actually
an interesting social experiment.
122
00:07:09,722 --> 00:07:11,516
I'm a little jealous of the people
who get to do it.
123
00:07:11,849 --> 00:07:13,684
Me, too, and we've seen the prize!
124
00:07:18,606 --> 00:07:20,858
I don't understand why we're leaving
so early for the movie?
125
00:07:21,025 --> 00:07:22,985
Oh, I forgot to tell you,
we're gonna meet up with Bernadette
126
00:07:23,236 --> 00:07:24,779
to spy on Amy and her date. (CHUCKLES)
127
00:07:25,113 --> 00:07:26,906
What? I don't wanna do that.
128
00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:30,535
And you think I wanna see a documentary
about aluminum can recycling?
129
00:07:31,202 --> 00:07:34,539
This is the movie that Big Soda
doesn't want you to see.
130
00:07:35,540 --> 00:07:38,084
Yeah, it's the movie
your wife doesn't want you to see.
131
00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:42,839
So, you're actually okay with invading
your friend's privacy?
132
00:07:43,381 --> 00:07:46,300
- You're not curious who she's out with?
- Not really.
133
00:07:46,717 --> 00:07:48,845
But you're curious about aluminum cans.
134
00:07:51,264 --> 00:07:52,932
You're a weird little guy.
135
00:07:56,769 --> 00:08:00,356
That's it. The Sheldon Cooper
Girlfriend Challenge is officially live.
136
00:08:00,565 --> 00:08:01,566
(CHUCKLES)
137
00:08:01,732 --> 00:08:03,234
- Congratulations.
- This is exciting.
138
00:08:03,442 --> 00:08:04,569
Right now, somewhere,
139
00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:07,989
a woman is dividing the atomic weight
of the best noble gas
140
00:08:08,156 --> 00:08:11,200
by the number of colors
in the oldest national flag still in use--
141
00:08:11,409 --> 00:08:13,411
Then using that number as
the average speed to calculate
142
00:08:13,578 --> 00:08:15,371
- the travel time from Mordor to the Shire.
- (CHUCKLES)
143
00:08:15,830 --> 00:08:18,916
And taking her first step towards
a lifetime of laughter,
144
00:08:19,083 --> 00:08:21,752
love and best of all, rules.
145
00:08:22,753 --> 00:08:25,131
I hope we didn't make
the puzzles too hard.
146
00:08:25,673 --> 00:08:28,718
Well, if she can solve them,
it'll prove she's intelligent,
147
00:08:28,926 --> 00:08:30,970
tenacious and so socially awkward,
148
00:08:31,220 --> 00:08:32,847
she has nothing better to do
on a Saturday night.
149
00:08:33,097 --> 00:08:34,098
(LAUGHING)
150
00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:37,435
Golly, she sounds too good to be true.
151
00:08:40,479 --> 00:08:43,608
This is fun.
I haven't dated much since my divorce.
152
00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:45,818
Well, I'm having a good time, too.
153
00:08:46,152 --> 00:08:49,030
If you don't mind me asking,
why did you and your wife split up?
154
00:08:49,405 --> 00:08:51,616
Oh, you know how it is,
we wanted different things.
155
00:08:51,866 --> 00:08:55,536
I wanted children, and she wanted
a pastry chef named "Jean-Philippe".
156
00:08:57,205 --> 00:08:58,664
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- It's fine.
157
00:08:58,956 --> 00:09:02,126
It's why I left England.
It reminded me too much of her.
158
00:09:02,627 --> 00:09:06,797
Cold, gloomy, and easily accessed by
a Frenchman through a tunnel.
159
00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:12,929
- Hey. So, where are they?
- Across the street, in the left window.
160
00:09:14,347 --> 00:09:16,140
Oh, damn it,
we should have brought binoculars.
161
00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:17,975
Right here.
162
00:09:19,268 --> 00:09:21,103
You just happen to have those in the car?
163
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:25,024
Kind of. Before I met Howie, I liked to
keep close tabs on my boyfriends.
164
00:09:25,316 --> 00:09:26,817
By stalking them?
165
00:09:27,109 --> 00:09:28,611
No, stalkers are creepy.
166
00:09:29,403 --> 00:09:32,990
I'm just a harmless little girl
with military grade spy equipment.
167
00:09:34,533 --> 00:09:36,953
PENNY: Oh, there he is.
BERNADETTE: He's cute, right?
168
00:09:37,119 --> 00:09:38,162
Yeah.
169
00:09:38,496 --> 00:09:39,622
Can I see?
170
00:09:39,872 --> 00:09:42,208
What? Now you're interested?
You didn't even want to come.
171
00:09:42,458 --> 00:09:45,503
I know, but you guys make
being a crappy friend look fun.
172
00:09:46,337 --> 00:09:47,421
Fine.
173
00:09:48,923 --> 00:09:50,508
LEONARD: Yeah, okay, I see him.
174
00:09:50,841 --> 00:09:53,803
It looks like they're having a nice time.
I wish I could hear what they're saying.
175
00:09:54,011 --> 00:09:55,846
Yeah, I should have brought
my parabolic microphone.
176
00:09:56,180 --> 00:09:58,015
- Your what?
- Nothing. Not important.
177
00:09:59,684 --> 00:10:00,768
So, you've never been married?
178
00:10:01,185 --> 00:10:06,148
No. To be completely honest, I've only
been in one long-term relationship.
179
00:10:06,732 --> 00:10:08,943
- What happened with that?
- That's a good question.
180
00:10:13,656 --> 00:10:17,034
After five years, it was just feeling like
more work than it should be.
181
00:10:17,326 --> 00:10:19,578
That's too bad.
Was he a neurobiologist like you?
182
00:10:19,829 --> 00:10:23,040
No, he's a theoretical physicist
at CalTech.
183
00:10:25,793 --> 00:10:28,296
I love teaching math,
but that would be my dream job.
184
00:10:28,504 --> 00:10:29,839
What's his focus?
185
00:10:30,089 --> 00:10:33,342
Um, it used to be string theory,
now it's dark matter.
186
00:10:33,634 --> 00:10:36,554
But let's not discuss Sheldon,
let's get back to you.
187
00:10:37,221 --> 00:10:40,182
Wait, you're not talking about
Dr. Sheldon Cooper?
188
00:10:42,226 --> 00:10:43,728
I'm trying not to.
189
00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:46,480
Do you know him?
190
00:10:46,939 --> 00:10:50,067
No, but I've followed his work for years.
He's a rock star.
191
00:10:50,484 --> 00:10:53,070
You've got to tell me about him.
What's he like?
192
00:10:56,282 --> 00:10:58,534
He really seems into her.
193
00:11:00,286 --> 00:11:03,914
I took a video.
I forgot how much fun this is.
194
00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:07,960
Okay, we saw them.
Can we go catch the movie?
195
00:11:08,169 --> 00:11:09,170
(PENNY EXHALES)
196
00:11:09,378 --> 00:11:11,964
- Why'd you bring him?
- I had to, we're married now.
197
00:11:13,466 --> 00:11:14,550
Ah, I hear that.
198
00:11:21,265 --> 00:11:23,100
I'm sorry,
just one more question about Sheldon.
199
00:11:23,392 --> 00:11:24,435
Sure, why not?
200
00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:27,730
It's more of a four-part question, really.
201
00:11:29,523 --> 00:11:33,277
When he wrote his paper on supersingular
prime numbers, how long did it take?
202
00:11:34,278 --> 00:11:36,238
Um, about an hour and a half.
203
00:11:36,447 --> 00:11:37,448
Wow!
204
00:11:39,658 --> 00:11:42,745
I mean... Wow!
And you were there to see it?
205
00:11:43,287 --> 00:11:45,289
Yes. Yeah, we were on a date.
206
00:11:47,333 --> 00:11:48,667
Very much like this one.
207
00:11:50,419 --> 00:11:53,297
I doubt it was like this one.
I mean, he's a genius.
208
00:11:53,631 --> 00:11:54,965
And I wasn't even smart enough
209
00:11:55,299 --> 00:11:58,302
to figure out why
my wife always smelled of croissants.
210
00:11:59,178 --> 00:12:00,846
What was the rest of your question?
211
00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:03,599
- Do you think you can introduce me to him?
- Really?
212
00:12:03,974 --> 00:12:06,268
You want me to introduce you
to my ex-boyfriend?
213
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:08,521
You're right, it's weird.
214
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:09,814
No, wait. Do it.
215
00:12:11,482 --> 00:12:14,318
No, I changed my mind, I'd be too nervous.
216
00:12:15,236 --> 00:12:16,987
Oh! I don't know what to do!
217
00:12:19,323 --> 00:12:21,742
Are we gonna be much longer?
I really have to go to the bathroom.
218
00:12:21,992 --> 00:12:23,160
Right here!
219
00:12:28,290 --> 00:12:31,043
37 minutes left until the deadline.
220
00:12:31,377 --> 00:12:33,003
Someone will show.
221
00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:36,173
And no matter what happens,
this was still a fun experiment.
222
00:12:36,507 --> 00:12:39,510
Not as fun as the night
we blew up grapes in the microwave.
223
00:12:40,761 --> 00:12:42,972
We really have led full lives.
224
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:46,183
Someone will show.
225
00:12:46,434 --> 00:12:48,310
Maybe you don't want someone
exactly like you.
226
00:12:48,519 --> 00:12:50,563
You know what they say, opposites attract.
227
00:12:51,063 --> 00:12:55,025
By that logic, I should be with someone
short, dull, and needy.
228
00:12:55,860 --> 00:13:00,406
Not to cast dispersions, but I can't shake
a stick around here without hitting that.
229
00:13:05,995 --> 00:13:09,081
You know, I once drove 500 miles
to hear him speak at Stanford.
230
00:13:11,709 --> 00:13:15,171
- I have a DVD of that lecture.
- Really? Wasn't it great?
231
00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:19,049
Not as a Valentine's present, no.
232
00:13:19,925 --> 00:13:21,385
Well, the next time you watch it,
233
00:13:21,719 --> 00:13:25,848
I'm the bloke who asked the question
that he said was stupid and obvious.
234
00:13:26,140 --> 00:13:28,851
It was the nicest thing
he said to anyone there.
235
00:13:29,727 --> 00:13:33,522
That's, um, terrific. Listen, um,
I'm kind of tired. Can we call it a night?
236
00:13:34,106 --> 00:13:38,110
Oh, gosh. Sorry, I just spent the whole
night talking about your ex-boyfriend.
237
00:13:38,319 --> 00:13:40,738
- I'm such an idiot.
- No, you're not.
238
00:13:41,155 --> 00:13:42,448
Well, maybe not an idiot.
239
00:13:42,740 --> 00:13:45,951
But certainly not as smart as...
Someone we won't mention.
240
00:13:46,911 --> 00:13:47,912
Thank you.
241
00:13:48,329 --> 00:13:51,665
That you said you might introduce me to.
I'm free on Thursday.
242
00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:54,627
- Hey, they're leaving.
- What? Here, gimme, gimme.
243
00:13:56,754 --> 00:13:59,381
Oh, my God, oh, my God.
They're coming right towards us.
244
00:13:59,590 --> 00:14:01,842
- We gotta get out of here.
- Wait, what about Leonard?
245
00:14:02,176 --> 00:14:04,762
- He and his tiny bladder can take the bus.
- (SEATBELT CLICKS)
246
00:14:05,137 --> 00:14:06,263
(ENGINE STARTING)
247
00:14:07,765 --> 00:14:08,766
(BOTH SCREAM)
248
00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:10,726
Oh, no!
249
00:14:15,064 --> 00:14:16,398
She just hit my car!
250
00:14:17,483 --> 00:14:19,193
What are you guys doing here?
251
00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:22,446
Hi, Ames! What're you doing here?
252
00:14:24,615 --> 00:14:27,576
- What happened?
- OMG.
253
00:14:28,244 --> 00:14:30,829
- Aren't you Leonard Hofstadter?
- Yeah?
254
00:14:30,996 --> 00:14:33,457
I saw you speak at Stanford
with Sheldon Cooper.
255
00:14:33,791 --> 00:14:37,211
Amy, can you believe it?
It's Dr. Leonard Hofstadter!
256
00:14:38,337 --> 00:14:39,964
No, pinch me!
257
00:14:40,673 --> 00:14:43,050
It's an absolute pleasure to meet you.
Can I shake your hand?
258
00:14:43,759 --> 00:14:46,512
I don't know if you want to do that,
I was just... Okay, never mind.
259
00:14:48,013 --> 00:14:51,016
- Amy, I'm never washing this hand again.
- You really should.
260
00:14:54,353 --> 00:14:57,439
60 seconds, this is not looking good.
261
00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,441
One minute is a long time.
262
00:14:59,858 --> 00:15:01,986
Oh, I've been telling women that
for 20 years.
263
00:15:05,322 --> 00:15:07,825
- 45.
- 45 seconds is plenty of time
264
00:15:08,033 --> 00:15:11,287
for a woman to walk through that door
and fall in love with me.
265
00:15:11,662 --> 00:15:14,415
And probably half that
if I break out the old cow eyes.
266
00:15:15,791 --> 00:15:16,875
30 seconds.
267
00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:18,335
Uh-oh.
268
00:15:18,669 --> 00:15:22,006
- What if it's Jennifer Lawrence?
- What?
269
00:15:22,381 --> 00:15:24,675
Oh, that last Hunger Games
was not my cup of tea.
270
00:15:25,509 --> 00:15:27,386
You thought she was great in X-Men.
271
00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:30,347
Fine, I won't shut my heart
to the love of Jennifer Lawrence.
272
00:15:32,016 --> 00:15:34,018
Guys, 15 seconds.
273
00:15:34,184 --> 00:15:36,520
Maybe she's waiting to show up
at the last possible moment.
274
00:15:36,854 --> 00:15:40,691
Ugh. Sounds like a drama queen. Oh, no.
It is Jennifer Lawrence.
275
00:15:42,818 --> 00:15:49,199
Five, four, three, two, one.
276
00:15:54,455 --> 00:15:55,873
That's too bad.
277
00:15:56,206 --> 00:15:58,292
Maybe we did make the test too difficult.
278
00:15:58,584 --> 00:16:00,753
(SIGHS) I don't think it matters.
Look, Sheldon,
279
00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:03,088
I believe when the time is right
for you to meet someone,
280
00:16:03,505 --> 00:16:04,923
it'll just happen, okay?
281
00:16:05,174 --> 00:16:07,217
Not because of a test or a website,
but because--
282
00:16:07,384 --> 00:16:08,385
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
283
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:12,139
We are the dreamers of dreams!
284
00:16:18,562 --> 00:16:20,898
It's an actual girl
and she's really pretty!
285
00:16:21,273 --> 00:16:22,274
Answer it!
286
00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:24,443
All right.
287
00:16:30,532 --> 00:16:31,700
Can I help you?
288
00:16:32,242 --> 00:16:34,912
Um, are you the physicist
that placed the ad on Craigslist?
289
00:16:35,412 --> 00:16:38,165
- Yes.
- Hi, I'm Vanessa Bennett.
290
00:16:38,582 --> 00:16:41,335
Sorry it took a while for me to get here.
I was stuck in this boring symposium
291
00:16:41,502 --> 00:16:44,254
on atomic spectroscopy
when I came across your ad.
292
00:16:44,463 --> 00:16:45,673
And it saved my night. (CHUCKLES)
293
00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:47,466
The puzzles were really fun.
294
00:16:47,758 --> 00:16:51,970
I've never had to translate Klingon
into ancient Sanskrit before.
295
00:16:54,682 --> 00:16:56,642
Careful, it's addictive.
296
00:16:58,894 --> 00:17:00,813
(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)
297
00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:05,943
Or as they say in Sanskrit,
298
00:17:07,152 --> 00:17:09,863
(SPEAKING SANSKRIT)
299
00:17:11,115 --> 00:17:13,450
And just like that,
you're a Klingon-Sanskrit junkie.
300
00:17:14,952 --> 00:17:17,329
Anyway, I just knew
I had to meet the person responsible
301
00:17:17,705 --> 00:17:19,164
for such a brilliant idea.
302
00:17:19,456 --> 00:17:21,917
And I don't need to tell you there aren't
a lot of men who love physics,
303
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:24,878
archaic languages and flags of the world.
304
00:17:26,130 --> 00:17:28,048
I am a bit of a unicorn.
305
00:17:29,383 --> 00:17:31,885
Well, you certainly seem
like a special lady,
306
00:17:32,136 --> 00:17:33,929
uh, but as you know,
you missed the deadline,
307
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:35,139
so thanks for playing.
308
00:17:38,308 --> 00:17:39,309
What?
309
00:17:43,147 --> 00:17:44,732
How could you send her away?
310
00:17:45,107 --> 00:17:46,817
She was late.
311
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:52,489
And she found atomic spectroscopy boring.
I wouldn't coitus her with your genitals.
312
00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:00,831
(HANDBRAKE CLICKS)
313
00:18:01,123 --> 00:18:03,500
- Uh, thanks for driving me home.
- No problem.
314
00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:06,712
- I'm really sorry about your car.
- Oh, it's all right.
315
00:18:07,004 --> 00:18:09,214
If you're free next weekend,
I'd love to take you out again.
316
00:18:09,882 --> 00:18:10,883
Um...
317
00:18:11,175 --> 00:18:15,179
Listen, you're a really nice guy,
but I don't think this is working out.
318
00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:17,681
Oh. Okay.
319
00:18:18,015 --> 00:18:19,975
Um... I'm really sorry.
320
00:18:20,267 --> 00:18:21,226
Oh...
321
00:18:21,643 --> 00:18:25,105
At least the same woman
that rejected Sheldon Cooper rejected me.
322
00:18:27,691 --> 00:18:29,067
There ya go. (CHUCKLES)
323
00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:32,446
If I ever do meet him,
we'll have that in common.
324
00:18:33,030 --> 00:18:34,740
Sure. (CHUCKLES)
325
00:18:35,032 --> 00:18:38,619
And he's kissed you and I've kissed you,
so if you think about it--
326
00:18:38,827 --> 00:18:40,329
Okay, get out.
327
00:19:09,733 --> 00:19:10,734
English - SDH